Weight Loss Support - Unhealthy Attitude?




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chaoticfish
01-02-2005, 01:18 PM
I'm so dissapointed in myself for my December progress. The thing is that it's actually pretty good considering it was Christmas. Seven pounds and 2.5 inches. But I can't stop beating myself up for the fact that it's the smallest amount since I began this journey 7 months ago. I think I'm getting an unhealthy attitude about the whole thing. If I eat something I "shouldn't" I feel like I've commited a crime. I hate that food is taking over my life and has to be such a huge issue every second. How many calories I've eaten, how many I have left, etc. Has anyone else experienced? Does anyone have any suggestions how I can stop thinking this way and be glad I've lost almost 100 pounds instead of being down on myself because I could have lost more?

Thanks for listening guys.


srmb60
01-02-2005, 01:22 PM
You may find the maintainers board has just what you are looking for. I was happy to find that lots of people had confused feelings about 'what to do next'. Come on over.

laura_on_a_bike
01-02-2005, 01:48 PM
i used to be like this as well. obsessed with my food journal, not letting myself have any relaxed days with food. here is one thing you should focuss on, any progress is good progress. 7 pounds in a month, thats a huge deal. thats a great amount of weight to lose, especially during the holidays.


when i first started losing i felt that food had taken over my live. i still struggle with this attitude today. its very hard because the thought of gaining is so scary to me. but then i realize how far i have come and that i'm not going to just start gaining weight again as long as i keep tabs on it.

its a difficult thing to deal with and i think that people who have never had weight issues don't understand how difficult it is to go from eating all the time and not thinking about it, to being consumed with what you put in your mouth.

you just have to stay positive. your before and current pictures look amazing. if you would like a buddy to keep in touch with about this i will certainly volunteer because i have the same issue all the time.

creating a healthy relationship with food is hard if you have had an unhealthy one for so long. its kind of like going from one extreme to the other.

good luck and congrats on your progress thus far.


almostheaven
01-02-2005, 09:09 PM
If looking at the positive, that you've lost nearly 100 pounds, doesn't keep you from getting depressed about indulging a bit, try looking at the negative points. If you stay depressed, it can hinder your weight loss and maintenance and you can be right back where you started. And you don't want that, right? So if you keep that in mind, maybe that will keep you from allowing a bit of indulgence to upset you. Being upset, depressed or stressed...those are some of the worst contributors to weight gain. So try to remain upbeat and positive so you can keep the weight off. So what if you indulged. You STILL lost 7 pounds. Most people gain this time of year. And as your weight drops, you'll lose it even slower. So you need to work on staying out of depression now so it won't be so rough later.

chaoticfish
01-02-2005, 10:47 PM
Thanks everyone :)

Almostheaven.... I know. The thought of the weightloss slowing down really bothers me. It's been hard enough, as we all know and to have the results be less for more work seems SO unfair! I wish this were easier. Heh, this girl I work with says to me the other day, "I'm glad my metabolism lets me eat whatever I want because I'd never be able to diet. I like eating too much!"

AHHHHHH!

I wonder why some people have to struggle their entire lives just to stay chubby instead of being obese but others can eat whatever they want and be thin.

EveryWoman
01-02-2005, 11:04 PM
I think it's absolutely beautiful that you've lost 100 pounds!!! I think that's very inspirational to a lot of us. Heck, just looking at your photos is inspirational to me!!!

However, plateaus do happen, and the thing to concentrate on is all the hard work and success that you've already had. Don't worry about the plateau. Depression and obsession is a powerful detractor from your success.

There is a wonderful book called "You Count, Calories Don't". It's a non-diet approach to staying optimistic. Although I'm on South Beach I use this book to help me stay focused.

You keep up the phenomenal work! You look wonderful!!!



.

AnneWonders
01-03-2005, 07:51 AM
Hi Chaoticfish,

Congrats on your amazing progress! I am always inspired by your pics. But I also understand how you are feeling completely. It is so easy to beat yourself up for some perceived failure. But try to remember two things: no one ever excutes their weight control plan perfectly, and as I've read recently, good enough is good enough. Seven pounds over holidays sounds pretty good to me! Tell yourself you're doing great, because you are. Eventually you might believe yourself! The second thing is that the tough emotional days pass. Hang in there, and tell yourself it'll get better, because it will. We all have them, but the good days come back around.

One thing to remember, as you get closer to goal, weight comes off more slowly for most people, me included. That's how it is supposed to work. And you know what? You'll still be doing great!

Like SusanB said, come join us on maintainers; we deal with this stuff all the time. And if you haven't done it already, pick up the 2nd ed of Thin for Life for some more tips on how to get through this.

Anne

chubbles
01-03-2005, 07:52 AM
Everyone gets to the point you are at. I cant get past 198. No matter what, I am stuck. I don't count the calories as much as I do the fat because I am really cutting a huge amount of fat out, eating whole grains and fruits....no sodas.The more I count, the more stessed i get so i avoid it all together.

