Support Groups - Steel Magnolias #9

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03-31-2005, 06:38 PM

Went down the mountain to WW this morning and am dedicated to not squander the rest of the year. Got 3 quarters left so here I go being back OP.

This town is small ~ just about 1700 folks and I can count about 4 Mexicans who work here. One is a waitress and the other three work at a market. One at the market may be Guatamalin and she works in the bakery part and the other two are stockers. All good workers and nice folks. Don't think there are any in the shcool system here. However 35 miles down the mountain there are lots of them and with gang problems. I do believe one day they will take over this country and it will look just like the home they left behind. During my lifetime I have met many good ones and don't think they are all bad at all. I just am of the mind frame that they sould be coming here legally. I don't have a prejudiced bone in my body ~ just come to this country legally ~ wait in line and we will welcome you. Help us make this a better place to live and don't tear it down. Our son is married to a wonderful Mexican (gorgeous too) gal and are their two children beautiful. She is in the armed service and serving the country as a first lieutenant. I think she is 3rd generation here in the USA. :soap:

03-31-2005, 10:53 PM
Good Evening, Flowers!
The sun was shining brightly today but it is so windy that it wasn't very nice to be outside to enjoy the weather. It's supposed to be nice again tomorrow.

This has been the longest week at school! :( Even the kids are complaining that it has seemed so long. I think that spring fever has arrived and everyone is ready for the school year to wind down.

"Gma" -- Yes, some of the Mexicans have multiple families living in many of the houses here also. (They prefer to be called Mexicans according to the kids!) We have several businesses started by Mexicans: restaurants, a dance hall/bar where there is always some sort of brawl over the weekend, and a couple clothing stores to name a few. Needless to say that some of our "white" merchants have closed their doors, in part thanks to Wal Mart coming to town as well as the general economy in our community. Our crime rate has climbed sky high as well as the school districts need for more ELL teachers, aides, and space. They will hire anyone who can speak Spanish (at a $1.50 more an hour than someone not bilingual) but the turnover is so great when they figure out they can work at the packing plant and make double what the school pays. One of the high school aides has been there for 7 years and is taking classes at the local college to get her degree so she can teach. She has 2 small children, a husband, and is very ambitious. We have some really nice kids that want to better themselves and plan to go on to college. However, the majority of the girls aim to get get pregnant asap. That is part of their culture to prove their feminity. The guys prove their masculinity by drinking and fighting. There are a few gang wannabes but so far they seem to be fighting amongst themselves. Drugs are everywhere and that is scary. There have been a few drive by shootings in the trailer court which is all Mexicans and that is one area I wouldn't drive through after dark. On payday they line up at the post office to send money back to relatives still living in Mexico. The interesting thing is that most of our "locals" came here from Texas, Chicago, or California and the majority of the kids were born in the U. S. Many of the parents still do not speak English however while many of the kids can only speak Spanish, they can't read it nor write it. It is an interesting lot that's for sure; not always good either. I hope you sleep better tonight!

Maggie -- Congrats on being OP! I have got to get back on track -- I'm afraid my spring clothes are going to be too tight. :cry: No one to blame but me, myself, and I! :mad: I never used to be prejudiced and had a hard time with a husband who was very much so after being in Vietnam but I have to admit that I am becoming more biased all the time. I'd like to think that I am fair but it irritates the !@#$%^& out of me when they speak Spanish standing in line in stores, then perfect English when it is their turn to check out. They all know how to work the 'free' handouts that are available. We've dealt with some kids who pretend to speak no English so that they will be put into the ELL classes and then find out later they speak, read, write, and understand English better than some of the white kids. It's definitely the case where one bad apple can spoil the whole barrel! I agree that they will someday take over the U. S. -- I just hope it is not in my lifetime which is sad and scary.

Hope you all have had a good day! Have a fantastic Friday tomorrow! :cb:

Jean -- :wave: from Iowa!

04-01-2005, 08:45 AM

Maggie: My new dil is half Mexican and we adore her. You are right about the illegals problem and it keeps gettting worse and worse. It seems to me the Mexicans that are citizens or at least green carders would be just as irate that an illegal is taking food from their kids mouths too!

Jean: I used to think I was pretty unbiased, but like you I have a spouse who is very bigoted against one race and thre is a reason. He grew up in New Mexico and so lived in a large biracial area, but while he was in the Navy, he was walking to his barracks after work one evening and about 3 feet from the back door was jumped by 4 men all of the same race, who beat him to a pulp, broke all the bones in his sinus area, broke his nose etc and for what? He had $4 in his pocket. He is not outwardly bigoted, but he does express it around me a lot. Now as for me, living here, I have become more of a cynic. There is such a majority here that are rude, nasty and feel you owe them something that it is hard not to become prejudiced against them. I get pretty fed up with the superiority routine and have to really watch myself to not get irritated about it all the time. I still have the integrity to go on a person by person basis.

I had a hard night last night, but I guess I am getting better. I took some meds and cough syrup and did sleep, though I had a real bout of coughing sometime in the night. Thing is, I am not congested in my chest, just coughing from a tickle in my throat so I think it is allergies.

I need to get over this so I can get back to my food plan and exercise and such as I was doing so great before we left for Indiana. You know how it is when you are sick, you don't want to do anything and grab the easiest thing there is to eat.

I guess I better get going


04-01-2005, 02:37 PM

We are going to be in the high 70's this day and a few to come. Spring is definitely here. I've got pieces of April, keep them in a memory boquet. Anyone remember that song ~ shows my age for sure. I love April. Gonna go to town today and pick up my new sneakers. I'm gettin a brown pair. I am limited to what kind of shoes I can get to fit over this brace. I do still wear my sandals on occasion ~ not every day all day like I used to. As circumstances have it we won't be spending as much time on our trip next week down south as we had first planned . We will leave in the morning of the 6th and come back on the 8th. Just a quickie. We are taking the last two weeks of August and the first two weeks of September off to do some traveling.

JEAN I wonder how long it will take and how much of this country gets over run before "they" do something about our borders. All ready hundreds of clinics and emergency medical places have had to close their doors because of being over run. They closed because they couldn't handle it which puts the burden elsewhere. The illegals get benefits that those born here can't get and that is upsetting lots of folks.

FAYEI sure do hope you get to feeling better. Those alergies can sure whip a person and are miseable. Do what you can my friend and get yourself back OP. It is hard to concentrate when ole Al E. Gee comes around. :dizzy:

Enjoy this first day of April and make a good memory.

04-01-2005, 07:08 PM
Good Afternoon, Flowers!
The sun is shining but it's cool outside with the wind still blowing away. I'm so glad it is Friday and I'm so ready for a break from school! The kids were just simply awful today -- the "good" ones were gone on a field trip and the rest evidently decided to go on strike because no one seemed to have any homework done nor any interest in doing anything worthwhile today. I felt like I was on assignment patrol duty all day.

"Gma" -- I hope you are feeling better as the day goes on. My sore throat is finally gone but it is scratchy in the morning. Tuesday is bloodmobile day so I'm hoping I will be 100% by then. They always ask if I have been on antibiotics, take my temperature, pulse, and blood pressure so guess I'll find out then. I haven't had a temperature -- at least I don't think I have. :rolleyes:

Maggie -- You mentioned pieces of April -- is there such a flower? Our flowers are beginning to appear and I'm hoping that it stays warm enough at night so they will keep on growing. We are opening a "free" clinic here and I'm sure it will be busy! The authorities just arrested 12 illegals in Spirit Lake and by golly they shipped 'em all back to Mexico. The joke is that the illegals probably beat their "ride" south back up here! :eek:

I need to dream up something for supper. I have meat to grill so that is a start! Have a relaxing evening and a nice weekend!

Jean -- :wave: from Iowa!

04-01-2005, 07:10 PM

Well my new shoes don't fit. I'll have her order a different size. It is funny how sizes differ in different brands. These were an inch and a half longer and narrower than what I wear and called the same size. That is so inconvenient for me because I can't try them on in the store but have to bring them home. Oh well I just have to deal.

