General chatter - Help!! Dating advice! Do I need to call him?

Tara D
12-03-2006, 11:45 AM
Help! I have no one else to ask! I have a low amount of dating experience -- need some advice! Went on a surprise spontaneous date last night with a guy I didn't know at all beforehand. I went because he asked -- I didn't really have anything else planned. Had an ok time, but not convinced that it would be a good idea to go out again. I think we're pretty different people. Do I have to call him today? Is it rude not to?

BTW, there is a small, but somewhat unlikely chance I might run into him again in the future. Does this change the answer any?


12-03-2006, 01:08 PM
I would say don't call.

Really there is no expectation that you would call the next day if at all so I don't think its rude not to (unless you SAID you would. Only say that if you mean it.).

Why not just leave the ball in his court...let him call you...or not. If he doesn't then maybe he got the same vibe you did that things weren't really clicking. And if he does call and ask you out again then you can decide if you want to see him again or not.

As for the chance that you might see him big deal just act normal when/if you do. People go on first dates but not second dates all the time.

Hope that helps.


12-03-2006, 01:17 PM
Out of curiosity...why are you not convinced that another date would be a good idea? Did something happen or was it just lack of chemistry?

12-03-2006, 01:46 PM
I'm with Casey on the first post, you have no obligation to call and it might even lead him on if you do:(

Not calling someone the day after a first date with them isn't rude...unless you said that you WILL CALL TOMORROW. And even then, it's not that big of a deal after one date.

It would definitely be more awkward if you ran into him in the future after a string of not-so-good dates that you went on because he got the wrong idea.

:shrug: Just my opinion, though :)

12-03-2006, 02:00 PM
I guess the question is do you want to call him?


Tara D
12-04-2006, 12:39 PM
Thanks for the advice! You know how Dr. Oz talks about your "Real Age" which is based on your diet/exercise/lifestyle habits? Well, even though my chronological age is 30, I consider my "Dating Age" to be about 14!!! I'm so behind!

To answer the question, I just feel like we are pretty different people, and we like to do different things. I wasn't really sure why he asked me out anyway since we had only spoken for about 1 minute (during a dance)before he asked! I don't really want to call him, but I was afraid it might be rude not to say thanks. I'm not sure what I'll do if he calls! Yikes!

Tara D
12-05-2006, 03:33 PM
No call maybe he did get the same vibe?

12-05-2006, 04:52 PM
Sounds like you're beginning to obsess.

Breathe . . .


12-08-2006, 09:22 AM
I would never, ever call a guy after a first date.. even if I WAS interested :)

It's always good to keep them wanting more.. if only for a little while :)