MrsJim
01-03-2005, 02:13 PM
Everyone gets to the point you are at. I cant get past 198. No matter what, I am stuck. I don't count the calories as much as I do the fat because I am really cutting a huge amount of fat out, eating whole grains and fruits....no sodas.The more I count, the more stessed i get so i avoid it all together.

I just read your other posts here at 3FC and I've come to the conclusion that you're putting your body in 'starvation mode' by not eating ENOUGH calories...

i consume about 15 grams of fat a day. I am not starving myself, nor do I go hungry once. I do not binge on empty carbs and empty fats...I eat about one and a half meals a day. IT is all I need. Any more than that, I am full and bloated. I have low blood sugar, so I eat small things through out the day...for instance, I will have two slices of smoked turkey for breakfast. An hour and a half later, a handfull of cereal, and an hour and a half later an orange...by the end of the day, I have consumed about two meals worth. I enjoy fireballs as they keep my mouth busy,......
I do not really count my calories, and never did before when I lost 90 pounds..I eat little and exercize including weight training.....


If you're only eating that much for the WHOLE DAY, AND exercising on top of it - you're REALLY putting your body into starvation mode, as well as setting yourself up for failure - because often when you starve during the day, you're setting yourself up for a huge bingefest at night. Studies have shown again and again that people who consume most of their calories close to bedtime are the ones who tend to be overweight and/or obese. As an high-profile example, Oprah Winfrey has said that a major key to her weight loss success was to stop eating 2-3 hours before bedtime. And actually, I have 'issues' with eating at night myself - I've found the best way to combat the urge to eat at night is to eat well during the day, starting with a healthy breakfast (eggs and oatmeal), lunch (usually something like a chicken salad or a good soup), a couple of snacks such as yogurt, cottage cheese, or fruit. When I get home I have dinner and then THE KITCHEN IS OFFICIALLY CLOSED.

As far as the ultra-low-fat thing...you NEED fat in your diet. Fat is NOT the enemy. I myself went through the "fat free" thing in the mid-90's - when everyone was trying to cut out all fat. I lost weight (not because of cutting fat, but because I also reduced my calories in general) however I also ended up with dry skin, thinning hair, and problems going to the bathroom. NOT fun. Just like your car needs lubrication for all the moving parts to function, your body needs healthy fats included in its diet!

I notice that you said you 'don't really count calories'. The thing is...calories DO count if you want to lose weight. Check out this post that I wrote in July based on an article that appeared in Shape Magazine - "ingest fewer calories" is reported as the most UNDERRATED weight-loss advice (http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=43632).

You might want to check out the Maintainers' Forum (http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=123) for tips and advice - even if you AREN'T at "maintenance level" yet I bet you'll find some valuable advice there...basically what you need to do to lose weight is going to be the same thing you'll have to do to MAINTAIN the loss. It's all about LIFESTYLE CHANGES - not momentary fad diets - to lose the weight AND KEEP IT OFF in a healthy manner. ;)

MrsJim
01-03-2005, 02:30 PM
Oh and to the initial post...

First off, losing weight during the Holiday Feast Season is AWESOME and well worth a big pat on the back! WTG!!!

Now, as far as the amount you're losing per month - as you get smaller, your rate of weight loss is bound to slow down. It HAS to. Your bod can only lose so much fat in a given period of time. If you're losing more than, say, 1-2 lb a week at this point, then you should be concerned about losing lean body weight - stuff like muscle and bone mass that you DON'T want to lose.

I posted a great snippet ages ago about losing weight slowly which was written by science writer Michael Fumento. You can find it at this link (http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showpost.php?p=484700&postcount=9). I think you'll find it very informative!

Meanwhile - you need to FOCUS ON YOUR SUCCESSES. Journaling is a great way to do just that. I myself keep a personal journal the old-fashioned way - in a spiral journalbook with pen and paper. If you'd rather do it the new-fangled way, 3FC has a journal site available at no cost to all members ;) Just make sure to ACCENTUATE THE POSITIVE! Do you still have some of your old fat clothes around? Why not get them out and see how wonderfully LOOSE they are? Climb up some flights of stairs and remember what a struggle it was before you lost almost One Hundred Freaking Pounds. Give yourself some credit for a job well done thus far!!!

KandiceS
01-03-2005, 03:23 PM
chaoticfish- You've already received tons of encouragement from the posters above me, so I don't know if mine would make any difference, but still- I can't believe you're 183! :cheer: you are such a motivation for me!

Mrs. Jim said to dig out some "fat" clothes- I bet you'd feel better in a heartbeat!

do you have a place in your house that you can kinda keep a "weight loss shrine"? mine's my motivation closet that I'm sure you've heard me talk of before. Anyways this past time I weighed/ measured on 12/22, I cut out 44 inches of paper and taped them together for a good visual. It really makes me think of how far I've come. Do you need something like that- would that work for you? I don't know what you could get- maybe rocks or something- I was thinking potatoes but those would go bad... put 100 lbs of *something* in a room that you walk by every day and just be thankful you lost that much on your "off" days when you don't feel so good about yourself. Tell yourself- this is how much came off- I don't want to go back to that ever again! hope it works for you- and again, congrats- keep it up! (did you post pics this month?)