Coaches,
I totally blew program this weekend but am back on track today, I am doing the day where I eat breakfast and then have nothing to eat until dinner time. So far it is going okay, I am starting to "feel hungry" I put that in quotes because I am not sure yet if it is actual hunger or if it is just my body responding to the fact that it is getting close to noon time which is usually when I eat lunch.
The drive north was rainy and wet but still pretty, didn't get to see any wildlife except an arctic wolf who was taking a nap in the middle of the road! He or she moved too quickly for me to get a picture.
I get back into cell phone range and have a few text messages from my best friend telling me that her daughter had a miscarriage this would have been her second baby, they found out it was a boy and named him Noah. I also found out that one of my longtime neighbors passed away Saturday morning.
I didn't eat over this which is a good thing so I will give myself credit for that.
Thanks the pup is adorable and I can hardly wait for him to come home so I can start training him and just so I have some company.
Fall is definitely here, the leaves are changing and it is only supposed to be in the 50's today! I am looking forward to winter in some ways but not in other ways. The winters here in interior Alaska are long, dark and cold and often snowy.
Finished the day OP! And actually planned my food for the next couple days. I have always resisted planning because I felt I was fine with flexibility. But today it occurred to me that it's not that I don't know how to cook a low-calorie meal, it's that if I don't have a plan I subconsciously allow myself to keep eating.
Anyway, I'm hoping tomorrow will be sane!
Midnightsun, I know what you mean about deciding if you're really hungry or if it just feels like time to eat. Some days I just can't tell.
Did two smart things before I left on Thursday: first, realized that I would get to the campsite too late to bike, so I took my bike into town when I got groceries and rode around campus for an hour--fun! Also I remembered in advance to eat lunch before I headed to town so i wouldn't get hungry and go off plan--I think this stuff may be becoming habit!
Thursday: on plan through evening
Friday: OP until the shots around the campfire, but usually drinking a bit makes me want sweets and I avoided that so 'credit'
Saturday: wow, did I go on a sugar binge after a really healthy morning. But by dinner I had a sugar hangover and stuck to decent dinner and no liqour.
Sunday: OP except for quick stop mistake on the way home.
Unfortunately my bike got a flat tire Friday morning
Plan: Hike tomorrow morning right after breakfast, weigh in next, plan for the day and hopefully celebrate another mini goal with non-food rewards. My gut however tells me that I need to get busy with exercise in order to start racking up mini goal rewards.
My day continued to defy planning and I ended up overeating over it. Darn it.
So, new rule. Snacks will only be eaten at home or from home.
I had been allowing myself one snack away from home -- ice cream (or custard or frozen yogurt) in the smallest size and in a dish. It's not triggering for me and it was a way that I could hold on to just a little of my former lifestyle that involved lots of foraging for treats while I was out and about. But I've noticed for several months now that it got me back into an old mindset. Every errand was potentially an opportunity to eat ice cream. It was the first thought I had when I thought of an errand (was there a place near there with ice cream?) and I'd get grumpy when I couldn't think of a good way to combine an errand with ice cream. Worse, I was finding myself, just like in the old days, inventing errands in order to get my ice cream.
That's all bad enough, but once in awhile it gets worse. Like yesterday when I was behaving the same way I did before I ever started this journey. Multiple stops, multiple treats, eating in the car as if I didn't have a rule against that. I even bought food at a gas station. I'm pretty sure that's the first time in nearly three years.
I came up with a metaphor. The ice cream exception is like tending a campfire on a hot, dry, windy day. Sure, if I'm careful and attentive enough, I can keep it from igniting a forest fire. But wouldn't it be more relaxing and fulfilling to make sure the fire is completely out and then take a nice hike? My life will be more peaceful with out this ice cream exception constantly on my mind.
I know how this will work. It will be an annoyance and an inconvenience for a couple of weeks while I adjust to snacks that only come out of my house. But the reward for that is years of more peaceful living with myself.
WI: NA kgs, Exercise: +35 1160/1400 minutes for August, Food: 50%op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes
I know I wrote a post last night. Guess I didn't press send. No matter. *credits*
following through on day one of my week of decluttering/cleaning
weighing in this morning: 249.6 (under 250. great.)
making a decluttering plan for today
making a foodplan for today
An enormous bruise is forming on my forearm today. It's from that shelf though I don't remember what event exactly injured me. I bruise easily. It won't deter me from my plans today.
I have sent DH off to work, I have had breakfast, I await a short visit from a friend as she travels from her mom's place to her Ottawa place and she usually stops by and takes me for coffee. She'll be here anytime. After that, when I get back, I'll begin my work. Toe goal today is a clean clear living room floor.
