South Beach Diet - Speaking of the big "pause"




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ellis
11-10-2004, 07:48 AM
Changing a Light Bulb with Menopause

Q: How many women with MENOPAUSE does it take to change a light bulb?

A: One! ONLY ONE!!!! And do you know WHY? Because no one else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb! They don't even know that the bulb is BURNED OUT!! They would sit in the dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it out. And, once they figured it out, they wouldn't be able to find the *!@$ light bulbs despite the fact that they've been in the SAME CUPBOARD for the past 17 YEARS!
But if they did, by some miracle of God, actually find them 2 DAYS LATER, the chair they dragged to stand on to change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!!!!! AND UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE WRAPPER THE STUPID LIGHT BULBS CAME IN!!! BECAUSE NO ONE EVER CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!!!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE A FOOT DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE!! IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS DAMNED HOUSE!
I'm sorry.... What was the question?


Bups
11-10-2004, 08:06 AM
:rofl:

Hey I have days like that and I haven't even started to pause yet!

beachgal
11-10-2004, 08:31 AM
:lol3: Oh man, that's so much like my mom before she went on her pills that it's scary! :yikes:

She was a total witch for a week, leaving my dad and my sisters and me completely bewildered. At the end of the week, she had a normal checkup with her doctor, who popped her full of pills and told her she had started menopause. Huge sigh of relief in our house! :lol:


Ruthxxx
11-10-2004, 08:48 AM
"Ah, yes. I remember it well." Anybody remember Chevalier in Gigi?

Bamiegurl
11-10-2004, 11:53 AM
:rofl: :lol3: :lol: That is a hoot! Oh my gosh they must have been to my house! :lol:

SoCalMinew
11-10-2004, 01:21 PM
I feel your pain. :yes:
I did the big M last year, just all at once. I'd like to blame my weight on it, but the truth is, I was already a fat chick. :chicken:

Teri

Mamacita
11-11-2004, 06:20 AM
Ok, I haven't started the Big M yet, but I still go on rants like that. Especially about BIL who still can't seem to take two more steps and put his @#$#@#$@ Diet Coke cans in the TRASH but puts them on the counter NEXT to the can.

Or better still....I found one of his half full coffee cups....on the bathroom floor.... and so help me God....if he leaves the bread unwrapped one more time, I'm just gonna have to kill him.


Mamacita

ellis
11-11-2004, 07:03 AM
DH changed a light bulb the other day. (at my request, mind you) He has bizarre pack-rat tendancies that he inherited from his mother, and I was naturally suspicious after he'd finished the job. Sure enough, I checked the new package of four lightbulbs I'd purchased the previous day, and it was open, but contained four lightbulbs. He'd placed the "dead" bulb back in with the new ones. :lol3:

MarineTubaMom
11-11-2004, 07:19 AM
That was me last week! only it was pms that got me... lol

beachgal
11-11-2004, 09:18 AM
Ellis, :lol3: about DH! I find myself doing that...not because I want to save the bulb, but just because I'm silly and forget what I'm doing! :dizzy:

Mama, maybe your BIL is trying to recycle the cans? ;) If you leave them on the counter, the recycling fairy takes them away. :yes:

Coolmom
11-11-2004, 09:24 AM
Poor bABY!!!!
No I have to say hubby changes the light bulbs and takes out the garbage....BUT---have you ever been cleaning and vacuming and there they sit reading the paper or book or watching tv....as you are cleaning all around them.....UNLESS I SPECIFICALLY ASK to do something.....there he sits!!!!!
I did break one of my favorite blue bowls this morning putting it away.....glass all over the floor....FIRST THING IN THE MORNING>
The rest of the day will be better....cross those fingers and toes!
Coolmom

SoCalMinew
11-11-2004, 03:18 PM
ellis, you have my sympathy concerning your DH. I've got one just like him.

Teri