Thank you for all the kind words about my sudden job loss! I really appreciate it. Today I walked 10,900+ steps, credit. Tracked my food, credit, and under my calorie goal, credit. Had the kids size water ice when dh and I went for a snack--I'm finally listening to myself and not ordering something larger. Water ice loses its charm for me pretty quickly if I get anything above a kids size, even though the sabotaging thought says, "It's a treat. You *need* to get something bigger."
I spent time in the studio, yay! I also checked out a knitting group that meets during the day, which was a lot of fun, and gave me some human contact.
Shepherdess--yay for getting ready for a marathon! That is very cool. Kudos for gleaning some salads from your garden.
Gardenerjoy--I agree that it's good to have both life activity and exercise in a day. I feel so much better when I get up and do something.
New2--Credit for your new work out and giving your heart some exercise!
Houston--I hear you on the self-criticism. It's one of my biggest challenges. I am glad you had the courage to be honest! You are getting yourself acclimatized to normal human stuff that the critical voice freaks out about. You ate some pizza--entirely human and nothing about you as a person or your worth. The worst for me is when I criticize myself for criticizing myself--I am learning to step back and notice the pattern. It's like nesting dolls--one criticism nested inside another nested inside another.
Beverlyjoy--You are doing so well with the surgery decision process! Health anxiety is one of my struggles, and I think you are so smart to take a break from the internet research--there comes a point when you realize there is no site called "Beverlyjoy's exact health issue solution"--and that the more research you do, the more anxious you get.
Bill--Kudos for walking in spite of the heat and staying hydrated! Thanks for saying I sound sane--I feel surprisingly sane, which may be shock, or may actually be sanity. . .
Today was a good food day! As always, now, lots of spontaneous exercise. I got to sit down to an enjoyable OP dinner and check in with everyone.
BillBlueEyes, I wasn't aware that corn has very little nutritional value. Blueberries are healthier and tastier, too.
Nuxmaga, I was cheered to hear that you had a good day! for getting out for some human contact!
FutureFitChick, I hope you are feeling better.
Shepherdess, good to hear from you! BTW-I'm a marginal gardener but I enjoy it!
gardenerjoy, lol for not counting gardening exercise even when it IS exercise! Answering your question, it will probably be just as busy when my family comes but it will be nice to see everyone and I ?? may have a little bit more flexibility.
Houston2, no big deal, just move on. I find it really helpful to take the emotion out of unplanned eating AND scales. Thanks for trusting us!
Donna (new2me2), good job staying OP and being open to tweaking when necessary!
Beverlyjoy, *credit* for vigilance during stressful times. I, too, am amazed how my emotional response always has to do with food. BTW I haven't gotten to say congrats on onederland. I was estatic and still am
Cheryl (seadwaters) I am encouraged every day when I read your posts. You mentioned not sure why the large scale drops-perhaps it is *credit* to you for working so hard at it!
Woodland, always nice when your drop by! Yes, Beck skills do quiet that part of life that used to be constantly appearing.
maryblu, I think you hit the nail on the head about having control of eating when everything else is spinning in every direction. It is very empowering!
Ok, I need to get a few hours of sleep. I set the alarm for checking on my Mom. I know I didn't say hi to everyone, but know I read every word every day!
ETA-Got a few and am enjoying some early morning peace and quiet. I had mentioned I was reading Women Food and God, by Geneen Roth. I came across two powerful statements I thought I would share; "Change happens when you understand what you want to change so deeply that there is no reason to do anything but act in your own best interest." and "The biggest obstacle to any kind of transformation is the voice that tells you it's impossible."
Went to the Farmers Market and bought meat for the week and veggies - now I can plan food for the week. I also bought some plants and herbs - very minor because I can only grow in pots on the deck which is the only place I get enough sun. A lot of the herbs do better in winter and don't bolt to seed. The sort of things that I can cut the odd leaf off for dinner - rainbow chard, English spinach, rocket (arugula), mint, bok choy etc. Hope they grow.
My weight was up again today - by 2 pounds! This is why I can't congratulate myself that the drop was to do with virtuous activity because it just seems to be all over the place. It is driving me nuts
BeverlyJoy - Credit for recognising emotional eating and stopping! I can see how the websites could freak you out. I think there is such a thing as too much information LOL - maybe you could just trawl for relevant info about rehab, and resources, and supports needed. The rest might be best left as a mystery. I am paying myself! I will transfer the money made from credits once per month and from 5 pounds as it happens (convincingly) . This will be one good wardrobe (but I am robbing Peter to pay Paul). I always mean to budget for a wardrobe and never do it - so now I am.
BillBlueEyes - Credit for walking in the heat and taking the opportunity to have a splash - I bet the kids thought that was interesting. I discovered I have a thing about corn - love fresh corn but discovered it is a grain and I am avoiding grains for a bit (sort of an elimination diet to see what happens). And I cleaned out the cupboards. The only real grains I had were all corn. I gave it all to the little girls who walk the dogs - 3 lots of microwave popcorn, a multi pack of 6 bags corn chips, a multi pack of 10 popcorn, and some corn tortillas! Weird - this will solve my junk food problem no end.
AND I noticed cherries at the supermarket - for half the usual price of local ones - and they were from the US. They taste AMAZING - there must be some sort of glut or something. They have never tasted like this
Debbie (Lexxiss) - Glad you could drop by and glad you are having a good food day. Hope things with your patients are OK
Donna (new2me2) - You are doing well with exercise to burn that many calories. I will have to learn how to use my heart monitor watch - I am sure it could be useful. Hope your weigh-in is OK.
Gardenerjoy - Doing well - you make me think about exercise and consistency
Houston2Command - Thank you for being brave and being honest with yourself and us - it makes it easier for all of us to be honest and also to bear witness to each others efforts. I imagine all of us have something to "confess" each day - and Beck has taught me that it is important to note it, tell it to my coaches, and to move on and forgive myself. Whenever I hide it from myself I go into a downward spiral, stop weighing myself and effectively give up. Hang in there
Nuxmaga - You do sound really sane - and composed. And your exercise seems to be staying on track too. Impressive I'd say
Shepherdess - Good to read your post - sounds like things are hectic. Hope you get the control you want/need but you seem to be handling it. Yay for home grown salads
Credits - - I motivated myself by reading A&R cards - NO - Consciously gave credit for positive eating / exercise behaviours - yes - Limit junk food to once per day - Yes - $1 - Made food plan - Yes - $1 - Logged food soon after eating - yes - $1
- Food on-plan - Yes except for spontaneous cherry eating
- Posted to the list - Here I am
- Ate seated every time - No (cherries)
- Ate mindfully and slowly - sort of
- Put down fork occasionally - not that I remember - Weighed myself - Yes - UP 2#! - 216.6 - $1
- Drank water - YES - Exercise - Nope - and my body needs a rest
TALLY (only red ones earn money!) - DAY = $4; Week = $39; Grand Total = $39
Diet Coaches/Buddies - Realized that I would be satisfied with only half my pork chop at dinner last night. But, there wouldn't be a work lunch I could take the leftovers to until Monday, so I ate the whole thing. Ouch. I'm really slow here at just leaving food on my plate. Either it's the "starving children in China" or just my frugal nature, but it seems like an unacceptably huge waste. Think I'll have to revisit the Beck chapter with the exercise for leaving food. But CREDIT moi for on-plan eating.
While eating dinner on the patio, DW was puzzled by a lone bird at the peak of a tall evergreen tree some two houses over. It never moved. Finally, after dinner, she got her binocs and saw it to be a Cedar Waxwing. Super treat! We don't get to see them as yard birds.
Margaret (Nuxmaga) - Big Kudos for going right out and finding a knitting group that meets during the day. Yep, knowing that you sound sane is a clear indication that you are.
Joy (gardenerjoy) - Yay for having so many exercise minutes that you don't need to count all that gardening work out.
Shepherdess - Yay for having many weight lifting chores to build your strength as well as regularly running to build your cardio-vascular and endurance. You're doing a lot of workouts. Kudos for recognizing that your eating will have to adjust when this phase changes. I have a lifetime image of all the high school football stars just ballooning after their final season. Thanks for letting me know that my land is still available; I still have some juggling of finances to find the spare $125M, LOL.
Beverlyjoy - Thanks for Remember, corn is what they feed pigs to fatten them up. - I'll try that one when the urge is strong. Yep, "It is a daily process." I, too, wish it'd just go away but I'd eat and exercise on-plan with no effort.
Cheryl (Seadwaters) - That's a great bunch of plants and herbs to be able to tend from your deck. Monster Kudos for giving the neighborhood girls your stash of snacks - all rather amazingly corn-centric. Glad we're shipping you guys something as healthy as cherries.
