100 lb. Club - Speaking of struggling
11-17-2005, 07:22 PM
I am having a horrible time getting started! Today I have had cookies and a cinnabon...that's right folks a cinnabon! :( I feel like such a failure. I am actually ashamed to see my husband's family this year because I am so huge! I don't kno what to do and I just can't seem to make the changes I need to be successful. :(
11-17-2005, 07:50 PM
Don't beat yourself up over the cinnabon. Just try to make healthier food choices for the rest of the day. What exactly are you doing to lose weight? I see that you have lost 5 lbs already! :carrot: Weight loss can be a very SLOW process. Just take it one day at a time. Don't give up!
11-17-2005, 07:50 PM
Kristin. Don't be so hard on yourself. Just try to learn from your mistakes and move on. If your husband's family is going to judge you based on that, please do not let it get to you. Be proud of the fact that you are putting forth the necessary effort to lose the weight. I'm sure you'll get lots of better advice from the support system here, but I just had to add my two cents. Good luck sweetie :hug: .
11-17-2005, 09:49 PM
At least you didn't eat a dozen cinnabons :) Tomorrow is another day! You can get back on and eat healthier tomorrow, right?! Youve lost 5 pounds already, thats a start :) Dont worry what your husbands family has to say, you dont live with them and you dont need to listen to them :)
11-17-2005, 10:09 PM
Don't beat yourself up over the cinnabon -- it's SOOO yesterday! Try to just one or two small changes at a time -- drink less soda or eat more fruit or replace sugar with splenda in your coffee... even better -- get up right now and take a short walk -- even 5-10 minutes would be a good start!!
ANd yay for those 5 pounds!
11-17-2005, 11:37 PM
Since it can't be said often enough - don't beat yourself up. You are NOT a failure. You made a poor food choice. It isn't the first time, it won't be the last. You have to find a way to move on. Remember that losing weight is not an all or nothing contest. Think about how it came to be that you ate that cinnabon. I assume it wasn't planned or you wouldn't feel bad about it. Making mistakes is never fun but they can be valuable lessons if you don't waste time worrying over them. What could you have done to avoid it? Answer that question and you are less likely to find yourself in the same situation down the road. Consider, too, what might have been a better option if a similar situation is not avoidable. Maybe half a cinnabon next time?
I think it is important that we teach ourselves not to associate guilt and shame with food. How did you feel while you were eating that cinnabon? I bet that you were feeling pretty rotten about it (even if on the surface you enjoyed the taste of every single bite). I used to do that to myself ALL of the time. If I want something - and I mean REALLY want something it is okay to have it. But, I make darn sure that I enjoy every morsel without guilt. Otherwise, I'm not satisfied when I'm done, and that leads to me wanting more (another shot to enjoy it, I guess). Don't get me wrong, I don't give in to every craving I have. But, if I do decide to give in I accept responsiblity for it, enjoy it, and then I'm ready to get right back on plan. I find it much more difficult to make my next meal a healthier one if I'm still stewing about something I ate 3 hours ago.
11-18-2005, 01:19 AM
jawsmom -- I am so trying to have that healthy attitude when I do eat something I really want!
11-18-2005, 01:00 PM
I agree that you shouldn't beat yourself up over that.
It took me a while for this to sink in but it is so true. We have to have food to fuel our bodies. Some fuel is better than others obviously. If you figure even just eating 3 meals a day (not counting snacks) you would have over 60,000 meals from the time you are 20 until age 75. Your cookies and cinnabon are nothing when you think you still have 59,999 more meals to get it right.
What I've been doing, (especially when I know that I have something special coming up that involves food) is to tell myself I will eat a healthy breakfast and lunch and then enjoy the off plan dinner. It is one meal. Then the next meal get back to eating healthy.
11-18-2005, 01:35 PM
Sounds like you have gotten some good advise here. You can do this. Just move on to the next meal and make better choices.
I know how you feel about not wanting to see people at the holidays. However we tend to think worse of ourselves then others do. So just try and forget all those negative thoughts about yourself and enjoy the holidays. Your a person just the same as anyone else and you deserve to be good to yourself and enjoy this time of year as much as anyone else.
11-18-2005, 02:35 PM
If I want something - and I mean REALLY want something it is okay to have it. But, I make darn sure that I enjoy every morsel without guilt. Otherwise, I'm not satisfied when I'm done, and that leads to me wanting more (another shot to enjoy it, I guess). Don't get me wrong, I don't give in to every craving I have. But, if I do decide to give in I accept responsiblity for it, enjoy it, and then I'm ready to get right back on plan. I find it much more difficult to make my next meal a healthier one if I'm still stewing about something I ate 3 hours ago.
So true! This is why it is such an important thing to create a lifestyle that includes those things you really love (and I mean REALLY love). Often times, we beat ourselves up over something like this because it was kind of a waste of calories -- it wasn't something we REALLY enjoyed; just something we put in our mouths in hopes that we might enjoy it. I know this all too well. I have wasted countless calories in my life on Susi-Q's, Oreos, and Doritos. You know what? I would much rather have a piece of homemade chocolate cake than a Suzie Q. It is so much better. That realization has led to me finally getting what works for me in terms of cravings (my sister has now started to do this with success as well): if you really want a cinnamon roll, have one, but wait until you are home and make a homemade one (if you are out and about, go to the market and get the ingredients you need). Why? Because 1, you'll know you are getting quality, delicious, more healthful ingredients -- much better sources of fats and calories than a processed store-bought one. The other thing is, about 95% of the time, you will decide it is just not worth the bother. For that 5% when it IS worth the bother, you will most likely enjoy it 10-fold beause you made it and you know what's in it. Plus, provided you wrap up and give away/freeze the rest of them, it is probably not going to add any weight because it is only happening 5% time.
If it is a food you really couldn't realistically make yourself (a chocolate truffle/ice cream), tell yourself again that you can have it, but in an atmosphere that is as pleasant as the food (which would not be a mall or your car). Buy the truffle, go home, light a candle, make a cup of coffee, put on some nice music, and enjoy your truffle.
The point is...create a lifestyle where you are actually mindfully enjoying the food you eat. Obviously, this is not realistic for EVERY meal -- so, for the meals when you have to eat at your desk, for example (or, as in my case, with 3 noisy, messy children), eat a simple, healthy meal (good time for salads, leftovers, simple soups, etc.) and save your special foods for a time and place when they can get the spotlight and atmosphere they deserve (have you ever eaten a scoop of gelatto on a warm day in the color-peak time of Fall on the patio of an urban Italian cafe with a latte and a favorite book -- which you have to put down because the gelatto is so good? It is so much more delicious than in a mall or rushing to an appointment).