Support Groups - Sanctuary-- New Thread! Anyone Welcome :)

01-09-2005, 01:32 PM
A few friends and I were talking about what we really want in a weight loss support group, and we came up with some very specific ideas. They all boiled down to one concept; we are looking for a sanctuary.

Sanctuary means different things to different people. Sanctuary is a place of peace, rest, safety, and rejuvenation. It keeps our spirit and our sanity intact.

Many of us who have a long journey down the weight loss path find ourselves in need of a break. Sometimes our bodies crave it, and sometimes the choice isnít ours, but circumstance forces it upon us. Other times, we need the clamoring throng to cheer us along our way as we breeze past milestones and overcome obstacles.

Sanctuary can be all that as well. It is what you need and when you need it. Sanctuary can be found in good friends who arenít afraid of your truths and in an open, honest atmosphere.

Sanctuary isnít judgmental, neither does it discriminate or ask to be censured. It is open to anyone with a desire to share, and especially those in need of and willing to offer support.

Andria :)

01-09-2005, 03:50 PM
Sounds like a lovely place to me! I'm here! I look forward to spending a lot of time here, thanks for starting this up, Andria!

We can always use a little sanctuary in our lives. Sometimes we have to create our own out of very little, but it can be done. It's called 'finding your happy place.' Think of something that makes you smile, feel peaceful or loved. Create an imaginary place or conjure up a happy memory and really focus on everything in it. Shut out the clamoring world and just give yourself over to this happy spot for a few minutes. Take a few deep breaths. Smile. Then come back to the real world feeling refreshed.

And then come post here and tell us all about it!

Or, tell us about your weight loss adventures. Or whatever you feel like talking about! Looking forward to meeting some friendly folk!

A little about myself. I'm a 47yo, married mother of two, working the night shift at a local hospital. I have, as my ticker thing shows, roughly 119 lbs to lose. *groan* I mean...that I INTEND TO LOSE this year! This will be the year for me. No more wishy washy, half a$$ed dieting...this is it!

That's it for now. Thanks again, Andria!

01-09-2005, 04:58 PM
Kat: I hope I qualify. :)

I don't have much time to post but saw the intriguing thread name and had to pop in. I am having family over to cheer on the VIKINGS !!!

Dang there are here already - I shall return.

Thanks, Andria.

01-09-2005, 05:12 PM
Just the name "sanctuary" has a peaceful ring to it, and I think in this weight loss journey it is exactly what is needed. I hope to get lots of inspiration from these forums and make new friends as well. Best to everyone in 2005!

01-09-2005, 06:40 PM
Hi there to Kat, Lucky and Kiteen :)

Kiteen, I see you are brand new here on 3FC. This site is full of great info and lots of supportive people. :)

Guess I'd better do a bit of an introduction myself. I'm a 38 y/o mom of two girls with a significant other who also posts on 3FC. My high weight was 338 lbs., but I signed a contract with myself this last year and kept to losing approximately a pound a week. Some weeks were more, some were less, but the overall effect was 52 lbs. off! Yes, I'm tooting my own horn. :) Now, as you might notice from my weight ticker, I still have a decent ways to go. I'm shooting for 52 lbs. again this year. I'll accept anything over that, of course. ;)

I work the night shift and I'm supposed to be sleeping right now. Guess I'd better get to that, because without sleep, I end up feeling like I should be diving into a vat of chocolate.

Do we want to talk about what food and exercise plans we are on, that sort of thing? I figured we would make this up as we go. :)


01-09-2005, 09:26 PM
GREAT News!!!! Bad news - we play the Eagles next weekend. I guess there won't be anymore football talk here, right Kat? Kiteen.

I am temporarily single, 53, live on a farm with my cat Dusty and will be working hard on losing weight following Dr. Phil's 7 Steps.

Andria, my plan is to post my weight LOSS and minutes exercised for the week as of each Thursday. I have found this helps me, knowing I am being accountable (even if you don't read it!! :lol: ) One of my goals is to also be able to do those dang pilates. :D So far I haven't been very successful :mad:

I will have my goals determined by this Thursday - the beginning of this year has been sad and exhausting so I am behind on my planning.

I have to get over that "everything has to be perfect" mentality before I do things for myself.

A Sanctuary will help! ;)

Well, it's almost time for Desperate Housewives :s: so I am ending this for now.

01-10-2005, 09:58 AM
Good Morning, chickies...Welcome, Kiteen!

I'm heading for bed after a l o n g night at work. The work itself itsn't bad...I'd rather be busy all night long than sit around, doing nothing, complaining about how busy I am. Like half the people I work with do. The exhausting part is dealing with a grown woman, who has taken it upon herself to trash me at every given opportunity. Generally, I let actions speak louder than words, most people there know me and what I'm like, and I always thought it was quite obvious what kind of person she is....most people know that she is a nasty, vengeful gossip.

So, why does it bother me so much? And it really bothers me that it does bother me!

Dh says I should confront her, but I don't want to give her the satisfaction of knowing that she got to me. And when you come right down to it...what do you say, anyway? "Stop talking about me! Wah!" Sounds so childish, and the situation is, which is another reason I hesitate to do anything. Don't want to stoop to her level.

So I just keep plugging along, but it makes for a l o n g night, like I said.

I think I'm PMSing too! which is NOT helping!

So, I came here, to unload my woes, and then I'll hop into bed...thinking nothing but good thoughts as I go to sleep. I intend to wake up happier than I feel right now.

Then I'll be ready to talk weight loss and football and such.
Eagles v. Vikings, you say, Miss Lucky? Okay, I guess I'll have to watch this game! For you. And Thong Boy.

01-10-2005, 10:19 AM
Hello girls :)

Sorry I didn't post earlier, but my internet went down last night (stupid Cox Internet).

Kiteen: Hello, welcome to the thread :)

Lucky: I hear you on the slow start to this year. I think my year actually started today; the last 10 days has been sort of a weird haze (which is somewhat troublesome, because classes started last Monday *laugh*). I did go work out on Saturday, and will do so again today, starting my daily routine.

Kat: We all know there are always people like that in the world; usually, I try to just not associate with them, but in your case, that isn't an option, is it :( Personally, I would start logging incidents, then present them with a formal complaint of unprofessional behavior. That probably will have the most effect, without alerting her to your plans prematurely.

My weight _finally_ started creeping down again Saturday; I put on like 10 pounds over the last couple of weeks, from the extended vacation time. Ah well; I'll still below my original goal weight, that counts for something, right? :)

Have a great day :)

01-10-2005, 11:13 PM
Hey everyone :)

I finally made it back online! We have satellite internet, which is wonderful if you are out in the boonies and can't get anything else, but has the down side of not working well or at all during bad weather. Well, we've had enough rain in this part of the state to begin talk of building arks! Seriously, there is flooding all over. At work last night you could here the creek behind us growing all night long. By morning it looked like a scary river and was about to spill over. Bridges are out all over the place and there are entire communities without any access. Since the rain is still falling, we will have to wait and see how this all turns out. For now, I'll be grateful for high ground here at home and a chance to get onto my 3FC. :)

Have to share something funny I realized last night. I can hardly wait for my next Weigh In! You know when you can just feel a good one coming? I've been working my food plan, plus I've been exercising pretty steadily. This just feels like it is going to be a good week!

My food plan is from a place called Decision Weight Loss. I heard about them on the radio and dropped in. Their plan made sense to me because it was based on balance, something which I've been striving to reach in my life. I'm supposed to eat 6 times a day, with the meals made up of a grand total of 4 proteins, 4 veggies, 4 fruits (nothing canned except pineapple and nothing dried), 4 starches, 3 dairy, 3 fats, 2 supplements and 4 extras. Yes, that is a lot of food. I lose better when I actually eat it all. How weird is that?!

I've got to run, be back as soon as I can! :)


01-11-2005, 12:01 AM
Hi Everyone!
I thought I'd pop in here to the Sanctuary! I love it!! I have been doing my best to fill my life with peaceful and positive thoughts recently and this may be just what I need. I look forward to hanging out with all of you!

A quickie about me....I am 34, live in the burbs of Philadelphia. I've been married to my DH for 10 years. I've been overweight as long as I can ever remember. There are some significant milestones that stick out.....
Beginning of Freshman year of college: 241
Mid-Fresh yr of college in 1988: 211 (my lowest adult weight after some time with Nutri-System - ick!)
College Grad in 1992: 268
Marriage in 1994: 250
Beginning 2003: 328
End 2003: 288
Now: Right at/around 300
Sorry - just got sidetracked a bit thinking of that. It's funny how certain things just stick out.

I lost nearly 50 pounds at one point in 2003 with diet and exercise - what a novel idea! :lol: Then when my husband and I found ourselves in the dreaded world of infertility and hormonal drugs I put some back on. Now I am just fighting to keep my head above water and juggle diet, exercise, emotions, treatments....

It is great to have wonderful internet buddies to laugh, cry, celebrate and hang out with.

Wow, I just realized I am rambling a bit. Please don't think I am too nuts! Have a great night and I'll talk to you soon!

:) Barb

01-11-2005, 12:31 AM
I hope everyone here had a lovely day and felt good about their eating habits and exercise this day! Today was my first full day of NS foods, and I must say, I did not feel hungry at all! I felt like I had plenty to eat and enjoyed the flavor of my food as well. I am sorry to hear about the bad weather up north, we here in Florida are warm and dry right now. Is there anyone else here who is on Nutri-System? I am also interested in knowing what any of you have done or will be doing to take care of the skin while losing weight. I am over 40 and I worry about sagging skin and extra flesh etc. Anyone else in the same boat?

Warmest wishes to all!

01-11-2005, 05:42 AM
I was off last night...went to bed around 10:30, but had already slept a few hours in the now I am W I D E A W A K E! I did toss and turn for a while thinking, I'll just wait til dh gets up (5:30ish)...tossed some more and got up, thinking, I'll get his coffee ready! :love: Then I saw what time it really was...He won't be wanting that for another TWO HOURS!

So. I think I'm up for the day. I've already put the dishes away and tidied up the kitchen. I'm having an orange and a cup of tea. I tried to weigh myself but my scale is telling me 'LO,' time for a new battery.
WHEW! A reprieve! :lol: Oh, I'll go get one today, it won't be for long! I'm thinking about getting over to the gym when they open up at 5:30. Hey! It's possible!

Hi BARB!!! I'm so glad to see you! I can relate to you about the milestones....

High school, 1975...149...I thought I was fat. I wasn't, but I had grown up chubby, heard about it all my life from my brothers, and so it stuck.
Marriage, 1983...169...I thought I was fat (of course) but one of my bridesmaids weighed exactly 100 lbs more that I I thought she was HUGE! heh...Karma's a *****!
Pregnancy, 1985...199... The first day I stepped on the scale in the obstetrician's office, was the last day I weighed in the 100s, TO THIS DAY!
Four years after first child born...1990...I'm not sure of the number, but I had dieted vigorously, and lost around 40 lbs. I guess I looked so good, I found myself pregnant with child #2. :lol: Again with the Karma!
1998...274... highest weight ever...started Weight Watchers, lost 40 lbs...and have managed to slowly put every last lb back on over the past 6 years.
Present...269... :yikes:

Gee, that was fun. :(

So, now what? Well, I intend to lose every last pound I gained and then some. I know the place to start is in my head. I have to drive out the notion that I am a FAT person and will always be a fat person. I am a person. That's all. I have the desire, and the capabilities to succeed. I know everything there is to know about dieting, having been a life long dieter. I need to JUST DO IT. And I will. Just watch me!

How? I tend to stick with Weight Watcher's Point System, since I know that best. I try to stay on the low-ish carb side and drink a ton of water. I think the number one way to lose weight and keep it off it REGULAR EXERCISE. I'm trying to make that a daily priority in my life.

You asked about saggy, loose skin as you lose weight, Kiteen...I believe that regular exercise will take care of that. I just read an article at the WW site, about a woman who lost 200 lbs. She looks fabulous and attributes her tight skin to regular exercise............

So. What am I waiting for? Oh, that's right the gym's not open yet.

Sorry this is so long 4am, no one is clamoring for my attention or the computer!

Andria...Try to stay dry there, kiddo! Decisions sounds interesting...lots to eat there! If you don't mind my asking, how do you break down your meals? Show me a typical day's menu. Yes. I'm nosy.

Tony! We all know there are always people like that in the world; And how! I felt like I was living in parallel universes there for a while! Thanks for the advice. I'm reading a book called The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. It's described as a "practical guide to personal freedom." I've only covered the first two agreements so far, but let me tell you, they are so simple, and make so much sense!
1. Be Impeccable With Your Word.
2. Don't Take Anything Personally.
3. Don't Make Assumptions.
4. Always Do your Best.

I'm finding that by following these as best I can (I need practice...and patience!) I can usuallyoverlook her shenanigans! I'm getting there!

Lucky...where are you, my friend? :kickcan:

Well, I've killed an hour here, I'm going to get my gym clothes on, make some coffee and maybe make a shopping list and not squander this peaceful time that I have all to myself!

Have a great day all...See you later!

01-11-2005, 09:55 AM
Good morning :)

Ok, I can see I'm not the only one out there who woke up super early this morning. I've been up since about 4:30 and wondering what in heaven's name is wrong with me?! I had to laugh at Kat's post. I thought about getting up and making breaky for everyone and then realized there wasn't any reason to since they wouldn't be eating it for hours yet. I was about to make a cup of tea, and there is an orange sitting on the counter... Kat, just sounds like a good idea. :)

Milestones, hmmm... Yes, I've played this game in my head plenty of times. Can't hurt to get them out here so they don't take up so much space! :lol:

160--1983, just before starting senior year of high school. Drama coach tells me I'm too fat to be given a leading role. First time I remember light switch clicking on in my head. I stopped eating, began to exercise at an extreme level, and lost 30 lbs. in three weeks. Played Rosie in Bye Bye Birdie.

1988-- Can't remember the starting weight, how odd, but remember I lost 60 lbs. on the lowest carb diet you can imagine. This thing made Atkins look carb heavy! Actually called the plan Love a Loser. Mostly I remember getting down to a size 12 and all sorts of guys hitting on me. I got sick from the strict diet and scared from all the guy attention and gave it up! Gained back the 60 in no time flat, think it was less than 6 months.

180-220-270something--1990, Pregnant with first child and the weight is piling on fast! Went from 180-220 in 3 months. Was working full-time as a waitress and taking pregger aerobics classes, but the gallon or more a day of full fat milk and all those turkey hot dogs I was craving really did me in?

260s--1991, I'm determined to lose this weight and throw myself at a gym 6-7 days a week and a stupid diet program that leaves me eating 600-900 calories a day for about 6 months. I honestly stuck to it, but my bod must have been shutting down by then. By all rights, I should have been lots smaller in that amount of time.

280s-- 1995, Lost 40 lbs. with diet pills and 60 minutes, 5 days a week of aerobic water walking. I still love the water walking, but the pills made me forgetful and angry all the time. Upside of this one, I got pregnant with our second child!

Hrm, going to post this and return in a bit. My eldest (14 y/o) woke up early and isn't feeling well. :( I do want to finish writing out this timeline. It is being an eye opener for me.


01-11-2005, 03:48 PM
Hey everyone :)

Ok, I am massively frustrated! I got back online and had just about finished a huge long post, finished up my timeline/milestones and had replies to everyone, and the power went out! AAAaaaAaAAaarrrrGGGGGhhhHHhhhhh!!!
That will have to do for a primal scream. :lol:

I'm going to hit post now so you know what is going on, and then I'll work on redoing the other. There are going to be lots and lots of saves involved here, be warned! :lol:


01-11-2005, 04:06 PM
It IS cathartic and eye opening, isn't it? Timelines, I mean...I highly recommend it!

Tony...I just have to say "Bravo" to you! And I think you know why. My First Agreement (Be Impeccable With Your Word) prevents me from going any much as I'd LOVE to!!! :cp: :cp: :cp:

I have to report that I have had a very productive day, exercise-wise. I did go to the gym, but not at 5:30! :no: Nay, I took a 9am "Gentle Aerobics" class. I thought that I should take it easy, as my knee has really been giving me some trouble. It was gentle, but that's not to say that it wasn't a great workout. Constant motion for about 40 minutes, finished up with some exercises using the big *** ball! Fun! I had walked for about 15 minutes on the treadmill before class started, then used the series of upper body machines. Food has been great...I even went to lunch at TGIFridays with my sis and remained quite OP. Traded my mashed potatoes for an extra serving of veggies, skipped the breadstick and croutons with the salad, and had Grilled Salmon with Jack Daniel's sauce. :T I still have to calculate my points, but I know I'm well within range. It feels good to be in control.

Okay...I'm outta here. See y'all later!

01-11-2005, 09:06 PM
Kat:So, why does it bother me so much? And it really bothers me that it does bother me! I know what you mean. It's the fact I let something get to me that is unimportant that "gets" me too. Maybe you think the situation is childish but it always helps to talk to friends. :)

Glad you made it to the gym.

WHAT do you mean where am I??? At 4AM I am sleeping!!!!!

Andria: You sound psyched and happy with your week going so well.

Barb: :dance: Happy to see you post. I have been doing my best to fill my life with peaceful and positive thoughts recently and this may be just what I need. I look forward to hanging out with all of you! I know my life is so much better when stay positive and peaceful. The question is "WHY" do I slack off???? But then like everything else staying peaceful and positive takes work too. ;) I loved It is great to have wonderful internet buddies to laugh, cry, celebrate and hang out with. That's what we are here for!!! :yes:

Kiteen: I am also interested in knowing what any of you have done or will be doing to take care of the skin while losing weight. My plan is to exercise a lot. I have heard from others that that is what works the best. Well, other than surgery.