Debbie (Lexxiss) - Yay for staying op on your schedule. Thanks for the Geneen Roth quotes - she's always so inspiring.
Donna (new2me2) - Yep, 415 calories is an awesome workout - you must have felt great. Yay for "phooey on the points and eat what I need to."
Houston2Command - One of the things that the Beck strategies helps me with is avoiding huge feelings, like shame, about eating off-plan. I remember playing high school football; we'd lose yardage on a play and just get up determined to do better on the next play. That's the attitude I'd like to learn about my eating instead of having stuff when my eating loses a few yards on a play. Kudos for honestly facing what you're doing.
day 32 Prepare for Travel
Making a Travel Plan
. . .
Using any one of these strategies might cause a small weight gain (assuming your splurges aren't too big), which is reasonable and certainly much better than gaining a lot of weight. You'll feel better about yourself if you decide in advance that this is what you want to do. You won't feel very good if you try not to gain weight, eat more than you'd planned, and end up gaining weight anyway.
The Beck Diet Solution, pg 223-224.
New Journey: 10 years
In maintenance phase: 8 years and 6 months
Following Dr. Judith Beck via 3FC's Beck Diet Solution Forum: 8 years
Hi folks... I'm dismally slow at getting to this list and getting my Beck plan in high gear. Still down 5 pounds, have good morning routines and breakfast choices all habitual now. Lunch is usually okay, snacks too, but dinner and after dinner eating are still my downfall. Dinner just continues too long. And I do drink wine. Soooo, time to start counting those calories and making it a choice, not just pouring what I think is a "drink". And seriously planning dinner.
Had an interesting stressful 2 days and didn't overeat. My horse got away from me and my friend while deep in the woods. We had stopped and dismounted to saw a log that was chest high across the trail. The horses were fine and relaxed then all of a sudden hers bolted down the trail, and mine pulled herself free and went too, dragging her rope. We found her horse, but not mine, and I had to come back out the next day with a friend to look for the mare. Luckily we found her, but had to cut her free of rope reins and saw big brush and limbs out so she could move. She's fine. It took an hour to free her after we finally found her. It was pretty tense for me... but I didn't eat much, actually less than usual - and forgot to eat lunch the day we found her. Hum, that means there's a sandwich somewhere in my car or trailer. Could be yucky after a few days in the heat.
I did stacks of paperwork yesterday. Ordinarily, in that situation, I play games of solitaire to reward myself for tasks completed. Yesterday, I used the Wii Walk It Out game instead. Several short bursts of exercise gave me more energy throughout the day than sitting all day! Who knew?
WI: -0.85kg, Exercise: +60 700/1800 minutes for July, Food: 90%op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes
ponee: what a relief that you found your horse safe and sound
BillBlueEyes: love the football analogy to the ouches of our eating life
seadwaters: yep the scale will drive you crazy if you let it. Are you graphing your weight? It helps me to see the long term trend even on days when I get an unexplained gain.
Lexxiss: glad you got a chance to sit down for time of your own. Thanks for the inspiring quotes!
Nuxmaga: great job with all your credits. I, too, am finding kids' sizes are plenty for summer treats. But, man, that sabotaging thought is a tough one to get past. It's starting to get easier, though, as it becomes habit.
Shepherdess: my garden survives on neglect sometimes, too. I felt better when I visited one of our CSA farms and realized that weeds get the better of them, too. For the most part, the stuff we want will grow right alongside the weeds. Watering is the one thing I really have to keep up on in July and August.
Thanks everyone for your information about caloric intake. It really helps to have people to run things by.
I've been gone and busy the last couple of days. Feeling a little overwhelmed with life. I co-own a business and I just found out yesterday that my main sales rep is putting in her two week notice. I'm happy for her. It's a good job with benefits-- can't turn those jobs down in this climate. In a way it's a good thing because I now have the opportunity to change my sales program to work better for the company.
I'm still in Stage One of the eating plan (Green Book) and realize that I want to stay here a little bit longer. I'm a great one for rushing things and I know that when I do, I skimp on some things.
My current Goals:
Plan my meals in advance
Log calories every day
Check-in every day
Take my vitamins 2x a day
Read response and advantages cards
Eat sitting down
Exercise twice a day
Always have water/tea ready to drink
Give myself credit
I'm too pooped and behind to catch up with each of you. But, thank you for all your support! Will try to peak thorough this weekend and catch up!
