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Beck Diet For Life/Solution October 2013 Support, Discussion, Buddy/Coach

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Old 10-11-2013, 05:18 AM   #61
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Ilene! It's been years! How are you? I am a long-term lurker here at Beck. I call in from time to time and people are very kind to me but I can't seem to get the regular posting going at all.

onebyone, I'm voting every day.

Everyone, thanks for your patience with me. I do appreciate your postings very much. Still working on only eating when sitting down. I do best when there is space so I don't feel hurried and crowded. All the more reason to keep working on the environment(s). Recently, I've started saying myself "What would Lexxiss do? She would just clear it up, straightaway." And so I do! Lexxiss, you are such a good influence! Thank you very much!

I do like the accepting yourself conversation here.
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Old 10-11-2013, 05:41 AM   #62
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Thanks for the warm welcome everyone...

Hi Silver

I'll just be lurking, reading and absorbing information for the moment
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Old 10-11-2013, 06:30 AM   #63
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Thumbs up Welcome Nancy (27toGo)

Nancy (27toGo)

And, in case you didn't get this three years ago,

How did you discover the books by Dr. Judith Beck?

And how did you find this thread on 3 Fat Chicks?
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Old 10-11-2013, 06:30 AM   #64
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Thumbs up Welcome Ilene

Ilene

And, just in case this hadn't been invented 12 years ago!

Neat that you discovered Beck from this very thread.
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Old 10-11-2013, 06:34 AM   #65
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Thumbs up Friday

Diet Coaches/Buddies It's the day to tick my monthly counters that I've been on this journey a while, CREDIT moi. The goal is to be the Energizer Bunny in this.

Exercise was walking for hours at the Topsfield Fair. There are many local fairs and this is one of the great ones. I reviewed horses, llamas, sheep, corn, honey, etc. - the whole country fair extravaganza. I resisted fried Mars bars, German Fries, Corn Dogs, and fudge. I planned for one absurd item for the day and chose a standard old Italian Sausage. I need an Italian Sausage fix every now and then so this suffices for a spell. DW fell for some Apple Cider donuts. One a day will not keep the doctor away. Walgreen's gave out a FREE tote bag if you let them measure your blood pressure. Naturally I did and it's the same healthy set of numbers that I love. I was in line behind a woman who assured the nurse that her numbers would be healthy because she "took medication to make them so," as she smoked her cigarette.


onebyone Waving. Voted today.

Joy (gardenerjoy) Think I'll steal this, "if I feel like eating something that isn't on my plan, I'll take a walk."

CeeJay - Congrats for leaving the 190's forever. Kudos for "-walking 20 minutes today despite a lot of leg pain" - but do hope you're being mindful of not hurting it.

Debbie (Lexxiss) A 30 gallon bag is a lot of packrat nest. Good riddance. Yay for the project moving along well.

silverbirch Yep, "eating when sitting down" can be easy to forget.

maryann - Nothing like a "miss mash day" to stress serenity. Kudos for plowing through it.

nationalparker LOL at, "breathing deeply - takes too long" - the sabotaging brain never sleeps. Kudos for taking the time to post here even when facing four hours of homework.

Beth (bethFromDayton) Kudos for a great mantra, "I don't eat sweets at work." Pep Talk: Make a to-do list for your evening - one that includes the relaxing things you want to do. It'll be easier to avoid eating if "Sit in favorite chair and read trash novel" is a scheduled item.

Nancy (27toGo) - Yep, ""habits" are the problem" - and setting out to develop new habits is a solution. You're ahead of the game by starting out knowing this already. Glad that you've joined us.

Ilene - So good to see you here. Neat that 27toGo inspired you to make your first Beck thread post (although you have to date some 12,147 posts in other parts of 3FC).

Readers -
Quote:
day 7 Arrange Your Environment

Changes at Home Follow these suggestions for reducing food triggers in your kitchen: . . .

Consider Others. Here are some things you can do:
  • Tell everyone at home that you're going to be eating in a more healthful way. You don't have to disclose that you're trying to lose weight unless you want to.

Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Beck Diet Solution (Pink book), pg 91.
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Old 10-11-2013, 07:26 AM   #66
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Hello coaches,

Wow - so much has happened while I have been offline for a few days.

Welcome 27togo and Ilene - I hope you both find Beck as useful as I am finding it.

Beth - it sounds like I have missed the window to add to the pep talk - but just in case some more would be helpful ... When I read your post the two things that went through my mind were thinking about how much of an inspiration you have been, and continue to be to me. Very early in my days on here you posted some pics - I remember in one you were standing on a table, wearing a cowboy hat maybe - I often think of those photos if my motivation is waning and think "I know someone who fixed her health that much - so maybe, just maybe if I hang in there now I can do it too". The other bit I thought is how very wise and brave you are to ask for a pep talk.

On my front - I have been hanging in there despite limited posting. Had a no weight loss week but feeling Ok with it. Last week was a big loss and my exercise was down because of being crook - so I remain hopeful that this week will be a loss again. A BIG credit for the week - I have been doing a mind - bogglingly boring work task the last 2 weeks - mostly I love my work, except when this task arrives. Usually I bribe myself through it with chocolate but this time I am not. Have only had one bout of "I have to -this is not want, this is need" to contend with so far and will hopefully be finished by mid next week so I can do it! And super proud that I have gotten this far chocolate free.

Off to the beach for a couple of days. Really looking forward to being there in better health with the prospect of doing some bushwalks and some kayaking evoking a "yay" rather than a "wow that sounds exhausting" response. Feels like the first little taste of the reward. And with that thought there are tears. Amazing how it takes believing I can be healthy and active to let me accept just how much it breaks my heart that I haven't been for so long.

Will be back in a few days with salt water in my skin :-)
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Old 10-11-2013, 09:30 AM   #67
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I did fine on my day home alone -- mostly because I worked it all out here so I knew exactly what to do. Thanks, y'all!

WI: -0.25 kg, Exercise: +50 475/1400 minutes for October, Food: 100% op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes
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Old 10-11-2013, 07:08 PM   #68
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Hello, all! Checking in here before i prep my dinner alone tonight. Last night DH has to work, then back on days. Am in a good place mentally with weight loss challenges and have really realized that, if I had just stuck with the half pound loss/week - average ... I'd be where I wanted to be this year. So when I'm grumping at myself for a very slow rate of progress down the line, I'll work to reorder my thinking. SilverBirch - you got me thinking to just accept the rate at which my body loses at this point in my life and accept that.

Have done great so far today. Will prep week's menus and aim to eat wisely on DH's days off - I'm seeing that as an area I need to improve.

Bill - LOL at the woman ahead of you in line. Good grief. Now what are German fries - of course I had to ask if it's potato-related. And whoo hoo on the 'nother month of beck success and leading us along this path.

ForMyGirls- Safe travels and I'm envious of your destination. I want a fortnight on a beach. No work, no phone, no commitments. I can dream
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Old 10-11-2013, 09:06 PM   #69
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Hello!!!

maryann-credit to you for staying OP during a difficult day.

BillBlueEyes-nice to read about wanting to walk instead of taking a ride. These fall evenings are so nice. Your trip to the fair sounds great.

bethFromDayton- sounds like you are quickly getting back into the swing of things. Credit for reaching out when you needed to.

gardenerjoy-yay for a good day!

27toGo- welcome!!! You have had an amazing weight loss. Looking forward to hearing about how you have done that.

Ilene- welcome to you also. Both of the Beck books and the workbook really helped me a lot.

nationalparker-sorry for a stressful week. Know all about weeks where you don't have time to breath.

Lexxiss-glad to hear you are doing fantastic with food.

silverbirch-waving hello.

ForMyGirls-enjoy your days on the beach. Your comment about how much it breaks your heart that you have not been healthy and active for so long really touched me.

For me- another day on track. I have to say it feels almost surreal to be in such a good place with eating. I think about the response card that says that when you stay on plan it makes life easier because then you don't need to struggle over food all the time. That is exactly where I am at.

Credit today for riding exercise bike, doing strength exercises for arms/shoulders, eating healthy and on plan, logging food and exercise at Sparks P., reading advantage and response cards and planning tomorrow.

Take care and wishing all Canadians a great Thanksgiving weekend.

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Old 10-11-2013, 10:47 PM   #70
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Good Evening, Coaches.

