Weight Loss Support - WHY is THIS HAPPENING TO ME!??!?!!?!?

12-09-2006, 01:19 PM
I feel Angry, Frustrated, and Hateful!! I have been trying to eat well for the past month and i ate well for a week than gave up and stopped, started a week later and now its a week and just today and yesterday I ATE LIKE A PIG!!! I FEEL likE I CAN NEVER EVER LOSE THIS WEIGHT!!!! I ate CHEESECAKE, Butter Tarts, and DAte Square for breakfast WHO THE **** DOES THAT!?!?!??!?!?! I FEEL ANGRY AT MY SELF AND I DONT EVEN KNOW WHY I DO THAT!!! I mean I EAT THAT RUBBISH AND THEN FEEL LIKE ****!!! I dont Know I dont think i have the right tools to lose these 25lbs!! I cant really afford to sign up for much like weight watchers or anything like that!! IF anyone can help me that would be GReat!!! ANy Help is GREAT!!! I just really want to lose about 15-20lbs bY february!!

:( :mad:

12-09-2006, 01:44 PM
Deep breath, sweetheart.

I think we've all done things like that. The first step is to just forgive yourself, then once you're calmed down, sit down and really think about why you ate those things. Were you upset? Were you restricting your calories to the point that your body was just too hungry, and pushed you into bingeing? Do you think there is some mental block or "rebellion" going on in your subconscious that keeps you from "lasting" more than a week?

The best thing you can do right now, aside from the already-mentioned forgiveness, is to take plenty of time to read this site. I would suggest actually starting with the Success Stories forum, so you can see the struggles some of our dieters have had and overcome. Most of all, know that even if you don't have the tools to lose weight right this second, you can get them HERE! We're all here and ready to support you in this.

Good luck! :hug:

12-09-2006, 02:52 PM
I agree with pp. Forgive yourself. I have found that going through the success threads/posts were such a hugh motivator! I also bought "YOU: on a diet" That book has helped A LOT.


12-09-2006, 03:19 PM
Don't be so hard on yourself! It's what you do now that matters. Do you throw in the towel or do you dust yourself off and figure out why you felt compelled to eat those things? Also I second the "You on a Diet" book, Eleny. I thought I knew everything about dieting and nutrition, but I have learned so much. It takes some of the emotion out of this whole struggle by explaining cravings and breakdowns in "willpower" and how you're not weak -- sometimes the way we deprive ourselves on diets sets us up for failure and binges.

Hang in there, Lose25! :hug: You can do this!

12-09-2006, 03:31 PM
You aren't alone in this behavior, you know. I agree with the first poster. Forgive yourself first. See if you can figure out why you do it (which is probably going to take a while)... and get right back on track!

12-09-2006, 03:41 PM
Move on. You can't keep beating yourself up over this. You have to get over it and start again, right now. The worst thing you can do is to say, I've screwed up all ready, it doesn't matter now if I eat whatever I want the rest of the day. Try to figure out where or why you went wrong, and try to prevent that from happening again instead. It would probably be a good idea if you get that stuff out of the house, if possible. Why keep them there to tempt you. Make sure you have lots of healthy choices available, so that if you get hungry or just want to eat, you can choose something good for you instead of sweets.

You can do this. Don't give up!

Tara D
12-09-2006, 03:47 PM
I would take the time to look back on yesterday. Oftentimes, when this sort of thing happens, it seems that we tend to rationalize what we're doing as we continue to eat. We make these little excuses that seem to make sense until THE NEXT DAY! We start to say things to ourselves like "Oh, just one more won't hurt -- I've already eaten a bunch" or "I deserve a treat."

I was thinking about this sort of thing this weekend, and I realized that oftentimes we make excuses to ourselves as we overeat. We've given ourselves permission to do harm to our bodies. Imagine if you had a life-threatening allergy to the cheescake. Would you have eaten it? No! This is despite however strong the craving may have been. You wouldn't eat it because you knew that it would do something negative to your body. Do people that stay away from pork because of religious reasons eat it just because it smelled really delicious that day? No! This is because they believe that they are doing some sort of harm to themselves by eating it. Do real vegetarians have a steak one day just because the odors were divine? No! This is because it counteracts their beliefs.

So, you see it's not that hard to stay away from things that you crave...This is if, and only if, you change your mindset. If you start to think of eating unhealthy things or overeating as something that harms your body/your goals in life rather than just a regular choice, you may find that it is much easier to resist things that counteract your goals. It seems that you may not have changed your mindset yet, and that may be why it was so easy to give into your cravings.

12-09-2006, 04:10 PM
Great post, Tara!


12-09-2006, 04:21 PM
I also wonder if you might be putting too much pressure on yourself. At your weight and height, trying to lose 15-20 lbs by february might be too fast to do in a healthy manner. You may be dpriving yourself too much which is triggering binge reactions as your body screams for food.

Make a sensible plan that leaves you satisfied see where it gets you. sow and steady works better than frantic

12-09-2006, 08:09 PM
Been there, done that! You have already gotten some excellent advice. I would just add that the title of your post seems a bit "victim" in nature. YOU are in control (or you can be!). Take charge of your actions.

Best wishes.

