Support Groups - Holiday Chit and Chat #2

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11-30-2006, 07:07 AM
Hello and Welcome to the Jaded Ladies Holiday Chit and Chat! :coolsnow: :santa: :newyear: :han: :val1: :luck2you:

Here we can chat about the Holidays, what to get the people who have "everything" and want "nothing". Also we can discuss holiday recipes here and how to make them "figure friendly". Anything and everything concerning the Holidays and it doesn't just have to be the Winter Holidays. ;)

We can do this year round because it is always a constant battle to deal with Holidays and the food and what not. Why not alleviate some of the stress by coming here to help one another? :D

I hope you will come and join us!!!!!

Please come and join us for our Weightloss Chit and Chat as well!


12-09-2006, 03:56 AM
Sassy, I was thinking...if you wanted to buy your DH a recliner, but he needs to pick it out himself, you could always set aside the $, then wrap up a box with the money and a picture of a recliner cut out of a store ad -- and a note that you'll go with him to pick it out the day after Christmas :) That actually works with any bulky gift, to wrap up a picture of it -- I've hidden things in closets and wrapped up tiny boxes with only a picture inside. I did that when I bought my kids a PlayStation 2, because they all knew exactly the size and shape and weight of the box because they'd been drooling over it at the store for months.

I didn't post on this thread before, so I hope this isn't repeating what's already been said, but I was wondering what some of your favorite holiday traditions are with your families -- whether they cost a bit, or are low-cost or free. For example, we love to:

- drive around the ritzy neighborhoods to look at Christmas lights, playing Christmas CD's on the car stereo
- go to SF to the Dickens Christmas Fair the day after Thanksgiving (that kicks off the season for us)
- take in a matinee with Noah (this year it will be "Happy Feet")
- go to a Christmas concert or church Christmas program (one year, I really want to go to a Messiah sing-along)
- drink real hot chocolate (not Quik, but we'll still use 1% milk :lol:) while we decorate the tree. This year I think we'll put in a little Peppermint Schnapps...that's called a Sleigh Ride, and it's soooooooo good...
- we always watch these DVD's: Charlie Brown Christmas, A Christmas Story, How the Grinch Stole Christmas, and my favorite is A Christmas Carol -- the one with George C. Scott as Scrooge, he was amazing. And I always try to watch those cheesy cartoons on TV if I can catch them, like Frosty and Rudolph.

I'm sure I can think of more, but it's really late. What does your family do?

12-09-2006, 01:27 PM
GREAT idea Mary Kate! I'll have to remember the picture thing some time.


With DH#1 we always bought a live tree on Dec 1st and out decorating started then. When he passed I bought an artificial tree and we started our decorating the weekend after Thanksgiving. It has gotten even earlier and now for the last 9 years we do our outdoor decorating on Thanksgiving Day and the inside usually the following day. This year was a little earlier so Josh would come home to Christmas.

We always had our Christmas Dinner on Christmas Eve and then go to Mass later on that evening. Midnight Mass at 10, lol. But with Josh in the Army this year that tradition went out the window. We will still attend Mass but dinner??? Not sure. Mass just started a few years ago but we started the Christmas Eve dinner when the kids were little so that we could go to over to my family's for Christmas Day. Once they left the state it was just a day for us to relax and eat leftovers and still is today!

We too love to drive around looking at the lights with Christmas music playing. I've done that since I was a little girl and continued with my children. Of course now they are older and not into it but me and Vince do it still.

I always play Christmas music while doing the decorating and cooking.

And as of last year a new tradition is going to the show on Christmas day. We did it last year and plan on doing it again this year. I was amazed at how many people actually go.

And movies? Well...Christmas isn't Christmas for us without seeing A Christmas Story, Christmas Vacation, Charlie Browns Christmas, Sleepless in Seattle, While You Were Sleeping (saw that 3 times last week,lol) and Home Alone 1 & 2., can't leave out the music...Mariah Carey's CD, Michael Bolton, Mannheim Steamroller, Elvis, Home Alone 1, Neil Diamond, John Berry and Martina McBride.

12-09-2006, 07:41 PM
Happy Holidays!

Great Idea, Kate! But I think we both are just going to give each other recliners for Christmas this year. But it may work for something for his bday, IF I ever think of anything! lmao! ;)

Our holiday Traditions:

We also drive around looking @ Christmas Lights
Watching the holiday favorites: Charlie Brown Christmas, Frosty, Rudolph
Playing Christmas music while putting up decorations
Putting out MIL's Outside Christmas Decorations, although this year we got out of it since she bought a new decoration that takes only a few minutes to put up!

I guess that is about it for me, well that I can think of right now! Great Idea, Mary Kate! :D


12-13-2006, 03:37 AM
Well I FINALLY finished up my Christmas Cards! :carrot:

I think later on today we will head over to storage and get out our Christmas things. I want to rearrange the furniture a bit too, maybe just make it a little bit different at least!

Its so hard to think that Christmas is only 11 days away!!!!!!! and I don't have ANY Christmas Gifts! :yikes: I know I only have my DH and my in-laws and our friends, but WOW I'm cutting it kinda close! lol.

So give me tips here, what have you all gotten so far for your loved ones and any good tips for me to get for my in-laws who have everything and want nothing? lmao. (Besides gift cards)??

Thanks and I hope you all are doing well!


12-15-2006, 02:06 PM
Hi Sassy...well your inlaws have everything and want nothing? My first thought would be to get them exactly what they want -- nothing. But that can be awkward, and could cause hurt feelings, even if they never like what you give them and give stuff away, etc. So...

:candy: gift cards. I know, you said "besides gift cards", but at least they could pick out their own stuff. Or a gift card to their favorite fancy restaurant -- give them a night on the town :)

:candy: gift certificate for an auto detailing, or some other service.

:candy: tickets to a play or concert they really want to see.

:candy: food that you know they love, or a really good bottle of wine, an expensive liquor they like, gourmet coffees, something consumable. Just make sure it's something you KNOW they love, the exact brand/flavor/variety they would splurge on for themselves.

:candy: a gorgeous holiday flower arrangement that will die and they can throw away the first week of January.

:candy: If they truly do not appreciate any gift you give them, then...a donation to their favorite charity in their name. Buy toys for the children's receiving home; or food for the soup kitchen in their town; diapers, toiletries, and warm clothes for the women's and children's shelter. Give them a card that says, on their behalf, you fed 10 homeless men Christmas dinner. A warning, though -- if you start this type of gift giving, then they are likely to reciprocate in kind. But...that's not such a bad present to receive, is it? And very much in the spirit of Christmas.

"Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?' The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.'"

Mary Kate

12-16-2006, 11:06 PM
Thanks Mary Kate for all the lovely suggestions. We think we found something for my mil that she might actually like, not so sure on my fil yet.

Yes for their bdays and anniversaries, we do not buy them anything but a card and sometimes we take them out to dinner, but that is all. But they did buy us a new bed for both of our bdays/anniversary/Christmas, so we feel like we should get them at least something.

I had a thought, but I doubt that DH would like it and not sure how the in-laws would react to it. We got a $100 gift card to a fancy steak place, but personally I really don't want to go, as its not my "cup of tea". And fil has already asked mil if we are taking them when we go. (MIL didn't appreciate him asking that). But the thing is they already KNOW we got it from the car dealership. Unless we say we just went and got them one since we know they both like it?

I dunno we'll come up with something I'm sure.

12-17-2006, 02:28 AM
Well I have news!

I was talking with DH about my "idea" about giving the Gift Card (The Gift Card is to a Very Fancy Steakhouse given to us by the car dealership that we bought our car from, it's a $100 gift card) to the in-laws for a Christmas Gift, as like I said, its really not our cup of tea. (Its really fancy) Well DH said that was fine as he wasn't very happy that he had to dress up in a suit and tie in order to go there. (says on their website) and he wasn't too impressed @ their menus and the inlaws have been before and loved it.

