LA Weight Loss - Intuitive Eating #2

Hi, it's me posting again...

While we were traveling for my grandfather's funeral, we did a little binge eating. Especially on the way home with four hours in the car and me with the flu or something like it. But overall, I would have to say that food is taking a back seat as far as what is important in my life.

If you have ever smoked cigarettes, then perhaps you can understand the fear of facing a day without something unnecessary, like binge eating. Like, what the **** am I going to do without ice cream, cheese, whatever. It's scary, but doing away with the dieting eventually sets in and eventually the slavery to whatever forbidden food goes away.

I know that I am not the thinnest I have been in my life, in fact I am likely closer to the fattest. But I feel a peace and a new freedom from the need for food.

I feel like I am on the brink of something much, much better. And I've recently been around people who have had the surgery I once considered, and I am honestly glad I didn't do it. I admire them and want to look like them, but without the demons. I can wait a few years to get there, instead of the six months or whatever that surgery promises. I want to be there without being sick, or feeling deprived, or having a physical barrier, or removing a food group from my life. Heck, all I have ever wanted was just to be normal!

Anyway, I just felt like writing something to the board. It's scary, but I think it is worth it to try giving up the diets. Stick it out, I know I will...

Wiffle,

It definitely does take a leap of faith to give up the dieting mentality. The sellers of diet books, videos, etc. have done a good job of drilling into us that you can't lose weight without being on a "diet." That was what I had the hardest time with when I first started intuitive eating--making that leap of faith. But as fat as I was I decided it could hardly make things any worse than what I was doing.

And it is wonderful to just be able to enjoy food without having a lot of emotional baggage tied to it.

TGIF! Good Morning ladies! Hope everyone is well and ready for a great weekend! I am SO thankful the weekend is here, I am draggin my behind today! lol Luckily the kids are out of school today so more rest for me---yeah, right! lol

Wiffle, I couldn't agree more with you, loved your post. I know that IE is the way for me now, forever. I can't explain the sort of peace I had rush over me just on the 2nd day of this. All the stress, all the expectations, then what I knew would be disappointment, all fell away. What a load off! I am content to do this slow, may take me 3 years instead of the 1 that will take my best friend who's low caloring it. BUT, I think I can say that I'm almost guaranteed to keep it off for good??? And, enjoy every bite along the way! :D That's the best part if you ask me!!!! I've also discovered that alot of what I thought were my favorite forbidden foods, don't quite taste as great as I'd always thought. Go figure!! I was sorry to read about your grandfather, I know he's in a better place now for sure. I hope you and your family are well. :hug:

Fiddler, gosh you are just doing this whole thing brilliantly! Your clothing size difference is amazing. Go you!!!! When I read the book IE for the first time, I went into it with the same mindset, it couldn't hurt anything more than where I'm at. I am so glad that I did it!!! I admit, I was terrified to try this, absolutely not trusting myself with food. What a shame, all the diets I've bought into over the years have made me believe that I couldn't be trusted and therefore had to follow THEIR plan or I wouldn't be successful. So glad to have finally woken up from that nightmare!

Ladies, thanks for all the suggestions regarding family dinners. I think alot of my fear was stemming from, yet again, the diet mentality. The fear of eating out of control if I spent extra time in the kitchen for a meal for myself after feeding the rest of them. But honestly, it really is stupid to eat if I'm not even hungry, isn't it? lol

I hope you all have a great weekend and keep up the great progress with your new way of life!

♥ Danielle

Sugar-n-Spice, I totally agree with Obi here. I have a small little girl and dh, and I want dinner time to be a family event; so I try to anticipate what's coming ahead. I usually have a very small breakfast, a satifying lunch to make sure I am hungry by the time I get home. If I know that I will be going out with friends for dinner or be with my family, I try to eat something small to hold me down if I am hungry before it is time. In that way I will be nice and hungry when dinner time comes along.

Tonight something weird happenned. My dh decided to go out for dinner and beers with some of his friends so I stayed home with my dd. I had a satisfying dinner with my 1 yr old. In about a half hour or so I wanted a piece of chocolate! I was suspicious of this hunger since I just ate recently and had dessert too. So I stop myself and asked "Are you hungry?" I said "No" Then I did not move from the couch!!! I refused to overeat. Then the desire went off. I then realized that I was bore/lonely/out of place since my dh left to go out with his friends. The realization that I wanted food to confort me hit me hard, because in the past I would have never admit to such as behavior. Sometimes all we have to do is to "ask" ourselves before we reach out for food, and if the answer is "no" then wait and don't do it ;-)

Fanny-

Well, after another try at dieting, I am about ready to give up AGAIN! The extra weight in the belly area gained from taking prednisone has really been bugging me. But I sure can't last long on anything any more and I really think the IE is the answer to weight loss. It's just that I haven't lost any since I was sick last summer and gained it all back after I started the prednisone. Seeing as I will probably be on it for the rest of my life, I have yet to figure a way out of this. But it is easier to relax around food then to be constantly thinking what you can and cannot eat. Looks like everyone is learning some great things.

Oh! It is so good to be back to IE. I'm just to old too stick to anything else. It takes about 4 days of not eating certain foods and my body just rebels! Maybe that's a good thing! I was even craving apples of all things. But I did discover that sugar may be putting me into a slump at times. I will have to watch that one. Hope some of you chime in here soon.

Hang in there, Carol! I've been on prednisone before, and I know it can do nasty things to you. :(

I mostly cut sugar out of my diet quite a while ago because, simply, I found that it makes me want to eat more. I honestly don't miss it. I feel much better without it.

I hope the next few days go better for you. I'll be thinking about you.

Thanks so much, Fiddler. I kind of feel like I'm starting over in the losing department but your loss has encouraged us. I just get so impatient some times to see a considerable loss and then when it doesn't happen I get down. But I don't think anything else will work so I'll just hang in there.

Heck heck heck

I had this long post and then accidentally closed the window...blah


Ok

I think sometimes we get so caught up in weight loss we forget about the other benefits of IE. I Eat salads because I WANT to and I actually enjoy them. I can walk down the ice cream aisle in the supermarket and not feel like I am being tortured. I can go out to dinner and not feel like I have to starve myself or that I am going to binge. I decide how much and when I am going to eat.

I feel like I control my food, my food don't control me.

No diet ever gave me that feeling of control and...power.

On another note I went back to my walk away the pounds DVDs. My knees have startin hurting again and I feel like I have more energy when I do them.

Had Whetena (hot cereal) for breakfast because I wanted something hot that didn't involve bacon and eggs. Never would have done that before.

Hope everyone has a good day.

-Obie.

Obi, I agree, but I forget about those other advatages of IE. I can't find Wheetena anywhere........not even at Walmart.

Just made an interesting discovery. If you're too hungry food doesn't taste as good (you tend to wolf it down) ........just like when you eat without hunger food isn't as good either. I have 2 bad habits.....eating standing at the counter and waiting too long after hunger starts. Anyone else had similar problems? I think I eat at the counter to hide my eating from others. After years of weight loss struggle, it's hard to come out in the open with IE. You know noone would understand, especailly dh. But I REALLY think that is part of IE.....getting over what people think of how you eat. Someone mentioned eating with the family a few posts back and I would have to say that sitting and conversing with the family is just as important as eating although dh thinks I should EAT! There must be a way to work these problems out.

I know what you mean about being too hungry and wolfing your food down. Being on diets most of my life I've always ignored my hunger and that seemed normal to me. Now I try to eat something when I first feel the signs of hunger. I have discovered that if I eat when I first feel hungry, it takes less food to fill me than if I wait. I also find myself eating mindlessly and when I realize this, I make an effort to concentrate on how I'm feeling after each bite. After a while I'm hoping this will come naturally to me. Now that the weather has cooled down I have started walking again. Not because I have to, but because I WANT to.

Hope you all have a great IE day!

Re: Whetena. I live in NJ, found it right at the supermarket....

Hand raising to the wolfing down....When I get the stomach growling and rumbling in the stomach it means I have waited too long to eat. Then it is like I shoveling it in my mouth.....take a few minutes before the rumbling stops and I eat normally again. I aslo have a tendency to overeat when I have waited too long. There is a part of the overfed head that talks about it.

My secret eating place is the car. I was good for overeating junk in the car. It was my excuse to go to fast food places because of course I couldn't cook and it was on the way...blah.....Once I made myself stop eating in the car seems I am alot less likely to have it. I do have junk but not nearly as much.

What do you all think about small frequent meals as compared with one or 2 larger ones. How does this fit into IE.

What do you all think about small frequent meals as compared with one or 2 larger ones. How does this fit into IE.

Because of my job I don't really have time to deal with small meals through out the day and just naturally I am a 2 meal person.

I don't do well with small frequent meals. It makes me eat more.

And I like to get pretty hungry before I eat something. But then I don't really mind the feeling of being hungry, especially if I'm doing something at the time and don't want to stop to eat.

Fiddler, Do you think you can get too hungry and then overeat or doesn't extreme hunger affect you that way? I used to do a lot of fasting so I do know how to ignore hunger, but in the long run it didn't help my weight loss. What do you think, Obi?

Fiddler, Do you think you can get too hungry and then overeat or doesn't extreme hunger affect you that way? I used to do a lot of fasting so I do know how to ignore hunger, but in the long run it didn't help my weight loss. What do you think, Obi?

Actually, I seem to be satisfied with LESS food if I wait until I am really hungry. Maybe my stomach has shrunk? But I do make sure to drink extra water if I end up missing a meal or waiting a long time between meals. And I do eat very slowly, so it does give my stomach time to send that "that's enough" signal before I've consumed an excessive amount of food.

And while I'm not advocating skipping meals as a weightloss method, I don't believe in eating just because it's mealtime if you aren't hungry, or in substituting junk if nutritious food is not available at the time. Basically, when I eat is governed by when I am hungry and when my schedule allows. Sometimes I eat 3 meals a day, sometimes 2, sometimes 1. It just depends on what else I am doing and how hungry I am. And if the choice is between eating junk food or eating nothing, I choose to eat nothing.

Fiddler, Do you think you can get too hungry and then overeat or doesn't extreme hunger affect you that way? I used to do a lot of fasting so I do know how to ignore hunger, but in the long run it didn't help my weight loss. What do you think, Obi?

For me If I wait to long Itend to overeat, but the more I do IE the more in control I am. Also I think I am similar to fiddler in that I am starting to make better choices when I eat, so rather than eat junk just to get rid of the feeling of hunger I wait a little while longer and eat what I really want.

I don't think this is fasting....an example for me is my trip home. On some days I work 12-8. I have about a 20 min wait (and then a 45-60 min train ride) for my train and sometimes I feel hungry, but I would rather wait and eat what I cooked rather than grab something quick in the terminal. This is not to say I never grab something in the terminal, but again it is what I choose to eat. I had some cinibon minis last night and had dinner when I got home. I didn't need the big cinibon with all the frosting....but I wanted something sweet. I doubt I'll have another one for a long while.

