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Beck Diet For Life/Solution – July 2011 – Support, Discussion, Buddy/Coach

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Old 07-11-2011, 03:30 PM   #76
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I haven't disappeared. Just struggling, like CeeJay, with the notion of posting when things aren't perfect (which, of course, is the absolute best time to post!) and, like onebyone, with how to balance healthy eating with healthy creative work (and taking to heart her observation that it's about balance).
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Old 07-11-2011, 07:26 PM   #77
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Hello All,
Like Ceejay and Gardenerjoy, it is a challenge to post today. I had a terrific OP day Sat but by middle of Sunday I was messing around. I thought I salvaged the day with no weight gain but I popped right back up two pounds. I am very discouraged today. I know it is what it is but I am blue and feel like throwing in the towel. This could be the backlash from my big three weeks of stuff. I have restarted the day twice. So, I would look for credit this moment.
Credit: son was healthy and happy all day
Credit: I stopped at one bowl of cocoa puffs.
Credit: I reminded myself this too shall pass.
Credit: Body combat at 6:30.
Personals tomorrow.
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Old 07-11-2011, 09:42 PM   #78
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Hi Coaches!

I'm wondering where we are in the moon cycle...all the energies here are bouncing off one another. I had 3 spills in 2 days; down the basement stairs, down the front porch, then down the back stairs (stair broke not my fault). After the 3rd, as I was inverted trying to get back up (and did) my first thought was thank goodness I am in such great shape now. It is the only reason I did not get hurt.*credit*
* Last night DH flipped at Home Depot (tired) because they acted like jerks over something they didn't carry (and should)....took it out on me
*This morning prompted by a phone call I rushed over to mom's to find her sobbing, "I can't do anything anymore!" (she turns 90 in 2 weeks and couldn't thread a needle to sew a button on)
* We've been having terrific storms and the pup has been going into full blown anxiety attacks daily.
*yesterday a spruce tree fell at Grandma's(where we're painting) but had missed both her house and the neighbor's.(and us)

I still have a sticky note on the front of my Pink book which says "finding normal amidst abnormal". Apparently, not much has changed.

So food today did not follow plan. I needed to make some spontaneous decisions as my original plan for the entire day changed in moments.
Credits:
~had my green smoothie before rushing over to mom's
~took her to a hair appointment and took myself to lunch at my favorite pizza buffet and acted with restraint. Had 3 thin slices (=1 large piece) and salad with a Tbsp of cottage cheese for dressing...reminding myself I could feel the feelings AND enjoy a peaceful lunch BY MYSELF without binging
~resisted all thoughts of donuts and fried pastries
~had a reasonable portion of NSA FF frozen yogurt when mom and I went for "ice cream"
~passed on dinner because I wasn't hungry.

It was the best I could do today and I realize there's a tomorrow in my future.

BillBlueEyes(fearless leader), yay for a stellar day! You've been working very hard for them. It's always so great to be reminded, "It wasn't that hard, because I had a plan…"

CeeJay, thanks for the reminder about stopping the all or nothing thinking. It helped me as I had to make some spontaneous decisions today. I'm putting wild rice on my menu list...it sounded so good.
Erika(eusebius), yay for 3 # down and a plan for your retreat.

onebyone, yay for cucumber and cherries at your potluck….wish I could tag along. Keep on planning!

Pam(pamatga), *credit* for your persisting for OP days with both food and exercise while trying to mend your back.

gardenerjoy, *credit* for posting despite a less than perfect day.

maryann, yay for persistence as you restarted your day more than once. Yes, this too shall pass.

I think I should make a plan for tomorrow.
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Old 07-12-2011, 05:19 AM   #79
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Thumbs up Tuesday

Diet Coaches/Buddies - DW joined me on the patio while she was having her snack of nuts. Felt good that the urge to grab a handful was low - that's an improvement over WANTING THEM NOW! No idea if it's a permanent fix or just a transient good place. CREDIT moi for my eating for the day whether the urges are permanent or transient.

Did gym; CREDIT moi. None of the folks carrying weight who appeared recently are still coming. It was exciting to think that doing gym had become OK with the overweight crowd. Alas, that was transient.


onebyone - Glad you're still here, 270's per, "279.5lbs." Good luck with being productive in the heat.

Joy (gardenerjoy) – Perhaps you can write a novel about a hero who balances all the major forces in his life - let your creative mind write down the solution then we (including you) can read it and figure out how.

