Support Groups - In Response to "Kicked off the Thread!"




mscat816
10-23-2005, 08:49 PM
There has been a lot of "chat" on 3fc about me "kicking" Casper off the Week at a Time Challenge thread. I have tried to keep this matter between the two of us. However, since it has become public, I will publicly share the following:

Knowing Casper personally, I invited her to check out 3fc threads (not just mine). When she elected to join Week At A Time, I asked her to keep our previous relationship anonymous so as the hostess, I could treat her posts the same as others. However, due to personal knowledge of some of the content in Casper's posts, I experienced difficulty responding to her without bias. I made several attempts to communicate this to her personally without success.

There was a significant drop in posting until one day it was only the two of us. I pm'd the recent members to inquire why they were no longer posting and did receive a few comments of concern about the content of Casper's posts. Instead of directly addressing Casper, I made a feeble attempt to redirect her by addressing the entire thread. This was cowardly of me and I apologize to everyone posting on Week at a Time.

Finally, I made a personal request for Casper to shift to journaling and try some other threads that would more appropriately meet her needs. I did not "kick" her off as there is nothing I could or would have done if she had said no to my request.

Other than responding to others whom Casper pm'd about being "kicked off the thread", I have not requested or encouraged anyone on the thread or through pm's to take sides. I know that Casper has found this difficult. It has been difficult for me as well for the following reasons: 1) Because this became public, it is evident by the recent posts and lack of posts participants of the thread are questioning what and how often to post on Week at a Time; and 2) Although everyone with the exception of Casper is anonymous to me, there are women on the thread I invited to participate on 3fc who know me pesonally and know that I am "mscat." Hence, the other reason I requested our relationship be kept anonymous.

Recent posts on the threads and journals indicate that I am a control freak, seeking attention, etc. and that a double standard exists about "personal" stories on Week at a Time. Let me clarify first, although I started the thread with a specific intent, I know I don't "own" and can't "kick" anyone off the thread for any reason including straying away from that intent. Secondly, there never was or is any intent to control or stifle the posts of anyone or posting of a personal nature. Without personal input, the thread would be cold and stagnant.

What I hope to encourage is focus on our weight loss goals and actions laced with personal sharing that enhances our caring for one another as people rather than words on the computer.

I welcome your comments regarding the site and my personal intentions for those who participate. I stand by my request to stop any further public discussion of what transpired between me and Casper regarding the site. I hope that we all can return to the business of motivating, uplifting and supporting each other on 3fc thread.

With love to all,
mscat

All that we have is right now.
Yesterday is gone, Tomorrow is not promised, and Someday is not a day of the week!


Suzanne 3FC
10-24-2005, 01:00 AM
I stand by my request to stop any further public discussion of what transpired between me and Casper regarding the site. I hope that we all can return to the business of motivating, uplifting and supporting each other on 3fc thread.


While I have not followed this saga entirely, I am aware that there have been a few problem that lept from the real world to our forum. I appreciate that you are requesting to keep it off of the forum and that everyone return to their usual support groups and get back to the real reason we are all here. I'm assuming Casper feels the same way.

I think that we should all try to keep in mind that we never really know fully what is going on in either side of any situation, and what is told to us usally a small part of it, and is always biased on the part of the person telling their side. It's my personal opinion that no one here should offer suggestions or take sides in this situation, and we should all let it drop. It's sad to see a community divided this way, and I hope it ends with this thread.

Thanks :)