I think I actually like feeling hungry. It gives me a physical cue on when to eat. One thing though...I don't get physical hunger feeling till I am about a 6 or 7 on a scale of 1 to 10. I have noticed when I start thinking hard about what i want to eat it is going to be time soon.

LOL, that was a lot for a little question. Had more whetena today. Playing hookey from work.

Happy Halloween, or just happy day if you don't celebrate.

-Obie

I'm beginning to discover that this sugar reaction is stronger than I realized. I had dessert at noon today and decided to lay down for a wee nap.....walla!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 2hr later I wake up groggy. It's amazing what you discover when you pay attention. I think I will leave any dessert type food until maybe say......right before bedtime when I need to get to sleep!!! Thanks for your responses Obi and Fiddler. They make a lot of sense.

Obi, I noticed you said, "I actually like feeling hungry." That's quite a revelation for me. Never thought about it like that before.

Obi, I noticed you said, "I actually like feeling hungry." That's quite a revelation for me. Never thought about it like that before.

Yeah, its a cue for me to eat, something I didn't really have before. It was diet binge, diet, binge and following someone else's rules. Now I gauge internally how I feel and what i want to eat.

Although today I was probably at about a 7 when I finally went to eat and I overate....but it was mostly seltzer, vegetables and salad. Before IE it would have been cake, ice cream, french fries...you get the idea...

Obi, I noticed you said, "I actually like feeling hungry." That's quite a revelation for me. Never thought about it like that before.

I second what Obi said. I like feeling hungry too. And I really abhor the feeling of being stuffed now. When I go out to a restaurant, I rarely get through more than the appetizer or salad and maybe a couple bites of the entree before I want to stop eating. The rest of it goes home with me in a box where it becomes one or two (sometimes even three) more meals.

The rest of it goes home with me in a box where it becomes one or two (sometimes even three) more meals.

LOL, before IE i never had left overs :dizzy:

Hi, Obi, are you still there. ha!

I tried to edit my signature but it didn't show up. Can you explain to me how to do it? Thanks.

I see it just showed up. Now how did that happen and why doesn't appear on all the posts? Computers baffle me. I have to go get a new tire for my dh so maybe I'll post later.

Hi all,

Long post/rant. Sorry!

I was looking at the reviews for Intuitive Eating on Amazon.com. Lots of "pros" a few "cons" and some not so sure. The cons seemed to be people with a disdain for fat people, those who think it is so simple to lose weight, just stop eating so much. That always makes me mad, but I know I cannot change their view, because as a fat person I must be in denial of the concept of self-control, and I also must be stupid, dirty and gross.

If the answer is to just not eat so much, anyone with an IQ over 80 would be fit and trim.

I spent about 10 years of my life socializing almost exclusively with members of a high IQ organization, and there you would find many people who were obese (must not have known how to lose weight - just stop eating so much - duh!) and even super-obese. Also, there were smokers (how smart is that?), heavy drinkers, and all sorts of "unwise" behavior. There were also quite a few that were unable to keep a job, or land a decent job, and several had very cluttered or filthy homes (obsessive compulsive in nature, perhaps, or even mental illness). I would say I saw a high occurrence of these behaviors in the high-IQ group than I do now that I am no longer associated.

My point is that intelligence cannot trump obsessive or compulsive behaviors. You cannot beat down that urge to eat with a simple "put the fork down" mentality. We all know that, but it irks me that there are a LOT of people out there who write us off as stupid, weak, and not worth knowing. This is an assumption that I make when I meet new people, that they will not like me because I am fat. When I do meet people and they enjoy my humor or see that I have common sense or intelligence, I feel that I have "overcome" their expectations of me. So, I have to win a friend by proving myself instead of just naturally acquiring a friend.

My husband has argued with me many times that this is in my own head. I've tried to show him things (TV, magazines, etc.) that prove a general hatred for fat people. I've also tried to show him examples of where "normal" sized people are labeled as overweight, as in some clothing catalogs, self-help shows, etc.

Now I think he sees the light, but also I am seeing the light that my own dislike of fat people (myself more than anyone else) is pretty strong too, so a lot of my bad feelings have come from within. It is very hard for me to accept that I could be this size forever but I am trying and maybe I am making progress there.

I have a new friend that I like very much. She's overweight too. She has been convinced that low carb was the way to go and she did that for a while, lost weight and gained it back. Now she is doing Weight Watchers with her fiance, and although I told her about Overcoming Overeating, I can tell she doesn't believe in it. I am not a good walking advertisement since I am not thin. Maybe someday though. I keep feeling that I am on the brink of a breakthrough.

Wiffle,

Which IQ society did/do you belong to? I'm a MENSA member myself.

I completely agree with you that your view of how other people perceive you is not "in your head" as your husband thinks. My experience has been the same as yours--that is, people like me once they get to know me, but because I am fat, they may not bother to try to get to know me.

Recently I reached the point in my weight loss where I apparently am not "invisible" to people anymore. And no, it is not because I am acting more confident myself due to the weightloss. I'm already one of the most self-confident (some would say insufferably so ;)) women you'd ever meet. I was trying to explain this concept of fat people being invisible to my counselor (she has never counseled an overweight person before), and she was so intrigued and distressed by it that she started trying to figure out if it was something she did in her own life, LOL.

With scientific evidence mounting daily that demonstrates that obesity is NOT just due to a lack of willpower, you have to wonder what excuse they'll come up with next to scorn fat people. It's almost the only remaining form of discrimination against a particular group that is still condoned by society.

Fiddler, I was in Mensa for quite a few years, before I met my husband. I found it to be a very accepting group, much more so than the majority of society. I was at my largest while in Mensa and still managed to have a good social life, while in the outside-of-Mensa world, I was excluded from the 5:00 happy hours and general parties at my job. Yet, all those people who gathered after work, the attractive single crowd, many of those people were friends with me one on one. I just didn't fit in with the flirty social circle.

When I lost weight (through obsessive exercise and calorie counting) I got so many more invitations to do things outside of Mensa. Of course my habits had changed (no drinking, I had quit smoking, etc.) and those after work drink and smoke fests were not interesting to me anymore! I do drink again, which I've been thinking might be a separate post.

Fiddler, do you socialize much in Mensa, and if so, have you found the acceptance level to be higher in that group?

At your height and size 18 I imagine that you are very visible! In a very good way!

But the prevailing thought still is, eat less, exercise more, weigh less. You can't get around it........so you HIDE......hide food, hide your behavior, hide how you truly feel about why you are fat. I spent many a day in tears last summer when they told me I had to start taking prednisone again......no compassioin from drs or others as to why you DON"T want to take it. So you just go along with what everyone says. I managed to go 25 yr. without going to the dr. (except for pregnancies) and I'm very glad I did. But in the end, I had to succumb to the dreaded drug. Hey! We all get to rant today!!

On the other hand........I had a good day eating wise today. Really busy running around getting tires, etc. Then dd and I kind of got lost on the way home because of a detour. We live an hr and a half from most any shopping area like Sams. Guess it's good to stay busy. DD does her school work at home so we stay home most days.

Fiddler, do you socialize much in Mensa, and if so, have you found the acceptance level to be higher in that group?


Unfortunately, I don't. The Mensa chapter here is mostly composed of retired people, and they plan their activities for when un-retired :( people are at work.

But the prevailing thought still is, eat less, exercise more, weigh less. You can't get around it........so you HIDE......hide food, hide your behavior, hide how you truly feel about why you are fat. I spent many a day in tears last summer when they told me I had to start taking prednisone again......no compassioin from drs or others as to why you DON"T want to take it. So you just go along with what everyone says. I managed to go 25 yr. without going to the dr. (except for pregnancies) and I'm very glad I did. But in the end, I had to succumb to the dreaded drug. Hey! We all get to rant today!!

Hi Carol,

My husband has had to take prednisone for "bursts" when his asthma has been bad. I've never had to take it myself.

If it were me, I would be devastated to be getting things sorted out in my head regarding weight and yet taking this drug that undermines any good progress. Have you googled to see if there is a way to counteract the weight gain?

As I get older, I am more receptive to alternate treatments. I was recently upset because I realized that my doctor never recommends supplements and I took anti-inflammatories for months for my bursitis in my arm (which was almost unusable!) and it never got all the way better. Call it coincidence, but taking glucosamine cleared up what the drugs did not.

I'm not saying that there is something besides Prednisone, but rather something that may help counteract the weight issue.

Just thinking about you, and how understandably upsetting this has been. :hug:

Hi all,

I am in a posting frenzy it seems, so I am writing separate posts for different subjects, to keep my head clear and so you can scroll on past if it bores you to tears!

I don't think I mentioned here on the board that I stopped seeing my counselor several weeks ago. At first I felt very fortunate that I had found someone who was supportive of the Overcoming Overeating approach (I thought!), but as time went on, I found that she was not so supportive, and that she didn't really get it. She kept referring to Overcoming Overeating as something I had tried already, that supposedly hadn't worked, and it was time to do food diaries and ban certain foods from the house again. I fought like a mad woman when these ideas were brought up. And all that from someone who had never read the book!

Sometimes I would become so angry with the things she would say. She would keep saying that the true definition of insanity is to keep doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result, and then suggest that I start strictly monitoring my food or even restricting my food. Hello, past experience shows that this will send me over the edge with bingeing! Would it not be crazy to expect a different result this time?

Anyway, I would not call my time with her a waste, but I did have to call an end to the sessions when our insurance changed. Ironically, this was the week after she agreed to finally read the book. I was actually relieved. I don't understand how someone who has a background in adult eating disorders has such a hard time with the concept, and would have a patient come in weekly (for months!) who lives around this book, and she didn't even read it.

I was disappointed because otherwise, I really liked her.

Wiffle, When I went back to the dr. for the first time in 25+ yr (that is for treatment for sarcoidosis) I had been taking several natural supplements such as COQ10, garlic, lutien, billberry (my mom and I have always had bad eyes but my mom ended up with macular degeneration) and my first dr. took me off everything.......he was very anti herbs. So when I went to Mayo I just gradually started taking them again without discussing it with the dr. I also take fosamax for high blood calcium.....I know, it's complicated. 25 yr. ago I begged for something other than prednisone and still 25 yr. later there is nothing else they recommed. What would you google to find out about the things you were talking about. I have read only one book by Eugenia somebody on prednisone and how to live with it. She was a professional muscian and went on a very strict diet to keep from gaining.

Wiffle, You should recommend The Overfed Head by Rob Stevens......really short and he really gets his point across. Best IE book I have read and I think I've read them all.

Forgot to say my dh is a veterinarian with very bad joints and has been taking the glucosamine-condrioton for years and loves it.