Erika (eusebius) - Waving across the ether since you have no Internet at your retreat. LOL, indeed, at "by the end of the week I'll be levitating."

Debbie (Lexxiss) - Sometimes the moon gets stuck in its cycle, LOL. Kudos for demonstrating that it's possible to move on and leave the moon behind.

maryann - Neat list of credits. Yep, the scale pops up and down leaving us with the job of ignoring the short term stuff. When do you have to get back to writing?

pamatga - Ouch for flat on your back; hope that treatment works and you get back to your active life. [Yep, one sleeve is a serving of cookies - particularly Girl Scout Thin Mints.]

Readers -
Quote:
chapter 4 Stage 1 The Success Skills Plan

Success Skill 1 Motivate yourself daily

How to Get Yourself to Read the Advantages Deck
Make sure to contact your Diet Buddy to report that you made your Advantages Deck; reviewed your Response Cards from pages 21, 43, 44, and 46; and marked your progress on your Stage 1 Success Skills Sheet (pages 266-267).

Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Complete Beck Diet for Life (Green book), pg 56.
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Old 07-12-2011, 01:33 PM   #80
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Good Morning Coaches:
Yesterday was salvaged by my commitment to Body Combat class. It is proven over and over, you don't have to want to do something. You just have to do it. Because I was going to class I stopped snacking. After class I didn't want to snack. Scale showed no gain. Credit: I have written my plan for today. Credit: I just came back from Pilates/Yoga. Credit: DS is still happy and healthy and practicing piano and violin for lessons today. I am re-framing my thinking again this morning. Maintenance and near maintenance is as much work as losing weight! That is why so few people maintain weight loss.

Free Giant Zucchini at the club. Yum. That will be dinner.
BBE: My writing schedule begins today. I have to put in about 4 hours a day to keep up. Today's project is to annotate 3 of the books I just read.
Lexxiss: I agree , the moons must be in alignment. I nearly hit a bike pulling out of my driveway. He was on the sidewalk on the wrong side of the street and I never saw him. Yikes. Maybe it is a week of near misses I'll force myself to take the positive side.
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Old 07-12-2011, 06:07 PM   #81
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Hi Coaches

*credit for weighing in: +1.1lbs = 280.6lbs.

So. I was ontrack yesterday then DH called to say that a co-worker and his GF are going to the pub to play poker and do I want to join them?
Pub = pub food = beer = I won't care what plan I am on. So I decided no food for me. Have water. I thought "There's no way I can stick to that." There was also no way I could say no to the outing as I turned this particular configuration of folks down once before. The poker night was a bust so since none of us had eaten and it was after 7pm we went to a Big Servings of Meat place. My foodplan asks me to shun excess carbohydrates: bread, breading, potatoes, starchy veg, sweet things. So the special is "all you can eat fajitas". We all get the special. I get a diet (blech) cola and the fajitas come with rice (not OP) and beans and then a thing of soft tortillas (not OP) and all te fixin's which are ok. I KNOW I have the choice to just eat some stuff sans the tortillas but I choose not to. They are so soft and white and fluffy and warm. I have four. Then after the co-worker wants frozen yogurt across the street. I see FROZEN HOT CHOCOLATE!IWANTIWANTIWANT!!! I say NO. NO CHOICE. So I get the iced coffee and it comes with milk. Which I find odd. Then we are out walking to the car and I sip my coffee and... it's sweet! Argh. Sugar! I didn't even think to ask. I know I can choose not to drink it but... I decide to drink it. I drink it all. We came home and later I ate lots of cherries.

Got up, saw a weight gain back to the 280's.

So today I decide I am not going to raku fire anything but I'll go to the firing to watch the process until 1:30 then come home to paint. I got there and the person in charge of the firing says to me "I can't believe you roped me into this. I told you if there weren't three people firing (there were two) I wasn't going to do this." Um ok. Boy she was crabby. It's totally not my responsibility at all and I'm not taking it on, mostly, but gee it's been a long time since I dealt with crabby people who have no problem sharing their pain with others. She treated the people firing worse! Like they were small children. I really got a poor impression of her. Anyway the kiln wasn't up to temperature at 1:10 when I left after 2 hours of firing. It should have reached temperature way before then. I opted to leave and come home to paint.
That Guild is a real psychological challenge.
Anyway, all that to say, since I thought I wasn't staying very long I didn't contribute to the potluck. Then I was encouraged to partake and since I got snapped at and since everything was taking so long and since I was worrying about my schedule (I was feeling mega-frustrated) I ate instead of blowing up: cookies (4) hummus, crackers, bread sticks, tree nuts, banana bread, carrots. Then after I left I came home and ate lots of cherries. and then lots of strawberries. and a leftover steak.