Then he got to thinking that he felt kinda guilty about "regifting" so I said why not get the in-laws a little something along with it and just tell them that we thought they would enjoy it more than us. I think they would be happy with that.

I just figure why not give it to people who would truely enjoy it rather than us keep it and possibly not use it? And then DH says all he wants is a good steak and that he will just pick up a good steak at Costco and some nice potatoes for baked potatoes and cook it himself. I said that was fine with me.

So what do you all think? Is it wrong to "regift" it even if we flat out tell them that its just not our cup of tea and we figured that they would enjoy it a whole lot more than we would and we would rather see someone use it who would truely enjoy it. So what are your opinions?

Also I should point out that my in-laws are also "Re-gifters" and beleive in someone truely using and enjoying something rather than to not use it.

Thanks Everybody!


12-17-2006, 05:15 AM
I think it's fine to give them the gift certificate, esp. if you give them a little something else along with it. I'm sure they'll be thrilled!

a question: I'm hosting a new years party. It was supposed to be an intimate gathering with only close friends, so we've made it a BYOB (only in spirit's more of a champagne/wine gathering.) party. Everybody was fine with that, since there were only going to be 8 or so of us and there'd be plenty of drinks to go around if everybody brought some. Well my guy friend invited this girl he really likes (too young for him!) and another male friend of his that I've never met before. They're both underage. This makes me uncomfortable for three reasons.

A. They're underage. 'Nuff said.
B. It was supposed to be a small group of really close friends. He's the only one that knows these two.
C. They'll be mooching drinks off of us.

Okay, I don't know the proper etiquette here. Do I tell them to give my friend money to buy something for them? Do I tell them they can't drink? It's not like this is a big get-drunk-party. There will be alchohol, but that's not the point or purpose of the night.

What do I do here? I can't uninvite them, even though it's my party, I wasn't the one to invite them in the first place.

12-17-2006, 05:22 AM
Hi MartiniTheRampage,

Thanks for your opinion, I greatly appreciate it! :D

About your party, I say it goes by House Rules and if your haveing it at your House, then I say you get the say so of what goes and what does not go.

I had sort of an exp. close to this one myself, years and years ago. I had a party and invited some friends, only a few friends like you did. One of my friends showed up with a "posse" of his friends, which was fine with me, the more, the merrier. Until they asked if it was alright if they smoked Marijuana in my house. (Well at least they asked first!) I kindly said, "I don't care if you smoke it, just not in my house and not around me." So they all went outside and soon after left. (Good Ridence I say!) lol.

So that is my opinions. Not sure on the Proper Etiquette and all, but that is how I handle it. If anything, tell your friend however you want it and let him pass it on to his friends.


12-17-2006, 06:08 AM

I found this site that may be helpful as well:

Safe Holiday Party Planning a Safe Holiday Party (

12-17-2006, 06:21 AM
It's not at my house. I was the only one who went away to school, and I'm going down there for the holidays. But it's at a different friends house, not the friend who invited the kids (:dizzy: ) and there aren't really any house rules about this particular thing.

But I'm the unofficial coordinator/official guest of honor. :D so I haven't seen these guys since the semester started...that's why it kind of bummed me out when he said that he was going to be bringing two complete strangers. Normally I wouldn't mind,'s OUR night! lol. :p And I don't want to be responsible for them drinking. :^: Something tells me they're going to be three sheets to the wind before the night's up...

12-17-2006, 06:27 AM
Thanks for the link! It's really helpful.

I think these guys only want to be there because they think it's "that kind of party." lmao, maybe I can trick them into drinking non-alchoholic beer? I'll definitely buy sparkling grape juice/sparkling cider!

12-17-2006, 07:27 AM
Tell the friend who invited the underage, young people that they are welcome to come to your home but they may not drink alcoholic beverages at your home. Period. If you can't stand up for your rights in your home...If they leave there and something awful happens, accident, date rape, etc. you are legally responsible. I raised alot of kids and grandkids, it is hard enough for teens to make good decisions sober. They might act offended but they will respect you for your stand.

