South Beach Diet - Wednesday *SNORK*




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Schatzi
03-22-2006, 08:54 AM
The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the
month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and
he takes his very life into his own hands! This is a
handy guide that should be as common as a driver's
license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, or
significant other!!



DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?
SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: Are you wearing that?
SAFER: Gee, you look good in brown.
SAFEST: WOW! Look at you!
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?
SAFER: What did I do wrong?
SAFEST: Here's fifty dollars.
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?
SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.
SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: What did you do all day?
SAFER: I hope you didn't overdo it today.
SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe!
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some more chocolate.

12 Things PMS Stands For:
1. Pass My Shotgun
2. Psychotic Mood Shift
3. Perpetual Munching Spree
4. Puffy Mid-Section
5. People Make me Sick
6. Provide Me with Sweets
7. Pardon My Sobbing
8. Pimples May Surface
9. Pass My Sweatpants
10. Plainly; Men Suck
11. Pack My Stuff........And my favorite one...
12. Potential Murder Suspect

Pass this onto all of your hormonal friends and those
who might need a good laugh! Or men who need a
warning! And remember: Money talks...but chocolate
sings.

Another thing to giggle about...

My husband, not happy with my mood swings, bought me a
mood ring the other day so he would be able to monitor
my moods. When I'm in a good mood, it turns green.
When I'm in a bad mood, it leaves a big red mark on
his forehead. Maybe next time he'll buy me diamonds.

Here, have some chocolate.


Ruthxxx
03-22-2006, 08:56 AM
Good advice, Schatzi!

batmomm2000
03-22-2006, 09:43 AM
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: looking good in that robe...:rofl: :rofl:


Sheba's Mom
03-22-2006, 02:16 PM
:rofl: :rofl: I love it, I love it!!! Amen and pass the chocolate!!:rofl: :rofl: