100 lb. Club - Continually starting over...




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natenkayliesmom
11-08-2005, 01:10 PM
I am back.... again. I cannot stay motivated to lose all of this weight!! I KNOW I need to lose it... for my health more than anything. (Though the vanity part keeps fighting it's way back to the top of reasons I need to lose.) But I just get so discouraged so easily. And I cannot stay motivated. (Is that the same thing?) I count calories & then get bored. So I fall off track. Then I go on Atkins or another low carb plan and hit a plateau and get discouraged and fall off track again. Then I do WW or low-fat diets or starvation... you get the picture. I think I have diet related-ADD!!!

I don't know!!! I know this is hard work & will take a long time & regardless of whether or not I lose weight, time is still going to pass. January 1, 2006 will still be here regardless of whether or not I get to goal. So I might as well do something while I'm waiting for that day & get healthier in the process. But why does it have to be soooo hard to stay on track?!?!? :?:

Part of me says "at least you keep starting over" and "failure isn't stopping & restarting... failure is just stopping". I guess I'm just too impatient & want easy results. Help!!!


Cherryh
11-08-2005, 01:16 PM
Hey woman!!!

You can do this. Just start walking more. If you have been walking once or twice a week, go to three or four times. Start slowly, and add one minute each time you go!

You can still eat really yummy things that are low calorie. Counting calories has worked for me for two years now. I'm just maintaing now. I know it's hard, but it's so worth it!!! You will be so proud of yourself!!!!

I'm glad you are not stopping!!!

AnnieFannie
11-08-2005, 01:29 PM
You said it yourself. "failure isn't stopping & restarting... failure is just stopping." You haven't given up totally. I'm glad that you are still trying.

I wish I had an answer to why it is so hard. I have been trying for awhile too. I'll start exercising and then get bored with it or I'll say it is ok to skip today. I'll do it tomorrow, but tomorrow comes and goes and here I am saying I am saying the same thing. It's hard to break the cycle. Just take small steps at a time. Make little changes in your diet. Cut something out and add more veggies or fruits.

Just keep working on it and don't give up. You can do it.


Sandi
11-08-2005, 01:59 PM
Stephanie..I could have written that post myself. That is me EXACTLY. You should be proud that you never give up. I don't know that I have any advice. I am in the same place. Even almost at the same weight. I guess I am here to say your not alone and you can do this! (((HUGS)))

funniegrrl
11-08-2005, 02:30 PM
What you're experiencing is very common, and something I experienced all my life until this last attempt. You depend on the "dieter's high" of starting over, starting a new program. That novelty and excitement keep you going for a while, but it fades. It's ALWAYS going to fade, but we always think THIS time will be different and it will carry you through. As you start one new diet (or restart the same diet) over and over, the "motivation" fades more and more quickly. I finally stuck to a program for a number of years when I gave up on motivation and I really understood in my gut that whatever I did to get the weight off was what I'd have to do FOR LIFE.

I finally understood that when that initial enthusiasm trickled away, I'd still have to do what I had to do. This is where I made a COMMITMENT. This is where I understood that I could no longer eat according to whim, that I had to eat correctly whether or not I "felt like it." So, the first time I started experiencing that slide of boredom and feelings of rebellion, I was ready. I talked to myself CONSTANTLY about doing the right thing, learning about myself, reshaping my way of thinking about food. There were times when I really was hanging on by sheer force of will, more so than I had ever done before. But, one day I woke up and I wasn't feeling so cranky, rebellious, down. I felt a little more enthusiasm. I started picking up steam again. I lived through it! I proved to myself that I could succeed even though I didn't feel "motivated," and once I'd done that, each cycle of discouragement was easier to live through, not as strong, shorter. You have to get through it once to see that it's possible, but first you have to be willing to do what it takes to get through it the first time.