Hmmm my timeline:
High School - Don't really know. We never owned a scale :D
I weighed 130 to 135 until 7 years ago. But, I wasn't all that happy during that time - just treking through life. I guess I am, at my age now, trying to have a happy, fulfilling life - once again WORK!!!!

I guess that last paragraph shoots down the theory that I will be fulfilled and happy when I lose weight!!!!

Tony: While having the fulfilling, happy life thought I realized I have many people of many religions that pray for me. So, I was wondering if a Buddhist prayer might be just what I need?

I desire a right & perfect mate (male); wealthy; supportive; understanding; loving; romantic. Oh, and he worships ME!!! :lol3: Oops forgot sexy - I may have to keep adding things to the list but you get the idea. The reason I want this is because I have failed at it in this lifetime and don't want to leave this earth until I get it right. NOT just because I want a wealthy man so I can quit my job and travel to New Jersey, Florida, Pennsylvania, Utah, and the state where you live that I forgot. :sorry:

Okay, it's late and I haven't done a darn thing yet.

Thursday I weigh in and from there on it it's exercise, exercise, exercise, exercise, exercise, exercise, exercise!!!! You will help me, right. :^:

01-11-2005, 10:33 PM
Hey everyone :)

Things are just nuts in my area. My house and about everyone I know here is safe tonight, but the flooding has become much worse. People are sandbagging as fast and hard as they can, but homes are still being washed away. I haven't heard reports of anyone dying, and we'll just hope things stay that way. There was a landslide up in the park (we live 20 minutes outside Zion National Park), lots of roads are closed, bridges have been washed out and at least one dam is looking like it might not hold.

I still haven't been able to sit down long enough to rewrite that other post. I have a big family, and they all keep calling here to check on my dad's house since it is just down the street and within about 60 yards of where the river is running right now.

I think I've talked to all of them for now, so I'm going to take a break and go make dinner. Take care!


01-11-2005, 11:09 PM
Andria: You and yours are in my prayers - keep safe.

southern gal
01-11-2005, 11:24 PM
Hi all!
I love the idea of a "santuary"! The thread name intrigued me and the posts here sound all too least with my own story! I am hoping that this group will fit my need for support. And santuary (I really like that!).

Background info on me: I'm a 46 (almost 47) year old mother of two and 1st grade teacher. My household consists of husband who owns a Little Debbie distributorship (how's that for a weight watcher challange), a 15 year old boy with a learner's permit, a 13 year old boy with a strange sense of humor, a spoiled Springer Spaniel named Hershey, and two equally spoiled classroom pet guinea pigs (who come home with me everyday because I feel sorry for them being left alone at school).

I've lost weight on numerous occassions but have unfortunately gained it back. The timeline concept is an interesting idea. I'll have to see if I can remember back that far...

This year, I've made a promise to myself that I will lose this weight and keep it off. I'm tired of being unhealthy.

Andria, I'm saying a prayer for you and your family. Things sound really scary where you are. I look forward to getting to know each of you and wish you well through out your weight loss journey.


01-11-2005, 11:32 PM


After reading your 'background' I definately need to go to bed - it made me tired reading it! :lol:

AND a Little Debbie distributorship - Oh My!! I LOVE those chocolate/wafer/peanut butter ones - I NEVER buy them because I can't resist them!!!

Looking forward to getting to know you. :lucky:

01-12-2005, 11:17 AM
Good morning everyone! :)

I woke up early again! At least it was an hour later than yesterday. :lol: I'm sitting here with some peppermint tea (sweetened with Splenda) and a piece of whole grain wheat toast with FF cream cheese and SF blackberry jam. It is nice and quiet except for the wind howling outside, and quite frankly, this is the best time for me to find Sanctuary. :)

I got my first restaurant review job! I am so nervous, you just don't know. I'm supposed to go eat at this totally swanky restaurant, interview the owners, and write about 800 words on the whole experience. I've only eaten lunch at this spot once, and it was a really terrific experience. To be honest, dinner is way out of my price range there, and my weight loss efforts are just fine with that as well! :lol: I have decided that I will eat and enjoy the dinner, but I have promised myself that I will order responsibly.

I'm also supposed to be turning in one of my opinion editorials today, but I've been waffling on the subject matter. Part of me is angry and wants to write about the evident graft that must have occurred to let people buy and build in what is obviously flood plain. Too many people have lost their homes. My original intent was to write about the contract I made with myself this time last year and how far I have actually come since that time. I wanted to encourage others to follow suit and show that it really can be done. That reminds me. I seriously need to get them to put a new picture of me in with my byline. The current pic was taken at my high weight, and I'm told I barely resemble that person any longer. One serious compliment there!

Laura, Welcome! I'm glad you found us, and we hope to hear a lot more from you. :) I don't think I could survive the Little Debbie's thing. But then, I am not sure I'd survive 1st graders, either! :lol: My oldest daughter is 14 going on 30, and my youngest is 8. :)

Lucky, you know we will be helping you with that exercise the best we can! Did I mention that I have a whole new series of physical therapy exercises that involve the big *** ball? I love that thing! And we'll keep putting energy into the perfect guy for you. :)

Kat, sounds like you really did have a great day! Bravo on the way you traded out your foods and stayed OP. :) I really understand the problems some days of exercising when your knee is acting up. Have you considered asking your doctor for a physical therapy referral? They could give you some specific exercises for strengthening that area and might possibly help you to avoid an injury. PT is spendy, but I can't believe the difference it is making in my recovery.

Kiteen, I've heard of Nutri-Systems, but I haven't ever tried their program. Sounds like you are really happy with it, though! :) As far as extra skin goes, my understanding is that a lot of it is genetic, and the rest appears to be slow and steady weight loss backed up with toning exercises. There are two ladies at the Curves I go to that have lost over 100 lbs. now. Neither of them has any extra skin on their body, and they are so excited! Both of them are later 40's, and they assumed that losing the weight would mean surgery for extra skin removal. I guess we will all have to wait and see. :)

BarbPA, you do realize that Sanctuary was partially your creating, don't you? You had posted elsewhere about the safe, quiet space you had created for yourself, and the idea just naturally grew into this. :) I think that happy place is important for all of us, especially when the outside world seems intent on banging at our door until we answer. You and your DH are in my thoughts and prayers. :)

Fierum, hey you :) (Yes, this is my sweetie!) We don't really reply to each other on here because we talk daily, so no one get weirded out over that! Actually, I love one thing that he does which allows me to be supportive of his weight loss as well, and I wanted to share it with all of you. Several nights a week he calls while he is at the gym. Since I know he is going to be calling from there, it encourages me to get off my duff and get to Curves! Yes, I did go last night. Forgot to tell you. :o

The youngest is up and thinking she wants breaky or something. Silly child! The girls are both home today because school was cancelled countywide. At least the sky is blue this morning and I can't see the river from my house anymore! Thanks for all your prayers, everyone :)


01-12-2005, 02:13 PM
Woo-hoo! I weighed in this morning and found another pound gone! :D Having as much to lose as I do one pound seems like a tiny drop in a huge ocean but for means another small success. Hearing from all the others on this website and in this thread is SO inspiring for me. I love to read the posts here and feel that it is my sanctuary. :smug: Qsilver thanks for the tips about sagging skin! I am going to be doing Pilates to gain muscle and get stronger. Everyone have a lovely day!

01-12-2005, 06:55 PM
Oy, I need two windows open to post; one to keep up with what's going on, and the other to actually write a post in. I guess all that means is that I should post more often, huh ;)

Kat: I knew if anyone would be able to appreciate it, you would :) There are just some tasks in life that are just so innately satisfying when you do them well, you know? ;)

Lucky: Of course you'll be in my prayers (of sorts) :) I don't particularly pray nor meditate, but do know that I'm sending happy lucky thoughts your way ;) And the state I live in is posted just beneath my avatar *blink* :)

Kiteen: I'm glad to hear that Nutri-System is working out for you! It's my opinion that there is no "right" nor "wrong" way to lose weight; you just try them until you find something that works, and you stick with it. And yes, I know that the 1 pound drop seems like such a small step, but all great wonders were made up of such small steps (except for the Pyramids of Egypt...those ancient Egyptians were hardcore, I tell you.)

About the loose skin, I find that the skin tightens up in time. Remember, your body isn't a static structure; your cells are continually remodelling it into how they feel will be the best form for what they need to do. Once you lose weight, it may take a while, but your body should remodel itself tighter so it can better support itself. And if the results are still unsatisfactory, then there's always the option of surgery.

It's unfortunate that society has such a love/hate view on plastic surgery. The very idea of it has become a social taboo linked with vanity, even though there are some very valid reasons to have it done; personally, I believe this to be one of them. You've worked hard to get rid of the weight, there's no reason you shouldn't have the self-esteem to match.