12-09-2006, 09:46 PM
Hey Its Lose25 (Beyonca)

THank you all so much for you message it is deeply appreciated, its just so hard sometimes to forgive yourslef because you feel like such a failure! and my problem is everywhere i work is a fast food place or a bake shop! its frustrating! I have been trying to lose these pounds since for ever and i dont know what to do i have failed so many times that i feel like i am yet to fail again! and about getting information on healthy eating where will i get that, in which forum? and how long did should it take me to lose those 25 lbs?. Thanks again but i did really terrible today and yesterday and i hope i can get back on track tomorrow i just absoloutely over ate and i dont even know why. I ate sweets all day and then pizza, cookies, ice cap and other rubbish! i willl try to forgive my slef! thanks again!

12-09-2006, 10:48 PM
Coming here to post and or journal is a GOOD thing.
I have gone up and down with weight for the last dozen years.
Some medical problems but nothing that would make weight loss impossible. I was frustrated because with every new book or diet revelation out there there was something lacking. I wasn't abused, I didn't "love" food, I wasn't a sad eater, mad eater etc(although I have gobbed down a handful of m&ms for no good reason, who hasn't?)
It wasn't stress related and I was even pissed off at the Oprahs and Dr Phils of the world.....Jeez guys, it isn't THAT easy....
The only thing that has consistently worked FOR ME...is to increase exercise.... a LOT.
No carb, low carb, fear of carbs, no fat, no sugar, no white food etc all did not work for me. I am Italian and love my bread. I like steak, I wil eat eggs and I will butter my toast.....
It truly is moderation. I did NS for a short while a few years ago. The best thing about that was true portions. We Americans have NO IDEA what a true portion is supposed to be. Ever see the muffins at Costco? That's three servings at least.
I do all of the things that we know we should do. Fill up on water, salads and veggies. I run and get to the gym at least 5 days a week. I incorporate weights which allow me to forgive myself a little more as far as calories are concerned ( not much).
You can do it.
Now I will fall off the wagon, I tend to in the wintertime. I have no excuse this year as I live in the South....no frigid cold hampering my walks/runs.
Good luck,

12-09-2006, 11:40 PM
I just wanted to let you know that you're not alone :hug: I definitely have had same breakfasts, lunches, dinners, snacks, and non-official meals.

I don't know how difficult it is to be surrounded by that food - do you have a space at your work where you can post little notes or leave little cards for yourself that affirm your goals and remind you of what you want to do? Or maybe look at it as a budget thing? Like every time you would definitely buy something, put that money away - you can even make or buy a container that's your own personalized piggy bank - and save up to treat yourself to something special - is there something you'd really like to do but put off because of money? Well here's your chance! And come to 3FC often, for me sometimes I stay on until a craving passes and I've reminded myself enough as to why I'm not going to give in to the craving.

Good luck - you can do it!! :D

12-10-2006, 10:28 PM
I really am trying! and even now i dont what why i mess up! i have just been trying to lose this weight since september and i have failed over and over agaiN! Its frustratinG! i dont know why i eat either. I was doing good for a week and then the weekend came and i screwed up! :( I ate more than 3000 calories in one day this week! and i really hope i can get back on track tomorrow!

12-11-2006, 07:16 AM
are you journaling? try to journal your food and your feelings when you are eating. are you bored, tired, anxious, stressed? Soon you will see your patterns and your triggers. Then you can work on not giving in to the triggers.

12-11-2006, 11:17 AM
I second the journalling advice, maybe if you plan ahead what you are going to eat? Log it in Fitday, then try and stick to it. I find it essential for myself to bring my own food with me every day at work. I don't have to make any scary choices when I'm hungry, I just eat what I brought. Saying no to special stuff people bring in like donuts or cookies or whatever is another story, I like to read the nutritional info of whatever it is, usually I decide it isn't worth it. You can do this, you are not alone!!! Check the Whole foods (http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=209)forum for healthy eating tips.

12-11-2006, 08:53 PM
GOsh I messed up Today again:(! For the past four days i have been eating non-stop! Maybe i should just let it all out! I think iam tired! I am tired of life and everything else. I Am only 18 years old but i do so much. I work 6 times a week and on top of that i go to school full time. Iam usually up 6am in the morning and i leave my house at 7am to walk to school which is an hour walk even in the winter. Then right after school i go to work till 8 or 9 then i walk back home an hour and usually iam home again around 10 and this is my week. on weekends i dont really have a weekend i work on friday from 3 ro 3am then on saturday i wake up at 7am to go to my second job sometimes i will seelp when iget home and go to my other job again at 4pm and well i work again the next day. Other times iam up 4am to drive my mom to work using my brothers car. i alway feel tired and i dont think there has been on day where i wasnt feeling tired. On top of doing all that i sometimes have to help my siblings with their homeowkr or putting them to bed. I think the main problem is that iam so very tired and sick of being the mother. I for once wish and pray that my mother was the mothe and not me. I am sick of telling my little sister what to do and when to be grounded and most of all i am just sick of been full of hate. i never and rarly show my emotions i dont feel as if iam in my own skin, but rather like iam watching my life from a distant. BUt the worst thing is i still dont feel like iam doing much. I always feel like if anything in my family goes wrong then iam the one who has to pick up the pieces and put it back together and believe me i have done it many times. I want to move away from my family but something is holding me back and i dont know what it is. All i know for now is that iam unhappy and i want to deal with it but i know this sounds shallow but my biggest priority right now is to lose these 30lbs. Because having none of your clothes fit you is just another sadness added to the loads. I think i probably said too much i guess like evryone says tomorrow is a new day and i should start again! i just wish i had someone who would tell me what to eat and give me a simple menu for a week to follow really simple! Again thank you all for your support.

Xox K

12-11-2006, 10:53 PM
Holy crap, girl!!! You need a hug!!! :hug: I'm so sorry your life is so stressful...is there someone close to you you can talk to that will just let you vent? Like an aunt or a teacher? It's so hard to help from the virtual world.

As for an easy list of just eat this stuff kind of thing, go and look at Fitday for some of the people in the Whole Foods forum or the Maintainer's forum...or there are books, try this sticky (http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=91330) from the Whole Foods forum.

Maybe try and find ways to cut back on your work hours? Ya gotta take a break sometime.

12-12-2006, 03:55 PM
Thank You all for your support. I still havent got back on my diet i have been eating terribly! its always like this for me it takes forever to get back on a diet or even a healthy way of eating. I dont know i was thinking of taking hypnosis classes. has anyone ever taken it? and chick in the hat i saw your picture and yuo look amazing! How did you do it? and in how long did you lose that much amount of weight?

Ps. I hope i can get back on this eating healthy soon :(

anyways i g2g to work
xoxo to all

12-12-2006, 04:23 PM
Sounds like you are getting overwhelmed - don't fall into the trap of "perfection." Just concentrate on making some small changes at first. Make a plan to eat a healthy breakfast every day for a week. Pick something quick, easy, unprocessed and portable and go buy enough for all 7 days. Get in the habit of making and eating your healthy breakfast - aim for around 300 calories for breakfast and include some sort of protein. Do it for 2 weeks.

After making breakfast a habit, move on to lunch. Then dinner, then snacks. Little steps, it is a big thing to do all at once.

Make sure you eat ENOUGH. I always always always binged when I restricted too much, then I hated myself. Once I gave myself permission to actually eat a healthy number of calories every day (in my case 1400-1600) I quit binging completely. It was like a miracle.

12-13-2006, 11:46 AM
Its me again! and nope havent got back on that diet yet! Iam so tired these days icant even stand for very long! My working hours have gone up to 42 hours a week + full time school so its going to be a pretty bad month. I had a huge fight with my mom this morning first i was woke up late and had to like walk run to my internship program which was a 45 minute walk that i made into less than half an hour. We had a fight because i couldnt find my balck pants or balck shoes for my waitressing job. and since shes the one who always cleans m y room she didnt know what i was talking about. I hate it when she cleans my room i always tell her not to touch it but she says she cant help it, but instead of her cleaning it she just makes a bigger mess by putting everything in the wrong place so that when i look for my things i end up making a bigger mess by messing up everything neat in order to find my things! i was just so frustrated and iam so mad at her! i cant stand her anymore i havent said i love you or even been near her in 5 years we dont hug or kiss nothing emotional the only time we interact is if she needs something other than that thats it. I think i sort of figured out why i eat its because iam tired and unhappy. I dont understand how people can get up in the morning with a smile on their faces. I have one on my face too but mine is so fake and you can tell it is. Anyways i have to go now.

Am i suppose to start a new forum everytime i write something or do i just use the old one?????

12-13-2006, 12:51 PM
Hello Lose25,

My name is Angie, and I feel your pain...I started last year and stopped after 2 months losing 15lbs. In my opinion don't look at what your not doing look at what you are doing! First look at "had to like walk run to my internship program which was a 45 minute walk that i made into less than half an hour" Look at that, you did a half and hour of excersize there, some people would have just found another way to work such as catching a ride, so look at the bright side of what you are doing...YOU ARE getting excersize in which is a great step at a better you. Like alot of the other posters here, look for insperation on this site, and if you want to try something that helps look into the Calorie Queens book, when I first started it I was like there was no way I could count my calories until I found out that I was eating 2640 calories a day to maintain my weight on 220. To wiegh 140 I have to eat about 1680, even more if I incorperate excersize. I actully found it hard to TRY and eat 1680 calories.

What I would suggest is start out slow (and some people will probly yell at me for this, but eat what you want, just in smaller portions, as your body gets used to eating less you can then start to eat better. One of the big things that you may find that work which I did was to limit the amount of soda I drink, you wouldnt believe the difference it makes. I allow myself 1 12 oz diet soda a day, either after work or with my lunch - and I hope within a few weeks to limit that to every other day then once a week because dang it like soda! I find that Diet Dr. Pepper and Diet Wild Cherry Pepsi hardly taste like diet. Somethings in a diet seem too much to handle, like using low cal or fat free dressings, in my opinion USE them, just limit how much you use! And if you do mess up as we all do make sure you excersize those extra calories, remember 1 lb of fat = 3500 calories - it sounds a lot but over the course of a week it adds up. I know it is easier said than done but as long as you keep beating yourself up the more tempted you are going to be to eat. Think about the positive - not the negative.

One motivation for me to start my weight loss plan again is the clothes I want to wear, so I have posted a whole bunch of pictures of clothes that I want to buy around to motivate me into makeing the right choices. Remember dont try to start cold turkey, remember it takes time and if you start slowly YOU CAN DO IT!!!

12-13-2006, 01:02 PM
I'm not gonna argue at all .... just eating a little less is a wonderful place to start. Calorie counting, ww points, portion control ... that's all fine tuning.

In the most basic sense, it's really just eat less and move more. Anything else is manmade confusion and individualization.

