Weight Loss Support - Help! Can't get motivated

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05-20-2005, 10:15 PM
This is my first post, after I've spent much of my day lurking here, I finally decided to join!

Some of you ladies are so inspiring, although I just can't motivate myself to start yet! Sure I'd love to lose 100 pounds ultimately! And I'd love to gain back the self confidance I had in college (Pre-marriage!)

My big but, is that I don't know that I'm ready to give up Pepsi, I don't knwo that I'm ready to stop eating whenever I'm hungry! I know that's horrible things to hold me back, but they are what makes me fail, time and time again! About 5 months ago I lost 15 pounds, but I gained back 25!! I need to stop that, I want to be healthy! I want to lose weight before I have children.

I just need to commit myself!

05-21-2005, 02:20 AM
Tell you what giving up Pepsi alone will help huge.
I havent had a pepsi in almost two years now.
But I had to ween myself off of it. Yup just like a drug. I started out by getting a product called Tradewinds its a tea beverage. I got the extra sweet then after some time I went to just the sweet and now I hardly ever drink that either I have just water. I drink water , OJ and lowfat 1% milk which Im weaning down on that to to skim milk.
But yes I definatly would drop the pop if you can. I dont even mess with diet pop because I know myself. I will want a regular pop and Ive done it these many years I can keep on doing it.
To me pop is a drug. When you truly decide to change your life by eating right and exersising regulary thats when you know you have no other choice. You have to make the time to do what you need to do. Just like you are on schedule for your job for picking up the kids if you have any or just like you know you have a doctors appointment you have to make it to. You have to exersise. Theres no will do it tommorow and I cant today you have to make yourself get out and do it. And changing your eating portions and habits its the same thing. Its a life changing method. One that will lead you to where you want to be.
You have it in you and you just have to want it bad enough.
Im sure you do Im sure the real you is waiting to be let out.
Im on my way there. There are many times you wonder what am I doing can I do this? Why am I doing this? When will I look in the mirror and like what I see. You will. It takes time but it can happen and it feels really really good when it does, when you start to see and feel your body changing and when you have to buy new clothes and when people make comments to you that hey are you losing weight. Thats when all the sweat and the giving up of things you know is not right for your body is totally worth it.
Just go for it. A small step here and there and then biger steps later. You cant make drastic changes but you can start somewhere and keep growing on that. Read your labels ..know what you should and should not eat make changes in what you normally would use like take out the red meat and add lean white meats ,turkey chicken especially. Watch the nutrition information.
Give your self one meal a week and have something you want but you know you cant eat all the time. Soon you will not want that cheat meal you will try to make that cheat meal more heathy than a cheat meal.
And listen to your body . I work out now 6 to seven days a week but theres times when im so tired I need to take that extra day off or my body needs a little more calories because I have worked out alot or I done a lot at work, make it the heathy calories but your body will definatly convey the message when it really needs to have the rest or just the few extra calories.
It will take time but you can do it.
I started out 313 pounds I tried over and over again and this diet and that diet. But what basically came down to for me was putting myself first and making sure I took care of myself and my body. im down now 73 pounds and I never thought I would get here. I still have a long way to go but this is the most I ever lost and I know im on track this time.
And if you have situations you know you cant be in.. Like at work for me people will have pizza for lunch..Pizza is a weakness for me.. I will simply tell them I can not be in the room when they are eating and I will join them another day. I let it be known that I know I cant handle it and I do not put myself in those situations where I know I will cave in and try just one piece.
So I hope you keep with it and I hope you get what you want and where you want to be. Glad to see you on the site and keep the head up and give yourself what you desearve. ;)

05-21-2005, 02:24 AM
I would second that. Don't try to change everything all at once. Start making small changes, maybe one a week. Try some exercise and don't even give up any food or drink for a while. Or just switch one thing in each meal for something a bit healthier. Switch one or two pepsis a day for water without giving up completely at this stage.

Just something to get the weight going down. Then once you realise how good it feels the motivation to do more should be easier to find.

05-21-2005, 02:53 AM
Yep, small steps at first is how I got started. I think the very first thing I did was start eating diet tv dinners for lunch at work instead of the big ol' Hungry Man ones I used to plough through. Then I set myself extremely easy exercise goals... five minutes on the elliptical, on a very low setting. Something I knew I could do with no hassle.

Even these very small changes brought results, and motivated me to take more and more steps. I still have motivation problems from time to time (well, like today) but I can't really see myself giving up on the baby steps that got me started in the first place... they are a habit now.

So start slow, you're not in a race against anyone.

05-21-2005, 03:25 AM
The other thing about starting slow. Remember that you're trying to make changes for the rest of your life rather than just until you get to goal then going back to your old bad habits.

Build in changes one at a time so they get ingrained in your life. Sure it might take longer to get to goal, but it also gives you longer to practice for a lifetime of maintenance.

05-21-2005, 10:06 AM
I don't knwo that I'm ready to stop eating whenever I'm hungry!

You don't need to be hungry to lose weight. The trick is to eat when you are hungry, and stop eating when you are not hungry. Also, choosing healthier options will fill you up on less calories, so you will still be satisfied, but will have consumed fewer calories. There are also a huge number of diet aids out there -- every time I've dieted, I've used slim-fast to help me get started. Slim-fast and similar products have special ingredients that make you feel full even though you haven't eaten much, and after using them for a few weeks I find that my appetite goes down (so less food will make me feel full). Once I have the appetite under control, then it is easier to switch to eating smaller portions. There are also a lot of appetite suppressants on the market which I haven't tried.

Like everyone said, I think baby steps are key. Try switching little things, like cutting down the amount of oil you use when cooking, or not putting quite so much butter on your bread. Try getting wheat bread instead of white -- it is better for you and will fill you up more. I usually eat wheat bread, but I still throw in a loaf of white bread here and there because I love the taste. Instead of getting pizza with pepperoni and sausage, get pizza with vegetables, and gradually reduce the amount of it you eat by maybe having a big salad before the pizza arrives so you will not be as hungry.

There are a lot of little ways to cut down on things. I'm afraid I don't have any advice about the Pepsi though -- do you drink so much of it because you are addicted to the caffiene, or is it just the taste? My bf was addicted to caffiene (he would drink about 10 cups of coffee a day, or more). He went through a pretty bad withdrawal when he quit cold turkey, but he hasn't had caffiene in three years now. People don't usually talk about caffiene as a drug, but from what I see of my friends' experiences, quitting caffiene is just as hard as quitting smoking.

Anyway, good luck! I'm sure you can do it. And remember, you don't have to be hungry to lose weight! I eat enough to be satisfied (but not stuffed!) at every meal, and I am still losing.

05-21-2005, 12:13 PM
Nobody wants to feel hungry all of the time. In my experience, a big part of weight loss success is learning to discriminate between the feelings of hunger, satisfaction, and full. I always thought feeling full was the same as being satisfied and that the feeling of satisfaction was hunger. It took some time and effort to learn to listen to my body but I realize now that just because I'm not stuffed to the point of being uncomfortabe doesn't mean I'm hungry. In my opinion it all gets much easier once you redefine hunger. At this point I HATE to feel full and I LOVE the feeling I have between meals when I'm perfectly satisfied - not hungry, not full. I feel light, energetic, and motivated.

Everyone else is right. You don't have to give up everything at once. In fact, you might find that you can ease yourself into a healthier lifestyle by not changing any of your eating habits at first. Instead, start adding exercise. You can't eat while you are working out, your mind is off of food, and it will help curb your appetite during the day. It won't take long at all before you feel the difference exercise makes and you can begin cutting back your calories. Once you have the hang of eating fewer calories you can begin concentrating on eating BETTER calories. Before you know it, you've changed all that you need to lose weight successfully.

Different things work for different people. You know yourself better than anyone. Listen to everyone's advice and pick and choose what you believe will work for you. Sometimes it comes down to trial and error. The key is to not give up between trials. And make sure that you goals are attainable. You want to challenge yourself but you don't want to set your sights on something that is humanly impossible. Be flexible. Change your goals and your plan as you need to - don't get bogged down with timelines and numbers. Also, try not to think only in terms of weight loss. If you eat better and exercise more you will feel better. Ultimately what you want to be is healthy. Luckily, losing weight comes with the territory.