There is another thread on here ....Starvation Mode.......where they are discussing the idea of calories in calories out (most would agree with that) and I wrote the following.
All this is very interesting but my question is.......Why from the time I was about 12 (I was a chubby child who grew thin by then) did I never think about food and really not get that much exercise (I was in school all day long) and stay thin? My first problem started when I took birth control pills right before my wedding. Even then I lost 10lb as soon as I got home from my honeymoon. After 10 pregnancies, illness and taking prednisone, reading hundreds of diet books......I really think dieting has been the problem. Why? When I started doing lots of fasting my problem became much worse. You can say calories in calories out but I don't think that's it.
Think I might be in hot water?

__________________

Does anyone have any good ideas for IE when driving long distances and eating out when away from home. Should you take food with you? Seems like a lot of mindless eating occurs on long car trips.

Bring stuff to do, I find if I have a book, or a puzzle or something I am less likely to eat out of boredom. Also with the idea sometimes you are just going to do it anyway, bring good stuff versus junk.

As for eating out. I like seltzer so I try and have a salad and a glass of water or seltzer or something first. Takes the edge off if I am hungry. Also I have no problem asking them to leave off certain thing.s (i.e. at applebees I ask them to take off the mashed potatoes or give me a double serving of veggies).

I haven't had a dessert in a restaurant in a while with the IE....usually too full.



Does anyone have any good ideas for IE when driving long distances and eating out when away from home. Should you take food with you? Seems like a lot of mindless eating occurs on long car trips.

Thanks Obi. I one of those "aha" moments last night. One of the things I loved it eat as a child and teen was homemade tomato soup. My mom just made it with milk and tomato juice. I ate it all the time even when I was sick. My dh doesn't like it so I just quit making it. The other thing is that it is hard to heat it without curdling, especially using home canned tomato juice. Yesterday it hit me that one of those hand blenders might work to smooth it out. I live in the country but there is a store called Johnson's One Stop about a 2 miles away and they had one. Did it work good! I fixed reubens for my family but because I don't eat cheese I made the soup with soy milk for myself. And I felt so energetic all night!

Does anyone have any good ideas for IE when driving long distances and eating out when away from home. Should you take food with you? Seems like a lot of mindless eating occurs on long car trips.

We drove twice last week to a city 250 miles from us (so 1000 miles total). On the first return trip, we stopped at a truck stop to use the restroom and we ended up buying candy and chips too. I felt so sick!

The second trip was a little more thought out and I washed some apples and packed a cooler with bottled water. That time we were not tempted for candy although I bought some V-8 at a restroom stop. That is not so bad!

My experience is that if it is in the car, it will get eaten, so I vow to think more and impulse buy at convenience stores less.

As for eating out when traveling, I've been viewing it as an opportunity to add new previously forbidden foods to my repertoire. There is a McDonald's smack dab in the middle of the turnpike, so we stopped there. I got a small wrap thing that they refered to as a "snack wrap". Funny how a "snack" is big enough to be an entree, but then they are the ones who wanted us to supersize everything, right? Anyway, this was a small flour tortilla with a chicken strip, a bit of lettuce, maybe some grated cheese and a little sauce. It was really good! I also got a small fry and that was more than enough but I ate it all anyway. :o

Sometimes I really need to remember to throw stuff away or give it to my husband. Especially when traveling and there is no fridge for leftovers.

How does everyone else handle traveling?

I found this on another thread somewhere and thought it was cool on 3fc

This is an excerpt from Linda Spangle's book 100 Days to Weight Loss. I think this might have been mentioned here before, but it bears repeating.

People who are interested in losing weight:
1. Stick with it until something better comes along
2. Take action only if they “feel like” doing it
3. Need to see results in order to stay motivated
4. Blame people or circumstances for their struggles
5. Easily give up whjen the face challenges.

People who are committed to losing weight:
1. STick with their plans no matter what
2. Take action whether they feel like doing it or not
3. Assume that if they stay motivated results will follow
4. Take responsibility for their own actions
5. Keep going in spite of challenges and setbacks

This is going to be kind of a rant/vent, sorry.


Ok, so I posted a while ago that I needed to weigh myself so today while exploring I found a ballys and got on the scale...problem...the scale only goes up to 350. At my last weigh in I was 356, I have lost a little but I am still not under 350. I stayed the same, or I gained....I decided to pick a happy medium and say I stayed the same. My clothes haven't gotten any tighter and if anything I feel better. I also think with the whole condo buying thing I was a little interupted.

So my goal is to get under 350 so I can use a regular scale. I am sticking to the IE, but uping my excercise. I have been doing 2 miles a day(WATP) , but I am going to add swimming and try and move up to 3 miles a day and see where I am in a month. Being in water is something I just love and miss alot.

I am not going crazy, but I am very focused.

I think that is a fine goal to have, Obi. I was wondering how your weigh-in came out because I remember you saying it was just about time. I'm glad you posted and let us know.

With the extra exercise, that weight should come off before you know it. :)

I have a question. How do you guys swtich from the diet mentality to the intuitive eating approach? I have read the book, but I just can't seem to let go of the 'you should only eat that if no one is looking' type of thinking.

For me I had already reached a point where I realized the cycling of dieting wasn't working for me and it was getting smaller and smaller. I was just fed up when I found the first IE thread and jumped in. Also it wasn't something that happened overnight. I was a little paranoid for a while, and now I just refuse to be held hostage by the cycle. Also I think once you read the Overfed head it is like a light bulb goes off.

And with any other "program" you have to make it work for you. Do what you need to make it work.

I still have gooes days and bad days, but overall I'm happy. LOL,even with my drama today...:carrot:

I have a question. How do you guys swtich from the diet mentality to the intuitive eating approach? I have read the book, but I just can't seem to let go of the 'you should only eat that if no one is looking' type of thinking.

Thanks for the wise words. I'm at the beginning of my journey but hopefully it will be a happy and successful one

So Usually when I have scale issues I wanna starve myseld and run 20 miles a day (total unrelastic). So this time I am sticking to the IE and walking in the morning (I have a 100 mile goal, right now.)

Anyway I walked 4 miles this morning, wasn't as horrible as i thought it would be. Had half a subway sandwich and some orange juice and I am ok. So my boss brings in his left over halloween candy and leaves it in my office (i share with 3 other people). At first I was horrified by the temptation then all I could think was I didn't just walk 4 miles :exercise: to waste it all on that junk.:nono: (i wish they had a talk to the hand smiley)

anyway, hope everyone else is having a good day.:carrot:

Good for you, Obi! Way to go!

Hi, everyone. We were away for the weekend and I made a few good decisions. One time I ordered a kids meal and another I insisted the my dh share with me. Then when everyone was ordering my favorite ice cream whcih I can only get about once every 2 yr. (Baskin Robbins........we don't live anywhere near one of their stores) I declined because I was full. Hope I can keep up with this because I'm like you, Obi, I want to fast and get thin quick. Thanksgiving brings a whole lot of relatives we hardly ever see and sure wish I could lose some weight quick. But I know better then that.......for now at least. ha!

Hey everyone!

It's been a while since I logged onto this thread and wanted to say hi and see how you all were doing?

Things are going a little slow here but I still enjoy everyone's posts and sharing ideas. I am rereading Naturally Thin by Eating More by Jean Antonello. It was my favorite health book before The Overfed Head. Wish I would have stuck to it all the years since I read it. I remember talking to Jean once and she told me it would take about 5 yr. to lose the 50lb I needed to lose. I thought that was way to long. Those 5 yr. went by so fast. I should have taken her word for it. Another question I think I might have asked before. As we get older I think we wake up more at night and sometimes I am so hungry I can't get back to sleep. Does this happen to anyone else?

Yes. I eat a piece of fruit and drink some water, then go back to sleep.

Thanks, Fidder, that is reassuring.

Well, I've said this before but maybe this thread is winding down. I know there is a lot of info out there just now about IE but I don't suppose many people are taking it seriously. Last fall there was quite a few articles by Stephen Hawks on IE and he said he was writing a book but I've never seen hide nor hare of it. I just think there has to be another way out there besides struggling so to lose weight. After all, as kids and even for some of us young adults we didn't struggle. All I know is that after I began reading diet book after diet book my problem got much worse. As Jean Antenello puts it....."There are other things to think about."

I think the thread will never be as active as others because there isn't alot to it. No rules. I don't have strange headaches or aches or wondering if I am eating too much or too little or the right thing, or the wrong thing. I don't have all the questions I would have with everything else.

I do think you should leave the thread up. For the moment when you eat too much ice cream and you need some accountability or just a question about how other deal with different situations.

Just seems the longer you are on IE, and the more confortable you get...working out what is good for you...the less you need to question.

-Obie

I think maybe "Intuitive Eating" isn't an intuitive enough title for some people. If you've read the book, you know what it is, but if you haven't it's not immediately clear what intuitive eating means. Maybe a title like "Dieting Without Rules" or "Non-Dieting" or "Losing Without Dieting" would be more effective.

I don't think it's so much the questioning but the reassurance from others that they are going through some of the same things......like being hungry in the night. Thanks again, Fiddler.

Well I have been eating ok, although funny thing has been happening. Since I've been cooking at home more, I have been eating a little more because it tastes so good. I've stuck to increasing the miles although not everyday. 4 miles ever other day and no knees pain and i feel good.

Ok, now for my question with most diets you you have specific foods to eat and I try and have diet soda when I want something bubbly. Do you still eat low fat, low carb, weight watchers or do you go for the regular version of whatever it is?

I've often questioned the wisdom of a message board or even a thread for people who have given up dieting, but on the other hand I long to talk to people who know what I am going through. Lord knows it is near impossible to find it in "real life". But to think about it enough to write about it, does that constitute obsessing about food?

In just over a week I will be visiting family who tend to be very judgmental as far as weight. I am the only overweight one. I think I have gained about 30 pounds since I last saw them and I am not proud. They will not appreciate the progress I've made in my head.

Between our upcoming trip and my husband being sent out of town on the spur of the moment, I binged a little the last two days. I don't feel secure in our house and so I am very nervous of crime when he is gone (not that he would be a good protector as he sleeps through everything - ha). Plus I usually travel with him and worry when he is gone.

Anyway, I ate when I wasn't hungry and ate past full, and was not willing to stop and think about it. Well, my husband returned today, then today my period started (surprise) and that probably was a big contributor because today was completely normal as far as food, and I would even call it a light appetite day.

Fiddler and Carol, I wake up in the night sometimes because I need to use the restroom or if I do not put my wrist braces on (carpal tunnel, I think) my arms hurt. My thoughts often turn to food. I don't indulge everytime now, but I wonder why it is so hard to just lay down and go to sleep. Seems like it always has to be something, food or tv, I guess I haven't mastered "just being".

I need to work on things.

The thing with me is that I am REALLY hungry when I wake at night....so much so that I can't sleep and get nauseous. I don't think it is the prednisone now because I'm on a really low dose. I am really having trouble being hungry in the evening and on and am raveonus by morning. This is real hunger I'm talking aboiut and not craving. My craving for sweets is nearly past. Obi, I posted a thread about splenda because as hard as I try to use it it makes me sick. Guess others have the same problelm I think soda sometimes has nutrasweet but I don't drink soda just cause I'm not crazy about it. After I eat breakfast, I'm usually satisfied until lunch but by 4pm the hunger starts in again. I can't get insurance because of long time health problems and don't like to go to the dr. anyway so stay away as much as possible. They usually don't have answers about silly things like hunger. Also most of the time I buy real foods. Just don't like the low carb, low fat things.