I highly recommend going over to the Maintainer's board and reading those posts, especially the sticky called "Best of Maintainers." When you start to understand how others not only lost weight but keep it off, you start to understand what's REALLY necessary to win this fight. Our thought processes are so ingrained it's hard to see them sometimes. When you hear what others have discovered, you start to see your own patterns and that's when you can start changing them. You can't change anything if you keep doing what you've been doing and thinking the way you've been thinking.

cwneeds2lose
11-08-2005, 02:44 PM
Funniegirl, thanks for the inspiration. I'm in the same boat as they others, starting/stopping. I've lost weight so many times, but this time, the starting is really hard, and I'm having a tought time. I'll try to keep in mind everything you said, and I'll check out the Maintainers Board. Thanks for the encouragement.

ChocLabLover
11-08-2005, 03:38 PM
Stephanie,

Funniegirl has got it one. We all have experienced the first rush of starting a new plan, having a big loss in the first week, and as the weeks go by, losing that motivation and eventually not following the plan we have chosen. Or perhaps we slip on one meal, and it cascades into a day, and then what the heck, I might as well blow the whole week, my alter :devil: voice takes over. I know I am not alone when I say I have been there and have done that (I should have stocks in Weight Watchers I have joined so many times ;) )

My point being, all the plans work, but I needed to find one that suited my personality, the so called "click" (as Linda has mentioned in other posts). I tend to look at this as a long haul journey. It took me about a year or so to gain this weight, so it will take me that amount of time to take it off. I have taken this mindset because I do no want to set myself up for failure (again! :rolleyes: ) The other thing I have learned is not to set a schedule, which is a hard thing to do, but for me, it is discouraging if I do not meet the timeline I set out for myself.

You can do this! :cheer: You need to find your "click". There are so many plans out there that I know you can find one that suits you. It is a learning experience, with many pitfalls along the way. We all stumble once in awhile. Kudos to you for not stopping, and to keep on going.

Jen
11-08-2005, 04:15 PM
Hi there. This is how I have felt many, many times. I absolutely hate counting anything, whether it is calories, point, fat grams or whatever. I hate following what someone else thinks I should be eating. There is no magic pill that is going to help me lose weight, I have to buckle down and just do it! I have to use the intelligence and common sense that I've been given to eat healthy and exercise. It won't happen overnight but every little tiny baby step forward is a positive step that will lead to long term weight loss.

Take every day as a new day, think what can I do today to help me lose weight and become a healthier person.

check out this web site www.onephatman.com for some inspiration.

Sandi
11-08-2005, 04:29 PM
Jen -

I didn't know he was back on line. Very cool! Thanks!!!

natenkayliesmom
11-08-2005, 05:40 PM
Thanks y'all! I knew that if I posted what I was feeling that there would be inspiration at the other end. That's why everytime I start over, I come back here. I love y'all!!

dragonwoman64
11-09-2005, 12:20 PM
I totally agreed with funniegirl's post.

I have been on a few diets, WW and JC, and have lost and gained back lots of weight. It wasn't until I really understood deep in my brain that it had to be a lifestyle change that I started to lose more consistently and managed to keep it off. It's been a slow process for me.

I think that when motivation fails me, habit can be a good buddy. I've worked to get in the habit of an eating pattern and an exercise pattern so that even when that part of me that just doesn't want to do it kicks in, the habit of just doing it every day takes over and helps me out.

It can be such a mental battle sometimes. I keep a journal with lots of pictures of what activities I want to do when I reach a more ideal weight -- hiking and horseback riding, biking, etc.

Like we were saying in the thread Sandi started, sometimes it takes working on one part of the effort at a time, maybe it's giving up soda, or walking, or eating more fruits and vegetables. Maybe it's learning how to do something else besides reaching for the chocolate when you feel stressed or want to be pampered (that's me!).

I think it's not really true when we say "starting over," because each time I've gone back to losing weight, I've known more about eating and exercise and how to cope without overeating. I'm not really at "square one" no matter what the number on the scale says. It can be mental sabotage to think that way.

I hope that helps. I know it's not easy. Hang in there.