Good luck to you!

05-21-2005, 12:30 PM
Hey Morticia! We have the same birthday! Which causes me to think - what is my birthday goal this year? I have been 45 pounds over weight (according to the Weight Watcher chart - actually more than that to satisfy me) for about 12 years. I have been on and off Weight Watchers (being Lifetime does have its DISadvantages) during that time. Pepsi is not my problem, but uncontrolled eating from 4 PM on IS my problem.
OK - back to the birthday. Hmmmm! It is 6 weeks away - hmmmm! Let's see, 185 minus 12 is 173. Hmmmm! Let's say to break 175 - how's that?

Regards to all,
Ivanna B. Svelte

05-21-2005, 05:34 PM
Thank you everyone for all of your advice and thoughts!

I started today with giving up soda cold turkey. I've been up since 6 am (it's 2:30 now) and I'm doing ok!! But I've probably drank 3 gallons of water!!! (I've always drank water though, so that's no big deal!)

I'm also going to use the gym membership my husband and I have!! (I'm going to go swim laps, I love swimming!)

05-21-2005, 06:21 PM
If you are going cold turkey on the Pepsi and not having any other caffeine, you will go through a pretty significant withdrawal -- you will feel lousy, have headaches, etc. It may not hit you until tomorrow. Just know that it WILL pass and you'll come out the other side feeling fine.

05-21-2005, 09:44 PM
Hey Morticia! We have the same birthday! Ivanna B. Svelte

Sweet Having a July 3rd Birthday feels like everyone is celebrating you the very next day dont it. I like it. Fireworks everywhere. :woo:

Pepsi for me was a drug and I did have the headaches and the feeling of being rundown. But since you are use to drinking water hopfully it wont be as bad for you as some of us had it when we quit the soda scene. :goodluck:

05-22-2005, 11:27 PM
Recently I found I was having lots of trouble eating 'mindfully" b/c of other things that were happening and I wanted an easy practical motivation tool. So I made a teeny little excel spreadsheet - nothing impressive like Fitday or anything - where I write down the habits I want to reinofrce this week. Then every day I jot down yes or no if I did them (or not). My habits are really small - drinking my water, exercise, write down everything I eat (not counting it, just noting it at this stage), some 'self-care' (eg doing my nails or reading for pleasure), knitting, and going to bed by 10.00. These last 3 are to help me recognise my weight loss efforts are in the context of having a better life oevrall, which means making time to do things I enjoy, if possible. So then at the end of the week I count up all the yesses - that's it. I found that this simple method helps me focus on what I want to be doing rather than feeling like a 'failure' becuase I'm not doing things. Anyway good luck giving up the pepsi - that will make a massive difference

05-23-2005, 12:31 AM
My husband just did this as well. He was drinking 5-6 Mountain Dews a day. It was giving him cavities and making him grind his teeth in his sleep. He first switched over to pepsi (less caffeine), then to tea (only a little caffeine) and finally to 7-Up (no caffeine) and only a tea once in a while. Cutting back from 5-6 caffinated a day to 1-2 not caffinated made him have headaches for a while, but he got over it, and he is happier for doing it. Good luck on the Cold Turkey method.

Couple other things. Paperclippy mentioned it, but I wanted to reiterate: You should NOT ignore the hungry impulse. Hunger is the body's natural way of telling you to eat something. The important things are "What" and "How much" you choose to eat. Those are the choices that will help you lose weight. And remember, its not about perfection, its about improvement. And I find that, for me anyway, if I have a craving, it is better to satisfy it wisely than to let it build. For example, if I want an Oreo, I have ONE, rather than letting it bug me and then having 6 and feeling guilty. I feel no guilt over one Oreo.

If you are an emotional eater, try to acknowledge that and learn to recognize how that feeling differs from hunger. I eat when I'm bored. Now I know if I head to the pantry, I have to stop and listen to my body. If its not calling for food, I go and have a glass of water instead.

Also, getting into things gradually is definitely the best advice you will find. Start with little changes and you will find they lead you to WANT to make other changes. For example, once you get used to exercising a few minutes every day, you will probably find your appetite is decreasing. Listen to that hunger (or lack thereof). Don't eat just because you think it is time.