I'm just a mess.

I have to say that seeing 280 again also opened the "omg why bother. you'll never do this," door.
Which makes me want to do something radical like slash the calories! eat only veggies! eat once a day! (RE: EMERGENCY! EMERGENCY! *except that it's not...)
I won't do it cause I simply can't do that anymore. I can't sustain a really extreme foodplan anymore. It only makes me feel better inasmuch as it's sort of a self-reflexive punishment for being "bad". And I guess that's what I've done. Instead of having good foods and bad foods, which I don't believe anymore, I do believe that *I* am either good or bad.

And that's about where I am going to stop this post. I think we can all relate.
Time to just get planning again.
So boring. So predictable. So NOT an emergency.
I still want to be less than 275. 5lbs is all I have to focus on. Oh well to all the rest. My inner drama queen is pouting. Oh well to that too.

Until tomorrow coaches...
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Old 07-12-2011, 09:59 PM   #82
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Hi Beck Friends

Credit today for ?????????????

OK- I do get credit for checking in here. I just struggle so much with posting when I am stress/emotional eating and am off plan. I sort of have the thought: who wants to read on a weight loss forum about someone like me who is not succeeding? I know that is lame because reading other people's posts when they are struggling always brings new ideas and insight to me and makes me feel not so alone in this wretched battle. It is also lame because some of the time I am doing very well. It is figuring out how to stay on plan when it is not easy, not convenient and when I am not feeling 100%.

How is it that I can do pretty much everything I set my mind to, do a big crazy job in a very stressful field, deal with not one but two dysfunctional families, and so on... but cannot seem to get a handle on this?

Appreciate you all more than I can say...

Take care everyone

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Old 07-13-2011, 06:11 AM   #83
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Thumbs up Wednesday

Diet Coaches/Buddies - Exercise was juggling stuff from one part of our house to another as we execute our plan to live in parts not being plastered or painted. The good news: I put a monster TV on the curb and it disappeared within an hour. Although working and wonderful, it was VERY old and had to go. I hope it's found a new life. CREDIT moi for doing what I had to do.

Eating was on-plan, CREDIT moi. I didn't weigh myself this morning because DW moved the scale and she's not awake yet to tell me where. There are a finite number of places it could have been put, and it's not in any of them. Now I'm kinda curious to learn where is the 'obvious' place she put it, LOL.


onebyone - Come back, Shane. Ouch for rough edged people invading your serenity. Yep, Sabotaging Thoughts are part of the journey, per, "omg why bother. you'll never do this," as are the Responses like, I am moving along; I won't be distracted that the scale fluctuates just as emotions do. I continue moving along.

CeeJay - Absolutely you deserve credit for "big crazy job in a very stressful field." Just because you do it every week - week after week - doesn't diminish the credit due. Yep, you're not alone.

maryann - Yay for Body Combat - whatever that entails. It's a neat name. Thanks for, "Maintenance and near maintenance is as much work as losing weight!" Lest we forget.

Readers -
Quote:
chapter 4
Stage 1 The Success Skills Plan

Success Skill 1 Motivate yourself daily

reality check

If you are thinking: I don't feel like doing this task.

Face reality: If you want to lose weight permanently, you will have to do things you don't necessarily feel like doing at the moment. But the payoff is so great!

Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Complete Beck Diet for Life (Green book), pg 56.
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Old 07-13-2011, 08:15 AM   #84
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Smile

For all of you who are going through a "rough patch", you are never alone. We all struggle. Yes, we have good days but we also have "rough patches". And, no, this space is not about being "perfect" but being human and sharing that with each other in a "safe place".