I just ordered the Overfed Head and I can't wait to read it. I've read Intuitive Eating by Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch, which I loved, so I can't wait to get Rob Steven's book. Obsidian I know you've read it, has anyone else? What did everyone think?

You can read the first chapter over at the thintuition website. With most diets books (intuitive eating included) you have some expert telling you what you should do with some case studies showing how their theories worked sprinkled in to make you go "oh wow" this must be something good.

Overfed head is a plain speak first person book. It isn't filled with charts and diagrams and blah blah blah. Also it just makes plain old common sense. I was trying IE before I read this, but this helped it all click together for me.

One thing I always mention is the end when he tell you he left off a FAQ section because you have to answer questions about yourself ...no one else can do that.

Big ole light bulb went off on that one....

Having said that I think I am more of an intuitive eating (the book) person. They mention nutrition and excercise in their book.

I use the Overfed head scale to decide how hungry I am and someone on here posted countin how much you have chewed to slow down your eating and enjoy your food.

I went through a few stages and I am sure other can chime in....
At first I...
I was afraid to eat forbidden things.(I remember eating a hamburger just because I could) I avoided eating things I had to eat on previous diets (salad)


Then..
I paid attention to when I wasn't hungry, realized most times I could cut my portions in half and not miss it. Chewed about 30 times to force myself to slow down and enjoy food. gave up eating in places where I rushed or hide what I ate (my car).


Now...
food isn't such a big deal anymore. This week I had a half eaten kit kat on a shelf for 2 or 3 days. I don't get scared if I have to eat out. I still have issues eating till I am satisfied, but I try to eat smaller portions and eat again later when I am hungry again. (I haven't had a foot long subway sandwich in months and couldn't imagine eating one now).

I will say for me, i have to excercise. I have been doing 4 miles every other day and I feel the difference (looking forward to the weigh in next month).

Ok, that was entirely too long, but felt like posting.:carrot:


I just ordered the Overfed Head and I can't wait to read it. I've read Intuitive Eating by Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch, which I loved, so I can't wait to get Rob Steven's book. Obsidian I know you've read it, has anyone else? What did everyone think?

Snowbunny, This is a good time in your life to go with IE. I have been dieting for 30 yr and believe if I had just followed this way I would not be 60lb overweight. I have 10 kids and used to lose some between pregnancies but then started doing a lot of fasting and really put on weight. I was an intuitive eater as a young adult. I have also battled prednisone (steroid) hunger because I have a chronic disease that I have had almost as long as I have been dieting.

Wavin' hello to everyone! I posted in the Living Maintenance Thread a few times and had this one recommended. I definitely belong here! I have tried the staying focused, counting calories, and exercising religiously before and it just is never sustainable for me.

My short history is I was never terribly overweight but just struggled with 10 pounds or so which I was constantly going up and down and up and down and well, you guys know. I read the Intuitive Eating book about 5 years ago, tossed my scale and since then have been working at it. While I can never say I've totally *arrived* I am MUCH MUCH better these days and really do eat what I want, stop when I'm satisfied at least most of the time.

I feel so very at home in myself and am so much less obsessed with food. I exercise, but for the joy of it and not for hours at a time and doing the things I enjoy, mostly walking and some simple floor stuff.

Anyway I've read back through at least part of this long thread and it's nice to see a group like this.

Welcome to the list Cindy.

Ok, I have a question, how much does what you read and what people tell you effect what you eat?

So over a month ago I bought precooked bbq ribs (I hadn't had ribs all summer, so I figured why not) I threw them in the freezer and didn't think about them until this weekend. Also I was on 3FC looking at a thread about all the foods you think are good for you and aren't....and I just looked at the ribs and thought they were a heart attack in a package....

The I thought ok, I hadn't planned on eating the whole package in one shot more like over 2-3 days, with veggies, and I wasn't going to eat ribs all day everyday...

There was also a mention of jucies and such...and I realized i was slowly on the way to dieting again....I just think if I take everything in moderation and don't overeat....I should be ok...

Anyway, Ribs are done (no great desire to have them again anytime soon), making marinated grilled chicken and veggies tonight.

As for the working out. Taking that in moderation and I enjoy it more as a result. I set my goal for the week, and as long as I hit it...I am ok.

How is everyone else doign?:carrot:

:welcome3: Cindy. We can use all the help we can get! Obi, I think eveyone has a different idea about what we should eat. If you were doing Atkins the ribs would be fine as long as you used a sugar free sauce. Even drs are always changing their minds. I even change mine from week to week. You know how that goes......if you eat something often enough it loses its appeal. That always amazes me. I've been kind of discouraged lately because I have been really hungry. Such a learning process this is!!!!

Cindy, I just read your intro and would never have guessed by your picture that you were in your 50's like me! And later you said you had been married 30 some years. I have been married 37 yr and have 10 kids. My dh is a veterinarian. Sounds like your job keeps you busy. Write often if you can!

Hi all, and welcome to Cindy!

I have a couple of questions for you who have read more than me.

First, I see some of you concerned with whether or not a food is healthy. When I read Overcoming Overeating, I took from that that I shouldn't be too concerned with if something was healthy or not. So with the actual Intuitive Eating approach, are you supposed to go ahead and eat all those things you wanted but had told yourself you couldn't have? Because that is how I gained the weight I expected to gain by starting this (and may be losing some now, according to my wedding rings - I do not weigh). So ice cream and burgers were so "bad" for so many years so I legalized them by permitting myself to eat them at will, while learning to listen to my body signals.

So is that the same as with Intuitive Eating (the book)?

Also, how have you all handled alcohol? I read a discussion long ago where some people felt that alcohol should be avoided because it can make one eat more, but then normal people drink alcohol and overeat from time to time, so why not?

Anyway, I guess I have legalized alcohol rather recently and really had too much of it. I actually determined how much would give me a headache (I am prone to migraines). Now it is not such a thrill and if anything I enjoy being away from it. Not to say that I won't have more from time to time! But to just have it whenever I felt like it and not explain it to anyone was very interesting. I will be starting a short term job soon and so it was good timing to get the whole alcohol "legalization" thing out of the way.

Lately I have been on a vegetable kick. We've been making whole juices: carrots, apples, bananas, cabbage, oranges, limes and the like (all together no less!) and adding a scoop of protein powder, or some yogurt and a little honey into the "superblender". Also I've been back at the Turbo Jam and did a whole 40 minute "cardio party" yesterday.

So has anyone else here gained a substantial amount of weight since starting Intuitive Eating or similar, that they attribute to the program? I cannot imagine trying to do this with a less than supportive mate. My husband has actually gained some weight with me on this but has wholeheartedly encouraged me.

Just one thought.......I've noticed since eating this way that foods I once thought of as irresistable have lost their pull. I have chocolate candy bars but they aren't very enticing anymore which REALLY baffles me. On the other hand what some people call healthy food really tastes great! Most IE books don't want you to put foods in catagoies which is totally opposite of most diet programs.

Hi all, and welcome to Cindy!

So with the actual Intuitive Eating approach, are you supposed to go ahead and eat all those things you wanted but had told yourself you couldn't have?

So is that the same as with Intuitive Eating (the book)?

I have to look at it again, but IE the book has a whole chapter on nutrition. The way I do it is if i don't have a craving for anything specific I try and eat/drink something "good". If I have a craving for something specific I eat it. With both I eat when I'm hungry and stop when I am satisfied (most of the time) LOL

Also, how have you all handled alcohol? I read a discussion long ago where some people felt that alcohol should be avoided because it can make one eat more, but then normal people drink alcohol and overeat from time to time, so why not?

I was never a big drinker, but I would agree with you

Also I've been back at the Turbo Jam and did a whole 40 minute "cardio party" yesterday.

So has anyone else here gained a substantial amount of weight since starting Intuitive Eating or similar, that they attribute to the program?

I haven't gained any, but haven't lost any either. I was thinking that with most weight loss programs you have an introductory perioid which is usually the extreme version of the plan, you lose a bunch of weight, but is also the hardest "phase" because you are changing the way you eat and adjusting to whatever the rules are.....

So with IE there is no extreme first phase (also no extreme weight loss to help with the marketing) but what if our "first phase" is just adjusting to doing IE in the first place. Eventually you reach "phase 2" where you're acclimated to the "plan" and kind of cost along till you reach your goal or move on to other phases.





Ok, kinda busy at work and don't want to lose this post, will follow up later

I still have problems throwing food away.......grew up not doing that and it has stuck. Like today.....I ate a long john and from the first bite I knew I didn't want it. Guess I'm learning not to take that first bite because my tastes have changed.

Wiffle- are you saying because you've been eating all your forbidden foods that you've gained weight with IE? I can see that happening for me, too, but I think once I know I really have permission to eat what I want then hopefully the weight will come off.

Here's my nickel/dime on some of this.

I really find that mustly I want good for me food - I have been going out for dinner a lot with work and it's interesting to watch what appeals to people. This gal I really like just wants different things than me - I honestly love simpler preparations and am not into the cheesy sauces and stuff that just draws her. I am ordering what I want and it just isn't that gunky stuff.

BUT, I do want it sometimes and then I just have some. Especially at first I think you have to really pay attention to how much you are really enjoying it and how much is the thrill of decadent behavior and just doing it.

I drink wine and enjoy martinis - the wine is ok in moderation, but the martini thing is just empty calories. But what the heck when that's what I want, I just do it. And it's true that like overeating and the miserable too full feeling, drinking too much isn't enjoyable later either (but kindof fun at the moment - LOL).

You just have to give up the good/bad categories, although for most of us our intellectual knowledge tells us which are whole foods and which are sugary/fatty things and so we know it anyway.

Aim for the good, not the perfect as the IE book says and know that's the way it should be to be working.

"Aim for the good, not the perfect as the IE book says and know that's the way it should be to be working."
I agree, Cindy, but it's just hard to except mistakes when you have been dieting for 30yr. My biggest problem right now is hunger....the stomach ache kind of hunger mostly at night and early in the morning. Fiddler says she eats a piece of fruit and drinks water in the night when she gets hungry. Some may say I'm not eating enough during the day but I have gained some weight so I don't think that's it. Also I have found that I really don't like to eat out maybe because I was raised in a farming community in NE and we nearly always ate at home. I just liked my mom's cooking (I wasn't overweight then either) and that's the way I cook now, nothing gourmet. One other thing: I get so frustrated when I eat even though hungry and it really isn't good but I have no choice maybe because I'm away from home or just eating someone else's food. I never know what to do when I'm hungry but nothing looks good. I don't have that problem at home. I wonder, too, if you have only 20lb to lose like Snowbunny, that you can relax a little more. I know I have only 60 to lose and not 100 but it feels like 100 sometimes and I feel like I might get up to that if I keep going the way I am.