My other goal is to eat sitting down. I've been eating often standing up. Not a lot of food, but I am eating at the stove, shoving it in! Now that I am creating calmer spaces, it will be easier and more inviting to sit down and enjoy my meals.
I am fairly new to the forum and I am ready to start the WS program, and I really need support. I find it hard to do it by myself because I d not have anyone to make me accountable for WI or logging daily. I am really looking for someone to just be a buddy. I know that I am delinquent and I know I can do it for 7-8 weeks. I just do not have anyone to email...etc... I really would like to just start. I have all the tools etc... I am not sure why I need the support ...lol but I do . Can someone find it in their spare time to be a buddy?
Hi Coaches,
Just a quick post before I head off to my therapy session. I got on the scale this morning and was pleasantly surprised to see 265.9! That is down 2.2 pounds *credit* Yesterday I was doing the eat breakfast and then don't eat anything until dinner challenge and I only made it until 3 PM It is just something I will need to continue to work at. Today is my 20th day at 3FC and I am sooooo glad that I found this website and this forum it has really been wonderful.
Hello coaches,
A quick post. My son was at the dr's yesterday and she thinks he may have acid reflux or allergy's to food so we have to eliminate many things from his diet and track every thing he eats. This is working for me as I am eating OP, and preparing meals so that it works for his eating plan. Funny how easy it is when it involves someone else. I find it more difficult when it is just for me.
I am off to bed, got out walking today and just got home.
Have a wonderful evening. I am thinking of you all.
Take Care
Ann
Hi Coaches,
I had a decent day of being OP, I've lost track of how many days I have been off the soda, actually I have stopped counting because I really don't think about even drinking it anymore. My therapist and I figured out that I have lost 8 pounds in 13 days of being OP! She is thrilled for me and I am feeling better and better each day. I am planning to get a support brace for my one knee to help ease the pain I sometimes experience going up stairs. We spent the last part of the session discussing Beck and came up with different ideas that I can implement. I am actually doing a bit more research on going low carb as a 3rd choice behind the portion control and the calorie counting.
Anyways if tomorrow is as nice as it was today I am going to get out and walk.
Have a good evening everyone
Jaye
checking in once more on the last Wednesday in August 2012.
Coaches
*credit* weighed in to see weight rise overnight to 252.0lbs. Up 2.6lbs from yesterday.
*credit* for adhering and completing my clean up schedule for two days now-this includes yesterday.
*credit* made a plan for today's clean up.
*credit* for enjoying my new clean floor and emptier spaces
*credit* for eating from scratch
*credit for having vegetables at every meal yesterday
This morning I am feeling discouraged with my weightloss. Over the last week I have twice eaten much less than I am supposed to: once cause I just felt sick, and once cause I just forgot--this was Monday when I was assembling the shelf. After each of these days was when I saw the 249 numbers. As soon as I eat "normally" as in three meals, my weight goes up and over the 250 mark.
My inner critical voice tells me this is PROOF that I can't get below 250 EVER.
My says you don't know how to get below 250 and stay there. You can't do it.
My is actually telling me today to give up.
Give up? Really? A part of me wants to just give up but what I am really honestly feeling is tired. I've been moving lots of stuff around. It's heavy and awkward and my body is achey today.
So??
Also, it is | in the middle | of projects that I get most discouraged. All I remember is the work I've done and then my says see? You didn't even make a dent. Look how much you didn't do and still have to do. Give up. and I am starting to feel tired of the constant focus and the lack of other things, fun things, in my life for this (teeny tiny) time period of my life and my mind wants to do something else.
It strikes me that as I am writing about my house clean up efforts, these words apply EXACTLY to how I feel about being 250lbs! It's nice, (it's great for shutting up doctors), that I've lost 40lbs, but the body, the photographs, the way I look and feel is better, but far, far, away from where I want to be even though it feels like I have had to work so very hard just to get here where I am less uncomfortable than I was but still uncomfortable. =whinewhinewhine
BUT the *reality* is, this is when I turn the corner. IF I AM PERSISTENT... IF I JUST KEEP GOING... IF I DON'T GIVE IN... my environment will be permanently changed. If I stop now, it could revert and I will be discouraged as I can still visually see a big mess which is what I am working on today. From my seat in the living room area, I want to see a calm, clear, but fun visual horizon. Not the boxes and bags and piles of stuff that are impossible to decifer.
And weight-wise, giving up, or choosing to just not follow a plan, doesn't mean nothing happens. I won't be losing weight, and I won't be staying the same, I will be gaining, and what's truly worse, re-gaining my weight. Eating more veggies, and less everything else, is much easier for me to accept than it would be to accept back that 40lbs, or even 5 lbs., 2lbs, back, anything over that 250 is making me nuts. It's been 4 YEARS since I even touched 250. YEARS. I don't want to gain it all back in a few months and who knows how many more years of trying it would take to get back to where I am today.
