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Beck Diet For Life/Solution May 2011 Support, Discussion, Buddy/Coach

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Old 05-04-2011, 11:54 AM   #31
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They changed my favorite salad at the place we eat when we're at the Missouri Botanical Garden (often once a week, occasionally twice). Now, the chicken is fried instead of grilled. Sigh. Fortunately, they have added a pick two option and some new sandwiches. I guess my new favorite meal will be a 1/2 vegetable panini with a salad.

Day 19
: Stop Fooling Yourself. Some of these are insidious, aren't they? I'm not sure I will ever cease to be susceptible to:
  • Everyone else is eating it
  • I'll eat it only this one time
  • I'm upset, and I just don't care
...among others. Fortunately, this journey requires persistence, not perfection.

WI: NAkgs, Exercise: +60* 120/1200 minutes for May, Food: 80%op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

onebyone: glad to have you home and here. I've been fretting over your missing the space shuttle launch, but I'm glad you managed to enjoy your Grand Tour of Florida anyway. Sending healing energies for your back.

Hugs to ChefJoona, BeverlyJoy, Lexxiss, AnneWonders, eusebius and everyone else who is struggling right now.
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Old 05-04-2011, 01:40 PM   #32
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Beautiful Morning, my students are testing right now so it is uncharacteristically quiet. I feel peaceful today. Much better than the anxiety I had yesterday. The end of school brings lots of duties and I always feel like I should be doing more or better. Working through the feelings last nite I realized that I discount the extra I do on a daily basis than wonder why I am tired. It is a no win situation because I never feel enough. Just for today, I will be enough. I will practice moderation, try hard but also relax at times. I will enjoy the moment and the kids. Yesterday I veered off plan at teacher appreciation but credit for getting back on track, exercising, and losing a little weight this morning.
Big News: My juicer came yesterday. Yeah! An extravagance but this shiny Omega can juice anything - including greens. I am determined to up DH, DS consumption of vegis and, for myself, sneek in even more vegis. It really is a miracle. I tried apple/carrot and it was fantastic. I used the pulp to make bread this morning. I am thinking these last five pounds will be about incorporating even more vegis into my life and that dreaded one hour a day exercise gardenerjoy was talking about.
I hear those of you struglling with depression. You know it has been a battle for me. Beverley Joy, Eusibius, And everybody, you are not alone.

BBE and Lexxis: Nice choice on bake goods. They are my nemesis.
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Old 05-04-2011, 04:19 PM   #33
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I'll do personals first since I haven't in a few days.

Maryann - I hear great things about juicing. However, I prefer the whole fruit or vegetables because of the chew factor. Do you miss that?
onebyone-we all felt disappointed for you about the launch. I told my DH that you were going to attend and that this was a big deal for you so I knew you would be disappointed. Get a new scales. You will be glad that you did. I bought a digital WW one in November after wrestling with an on again off again balance scale for months. It gave me a false sense that I was doing better than I was. I ended up weighing 25 lbs MORE but after the initial shock, I knew that the truth was better than "fooling myself"--see Day 19 (powerful stuff). Now, when I weigh, I know that is the "truth". Carrying around all the extra weight is really hard on our bodies. Your back. My knees and hip. It's all the same.
Chefjoona look for a PM I sent your way. There is the entire poem "Patient Trust".
eusebius I too love to eat out. Some of the food plans tell you to avoid doing that but this is my take. It is a pleasurable activity that when done with thought and care you can still enjoy. I have multiple shortcuts on my computer from favorite local restaurants that I study, decide ahead of time what I can eat then I go ahead and enjoy myself. I have literally brought a napkin scribbled with my meal to buffet places. Last weekend after planting our garden, my DH and I even went to McDonalds: he had a chocolate shake (he still walks 30+ miles a week) and I the fruit n yogurt parfait. It was satisfying and felt triumphant that I could stay OP even there.

