HI everyone! To make things short, i'm a 5 feet 4 inch, (quite small) 22 year old male (I should had stated that since the beginning, and yes, we boys also go through these kinds of things, and please don't be a little bitter for the fact that we can drop some weight a little faster than females, the struggle is what we all have in common) and have dropped 80 pounds. My highest weight was 250 pounds and I'm now 170 and loving it! Still, I want to drop down to 135 pounds. However, someone at work who had not seen me for a few months was not surprised at my weight loss. She said I looked anorexic. I wonder if I will look anorexic at my dream weight and so I'm here depressed thinking if I should go lower to my ideal healthy weight. I have become severely sensitive to diet comments, and despite that everybody tells me I look good, I tend to worry more about what the negative people have to say, since I think there is more truth to their comments. My motivation is now very low from very high. I can't think positive, but i guess I want an excuse to overeat again. I don't know! I have mixed-up feelings. I have held back on life for a long time and I always say to myself, "I'll do that when I'm skinny." I want those days to be now, but I still have more weight to lose, and negative people have tried hard to sabotage my weight loss. Please...help me cope!
I am sorry that people's comments have been dragging you down. I know that having thoughts on your own do that enough, at least for me. Just hold on, that's the best advise I can give you. If you can make it through these tough times you will look back and be proud and make it through the next stuff easier. You are doing GREAT. Congratulations on your great success losing weight!!! You are an inspiration. Keep going, and keep you head up! Motivation comes and goes, just keep it up!
I doubt that you look anorexic, people will say anything to make you feel bad about your accomplishments. I think you'll look fab at 135 (pending that you're not like 6 feet tall that is, that might be really skinny, but you never know).
Keep coming around here. It is an endless supply of encouragement and people who can relate to what you're going through. I hope you have a wonderful night, you'll make it through!!!
I don't know...if this lady hasn't seen you since you lost 80 pounds it's going to be and obviously was a shock to her. 80 pounds is A LOT of weight off. I'm sure the comment was out of shock of seeing you one way and then seeing you a completely different way without seeing you during the process of losing. How could anyone not be surprised at such a loss?
How tall are you anyway? How quickly did you lose the weight? 170 doesn't sound anorexic. You should check your BMI to see what a good weight for you would be.
Don't worry about the negative comments. Do you feel good? Do you think you look good (since you've come so far). The only thing that matters is what you think and what is truly healthy for you. Don't be discouraged...anyone would be so happy to have lost so much weight. It is quite an accomplishment!
Continue to post and let us know what's going on.
Psychego - I reckon that woman was insanely jealous and hence called you annorexic. I'd be highly offended by that and probably would have made some nasty retort! But that's just me! Either be offended or take it as a huge compliment - you've done so much hard work that people are starting to think you're as thin as an annorexic (when clearly 170lbs is no annorexic weight). Whatever people say, keep on doing what you are doing and what makes you feel good - after all, they only have to look at you, they don't have to live in your skin or live your life for you! Remember that!
Thank You for your realistic and positive comments. You did make me ponder about the fact that she was just being mean....and also for the fact that not having seen me for a while was as shock to her since my face slimmed down and all those changes took place. ANd definitely, motivation comes and goes.
I exercised today, as I do six days out of the week. I find it to be really fun, and I wish I had begun a long time ago and not had let myself balloon up to 250. If anyone reading this post hesitates on beginning an exercise program, do not do so any longer. It is the key to healthy weight loss.
I am 5''4' and my ideal weight should be from 117 to 143. My dream weight is 135 or as a short term goal.....143!