It's going to be a packed three days to get everything done that I want done to meet my August goals and in advance of the remnants of Hurricane Isaac. We're hoping that it brings a couple of days of rain this weekend that are desperately needed. I've got mulch to spread, 220 minutes more exercise, 8000 more words, and other things on the list. Guess I better get to it.
WI: NA kgs, Exercise: +20 1180/1400 minutes for August, Food: 90%op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes
onebyone: love your discussion with the red-horned guy. And this conclusion: I'm off to have a good day. I'm going to go for that, too! Thanks for the challenge.
Jaye (Midnightsun68): Yay for seeing results of your efforts! The thing that helped my knee most initially was learning to do squats for exercise -- I started very gently at first, but as soon as my upper legs got just a little stronger I could feel the muscles working to protect my knees when I went up steps.
Ann (Newlifestyle): good luck with your son's elimination plan -- hope you figure it out. Cool that it's helping you out, too.
Welcome, Kimorea! What is the WS program? How did you find the Beck group? Are you reading one of Judith Beck's books? This group is all about being buddies for each other. It works better as a group, I find, because there's always someone here. I tried an email buddy once but it kind of just melted away. This group is rock solid and here 24/7.
Last edited by gardenerjoy; 08-29-2012 at 09:32 AM.
Onebyone,
I hear the discouragement, I get frustrated and discouraged when the scale crawls back towards 270. Hang in there and don't give up, don't listen to your inner critic. Keep on program and read your response cards, maybe make one that says "What my inner critic says is NOT true!"
GardenJoy I had not thought about doing squats I will have to try that and see how it goes. I have been doing stairs at least once a week for several years because my therapists office is on the second floor of the building the clinic is in and they don't have an elevator. Anyways it is pretty outside and I told you all that I was going for a walk so that is exactly what I am going to do once I change shoes.
Jaye
Diet Coaches/Buddies - Just waving this morning. Thanks for the good wishes for our eight day rafting adventure down the C_olorado River in the G_rand Canyon.
Wasn't just the rapids, was overwhelmed by the serenity: stars with Milky Way as we slept in the open on the sand; 1.8 billion year old Zoroaster Granite in the Canyon sidewalls; Ravens everywhere; (possible) California Condor way up; five Golden Eagles just circling; ruins from humans who braved the arid desert since the twelfth century. I never cracked the book we were encouraged to take along; didn't journal; didn't even take pictures (knowing that DW was clicking like mad). I simply laid back to experience the depth of time as I've never felt it before.
Eating was heavy, but not out of control - CREDIT moi. These rafting trips launch loaded with a quantity of food all of which must be eaten or discarded, so I had to watch steaks go into the garbage unless I volunteered to have a second; I didn't - special CREDIT moi for the many times I overcame the strong Sabotaging Thought that I should eat something so it wouldn't go to waste.
Hiked up side canyons for joyful exercise, CREDIT moi. It's a desert and the waterfalls overwhelm. Hard for my mind to balance that apparent contradiction.
Welcome to the new folks. I'll catch up on the posts as my brain reenters reality. Felt distanced from it all when the airport TV showed that one of the U.S. political parties had its convention, nominated its candidate, and I merely noted that the wife was wearing the predictable red dress. Would love to leave my brain back in the ether-less canyon while reality turns without me.
I never made a plan yesterday, but I ate what I would have written, so I'm giving myself a passing grade for that.
I picked up the CSA box without going to the custard place by the train station -- the first time that I can remember in a long time. I missed the custard less than the quiet moments by the tracks with the always present possibility of getting to wave to an engineer.
WI: -0.5 kgs, Exercise: +90 1270/1400 minutes for August, Food: 80%op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes
Jaye (MidnightSun68): hope you had a terrific walk!
BillBlueEyes: so glad you're safely home. We missed you! Sounds like you had a beautiful vacation with much wonderful and awe-inspiring adventure.
Good Morning/Afternoon coaches.
Today has been a good day. I find that if I walk/run in the morning I are more motivated. Planning meals for the whole day is working well for me. It is weird how that works.
School will start back in a few days and I realize that I need to take care of me and not worry about being the only volunteer in the area, not really, it is just when you volunteer they always ask you to do more, I need to learn to say no when it causes problems with my healthy lifestyle.
Welcome back Bill. Your vacation sounds wonderful.
Hello to everyone else
I am off for another walk.
Take Care
Ann
this would have been her second baby, they found out it was a boy and named him Noah. I also found out that one of my longtime neighbors passed away Saturday morning.
checking in
checking in once more on the last Wednesday in August 2012.
inner critical voice tells me this is PROOF that I can't get below 250 EVER. 