Oh, by the way, any advice will be greatly appreciated.

Maybe good and bad are the wrong words, but i like to be concious of what I am eating, not in a restrictive way, just in a.....I want something to eat, I don't have a preference so I'll choose the apple over the donut. When I want the donut I eat it. Most times I tend toward healthy things. I think even "skinny" people eat badly and have high blood pressure and other issues. So I want to lose weight and be healthy.

Carol, why not see if you can find something that fills you up and maybe eat later at night? Are you anxious about something, could be something emotional manifesting as hunger? Or just eat something and go back to bed, doesn't matter what it is, just eat something and see how you feel?

When you talk about eating out, do you mean restaurants or just out and about and your hungry?

Work calling, more posting later.

I never know what to do when I'm hungry but nothing looks good.

I pass on food in that situation. I NEVER eat anything that doesn't look good to me. I figure being hungry for a while is not going to kill me, and if I really WERE in danger of starving any kind of food would look good to me.

Thanks, Fiddler. The hunger I'm speaking of is the ravenous kind associated with prednisone but my dose is so low now I hardly think that is it. But that's what it feels like. When I'm stessed or worried I lose my appetite. Yes, it is restaraunt eating I am talking about but it could be applied to eating at other peoples houses, too. Oh, and I just hate eating in the night. Then I feel like I need to brush my teeth. ha! Oh, Fiddler, when I get really hungry I feel nauseous and my stomach hurts......it's pretty uncomfortable. This morning when I woke up I drank some water and that helped a little.

Carol. I have hardly been home for several days and just skimmed through these posts quickly but wanted to let you know I've been thinking about what you said.

You do need to eat when you're hungry and if you're not, you're really breaking the major premise of intuitive eating. Are you getting enough protein? That makes a big difference for me - if you're ravenous like that, get up and fix some eggs or something or better yet just have them before you go to bed as part of a routine (or whatever something that sounds good to you). It's amazing to me if I have eggs and toast for breakfast, I just seem to feel better all day.

I have an early meeting at work and will be flying out tonight - I'll check in tomorrow and read this more thoroughly and respond more thoughtfully. :-)

Cindy, I have been on prednisone for over a year and I also take atenelol, norvasc and fosamax. I wonder if the meds might be causing some of the problems. Dr. usually don't give a lot of info just meds. I am trying to just stick with my local dr. even though Mayo is a great place. Yesterday, I started to take a little B6 because I read somewhere it helps with nausea and it did seem to work. I hope this might help with that ravenous hunger that sometimes feels like nausea.

Carol,

All of the meds you are on can cause nausea and/or stomach pain. You really should look up the side effects for yourself. You can find them on the internet if your doctor isn't telling you. Fosamax in particular has some very serious side effects that are currently generating a lot of lawsuits.

Things have been going good since I got this hunger/nausea under control. I can even ignore hunger if I'm busy and it feels good not to be a slave to hunger. I was able to post this morning before eating and that is a victory for me. I have lost the little weight that I had gained back.

That's great, Carol!

Not being a slave to hunger is one of the things I really like about my life now. Part of the reason I gave up on diets is because with all the counting points/calories, weighing, etc., they made me more preoccupied with eating, not less. And for some reason when I was on a "diet" being hungry was a really terrible thing, but now it just doesn't bother me to be hungry now and then. It's kind of like when I was a kid and if I was doing something really interesting I wouldn't want to come in for dinner. It's different when it's your own choice to be hungry instead of some diet making you hungry.

I over did it at lunch yesterday but got back in the groove with little supper. Probably it is good just to accept it and learn. We have a lot of company for the next 2 weeks and they have brought all kinds of food gifts......carmel popcorn, candy, homemade chex mix. I'm not bothered by any of it but the carmel popcorn and it's already loosing its pull.

Just received this free newsletter from the Normal Eating website:
Here's what doesn't work: Sit all tensed up, yell at yourself for again wanting to eat when not hungry, and try to force yourself to not want to. That's like telling yourself to not think about an elephant. Try it. Are you thinking about an elephant? Of course!

What does work is gentle acceptance and mindfulness. When you want to eat when you're not hungry, it means that something is bothering you - that something is causing you discomfort, and you don't know how to fix it. It does not mean that you're hopeless, that you'll never get this, that you can't do it, and that you should give up on Normal Eating. When you talk to yourself in a disparaging way, you just increase your desire to eat. For one thing, self-abuse makes you feel bad, and eating is what emotional eaters do when they feel bad. For another, trying to force yourself to not think about something or not do something just makes you want to do it more.

The first thing to do is calm yourself down. Often just sitting quietly and focusing on your breathing is a very effective way to do this. Some people use other ways to calm themselves down - draw a picture, play soothing music - whatever works for you. Note that if you say mean things to yourself, you will not be able to calm down. You'll just feel more agitated. Treat yourself as you would a child who is freaking out - your inner child. First you calm her down, then you ask her what's wrong.

When you're feeling less anxious and tense, you can think more clearly about what is setting off your desire to eat when not hungry. Think about what you're doing in that moment (or what you had been doing when the urge arose), what's going on in your life. Don't just sit and think, however. That's usually not very effective. It's better to think actively - for example, write in a journal, post in the Normal Eating forum, or call a friend. Thinking through writing or speaking improves your ability to stay focused on the issue, and you'll often realize things you wouldn't otherwise.

What's bothering you doesn't have to be a major emotional conflict requiring therapy (though sometimes it is). Perhaps you tend to eat in the evening after dinner because you don't know how else to relax, or because your partner isn't paying attention to you, or because you feel guilty relaxing and not being constantly productive. Perhaps you just had an argument with someone, and don't know what to do with your anger, or you feel guilty for being angry. Perhaps you have something to do that you don't want to do, and you're using eating as a means of procrastination. Perhaps your desire to eat comes from wanting a break from what you're doing, and you don't feel entitled to take one unless you're "doing" something. Or perhaps you're anxious about your ability to do well at something - for example, making a huge Thanksgiving feast for a large gathering of relatives!

Often when you realize what's behind the desire to eat, and accept that this underlying problem is making you feel bad, that alone is enough to quell the desire to eat. This is because a frequent reason for non-hunger eating is to avoid feeling bad or even acknowledging that you feel bad about something. But pretending that you never feel any unhappiness or discomfort doesn't make it so - the feelings just come out some other way. When you stop running from your feelings and let them surface, often the urge to eat will go away because the reason for eating has gone away - you're facing your feelings and sitting with them.

Other times, as you sit with your feelings and try to understand them, actions you can take will occur to you - things you can do to address the problem that are more effective than eating. For example, you might ask for help with an overwhelming project, assert your desire to not do something unpleasant or that you don't have time for, accept that you feel angry sometimes and that's okay, realize that you don't have to do everything perfectly to enjoy Thanksgiving with your family.

Over time, you will get better at calming yourself down, getting to the heart of the problem, and finding new ways to cope. As your ability to sit with discomfort increases, the frequency of your food cravings will diminish, your pauses will turn into stops, and you will become a Normal Eater.

Most importantly, be kind and gentle with yourself. Non-hunger eating urges are just signs of distress. You wouldn't berate a loved one for showing signs of distress, and neither should you berate yourself for showing signs of distress. If you yell at a child to stop crying, it makes her cry more, not less.

Don't expect to get instantly better, then berate yourself when you don't. Long-term change is incremental, not something that happens all of a sudden. If people could stop emotional eating by a simple decision, this wouldn't be such a widespread problem. In order to stop you must first be able to pause, so start by learning to pause and use that pause well.


Something to Try...
The next time you have an urge to eat when not hungry, take these steps:

Say to yourself, "I notice that I have a desire to eat, though I'm not hungry. Something must be bothering me. I need to pause and take care of myself." Accept the desire to eat; don't try to force it to go away. See it as a signal that something needs attention.
Spend a minimum of 5-10 minutes doing something calming and soothing that focuses your attention outside yourself. Focus on your body (for example, your breathing), what you see, what you hear, or what you feel on your skin. Get your attention out of your head, and into the present moment.
When you feel less agitated, spend 5-10 minutes writing or speaking about what's going on in your life at this moment, and how you feel about these things. Often in thinking about the situation, you will gain insights that suggest actions you can take to improve the situation.

I found another interesting email this morning. Thought you might like to read it. What do you think?

By Diana Lipson-Burge, RD

You've certainly heard several or all of these before. The question is, were you fooled? Don't feel bad if you were: when it comes to weight management, these are the biggest - and most commonly believed - myths around.

Are you willing to spend hard-earned dollars to maintain or improve your health? If so, you are a prime target for the modern day health and fitness quack. If you're interested in managing your weight (and how many people can say they aren't?) you're even more of a target.

Webster's dictionary defines "quacks" as those "whom with little or no foundation pretend to have skill or knowledge in a particular field." Today, quacks are alive, well and thriving in the health industry, eager to take advantage of our natural human tendency to want quick answers. Fraud and abuse now account for $50-$80 billion out of $800 billion spent annually on health care!

When it comes to weight loss, "quick fix" myths are the order of the day for quacks, who can appear in the form of anything from multi-million dollar corporations to well-meaning friends who have been sold a bill of goods by some other well-meaning source.

Here are the top 10 weight management myths that have been pounded into the heads of American consumers. Start un-learning them now, and you'll do yourself (and your weight) a big favor.

Myth #10 Fat makes you fat.

Fact: The only way a human being scientifically can gain 1 pound of fat (aside from metabolic disorder) is by eating 3500 calories on top of the calories used for their basal metabolic rate (BMR) and daily activities. It is irrelevant whether the calories are from carbohydrate, protein or fat. It can be 3500 calories of pure carbohydrate or pure protein or pure fat: it still adds up to the same thing. 3500 calories is 3500 calories, regardless of the source. Americans are more obese today than they have ever been in history, and we are all eating fat-free.

Myth # 9 We become toxic and gain weight if we combine carbohydrate and protein.

Fact: The idea of food combining has been around for over 100 years. Harvey and Marilyn Diamond popularized it in 1985. Proponents of food combining claim that if you eat carbohydrate and protein together, it will rot in your stomach and thus you will gain weight. If this were true, why are we not all overweight and dead from toxins? We have 3 different metabolic pathways that release different digestive enzymes so all food is digested. The only part of food that isn't digested is the fiber, and this is excreted into the colon and eliminated.

Myth # 8 Your stomach gets stretched out when you overeat and shrinks when you undereat.

Fact: It is true that your stomach expands when more food is in it, but once digested, your stomach returns to the original size. The reasons you feel your stomach "shrink" when you undereat is because when you are mindful about what you are eating, you become more conscious of the true amount of food you really need to get satiated, which isn't as much as most of us are conditioned to eat.