Good morning Beck friends! I'm not sure how it happened but the WW scale showed I lost .2 pounds since last week. I can't see how it's possible that my scale showed a slight gain and theirs showed a slight loss, lol, but that didn't stop me from doing the happy dance right then and there in front of everyone! Really, I did. I think my co-workers know I'm a little whacko but that just confirmed it, lol.
Houston2Command I don't any of us would ever judge you or anyone else for something we've all done ourselves! Don't even feel ashamed to say what you need to. You should give yourself a huge credit for posting about it. EXCELLENT for recognizing the negative self-talk and for doing something about it!
gardenerjoy Yeah, I like having the spontaneous exercise and the formal exercise both in my life. The spontaneous is usually more fun anyway, lol.
Shepherdess Major credit for recognizing an anti-Beckian behaviour and for trying to fix it before it becomes a problem!
Nuxmaga Major credit for getting the kid size treat! And yay for finding a great knitting group!
[b]Lexxiss[/] Glad you got some rest! Very powerful statements from Geneen Roth!
seadwaters (Cheryl) Having some good things on hand should make your meal planning a lot easier in the coming week! I really do like using my heart rate monitor...it's very informative. I've heard many times to use perceived exertion as a guide to how hard you're working out, but I found that for me it really isn't. I usually feel like I'm working out harder than I actually am, lol. Seeing my heart rate right there in front of me lets me know that.
BillBlueEyes I still have a hard time leaving food on my plate. I get around that by only cooking what I intend to eat, but in doing that I'm not really addressing the problem of what to do when I DO have more food on my plate than I want to eat.
ponee How scarey about your horse, I'm glad everything worked out okay in the end! Major credit to you for not overeating with all the stress!
gardenerjoy Super major credit for using Walk It Out as a reward!!!! Yay, and I say again, Yay!
AmberPr Major credit for finding a positive in a not so positive situation!!
Hi beck folks, coaches, buddies…yesterday was a very healthy day - I am always grateful for that! I stayed true to my plan very well - credit. I have been very aware again of not licking my fingers or cooking utensils again. Credit.
I spoke with the surgeon’s nurse for 25 minutes with questions. I feel much more informed about what will happen, what I can expect, time line of recovery, things I need to have when I come home, how long I'll need to have someone taking care of me, etc. It is very overwhelming to think about what they are going to do and the long recovery. I will have to take it a day at a time.
Today is hanging with DH. I like that. We have many gardens. I am not allowed to walk on the grass because of my ankle. So, I guided (bossed) him around the garden the best I could to have him do some weeding and primping - from afar.
plan/log/measure - yes
count my calories - yes
put fork down between bites - some of the time
slow mindful eating - some of the time
really TASTE the food - a lot of the time
leave a small bite of food - all the time
lots of water - yes
exercise - no
meditation - no
no second helpings - all the time
eat seated only - all the time
give myself credit when I do things right - yes
say Oh Well to any unfairness I might feel - no
Amberpr - you have a good list of daily goals. I totally agree about taking the new daily tasks at the rate you are most comfortable. I believe most people do this too.
gardener joy - credit for using your Wii and that it gave you extra energy during the day - a wonderful by product of exercise.. Isn’t it nice to not even ‘need’ to count gardening in your total because you’ve been doing so much!
Ponee - it’s good to realize how important planning is in the long run for sane living with food. I am glad you got through some extra stress and not eating about. So glad you found the horse and that ended up well.
Billbe - sorry about the pork chop incident - the ‘starving children’ thing is hard to let go of. If I faced with a bigger meat portion at home….I cut it in half before it goes to the table. At a restaurant is harder, though. (Dr. Beck says to cut it in half and move it over to the other side of the plate - I call that the 'no access zone) Cedar Waxwing…Nice!
Seadwaters - CREDIT for getting to the farmer’s market and getting such nice veggies and herbs. You always do well when planning ahead - utilizing the weekends well. I love how you are paying yourself for new clothes!!
Lexxiss - so glad to hear that things are going well and even getting spontaneous exercise! Thanks for those good quotes.
Nuxmaga - very nice to see all those credits! All that walking is terrific! LOL - on no site for ‘Beverlyjoy’s no anxiety health issues solution’!! It’s a good reminder - thanks. Glad you checked into the knitting group.
New2me2 - I am so, so impressed with your consistent exercise - CREDIT I hope you can figure out the best food plan for yourself. I am glad you don’t have foot pain any more. Glad you had a loss at ww - happy dances are always appropriate.
Houston2command - I can totally understand and relate to the ‘honest about food issues’. It was hard for me to allow/make myself be honest here. Some times I still don't want to admitt when I binge or go crazy with food. But, truly - there is not judgement here of what happens with your eating or plan. We are here to help you the best way we can. You said - The problem is, that by not admitting it, I don't get over it, I beat myself up more, and I continue in the wrong direction. This is true - you can be honest here, really.
Shepardess - glad you could get to the internet! Grunt labor - LOL. I guess it’s keeping the calories burning. I hope you can get back to training for your run. Once things slow down to a ‘mild roar’ - hope you can get back into your food/life routine. I am glad the scale is not showing any gains despite not planning as much as usual.
Move ticker, move!
Next Mini Goal - 214
"You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it." - Margaret Thatcher
I can't lose 100 pounds....but, just maybe I can lose five pounds twenty times.
Last edited by Beverlyjoy : 07-10-2010 at 03:47 PM.
OMG, ponee, no wonder we are such kindred spirits! Another horse person. I just sold mine last year after having one for 14 years. Two different Arabians, actually. Sold when I couldn't keep him next to the park anymore. Got so spoiled riding on 14 miles of horse trails with nothing but lakes, woods, hill, and plenty of flat prairie to let is all out! Loved galloping up those hills. Still miss it, but not sure I will get back into owning again. Your adventure was my worst nightmare..never happened, but I always made sure I had comfortable boots on just in case!
Did a solo night for dancing last night. Nothing like a street dance to a good band in a town of 200 people. Pretty laid back. Ended up dancing with a gaggle of girls in a big circle. I had 20 years on most of them, 25 or more on others. Felt pretty good to be keeping up with them, especially since my ankle is still giving me fits. Still swollen, still hurts..guess that is likely to continue until I rest it. That's OK, November is coming.
Time for a Green Monster with my very own freshly picked raspberries and then a soak in the lake. .the best medicine for my poor ankle.
BillBE, interesting that a Cedar Waxwing is not so common for you. Really common here. I got to learn what a Pileated Woodpecker sounds like. One landed outside my window on a tree this morning and brought me bolt upright with his screech. I realized that I hear that alot, just didn't know what it was.
I was pouting last night about yesterday mornings weight because even though it had been going down all week for the first time it did leap an unprecedented 2 pounds. I have been graphing daily in the hope of seeing a downward trend and it had been everywhere but down. More like a see saw! But this week it had been looking DOWN except for yesterdays blip and while I don't usually obsess a girl does like to see progress
And today on weigh-in morning it was UNDER 215 - it was 214.8 - so I am taking it as down and taking credit for it!
Will check in later with today's progress but I had to change my ticker
Wasn't yesterday going to be the day that I started planning and got back on track? OK, today is the day. I was having some leftovers for lunch that I knew weren't a full lunch, but you know, I was going to figure it out when I got there. And yes, I had just identified this as a problem. So after finishing the leftovers and finding myself still hungry I just started munching away on trail mix. Saying "Oh well" to that.
I am taking lots of credit for a victory at an Italian restaraunt. My favorite dish is a gnocci with Alfredo sauce. It's so wonderful, but then disgusts me the next day when I open the leftovers box and pour off a 1/4 in of oil that has separated. So I used every kind of resistance technique and ordered something healthier. The gnocci is one of those dishes that I will allow myself occassionally, but not after an eating mishap earlier in the day. I also need to be strong enough to throw the leftovers away.
Today is a good day. We got up early and went on our historical society's treck visiting some sites along the Oregon, California, and Mormon trails and the Pony Express. I was joking with DH that we were walking the same paths as hundreds of thousands of immigrants who thought Central Wyoming was just another h*** to endure on their way to the Promise Land.
There was lots of riding in the car, but also lots of getting out and walking. And for the more spry among us, we got to scramble up the back of Independence Rock to look at the signatures inside a cave. We all packed our own lunch, which made healthy eating easy.
Right now we're at my FIL's house so DH can watch all the World Cup games he's recorded--we don't get any TV reception at our house. I'm posting right now to avoid the box of doughnuts that I've been offered several times now.