12-13-2006, 03:42 PM
Sorry to hear about the trouble with your mom. I'm kind of the opposite of you. My DD (16) does not clean her room, but unlike you, I refuse to clean it for her. Recently she lost a valuable item which I am sure is somewhere in her room, but I told her that I was not willing to help her look for it because I wouldn't know where to start. Her piles of clothes are the most disturbing (how can she know what is clean vs dirty?). When it is time for me to do laundry, she never has any in her laundry basket.....Sometimes I wish she'd respect my home, but in her words, this is her way of rebelling, so I just close her door and don't look at it.

You sure do sound like you have a lot on your plate (as it were). The stress has got to be overwhelming. But you need to understand that it can get better. Think about what you can do to change your situation and be positive about it. Life will turn around. Put a smile on your face even if it hurts. You'd be amazed at how much better things look when you have the right attitude.

12-13-2006, 04:45 PM
Hi there, Sweetie!:hug:

It's a lot that you have been dealing with these days! I commend you for trying to take on weight loss at the same time, because weight loss often seems like having ANOTHER JOB!!!

When I get really frustrated I go walking or workout. My friend years ago told me that it would really help to give me more energy AND would also clear my head so that I could think more positively. I gave it a chance and have been walking and exercising ever since! It really IS true!

It also helps to write down all of the POSITIVE things that you have accomplished and ARE accomplishing in a journal. Too often I think we spend so much time yelling at ourselves that we just forget how many great things that we have already accomplished!:cb:

Sounds like you could use a big hug! Here's one from someone who wishes she weighed as little as you do!:hug:


12-17-2006, 10:57 PM
Wow You Guys are all amazing! I was crying reading all that stuff you wrote! I still have way too much things on my plate and i find that my mom makes it all harder i come from a very culutured background and i dont ever rebel i alway listen to everything my mother says and i do it all but i think the problem is everytime i do something for her with a smile i feel like i hate her a bit more for asking me. I mean doesnt she understand that working 42 hours a week and doing school full time is a lot and on top of it i have A's in all of my classes this year except one which is a 78 but i think i just have given up trying to be make her understand because she doesnt and never will. i can understand why we would have problems if i was a bad kid but i am not and she should maybe appreciate it a little bit. I mean the only thing i dont do is clean my room but everytime i have time i do clean it. Its not like i enjoy having a messy room i myslef cant stand it but sometimes iam too exhausted to do any of that. Anyways on the brighter side i dont think i wil start college right away in Januaray instead i will start in september and just take 6 months of to work and save as all we as take time to take care of myself and relax. I was thinking of maybe moving away i have talked to my mom about it but its a huge NO NO. so that plans went down the drain but i havent given up yet i want to convince her of letting me move out for a while. I dont want the situation to get ugly. My brother said that if i moved away i should forget that i had a home which was a bit harsh. But it doesnt matter i think i would rather lose that than be unhappy. I feel like iam 50 and not an 18 year old like i am aging a year every day. But hopefully in february that will change. Like you said Cheyrel weight loss is like a second job so i have decided to quit one of my jobs once iam done school. I dont want to work till 3 to 3am every friday because i have noticed when i work that long i just become depressed and tired and i endup eating my self to death. So i told my boss the other day and he wasnt happy he was trying to convince me saying that it was only once a week. But i wont back out, i think its time i put my slef first and go out and have fun and be an 18 year old and who knows maybe get a bit drunk too LOL JK!! WOW i didnt notice but i think i have written way too much and if this was an essay maybe i would get an A + on it :).

So... anyways i have decided that i wont diet till iam done school. I havent got back on the diet and i have been eating a LOT i guess i could say iam binging but one of my best freinds whos only 18 is having huge problems with her life believe its Huge and not good either i wish i could tell you guys but its a secert for now that is, and its also taking a toll on me lets just say i want 2006 to be over ASAP and i want to start a new year.

Thanks to all again

12-19-2006, 09:00 PM
So I do think i should stop eating well i believe in the past two weeks i have gained another 10lbs and i dont want to wait until school is done anymore. so i think i will start again tomorrow. Oh ya and i got a treadmil that should be here this week or the next one it was given to me by my brothers friend. Still kind of depressed though and i have been eating a lot but now i just feel gross and discusted with myself. :(

12-19-2006, 10:02 PM
It sounds like you have a very stressful life, between work, home and school. In my view you might want to consider applying to school away from home in time for the summer or fall semester, where you can live in a dorm or something. Use that as a means of getting away from the responsibilities you have at home and just worry about getting your education. I worked 25 hours per week in college and paid the rest of my tuition and living expenses with financial aid and student loans. Just a thought mami, it sounds like a few extra pounds (which is really all you are at that height) is the least of your worries. In the meantime, think (and act) more positively! It really will have an effect on how things work out for you. For example, when you eat healthier, cut out some of your favorite unhealthy foods (even just one), or do some exercise, you should be thinking how great of a start that is toward your goal of losing weight. Everything need not happen right away. Take small steps toward changing things in your life. Make a list of your issues and brainstorm (and write down) ways to solve each issue. As long as you're working toward dealing with the issues going on in your life that need improvement, including the unhealthy eating/lack of exercise, you should be happy (but still actively working toward moving things even further along toward improvement).

