[mishakal30]

Well.. here it is, January 06 and I have started another diet. I was in the same place this time last year and at about the same weight too. I am not sure what will be different this time.. but I do know that I am finally tired of being fat. I was always unhappy about my weight but I was never tired of it until now. Maybe that will be what is different this time.

All my life I have used weight as a shield from the rest of the world. I didn't have to deal with people and with life if I was fat. I could sort of blend into the background... be invisible. All my failures I blamed on the weight.. when I was unhappy I blamed it on the weight... it was like this blanket excuse that made me less responsible for the decisions I had made in my life.

I am 38 now and in good health... but I can't stand to look at myself in the mirror. I hate meeting new people because I feel embarrassed at how I look and I don't do a lot of the things I want to do because I feel like I am too fat.

I am an overeater and have always been that way. When I have a bad day, all I can think about is coming home and eating all these things that are bad for me. When I feel sad or lonely, I eat. I have had times when I eat so much that it is uncomfortable for me to sit so I have to lie down. When it is all over I think to myself "what on earth have you done? How is this helping you?" It helps because in my life I have learned to self medicate with food. Some people use alchohol, some use drugs... I use food.

I am 1.5 weeks into this thing. I had a stellar week last week. I ate 6 small meals a day and I have been alternating between the "Biggest Loser" workout DVD and the eliptical machine that has been gathering dust for the last 3 months. I actually lost 8 lbs last week and I am still on track this week (new personal record for me)... I miss food though.. ALOT.

I guess that's why I am here.. for help and support in the journey ahead. The eating right and exercising I can do.. now I have to learn how to deal with stress and other things without turning to the only thing I know... food.

[CanadianSmile]

Hi there,
Welcome to the boards, I am also new to the boards I started my diet officially last Monday. Congrats on the 8 pound weight loss that is great!!
I just bought the Biggest Loser book, so I am hoping that will help me in my weight loss, the people on that show really inspire me! I have been using my exercise bike everynight and I hope to see some results soon.....
I completely understand your feelings, and I also overeat, my worst time is at night after dinner. I could have a full dinner and then an hour later I could eat chips, cookies, whatever is around. I am trying to turn that around now and the past three nights I have been successful and have not eaten anything after dinner. I hope I am on a good start!
You sound like you are doing good and are starting off with a positive attitude, good luck!

[mishakal30]

CanadianSmile... My worst times is at night too. I will be watching tv and I will start thinking about all the food I would like to eat. Once Christmas was over, I cleared the house of all the junk food and replaced it with healthy snacks. I am hoping that will help things along for me.

Congrats on your weight loss as well.. I know how much of a struggle it can be... but we can support each other through this and we WILL be thin

[CanadianSmile]

So how have you been doing with the night time eating? Sticking with the healthy snacks?
Have you been watching the Biggest Loser? That one couple last night looked amazing!
Well good luck and keep up the good work!

[ellis]

mishakal, welcome!
I can relate to everything you wrote, and I feel your pain, hon. You're doing well... 1 1/2 weeks is HUGE! I hope that you have the confidence to continue... you can do this. You're going to head into 40 looking fabulous and feeling great.

Canadiansmile, good going with the exercise bike!!

[MoNewEngland]

Hi. I thought you might like to join our group that just started on January 16th. We're just a small group and you can find the thread under Support Groups....I think the heading is "January 16th just started...join me"
or something like that. We'd love to have new members as we just started it up last week. Hopefully we'll see you over there.

Maureen

[mishakal30]

canadiansmile... I have been doing very well with the eating the past week... mostly because I have been on nights.. lol. I am off now until Friday but I am hoping that I will be able to keep busy enough so I won't think about eating all the time. It helps that there is no junk food in the house too How are things with you?

Ellis.. thanks for the support and vote of confidence.. it really means a lot

MoNewengland.. thanks .. I will check out the thread