Laura: Wow, two teenage boys. I bet there's never a dull moment around your house :) And welcome!

BarbPA: Good to see you here, as well! :)

I finally kicked my butt into gear and started working out this week. After the winter break and being sick at the end, I was soooo unmotivated. However, I've shed 6 of the 10 lbs I put on, so I'm well on my way again *cheer self*. Unfortunately, my left shoulder's started giving me issues's been getting sore since about August, but especially during the times that I'm consistently working out. Can't seem to find anything overtly wrong with it, so my best guess is a small tear in the rotator cuff. It doesn't affect my strength or freedom of motion any, it just aches.

Back to study for me, I'll check in later :)


01-12-2005, 07:50 PM
Tony, I was thinking on the way home you should know the answer to the skin question HOWEVERfrom your picture I know you are young - SOME of us have OLD skin - which brings up another question.

If skin is constantly replacing itself - WHY oh WHY does wrinkled skin come back as wrinkled and NOT nice new fresh and smooth skin???? :?: :?: Huh, WHY?????

Also did you hear that the people who think they know everything annouced we are to exercise 90 minutes a day!!! GET REAL....not many have that much time each day!!!!

Off to see my Dad - later :lucky:

01-12-2005, 08:01 PM
Hey everyone :)

:bravo: Way to go Kiteen! I have to totally agree with Tony, some things are done best one step at a time. I have to remind myself of that constantly, it seems! But then, I remember when just getting back under 300 seemed like it wasn't ever going to happen. Almost all of that came off one pound at a time. I haven't ever dared try Pilates. Let me know how it works for you, please. :)

Tony, You already know how proud I am of you for your terrific weight loss and how well you are doing at maintaining it. :) Take it easy on that shoulder. *Hugs* Somehow I need to talk you into posting a pic of us back in May of last year and then the one you took in December. You can see real improvement in both of us, but mostly you. :)

Do any of us have small goals on the way to our larger goal? I know WW usually does 10% goals, and that is what I decided to go with. My first 10% came at 304. My second will be 274, and I am within 10 lbs. of it now! Now, for some fun with numbers (I really am a number crunching fool at heart!), my third 10% is 247, fourth 222, and fifth is a nice, even 200! One more after that, and I will have reached my major goal of 180. Broken down into manageable chunks it doesn't seem so bad. :)

I've got to go. This should have been posted quite a while ago, but my best girlfriend just called up, and we had some serious catching up to do!

Take care!


P.S. Lucky! Just saw your post :) You know, I'd love the answer to that wrinkle question as well. And 90 minutes of exercise? I certainly hope they just mean 90 minutes of generally active lifestyle, cause 90 minutes of aerobics or something would probably kill me! :lol: BTW, the welcome picture was really cool! Have a good evening with your dad. :wave:

01-12-2005, 08:25 PM
Well Hello Beautiful People!

It is wonderful to see all of you. I've missed you all. Right now I am on my laptop and it is slow. And do you know what it is doing outside. It is thunderstorming outside. In the middle of January, we just had a snow storm and now there is lighting and thunder and rain outside. What a wacky state I live in. Well, Lucky, you are in a wacky state too. How bout those Packers hey? I told ya that they would lose, how great is that. People are upset about that whole mooning thing, but I thought it was funny.
I am glad that Andria started this thread. I believe that this will be a more positive and open place to post. I have come to care for many people here and know that they are very trusting and supportive individuals.
I am not completely moved into my house yet but I am planning on being in there by tuesday.
Hello to Laura and Kiteen. I am sure you will enjoy it here with these lovely people. To tell you about myself I am 36, married to a great man, and I am at 318 pounds. I am using the Dr. Phil/my doctor method of losing weight. So I know that I will be a different person by the time I go home for Christmas again this year. Because of the move and illness my year is going to start feb 1st. It just seems like it will be easier for me to focus on journaling and menu planning and exercise logging.
Speaking of exercise, I have discoved that I am afraid to exercise, and Tony maybe you can ease my worries on this one. I am afraid if I start exercising that I am so fat I will have a heart attack or stroke. Is that a strange fear to have? I know that I need to exercise to get healthy but I am just scared. I watched a little bit of that Biggest Loser, and watching those people I thought I would just pass out and die. But can we push ourselves in our conditions?
Anyway, dinner is ready and I need to do some packing and Lost is on tonight. I am so glad this is here now.
Love ya all

01-12-2005, 09:54 PM
Swinging by real fast to answer a couple of questions posted to me :)

Lucky: Remodelling is just like any other repair system in the body; the cells try to do what they feel will be the best adaptation possible. For instance, when you get a deep, open gash, and it isn't stitched together, your body heals by creating a huge collagen scar. While it looks unsightly, it makes sense on a repair level...that part of your skin isn't ever ripping open again :)

And you're right, age plays a role in it as well. Like all repair systems, this also slows down with age. As a side note, wrinkles are a problem for people losing weight, because the main cause of wrinkles is the loss of subcutaneous fat that helps "plump" out the skin. While this normally occurs with age, you can also see how being on a weight-loss plan can cause the arrival of wrinkles. Just remember, your health is more important than that; my thought is that if you are healthy and have a few wrinkles or sagging skin, you can get cosmetic surgery to get rid of all that. Your health, however, is what needs to be fought tooth-and-nail for :)

Skittles: Good to see you! And the short answer to your question is: No, as long as you don't overdrive yourself when your body is telling you to stop, exercise should be perfectly safe. That being said, there is always the _chance_ of some freak occurrence happening; however, the benefits far, far, (did I mention far?) outweigh the risks. Furthermore, the more fit you become, the lesser these risks are. Now, to address your specific concerns:

Heart attack or stroke: Highly unlikely. Most heart attacks are due to a sudden blockage in a coronary artery, usually by a blood clot formed somewhere else in the body. Strokes are the same way, except now, it's with an artery that goes to the brain. The entire deal with fatty plaques in atherosclerosis is that a) they narrow the vessel, which makes it much easier to clog up (think about clogging your sink with hair vs. clogging your toilet with hair), and b) these can rupture, exposing the underlying tissue to the blood. The body is a marvelous system; it's designed to know that if the underlying tissue is exposed to blood, there must be a rupture somewhere, and it should start its clotting cascade. Unfortunately, these small clots will go and jam themselves into critical spaces, like already narrowed vessels for the brain or heart, and yield the dreaded stroke or heart attack.

But see, none of this really affects exercise. In fact, you can argue that exercise will help prevent this; stagnant blood clots much easier than freely moving blood. To clot, the body basically weaves a meshwork of protein together, capturing red blood cells in processes, and plugging up whatever the trauma is. Imagine weaving outdoors in a nice, calm spring imagine weaving in the middle of a hurricane. The latter doesn't work too well, does it? :)

All that being said, it is important not to overdrive yourself. If you start getting chest pain on exercise, this is what is called effort, or classical angina. There are medications specifically indicated for this, so that you can exercise in comfort. Likewise, if you have an issue with high blood pressure, make sure your blood pressure is well controlled when you start your exercise regime.

01-12-2005, 10:04 PM
Hey Gang!
How is everyone this evening. I have so much I want to write, but I don't have a lot of time so I will do my best. I am sitting here in my personal sanctuary. It was so neat to hear that I had a part in inspiring the title of our group. :D Just a little background for those that don't know....with the incredible stress of undergoing IVF right now I decided that I had to make a peaceful place in my house. I turned a spare room into what is called "Barb's Positive Place". There is even a sign on the door that says, " not disturb...Peaceful and Positive thoughts in progress...No boys or dogs allowed". The key parts of this room are a CD player for meditation music, dim light so that I can see to write in my journal, which is a part of my nightly ritual, nice ocean breeze candle and a water fountain - which is a new addition given to me by a dear friend. Each night I come in here to be alone with my thoughts, journal, think, type messages (thank goodness for a laptop and wireless internet). This room has been such a blessing. My DH has no clue what goes on in here - he doesn't get it, but he respects that I need it! :) I have always heard how important it is to find time for yourself each day, but I never did it until recently.

I also started back to acupuncture today. Some of you may know I went last year for about 5 months and then stopped while we were on an IVF break. I started with a new Dr. today. He isn't quite as warm as the last person I saw and the atmosphere in the office isn't quite as comfortable - it's a little on the "medical" feeling side oppossed to relaxed, serene side. But, that's all ok - because I still felt wonderful after the session and I didn't have a headache today --- first time in 4 days!!!! His appt times and price work better for me so I am going to see him 2x a week for the next 3-4 weeks. I never thought I could enjoy "have needles poked in me", but now I realize it's so much more.

Sadly I have not been on my scale since about a week before Christmas. I typically weigh myself on Friday mornings. I just haven't had the courage to face it lately. I've still been eating well and exercising, just not doing either to the best of my ability, but juggling them fairly well for now.

