It sounds like you have access to a good setup.
1. There is no such thing as 'tone up'. Either you build muscle or you don't. Either you lose fat or you don't.
2. Men and women lift the same way, using the same exercises.
3. The rep range is determined by your goals. The rep range determines your intensity. Generally, it goes this way:
- endurance: higher reps (12-20), lower weights, 50-60% of 1 rep max
- mass: medium reps (8-12), medium weights, 70-80% of 1 rep max
- strength: low reps (1-6), high weights, 85-95% of 1 rep max
Plan your workouts to hit each of the goals at some point, not in the same workout, but through maybe a month. Right now, I am doing 2 endurance, then 2 mass, then 2 strength workouts. Because strength work is so heavy, the following workout should be light to give your muscles a chance to rest.
4. Don't lift every day. Alternate cardio days and lifting days. You need to recover in between, and that way you can focus on improving your cardio on cardio days. Make sure you warm up before lifting, and stretch afterwards. If you do cardio during the same workout as lifting, cardio should be done afterwards, and then it should be moderate only. Doing cardio before lifting tires your body out and you cannot give the lifting your all.
5. You can start with full body, compound exercises to get back into things. These would be- squats, lunges, bench press, lat pulldowns, and core work. Then you can add the isolation exercises in gradually- triceps, biceps and calves.
Chest: you have benches- flat and incline. I personally don't use the decline as I have hypertension. Use both to work different areas of the chest. Use the bench to do dumbbell flyes and pullovers.
Upper back: lat pulldowns, don't worry about this exercise giving you a huge back. This is determined by your genetics. You can also add bent over barbell rows and 1 arm rows with dumbbells.
Legs: squats and lunges are the best. Use the extensions and curls as isolation exercises.
Lower back: deadlifts and straight leg deadlifts, as well as pilate type work
Abs: yoga and pilate work, crunches, reverse crunches, etc
Triceps: extensions are great; add kickbacks
Biceps: vary the type of curls- straight curl, hammer curls, concentration curls
Both biceps and triceps are worked during the chest and upper back exercises. They do not need a lot of isolation work, maybe 2-3 sets
Calves: calf raises in the machine you described, floor calf raises, one leg calf raise, and calf raise on a step or bar.
6. Increasing weights: there are many ways to split and periodize. Try different ways until you find what you like. During an exercise, you can go up in weight (BFL style), or up and down. I usually go up, ending at the highest, and ignore the going down part so the workout doesn't last too long. The highest weight is determined by what the goal is that day- endurance, mass or strength (low, medium or heavy).
Work with a weight until you can lift it comfortably for 8 reps. Then increase the weight. You won't be able to do it 8 times, so you start working at it until you can. That way you keep progressing in terms of the weight.
Hope this helps...
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