Please share with us anything you wish regarding your spiritual class regarding money and "stuff". As I have said before, when I decided to make my stuff fit my present physical environment I had to make some tough choices but now "I own my stuff, it doesn't own me". And, what I now see around me as I look around my home are things that give me pleasure and satisfaction. I don't think I could have said that before when I didn't even know half of what was in my storage unit. After all, if I hadn't a need for something in several months, then how important is it to me; I mean, really!

BBE-listen to your DW. In fact, she might be nominated "designated Chuck It" person in your household. Lots of wisdom there. Sounds to me you are having some difficulty "letting go". Maybe, you need to have a "goodbying" ceremony.
gardenerjoy---I remember how I felt laying down after losing the first 25 lbs, my girls weren't in my chin! Getting down on the ground is fantastic. Please share with us a photo or two in your avatar after you have taken your class. As they say here on 3FC, definitely a NSV (non scale victory).
beverlyjoy-have you tried alternative healing methods? Could you benefit from accupuncture or reflexology? My adult son swears by accupuncture for his chronic back problems (he fell on a slippery floor when he was a teen). My sister's traditional insurance even paid for it for her back. I am with you regarding pain. It takes everything I can do to get through the nights. I am going through a real rough patch although last night I did meet some other co-sufferers and we played cards online until 5 am.

Now, me. I watched 2 episodes of "Addicted to Food" on the OWN channel last night. After I watched "Biggest Loser". I don't know if I mentioned that I have a membership to BLC online site. I agree with what all you are saying. It is an extreme fitness regimen for extremely obese people. They are coming to that program with some life threatening health issues. However, a lot of people get mesmerized by the dramatic weight lose. They do work out 6-8 hours a day, supposedly. I mentioned "Addicted to Food" first because one of the bulimics on there is an exercise addict. I used to be one. I would exercise 2-4 hours a day in 1992-1998. My therapist, at the time, demanded I stop it because it was interfering with me dealing with some emotional issues. Avoidance is avoidance.

I follow the "Biggest Loser" food plan. The closer I follow it the better results I get. For example, I haven't had any added sugar whatsoever since last Friday. I am losing an average of .6 lb per day. Last summer when I was following it to the letter, I dropped 25 lbs in 5 weeks. Let's see how I do now.
Jillian was on Jay Leno (which I rarely watch) and she admitted that if people eat a clean food plan they really don't need to exercise that much. I am hoping she is correct because as much as I would love to "shred", I simply can not. I'm praying fervently for surgery for my joints. Last night, when I leaned over to load the dishwasher my knees locks, sending shooting pain up through my thighs. I keep my cane by my bedside. I have barely been able to move around even when I am awake. Now, I know what **** must be like.

I do not like the competitiveness of the show although it is neat to watch people who didn't believe in themselves start to see themselves in a different way. I feel like I am really finding renewed confidence going through this Beck book. I really am. I feel like her voice is coming through the words telling me I can do this. I really can.

For example, Day 20-Get on Track, which I did last night, is a perfect case in point. Well, since I joined this group back in February that has been my "story"--on again, off again. Pounds lost, pounds regained. Yes, there was depression fueling some of it. I felt like I was in such a mental fog. Now, that spring is here and I am not dealing with S.A.D.D., I want to get a good plan in place while I am feeling stronger.

However, as I have gone through the past 5-6 days in that book, making my Response Cards, rereading my cards, I have really felt like I have been given hope again that this is doable. I feel comforted by what she is saying. I made 3 Response Cards alone for Day 20 because, quite frankly, I needed to.

Card 1-Get Back OP Now!
Card 2-Draw a Symbolic Line!
Card 3-Learn From Your Mistake!

Now, I have other lines on those cards but these are in dark black ink, larger and highlighted with yellow marker. I am actually pretty good about getting back on track BUT I am really tired of not drawing that line and allowing myself too many times to eat off my food plan, which has seemed to evolve on its own. I did one full month in April of eating 3-4 servings fruits and 4-6 servings of vegetables and, guess what, I am really liking this "new way" of conscious, deliberate eating. I want to continue to eat this way. Just recently, I have also decided to go "no sugar". NO CHOICE! Which I think will really help me do that too. I noticed that when I had eaten frosted shredded wheat cereal I just couldn't stop eating at 1 cup. I went back for a second small bowl.

Benefits: zero physical cravings--a few mental "lite" ones but relatively easy to ignore. Blood glucose readings 2 hours after eating -104 mg/dl. Even better! When I went to my follow up eye appointment to check on my new contacs this is what my eye doctor said: I have the vision of a 40 year old. I will be 58 in July. I told him, you know I am almost 60. He said Yes I know but my vision has improved! I can see 20/20 with my contacs in. I was having blurred vision 15 months ago because of my elevated blood glucose. My Dad has macular degeneration. No cure but you can prevent it by ....drum roll, eating dark vegetables! What is macular degeneration? You get a dark black spot in the center of your vision. All you have to see is your peripheral vision. I love to see the world around me. My eyes are worth this!

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Old 05-04-2011, 10:40 PM   #34
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Aakkk - I lost my post. (I usually write in word perfect)

Hi... today was better. I am grateful. I wrote down all I ate and kept track of my exchanges.

Thanks so much for your support.
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Old 05-04-2011, 10:55 PM   #35
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Hi Coaches!

I moved through many stresses today and managed to stay OP by remembering I HAD to say NO CHOICE. A long story, but I visited my father and grandmothers grave sites today...unmarked and not spoken about for years. I discussed w/mom yesterday and she put me off...again. I decided today, that I was grown up and didn't need permission to contact public works and ask them to measure and mark. It was one of those days where I just knew that if I strayed from my plan it would be with a gusto that would eradicate lots and lots of hard work. *credit* Today I recognized the perfect setup for unplanned eating....usually I just snap and start eating before I can even think it through. Exercise was hauling recycle, yard work and cemetery walking. Oh, and dinner was a from scratch Sweet Potato, Lentil and Spinach Curry. It was most excellent and a real reward for making it through this day unscathed.

BillBlueEyes, yay for OP eating on a day where one could easily "justify" unplanned eating. I am amazed at the scope of your sort and pack.

onebyone, it was fun to hear about your trip, especially dinner with the astronaut! It's great that you're ready to focus on your food again. Sending you supportive thoughts.

ChefJoona, great insight regarding hunger VS non-hunger. *credit* for using that insight to get through your hardest time of day.

gardenerjoy, Day 19, Stop Fooling Yourself...I agree, some of the thoughts are insidious. I think my craziest is "one bite won't matter." The problem with me is that one bite almost always leads to many more. BTW-your new fav meal sounds yum!

maryann, yay for a new juicer! I juiced for years until I got my vita mix-now I pulperize.lol Apple carrot was always my fav!

pamatga, your statement, "I knew that the truth was better than "fooling myself" was so powerful. Yeah, nothing to change it. *credit* for moving on in a positive way. I also wrote down "avoidance is avoidance." I relate, it seems that in my life avoidance just helps the dysfunction to shift.

ETA-Beverlyjoy, we crossposted...thanks for checking in and reporting a much better day today. I think "rain or shine" posting is really helpful.

Keep on truckin' everyone. We have the tools and we can do this!
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Old 05-05-2011, 07:18 AM   #36
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Did I beat BBE in posting first thing today? Briefly, I did Day 21-Weigh on the Scale I have lost 4 lbs since last Friday when I re-committed my weight lose efforts with Beck which I now call my "Beck Plus Diet".

I would like to say that things are better or , at least, different but they are not. I do appreciate your positive feedback on how I am handling being up like a vampire (or 3rd shift worker) and some sleeping during the day. I was so frustrated last night around 9 pm that I just whimpered to my DH. "I just want this to stop, God". My stomach hurt from taking so much medicine. The dark circles under my eyes even alarmed me when I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. I couldn't even really cry although I felt a lot of emotion welled up in my throat. All I can say is right now I feel in a really weird place. I am eating when I should be sleeping and, well, then eating a lot of raw fruits n vegetables for what should be dinner time so I can stay within my calorie range.