12-17-2006, 10:55 AM
Hey MartiniTheRampage,

Even if its not at your house, you said that, But I'm the unofficial coordinator/official guest of honor. I think that gives you the right to let your friend know that his friends are welcome to come, but since they are underage, they won't be able to drink, like Idahosenior said.

:goodluck: and remember its YOUR night, so enjoy it, don't let them ruin it for ya! ;)

12-17-2006, 11:06 AM
Martini: You can't be too careful nowadays. I agree with PP, tell them no alcohol, PERIOD. It's your party and your friend's house. Your rules are what need to be followed. Don't forget how sue-crazy people are these days. :no: At any rate, I hope your party is a smashing success! You'll have a wonderful time! :hug: :cheers:

Sassy: I say regifting is a wonderful idea, especially with another gift to go along. It's much better than the card going to waste, right? And it'll be a nice meal the two of them will enjoy. :T

As far as my own holiday traditions go, I don't have many. This is the first year I've had a Christmas tree since I was 17. Normally, the Christmas tradition is to try not to go crazy as my fiance and I rush between our two families for Christmas/Eve. :dizzy: This year, as I said, we went to look at Christmas lights, and that didn't turn out well... lol :p Normally, we have fudges and cakes and cookies (and POUNDS! :mad: ) galore by now. I've been very good with my diet and exercise during this holiday season, imho. Knock on wood. Lol.

12-17-2006, 11:37 AM
Hey Tiffie.

Thanks. I agree, I think someone should enjoy such a nice gift. ;)

We are the same way, we still haven't put up our "tree" yet, if you want to call it that. Its like a Charlie Brown Tree really. lol. DH has this HUGE 7 1/2 Foot tree that is just ridiculously huge for our small apt. so mil gave us a small tree to put up, this is my kinda tree. Wanna know how you set it up?

Step 1 - Take it out of the box

Step 2 - Set it on the table where you want it.

That is it! lol. :rofl:

Well chicas, I'm off to bed. I need some much needed Zzzzzz's! (I work nights)

12-18-2006, 02:29 AM
Step 1 - Take it out of the box

Step 2 - Set it on the table where you want it.

That is it! lol. :rofl:

Well chicas, I'm off to bed. I need some much needed Zzzzzz's! (I work nights)

Hey, that's the best kind! :lol:

Thanks for the advice guys are right. I'm not going to worry about offending them. :) I can even set an example, since I'm probably not going to drink much more than a glass of champagne at midnight.

Only 7 days till Christmas! Wow! I can't believe it's here already. I just have one more person to shop for and I'm done. :cb: Why are men the hardest to shop for? Agh, I also have to bake for everybody! I'm making a tin of goodies for everyone I work with. Chocolate covered pretzels, peanuts, peppermint; cookies; turkish candy...ect. wish me luck on not snacking while I cook!

12-18-2006, 03:53 AM
Martini: Yes that is MY kinda tree, lemme tell ya! But my DH is "Mr. Christmas" Luckily we still live in the small apt, so this year is the "Charlie Brown Tree"

YVW and I think you'll enjoy yourself, don't worry about them, have fun!

I hear ya about men and how hard they are to shop for. UGH. My fil is impossible, has everything, but of course, wants nothing. lol. I think I found something for my DH though!! Its a leatherman or some people call it a multi-tool? They have one at Costco that comes with a knife too and little carrying cases for them and all that stuff. So there is one thing down! lol.

I am also baking for other people, for work and for my mother who is coming up on Christmas, after work and staying with us a couple days. ;)

I am pretty good about not snacking when I bake, but I make take a lick of the batter! ;)

Enjoy yourself!