Seadwaters, every-day weigh-ins are very helpful, but they can drive you crazy if you let them. Those 2 lb bumps can be demoralizing, and a 2 lb loss can give you a false sens of security. The thing I used to remind myself when I saw unexpected gains was that it takes approximately 3500 to gain/lose 1 lb and even on my worst day I don't eat an extra 3500 cal. Kudos for waiting it out and finding good news on the scale the next day!
Maryblu, I once heard Clinton Anderson describe Arabians as a horse, just more so. They have every virtue of a horse, only more so and every problem of a horse, only more so. It takes some serious guts to love galloping hills on them. Yay for being able to out dance girls 20 yrs younger!
BeverylyJoy, great job asking all the questions about your surgery so you'll be well-prepared when it happens. And lots of credit for doing it all calmly and eating healthy while you're planning for your surgery!
New2me2, yay for an unexpected gain at the weigh-in. You deserve to celebrate! It's always nice to have some positive feedback to show for all your hard work.
AmberPr, you're smart to take the program slow. When I was starting on the Green Book, I saw that Beck suggests you stay at Stage I (and Stage II, if I remember correctly) for at least 2 weeks. I saw that as a goal, but soon realized that the real goal is getting all the skills well-established before moving on.
Gardenerjoy, yay for using exercise as a mini-reward and a way to break-up dreaded work. It's one of those things I always read about, but have a difficult time implementing. Great job actually doing it and finding it rewarding!
Ponee, yikes for losing your horse! Glad it all worked out well. Life is never dull when you're dealing with horses. Kudos for maintaining the 5 lb loss and for making your early meals a habit. Once you've established those early habits, you can tackle the more challenging ones.
BillBE, ouch for losing out to those starving children in China. Throwing away food is always a tough one and once I find the answer, I'll be sure to let you know. Thanks for the analagy of seeing dieting mishaps as losing yardage in a game. I needed a reminder that I just need to step back up to the line and find a way to get the ball back.
Lexxiss, great job staying OP while your life is so busy. I'd read a review of Women, Food and God and it looked intersting. Thanks for those great quotes. I'll have to pick up a copy.
Nuxmaga, yay for all those steps! Great job realizing that a child's size is large enough and ignoring that annoying voice that says that treats should be supersized!
Re: the major guts, Shepherdess, major guts or big time stoopid. I have to say my two guys were pretty mellow for Arabians, but they still did do the major side swing/ shying move---sometimes with an elevator drop to boot. I never did get dumped, though. Better lucky than good.
You didn't mention Arabians are also the prettiest breed by far. I now realize that every horse I ever drew as a kid was an Arabian..shorter bodied, longer legged, and that amazing deep dish that makes its head so breathtakingly beautiful. That said, my favorite breed is the Peruvian Paso. Amazingly sweet ride.
During those years I went from 165 to 220 and back down again. Can't tellya the difference in every way. When I was riding in the park two things struck me. 7 out of 8 riders were female, if not more, and more than half of them (us) were heavy. No way to know why, but it sure was true.
I walked to breakfast with a friend, though the waffle special I had was more a dessert than anything else. . .oh, well. I did walk 10,000+ steps altogether today, credit. I tracked my food, credit. dh and I resisted the urge to eat out with all the humid heat, and I made an improvised white bean, hearts of palm and roasted pepper salad that turned out quite delicious, credit.
Got a bit overwhelmed thinking of all I need to do--I want to spend as much time planning and promoting my craft business while I figure out what to do with my unemployed self. I unpacked my bags of stuff I brought back from the library where I worked--I read a pile of thank you cards that I got over the years from my library users, and felt both sad to be gone, and glad that I had helped them.
Hard to come back here with my tail between my legs, so to speak. The last month has been all about working many, many hours, lots of stress, lots of hotel stays, and slowly dropping every good habit I spent the last 8 months cultivating. I would rally for a day or two and then revert to eating lots of junk, not planning, not exercising. For me, it is all about dealing with stress by comforting myself with food. And the sad and predictable thing is living like that makes me sad, angry at myself, defeated, and above all makes me feel unwell most of the time.
Today I ate well and on plan, I exercised and did weights, I planned tomorrow and I read the response and advantage cards. Struggling to give myself credit. Struggling not to beat myself into the ground about what has been going on for the past month or so. Afraid that I won't continue doing this tomorrow.
I really need to post here and I really need to read your posts. I missed this place every day but felt too defeated to post. But here I am and it is helpful to know that most of you have been where I am. I hope it is OK if I start back here and not do personals for awhile-- I just can't find time and that also has kept me away.