12-20-2006, 04:17 PM
So i did talk to my mom about moving away and she freaked out! She had a huge issue with it but i told her that one oof my teachers is helping me find a plce to live and she kind of seemed okay with that idea since she knows my teacher and they are very good friends. I know what you mean mami its just that i dont know how to start. So i decided to brain storm some ideas and here is my probelms...

I do really good for about a week or the longest was 10 days and THEN all of a sudden I STARt a HUGE binge and I just EAt and eat for a whole week which is what happend last time. And i think when i eat is because i get filled with emotions and i just stuff myslef if iam having a bad day or working too much or what ever. Then i have the problem of not having much time to exercise which is also a huge issue. Hopefully when i am done school i will be able to have some time. Another thing is i should be planing ahead but that ALso needs time. I think since last i might of gained some weight but i havent weighed my slef but i can feel it, thats why i took out my signature because i know i have gained back the 3 lbs i lost. I was also thinking that instead of wanting to lose 25-30lbs i should just aim to lose lets say 6 pounds a month that way i dont get discouraged. I just want to finish school and take te timei have off to lose weight as well as taking care of myself.

I was just wondering though How Do You Guys Start Over Again After Messing up?

12-21-2006, 10:40 AM
So i gave some thought to what it was i was doing wrong and i thought of all of things. One is that i dont eat three times a day sometimes i go all day without eating then when dinner comes i eat huge amounts of food and on top of that i crave sugar so i binge from the time i come home from work which is about 9 or 10 to the time i go to bed. And i realized that i will start slow first by eating three times a day with no snakes and then i will work on eating healthy. I think this is going to take a lot of patiences but i have Januaray to june to do this which is 6 months andthat isnt so bad. And i will be doing that starting today!
All of you out there wish me luck


12-21-2006, 10:42 AM
I realied i spelled snacks wrong and i also had other things that i had probelms with and that was eating at night which is the worst part.

12-25-2006, 12:42 AM
WOW! What Am i doing with myself??? I think i am about to eat myself to death for the past week i have ate non-stop. I ate half of A HUge cake!! Why i ask my slef over and over again!?!?!?! And I HAVE NO IDEA!!!Gosh this is so depressing! I just want school to be over, and i want 2006 to over, and most of all i want this eating to be over. I need to get a hold of my self. I NEED TO STOP! Starting tomorrow my goal is to eat three times a day and eat three good meals.

Damn...Why Is This Happening to ME?!!?!!!! :@ :(

12-25-2006, 08:39 AM
OK, Lose25. Just simmer down a minute. Take a deep breath and relax.

You are so stressed out. If you don't change something you might get really sick. I don't mean about food, I mean about the stress. You are taking on way way too much, girl! It's no wonder you overeat--it's probably the only way your body feels like you are taking care of yourself.

Why do you have to work 42 hours a week? Do you really have to do that? Why not cut back so you will have some leisure time? I know you probably need the money but there is no end to needing more money. What you need is down time, and you're the only one who can give it to you.

You don't have to be the mom. You just think you do. I've been in your position, and I thought I had to solve everything, too. I was wrong about that. And I sure didn't get a lot of appreciation.

I think you would find it just as stressful to be living somewhere else on your own. You want to get away because of what it's like at home, but if you would stop trying to run everything you might find it's a little easier. You took on a job no one asked you to do. Also, if you were not working all the time, you might find you don't feel so much like running away.

Now about food. Three meals a day is standard, but most people include two or three snacks in between, even when dieting. If you were eating enough food during the course of a day, you would not be so inclined to binge when you do stop to eat.

You seem to be good at taking charge of things like helping the others with homework, so probably you can take charge of your own food. Start by making sure you always have some good, healthy snacks with you, so that if you get hungry you can eat something other than junk. This could be a healthy snack bar, a half a sandwich, some nuts and dried fruits, some real fruits like apples. You get the idea. And when you are hungry before bed, try to concentrate on whole foods like lowfat milk, fruits, whole grains instead of going for the cake.

Mainly, try to chill!!!!!! Living on the edge can be exciting, but there is an end to the fun. Being filled with hate all the time is no way to live.

Good luck in the new year!

12-25-2006, 02:31 PM
Hey there. Don't beat yourself up over the fact that you swayed from your 'diet'. (I prefer to call it living a healthy lifestyle). If you allow yourself one day that's your free day that might be easier for you. You usually find that you won't eat like a maniac that day even though its your 'free day' because you know you worked hard all week on maintaining your goals. You are more likely to eat one thing that you love, or just have a meal that you wouldn't normally eat through the other six days. Even if you do slip up and eat something that you wished you hadn't, move on, continue to eat healthy the remainder of the day. Don't start over with the notion, I'll start again tomorrow because simply that day usually doesn't come. If you have cravings on an ongoing basis, it could because you are cutting out too many carbohydrates (you can usually tell by the fact that you are getting bad breath on an ongoing basis from the lack of carbos). Chromium may help stop your sugar cravings but so do things with high-fiber.
Remember we are all human, its natural to slip and slide on things but that does not mean to give up. Up and onward I always say.