When I was 14, I went from 185 to 128 lbs. It took 6 months and I did so very healthily. For some reason, seeing that at the time it was easy to eat less and exercise, I just decided to let myself go to 250 lbs. I have now learned from my mistakes. I will never make that mistake again. From time to time, I feel like getting that pity one gets from being fat and going back to the weight I was previously. More like a way to get back at people for not being pleased about my weight loss. But logically, who I am hurting is myself, my mental and physical health. At the end, who you have to please is yourself and it may sometimes be difficult because you tend to be a people pleaser. For example, in my case, I am sensitive to comments, despite that 90% of them are positive. As I read the comments left by these sweet ladies or gents, then you start to realize that yes, maybe people are jealous or may be truthful sometimes, but at the end, people will move on and pleasing them is just a way for you to be unhappy. As I was talking to another overweight co-worker, she mentioned something that although is full of sense, my little brain only focuses on the negative, but she said, "People will get on you for being fat and for being thin. You will never please them." And it's true. And despite that I do not have a eating disorder, an anorexic look may not be so bad at all. I am not promoting it or shunning it, but if I do look anorexic, then at the end, it is my health that counts more than my looks, so, to **** with what they think. I know, it's easy to say or else I would not be here seeking support, but you get stronger when you get feedback from others in our situation.
At a 80 lbs. loss, I guess I have been through a lot. I have been through the situation of having a jealous sister that calls me "Yellow AIDS patient." A father who brings home fattening goodies and is bothered by my weight loss. Co-workers who say my diet is silly, or that I'm wasting away. I have brushed those off, but the current one has been a bit harder and harsher on me. I will not succumb and all thanks to the replies! So far, I have not fell off the wagon. I allow myself a cheat day in which I eat what I want, and it has worked for me. It is important to seek support, such as posting here, to get over the hurdles. Remember that nothing tastes better than being slim!
Why is this reply to my own post so positive all of a sudden?! I exercised!
Motivation for me to start exercising. As long as you are doing it in a healthy way and have consulted with a doctor, do not worry about the comments. I know that's easier said than done, but it is jealousy. Another attractive woman for her to compete with. I am sure your attitude has improved now that you feel better about yourself and well, women *HATE* competition
Don't worry about the negative comments. It's like you said, they are trying to sabotage you. Some people don't like to see others doing good so they try to get you down so that they can say, "See, I knew she'd gain the weight back." or "She was too skinny anyway." You just keep doing what you're doing because it sounds like you are doing great.
I think that the others are onto something--she's probably a bit jealous. As long as you're following a healthy plan, then I wouldn't worry about her comments. I think that a lot of people don't like to acknowledge that they don't have your willpower, so instead of saying, "Wow, all your diet and exercise paid off and you look great!" they'll say something a little *****y.
As far as your goal weight, I would see what the healthy BMI range for your height is. Here's a link from the CDC. Once you're in that range, evaluate and see how you feel about losing any more weight.
So after reading your replies, I have healed a lot more. Thank all of you. I feel a bit odd for having registered to website named "3 fat chicks" for I'm not a chick, and so I deduce this website is exclusively for women. However, we are all human and weak and so therefore we all need support. I have an overweight sister, so it also hits close to home to see females struggle to lose weight.
It is tough being an overweight male as well, since we need to have athletic bodies. The societal pressures affect us just as much as women. I will keep you updated on my achievements, and I hope all of you are also successful and reach your goals.
There are other men here, this place is not just for women. You must not have seen the posts from Howie. He's lost a lot of weight and we all love him. But what I said still stands, you are doing great. You just keep doing what you're doing and don't worry about others.
This is definitely not a place just for women, so please stick around! I agree with everyone, you really are doing great and if your goal weight is a healthy weight for your body type, then that's all you need to know. That woman really has no idea what you've been through and really has no place to talk. Keep doing what you're doing, your motivation is inspiring!
When someone makes a mean comment about my weight loss, I usually think that it is because they are jealous that I have lost weight and look great and they prabably have body issus of their own and wish they were doing as good as I am. My dad made a comment to me the other day about how if I loose any more weight I will fall through the cracks in the floor. Which I did not appreciate at all, I am still not at my goal (which will hopefully get me into a size 4). I am not super skinny, I never want to be, I just want to be a little skinnier than I am now, and I want to be healthier. Anyway...Don't let anyone make you feel bad about how great you look now.
Called "Anorexic" and begging for help!
Motivation comes and goes, just keep it up!
But that's just me! Either be offended or take it as a huge compliment - you've done so much hard work that people are starting to think you're as thin as an annorexic (when clearly 170lbs is no annorexic weight). Whatever people say, keep on doing what you are doing and what makes you feel good - after all, they only have to look at you, they don't have to live in your skin or live your life for you! Remember that!
Thanks for the support, and I will support you!
