Mini-Goals - Insignificant, yet significant, success!
07-06-2006, 01:59 PM
This morning, I had an appointment with a therapist for my teenaged son who (bless his heart) is a dear precious young man who stays out of trouble and is quite intelligent, but he flat-out refuses to do well in school. He doesn't like to do homework. Anyway ... today's appointment was to discuss putting him on ADHD/ADD medication. I am not convinced or thrilled about this, and I am equally as frustrated and angry that he wouldn't simply sit down and get his schoolwork done properly.
The whole morning was painted melancholy for me. By 10:30, I was dropping him off at home and heading off to work. I'd forgotten my lunch, and really really *really* wanted some warm comfort food (refined carbs and fat, preferably from a fast-food restaurant). Success #1: I staved off the mid-morning "I'm mad so I'm going to eat at you!" binge.
I also knew that if I didn't stop at a store on my way to work for something, I would make a terrible lunch choice at the work cafeteria (again, usually resulting in refined carbs and fat). I stopped at a grocery store and picked up a huge southwestern salad to bring to work ... romaine lettuce, tomatoes, red peppers, southwest chicken, roasted-corn salsa, tortilla-chip strips, and dressing. The whole salad had 700 calories, but I dumped out the crunchy tortilla chips immediately, and only used half of the dressing (probably shedding half of those fat calories). Success #2: found a way to make a decent in-a-pinch lunch choice.
It doesn't seem like much, but the fact that I didn't EAT when I was mad is HUGE. And the fact that I found a way to find a decent-enough lunch (and alter it so it was even healthier) made me feel like, no matter what my weigh-in is this week, I made the healthiest choice I could make, given the circumstances. :D
07-06-2006, 02:33 PM
It is indeed significant!! I have a tough time with finding a good alternatives when I forget my lunch...or i end up working until 11pm and need to eat something for dinner...or find something to tie me over. Any ideas anyone???YES!! this is huge!!..
I agree, there aren't any insignificant successes! Every good choice is significant, no matter how small. Getting to goal is a series of little unremarkable choices that - over time - add up to one huge whopping success. :carrot:
Good for you! :high:
07-06-2006, 02:38 PM
I always (well, usually) bring fresh vegetables to work, and I keep Laughing Cow cheese and Ryvita crackers at work. I also keep a sweet potato at my desk, because they never go bad and they're a great, filling snack (microwave and add salt and pepper).
Trader Joe's has some good healthy convenience-food options.
I pre-cook a lot of things, and reheat them on evenings I don't have time to cook ... soups, stews, chilis freeze well. Or else when I cook chicken or something, I cook more than enough and have a chicken breast the next evening for dinner.
07-06-2006, 02:47 PM
Hey, you are a better woman than I. I would have drowned myself in a Frosty, LOL. These are the successes that really count though! Staying on your diet for a week of good days is no feat compared to driving right on past McD's on a high-stress day!
07-06-2006, 02:54 PM
Good for you, phantastica! Every time I manage to make a healthy choice in a situation like that, I consider it a HUGE success! :carrot:
07-06-2006, 03:49 PM
That is a huge success and exactly what will help you throughout your journey. Each day is a test and the more right choices you make the better you will do. Congratulations. I considered it a success everytime I forego the fattening junk that I used to love to eat.
07-06-2006, 03:55 PM
Sorry to hear of the woes with your son. I had the exact same troubles with mine. He is very intelligent and I heard this over and over throughout his school years. He did take meds for ADHD in junior high, but didn't take them in HS because they made his stomach hurt and were stunting his growth. For male children it's a huge deal to them if they are smaller than the other kids. I will say that he's 20 yrs. old now, is in the Army Reserves and has a very good paying job. He plans to apply to the Highway Patrol after he turns 21. He's never been in any trouble. So, I know that although you are very worried about your son, chances are he'll turn out just fine.