I seem to be having very emotional days this week. Feelings positive and negative keep trying to overwhelm me. Maybe part of the problem is I label feelings positive and negative. What would happen if I accepted every feeling as "is" and moved on from there? I know I have a terrible habit of grading myself for everything.

Went to my normal AA meeting. There were about 50 people there. A a ten year old boy was sitting in the speaker's chair swearing and mugging for the crowd. No one was willing to act on this. With the meeting about to start and people murmuring nervously ( a few had left in a huff), I went to the mother who was on the sidelines. I asked "Is there anything I can do to help?" I was thinking of my experience with some autistic kids who throw tantrums unexpectedly. I was thinking of the woman needing a meeting and not being able to attend one without her child. I was thinking of the newcomers in the room who had never been to a meeting and might have thought it was always a three ring circus. I was also thinking ( I am ashamed to add) about my fear of conflict when there is an issue ( an elephant in the room) and no one is willing to tell the truth. I didn't know how I could help, but I was willing.

She asked what I meant. I told her that in a few minutes our speaker was going to sit in that chair. I told her we had childcare in the next building. She rebuked me saying, "My son is autistic. He can't go to daycare." I said, "That is why I asked if I could help?" She started to make a scene saying "Are you telling me to take my son out?" I said, "No, I am asking if I can help because I understand the situation." She backed down, smiled and said, "No," and brought the boy to a seat where he was fairly non disruptive for an hour.

I guess I am telling this story because this kind of thing makes me very hungry. I judge myself mercilessly. Why am I the one who says something? Sometimes, to punish myself, I eat. "Take that, Mary Ann, you loud mouth."

My counselor says that as a child I made a decision to be the truth teller in a family of active alcoholics. There is a price for this role. I seem to have no choice, though. My counselor says it is the neuropath I created. It is who I am. Forgiveness of myself and others is the answer. And we have come full circle back to self acceptance.

Weight is two pounds under ticker. Food in MYFIT and I went to the mall and touched not one piece of See's Candy. I asked the if they had anything that did not have gluten, soy, corn, peanuts, dairy, eggs or artificial sweetener.

Surprisingly, they didn't

Thanks for listening.

Last edited by maryann : 10-11-2013 at 11:44 PM.
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Old 10-12-2013, 01:41 AM   #71
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Hi all,

Today, food-wise, medium. Breakfast, excellent--just as planned. I've been at my job for four days--and they had cupcakes today for my birthday! Lunch, went out with the group unplanned, but chose well (and had them move the chips away from me after I'd had more than I should have but less than I would have.) I'd already told someone who'd offered me a candy that I didn't eat sweets at work and word had gotten around. My boss asked if I could make an exception and I smiled and said 'no' and he asked if I could take one home for later--and I said yes. There were two of us with birthdays about 4 dozen cupcakes. I ended up taking 5 home (one apiece for after dinner--skipped the Chocolate Stampede and we all had cupcakes and ice cream instead)

I had a wonderful birthday surprise of my son and his girlfriend joining us for the evening for dinner, dominoes, and cupcakes. (And for evening alcopops and beer. Not so good)

But it's been a great birthday having both kids here and getting to know DS's girlfriend better. (She is wonderful) (Yeah, and I showed her baby pictures--he was a gorgeous baby) DS hasn't said anything--but he can't be surprised that his sister and I would show her!

I'm really proud of myself for not treating my birthday as an excuse for eating a cupcake at work--new job, new rules? Nope--new job--same rules--even on a special occasion.

Tomorrow will be on plan again. I haven't planned tomorrow out completely, but I find it easier to stay on plan for "home" days and tomorrow is a "home" day, food wise. (DD and I are going coat shopping--I no longer have a coat)

Take care, all!
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Old 10-12-2013, 06:57 AM   #72
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Thumbs up Saturday - Begin Canadian Thanksgiving Weekend

Diet Coaches/Buddies We had a smoke/CO detector die. It announces its own death by a series of beeps that, when you find the seven year old instructions, tell you that it isn't Fire, it isn't smoke, it isn't Carbon Monoxide - it's old age. Yep, when its internal timer hits seven years it won't stop beeping until you lay it to rest. There's a new model out with a lithium battery that lasts 10 years instead of seven for the same price - but you can NEVER turn it off. It's called 'Always ON.' Someday I'll figure out if that's a good deal.

Extra walking, CREDIT moi, because we had already entered the subway, waiting on the platform with the train approaching when DW asked if I had the tickets (to Mozart's The Magic Flute). Ooops! I had to run home, grab the tickets, and run back. We just made it before the curtain lifted. Yay for stupidity for getting a bit of exercise.


onebyone Waving. Voted today. (You were #2 on my display!)

Joy (gardenerjoy) Yay for Home Alone without bad things happening. Probably easier since Macaulay Culkin isn't cute anymore.

CeeJay - Every "another day on track" is Kudos worthy. Enjoy your Thanksgiving weekend.

maryann - I am touched by your story about helping the mother of the autistic boy despite the chip on her shoulder. Kudos for staying centered when she wasn't.

nationalparker Kudos for seeing that slow and steady is forward progress. [German fries are like thick, wrinkled potato chips.]

Beth (bethFromDayton) Kudos for standing down the cupcakes at work and bringing them home where they could be distributed. And Super Super Kudos for telling your boss of four days, "No" to that frequent request to make an exception. Great start on your new job.

ForMyGirls - Big Ouch for "being crook" (along with thanks for sending me to find out that it means "To feel sick or to be a thief - also made bad"). Kudos for breaking your history of chocolating your way through the boring two week task. Have fun in the salt water.

Readers -
Quote:
day 7 Arrange Your Environment

Changes at Home Follow these suggestions for reducing food triggers in your kitchen: . . .

Consider Others. Here are some things you can do:
  • Ask other adults for their help. Rather than demand that they also make changes, phrase your request like this, "Would you be willing to help me by ...?"

Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Beck Diet Solution (Pink book), pg 91.
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Old 10-12-2013, 08:48 AM   #73
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Good Morning Coaches,
Hello to everyone and welcome to the new coaches.
We got back from vacation late last night.
We were stuck at the border for over an hour. We have never waited that long. Oh well. Food while away was very good. Usually I treat vacation as a vacation from my food plan too. Not this time. I like the idea of walking when you feel like eating. I think I will start doing that.
Congratulations for all the successes and working out the struggles without food. I have found so many good things I can use from these posts. maryann how kind of you to offer to help that mother at the meeting.
Lexi, wow you have so much going on, congrats on not eating over it
Beth no treats at work is a great mantra, where I work there are always treats.
Bill - Great idea to leave the tickets at home and get an extra walk in. I am going to try that next time I walk to the store I will leave my wallet at home and then I will have to go back and get it so I get an extra walk in.
Ceejay, great job with another day on track.
Hello to everyone else and have a wonderful day. The rest of my family is waking up so I am off to enjoy family.
Take Care
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Old 10-12-2013, 10:28 AM   #74
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Good Morning, Coaches.

The boys are off harvesting again this morning. I am on the couch with a blanket looking at my beautiful fall leaves. I had a thought that maybe I wouldn't leave this seat all day. Credit that I modified the thought that I will leave the the seat for a brief time in which I will do Pilates.

Tomorrow is pumpkin patch day with my college buddies and families. I am bringing my hummus with fab new roasted tomato topping. Easiest recipe in the world. Cherry tomatoes coated in basil, salt, a little sugar and olive oil cooked in a 200 degree oven for three hours. To die for.

Newlifestyle: I am assuming the border you crossed was America's. Where did you go? Back East fascinates me now that I have been exposed to it through school (Vermont). I want to see Niagara Falls.

BBE: I have had many a smoke detector scare the daylights out of me.

Beth: Happy bday. Great rule "no sweets at work." Happiness for me is having my immediate family around me. Nothing else compares.

Last edited by maryann : 10-12-2013 at 10:32 AM.
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Old 10-12-2013, 10:43 AM   #75
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I had a bigger treat than I planned at the Dairy yesterday. I skipped my second snack to make up for it. And learned that I need to write more than "ice cream" on my plan because that's not enough defense against whatever special seasonal thing is being offered in a glorious photograph, 12 inches tall, at the cash register. Instead, I need to write "1 scoop of ice cream in a cup" because that's what I really intend.

WI: NC in kg, Exercise: +50 525/1400 minutes for October, Food: 80% op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

maryann: I think you're very brave and kind and that every one in that room was grateful, on some level, including the mother. Too bad no one said so!
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