Myth # 7 If you eat after 6:00 or 7:00 pm, you will gain weight.

Fact: Once again, you can only gain 1 pound of fat by eating 3500 extra calories. If your total excess calories in a given period of time doesn't exceed 3500, how can food consumed in the evening be "chosen" to put fat on your body?

Myth #6 While dieting, vitamin and mineral supplements will give you more energy.

Fact: The only component that can give a human being sustained energy is a calorie - and calories are only found in food, and possibly some herbs. Since vitamins and minerals do not contain calories, they cannot give you energy unless you are severely deficient. This is unusual in the United States since most of us overeat. Vitamins and minerals are useful, however, for various health conditions, such as osteoporosis (calcium), anemia (iron), etc.

Myth #5 Sugar or carbohydrates make you gain weight.

Fact: Again, only if your overall caloric intake exceeds your output. But sugar and carbohydrates do burn off very quickly, making you hungrier and potentially leading you to eat more food. If you eat sugar or carbs with a little protein or fat, these will buffer the carbohydrate from burning off so quickly and keep you satiated longer (3-4 hours).

Myth #4 If you eat breakfast, you'll be hungrier all day and not lose weight.

Fact: Your body is like a furnace if you don't feed it fuel in the morning, it will never heat up and start burning calories until you eat. By not eating until noon, you have missed burning off 200-300 calories. This is why you could be hungrier on days that you eat breakfast: you are burning more calories.

Myth #3 Vegetables are a "free food". You can eat unlimited quantities and not gain weight.

Fact: This philosophy promotes many people to binge. While vegetables are low in calories and do not have fat, every food on earth has calories. Many vegetables have a low satiety level, which can lead to eating more quantity (calories) of other foods, and thus cause excess calorie consumption and weight gain. One of the most common binge foods that cause my clients to gain excessive weight is baby carrots.

Myth #2 Fast food is bad for you.

Fact: In this day and age of health and weight consciousness, fast food restaurants are being forced to decrease the fat content and improve the type of fat they're using by changing to unsaturated fat. They are providing more fruit and salad bars. Now, if we could get all restaurants to decrease the portions they serve us, we might really make progress toward better weight management.

Myth #1 The number one Myth... Restricting foods such as desserts or alcohol will help you lose weight.

Fact: This may be the #1 reason people gain rather than lose weight. It's been called Diet Deprivation Backlash (from Intuitive Eating by Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch, St. Martin's Press, 1995). This is what happens when we restrict certain foods and then when we do have a cookie, we subconsciously think we're never going to have one again, so we eat the whole box, planning to "start our diet tomorrow." We end up gaining weight from all the calories we consumed in our "backlash" thinking - not from eating that cookie!

Diana Lispon-Burge, RD, is owner and found of The Energy Resource is El Segundo, California. She works one-on-one with clients to reach their nutrition goals and also teaches workshops and lectures throughout California. She lectures on weight management to the Motion Picture and Television Fund, on disordered eating to adolescents and their parents, and on sports nutrition to a variety of professional sports teams. She can be reached at (310) 643-9016 or at: dianaburge@verizon.net

Health & Fitness Journal / BENNING'S - March/April 1999

Thanksgiving dinner went good. I stopped taking the B6 and the nausea came back but other than that the day was normal. The kids all seemed to have a great time. They always play football and basketball with whoever comes over. Quite a game but now I am really tired. I suppose I should expect that..........not getting any younger. I skipped my exercise this morning for the first time in a long time. Hope to get it done later though I know that it's better to do it first thing.

Thanksgiving was ok for me, I didn't bring home any left overs which was good. I didn't excercise as much I should have last week and my body is complaining...got back to it this morning so that is cool. I think I havebeen eating when I'm not hungry. Needed to say that....so back to the grind. Happy Holidays.

Feeling peppier today, though I have a slight sore throat. A lot of our company had various illnesses.........colds, diarhhea, vomitting. Hope we can stay clear of most of it. I found out last night at supper that my DIL knows about The Overfed Head. She was talking to my other DIL telling her that her SIL had taken the Thintuition course at the health club where she works in Chicago (she's in the BA part) and has lost weight. I never thought she had much to loose but my DIL seems really interested in it even though she's pg. Hope I can get her to compare notes. I was really flabbergasted when she brought it up. She's (my DIl) about 50lb overweight and very short......she was adopted from Korea. They have one little girl age 1 and are expecting in April 07.

Obi, I wish I could get rid of some leftovers but at least the meat is gone.

I have decided that I really like IE and will stick it out. I have read a few other diets but can't bring myself to cut out food groups, especially thing like fruit that are good for you. Just recently read part of the Sonoma diet and for the first 10 days they cut out fruit. That just seems so foreign to me. I still make mistakes like today when I ate a warm cookie in the afternoon and felt yuck after. But for the most part, I stick with small protions of food I like and usually it's good for me, too. That's what I crave.

Well, the sore throat turned into a good head cold. Last Feb. it took me a month to get over something like this.......maybe that's because of the prednisone. Not very peppy but I did get my exercise in first thing this morning. Just can't seem to get enough sleep. So I will lay low for a few days to see if I can shake this early. Of course, food doesn't look quite as appealing and maybe that's good!

Fiddler, I was thinking about something you said about not weighing and wondering why that was. Does it bother you to when you weigh? Just wondering.

Fiddler, I was thinking about something you said about not weighing and wondering why that was. Does it bother you to when you weigh? Just wondering.

It doesn't bother me. Or at least I don't think it would--it has been such a long time since I knew my weight that I'm not really sure. Mostly I just consider it kind of pointless and counterproductive, for the following reasons:


Keeping in mind that the objective is to lose fat, not weight, I just don't feel it's an accurate measure of my progress. My weight tends to fluctuate wildly. I once lost 14 pounds in 24 hours. There's no way that all, or even most, of that was fat.

I feel that not weighing puts me more in touch with my body, in keeping with basic IE principles. If you're not weighing, you have to pay more attention to how your body looks and feels to tell if you are making progress.

I put on muscle easily. When I work out a lot, it tends to stall my weightloss temporarily, even though I still lose inches and body fat percentage points. If I were going by the scale reading, it would discourage me from exercising. (In fact, how many times have you seen people on these boards say that they've decided not to exercise until they're near or at goal because it slows their weight loss?) There is more and more evidence coming to light that it is one's level of activity, rather than their weight, that determines their general health. That is, active fat people are more healthy than inactive thin people. It's a personal decision, and I'm not criticizing anyone else's choice, but for me the right choice is to exercise.

The people at the gym I go to do weigh me. I stand backwards on the scale so I don't see the number (it's silly, I know). They also tell me what the trend is, i.e. whether I'm losing, gaining, or staying the same. And I have told them that once I am under 200 they can tell me what I weigh. :)

Seems like as soon as I stop posting things go down hill, blah. My eating didn't do so badly, but i was doing the I'll excercise later or tomorrow, and it never comes.

Anyway, I've been having foot and knee problems and I went ot the doctor till I had a thought. I only had knee pain when I DIDN'T excercise. So I am back at it again...and guess what the knee and foot pain is better.

Questions. I know where doing IE and you can have what you want, but do you have something you just can't have in the house or cook because regardless of how hungry you are you still what to gobble it down?

I love my spaghetti, nothing special about it. I made it and it is sitting in the refrigerator. I have been moderating it, but I've been I seem much more aware of it than I am of other foods.

How is everyone else doing?

Hi, Obi! I think with IE the idea is if you allow all foods that they soon loose their specialness and I have found that to be true even though I have not lost weight. I have tried to go back to dieting but it just doesn't work anymore. I read The Sonoma Diet and when I got to the chapter where she says to throw out all sorts of food I thought, "Does she think I'm the only one living in this house?" Maybe it works for some. I remember what Gwen Shamblin said about changing the heart instead of trying to make the food behave and I have to agree. Anyway, it is an exciting journey so keep posting . Love those posts!

Forgot to say that right now I have a terrible cold which has really cut the appetite. I, too, have foot pain and sometimes it lasts a year but then goes away and I don't know why...just glad it does. Just recently the side of my left foot was really bothering me for probably 4 mo. but now it's gone. My mom was thin and she had foot and knee pain off an on, too, so who knows what causes it.

I know that if I were to get all the foods I like out of the house it would just make me want them that much more.

Besides, there's something empowering about having them there and having the choice to eat them, but choosing not to. I feel that's a more "adult" way to deal with food, instead of treating yourself like a little kid and putting it all out of reach by removing it from the house.

Just my opinion.... :)

Still not feeling up to par with this cold but the sneezing has at least lessened. My appetite is still low. Does anyone ever get constipated when they don't eat as much as usual? I haven't had trouble with that in a long time since I try to get in a lot of fiber. Also wondering if cold meds could cause it.

I like posting everyday. It helps me keep track of things. I just emailed a friend who is also doing IE and has had similar trouble with meds like me telling her that one of my problems is associating weight loss with illness. I wonder if that can become a subconscious distraction. It seems the only time I ever lost a lot of weight is when I was really sick and in the hospital. But I don't think of myself as an emotional eater. In fact, when I'm stressed I tend to avoid eating. I just enjoy good food and was thin until I started dieting and fasting. To get back to the old thinking seems to be a mighty hurdle to overcome.

I had stopped posting because I figured everyone didn't wanna read about boring ole me, but here whats been going on. Well remember how at the beginning of the month I was supposed to do all this excercising to hit my first goal (being able to use a scale that only went up to 350). Well in the middle of the month I started talking myself out of working out...I'll do it later, I'll do it tomorrow. You get the idea. Then my foot started to hurt. (and my other knee pain came back) Short story finally went to the dr...and he found some other unrelated problem that had nothing to do with the foot, and then told me I would need to see him regularly and you get the idea. So I have an epiphany(sp?) I can't stop working out. I mean I can, but then I feel crappy and since I don't want to feel crappy I need to work out...period. So I have been back at it with my walk away the pounds DVDS, and my knee and foot pain is gone. I am going to order Turbo Jam after Xmas is over.

As for eating, no problems, and I think my body is along for the ride as well. I came home last night and Friday is my no cooking night, so I picked up some fast food. I bought like the days before IE (I would think no way I can eat just a regular serving and buy 2) so I took it home ate half and the rest is sitting in the kitchen and I have no desire to touch it.

Obi, you are not boring! That's how we learn.......by reading how others are handling things. Way to go on the exercise and leaving the food behind. Someone had started a thread here saying there shouldn't be a McDonalds add on this site. I didn't answer but I love McDonalds. After 10 kids it has to be one of my favorites though I don't go there often anymore. The kids are nearly all grown up....youngest is 16. ha! I talkd to my son last night. He said they had a foot of snow in Milwaukee. He and some friends had walked to a Thai restaraunt downtown and said the food was awesome. Can't wait to visit him again.