I took a bold step and ordered my first 5 lb lose pair of shoes. Although I have lost 4 lbs by the time the shoes arrive here, I should have lost the other 1 lb. A very pretty dressier sandal, Jones New York leather upper wedge heeled, from DSW site. I was actually nervous (me nervous shopping?) because I knew how special these shoes would be. They will always signify a mini goal met. I was actually overwhelmed with the choice of what one pair would stand out for me to choose. Then, thinking, what pair will I choose next 5 lbs.

Did anyone else do this 5 lb reward task? How did it make you feel? I feel honored, responsible for my own decisions and determined to not regain. What do you do if you regain? Put the reward back?

I did 2 Response Cards for weighing in. I do weigh with the correct mindset as Dr. Beck mentioned. I see it as one more piece of information that tells me how I am working my "program". There are only 3 things that make me regain previous weight lose: 1) I ate too many calories 2) TOM 3) increased sodium.

The more I read this book the more I am determined to do this. Dr. Beck has definitely given me my belief back.

I read what you wrote. I will comment tomorrow. Love and peace

P.S. That is a heart -shaped potato. I found that picture on a public photography website.

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Old 05-05-2011, 07:41 AM   #37
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Thumbs up Thursday

Diet Coaches/Buddies - I have contracted the movers to take our furniture away for the three months of the renovation. CREDIT moi for doing the necessary. Makes it ever more real. Eating was OP, CREDIT moi - one more dinner made from the Easter ham; I love, love, love leftover ham eaten with too much Trader Joe's coarse ground mustard.

Did gym, CREDIT moi, trying again to work with dumbbells heavier than I've ever lifted before, and, again, not being able to but pleased that I'm willing to try. A nice guy volunteered to spot for me when I suggested he watch his feet since I was likely to drop them.


onebyone - Yep, sounds like your mental health needs a new scale.

Joy (gardenerjoy) - This is the one that tries to sneak under my radar: "I'm upset, and I just don't care."

Beverlyjoy - Sending supportive thoughts as well as empathy for the lost post. I just had two computer crashes and I typing fast as I can to get out for a 7am bird walk.

Debbie (Lexxiss) - Kudos for working past your mother's resistance to the gravesites.

maryann - Yay for a juicer to sneak veggies into the unwary, LOL. Kudos for "I will practice moderation."

ChefJoona - Kudos for focusing on the basic Beck skills.

pamatga - Your plan, "no sugar". NO CHOICE! seems like a good path.


Readers -
Quote:
chapter 3
Get Ready to Lose

Before you start, however, I would like you to do the following 10 essential tasks.
task 6
Make a Memory Box
As you progress through Stage I and beyond, be on the lookout for these positive experiences:

  • When you suddenly notice you are rarely experiencing cravings

Judith S. Beck, Ph.D, The Complete Beck Diet for Life (Green book), pg 38.
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Old 05-05-2011, 07:54 AM   #38
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Yesterday was filled with landmines...on the road during lunch time... work celebration when I returned to the office, candy bowl sitting next to my desk.... invitation to join friends at a new restaurant for Restaurant week (try a place for a reduced price- I think BillBE has talked about the one in Boston).
I fared pretty well. Had two jelly beans from the candy bowl, planned out what I had at the work celebration and the restaurant. Not a day to lose weight, but not to gain it either.

Tonight I am having dinner at my parent's. I don't know what they'll be serving, but I know it will have healthy enough choices to make it a good meal. Food is planned and packed for the rest of the day.

pamatga Thank you for the PM poem! I will say I am not a very spiritual person, but those words are very helpful to me right now. Interesting about what Jillian Michael's said on Leno... I have never actually seen an episode of Biggest Loser, but she is a drill sargent in the Shred DVD! I haven't done the tape since Monday and I still ache in my quads.

Thinking of you all!
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Old 05-05-2011, 09:32 AM   #39
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Morning Coaches/Buddies!

I had a Very Bad Day on Tuesday and Wednesday was just a little better. I have my new dosage of antidepressants now and I am hopeful that things are stabilizing, but eating was just not good. I am OK now and plan to stay OP today.

I know I'm quite behind with personals and I apologize. I will try to get back to them tomorrow. Depression really bites. It has run in my family for generations in various forms and I'm just grateful that the medications have improved so much since I was first diagnosed in the mid-90s. I know I'm not alone in this group and I send (((hugs))) of solidarity to everyone else who is suffering.

I have kept up with my Beck reading and am on Day 32 - Prepare for Travel. I'm not travelling anywhere until July but will reread this before I go. Excellent suggestions.

Feliz Cinco de Mayo
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Old 05-05-2011, 09:53 AM   #40
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Hello friends:

I have been on a downward spiral virtually all of April. The month consisted of: eating, not exercising, eating, sabotoging thoughts such as "I can't do this, I give up" dominating my thinking, eating, stress, eating and very painful ankles and feet.

I now weigh more than I did 18 months ago when I started. It is very hard not to give up. However reality is that if I don't lose weight, at my age of 49, with a horrible family history of strokes, cancer, heart attacks I am going to have an increasingly terrible time health wise. I feel terrible. The only thing that is going to help the ankle and foot pain, caused by arthritis, is to lose weight.

So here I am. I know what to do- plann, post, exercise, stay positive, read the cards. I have devised a new eating plan based on the Beck green book and am going to aim for 1600 calories a day and see if I can stablalize there. I packed lunch for today and planned dinner. The only thing is to just do it.

Thanks to you for listening.
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Old 05-05-2011, 11:01 AM   #41
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One of my new Advantages cards says "I want to wake up each day hungry and energetic." I've been allowing myself, every couple of weeks, one slice of pizza from Whole Foods. But, I wake up the next day feeling bloated and disgusting. I find it very difficult to give up treats that my brain has determined is reasonable in moderation even when my body is saying it's not. It's not fair! But I'm giving it up anyway. I deserve to feel better than this in the morning.

Day 20: Get Back on Track
This is the one where we learn that one bad choice is not to be used as an excuse for eating whatever I want for the rest of the day (or week, or month). "It's destructive to continue to eat in an unplanned way for the rest of the day just because you ate something that wasn't on your food plan."
Was it in the green book or somewhere else that I read the traffic light analogy? If I were given a ticket for running a red light, would I say "well, I've blown it, I might was well run every red light on the way home" ? Of course, not. I would be careful at red lights on the way home and for many weeks into the future. It makes no more sense to eat in an out of control way in response to one slip. That analogy cured me of this problem.

WI: NAkgs, Exercise: +90* 210/1200 minutes for May, Food: 90%op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes
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Old 05-05-2011, 06:21 PM   #42
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Hey all,

Checking in. I found a diet buddy! My best friend since kindergarten who now lives in a different city, but we are supporting each other via email. We have a weekly weigh-in and we post our food journals. Talk about being accountable!

I haven't exercised - love to walk outdoors, but the weather here has been nothing but nasty. I have been very good with eating healthy and watching portions and have dropped 1.5 of that regained weight. So although my ticker is still not accurate, I am only .5 lbs. over what it says I am.

Kris
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Old 05-05-2011, 08:48 PM   #43
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Angry bummed.

Hi Coaches

I am full of self-recrimination tonight. In Ottawa, right now, the reception for the City Hall art show that has my giant print in it is happening. I got a letter from my city councillor in the mail yesterday congratulating me on my accomplishment. The mayor and all the mucky-mucks are there right now not to mention the other artists. And I am not there. I am so bummed.

So, this back pain kept me away.

Yesterday, after a good day, I went out driving for 2 hours and walking around for 2 hours, made dinner, picked up DH and then watched tv and all of a sudden the back just went back to hurting a lot like it was the first night I hurt it. Not sure what I did. I guess I overdid it. Anyway there was no way I could go to Ottawa today for the reception.