12-25-2006, 05:29 PM
I was having a very similar problem. I had gained around 25 pounds, maybe a bit more and I thought that if I just started "watching what I ate" it would come off eventually. That didn't happen, so I started reading the posts here, starting with the goals and before and after threads. Then either through links here or through my own web searching I started figuring out some basic facts about nutrition. I figured out that for my height, weight, activity level, I needed to eat aroun 1670 cals a day to lose a pound a week and around 1420 to lose 1.5. To lose 2 pounds a week I would have to so severly restrict my caloric intake to a point that i wouldn't get all the nutrients I needed so I realized this was going to take me a while. I think it's important to accept that. (I've been averaging around 1520 a day and exercising way more than I originally thought I would.)
It's better to lose it slowly by changing your lifestyle then losing it in two weeks with some weird crash diet which is impossible to maintain.
Long story short...the whole calories in calories out is true. I started logging everyithing i ate (fitday is free) and even when I ate really high calorie foods I logged it. After about a week, I came to realize (a) I was eating way more than I needed to (b) if i ate healthy fruits/veg etc. I could easily stay within my budget of calories and never be hungry. For me, nothing is forbidden b/c if i feel I "can't" eat something, that thing will be the object of my obsession until i eat it. So I tell myself I can eat anything as long as I log it and stay within my budget. What ends up happening is that it becomes easier for me to say no to things b/c I know that I will have to log it. It also makes me exercise when I feel lazy b/c I want to log it so the numbers are less daunting.
This takes the mystery out of it for me. When the scale doesn't move I know it's b/c I ate X amount and I only burned X amount. Something about that makes me feel like i'm in control.
sorry this is so long

12-25-2006, 09:19 PM
Hey All..
I am hoping to gain control when iam done school. Like everyone keeps telling me iam doing way too much. So hopefully when iam done school in jauary i can start everything a fresh. And doning too much wont be a problem. I just feel that no matter what i wont be able to lose there 30lbs. I have been trying since september and i dont know what i am doing wrong. Do you guys think i should join some group or read some kind of a diet book. I know You On A Diet Is huge so i was thinking of buying that book and trying it. or Dr.Phill's book.

What do you guys think?

12-27-2006, 11:51 PM
TO all of You who gave me encouragment i thank you all from the bottom of my heart! And here is the good news (thanks to you guys) I started my new "LifeStyle' Today (gosh that sounds better than diet) . ANd so far i have been doing great! I think one of the hardest things for me was getting back on the diet And well HERE iam back on the wagon and iam praying to god that i wont fail this time. It scares the **** out of me thinking of failing but i know i can do this this time around. So here is what i ate....

I had cereal & Milk for breakfast
Lunch was a Bolgona sandwich with Tomatoes and lettuce
snack was one cup of cereal
dinner was lassi some rice chicken and a few other veggies It was take out but i didnt eat a lot of it!

And for excercising i walked home.

Oh and more good news iam getting a treadmil before the end of the week And also i got a sauna Belt.

Anyways wish me luck i g2g
Xox Beyonca

12-29-2006, 03:15 PM
My third day on my diet and iam already nervous! I havent excercised yet but i will be when the holidays are over or maybe before that. I have Decied to set three small goals every month that i will try to accomplish starting from Jan-May.

My Goals For January

1. Eat Breakfast EVERYDAY
2. Drink Lots Of Water
3. Stay Away From Sugary Foods
4. Excercise

12-29-2006, 03:40 PM
Excellent goals, Beyonca!! We are rooting for ya!!!

12-29-2006, 04:19 PM
Love the goals, You have a great start and wonderful support here. Keep on writing and Let us know how your doing. I was looking into that book also. guess I will have to hit amazon next :) YOu can do this, baby steps

12-30-2006, 04:25 PM
thank You. I hopefully can do this. I ate two cimamon rolls today which wasnt good but thats okay i wont beat myself up for a small mistake. I will make up for it. The main thing is i dont want to eat over 2000 points.

12-31-2006, 03:01 PM
Well Happy New Year To all. Today after the count down is both of my sisters birthdays! No they arent twins they just have the same birthday which is Jan.1. Today is a huge test for me because there will be plenty of food and lots of cake. So hopefully i dont fall off the wagon, because it will be the hardest thing to do is getting back on the wagon. I wish you all a happy new year, and i have a great feeling about 2007 i know i can lose this 30lbs.

Happy New Year to all ANd thank you all for your support through my ups and downs. TO all A HAppY and GReat New YEar and May All of your dreams, hopes, and wishes come true in 07.

CHeers To All

12-31-2006, 05:40 PM
And HAPPY NEW YEAR to you, Beyonca!!!! Stay with your goals! And check in with us here--we are all in it together.


12-31-2006, 07:15 PM
There have been great responses to the question of why do we gorge and hate ourselves later. It begins with why we overeat to start with. then onto why don't we stop when we aren't even hungry. If we knew the answers we would be rich. It is something that you have to look into yourself to see. It is frustration with some part of our lives we cannot control. We can control what goes into our mouths. And only having low fat goodies around is the best start. Popcorn and pretzels can be eaten in large amounts without ruining all you have worked for. Just keep telling yourself that you will do better and starting with just a little exercise each day will keep you wanting to eat better since you are doing that.
Good Luck to you and just remember, we are all human and have all been there.

12-31-2006, 08:48 PM
Well I did Fall Off The wagon BUT i dont really regret it much. I know i will do MUCH better tomorow in 2007!!!! I ate lots of pizza but tomorrow i will do better. Tomorrow I will do really well I just know it. I cant wait to start 2007 with a new fresh start and new ideas on weight loss. I know i can do this!

01-01-2007, 05:20 PM
NEW YEAR!! FEels Great. I dont know i feel really good about starting this diet and iam excited. I just want january to be over fast since i will be done school. That way i have more time for my diet and my slef. This time i know i wont fail. So here is to my 6th day on my diet.


GR8 2B48
01-01-2007, 09:59 PM
Hi, Beyonca

Stick with, you can do it. I read your previous posts and I know how hard it can be when we have weight issues. I've lost 30 lbs. and partly because I removed certain foods from the house.

I don't deny myself anything, I just eat smaller quantities. I know I can't go to the store and buy a dozen doughnuts because I will eat them. If I want something like that I just buy what I think I need to eat at one time. If it's not in the house I'm not going to worry about it. Also I've replaced high fat food items with a lot of lower fat high fiber ones. You can eat well and have fun on this journey. Best wishes.


01-02-2007, 05:21 PM
Based on your posts, I'd say food is merely a symptom of a MUCH larger problem.

Check in to the therapy programs available at your school and get yourself some help.

01-03-2007, 02:20 AM
LOL well Beginme I dont think it was part of a larger problem i think i just ate for no reason or just when i was depressed, BUt i think i have a grip on that now and i dont need help. I got all the help i needed here in 3FC from the people who supported me and helped me. Anyways i havent dieted and i dont plan on dieting anymore. I think iam just going to eat everything but in small portions and in the end of january i want to see if it this worked and if i have lost any weight. I am not aiming to lose much but just about 5lbs a month or so. ANd i will starting working out as soon as the holidays is over.

Best of wishes to everyone

01-04-2007, 12:30 AM
Based on your posts, I'd say food is merely a symptom of a MUCH larger problem.

Check in to the therapy programs available at your school and get yourself some help.

Seems kinda harsh.....

01-04-2007, 12:32 AM
Hi Chick In the Hat! I am glad you still come to check on my progress. LOL yes i thought it was a bit harsh as well. Just because we eat doesnt mean we have to go to therapy.

01-05-2007, 02:38 AM
Well I must admit i ate a lot today. I was doing really well BUT Then 2 hours ago i ate a lot of chips and 3 oatmeal bars that chocolate covered ones and i also had lots of popcorn so i think i must of ate like 3000 calories today. I hesitated when i wrote 3000 but iam just guessing i think those last things i ate must of been a lot of calories. I dont feel too great i have been doing really well. I did good for a week and today was my 8th day but i messed up. But iam not really beating my self up i know everyone has a bad day and tomorrow i will do better. I havent weighed my self to see if i have lost anything and i am not even sure how many pounds i started with but iam just going to wait untill MOnday thats when i sign up for a my old gym again and i can weigh my self then. Also this month i am not really dieting because i want to do this whole dieting thing when i am done school which is the end of january so i only have one month left. Well less than that. Then when February comes thats when i start really work. I think then i will also have more time to take care of myslef.

01-05-2007, 08:29 AM
Well, Lose25, maybe after January you can get serious about it, 'cause you're not serious now. ;) I say that 'cause you don't know how much you weigh, and you don't know how many calories you eat. Well--it's not a program that leads to much success, IMHO.

Good luck, and be sure to check in! :carrot:


01-06-2007, 09:51 PM
I JUST DONT GET IT!! I Mean what is it that make me eat so much? am i an emotional eater or do i just eat for no reason????? i mean is it my fault that i eat so much or is it my mother's fault who buys anything and everything that is full of fat and sugar?????? I was doing so well for a week then all of a sudden yesterday and i today i have been eating non-stop. I mean what iam doing to my self and what i am i doing wrong?!?!?! Did everyone have this much of a hard time when they first started and wantedto lose weight? BUt iam not so new to this i have been trying to lose weight since september! i just feel so useless and iam also feeling like a huge failure! I mean isnt 5 months enough to get me started on this diet or life style!! I am just exahusted and i dont even know what to do anymore. I just have this huge fear within me that i will just gain more and more weight and wont be able to lose any of it!!! :( :@


01-06-2007, 11:44 PM
I JUST DONT GET IT!! I Mean what is it that make me eat so much? am i an emotional eater or do i just eat for no reason????? i mean is it my fault that i eat so much or is it my mother's fault who buys anything and everything that is full of fat and sugar?????? I was doing so well for a week then all of a sudden yesterday and i today i have been eating non-stop. I mean what iam doing to my self and what i am i doing wrong?!?!?! Did everyone have this much of a hard time when they first started and wantedto lose weight? BUt iam not so new to this i have been trying to lose weight since september! i just feel so useless and iam also feeling like a huge failure! I mean isnt 5 months enough to get me started on this diet or life style!! I am just exahusted and i dont even know what to do anymore. I just have this huge fear within me that i will just gain more and more weight and wont be able to lose any of it!!! :( :@


Alot of people ( myself included ) eat for reasons that have nothing to do with being physically hungry. If you think this is your problem then it's something you will have to explore within yourself. What are your triggers? Is it stress? Boredom? Anxiety? Once you know what sets you off it's easier to catch yourself. Everyday I catch myself wanting to eat if I'm upset or tired or stressed about something. It's a hard habit to break and it doesn't happen overnight. But, being more aware of what is driving you to eat can help.

Secondly, you need to stop beating yourself up so much. If you slip up you need to forgive yourself. Beating yourself up only makes you feel worse than you already do. You can't change the past, only the present and the future. So, forgive yourself and move on. :hug:


01-06-2007, 11:48 PM
Unless your mother is holding you down and putting the food into your mouth, it is not your mother's fault.

