Weight Loss Surgery - STILL getting some of THOSE looks

View Full Version : STILL getting some of THOSE looks

05-08-2005, 09:25 PM
maybe it'll motivate me to get cracking on the plastic surgery...

here's the deal... i did my very first organized 5K walk on saturday, with the dog. we finished dead last, after taking an hour. i didn't care one bit. ya need cartilage in your knees to move fast, and that just isn't happening...

but the runners - the ones who were seriously competing in the 10K gave me THAT LOOK - that up-and-down appraisal that ended with raised eyebrows.

yeah, i'm no fashion plate. the tummy will never be flat. they have no clue what i've done -and it's none of their business. yet, they are judging me, and i don't like it. not one bit.

need some major attitude adjustment here... but i'm not quite sure what to adjust TO... any thought?? <come on, i KNOW you have them!!!!>

05-08-2005, 11:02 PM
They're thinking: "That is ONE BEAUTIFUL BABE competing with her dog". Keep it up, sweetie. And CONGRATULATIONS on completing your first 5k!!!!!!!!!

05-09-2005, 02:45 AM
My thoughts exactly! You should stand proud and feel proud for all that you've accomplished. Walking/Running a 5k marathon is no easy task! If you're still getting looks....well, give them looks back--one with a great big smile. :D

(hope you don't mind me popping in here....just wanted to say I'm proud of you! I have yet to run/walk a marathon....heck...not even a darn mile around the neighborhood!!)

Digital Girl
05-09-2005, 04:01 AM
I am a little confused, why would they look at you strange?


05-09-2005, 10:33 AM
ladies - i KNEW you'd have some wisdom.. and marti - trust me, this was no marathon!!!! just 3 miles [and a wee bit more]. there is no marathon in my future... thank goodness!!!!

and digital.. hmmm. well. it's like this. i have an enormous 'spare tire' that consists of about 15 pounds of excess skin. it's what's left of the nearly 300 pounds i've lost.

all in all, i have about 30 pounds of fat to lose, but this excess skin adds at least 2 pants sizes to all my clothes. so unless they know the whole story, people assume that i'm actually much much heavier than i am.

and since many people view seriously overweight people as less than human...

not everyone is kind...

Digital Girl
05-09-2005, 11:00 AM
Oh, I am sorry I just read that you had Gastric bypass Surg. Is having the sugery a downfall to having excess skin? Compared to losing it slowly? I know I am going off topic, sorry really. I have a friend who lost over 150lbs doing a typical diet, and she does not have any skin at all, but another friend who lost her weight more quicker and does have some excess skin?

Is this true...

Anyway, you sound like a champ, and you sound just awesome!!! :)

Hey Jude
05-09-2005, 01:28 PM

I hope you don't mind me sticking my nose in here, but I read your messages on here, and on the SDP, and I have always really appreciated your insight.

You get the PS when you are darn good and ready, and not a minute before. Don't let some dumbass runners bother you with their looks. They have absolutely no clue about you, your life, your struggles, all that you have been through.

Rock on girl! :dancer:

05-09-2005, 02:19 PM
Jiff, congratulations on the 5K!!! and that is 3.2 miles, never forget it!!

As for the looks, I know the look to which you refer, not sure what to tell you about that, other than...........you should be darn proud of where you are today and don't forget it. A wise little birdie once told me (Haziefrog) "do they pay your mtg, do they put food on your table, if the answer is no, than "F" them" Sorry for the "F" but it just isn't the same without it. :lol:

05-09-2005, 02:31 PM
Hi Jiff, Congrats on your 5K, that's so awesome!!! I've found that in general you're going to get the looks no matter what you do. Fat or thin they're going to look. Be proud of yourself and in all the accomplishments that you've had and just let them look. With all of the encouragement and wonderful advice that you've given to everyone here you can tell what a beautiful person you are. You'll get your surgery when you're ready but in the mean time, let them look and be stong in the knowledge that they're looking at a much healthier, more self confident and very beautiful inside and I'm sure out women.

05-17-2005, 12:59 PM
Hey Jiff!

I Just read your post, and realized that oh my gosh your story is so gosh darn familiar. I have lost almost 200 lbs. with only 40 more pounds to go to reach my surgery weight of 200 lbs. I am so extremely nervous. But, I have no choice. I have so much excess skin, it looks like I am melting. I get the same looks all the time. I think darn, 200 pounds lost and people are still viewing me as less than human. Some people are just plain mean!!!

Digital Girl
05-17-2005, 01:45 PM
Is the extra skin from losing so fast? Would this be the downfall of having WLS?

05-17-2005, 03:54 PM
I'm pretty sure that the extra skin is just from being heavy to begin with. My surgeon said that your skin only has so much elasticity and from being as heavy as most of us were/are it just won't go back. But I'm pretty sure in my case the skin on my legs would be this bad no matter what diet I lost 155 pounds on. So no, I don't think its a downfall of WLS.

Digital Girl
05-17-2005, 04:13 PM
Oh, the only reason why I mentioned it, is because I saw a friend who lost the weight without WLS and exercised as she lost and she is very tone to that of another friend who lost the same or near the same weight with WLS and has the extra skin?

I guess it is a case by case basis?

Thanks for the reply....
:) :) :)

05-17-2005, 04:27 PM
it IS a case by case basis... and lots of things go into it. drinking enough water, taking your calcium, getting enough protein are all pieces. but the biggest ones are your age, and your genes.

exercise can get you to a certain point, but that's about it...

Digital Girl
05-17-2005, 04:31 PM
I guess it is not so cookie cutter? Thank you for letting me know! You look awesome by the way!

05-17-2005, 08:47 PM
I would definately have to agree, it is different for everyone. I personally did not lose my 140+ lbs. quickly, it has actually taken me about 2 years. I have been working out for two hours a day 6-7 days a week for two years. My biggest problems are my legs, and lower stomach. It's crazy, my upper abs are starting to look nice, but with the excess skin on my lower stomach, I cannot do anything with my lower abs to enhance the way they look. Sooooo... that is why I am having surgery. Call me vain, but I feel like I am too young and attractive to have all this skin just hanging around. Woo Hoo, I cannot wait to go sarong-less at the beach!!!!

Digital Girl
05-18-2005, 03:21 AM
Awesome, it is not vain, you have to do what makes you feel better!!!

;) ;) ;)

05-22-2005, 09:52 PM
Congrats on your first 5k. I've gotten addicted. I just started running about 2 years ago after losing 60 lbs. I had been a couch potato for 30 years. I actually coach beginning runners now which is still unbelievable to me. Anyway, a couple of thoughts. I'm surprised runners would give you negative looks. All the people I run with really respect people for getting out there and moving. There is one caveat, though. Sometimes walkers get in the way of runners. It usually isn't a problem at 5k's. 1/2 marathons and marathons have developed a real issue with walkers vs. runners.

05-22-2005, 10:49 PM
Congratulations on the 5K! :bravo: You've established your PR (Personal Record); now your next task is to beat it! You may not remember me, but I started running 5K races just a year ago. I'll tell you what the "Look" means. They are thinking, "Good for you, Girl! You are out here DOING IT!" I am quite famous for being in charge of bringing up the rear guard, and one thing I say is that I beat all of those people who were afraid to show up! I received a beautiful trophy yesterday for being third in my age group for the year in the local runners' club.

I know there are a lot of buff runners out there, but there are also a lot of us particularly in the 5K races that are there to be healthy and do the best we can. It is true that walkers are a problem for runners - I can't tell you how many times I've had trouble getting past four or five walkers walking abreast next to each other who lined up at the starting line rather than paying attention and starting towards the back of the pack with the walkers and slower runners like me. But they are most likely beginners, so I pick myself up when I fall trying to get around them and just keep on going! The whole point is to keep going.

And I am thrilled by every walker who shows up for a 5K - maybe they will get the bug! You'll know when you have the 5K bug when you plan your weekend around the next race!

07-20-2005, 05:37 PM
:mad: :mad: :mad:

I thought of this thread today when I was working out. After helping an elderly woman figure out the treadmill, she started going on and on how nice it is that someone who's as overweight as I am is in the gym, "at least trying". You know, I got my *** to the gym, worked out hard and was feeling pretty proud only to have her say that. I think she thought she was being pleasant, but I gotta tell you, I'm in a really bad mood now. :(

And, I didn't say anything back. I'm a big weinie I guess, but I don't think she thought she was being rude.

Hopefully I won't run into her tomorrow!

Thanks for letting me vent at a place where people understand how frustrating a remark like that is.


07-20-2005, 07:40 PM
Jiff, you should have told me, I could have tripped a few of them for yah. And like Deb said *f* em if they were thinking anything but kind thoughts.

Let me just say this...... I have met Jiff, she actually lives in the next town from me :D and I gotta say her picture do not do her justice. She is one beautiful lady, even more so in person. My guess is, they were looking at your beautiful smile JiffyPopPopPop and not your little belly. So keep on smiling (it makes people wonder what your up to lol) and focus on how wonderful you are doing (because you really are, and we are so proud).

07-20-2005, 10:16 PM
had to re-read every single post in this thread today - and wiping away the tears for all your kind comments. <by the way, leenie leenie bo beenie - do you know where your glasses are??? are you SURE you can see clearly??????>

the more i stay on this path, the more i GET - deep down inside - that what perfect strangers think is absolutely irrelevant. i don't need a blessed thing from them!!!!

and as an aside, the organizers of this race have figured out how to deal with the walker vs runner issue: the 10 K starts first. 15 minutes later, the 5K runners, and 10 minutes after that, the 5 K walkers. worked great!!!!

07-20-2005, 10:19 PM
chickadeedeedear - i know i'm going to get into trouble for doing this one of these days. let me tell you what i've done to some of THOSE people at the gym - the ones who give me all those 'encouraging' words. i come right out and tell them what i've done. it shuts them up pretty darn quick. now, i only do this if i've seen them a few times - and we've started talking. the reason: now that we've started talking, there's no way i can allow this line to continue.

so far, so good. it's worked. working. haven't been bopped yet.

the funny thing about helping that elderly lady, at some point, someone in that gym has probably thought 'good on her' for being HER age and working out. is there any difference? not sure...

07-21-2005, 01:56 PM
Jiffy congratulations! :bravo:
On "those looks"....some people will find a reason to give them no matter what just so that they can feel superior about something. You are the champ! You know where you've been, what you've overcome to be where you are now, and those looks should be pure admiration.


07-25-2005, 05:53 AM
I don't ever post here, but I lurk. I haven't had surgery and no plans to at this stage, but I love reading all your posts!!! (I have given myself 12 months to lose 25% of my excess weight, if I wasn't able to do it naturally I would consider surgery but thankfully am doing fine - but for the grace of god)

I am with the *f* brigade. You are one inspirational woman, you have done a fabulous job. I want to make you a t-shirt with a slogan on the front saying "if you think I am big now" and turn around on the back and there are your before and after pictures with slogan "you should have seen me before!"

Then with a big *f* you underneath. If you never have the bottle to wear it you can at least think it!!!!

Never forget, those people if they knew you and what you have done to get where you are, would think you're as fabulous as we all do.

07-26-2005, 04:00 PM
You Go GIRL!!!! How awesome that you did that 5K! I'm not here very often, but just wanted to tell you how proud I am of you for meeting this goal. I agree, don't pay any attention to what those people think. They may be able to run that race, but they don't have any idea the significance of the race you are winning. You have so many reasons to hold your head up high and proud. Your accomplishment on that day far surpasses anything they have accomplished. You should be so very proud of youself.