12-21-2006, 04:37 AM
Well the holidays are creeping up on us now! R U all ready? I'm not! lol. Still have not gotten a little something for the in-laws. I made many suggestions today but DH didn't like any of them! :p

We did get our "goods" for our Christmas Dinner we are having with my mom on Tues. ;)

I still have to go out and buy my DH's present yet! How am I going to do that I don't know, since we are both working all weekend! I don't know what to do. I need a personal shopper!!!!!!!! lol. I guess I will figure something out!!!!

Happy Holidays everybody!

12-22-2006, 12:28 PM
Yes, Sassy I am ready for the Holidays...for them to be OVER, lol! Hate to say it but the holiday was really over for me on the 11th.

We are just having a small ham dinner...with potatoes, yams, green beans, salad, rolls and a couple desserts...cheesecake for DD, pumkin pie for DH, and brownies for DS. I think I got dessert'ed (I know that's not a word, lol) out on the 11th since it was too soon after Thanksgiving and so I didn't get anything that I wanted-nothing sounded good.

I did finish my shopping yesterday...wasn't really anything, just had to pick up one gift and of course do my grocery shopping.

I am just ready to start the New Year and for this one to be over with!

A very MERRY CHRISTMAS to you all!

12-22-2006, 10:34 PM
I hear ya on that Cristina. I'm ready for the Holidays to be over! As then I won't be working 15 + hour shifts! lol. (working 15 hours on Xmas!!) So I'm just ready for them to be over and done with.

DH said that we're going to request some time off in Feb. since we worked ALL the holidays. Which we really didn't care too, just extra money in our pockets, but we do need some time off!

We don't mind working, but it does get kinda old after a while, working EVERY Holiday! We have worked EVERY single holiday this year! Except for Easter and to me that really doesn't count since you don't get "paid" for it. But all the other "Paid" Holidays we have worked, every single one! Next year I am happy to report that Xmas is on a TUESDAY and unless something major happens with our shifts, that is NOT our scheduled night, so therefore we won't get paid any holiday pay for it, so that means we are not going to be working Xmas next year! :D :D :D :dance: :carrot:

I wanted to add that I checked out the calender for next year and it looks like we are going to miss working ALL the major holidays as most are on Tues/Wed, which we don't work! (unless something changes) AND we will be working New Years Day, so "technically" we will already have our "one holiday a year" in! (you are required to work at least one holiday a year here). :dancer: :woohoo:

Happy Holidays!

12-23-2006, 09:32 AM
Santa Game:

12-24-2006, 05:09 PM
SASSY...DS and DH had to work today also! But not 15 hours, egads! At least it's not a full day for them and at least you and DH are working together so one is not sitting home alone. And wtg on no having to work holidays next year! :crossed:

12-24-2006, 05:35 PM
Hey Cristina. Yup 15 hours tonight! I feel like I'm getting ready for a marathon! lol. But like I said, we don't have to work any holidays next year!!!!!! :carrot:

12-25-2006, 06:48 AM
So Has Santa visited your house Yet??????? :hohoho:

12-26-2006, 12:29 AM
MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! Hope everyones went well. Mine was fantastic! I got a brand-new laptop!!! Very nice Christmas. Hope everyone else's was happy!

Merry Christmas Jesus. :)

12-30-2006, 07:58 PM
Hi Gals.

Tiffie, what a great gift! What did I get for Xmas?

Well I got most of my gifts early. The in-laws bought us a brand new bed that was not only for Xmas but for both of our bdays and our anniversary. But MIL did get us a few little things just to have something to open up. I got a pretty fleece holiday shirt and an M & M ceramic container. (I collect the Green M & M) Oh yeah and don't forget about our New Car we bought ourselves Nov. 1st! ;)

DH & I are going to do ours probably next pay check as that one is going to be the one with all of our Over Time on it. I told DH that I was thinking of getting him either a Wii or an IPod (one with video). I told him because I would rather him pick out what he wants and I don't know much about the IPods at all. So he is going to think on which one he wants. As for me, I can't think of anything I want except for time off of work and DH can't really give that to me! lol.

I hope you all had a Great Xmas!

Any big plans for New Years??????

Mine? WORK!!!!!! Go figure! :rofl: