Support Groups - Desperate Housewives #21 Thursday

View Full Version : Desperate Housewives #21 Thursday

01-20-2005, 08:45 AM
Welcome all to a thread full of wonderful women taking on the responsibilty of raising a family and trying to take care of themselves too. We look forward to a new day with members, new and old! Please feel free to jump right in and say hello!

Here is a little bit about who we are ...

MichelleRae: Michelle sahm to Taylor 8-25-01 & Teagan 10-13-03 Married 2 years to Zhaun. Plan I'm following is a combined WW and South Beach Diet.

Spryng: 24 y.o. married 6 years. Kids- Ava 4, Bubba (aka Joseph) 3 & Tanner 1. Currently on ww, hit goal in April.

Mompen: Penny 24 y.o. Happily Married & SAHM Momma to three active boys, Hunter 5, Nicholas 4 & Andrew 19 mo. Taking what I learned from WW & South Beach is my way of life.

Sydsmom: Kristin SAHM to Sydney 09-27-01, married almost 2 years to wonderful dh Began Weight watchers mid-July

Cindi: Mom to 6 boys & 1 mean girl. Plan.. No diet for me! Portion control, exercise & lots of water (most days)

Chubba: Geri..Mom to two boys, Will (3) & Tony (1)..married for 4 years to a great guy..following Dr Phil most days!

Crystal: 27 yo sahm of 3 almost 4. Alisa 6, Ally 3, & Andrew 22 months. Due Feb 1st. Married 9 years, live in Texas & homeschool. My plan, when on it, counting calories & exercise.

Ricci sahm to two boys 4 and 5, married 7 years, doing ww

Jill: SAHM of 1 daughter, Bayley, born 9/19/03. Currently trying to lose some of the baby weight I gained with her & need some extra support to help me do so.

Melissa: SAHM of 1 girl (4) and 1 boy (2). Currently watching what I eat and exercising 4-5days a week.

Deana: SAHM of 3 boys and 1 girl. Counting calories, exercising, and drinking lots of water.

Chris: SAHM of Tiana, Kayla and Nicole: ages 11, 5, and 2. Married for 5 years. I live in Billings, Montana. I'm a rheumatoid arthritis sufferer and trying using WW Flexpoints to lose weight

Gretchen, wife to Matt, Mom to Sean (15) and Jeremy (11). Just starting out with no diet plan except reduced calorie. I'm also a Curves lady!

Roxy, married (21yrs) 4 boys, and 6 girls, have to get serious after last baby. Doing the low-carb thing, drinking lots of water & more exercise

Stephanie, sahm of 2 boys Timothy(7) and Jack(3) and a new baby girl, Ella(8 months).

01-20-2005, 08:53 AM
:coffee: :coffee: :coffee:

Morning ladies. Didn't want to leave anyone hanging.

Roxy, that is a GREAT picture of you. I really do think so.

Hope everyone had a great night. I did for the most part. I did get out and walk yesterday for almost an hour. I did have some really, really mild contractions and they were real but they didn't last. I had them as I was sitting to eat dinner. Then I cleaned the kitchen, replaced the sheets on all the kids bed, put away another load of laundry thinking they would keep coming and they didn't. But I do think or know they helped me progress. So we'll try again today.
I'll be home today until about 330, have some errands to run and turn in Alisa's girl scouts cookie sale order form. Otherwise, I'll be around, we have to school and I don't know if I have anymore laundry. So I'll try some more walking outside.
I forgot to mention, I received my actual diploma from the School of Interior Decorating. It's the neatest thing. Maybe I can make something of it when things calm down. The baby is here and the house is done and this and that.
Okay, I've got Andrew trying to fit around me to get into something he doesn't need to be in. I'll check in later.
Hope everyone has a great day.

01-20-2005, 09:09 AM
Morning Ladies..

When is your next appt?

That is an awesome pic of you! You are too hard on yourself!

Hi :wave: to Redskirt ... Sorry to hear that you are having problems with putting the kids down... I wake my kids up around 7:00am and they are in bed sleeping by 9:00pm. I know it is hard to get them back on schedule when things get thrown off... I am sorry to hear that you are your husband are having problems. I will keep you in my prayers.

All I can say is that I wish you the best and we would love to have you here.

Hi out there to all you lovely ladies.. I gotta get the kiddos dressed and to the gym.

01-20-2005, 09:16 AM
Morning all!

Hi redskirt - it's perfectly natural to want (and need sometimes ) time to yourself, do don't stress about that. So, you're having problems with bedtime? Are the kids taking naps during the day? My youngest stopped needing a nap when he was about 2, and I fought it for a long time, since I figured all kids needed a daytime nap since my oldest did until he was well beyond 3 years old. Just a thought - maybe they are sleeping too much during the day. Do you guys have an established bedtime ritual? How about a warm bath and reading a story with the lights dim? Is there anything else going on that could be causing the "sleep-fighting?" My youngest still has a very hard time settling down at night and he is 11 years old. It's just a matter of re-wiring, so to speak. We make sure he is up before 9am on the weekends.

Roxy - great picture!

Penny - how is your son feeling today?

Crystal - I hope something happens for you soon!

Well, school is delayed 2 hours this morning (yes, our wimpy little 1.5" snow "storm" freaked everyone out...LOL), so the kids are still here for a little while. I think I'll take Jeremy to school instead of letting him take the bus so I have an excuse to get out of the house and get some much-needed errands done today.

I hope everyone has a wonderful day today.

01-20-2005, 10:36 AM
Morning Ladies!!!

Roxy (my e.t.): YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!!! I don't know how you look so young with all those kiddos but I need secrets ;) . I was so glad to see your face this morning, finally. I've been waiting for a pic of you :D . The sale I mentioned for the vases isn't until Sept. at our local Country Fair. I'm trying to get alot of them ready before then. For one thing they have to cure atleast 7 days before I can put them away, so I won't be able to make any more after about the middle of Aug. And once spring gets here I won't be able to do as much because there will be so many things to do outside. I'll let you know when it happens.

Mel: You are shrinking!!! WTG girl!

Michelle: No, I didn't get to watch AI last night. I watched some of the first season but to get tv time around here is like pulling eyeteeth :rolleyes:. Never have used a gazelle. My sil has one that she just HAD to have and never uses it :rolleyes:. She went on some crazy "lose it fast" diet and lost about 60-65 pounds in about 4 months. Now she has gained about 40 of that back....LMAO!!!! :rofl:. I tried to tell her but would she listen......

Penny: Hope Andrew is feeling better. Hope you're having a great day. Thanks for the im this morning!

Crystal: Hope the activity today helps out!

Cheri: Great new pic!

Gretchen: Too funny that 1.5 freaked everyone out. I'm in Missouri and we got almost an inch of ice the first week of this month and only canceled school 2 days. There are some places about 50 miles north of here that still aren't back in school :lol:. So glad you are enjoying Curves. I love it there!

Jill: Your family didn't need the flu anyway, right?!? Glad you were able to escape it. Hope things are going great with you!

Ricci: Hope school is still going well. Have you thought about getting some new workout videos or trying something new to keep you going?

Kristin: Slow down girl! All these birthday parties right after the holidays!!! :rolleyes: You must be feeling the headless chicken syndrome :lol3:

Chris: Are you working today? Have a great one!

Redskirt: Sorry to hear you are having problems with your dh. Hope things work out for the best soon. There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with taking time for yourself! Make sure you do or you will burn out on everything. I make time for me at night after the kids go to sleep or early in the morning before my dd (5) wakes up. As far as the kids going to sleep, have you tried staggering bedtime for them, i.e. putting one to bed and then the other maybe 30-45 minutes later. I have 3 in the same room and had to do that for a while, it helped. It is so hard to get back to a schedule after the holidays, guests or not. :goodluck: and post often so we can get to know you better. We start a new post each day so hopefully you found us today. BTW, I'm Deana, sahm to 3 boys 16, 9, 7 and 1 girl 5.

Hello :wave: to anyone I might have missed.

I've been painting on 12"x12" mirrors and trying to figure out how to frame them. I need to do it myself because frames are so expensive. Dh agreed to help me make them out of wood last night and we have a cabinet maker in town that we can have all the scrap wood we want so that will be a great relief. I love to recycle!

I finally got my digital camera sent off for repairs yesterday so hopefully I will have it back soon and I can join the next challenge!

Not sure how much I will get here in the near future. With my painting, scouts and tax season coming up I will be very busy. I do taxes for about 7-8 other people every year (and make some extra money for it) so it keeps me pretty busy. Plus doing ours on top of that, of course ours comes first ;) .

Hope everyone has a great OP day!


01-20-2005, 10:57 AM
Ps Crystal,
Congrats on the diploma :D

Hi to Deana and Gretchen!

01-20-2005, 12:31 PM
Morning All!
Thanks for all the compliments on my pic. I'm getting warm and fuzzy! I am sick today but not horribly so, so on I plod. I have three home from school today. It is currently snowing and we are supposed to get around 4".

Crystal- Congrats on the diploma! I hope that you will be able to use it. Hope that you get that walk in. I always found it hard to walk in the end!

Penny- How are you today? Is Andrew any better? Are you able to get to the gym today?

Redskirt- okay, we don't know you yet but I'm kinda old and this is what I'm hearing. That YOU are a little out of control and seem to be having problems. They are only 2 and 4, what's going to happen when they are teens? I've been married 21 years, same guy, and have ten children. While they don't always do what I want, I have to be able to make this family run (I didn't say run the family) smoothly or it would be horrible. My children fought each other on chores till I made out a chore chart. They could see it in black and white, if life was fair. No more fights. I suggest you make a good kid sleep chart Mon-Sat. Every night if they go to bed without argument, right away, they get a star. They really get into this. End of the week, if they have all their stars they get something special, an inexpensive book or treat. They catch on fast. Sorry to hear that things aren't the best with DH. A site that some of us like here is called it is not only a get your house under control but time management and making your household a blessing for yourself and others to live in. I hope this helps. Tell us more about yourself and post frequently, we'd like to get to know you! Good luck!

Gretchen- too funny about your wimpy little snowstorm! We're getting another 4" that will make 10 on the ground and we rarely close school. If the snow comes, at one time, around 10-12" or if the temps. get -30 or below actual ground temp. That's it. We're used to it though. have fun today!

Deana- my e.t.! Thanks for the lovely words. I'm blushing! You are now on my IM friends list so we can have evil conversations there too. :devil: It seems to be alot of work for your vases, but they are worth it aren't they? I hope they do well. I understand about having more to do in the spring. I for one can't wait to get out in the garden and get the chickens going again. We don't have them over the winter (too cold, too spendy). We get those seed catalogs in the mail and it's like Christmas around here. :lol:

Well, I think I'll slowly get things done around here and see if I can take a nap later, maybe. TTYL

~Roxy :(

01-20-2005, 12:44 PM
Good morning everyone. I got my aerobics in today. Working on my water. I hope you all have a great day. I have stuff to do, shopping, bills to pay etc. I will try to check in later.

01-20-2005, 01:41 PM
Hi Ladies!! I sure did miss all of you!! I had issues here I had to deal with. So, I've been spending time with God this week and cutting out my time on the computer. Now I am ready to vent... not really vent just talk about what's been going on.

Well DH and I are trying to buy a house. We were suppose to close in December but didn't have all the money together. On top of it my aunt used to live here and had really messed up the house(not to trash my family or anything) so the realtor wants us to fix everything! We have to replace all the broken window(which we already did), Paint the whole outside of the house and all of the inside. He had to pay for a dumpster to clean out the basement. We have to fix the front porch..and alot of other things and we have to pay for all of it out of our pocket when it wasn't us who made the house like this. When we almost brought this house 2 years ago it was in perfect shape. Anyways, the realtor called on Sunday and said that they are going to have to put the house back on the market. They said they will work with us even though the house is going back on the market. We plan on using taxes to close on the house. So there is still hope that we can buy the house. DH is stressed since his job has been REALLY slow. He feels that we've put alot into the house to think that we can possibly lose it.

With DH being stressed we haven't been getting along much either. So I took this week to step back and pray. I must say I feel 95% better. My tooth is absolutely killing me!! I can't eat because it hurts even worse when I do. I haven't eaten since Sunday. I just want all the pain to go away.

Well I better go.. the kids are hungry..
I will be back to personal with each of you after they eat. I'm going to have to go back a couple of threads to get caught!!

01-20-2005, 02:54 PM
Jeniqua, I am so sorry to hear about all of this. But yes times get hard for everyone and I think or should I say I KNOW you handled it perfectly correct by giving it all to God. ONly he can help you and only he can help you if you ask and apparently you have.
Things ALWAYS happen for the best and there is ALWAYS an underlying reason for everything even if you can't see it right away. I mean, it's easier said than done to accept these things sometimes.
I will keep you in my prayers and I really hope things start to turn around for you. But if things don't turn out the way you hoped they would or thought they would, remember God is in control and obviously there's a reason why things have turned.
About the tooth, I HATE the dentist but hate tooth aches as much. HOpe it gets better.
I'm finishing my lunch just to start lunch for the rest of the gang. I'll talk to ya later.

01-20-2005, 03:54 PM
Okay ladies I've been here off and on all day trying to find the words for what I want to say. I guess I will just come out and say it and just remember it's my opinion and while we're all entitled to our beliefs and such I feel compelled to say something.

Crystal, I strongly Disagree with your disciplinary action against your 2 yo for not taking a nap. I think spanking with a belt or any other "tool" is wrong and just teaches our kids that if they don't like something they can take care of it with violence. A "swat" (light slap) on the butt is one thing but a spanking with a belt is a whole other issue entirely. Also a 2 yo doesn't understand yet and I believe in the parenting method of positive reinforcement. Meaning we don't reward bad behaviour only good behaviour, in fact we don't give bad behaviour a whole lot of attention because it only feeds that thinking that it gets them attention so when they want attention they do the bad things that they shouldn't. So we only reward their good behaviour as it reinforces that they did something good and focuses on the positive. I believe that children who grow up amidst violence grow up to be numb to it and the damage it causes, of course this isn't true of all cases but a good plenty of them. I for one grew up with spankings and I don't mean a swat on the butt, but full out spankings with belts or paddles, this wasn't done by my mother but by the men in her life. I for one am breaking that chain of violent disciplinary actions in my family and it will stop here.

I'm sorry if anyone disagrees but those are my feelings on that issue.

And in light of your recent discussion about depression and your emotions etc. I'm also concerned that your emotions may spin out of control causing you to hurt someone. There is help and you can find it with a physician even if it is just to talk about how you are feeling. This is important, I'm not flaming you but instead very concerned for your well being and the well being of your family.

Moving on now, I've woken up with a sleep deprivation hangover lol Taylor was up when I got home from work last night and was up til 6 am finally she dozed off but then Teagan woke up and woke her up so I'm pretty tired as usual lol. I got my crunches in already and I also went and bought the gazelle, I'll let you know how I like it :) I had 1 cup of honey bunches of oats with almonds and 1/2 cup skim milk for breakfast. Dinner I am having a Lean Cuisine or something of the sort with a grapefruit and applesauce. I'll have a fruit smoothy for lunch, with fresh fruit. Hey can anyone recommend a good protein shake mix? I'm going to start adding that for lunch.

Well Hubby just finished assembling my gazelle I'm gonna go give it a try.
Have a great day!!

01-20-2005, 05:36 PM
First, thank you everyone for your support and encouragement. My name is Tabitha. I'm a 27(28 on the 23rd of Jan) sahm of 2, as y'all know already, 4 and 2 years old. I am overweight, and working on losing. I am now 100#'s from my goal! My H and I are having problems and will be seperating as soon as I get my car next week and have found a job. That will take a while, as I am going to go through the workforce center and join a program for people with no training and litttle or no positive work history. I am not really looking forward to going back to work, but at this point, there's not much choice. There are things between the H and I that I would like to talk about with you guys, but am not ready to do that just yet...Part of my problem is I have no friends or family here in town to talk to. My so called best friend only comes over when she needs something, and I guess since she has a new boyfriend, she doesn't need anything from me. Haven't heard from her in weeks. I know that sounds bitter and cynical, but it's the truth. I haven't had a car for six months, and I have rarely gotten out of a five block radius of my apartment in that time. It's quite frustrating, but I am getting a lot of exercise as I try to walk to the park with the kids at least 2 to 4 times a week. I am not going to be able to get my daughter back into pre-k because of transportation problems. I won't be able to get my car until next weekend, and the school had given me until today to solve the problem. So, that's that. At least my H works the evening shift, so when I do go to work he will be able to watch them. :) I am really glad to have found you guys. And I look forward to becoming a member of your group, if you'll have me.

1hot-tomato? Thanks so much for that FlyLady site! I went there and immediately joined! It really looks like something that will be a major help to me. Also, I thank all of you for the advice on bedtime. I will tackle it with patience and love. Tonight, I will put my 2 year old to bed at 9:30 and my daughter to bed at 10, and wake them up at 9:30 in the morning. Sometimes my son (2) needs a nap, sometimes he doesn't but if he hasn't had a nap by 1 pm, I don't think he should take one at all cause he is more likely to stay up later. As his naps usually last 1.5 to 2 hours. And I will lower the time to put them to bed and wake them up by 15 to 30 minutes every other day over the course of the next week, while reestablishing the bedtime ritual. I do love the kids, but it has been nothing but children 24 hours a day seven days a week with no time to myself for months now, and I do need that break.

On a completely positive note, while my son has entered the phase of dumping toyboxes for fun and pulling the books and movies off the shelf (it's all a game, and when he does it, I get him to help me clean it up, consistency there). He has also entered a different phase. I don't know if it's luck or blessing, but for the last few months he has shown great interest in the potty. And he would strip his clothes and diaper to sit on the potty after anyone had been in there to use the bathroom. To my utter amazement, today, he pulled his diaper off and sat on his potty chair in the middle of the living room, and went potty. What amazed me, is that the little cup thing wasn't in the chair and my H told him to hold on a minute so he could set it up for him. So Jeffery(son) stood there naked with his hand on his bottom looking at the chair and waiting. Then when all was ready, he sat down, AND WENT POTTY! Unfortunately, this potty chair doesn't have a sheild thing on it for boys, so payday, we are getting an insert for the "grown up" potty that has a sheild. So, it's not all bad, I actually cried, cause it seems like he is growing up way to fast. I am really having a hard time with the fact that Brianna(daughter) is about to be 5 in June and will be starting Kindergarten this year. And I know that it's not all bad. Heck, we have some of the greatest times together. And I fall in love with my children all over again when I watch them sleeping. I recognize them for the blessings they are. Anyway, thanks again for the advice and I will definatelhy be back. Thank you so much.

01-20-2005, 06:21 PM
First of all, I would like to thank Michelle for speaking on these issues.

I have also been upset about alot of comments and opinions that have been made on the board.

We have always been here for you and I understand that we all have different opinions or conversary on alot of issues. Spanking is one issue that I do not agree with. My Andrew is 19 months old and I have never and would never put a belt across his leg or anywhere else on his body "two good times".... or any times mind you.

I am very sorry you do not believe that depression is unreal... But infact depression is very real and an actual medical condition. Yes, God can help you see it through but it doesn't mean you don't have it.

As far as your husband calling the children and you words that put you down, please get some type of help or counciling. No one should have to "keep there children quiet" when there husband is in a bad mood.

I believe it might help if the children are in a structured schooling environment. I think it would help you and also them.

We are all friends here but we are all here for a main reason... Weight loss. I do not think it is fair for other members here that are trying very hard to be healthy for you to mention how much cake you ate or what unhealthy recipe you have used. It is just not fair.

Now, I am sorry if I upset you and I have never tried to flame another member of the board but I am not the only member that feels this way on all these issues.

Please take this as help and not bashing. We are not here to bash you at all! You have been here for along time. And we all want to help you! :grouphug:

I am off to bring the boys to karate.

Hugs to you all!

01-20-2005, 07:02 PM
Jenny, hope you are finding some peace. I will continue to pray for you this week.

ROxy, you do look young for having all those kids. Kids keep you young right.... BTW, you had some wonderful / helpful ideas for redskirt. I hope she finds them useful

Deana, I hope you don't leave us for long....try to check in at least once a week. We'd miss you! I know I will.

Redskirt. I know you must be having a rough go of it. CHildren are tough! ANd having relationship problems doesn't help. TRy to keep your spirits up! I don't know your situation too much, but maybe you should try to stay in the hotel room together. Maybe you just need time ALONE TOGETHER. It's amazing how sparks can fly. I mean if you don't get anytime together because the children are always running around then it puts a terrible strain on a marriage. Again, I don't know your situation. Just a thought. Prayers and good wishes to you.

Michelle and Penny, thank you for speaking out. I haven't been able to post today after reading what I read in crystals post. Being that I already said my peace the other day, I didn't want to be the first to speak out again.

Crystal, Hitting a child with a belt "REAL GOOD" two times is not something to be proud of. Children should know who is in control NOT BY FEAR, by love! GOD would not want you to hurt your child. By hitting you ARE hurting them mentally and physically. MY counsler has told me that it's ok to yell to get things out. People who don't are the ones who become violent. A tap on the butt, is one thing as Michelle stated, but a belt on a two year old. Is that really neccessary? I don't think so. YOu are a full grown woman and he is two. I think picking him up and closing his door and holding it shut would be sufficient to make him settle down. DOes you dh hit you when you don't do things>??? Maybe? I hope not, but if he you like it? I should think not. I always hesitate saying things, because of your condition of being so late in your pregnancy. You know I have tried to help you by sending you clothing for Andrew and all. But I think you are reaching sometimes for more help then that.

Anyway, on to why we are here. I was at the gym for 2 hours. with a total of 1 1/2 hour of exercise and my challange sit ups. I'm wishing on a star for a massage tonight. I am muscles were sore from not going for two days and from the stress this week. ahhhhh. Anyway, turkey chopmeat with sauce over a bit of pasta tonight. Hope it's good....

01-20-2005, 08:06 PM
Mel~ Thanks for your kind words. Yes, I have found complete peace this week!

Roxy~ You look great!!! You don't even look old enough to have 10 kids.

Crystal~ Still hanging in there? How are you feeling??

Penny~ How was your day?? Did you stay OP today???

Tabitha~ It's so nice to meet you. My best friend's name is Tabatha(with an a). My name is Jeniqua I am 28. I have 3 children Jasmine 5, Juliesa 4 and JT 2 1/2. I will be married for 6 years next month. It sounds like you have your hands full over your way too. Like Mel said, sometimes you just need ALONE time with each other. DH and I have been where you are at. We seperated 2 years ago but it only lasted for a month. The first couple of days we didn't talk at all but after that even though he didn't come back home for a month we went out every night after the kids were in bed and just spent quality time together. We both realized that the sparks were still there, we just weren't allowing time for each other. It REALLY does make a difference. It's just a suggestion from me as well. I must say though I am glad we've decided to work things out. We still have our days but we never forget to make time for each other, especially when we need it most.

Michelle~ Hey!! How are you today???

Chris~ Where are you girl?? How are you doing with your weight?? Are you staying OP??

Deana~ Where are you going?? You can't leave us!!! We'd definitely miss ya.

Ricci~ Great job on getting your exercise in!!

Gretchen~ Hi!! How are you??

Well it's 6 degrees here..YIKES!!! The lowest it has been here this week is -17. Besides my toothache, this has been a great week for me. I stepped on the scale and it says 162.5lbs!! I am soo happy. I would love to see the 150's by next month. I got a great surprise in the mail this week too!! Today in the mail I got a letter without a return address. I wasn't going to open it, in fact I almost ripped it up! I decided to open it and it was a check! Can you believe it?? I have no idea who it was from but it's going to be enough to help us get ahead!! I am over here thanking God!! I am soo greatful!!

I wanted to go to the gym tonight but DH just got home from work(he did an overnighter). I wanted to say thank you to ALL of you for your kind words. I greatly appreciate it!! I guess I better go exercise, huh?? Well I'm off..I'm going to walk to the store and back then do a workout video.

Lets stay motivated for the BLC! Lets make this a great 2 weeks!! We can do this!!

01-20-2005, 08:07 PM
Hey all,
I concur with everything that was said here. That having been said, I do hope that everyone who is feeling all of these negative emotions will do something proactive in order to feel better. I have been through a lot of stuff in my life so nothing fazes me too much, but it's important to be well mentally and physically.

I have been having some cravings this week for junk food, especially sweet stuff, but I have managed to fight it so far. I have been seeing some commercials for the Pria bar, made by Power Bar, and I tried one today. Not bad for 110 calories. I'm not one of those women who craves chocolate, but I do crave cakes and other treats.

I bought some of that new flavored tuna fish today and made some tuna patties tonight. The family hated them, but I thought they weren't bad. I'm getting a little sick of salad, though.

Jeniqua - sorry to hear about your troubles. What is wrong with your tooth? I had a wisdom tooth (not impacted) pulled last year, but no major trouble lately. I hope the house situation straightens out soon.

Roxy - you keep saying you're old! That's funny! YOu and I are the same age! You're only as old as you feel, right?

Michelle - how did you like the Gazelle?

I am going to work out tomorrow then go grocery shopping. Gotta stock up before the huge 3" storm we're supposed to get this weekend. LOL!

01-20-2005, 08:22 PM
Hi all.
I have realized, with no hard feelings, that I'm totally different than anyone here. I parent as my parents did with spankings and all. My parents were ALWAYS complimented for how me and my sister were so well behaved. She even once had a lady ask her to raise her two daughters so they would come out as good as me and my sis.
I do TOTALLY believe in spanking, not beating, but spanking on the behind. I think too many parents feel "bad" for it and you have these loser kids these days that don't have respect for NOTHING. I'm not saying that kids that aren't spanked turn out that way.
Nonetheless, I have grown close to alot of you here but don't feel comfortable here any longer. You have all been here during my pregnancy so I will keep you up to date on that and send you pictures. Otherwise, I have chosen to leave this forum for my after participation.
Thank you all for being there but we're just too different and that will become issues as it has. I wish you all lots of luck with your weight loss and with your families.
Thanks again.

01-20-2005, 08:45 PM
Just a fly by for me...I'll be back later. Crystal-I hate to see you go but I don't agree with your form of "discipline" either. I don't know what else to say...because I think you may be in a bad situation and don't realize it.


01-20-2005, 09:16 PM
Cystal, I'm sorry to hear you are leaving, but I think you are right and don't blame you for your decision. Your views are Very different then that of most of us. I wish you all the best and would love to hear the outcome of you pregnancy and baby. Prayers and best wishes to you. Be well.

01-20-2005, 09:41 PM
Well hmmmm,
Another interesting night at the forum! If I may put my two cents in on the dicipline issue. I slap hands, "No! don't touch! With those I can't reason with or hold them tightly so they can not damage or hurt themselves. I have swatted behinds before too. Usually for uncontrollable $hitfits! However, no, never, the belt or "tool". As I have more children under my belt now, I find I don't even have to spank hardly anymore either! I have perfected my evil mother glare and have different ways of punishment, suitable to fit the crime, so to speak. Usually just saying, "Well, Okay! I guess, (fill in name) doesn't want to be good...only good children get their pudding snack at supper." Which 90 percent of the time goes. "I'll be good!" I want them to behave themselves because they want to please me and be happy with themselves. Not to be afraid of me and learn to hide things from me because I might become angry. My state (MN) in particular, is an anti-spanking state and you can be arrested if you spank your children in public! They consider it public assault.
As for the "spare the rod spoil the child" mentality... that IS old testament along with stoning adulterers and not eating pork. I have yet to read a single passage of scripture where Jesus laid a hand on anyone, even in his anger in the temple chasing out the moneychangers. Also, I don't want any of my daughters to think that being submissive to her parents out of fear of a spanking is a just way to have a relationship with any man. If anyone touches her, I hope she hits back!!! Or tells her Father, WAR will commence! Women are still not equal to or even thought of as other than sexual objects for the taking by media and musical outlets. You can see this by watching MTV or anything else if you turn on the TV. What do all those rappers call their women? "Beeches!!"
You all know what I mean. Obnoxious, spoiled and warts on the backend of society are not cause by lack of spankings, but by lack of time, inattentive,and abusive homes. They don't even train dogs by hitting them! EH! I'm rambling on long enough. No one wants to see you leave the forum!
Things can always be worked out. Talking and really, self analysis is the ticket to improving oneself. Good grief!! Why the heck are all of us here anyway? To lose weight! I have alot to improve myself!! No one this side of heaven is perfect. Well, maybe Brad and Jennifer...wait, didn't he just cheat on her with Angolie? Or did the fact that she didn't want to ruin her body or carrer by having children drive away hunky Brad? Ya know, I think I just put in four cents.

Gretchen- hee hee I'm the co-oldest on the forum, that's what I meant! These young things, without wrinkles, don't even remember who Gilligan was!
I still run after babies and guess what! My girlfriend is having another one at 45! :lol: I'll be older but I'm not going down without a fight! :devil:

Jeniqua- thanks for the compliment! I'm glad things are going to work out, hopefully, for you! Whoever sent you that money is so generous! Isn't that a blessing?

Tabitha (Tabby)- glad you found the website helpful. I agree with Penny on being alone together! You need to recharge your love batteries!You are also under 30 and men think differently then we do. Also, let's face this one too, the weight issue. I started out around the same weight that you are. My dh was never mean but I know he would have rather had a healthy wife. You are making a fantastic effort by coming here and making a start!! Problems are always a two way street. I was listening to the radio when a man who left his wife because she was a slob, wanting advice. I wanted to tell her flylady!Sometimes people are so wrapped up in their pride they don't want to budge an inch. If your reasons for separation are valid, abuse, infidelity or something like that. It is an agony to stay. I feel that almost everything else can be worked out. He's going to be in your life like it or not for sixteen more years. Might as well make them good loving years!

Hi Michelle! ;) cutiepatootie! :lol:

Hi Ricci- are you having a good day.

My goodness, I'm talking and I can't shut up! I better go before I give my hand a hernia.BBL


01-20-2005, 10:11 PM
I have to add that I only spank when it's the last option. The belt is the only thing I use other than my hand. As I was trying to lay Andrew down for his nap yesterday and he got up five times, I started by just talking to him, then getting alittle more sturn in my voice, I tried by bribing him, you name it. As soon as I spanked him, he never once got up and he napped for 2 hours.
Alisa hardly ever gets spankings. Ally, once in a blue moon. As they get to a certain age I use things like grounding from certain things. I have great kids and well behaved kids. My kids love and adore me and don't even think of me as mean. My last spanking that I can remember as a kid was in the third grade for lying to my parents. I turned out great. My sis has 8 kids that have been complimented so many many times for their well behavior and she really spanks. She's moreso to do it than I am.
You are all taking it like a beating and I wanted to clear things up that that is the last option I give myself and you know what...everytime it works.
I know so many kids that don't get spankings or much of any discipline for that matter and they are the brattiest kids ever. No respect, no manners. Again, I'm not saying that kids that don't get spankings always come out this way.
I simply gave MY OPINION on the matter of depression and spankings and you all beat me down like I am wrong. I never once stated that any of you are wrong for your beliefs and opinions, yet you all make it out like you all are right and I am wrong without realizing it's opinions.
Now I understand why Spryng would never get involved in these issues and I've learned my lesson. HOwever, usually with friends you can agree to disagree.
My feelings aren't hurt, so don't think they are. I've just gotten burned. I can lose weight with God in control of my life and with the help of my dh.
Again, wish you all the best. I just felt like I should set things straight.
Good night.

01-20-2005, 10:30 PM
Thank you very much for "clearing" things up.....

This is not the only time you have mentioned spanking the kids... I have heard comments about telling them to be quiet all day or you will "snap" or the kids had to be quiet b/c your husband was in a bad mood... Or even to have Allison to get it out the way and get a break?? I'm sorry but this type of emotions sound like you need to get some help. And that is all we are saying...

And I get compliments ALL THE TIME about how well behaved my children are and they don't see that very often anymore! ..... And that is with no "tools"

My issues are not just with spanking or depression but the whole demeaner that comes... As if no one else's situation is as important as yours..

And in my personal opinion, if you can't even speak with your husband then how will you lose weight with his help... And why haven't you had a healthy pregnancy??

I'm not here for a bickering contest and I will not continue to!

I am just tired by the whole situation and wish you the best in your life... I hope things will turn out for the best whatever that may be!

Hope everyone has a wonderful night..

I know I will hug my kids a little tighter tonight

01-20-2005, 10:38 PM
Wow. A lot has gone on since I posted last night. I don't believe in spanking either, but that is all I'm going to say on the subject. I think everyone else pretty much said it all. Crystal, I wish you well and hope you take care of yourself and have that baby soon. Keep us updated. Welcome Tabitha. I am Stephanie and am 27. I have been married for almost 6 years( feb 12) and have 2 children. Brandon will be 7 on Feb 18 and Kayla is 4. I aslo have a 10 year old stepdaughter named Ashley. Sorry to hear about the troubles in your marriage. Can't offer too much advice since I don't know the underlying issues, but time apart might be good for you. Good luck with the job situation.Jeniqua- glad to hear you got some unexpected help. That's always nice. Hope everything works out for you. Mel- you workout machine you. I went to the gym again tonight. Hello to everyone else! Sorry I can't get more personal, but I need to finish my laundry befor bed. See you tomorrow.

01-20-2005, 10:51 PM
I have spoken with other members of the thread and we have decided to



01-20-2005, 10:53 PM
C ya at the new thread :)