I tell you what I am honestly thinking:

if you weren't so fat your back wouldn't have been hurt and you would have been at the reception. This is your fault for not losing weight. This is the price you are paying. Have you learned your lesson yet?


Lying on the couch, with it being hard to even turn onto my side, I had the thoughts of gee... could the paramedics lift me out of here if I got worse? And the mechanics of getting up when you are heavy are something else.

I used to suffer from anxiety and panic attacks when I was younger. I was agoraphobic for a while. I remember how much every little victory, every day I went out, every time I stayed in a line up at a store without running out, every time I got thrrugh the panic on a bus, how much every little victory meant to me. Eventually I got to speaking in public, doing art shows internationally and all that. Small steps lead to big changes. Consistency and time are all you need. Stick to the plan as DH reminds me all the time. It occurs to me that I need to apply that same resolution, that same determination and gut level NO! I REFUSE TO LIVE LIKE THIS! energy to where I am at today. I deserve more than a bad back and a life spent worrying about hurting myself because I won't look after myself. Hello?
Not being able to go to my opening tonight may have been the wake up call
that really truly wakes me up.

Thanks for reading coaches.
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Old 05-05-2011, 10:05 PM   #44
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Hi everyone:

onebyone- let's go baby!!!!

I am very grateful today that I stayed on plan. I needed this day!!

Credit today for:

-packing lunch
-weighing in
-doing weights
-checking in with my coaches
-planning tomorrow and packing up lunch
-eating healthy and on plan- breakfast (egg whites and cheese), snack (yogurt and strawberries), lunch (tuna sandwich and big salad), and dinner (hamburger on a whole wheat bun and veggies). Snack tonight will be a bit of cereal.

Hope everyone has a great day tomorrow.

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Old 05-05-2011, 10:27 PM   #45
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Hi Coaches!

My food was planned and I stayed with my plan.*credit* No major temptations today. Exercise was weeding at my moms and disassembling a four poster bed, hauling it down a circular staircase and into our car and then back out again and up another set of stairs. Mental exercise was planning the big clean out of my Grandmothers house next week in time for the community yard sale.

BillBlueEyes, what, exactly, does the 3 month renovation entail? We have several of those just waiting for the right time. You've got me thinking about the ham in my freezer but I'm trying to stay low sodium this week.

pamtanga, *credit* for staying with your plan when you are in so much pain. I'm remembering when I hurt so bad and I just kept remembering that every 5# I could lose would take so much more stress off my joints. I thought I would need so much surgery and miraculously, dropping the weight was enough. I did not do the 5# reward, specifically, but I do tend to reward myself in consistent ways just reminding myself it's a big deal to maintain my losses so far. I did regain about 10# between Oct and Feb. On Feb 18 I said NO CHOICE it has to come off, and it has. I would suggest not putting a reward back but just to remain vigilant. It is there that the commitment to take it off and keep it off is found.

ChefJoona, a day of maintenance when there are so many food activites sounds just fine. Two jelly beans is a big deal!

Erika(eusebius), credit for getting right back on track. I noted the capitalization, Very Bad Day. I hope your new medication helps.

CeeJay, good to see you. 300 was the line in the sand for me. (my scale stopped being accurate at 275). I wish I would have had the support of 3FC to take off the first 50. It would have been much easier if I could (and would have) checked in every day. In retrospect, I think the checking in has been the single most important change for me. For me, it means the bad days don't turn into weeks. I send you strength for your journey. ETA-Yay for an OP day!

gardenerjoy, kudos for accepting that the Whole Foods pizza is no longer in your repertoire. It's not in mine, either. Fortunately there are so many super healthy choices available.

Kris(greyhenry), great that you persisted in finding a great friend to share coaching with. Yay for eating healthy, too.

onebyone, you have proven that you can persist to victory in many other aspects of your life. I think you have hit your "own nail" on the head, stating "Small steps lead to big changes. Consistency and time are all you need."
__________________
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My last 58 pounds lost on SBD My 2014 Beacher Bio!

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