Hi,
I'm Jo, and am a new chick to this entire site. Carol with the cute cat avatar posted a welcome to my intro and suggestion to join you all. I have not read all the intuitive eating posts but have skimmed most of them and it does seem like a good place to be. I have not read the books but I went to the Intuitive Eating website and read the basic principles. Makes sense to me. My intuitive stuff is definitely counter to what most people do (eating and otherwise!)
It's good to see all the support and encouragement going on here.

jo

There is an Intuitive Eating thread that has the first 350 posts that you might find interesting, Jo. Please share any or all of your experiences with IE.

So, is there an Intuitive Eating thread besides this one at Intuitive Eating #2? I didn't find any other. I have read throught the first 8 pages and *I like it.*
Please excuse my new chick questions but what is DH? I am amusing myself with possibilities: Designated Hooligan? Drunk Hunk? Desirable Handyman? Darn Hangeron? And what is TOM?
:?:
Thanks,
jo

So, is there an Intuitive Eating thread besides this one at Intuitive Eating #2? I didn't find any other. I have read throught the first 8 pages and *I like it.*
Please excuse my new chick questions but what is DH? I am amusing myself with possibilities: Designated Hooligan? Drunk Hunk? Desirable Handyman? Darn Hangeron? And what is TOM?
:?:
Thanks,
jo

DH Stands for Dear Husband.

The link below is a link to a post about all the acronyms. I was pretty confused until I happened on it.

http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=83585

Thanks for the link! That helps a lot. So many acronyms to learn!

I read something a while ago that try as I might I cannot find again online but it really rang true for me. It had to do with using the words "hunger" or "hungry." And what I read that rang true was pretty extreme, more extreme than what I read from the posts about distinguishing hunger from thinking about food -- it was really a physiological definition of hunger that made me think that most of us have probably never really been "hungry" even though we say we are. So I stopped using that word. The idea was that even though it's been a while since you've eaten and so you feel like it's time to eat again, and maybe your stomach is making noises, that's not hunger. That's conditioning. Hunger is a long ways away. It's not as long away as starving, but still, it's a long ways away. I find it helpful to keep that in mind. I may not have really been "hungry," at since I was 14 or so (another story!)

Oh and what is the difference between "post reply" and "post quick reply?"
More later....
jo

Obi, could you post the link for the first IE thread for Jo? Then maybe you can tell me how to do that!!!

Oh and what is the difference between "post reply" and "post quick reply?"
More later....
jo


Post quick reply-just a message, no fancy text or smileys

post reply you seem to get more options in formatting and adding smiley faces

Here is the link for the First IE Post.

http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=90266


And the first chapter for the overfed Head
scroll to the bottom of the page
http://www.thintuition.com/thintuition.php?section_id=10

Thanks - I have read the first chapter. Yep, it all rings true (but I probably still won't use the words "hungry" or "hunger" for myself.) but yes, it makes complete sense. You listen to what you need.
And that is very different for everyone.
That's why those prescribed diets don't work so well for everyone; because everyone is different, and if we just listened to what our bodies need it would be fine, and it would be unique, not like that list of requirements that many diets prescribe for us, as if we are all the same! I know that I need very very little. I am the Honda Civic Hybrid of human metabolism; which is kind of cool, and I just need to act accordingly. Why keep filling up with gas you don't need, right?
Peace,
jo

I think on the weekend my stomach is a little free....I had wheatena for breakfast, pizza for lunch and a big bowl of vegetables for dinner and water all through out the day. A lot different from the salads and fruit Ihave been eating during the week. Maybe it was break time? Friday is my weigh in so will see how it goes.

Foot pain is just about gone. I know the doctor was completely wrong so won't be going back to him.

So I was readling a little of the old thread and some review of the IE book on amazon, and no both there was a question of do you actually lose weight doing this or are you just making peace with food? Thoughts?

Obi, I think that you have read The Overfed Head by Rob Stevens. He lost 140lb in a year and a half. My DIL has a SIL who has lost weight as she attends the classes Rob sponsors at a health club in Chicago. So I do think you can lose weight. Even Fiddler who posts here sometimes has gone from a size 24 to a 16. She recently posted that she had gone from an 18 which is below her name to a 16. Hurrah for her!!! I haven't lost weight yet but I take prednisone so I am being patient with myself. I do think this works and have tried to go back to dieting and just can't do it. Too many good foods are left out on diets even healthy foods like fruit.

I would like to put the IE thread at the bottom of my post when answering intoductions. I don't want it there all the time but just at that time. Can you tell me how to do that?

So I was readling a little of the old thread and some review of the IE book on amazon, and no both there was a question of do you actually lose weight doing this or are you just making peace with food? Thoughts?


I will be the first to admit that I haven't read all the books. This way of eating is something I started doing on my own, and IE is the closest fit for what to call it.

I have lost a lot of weight. But I suspect that I let myself get a lot hungrier before I eat than some of you do. Jo posted a reply earlier about the difference between being conditioned to want food and true hunger. I believe it is a valid distinction and I try to eat only when I am truly hungry. I don't have a family that I have to plan to meals around, so I have it easier in that respect than some of you.

And even though I eat whatever I want, I have conditioned myself to want mostly healthy foods. Knowing how to cook a wide variety of foods is a huge help. I don't use any kind of "diet" substitute ingredients, but I do lean toward cooking ethnic cuisines that rely heavily on vegetables and complex carbs. I also take into consideration how the food is going to make me feel after I eat it. Therefore, I rarely want fast food or processed foods because they make me feel icky after I eat them, and it's just not worth it.

:)

I have been feeling a distinct lack of motivation for the past week. :(

I'm not sure if it's related to a new med I'm taking, or if I'm coming down with a cold, or if I'm just discouraged with how much weight I still need to lose to reach my goal (I'm guessing about 80 pounds).

In any case, I've now hit that no-man's-land between plus sizes and regular sizes so I can't find anything that fits, and that in itself is discouraging.

I'll stop whining now.

Does anyone have any idea why whenever I log on to 3 fat chicks my computer starts to sound like it's going to take off and my CPU usage goes up to 100%? It doesn't do this with other web sites.

There are quite a few pop ups here but don't know if that might be it as I'm not much good at computers.

I have been feeling a distinct lack of motivation for the past week. :(

I'm not sure if it's related to a new med I'm taking, or if I'm coming down with a cold, or if I'm just discouraged with how much weight I still need to lose to reach my goal (I'm guessing about 80 pounds).

In any case, I've now hit that no-man's-land between plus sizes and regular sizes so I can't find anything that fits, and that in itself is discouraging.

I'll stop whining now.
:dust:

First your not whining. If it is how you feel that is perfectly ok. I have to say your an inspiration to me so be proud of what you have accomplished so far and focus on that. Also it might help to think about getting to a size 14 rather than all the way to a size 8.
I haven't been a size 16 since I was in high school. So can't help you there.

Does anyone have any idea why whenever I log on to 3 fat chicks my computer starts to sound like it's going to take off and my CPU usage goes up to 100%? It doesn't do this with other web sites.

I do computers for a living so.....w

Do you have Dial Up or some form of High speed internet (DSL, or cable modem). If you are trying to load this thread it may be that we have 25 pages that are loading everytime you view it. I actually think it is time for an IE #3.

Let me know which we have.

Obi, You can start a new thread. Just let me know where to go.

Thanks, Obi. You've made me feel much better. :)

i have high speed dsl here.
actually right now my computer is ok after I logged off, then went directly to the last page instead of starting at the beginning of Intuitive Eating #2, and logged back on again.

On the subject of Intuitive Eating, I read some discussion about thinking like a kid and I can identify with that. I think that as a child I intuitively liked the right kinds of foods. Meaning the right kinds for me. Has anyone else read the Eat Right 4 Your Type info? I was really blown away to notice that many of the foods I instinctively did not like, turn out to be foods I am not supposed to have for my blood type anyway! Unfortunately those were the foods I kept being fed by my mother (meat and potatoes.) And I also do better avoiding wheat, which I was never big on either. I remember being 12 and noticing that every Sunday I'd feel like crap. I figured out what was different on Sundays was that every Sunday after we came home from church my mother would make pancakes. Other days I'd just eat something like a can of soup for breakfast (I have always hated "breakfast food" so I'd just find something else) but on Sundays we had to eat those blasted pancakes. I announced that I didn't want to eat them anymore and voila- I started feeling better on Sundays! So anyway, I think there's a lot of inner wisdom that we have as kids but then we get conditioned away from it so sometimes it's hard to get it back.

Jo, I have never like breakfast either and it used to drive my mom nuts until she let me eat soup and other nonbreakfast food. My favorite was homemade veggie soup which I used to eat often.

I don't eat eggs so made breakfast a waste of time since most people seem to love scrambled egges. For years I stuck to pancakes when possible, but when I went on atkinds that ended I realized I didn't like they way they made me feel afterwards. So I pretty much eat whatever, although I just discovered egg whites and when I have to have something "breakfasty" I alternate between those and wheatena.

Oh, I am glad I am not the only breakfast food rebel. You know what I think is funny? How the addition of "and eggs" makes anything an acceptable breakfast food. (People are such sheep!!)
Pork chops = not a breakfast food.
Pork chops and eggs = breakfast food.
Burrito with beans and cheese = not a breakfast food
Burrito with beans and cheese and egg = breakfast food.

That is just SILLY

I wanted to share something that I read that I thought was interesting.

Hopefully I can help. It sounds like some perfectionism is sneaking up on you. IE isn't about doing it perfectly. It's about taking care of yourself, learning from more difficult times, and moving on without guilt when you do overeat. My experience (I've been doing IE for about 6 years) is that I strayed from IE often but with each binge or overeating episode the time it took me to get back to IE was shorter and shorter. These days I still have the occasional times that I overeat for whatever reason, and I recognize it, try to figure out what happened, and then I move on. This means I don't do any extra exercise, I don't skip meals and I don't feel guilty and beat myself up. Try being a little kinder to yourself.

Think about this - you said you feel guilty and disappointed in yourself and then you punish yourself by eating that way all weekend. Consider yourself as a small child. When you were learning a new behavior (which is what IE is for most of us) such as eating with a fork, if you put the fork in your mouth backwards or dropped it, did your parents get mad and punish you? Did they take the fork away. Hopefully not. They would just encourage you to try again, having patience and understanding. Whenever I hear my own self-talk or start feeling guilty about what I ate, I ask myself if I would treat a small child that way. Your subconscious acts like a small child and believes everything you tell it.

One other thing you mentioned was that IE is hard work. I won't argue with you on that, but maybe you are working too hard as well. There are several behaviors and actions that an Intuitive Eater takes every day, but after a while these things are natural and you don't have to constantly think about it. What I recommend to my clients is to look at one step, for example, asking if you are hungry before you eat. Just focus on that. Don't worry about the rest. When you get that down, then start working on feeling fullness. You have the rest of your life to get this and when you do you will be so glad you took the journey. Even better, for the rest of your life you can eat the foods you love, even every day!

I hope this helps.

Thanks!
Gillian

Gillian Hood-Gabrielson, MS, ACSM
Healthier Outcomes

I'm not a breakfast food eater either. I do like eggs, just not for breakfast. But I don't like cereal at all, either hot or cold. And stuff like pancakes or toast and jam just makes me feel icky afterwards.

I usually have some sort of a salad for breakfast.

I thought about it alittle bit more. Depending on my schedule for the day I more often than not skip breakfast during the week. I just wait a little while longer and go to "lunch" yes I know it is the most important meal of the day but I kinda think if there isn't anything I want to eat it is a waste and I would rather wait. I haven't felt any difference and I usually for better for it.

Okay, so I actually do like breakfast. I make myself eat it every day because I am always hungry when I wake up and I have heard several times that it is very bad to skip meals. There is a lot of different kinds of cereal out there( I love cereal)..have you guys looked at your options?

I'm usually hungry right away but can't have calcium so I use soy milk and whatever else looks good. Sometimes if I don't eat I get too hungry and then tend to overeat when I do eat. I was happy to find out that Westsoy Organic unsweetened has 4 gm of fiber which I really need.

I think with IE i eat when I'm hungry and because of years of not being interested in breakfast food i am just not interested in it very often. Also I am rarely hungry as soon as I wake up. It takes me about 3 hours or so before I start feeling hungry. I guess your energy is supposed to be lower or something, but I manage to knock out my 3 miles of walking and that actually make me feel better than eating something.

Okay, so I actually do like breakfast. I make myself eat it every day because I am always hungry when I wake up and I have heard several times that it is very bad to skip meals. There is a lot of different kinds of cereal out there( I love cereal)..have you guys looked at your options?

Obi, Do you walk outside? I see you're from NY and I'm sure it gets really cold there sometimes. Yesterday it seemed I was hungry all day and couldn't get full. Today is a new day. :)

Obi, Do you walk outside? I see you're from NY and I'm sure it gets really cold there sometimes. Yesterday it seemed I was hungry all day and couldn't get full. Today is a new day. :)

I do the walk away the pound tapes. Which means I walk no matter whats going on outside. I recently moved to the suburbs (of NJ) and am thinking about getting a bike since My complex is pretty big and not alot of car traffic.

I was having a bad day at work and ate some oreos (the minis they sell in vending machines) I knew what I was doing and didn't stop but hoping next time I can find something else to make me feel better.:^:

Hi! My name is Andrea and I'm new here. Carolr3639 invited me over from the introductions board. I've been following Dr. Fuhrman's Eat to Live program and I feel much better on it. However I find it difficult to completely stick to it and I find myself binging fairly often these days. I am completely addicted to sugar.

Anyway, when reading this last page I feel like I can totally relate to the entire breakfast thing. I can't eat when I first get up in the morning, but then by 10 a.m. or so I'm hungry and go for sugar. I need to curb this habit and I'm always at a loss of what to eat. I sometimes have Kashi Seven Grain cereal which I like, but I can't eat the same thing every day. I really like the whole idea of forgetting about 'breakfast' foods and just eat.

When do you all exercise? Last night I ran on the treadmill after I put my daughter down for the night and it worked out pretty well. I'm just worried I won't stick to it because I'm so tired at the end of the day.

Andrea,

It's great to have you here!

I think you will find that if you can cut out the sugar habit you might be less tired by the time you are ready to exercise. Also, once your body becomes accustomed to exercising at a certain time of day that will help too. :)

When do you all exercise? Last night I ran on the treadmill after I put my daughter down for the night and it worked out pretty well. I'm just worried I won't stick to it because I'm so tired at the end of the day.


I am actually switching from mornings (I go into work 3 days a week and I am more likely to clean when I first get up than after coming home at night, I know its wacky, but its seems to be what works) to night right now. I live alone so no kids or hubby to worry about. My one weakness is TV. Once its on I know I am not going to do anything, so as soon as I hit the door I put on my clothes and go to it. Then I watch or do whatever. I guess it is like a prize. No TV or computer till I work out.:carrot:

Ok the other thing is there a few view on how IE works. from what I have observed on out thread....

1. you eat what you have a taste for and your body will naturally go towards healthier sthings

2. You purposely pick healthier things and decide when to eat something "not healthy"

So for me I purposely drink water with just about all of my meals. I make sure I make sure I am getting enough fruits and vegetables everyday, and I try and keep "bad stuff" to one or 2 meals during the weekend (if I am craving it). Most times my body doesn't really have any specific cravings so I pick healthy stuff. If I crave someting I eat it. I just eat it in moderation. Food seems to fall off the pedestal once it is easily accessible.

I think I posted a while ago that IE doesn't have that instant 10 lb weight loss other plans have. It is really up to you.

Hi everyone! It has been a while since I posted. I guess a lot has been going on.

Before I start rambling, welcome to the new people!

First of all, we went to visit my family for Thanksgiving. They live in another state and haven't seen me in several years, during which I am sure I have gained weight. I don't weigh. Well I was petrified about what my mother would say as she has been judgmental in the past, even vocal about my weigh. It is although it reflects on her!

Anyway, when we arrived, one of the first things she said was that I look great! I was so relieved. There wasn't a negative comment out of her. I don't know if my husband emailed in advance, or if she was just happy, or what.

Anyway, I found it to be so easy to not overeat while on vacation. I guess there isn't any of the loneliness or boredom so the eating urge was non-existant.

My mother tried to force us both to eat things (well, offering things over and over and OVER!) and we just kept saying "no thanks" and let her deal with it.

Also I have started working part-time temp. This is something I have anticipated, just through February or so. This is also keeping me busy and not lonely.

I had to buy clothes to go to work, and I ordered from one of the catalog places I really like. All the pants came too big, but to be honest, I don't care. I suppose I wanted to have a smaller size hanging in the closet but to return them and reorder was just too much trouble and they are so danged comfortable anyway.

I went to our local bookstore, which is "Half Price Books" to look for The Overfed Head. I didn't find it, but I did find Feeding the Hungry Heart by Geneen Roth, but I haven't started it yet. We don't have a regular book store in town so I will wait for my next trip to a real mall to get The Overfed Head.

I have noticed that my wedding rings are coming off easier. It was a real dilemma to have them sized upwards or not. I just felt for so long that something was changing, that I held off on sizing them, and now they seem to be fitting a little better. That's a good sign. And, I feel good, and the big pants seem to be a little bigger.

Something about the pants, I had to resist the urge to buy pants that I hope would fit later. They aren't that expensive, so I can either have them altered or just buy more. I really hate wasting money though, be it food thrown away, or ordering what I really, really want to eat even if it costs $2 more or $10 more.

Anyway, that is the latest from me, I'm still reading what everyone else is up to.

I had a NSV today as I realized the pull most foods have lost for me. I have had a bag of Cheetos in my pantry for a month or so and I'm not tempted. I also used to buy a Cadbury Almond bar nearly every week and it is no longer calling my name. I don't think I've bought one for a month. Hurrah!! When you allow all foods they just loose their power. For exercise I do Bodyflex every day and have been working on doing it 2X per day.

Wiffle, For awhile they were offering The Overfed Head for free on the Thintuition website.

I had a NSV today as I realized the pull most foods have lost for me. I have had a bag of Cheetos in my pantry for a month or so and I'm not tempted. I also used to buy a Cadbury Almond bar nearly every week and it is no longer calling my name. I don't think I've bought one for a month. Hurrah!! When you allow all foods they just loose their power. For exercise I do Bodyflex every day and have been working on doing it 2X per day.
:bravo: :cp: :cb:

Congratulations and thank you for giving me a reason to have fun with the smileys

Wiffle, For awhile they were offering The Overfed Head for free on the Thintuition website.

Thanks, Carolr. I never thought to look at the website. I have only heard of it in this thread. It doesn't seem to be free now.

I love Cadbury bars too, especially the fruit and nut.

Like you, as time goes on I have also gravitated away from the forbidden foods and more towards the good stuff. I haven't been reading labels either. I have been really pleased with my husband because he has tried some new foods too and has accepted things like berries, etc. as foods. This makes it easier for me since he is eating better now too. We even make food together now since I am working and we are sharing duties.

Derogatory Exclamation! I just composed a thoughtful post (I thought so) and lost it - again! - because even though I had logged in, this site told me I had to refresh and log in again! Why do I have to keep logging in so frequently? I have never seen a board do that before. Anyway, I will have to wait for the original inspiration to inspire me at another time since I lost my past post. But really, why do I have to keep logging in all the time??
Hooooh-Shigh.
jo

Derogatory Exclamation! I just composed a thoughtful post (I thought so) and lost it - again! - because even though I had logged in, this site told me I had to refresh and log in again! Why do I have to keep logging in so frequently? I have never seen a board do that before. Anyway, I will have to wait for the original inspiration to inspire me at another time since I lost my past post. But really, why do I have to keep logging in all the time??
Hooooh-Shigh.
jo

I don't know why it happens, but having lost many a post I know copy them into notepad or somewhere else, or compose in notepad or Word and then paste it in. This save me some headaches if I I accidentally close the windows or something goes wacky while posting.

Jo, Hope you can get your post back, at least in your own mind so that you can share it with us. Sometimes I will just forget to push post and then have to start over. It is frustrating. Obi, Thanks for the smileys.......love those smileys. Wiffle. Hope you can find the book. Did you sign up for their free newsletter? I think it only comes about 4 times a year.

My preferences are definitely for the more healthy foods. I imagine that is how it would be for others; problem is -- what have we had to pick from for so long? Why is the "default" setting white bread, white rice, mayonnaise on sandwiches, etc.? Sure I go out of my way to make my own food and select carefully, but if you go out, want to get something quick, there it all is - the junk. And what about for kids?! I never had any kids but I always notice that the childrens menu at restaurants is so junky; what do they have to pick from? Corn dogs or fried chicken strips with french fries! Not a green vegetable on the list. It's hard for people to even know what their preferences are when they are choosing from such a narrow range of minimally nutritious foods.
I just went out for sushi with my boss for lunch - the crab for the rolls was drenched in mayonnaise, of course it was white rice, the spicy sauce for spicy tuna rolls was mayo-based; I guess they think this is how Americans like it. Waah! I did select things with no mayo and nothing fried, and I didn't eat all of the rice but geez.

Jo, Whenever I'm out I always ask for no mayo. I have never liked it. When I was a kid I didn't like butter either but I got used to that. Too bad. ha! I was really finicky back then.... a real intuitive eater. I even liked whole wheat bread and that was 50 yr ago. Sure would like to get that back. We lived in a small town in NE so we didn't got out to eat much. My mom was a good cook so I didn't mind. That was just the way it was. Guess she must have done it right because I was always thin until I started to have kids. I notice at McDonalds that you can get apple slices for kids now. That's an improvement.

Should have said that I did have one chubby period around age 11 but I grew 4 in. in a year and that took care of that.

Obi, Are you going to start a new thread?

I'll start one. It's here: http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?p=1492394#post1492394

And I'll lock this one!