Credit: I always read everything going back to when I last posted so I feel like I am in the loop here.
Turned off the computer lately so I could spend Q-time with DH. With my crazy sleep schedule and request I get the whole bed to myself, I feel we need to connect everyday at some time even if it is watching the news with each other. We also do our LOTH together daily.
Back is still touchy but kept moving through my workouts very carefully. I love being able to put an X on the date when I am done. It is such a feeling of satisfaction.
Excessive heat does not make me want to get outdoors but today that is what I need to do for awhile. I am baking in the wee hours of the morning when it is the coolest. I am really loving the M.O.M.(Month of Meals) cookbooks compiled by ADA. I am substituting agave nectar for artificial sweetners and having great success! [Sidenote: agave nectar does not raise your blood glucose like regular sugar does] With my kitchen reorganized, I could spend hours in there (and I do!). "Master of my domain".

If it's any consolation, I am getting more nervous about some of the favorite restaurants I like to eat at: dodging land mines almost. Think. Plan. Execute.Like others here, I have put myself on a "schedule" to lose a specific amount of weight in a specific amount of time. Increasing exercise, particularly building muscle, is key.

Stay cool all. Pam
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Old 07-13-2011, 10:24 AM   #85
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Hi Coaches!

An A+ OP day yesterday until after dinner. I munched for comfort and it helped, but it won't help me in my goal to get thinner. I was unwilling to use my resistance muscle but finally did. Stopped and went to bed.

BillBlueEyes, I am so envious at your monster TV disappearing. I have one sitting right behind me on the 2nd floor. I don't know why it died it was only 6 yrs old. It's probably repairable if I can get it to Denver which is why it still sits. at not being able to find the scale...maybe behind the mini fridge?? Yay for OP eating.

onebyone, I read something the other day which said that there is a lesson in every food experience we have. Ouch for the psychological aspect of the pottery Guild. I don't do well in those situations. I hope you're feeling better. It's big progress when you recognize you can't sustain a really extreme food plan. *credit*

CeeJay, glad you posted. You are among like minded friends here, who struggle just as you do. Thanks for kind words...you are appreciated here, too.

maryann, BDS is so great for "maintenance minded thinking". It's a lifetime change.

Pam(pamatga), thanks for the powerful message to all of us as we acknowledge that we all have "rough patches". Yay for moving forward and trying new things. I bake with agave nectar, too.
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Old 07-13-2011, 11:26 AM   #86
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Hanging on by a thread. Working on figuring out how to make it a rope, that I can then climb back up to my healthy lifestyle. ...enjoying my metaphor :-)
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Old 07-13-2011, 11:44 AM   #87
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Arrow and after all that...

Coaches

So I : got on the scale this morning *credit* and I saw a paltry rise in weight of 0.2lbs bringing me to 280.8 today.

I felt like I was, oh, 295? 285 for sure... My sense of myself and my body are out of sync and have been out of sync for a good thirty years. I'm not kidding. I had dreams of returning to Ottawa for my art shows being visibly thinner. Alas it will have to do that I return with two pairs of fantastic linen pants bought in Key West that look very unlike what I normally would wear. I just need some nice top/blouse to set them off and a haircut. This is the best I can do since I won't magically be 20lb less. *credit for accepting reality and knowing I can still present myself well.

The landlord came and turned the air conditioner on yesterday. DH and I actually slept well last night. I almost turned the fan off too. I LOVE windows open though but keeping them closed to stay comfortable while I work is worth it, as is the sleeping part.

Back to the food. Today I feel that my food plan is obviously working as the weight isn't piling back on. I am maintaining an 11 lb loss from my most recent high weight.
I am poised at the brink of the 270's.
Nowhere for me to go but down.
It is a fact, not a feeling.

Thanks everyone for being here and for the words of comfort and encouragement. My feelings hijack me sometimes... and they are the MOST irrational when I am feeling my way around weight issues. Yikes. So hard... but don't we all know it? to us all - posters and lurkers alike.

Lexxiss I can't count the number of times taking to my bed has saved me from food. Taking on other people's feelings is a special talent I have so yeah, crabby people and powertrippers always throw me off emotionally. I never understand why people are mean - it always surprises and shocks me. (AND it surprises and shocks me that I am still so sensitive!) But, after many years, I can now sort out what is mine and what is theirs after the fact. I'm still smarting over that small jibe the Guild member took at me but really it just gives me the solid information to stay away from her. Too bad my food didn't treat me like that. It would be easier to stay away from it as well! to you too.

pamatga *credit for continuing to find the best way for you to work out and to steadily keep your eye on the prize ie. your weight loss goals. It is hard to post here when you keep feeling like a failure. But really, what else are we to do? No one here is giving up and everyone here has been in our shoes in one way or another. Thanks for reminding us it's ok to be and to say where we are at. I admire your unrelenting attitude of moving forward. Big Credits there!

BillBlueEyes RESPONSES?? OMG like I totally forgot about that part of the Beck Solution!
Quote:
Responses like, I am moving along; I won't be distracted that the scale fluctuates just as emotions do. I continue moving along.
Yes, that is a helpful response. I will try to work out a few more to the "I don't cares" and the "this will never works". Lassie always comes home... I await her arrival.

CeeJay for posting when feeling yukky and feeling sidetracked and temporarily offplan. You know Ceejay, our New Normal is being onplan now. I suspect both you and I are more onplan than off. I think I will start to mark this down for myself, like Lexxiss mentioned in her last post being A+ OP in the day and then offplan at night. That A+ morning does mean something! I have had days, weeks, months when I was NEVER OP at all. That just doesn't happen anymore. I come back I post here I find the strength to work at it once again. You do too. CREDIT

maryann This statement by you
Quote:
It is proven over and over, you don't have to want to do something. You just have to do it.
reminded me of a saying I heard ages ago : FEELINGS ARE NOT FACTS.
Wow. Can't believe my brain dug that up for me. Also, feeling something does not make it so. I discovered that today with the scale as I felt "so fat" but was up so little 0.2lbs that there's no way I could feel that small shift. I don't notice 20lb-40lb gains when I am in the food! Anyway thanks for your post and you are right; it is always work and always worth it. *credit for going to class when you didn't feel like it. Awesome.

Off to paint.

UPDATE

This one is for Lexxiss. You asked for a sunflower a few days back and it ate away at me until I gave it a go. I really don't ever paint flowers. I do like this one though hope you do too I did it today. Thanks for the inspiration.
Attached Images
File Type: jpg sunflwrst.jpg (35.6 KB, 14 views)
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Old 07-13-2011, 12:34 PM   #88
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onebyone: I read your post on the unplanned pub and the thinking that lead you to the flour tortillas and the sugared coffee and then to the demoralization you felt. I completely saw myself in the story - having lived it a thousand times before. Thank you for posting it. It reminds me I am not alone in the craziness of a food addiction. I remember how serious this journey is for me. It also helps me feel grateful that for today, I have a plan. It might not be perfect but it is a plan.
BBE: Your killing me with the missing scale. Don't these spouses KNOW how important the scale is? What are they - normal? My DH is always kidding me about bringing the scale wherever I travel. "For God's Sakes" buy six and leave them at the Tahoe place, the ranch, etc . . . Obviously he doesn't comprehend it must be THE SAME scale to accurately measure. But I am not compulsive NO, No, NO, No, indeed not. Nonetheless, the "scale" accountability is the only thing that keeps me real. My mind surely doesn't.
Gardenerjoy: I hear you. I know its tough. You have worked so hard to achieve goal and this patch seems like just a reaction to your tremendous achievements. This too shall pass. Stick with what has worked for you in the past.
Ceejay: There is an old saying The most painful place to be is hanging on to the wagon - not off or in. It seems to me your are committed to Beck but you are not taking comfort from that commitment because your program isn't perfect. Posting everyday, being willing to tell the truth is enough. You don't have to apologize for imperfections. The truth and the commitment has always helped me, even with my crazy-*** family.
Pamatga: I completely agree with loving the kitchen. I am no longer afraid of it because it is a dedicated "healthy" place now.
Lexxiss: Credit for mostly OP day. And your right eating DOES feel better - for the moment. Might as well not deny it. But it is the long term I look for.

As for my day: Put DS in a day camp for today. He is excited and I will get as much work done as possible. Scale didn't budge despite OP Day. But I ate my old meal that I had while I was losing. I felt full but it might be too much for this new weight. The scale is info. Credit for re-measuring myself to determine my new calorie needs. (The Zone has a formula)
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Old 07-13-2011, 07:44 PM   #89
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Hi Everyone! My name is Jennie (new to the forums)and I'm on day 9 of my new lifestyle and day 23 of the Beck Diet solution book. Do you mind if I join you all?
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Old 07-13-2011, 09:10 PM   #90
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Welcome to JennieT !! This is a great group and will bring you lots of support for your journey.
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