07-06-2006, 04:01 PM
Thanks lilybelle ... it's so nice to hear other parents who have had similar situations. My son is 15 years old and hopefully fully grown. He stands 6'5", so I think he might be slightly relieved if the meds stunt any more growth. :D
Interestingly enough, my son is also drawn to protective services ... police officer, firefighter, etc.
I do regularly hear from teachers, authority figures, and other adults that I really don't have anything to worry about with him, that he'll turn out fine, especially since he's very anti-drug/drinking/smoking and has a good attitude.
07-06-2006, 04:24 PM
Phantastica, That's a TALLLLLLL boy you got there! Sounds to me you've got a lot of really great healthy eating choices ideas under your hat. Just make any and all emotional eating not an option and you will be there in no time at all. :)
07-06-2006, 04:35 PM
How could something that big be insignificant?? You handled it way better than most people would of, including me. You should be very proud of yourself!
07-06-2006, 05:19 PM
I think that's great! Finding ways to stop our demons is a huge part of this battle!
I resisted a depression related binge yesterday and seem to be teetering on the edge of "why should I care" today, but I know that I just need to get past this and food won't really make me feel better!!!
07-06-2006, 06:22 PM
When I make great choices like that, I smile all evening and into the night :goodvibes ALLRIGHT
We need to start giving ourselves all the credit we deserve
07-06-2006, 08:08 PM
I agree with what everyone else said, it's not insignificant (what a word to spell!). It's a huge deal! Those choices are what add up to help you lose.
Sounds like you have a great kid there! Don't worry...they all learn differently, and his learning style is away from the norm...Don't make a rush decision to label him ADHD or ADD or anything like that. I think alot of times it's an excuse to make kids conform to the norm. No kid should be made to do that! Specially if he's showing potential and high intelligence!!!
07-10-2006, 08:40 PM
That's great. I can relate, except for the having a son part. I work at a department store and there's a little grab n go food corner/restaurant, and it's hard not to make a bad eating choice when all there is to chose from in my price range is a pretzel, calzone or hotdog. And sometimes I work that department and have to bake cookies in the morning which is so tempting. But we hold in there and it might not seem like the greatest accomplishment to someone else, but it means so much to us to say, "Hey, I made a healthy choice today!". Keep it up. You go girl!
07-11-2006, 01:11 PM
WTG on making it through a rough day without making a bad food choice!!! I agree with the others, that's a big deal!! I too have a son who is 15 and takes ADD medications, only on school days for the most part, he's been taking them for about a year and I too always heard "he'd get straight A's if he just paid attention". All through grade school he was labeled as a kid who just didn't always pay attention, who was basically behaviorally off task, but when he reached middle school and had to juggle all those different classes and homework it was apparent it was an even bigger struggle for him. I went through a divorce at the same time and so I thought that maybe he was having a hard time with that and that was affecting his school work, so I started taking him to counseling, after 6 months or more at that he came home from school one day with his report card and said to me "You just don't understand, I DID try, I can't explain it but I did!" I felt so bad for him and to me that didn't sound like a kid who was just goofing off and not trying, it was really hard for me to understand because I always did really well in school and had no trouble getting my homework done, but I talked to the counselor and she sent me the checklist for ADD and my son fit into most of them and had his whole life. Now he's known about it long enough he can even spot things, he can't pay attention to what someone is saying if the TV is on too loud or there are other people talking in the background and he will stop you and say "I can't pay attention to you with all that background noise". The medication helped a lot but it wasn't enough to ease him into all passing grades, and we had to change them a bit before we found what worked right, but I transferred him to a great alternative high school here in town and that along with the medications were enough that he did great his freshman year!! It is hard when our kids are struggling so much, and it helps me too to hear stories like Lillybelles where the kids who struggled like my son does grew up and did well!! Hang in there, it sounds like you have a great boy there. Oh and my son has grown while on the med's, maybe because he doesn't take them except on school days, so there are a lot of days where they are out of school and they don't take them. They do upset his stomach sometimes and he does lose some weight when he's taking them, but he's not overly thin so it's never been enough to have to worry.