We stopped at Fred's hot dog stand which he parks across from some government buildings here in town and he refused to let us pay for our dogs. He likes us so much and appreciates what Cowboy does for the town he is generous. When the kids have their last baseball games and at the end of the season he gives them all the dogs they want to eat for free. What a neat person. Also during the school year kids that buy a dog from him for lunch he gives them their second one free. He makes so much money on the big conventions and doings that he has it to give back to the community. While we were there today the Sheriff came by and reached in and took Ragg Mopp. Someone yelled from acorss the street "you can't give them a ticket." Jim replied "Kissing Ragg Mopp is better than kissing babies during election year!" What a guy! I don't think he will have any trouble winning his job for another term for he is one of the "good guys." LIFE IS GOOD.

JEAN I had finished my post and closed the forum down and then got notified that you posted so I am doing an "edit." We must have been typing at the same time because you weren't there when I started my post. Anyway "I've got piece of April" is an old song which I used to really love. I was elected "Girl of the Month" when I was in high school and it was in the month of April. That is one piece of April that I keep in a memory boquet other things are happenings in April that I cherish. Glad it is Friday and end of a work week for you. Why not retire and do some traveling. I remember you husband said you could retire when ever you wanted. Sounds to me that your school system isn't going to get any better in the years to come anyway. Just a thought.

04-03-2005, 01:50 AM
Good Evening, Flowers!
I'm just peeking in before I head off to bed. We left fairly early this morning because I wanted to do some shopping before our babysitting date with Ian.

Ian needed a nap and agreed to lay on the couch with Grandpa which lasted all of 5 seconds. I talked him into his bed and agreed to lay down with him. He was asleep in less than a minute and I was able to leave without him ever knowing I was gone. He's been busy learning sign language at his daycare sitter, knows most of the alphabet except he tends to leave out h,i,j,k for some reason, counts to 10, knows his colors, and all of the shape names from the Tupperware shape ball. I didn't realize he was so smart! :D Beth and Maddy came to play later in the afternoon. Maddy is 9 months younger so her claim to fame is a big smile and trying to talk although most of it still sounds like Chinese. :lol:

Maggie -- That's too bad about your new shoes -- frustrating, I'm sure. Yes, I could retire according to DH except that the school district pays 100% of my health insurance and a $15,000 life policy. I'm not old enough to collect IPERs on a monthly basis nor social security. It sounds like that program is in trouble. In todays paper, they finally admitted that the whites are the minority in the local district. A scary thought for sure! As long as I feel safe I will hang in there and I do enjoy my job for the most part. It only takes one student to ruin the whole day unfortunately.

Not much else is newsy from my corner of the world so I am off to bed. Have a relaxing Sunday!

Jean -- :wave: from Iowa!

04-04-2005, 10:44 AM
morning girls!

Maggie: Hope those new shoes will fit you better than the new shoes did... :D Sounds like your "hot dog man" knows where it is at!

Jean: Geez, it is nice to have your health insurance paid, but they are kind of puny on the life insurance policy aren't they? Because I don't have income, I just have a $10,000 with AARP so he can bury me! Don't want him getting ideas about getting rich off me... :s:

I am getting better except like an idiot, I took my bagless vacuum canister out and emptied it on a windy day and got it blown back in my face so got sick all over again. I am coming around. I think I will be back 100% tomorrow so I can get back to what I need to do to get skinny.

I cleaned the downstairs on Saturday and Sunday we went to Home Depot to check out tile for the downstairs, Jack got sick in the store and I had to rush him home. Problem is, with his heart meds, he has very few meds he can take OTC. I checked all of them and found he could take immodium so loaded him up and he was better by evening. I guess we will go back sometime today to pick out the kitchen style. We are in no hurry as we are not getting it installed until next year, but we have nothing to do today (City employees get off today because of MLK assassination was today) so he is hanging out at home. He is making breakfast so I guess I better hop to it.


04-04-2005, 07:43 PM
Good Afternoon, Flowers!
It's been a terribly windy day here in my corner of the state too. The sun is out and it's 78 degrees so as long as I don't have to be outside, I won't complain about the wind except I would really like to have my windows open.

"Gma" -- We are insurance poor simply because DH sells it. When the kids started driving he put the fear of the devil in them that if they ever had an accident, we'd get sued till the cows came home. They both had fender benders and fortunately no one was hurt; both drivers were at fault in both cases so there were no charges. My dad took out life insurance policies on me when I was a kid and they will pay me back when I turn 65. We have life policies on the kids, daughter in-law, and grandkids now too. I'm hoping we can pay the premiums until they are able to financially take them over. I'll be real surprised if you can pay for a funeral with $10,000 . . . my dad's was nothing fancy and it was a little over that. Hope you are feeling 100% soon -- don't work so hard! ;)

Maggie -- I hope you can get in today! I know you are getting ready for your trip. Have fun if I don't get back to you in time. :D

I need to get some pork loins ready to grill. DH is at practice and I'd like to eat as soon as he gets home. I hate being in the kitchen cleaning up at 7:00!

Have a nice evening and a terrific Tuesday tomorrow!

Jean -- :dancer: in Iowa!

04-05-2005, 11:14 AM
morning girls!

Jean: Ahhh, that tells a lot regarding the insurance! :lol:

It is nice and warm and sunny for the moment here today. It is supposed to cloud up and rain though this afternoon. I noticed my tree out back is finally budding so maybe spring has sprung. It seemed a lot more springy in Indiana and they have had serious cold weather and lots of snow. In fact it snowed the day we got up there. My friend's crocuses were all beautiful and in bloom and I know my grandma always gaged spring up there according to when her crocuses bloomed.

I have some housecleaning I want to get done. I felt bad yesterday with a lot of coughing and such and just didn't feel like dealing with the upstairs so need to get it done today I guess. Jack went back to work today so it is pretty boring around here.

We went looking at tile again yesterday afternoon and Jack nixed the idea of the original one we picked out (or rather HE picked out) We couldn't find anything we liked and was within our budget so we went to Lowe's and found the perfect tile and have decided on it. It will blend with all the wall colors downstairs so we can put just one tile color in the whole downstairs. I also decided to repaper the hall bathroom and found a pretty paper for it, though I think I am going to go online to the wallpaper place and see if I can find something I like better. I painted the woodwork a lavender and need to blend a paper with that as I am NOT repainting it and the cabinets except to touch up. It is that time of year again when I drag out the paint and do touchups on everything. I want to get everything except the floors done before my sister comes down to visit after school gets out for the year and they usually end in June sometime. Looks like I don't have a lot I have to do this year. I am still deciding whether or not I want to paint the kitchen cabinets another coat of white or just touch them up in places. That was an exhausting job doing it alone last year, with all the doors, taking off handles and such. I usually put a new coat on the countertops in the kitchen and bathroom to brighten them up and I have a couple little spots on the bathroom wall to touchup where I splashed red hair dye on the wall a little.

I guess talking is not getting the cleaning done. Have a good day everybody


04-05-2005, 06:50 PM
Good Afternoon, Flowers!
It was a "glad it's over" kind of day at school today. I don't know if the weather is going to change or the kids have just shut down, but my afternoon has 3 different classrooms with a different jerk in each one. Each jerk thought he was going to be in charge for the class period and I had other ideas. I was really close to making a kid stand in the corner because he wanted to sleep the study hall period away. He was supposed to be finishing a math test and claimed he didn't know how to do it and refused. His contact teacher came and got it for the next period and threatened him with going back on the behavior point sheet if he didn't do it. Gee, he seemed to know how to do all the unsolved problems for her! The last period of the day I spent with the gang "wannabe" who was booted out of math class because he wouldn't bring his book to class. He claims someone stole it and we wonder who in the world would want a math book. He's supposed to be doing copied worksheets but needs a calculator, needs a drink because he just came from p.e., needs to go to the bathroom, and the list goes on. I finally told him to sit down and be quiet or I would personally escort him to the office. I think he was finally quiet the last 30 seconds. No wonder I didn't get anything done this afternoon; I feel like I was on patrol the whole time! Thanks for listening . . . now I feel better.

I was supposed to donate blood today but since I've been fighting a sore throat, off and on, I called and asked. The answer was "no" even though I'm not running a fever nor on any meds. Yesterday it was pretty scratchy and sore but today it feels fine. *weird*

"Gma" -- Our tulips are coming up; it was 78 degrees yesterday and 71 today! Today feels more humid and we are supposed to be getting some rain which I thought would be happening by now. I wish I could get my whole house organized and clean at one time. Maybe in my next life! :D Do you just have one sister (with the disabled DH)? If she is the only one, will he come with her to visit?

Guess I will go check through the mail. We got our tax report back so need to see if I have enough to send to Uncle Sam on the 15th.

Have a nice evening and a wonderful Wednesday!

Jean -- :wave: from Iowa!

04-06-2005, 10:51 AM
Morning gals!

Jean: I have two sisters and a brother. My younger sister lives in Calif and my brother lives in a Chicago suburb. My older sister is the one that lives in Indiana and her dh is the one with MS. She has has a pretty hard adult life. Her love interest in college up and married her roommate and best friend pretty much out of the blue. She was so traumatized by it she came home from college and didn't go back. She started slinging hash at this diner and met this Hungarian man 20 years her senior and up and marries him just a few months later (bigtime rebound booboo) He was physically, mentally and verbally abuse to her and their three children and ended up committing suicide with my nephew's hunting rifle in my nephew's bedroom when the kids were 13, 14 and 16. The oldest has had a severe drinking problem ever since then as it was his gun and his room and never got any therapy for any of it. She had little skills and struggled to get her kids through school. The two oldest dropped out of school but went to work as brick layer laborers, learned the trade and have a business together. I have to brag and say they are probably the best I have ever seen at their job. After they were all three grown, she met her current husband who she knew had MS but at the time was totally mobile, even played golf etc and was an accountant at a hospital in patient accounts for like 20 years until he could no longer work. She has made poor choices when it comes to husbands but with regards to the second one, I think she was just plain lonely. He has been a royal pain since I have known him with a big chip on his shoulder and has always let his disease rule him instead of the other way around. He plays for sympathy and has always made her be his maid even when he could still get around on his own. Sometimes I feel her kids kind of ignore her, but in their defense until about a year ago, she was impossible to deal with and I had very little to do with her myself. I guess I came to realize that her attitude stemmed from her life and though she chose it, she did not chose to be treated the way she was. She has been pretty miserable and now on top of everything is of course the only bread winner, they are both 6-10 years out from retirement (though of course he does not work and is on disability such as it it) and she has to put 20 years in with the school city to get a pension and to continue any kind of insurance for them. It is a lot to put on one person so I kicked myself in the pants, gave myself a good talking to, and made a real effort to really get back in her life. It has paid off big time as her personality has shifted a little and I can enjoy being with her now. I have tried to convince her to move her and her dh down here when she retires as there is an assisted living retirement community not more than 1/2 mile from my condo where they could live. She actually has said she wants to move down here (Her two sons both have older wives and no children and her dd has two girls but they are 16 and 17 so unlike me, grandchildren would not be an issue) Anyway, that is her story and one I would not like to live. I have to applaud her courage for sticking it out. I adore Jack, but it would be really difficult to endure what she has endured the past 5 years.

I had a rough night last night coughing and spent part of it in the recliner. I am still kind of runny nosed etc but at least not coughing. It is kind of worse than a cold, because you cough but don't cough anything up to make it better. The reason I am not over it by now is that I have allergies to other things besides cats, ie pollen and our pollen is extremely high right now with the trees budding etc so there you go! lol

I am pretty miffed at the USPS. I needed stamps to get bills out today and went in to use their machines as the windows don't open until 9 am. I bought 10 stamps instead of 20 because I had a $5 and a bunch of quarters and it wouldn't take my quarters. The 20 book of stamps was the regular price of $7.40 but they charged $4.50 for the 10 stamps! I went ahead and bought them because I needed to get my ds and dil anniversary card out and my sister's bd card as they are the same day but burned me right up. What a rip off!

Well, I need to finish chores as I left to take Jack to work before I got them done.


04-07-2005, 10:20 PM
Good Evening, Flowers!
It's been a nice sunny day in my corner of the world although it is chilly. It's supposed to get down in the 30s tonight. BRRR! We had the windows open a couple nights and that was nice.

I am ready for Friday as it has been a long week. It seems like the teachers are all commenting about daylight savings time and how they are dragging this week. One of the staff members, tripped and fell at the local car dealership and broke both of her elbows. She just had a baby in December, her husband is a farmer, and she commutes 30 miles each way to school. The doctor has her in some sort of sling contraption and they will re-evaluate tomorrow. If the bones have stayed in place, they will put casts on; if not, they will do surgery and pin the bones. Either way it doesn't sound like much fun . . . think of all the things you do by bending your elbows! :eek:

Beth called a little while ago and Maddy has pneumonia. Will took her to the doctor and they rigged her up in some contraption for a chest x-ray and she screamed bloody murder. Then they did an oxygen breathing treatment where he had to hold her still and she had to breathe in/on this machine that looked like a snorkle tube. She cried through the whole procedure and he says he's never taking her to the doctor again! :cry: I could hear her wheezing over the phone and feel so bad for her.

I don't know much else newsy. Hope you have a nice evening and a fantastic Friday! :dance:

Jean -- :wave: from Iowa!

04-08-2005, 08:21 AM
morning ladies!

It is beautiful out this morning. I had to run to the store and get something for Jack for his lunch as I need to go to the grocery store and shop and haven't gotten to it yet. It is so nice and warm and spring like. It is supposed to be upper 70's near 80 for the next week.

Jean: Poor Maddy! Thomas has had pneumonia every year since he was a year old except this one and they had to go through the same routine with him. He is used to it now and just accepts it but he still cries having to put the stuff on. I think it is scary for them, poor things. Your poor co-worker. What an awful thing to happen. I would think she would be pretty much incapacitated as you said, you pretty much use elbows for everything!

We watched the "after" funeral this morning on tv. I have never seen so many people in my life. I kept telling Jack boy if the terrorists wanted a prime place to wipe out people, that would have been it. I guess air space was restricted and several countries including ours had Naval ships on the bay and our Navy planes were at an alert status ready to scramble in case of any kind of attack.

Tomorrow is my little guys first soccer practice. I can't wait to see him and see how he takes to being on a team. He goes to preschool three days a week but other than that, doesn't have kids he plays with and is with adults all the time. You can't count his Nonny who ACTS like a kid with him. I don't play soccer though! :lol:

Oh BTW, any of you readers absolutely must read The Same Sweet Girls by Cassandra King. It is a wonderful book and one I think you would enjoy very much.

I guess I should get up and get my chores done as I zoomed out of the house this morning while Jack was showering to go to the store

Have a good weekend everyone


04-08-2005, 09:20 AM
Good Morning!

It is rather cool this morning but the last few days have been sunny and delightful. DH is out walking a neighbor'd dog and I have a few minutes for the computer.

Next Friday we will have DD#2's dog Moshup for a week while she, SIL, & their 2 kids go to DC for 5 days. They hope to see as much as they can but are staying with his cousin in VA and I don't know how much time will be spent in DC itself. Should be a beautiful time for DC, not too hot.

Of course, with Moshup here it means that the neighborhood dogs can only look out their windows and cry. ;)

Have had another funeral this past week. Another one of DH's Air Force buddies died at 81. It is to be expected as they grow older but hard on DH as there are fewer and fewer of his buddies left. He had a long list of friends that he would call once a week or every other week and it is growing short. We also heard from his best friend, since high school, that he had to put his wife in a nursing home. She has Parkinson's and now an old cancer has come back and is in her lungs and liver and she is showing signs of Althimzer {sp.}. They have no children and he could not longer care for her at home. It is so sad. I don't think the drs gave her too much time.

We did get to the Cape for a few hours on Tuesday and stopped at my girl friends. They have weathered the winter and for, 83 & 86, are doing well. He, too has Parkinson's but the last visit to the DR. he was told his cholesterol was better that 3 years ago and that is without any medication. Actually he takes no medication and doesn't even wear glasses.

JEAN: So sorry to hear that Maddie has pneumonia. Hope that now it has been discovered she will be on the way to her old self soon. I know you are expecting more grandkids but I've forgotton when they are due. With all your school woes just remember that SUMMER VACATION will be here soon.

MAGGIE: So nice to see you back again. Hope you connection will hold up for a long while. I think shoe buying is one of the hardest if you can not try them on first. My feet are about half a size apart and on some styles it is impossible to get a fit for they will be too tight on one or slip off on the other. My, what would we do if we couldn't complain. :)

FATE: You are the Queen of Clean....I need to get you up here and get me started. I will clean a room but than I will look at the next one and it just makes me tired to think of doing it again. I keep up with the everyday stuff but deep down takes a lot more energy than I seem to have.

Gloria in MA....That's all for now! Have a great day and weekend!!!