Anyway, enough about me for the moment....

Andria - I am so relieved that you and your home are safe. I saw the devastating coverage on the news. The devasation going on around the world is unbelievable lately! The restaurant review sounds like a lot of fun --- I know you will do a fabulous job!!!

Kiteen - I followed the Nutri-System plan about a million years ago. Actually it was 1988 and I was a freshman in college. My parents pretty much forced me into it and I did well initially losing 40 pounds. However, after time I got physically sick at the thought of preparing another pre-packaged meal. Not to mention it was rather difficult to follow a plan like that in college. I am sure the program has changed much over the years. I hope it works out well for you! I echo Tony's sentiment.... I don't believe there is a right or wrong --- just what works for you! Great job on the additional pound gone! Every stinkin little pound counts! :D

Laura - Hello and Welcome to the group! This is gonna be your year!!! :) Little Debbies --- oh, the strawberry roll things are to die for. How do you do it?

Kat - You ROCK chickie! Great job on the exercise and food! Keep it up!

Lucky - You ready for the Eagles to kick some Viking butt this weekend??? :p

Tony - Great job on the weight loss front!!! WooHoo!!!! I do use two windows when I am writing --- one for replies and then I toggle back and forth to make sure I'm not missing anything!

Skittles - Hey girlie! Great to see you! Exercise is not going to kill you. :lol: If you need to start with 5 minutes a day and before you know it you'll be going non-stop. When I first resumed working out in 2/03 that is what I did - got a treadmill, started at 5-10 minutes and worked my way up to 45 min or so. Then eventually joined the gym and started doing more and more! You can do it my friend!! I have all the faith in the world in you!

Ack --- I hope I didn't miss anyone. I am going to sign off now, write in my journal and try out a guided meditation CD I got today.

Have a Peaceful and Positive Night!!!!

01-12-2005, 10:34 PM
WOW, great to see all my buddies posting.

BUT now (after reading Barb's post) I feel like some relaxing, peaceful time before bed.

It is suppose to be 20 below with 40 below wind chill tomorrow and then 20 below wind chill until Monday afternoon. I figure I will be here posting A LOT this weekend.

Well, except for when the Vikings kick the Eagles butt. You had it backwards, Barb.

No one here cared about the mooning, Skit - we were WINNING!!!!

Okay all you Eagles, buds...NO MORE football talk. I don't want to have to feel bad OR gloat Sunday night!!!!

I will respond tomorrow.

Tony, it is great to have your medical advice. Because of my age I worried about exercise too, but if I haven't done it in awhile (which WON'T be happening anymore) I just go slow and build up. I trust my body and listen to it. So far, so good. :lol:

southern gal
01-12-2005, 11:27 PM
Hello everyone!
Thanks to all of you for making me feel so welcome. I am having such a wonderful time reading these posts! Everyone is so positive and that is just what I need to hear in my "sanctuary". My husband and kids don't have my weight problems (thank heavens) so they try to be supportive but really don't have a clue what I'm going through.

Thanks for the answers to so many of my own questions! I've worried about the sagging skin thing (think old sagging skin!) and the possibliity of a heart attack while exercising. It is nice to hear that the odds are against it! I am borderline on high blood pressure but it seems to stay under as long as I walk/exercise. That is another health issue that I'm concerned about and just one more reason to lose this weight and keep it off this time.

If possible, could someone who knows the regulars that post on this thread make a list of everyone, with occupations or something to help me keep everyone straight? I really want to get to know everyone so that I can be supportive! I'd appreciate it!

I've still got some school work to finish up (started late working on it because of choir practice tonight) so I guess I better go. Hope everyone has a great day tomorrow with lots of positive food choices, plenty of water, and some fun exercise!


01-12-2005, 11:54 PM
BUSY, BUSY, BUSY!!! I love it!

I wish I had more time to post but I'm on my way to work, and haven't even done my hair yet!

SKITTLES!!!! Welcome to our cozy little place! So glad to have you join us!

Welcome to you too, Laura! I love the dog in your avatar, is it yours?

Kiteen, keep taking those drops in the ocean! They do add up!

Barb, Andria, Tony, Lucky...:wave:

I really have to run...dammit! I want to stay and play! "See" you all tomorrow!

01-13-2005, 08:39 AM
Good morning everyone! I have no idea what I am doing awake so early in the morning but nonetheless here I am! I was out rather late last night to boot, I should still be sawing logs LOL! :lol:
I went out with a girlfriend last night and had dinner out and listenened to a band we know and love. I had a salad with dressing on the side and diet soda. I only ate half of the salad, it was good but I have learned now instead of eating whatever is on my plate to instead just eat until I get signals from my stomach that I am full. I grew up being taught "now clean your plate" and was even made to stay at the table until I did so. Argh....I am so glad that I didn't raise my son that way. :o
I hope and pray that those of you being ravaged by bad weather remain safe, snug, and untouched by the tempest. Here in FL we will be getting colder weather in a day or two as a result of the storm pushing south. Here's to another day, and another small success. I am down another 1.5 lbs.

{{{Hugs}}} to all!

01-13-2005, 10:02 AM
Good Morning!
I don't have time to stay and play either, but I wanted to pop in for a second.

Kiteen - where in FL are you? I grew up in the Ft. Walton Beach/Pensacola area. My family is all still there.

Make it a great day!
:) Barb

01-13-2005, 10:08 AM Gang!!!

I love your new home, but you are still missed at the old one! I'm glad everyone is doing good. I have been doing super good in the Weight Loss area. We started a new "PLAN" the first of the year, and so far it's working really well, and fairly easy to stay on. It's the Dr Perricone's Prescription plan. It's a total "living" plan saying that weight loss and Skin Care, and Energy, and Mood all come from the fuel you use, or the food you eat. It has a lot of fish, specifically salmon (which I love) salads, whole grains, etc. It also has supplements and exercise tips, and I even bought the JOURNAL to use (and you all know how I hate journals) The journal has places for you to record you thought about your body, skin, mood, exercise etc. But the first thing it has is to like 3 things you appreciate during the day, and it also has a section to record your thoughts, meditation, or prayers. I'm trying to write in it every night.

It must be working,cause so far I've lost 9 pounds!

Well, I've gotta go, but I'll be checking in on you daily and posting when I have something to say

01-13-2005, 11:35 AM
Good morning! :)

I just barely have time to read this morning before running out the door to physical therapy. I'm heading into my next four days of night work, so you won't see quite as much of me for a few. Ok, maybe you will, just depends on how well I am sleeping or not! :lol:

I kept OP yesterday! My WI is today, and I'm feeling like the news should be to the positive. I've worked my food plan as well as my exercise and journaling very consistently this last week.

Time to run! Good seeing so many of you here!


01-13-2005, 01:29 PM
BarbG!!! Hey, so good to 'see' you! Thanks for popping in, I sure hope you make a habit of it! :) Your plan sounds FABULOUS! And you are doing so well! 9 lbs...I'm in awe! How did you find out about this plan? I've never heard of it, and I thought I'd heard 'em all! *Naturally, I just had to pop over to his website...which looks very interesting--I just earmarked it for future reading. Lucky, you may be interested in the "Three Day Nutritional Face Lift" I found at his website. BECAUSE OF YOUR SKIN QUESTION, not because there are any wrinkles on your cute little face!*

Hey, BarbG...I'm going to steal the idea from your plan and list three things that I appreciate today...

1. Our Sanctuary, which includes all of you!
2. The positive vibe here which really encourages me to do well.
3. FREE MEDICAL ADVICE FROM TONY!! :cp: woo hoo! :lol:

Anyone else want to make a list? Hmmm?

Kiteen...Another 1.5#? Excuse me, that's a few more drops in that ocean! Atta girl!

Laura...The 'regulars' here are pretty much who you see! We branched off from another thread and only just started this a few days you came in on the ground floor...which means you're a regular too! If you have any questions, just ask! You know, we have something in common...I have one of those 13 year old boys with the strange sense of humor too! Interesting age, isn't it?

Andria...That is so cool about writing restaurant reviews! :T My kind of job! Details, we want details! Also, what did you end up writing about for the opinion piece? New kids: Andria is our resident writer, if you haven't guessed by now. :write:

Tony...Very descriptive view of heart attack/stroke! A lot of people don't realize what actually happens. I loved the weaving analogy!

Lucky...Not to rub it in or anything...but, it's supposed to be 60 degrees here today!!! Just a freaky weather glitch though, it will be down in the 20s over the weekend. Although, that's probably sweater weather for you! Good thing the Eagles have that home field advantage!

BarbPa...I know you'll be watching that game too! My dh is SO psyched that he's off for the game...

Skittles...You like Lost too? I haven't seen all of the episodes, but dh and my daughter are hooked, so I'm fairly up to speed on what's happening. Great show! Lotsa cute fellers! ;)

All right, I have frittered away most of the morning on this post! Well, maybe I didn't actually fritter it away, I was semi-productive while I tried to type: I answered the phone a few times...let the dog out/in...fed said creature...threw dinner in the crock pot...tidied a little...thought about tidying a LOT...but didn' the mail...didn't open it...put it on the coffee table with yesterday's unopened, that's about it. I really have to sleep. One more night to work and I'm off for three. :cp: Oh yeah.

I'd better get a nap in. We have Karate and a basketball game tonight, again. During my regularly scheduled sleep time! *sigh* I gotta get off the night shift!

See ya!

01-13-2005, 04:31 PM
Hi all,:wave:

I am on my lunch break and thought I would catch up real quick since it might take a while to do it at home. :lol: I will be so glad when I am completely moved into the other house.

Andria, I send :angel: your way to keep you safe. I hope you enjoy the review. Tell us what you eat. :eating2:

Tony, :thanks: thanks for the info. I am ok with the blood pressure so that should be no problem I'm just a worry wart. :stress:

Laura & Kiteen, you will love these people here, they are all wonderful. :grouphug: Except for the football teams they root for,;) but I still love them despite that fact. :lol:

BarbPA, You have inspired me to create a sanctuary in my new home. :) I think it will be on my sun porch, :cool: but I will still have candles and fountains and such. Thanks for the idea.

Kat, We had thunderstorms :rain: last night and it snowed this morning. :sman: Now we are going to get in to the single digits and below. Brrr! I wish I had your weather right now. :p And I love Lost, yes there are some very good looking men on there. :o But the whole concept of the show has got my mind wandering. It is so cool.

Lucky, Baby it's cold outside. I'll be rooting for your Vikings. That is how much I can't stand the Packers. :lol:

Well Lunch is over, gotta go, I'll check in later.


01-13-2005, 08:22 PM
Hello Gang!
Whew - So happy to be at home. Today started out great. I felt wonderful most of the morning, spent all day with a co-worker catching up on some things. Then around 2pm my head started to pound and still is. Nothing will get rid of it - next stop is "Barb's Positive Place" for some meditation to see if that helps. Last night I started doing a new guided meditation CD and was just getting into it when my little chihuahua decided to start jumping against the door - that pretty much did in the quiet time. :^:

Tomorrow is another acupuncture appt and I am looking forward to it! The worst part are the needles in my big belly - a little embarrasing, but I guess it's good for me. :o

Wow, I am completely babbling. My thoughts are all over the place! Maybe I should be cut off from the computer for the night. :smug:

Barb.g - Great to see you popping over to visit us! You are are really getting the new year off to a bang!! KEEP IT UP! :strong:

Skitt - I am so happy to hear that I've helped inspire you to make your own little place at home! I think you'll love it! :D

Andria - Don't work too hard! :dizzy:

Kat, Lucky, Tony, Kiteen, Laura --- I hope you are all having a super-dooper day!!!

Talk to you all later!

;) Barb

01-13-2005, 08:32 PM
Well, I am behind here I can see.

I will have to catch up tomorrow - it's 26 below with 40 to 50 below wind chill - it is exhausting to deal with. I feel I could drop and it's only 6:30PM.

Lost - I liked it when I watched it but forgot about it - thanks for the reminder.

I am wearing long johns and sweats to work tomorrow!!!! I HATE being cold not to mention what it does to my fibro body!!!

Kiteen and BarbG on the weight loss. I am going to follow your examples!!!

Reminds me of HOT WARMTH!!!!!

01-13-2005, 09:37 PM
Hey everyone :)

My WI was good! 1.5 lbs. down. :D Go ME!

Kiteen, another 1.5?! Wow! You are sprinting down the path! :)

BarbG, Hello! Good to see you! I am going to have to read up on your plan. 9 lbs. is so awesome! I also loved the idea of writing out 3 things you appreciate each day. I'm going to incorporate that into my own journaling. :)

Laura, we really do need to figure out a way to post simple Bios. Thanks for bringing that up! :)

Anyone have ideas on that?

Skittles, so happy to see my fellow faerie chick! :) On the exercise front, I would highly recommend starting with something gentle that you can work up. Curves or water aerobics come first to my mind. Plus, with either of those, you get to see some really speedy results in inch loss. :)

Kat, you would have to ask about the opinion piece... :o I started about half a dozen times, and after staring at a blank screen for what seemed like forever, I walked away! The plan is to finish it up tonight while I'm at work. Not like I'll be doing much else besides watching movies and crocheting until morning.

Lucky, that sounds way too cold! You need to come vacation in my part of the world during the winter, and I'll come visit up there this summer when I'm dying of the heat. :)

BarbPA, I've always wondered about acupuncture, how it feels, how it works, etc. I'm glad it is helping with your headaches. :) And I don't think any of us want to put pressure on to weigh in. Yes, this is a weight loss support board, but sometimes that can't be your first priority. Part of Sanctuary should be a safe place to be until you are ready or able to move forward again. :)

Tony, Yes, I'm getting to bed right now!

Take care, everyone! :wave:


01-14-2005, 10:19 AM
Hi kids! Very quick pop in post here...I'M OFF!! I just need a wee nap this morning, then lots to do the rest of the day and the weekend!

Our weather is ATROCIOUS! Scarily windy...and raining like it's monsoon season! I had to chase the garbage can down the street earlier! And pull the Christmas tree out of the gutter, so as not to cause a flood from the backed up water...muttering, when the heck are the recycling peeps going to pick this thing up? Bleccch. I was soaked when I finally got in the house. The temp is supposed to plummet tonight to low 20s. Oh, great, just what we!

Gotta hit the rack...back later!

01-14-2005, 03:12 PM
This is kind of long. I did not write it, but I love it. For me certain resolutions do go along with my weight loss process. I will be hanging this in my sanctuary at home. Which by the way I will be moved into by Tuesday if it kills me. :lol: And boy is it friggen freezen outside.:lol:
Be back later,


Did I express love this year, real love? The kind of
love that doesn't announce itself in flashy
circumstances or structured conditions - but an
authentic, quiet, internal love? The kind of love
that bubbles to the surface when I gaze at another
with understanding, a love that places me in their
shoes, granting freedom from judgment and deepening my
compassion? A philanthropic love that expresses
because it simply feels compelled to, because it knows
there is more than enough and everyone can benefit.
If not, then I resolve to be and do better in my
authentic loving.

Did I forgive this year, really forgive? The kind of
forgiveness that cracks open my heart, peeling away
one more layer of righteous indignation, thus allowing
my soul to breathe? The kind of forgiveness that
loosens my clinched fists held high at a situation so
that I don't enter into the next one with guarded
mistrust? The kind of forgiveness that comprehends
there is a difference between understanding a
behavioral choice and condoning it? If not, then I
resolve to be and do better in my forgiving.

Did I stop this year, really stop? The kind of
stopping that can't help but make me vulnerable by
becoming more familiar with who I am without
distraction, smoke screens, excuses or self-imposed
numbing? The kind of stopping that turns me, naked,
towards my feelings, giving them permission to
express? No right or wrong - a stopping that simply
lets me hear what I need to hear so that I can live
more effectively? If not, then I resolve to be and do
better in allowing myself to stop.

Did I seek adventure this year, real adventure? The
kind of adventure that requires me to not only take a
leap of faith off my cliff of familiarity but actually
sends me back to get a running start? The kind of
adventure that shakes the dust off my capable but
underused wings and gives them an opportunity to catch
the gorgeous wind of change? The kind of adventure
that knows there is no outside safety net in this
physical world, only an internal one? The kind of
adventure that shouts, "I choose to live fully!" If
not, then I resolve to be and do better in seeking

Did I seek wellness this year, real wellness? The
kind of wellness that requires me to be fully
conscious of what I put in my body - the kind of
wellness that requires me to practice what I preach
when it comes to self-love while understanding that
the power to dissolve poor habits starts by simply
choosing to change? Wellness that says, "This is the
only body you've got. Treat me with respect, praise me
daily and honor me as the holy temple that I am?" If
not, then I resolve to be and do better in allowing
wellness in my life.

Did I play this year, really play? The kind of play
that gives value to the heavenly activity of fun -
knowing that fun is sacred, that play is the
equivalent of work and that during play - renewal and
relaxation usher in the newest ideas and the clearest
choices for better manifestations? Did I view play as
a necessary life function and not a debatable luxury?
If not, then I resolve to be and do better in my
relationship to playing.

Did I set a goal and see it to completion this year,
really complete it? The kind of completion that lets
the vibration of satisfaction and confidence in my
abilities heal any opposing ideas of not being good
enough? Did I honor my life and its sacred purpose by
utilizing my time with forward thinking and letting my
mistakes be motivators not antagonists? Did I dissolve
my insecurities and procrastination by understanding
that my untapped genius has but one mode of expression
and that is through idea, thought, word and action?
If not, then I resolve to be and do better in setting
and completing my goals.

Did I open myself up to learn this year, really
learn? The kind of learning that entices me to enroll
in being a student of life with thirst and enthusiasm?
Did I set an intention for uncovering more of my
potential, letting divine intellect eat from my plate
and stepping deeper into the waters of wisdom? Did I
open a book, take a class, study a language, learn an
instrument, write a poem, visit another culture? Did
I learn to surprise and thrill myself with the
infinite capacity I have to master more than I thought
I could? If not, then I resolve to be and do better
on my personal path of learning.

Did I clean up my relationships this year, really
clean them up? The kind of cleaning that requires me
to break open the lock, pull back the curtain, throw
open the window and start removing the dust of harsh
words, grudges, false accusations and misguided
choices that have layered my heart? Did I make amends
for the fearful ways that disheartened another, for
neglecting to honor their point of view? With careful
examination, did I communicate my truth, understanding
that sometimes all we may be able to do is agree to
disagree and to do so without judgement or malice? If
not, then I resolve to be and do better on cleaning up
my relationships.

Did I share my good this year, really share? The
kind of sharing that comes from the pure joy of seeing
another succeed, not from what I think they can or
will do for me in return? Did I tithe back to where I
was spiritually fed, transformed and inspired? Did I
practice random acts of kindness and give of my time,
talent, and treasure realizing that my good is a part
of a never-ending wellspring that cannot run dry -
whose source is and always will be the infinite
wellspring of the Divine? Did I commit to walking the
altruistic path, remembering that every step brings
healing and enlightenment to the world? If not, then
I resolve to be and do better in my sharing.

Did I pray this year, really pray? The kind of
prayer that is spoken not to God but AS God - prayers
that affirm rather than beseech, are pregnant with
knowing rather than bloated with doubt? Did I make my
every day activities a prayer - realizing that every
thought I think carries with it the responsibility of
an effect on the world? Did I remember how truly
powerful my own prayer actually is and that by simply
devoting myself to the practice of it, I become the
change? Did I remember that my prayer takes what I
seek and introduces it to me, the seeker? If not,
then I resolve to be and do better with praying.

Did I do all these things because deep down inside I
fully understand how precious I am and that these
activities will help me to see that I am held in the
light as a perfect idea? Did I remember that I have
been perfectly conceived and am always held in the
perfect mind of God as perfect being? Did I know that
there is nothing that I can ever say, nothing I can
ever do that will separate me from the love of God?
If for any reason, I forgot my divinity this year,
then I resolve to be and do better in my knowing of
it, to fully understand and embody the truth that it
is done unto me as I believe. And I believe in the
power of Good, for me, for you, for all.

(c)2004 Rev. David Ault

southern gal
01-14-2005, 11:54 PM
Evening everyone!
How do you manage to post in the morning?!!! Between getting the kids off to school, doing my walking, and getting myself to work (usually right at the wire, I might add!), I can just imagine what would happen if I turned on my computer! Things are so hectic that time of day...

I've really been doing well. I'm down 7 lbs. so far - and finally feel like I'm changing my lifestyle, not dieting. I have lost weight on every diet I've ever been own but have never really managed to keep it off for long. I can't go through that again so I'm working on totally changing my mindset this time around. I've worked out a way of eating that I can live with and am just concentrating on getting healthier. I know for me, the key is to exercise so I'm getting that in no matter what!

Kat-Yes, the dog in the avatar is Hershey, queen of the house. Her every whim is catered to by the entire family...13 year olds are interesting, aren't they? Mine is a really cool kid and keeps me entertained. Unfornunately, that sense of humor of his has had me laughing outloud at highly inappropriate times! I hope yours is not as bad!

Kiteen-I can relate to the "clean your plate" thing. It is a very hard habit to break when you've been brought up like that. I'm like you, I'm just glad I didn't do that to my own kids. Congrats on the weight loss! Way to go!

Barb-9 lbs. Wow!!! Your program sounds like it is really working for you. I like the part about writing down 3 things you appreciate every day...We need to remember all our blessings!

Andria-Good for you! Isn't it nice to see the scales move in the right direction?!!! Great job!

Lucky-Your neck of the woods is way to cold for this Southern Gal. It hits 32 here and we think it is too cold to go out...

Skittles-I love "New Year Resolutions". It makes you think doesn't it?

Well, one of my teenagers is breathing down my neck wanting to IM his friends so I'll say goodnight. Hope everyone has a great weekend!


01-15-2005, 12:04 AM

I was going to post that I must be the only one without a life, nothing better to do on a Friday night, but then Laura finally posted.

Laura, I agree, exercise is the key! My health club has just set up a '30 minute workout' area to "compete" with all the Curves craze. They've got the machines and the directions on how to use them and to do aerobics between. If I get a chance I might try to get by there tomorrow and try it out. I ususally don't go on Saturday, but I have a SjS meeting at the hospital, and my club is owned/runned by the hospital, and only a couple of blocks away, so I may try to get by there. I'll let y ou know how it goes.

01-15-2005, 07:17 AM
Barb, Your picture is a much needed breath of Spring! So pretty! I'm already planning what I'm going to plant this year, some of them (the flowers in your picture, whatever they are) would look lovely in a window box! I've had enough of Winter and we're barely a month into it! We haven't even had any snow yet. Not worried about that though! I'm fairly certain that we've taken care of any snow accumulation this year by purchasing a snow blower this past summer! Just like when we bought our 4WD after a particularly bad winter...we had about 6 years of no snow!!

Laura, sounds like you have the right approach to weight loss...I'm working on totally changing my mindset this time around. I've worked out a way of eating that I can live with and am just concentrating on getting healthier. I know for me, the key is to exercise so I'm getting that in no matter what! To me, the key is ABSOLUTELY exercise, especially the older I get...the weight just does not come off as quickly as it once did.

Re: My 13 year old...oh, he's a character! He's rather quiet, but has a very dry sense of humor that takes me by surprise quite frequently!

We have a 'queen of the house' too...Molly, our chocolate Lab. She's really got the life, that one!

As for posting in the morning...that's easy! Just work nights and come post after work, getting the kid off to school and getting a cup of tea! And then try to not fall asleep at the keyboard! right, Andria?

Skittles...That piece was so thought provoking and inspiring, thank you for sharing it! Not too long at all, when the words contained are so meaningful. Something else that I will be printing out and keeping handy.

I came across this verse on the 'Buddhist Support' thread and was really struck by the simplicity of the words, but the powerful meaning behind them. Really hit home for me...

The thought manifests as the word;
The word manifests as the deed;
The deed develops into habit;
And habit hardens into character.
So watch the thought and its way with care,
And let it spring from love
Born out of concern for all beings.

Having spent most of my life thinking that I was fat, even when I wasn't, is a great illustration of thought/word/deed/habit/character. I really need to change my way of thinking...I'm working on it, I'm working on it!

Hi, Andria, Barb, Kiteen, Lucky, Tony...I'd do more replies, but I haven't had coffee yet and my brain will not allow me to process another thing until it's been caffeinated! Plus the fact that I got up this early so that I could be working on the invitations to my parent's 50th anniversary. I swore that I would do them last night, fell asleep and got up bright and early so that I could get a jumpstart on them...:o whoops! Had to check in here first...and then I sort of get carried away. So....

see you all later, Have a great day!

01-15-2005, 08:30 AM
Greetings Fellow Chicks!
I just woke up a few moments ago and couldn't wait to come and weigh seems silly but I get so excited when I see the numbers move down on the scale I can't wait for it to happen!
I am still enjoying my NutriSystem foods but not really eating everything they give you on the program. I started out eating everything the way they tell you to eat and I felt like I had too much food and wasn't losing weight. I think my metabolism is so low that a diet that would allow other people to lose weight just keeps me maintained.
I ordered a Pilates machine from QVC last night and can't wait to get started with weight training! I think that is the "missing link" in my program that would fire up my metabolism by building more muscle. I do about 30 minutes of cardio each day and with the addition of strength training I hope to see better results.
Also the exercise helps with the sagging skin issue and I want to make sure that is not problematic as I go along losing more pounds.
I hope everyone has a delightful weekend and finds those numbers dropping on the scale! Hey I bought a new outfit last night and found that I actually went down an entire size already! I used to wear 24W and now can wear a 22W! Small progress but steady, that's the best way, and I am on my way now back down to the 7/8 I used to be!
I even purchased a size 15/16 trendy short skirt suit to keep here near my work station at home to be a motivation to lose! I will need a 34" waist in order to wear the skirt and so that is my next goal! I have over ten inches on the waist to lose to reach that but every day gets better.
Thank goodness for folks like you all to share these things with and enjoy the goodwill of doing so.

{{{Hugs}}} to all my sanctuary friends!


01-15-2005, 09:30 AM
Morning all,

Laura, I don't have children so I am not as rushed as others are in the morning. So I have the opportunity to post if I get my butt out of bed.:D I am also a southern girl myself. I'm from Alabama, but I don't like the heat so now I live in Wisconsin, and well, it is a little bit colder than I like.:o I don't have a queen of the house right now but I plan on getting one as soon as we are settled in the new house. I do have two divas (my cats) and two very sweet rats.

Kat, I really liked the quote you put, I am going to put that by my desk at work, because it is a very negative place. I totally believe that is true too. Not knowing who my real parents are and having a feeling who my biological father is, I have found that I wanted to belong to someone so much that I started being like him in many ways, including the weight. I feel that my gaining weight made me feel like I belonged to him. A very weird psychological mess going on in my head. Then add the fact that I am Gemini, oh boy am I a mess.:lol:

Kiteen, way to go on losing a size. That is great. I think having the smaller skirt is a great motivator as well. Keep up the good work and positive attitude.

BarbG, Love the flowers, very warming. You always have the greatest pics. It is nice to see you here.

Andria, I hope you are well, I see all of these pictures from Utah, I hope all is well with you and that you are safe.

Well I am off, I have a lot of work to do today. Got to get things finished up for the move and I have to go set up my rats new home at the house and organize some items. Take care all, Keep up the good work.


01-15-2005, 02:23 PM
Saturday's exercise regime, so far, consists of: vacuuming and dusting the living room, sweeping/mopping kitchen floor, scrubbing the bathroom...not to mention a bit of laundry on the side.

...puff puff...

southern gal
01-15-2005, 10:09 PM
Hi all!
This has been a lazy Saturday for me (bliss!). I slept late, read a good part of the day, and thoroughly enjoyed myself. :D I did get in my walking, but not until 1:00. This was one of the few days that no one had to be chauffered anywhere and other than housework (which I pretty much ignored) there was nothing that absolutely had to be taken care of. What a wonderful day!

BarbG-Aren't you lucky to have a health club so close to work. Hope the new machines worked out well! I usually walk 2 miles (in the dark and by myself) at 6:00 a.m. while the boys are getting ready for school. They catch the bus at 6:55 so it gives me enough time and I find that I do better getting the exercise in early. Although not being a morning person, I have to drag myself out the door... :dizzy:

kat-Isn't it amazing how dogs can rule the house? Mine had to be clipped today, not a job I enjoy but she certainly looked better when I got through with her. The boys gave her a bath and she has been piled up in "her" chair ever since. I know what you mean about being tired of winter already. We have had really mild weather but it is still dreary. I have paperwhites blooming on my kitchen table. One of my fellow teachers gave me the bulbs for Christmas and I can't believe how cheerful they make me feel every time I walk by them. I took a picture of them and hung it on my file cabinet at school so I could look at them there as well.

kiteen-I've looked at the NutriSystem program a couple of times and considered it for myself. I eat a lot of packaged food for school lunches (Weight Watchers, Healthy Choice, Lean Cuisine) and find them very convenient. I'm glad it is working for you. Good idea about hanging the cute, small size outfit where you can see it. That should be great motivation!

skittles-Alabama to Wisconsin? That is some major weather contrasts! Hope you get your new rat home set up OK. Are you moving to a house in the same area or somewhere new? When is your move going to be complete? I've managed to loose something or other on every move we have made. I hope you are more organized than I am and that it goes smoother for you!

Andria, Lucky, and Tony-Hope you are having a good weekend!

Guess I better go. It has been a wonderfully lazy day but I'm part of a trio that is singing at church in the morning - I guess I should practice at least a little bit tonight! :eek: Talk to you later...


01-16-2005, 05:53 PM

I am in a major fibro flare in my arms and hands. I haven't been able to post - hurts to type.

THEN I could log in here - said I wasn't a member. Requested a new password and everytime it kept saying my request was over 24 hours old and was no good. THEN it said I was blocked or something - THEN I suddently got an email giving me a new password.

NOW after explaining all that I have to go and rest my hands for awhile.

Did we ever decide on at what point to start the next thread? It seems to be getting S L O W to load on my ancient dial up computer.

Back a little later.


01-16-2005, 06:56 PM
Hey everyone :)

I've been having problems getting onto the 3FC site. :( That combined with my weird work hours hasn't made for much posting the last few days. Anyway, I don't have much time to post right now, but thought I would share the piece I wrote for the paper this month. I'll be back tomorrow to make real replies and get caught up on reading! :)

It feels much longer than 12 months ago when I decided to sit down and make a contract with myself. New Yearís resolutions are nice, but I needed something concrete, something I could refer back to when temptations began to overwhelm me. I wanted a plan with steps to follow to ensure my success, clear goals to meet, and defined rewards for meeting those goals. I had read about making a personal contract, and after a little searching on the internet, I found a template for one that fit my needs.

The amazing thing about setting goals for yourself is that it reminds you of how much control you do have over a few things in your life. Writing out those goals in contract form had an interesting effect on me. The contract not only helped me to realize that control, but the whole concept became binding. For me, that document was more than a piece of paper with a signature; it was more than a promise or a fond hope. In fact, it ultimately felt like a pathway to my salvation.

My personal goal had to do with weight loss. I had recently begun a new diet regimen and met with some success, but was afraid that my desire, or the diet itself, would begin to falter as time wore on. I took all this into consideration when planning out my contract. I looked to the successes of others and to past triumphs of my own, and used those to set the foundation.

With the basic knowledge that there wasnít an obvious medical problem holding me back, I armed myself with language that incorporated exercise, a balanced diet of adequate proportion, plenty of water, and writing a daily food journal.

Specific rewards were set up for reaching milestones, and another promise to celebrate any success, no matter how small. Half of a pound lost would be reason for joy, not disappointment. Each step of the journey would be noted, and each would become a building block for the next step.

It is hard to describe the shift in thinking, but it was dramatic. Maybe the difficulty lies in the fact that it was so dramatic and yet so simple. I really hadnít done anything different than before, but this time it meant something. The contract felt real.

Although weight loss is high on the priority list for New Yearís resolutions every year, other goals, such as reducing your debt load or completing a specific task, can also be incorporated into a contract. The whole idea is to make it fit your needs.

The gist of my contract was to accept any positive change, but the understood hope was that it would translate out to an approximate weight loss of one pound a week for the entire year. I am proud to say that I did meet that goal, right down to the pound.

We have been told that goal setting is the means to reaching our dreams. I would like to encourage all of you to pick a dream of your own and to utilize whatever tools you have available in the realization of that dream.


01-16-2005, 09:22 PM
Hi, everyone. I hope it isn't too late for me to jump into this thread. I love the idea of having a sancutary!

I am 36 years old and stay at home with our three children. Our oldest son is 6 and our youngest son and daughter are 4. I worked until about two years ago when the company began merging and reorganizing. I had been with them since the beginning, 15 years. I had a choice between keeping my job but moving to El Paso to do it or taking a severance package. Without hesitation I took the money and ran. I haven't looked back since.

I am one of those people who has battled weight almost all of my life. The problem is that for the better part of that time the fat was just imagined. Not long ago I came across a journal I kept in college. As I read through it I noticed that almost every entry refereced my weight. At one point I complained that I was 130 lbs and up to a size 10 then scoffed at being the "fatest" I'd ever been. So, here I am now, mid-30's, kicking myself for not having enjoyed what I had while I had it. I honestly believe that if I had appreciated my body for what it was back then I would have cared enough about it not to have hit my highest weight of 214 (I'm only 5ft2in). But here I am. My current weight is about 180 and my goal is 145 to 150. Once I reach that range I'll decide if that is a comfortable place for me or if a few more pounds are warranted. A couple of years ago I got down to about 165 and was getting to the point that I was pleased with my size. I think the reason that I've put 25 of those pounds back on is because I had not accepted that at my height I am not a person who is going to ever be able to stop paying attention to what I eat. 5 or 10 pounds makes a big impact when you are as short as I am. So, now, I am ready to cope with the notion that I am never going to have my 18 year old, pre-pregnancy body back (at least not with as little effort as it came back then) and that my ultimate goal is to be healthy again not skinny again.

I am not following a specific plan to lose weight. I am only counting calories and trying to maintain around a 50%/30%/20% carb, fat, protein ratio. I strive for 1500 calories a day but don't sweat it if I hit 1800 occasionally.
If I make it to my goal weight I have plans to at least have excess skin removed and possibly a tummy tuck. After carrying twins, nothing is where it is supposed to be and there isn't an ounce of elasticity left in my stomach. But, of course, that is a bridge I will cross when I come to it. Who knows, maybe that won't bother me as much as I think it is going to and I can spend all of that money on something even more fabulous!

I look forward to getting to know all of you over the coming days. Thanks in advance for welcoming me in!

01-16-2005, 09:34 PM
STOP Do Not Post Here. Join us at "Sanctuary-- New Thread! Anyone Welcome #2"