All sorts of suggestions have been made in all these posts, but you don't seem to have taken any of them. Go back and read what people have said to you. Choose some of the suggestions and do them.

What more can we say?

I'm sorry you're having such a frustrating time. Maybe you should talk to a school counselor or see your doctor. It's hard for everyone not to eat whatever they feel like, whenever they feel like it, but that's what has to be done.


01-07-2007, 11:25 AM
I'll have to agree with JayEll's post. I will add however, the reason you may 'feel' like eating non-stop after eating well for a few days is because your body is adjusting AND you may not be eating the right combination of foods to sustain your bodies needs. Yes, you have to cut calories, but you also have to eat the right amount of protein, carbohydrates and fats in order for your body to not feel starved.

01-07-2007, 08:39 PM
Unless your mother is holding you down and putting the food into your mouth, it is not your mother's fault.


I agree with this 100%. Despite the enviroment or triggers at some point we all have to accept responsibility for what we CHOOSE to do. I don't mean for this to sound harsh, but it's the truth.


01-08-2007, 12:27 AM
Everyone eats more than they planned on, sometimes. The key is to stop once you realize what you are doing and not give in to the idea that "Well...I've blown today - it won't matter if I keep eating even more"

And I second the advice that you have to stop beating yourself up. You will get to goal...just not quite as quickly as you may want. Pick yourself up and get back on plan.

01-08-2007, 01:59 AM
I won't beat over the same bush and repeat what everyone else said, but it seems like you've fallen into a few pitfalls of "Common Weight Loss Mistakes" ~ a great eDiets.com article:


It's very sound advice, and I hope you can apply some of them now. G'luck!

01-08-2007, 02:20 AM
Over the years I've become a lot more aware of what I was putting in my mouth and why because I've been constantly watching my weight after watching my father and sister balloon up. While it might be partially genetics, my mother spends most of her days sitting on the couch eating fat-free Snackwells or Sugar-Free Hostess Cupcakes, drinking diet sodas for hydration, and complaining about her weight despite the fact that she's fairly thin for what she eats and the activity level she persists at.

I hope most of you are cringing since fat-free and sugar-free are by no means healthy, nor "better" than the full-fat or sugary items they replace, especially in large quantities.

The point being, when I moved out of my house, I moved out with some interesting values about food. It took many years for me to eliminate that kind of eating, but one thing that triggers me to eat a lot (and a major reason I think I'm overweight) is a family value I was raised with: eat it now before it is gone. I cannot let leftover sit in my fridge longer than 12 hours for this reason. I eat not so much because I'm hungry, or even that I'm bored, but because there is something in the fridge that is special and should be consumed sooner rather than later.

The point to all these stories is that I don't blame my family for those food-values, but that I recognize them now. If you look for patterns in your family's eating habits, you can make changes. My mother is always trying to shove food down my throat and buying my favorite desserts when I visit (Creme Brulee for Christmas, etc), and then attempts to guilt me into eating them because the food offering is an expression of love. I see it, and it allows me to see her goal and yet still maintain my OWN food values.

Just a thought.

01-09-2007, 12:58 AM
Hey Maculated well that was a really fantastic thought. I think i can relate a lot to your story. My mother also shows her love with food and buying us our favourite food and so on. My whole family is pretty much overweight. It hurts to write it down but its not pretty much it is yes they are over weight. Except for my oldest brother. But my little sister and little brother are on their way of becoming overweight too. I have always been like that to just never throwing food away and always eating it so it doesnt go to waste. Even when i go to restuarants i have always been full but never had the ability to tell the waiter to take the plate away and throw the food out. But i think i have realized a lot of things since coming to this website. I have learned a lot about my self. ANd i think i wont get anywhere with bi***ing about my weight and crying over eating WAY TOO Much icecream. I think only i can help myself, and alot of what everyone has said to me is absoloutly true. SO i want to thank everyone again.

Anyways so this is it for me. No more complaining, no blaming anyone, and most of all no more over eating. Today is my second day on what seems like an excellent healthy diet. All i have to do now is excercise which i will at the end of January. BUt my plans are to eat 1200-1600 calories a day and eat three meals and two snacks. I hope to achieve many more days than just two to lose this weight. And I know i can do this, and there is nothing wrong with failing one day. I know i said i would start a serious diet in February but i think starting now rather than later is much better. Anyways thanks to all again. And Hopefully my next journal will say that i have lost 5 lbs!!!! (which is my goal for January)


02-14-2007, 10:36 PM
HEY ALL!!! Well I am Back and this time iam not here to complain or whine BUT To Say That I have LOST MY FIRST 5 LBS!!!!! I am so excited about this and i cant wait till i lose the rest!!! This is all thanks to you guys!!

02-15-2007, 05:39 PM
This is all thanks to YOU, Lose25!! :bravo:

02-15-2007, 06:54 PM
COOL!!!! :D :bravo: :cp: :encore: :woohoo: :cheer2: :cheer2: :cheer2:


02-19-2007, 01:10 AM
Congratulations! :carrot:


02-19-2007, 01:56 AM
Coming to this thread late, but CONGRATULATIONS, Beyonca! Isn't seeing the ticker move in the right direction a great feeling?

Five pounds! Awesome! :carrot: :carrot: :carrot: