Hi guys.
I'm checking in.
Amazingly, food is currently the easiest part of my life. I can't believe it. I've got so much other personal growth stuff going on with my step work, therapy, church, and working with my sponsor and sponsees, the food has lost it's place of importance. I move through my food plan each day with ease and predictability. I keep my abstinence out of habit and fear of losing my sanity. For the first time, food is the least of my worries. It's a miracle.
I'm enjoying my smaller body. I haven't seen these shapes on my body for 6 years. It's like looking at somebody else in the mirror. I can even buy clothes at a really cool store in town--they carry my size. I just threw out my Lane Bryant coupons that were collecting dust on my dresser. It felt good.
My daughter really wanted to make jello today. I tried to talk her into getting the ready made stuff...not a chance. She was set on grape, and that was the only flavor that they didn't have in sugar free. So, we got the full sugar grape. Just watching her stir the purply sugary water made my teeth hurt. I could only imagine what all that sugar would feel like on my teeth, and the idea was really unappealing. When it finally set up and I was helping her spoon some into a bowl, I found that much of the sugar hadn't dissolved and created a sort of crunchy layer on the bottom. It was so gross. I'm so glad that my brain didn't want any part of it.