100 lb. Club - My Cry for Help

View Full Version : My Cry for Help

11-08-2004, 06:41 PM
Hi y'all. I have been struggling with weight my entire life. I start something and then it ends within the first 2 weeks. I am totally lost at what to do. I have had some medical problems, then the doctor puts me on a medication that weight gain is a side affect. Well, she was nice enough to put me on one that it would have the least affect on my weight. I went for a check up 2 weeks later and had gained 5 pounds. It was also Halloween. She had suggested I count calorlies for one week and then subtrack 500 to lose the 1 to 2 pounds a week. Fine, did that and was shocked at that daily amount (3,000 to 3500), but, then again there was candy in the house. I would say about 1,000 of that was candy. I am now at my highest I have ever weighed. I feel just awful, tired, lazy. I am a stay at home grandmother. I watch my granddaughters (1&4). They are active and play outside, but, they are such good kids, I am not always up and after them. I belong to Curves. Haven't been in months. Still have 7 months on my membership. It's just a pain to drive to the other town to it. I am in need of new winter clothes because of this gain. I am so depressed over this whole weight thing. I have read and heard and tried every diet out there. I want to eat what I want and not be told that this or that is a no no. It will be in my house and I need to control what I eat! I just don't know what to do. I know WW, exchanges, and points, and counting calories, by heart. I thought maybe if I try one one week and then another for one week and the third one. I can figure out which one works best for me. My husband and son(23) don't get home from work until 8 and 10 pm. So, I eat dinner alone, and they warm up when they get home.
Well, I have gone on long enough. Thanks for reading and any suggestions would be great.
Thanks again,

11-08-2004, 07:18 PM
Hello Chipper :wave:
Perhaps you don't have to follow a strict diet plan. What about just making what you like to eat healthier - More fruit and veg, leaner grilled meat and fish, low fat sauces, wholemeal pasta, rice and bread, water, occasional treats and more exercise. This method has worked better for me than anything else!!
There are some excellent people round here who have lost loads more weight than me and been doing it for much longer, I'm sure they have great advice for you. Please don't think it's hopeless. You can do it! :yes: :cheer:
Lots of Love Annie xxx

Ivanna B. Skinny
11-08-2004, 08:16 PM
Welcome Chipper!

11-08-2004, 09:03 PM
Welcome to the board! Please jump in and post. :)

11-08-2004, 09:30 PM
Welcome from another grandmother!

I'm going to be blunt and say that it sounds like part of you wants to lose weight, and the other part doesn't want to have to deal with what it's going to take. Sometimes, no matter how much we wish it weren't true, it takes getting the food that got us in this state out of the house. No food should be a no-no, but sometimes we just cannot control ourselves around some foods (for me it's peanut butter).

Regarding exercise, you don't have to go to a gym to exercise. Take the kids for a walk, do a Walk Away the Pounds video or another exercise video, or follow the TV aerobics shows. Or tell yourself that it's really worth it to drive over to Curves because you will feel better and look better. Sometimes it just takes forcing yourself to do it until it becomes a habit.

You CAN do this!! There are some incredible success stories on this board, and you can be one of them.

11-08-2004, 10:31 PM
I totally agree with what Sheila said. I have really been bad myself,.. I think I have gained a few pounds from halloween,..too much candy in the house. There are some foods (like that candy) that just set me off. Pizza rolls drive me nuts,.. if we have those in the house, my healthier eating plan is not safe..lol

Just try to change a few small things at a time. that is what I did,.. and am still doing. In fact, I am starting over in a way,.. I really went off plan a bit with halloween,..

Together, I know we can do this!

11-08-2004, 10:37 PM
Hi Chipper!! Welcome!! I know exactly how you feel!! No advice, Just wanted to say hi!!

11-08-2004, 11:19 PM
chipper, honey ... baby steps. one thing at a time. one positive change, and then stick to it until it becomes a habit - that generally takes a couple weeks or a wee bit longer. and then make another change.

some possibilities: more fruit and veg. more water, less caffeine. more exercise [and i'm NOT suggesting that you think 'i'm going to lift weights 4 times this week' - no. more like 'i'll take the grandkids for a walk around the block twice a day, and park far away from the store when i run errands']. less soda. substitute LF/FF sour cream or yogurt mixed with salsa for whole fat sour cream. whole grains instead of processed grains. fish twice a week instead of never. YOU GET TO PICK!!!!!

sustainable weight management takes time and effort. and a complete change of attitude and lifestyle.

you can do it... just breathe... go ahead. you can do this.

11-08-2004, 11:28 PM
Chipper, I hope we can help you out around here. Welcome!

11-08-2004, 11:35 PM
Welcome Chipper! I agree with everything everyone else has said. The important thing is to think about your health. If you're not comforable changing your whole life at once, make small changes over time. There's no rule that you have to be perfect to lose weight. Just realize that smaller changes may mean it will take longer to see results. Strict calorie counting and vigorous exercize will produce faster results, but not if you're not going to stick to it.

For me, the biggest challenge is snacking throughout the day. My solution is to completely rid the house of unhealthy snacks and replace them with healthy snacks. If there are chips and cookies in the house, there's no way I will choose carrot sticks and apples to snack on. My skinny husband just has to deal with it. If he is DYING for junk food or McDonalds he can get it for himself, but he can't keep it in the house. It is really hard to eat 3500 calories if there are only healthy snacks in the house.

Adding exercise to my life was a bigger adjustment. My suggestion is to take it slow. Go for a walk around your neighborhood. Take the kids to the park and play with them, don't just watch. There is no magic diet. There are simply healthy choices and unhealthy choices.

Good luck!

11-09-2004, 02:38 AM
Welcome Chipper. :)

Eat less and move more. It sounds so easy, doesn't it? Everyone here knows that's not the case and I hope you can glean some insight from all of us here who know what the struggle is all about.

I agree with Jiffy about taking baby steps - anyone who's ever climbed a mountain went over several hills first. I also agree with Sheila - its fine to want to eat what you want, but that's what got us here in the first place. No, its not easy, but if you truly want it badly enough you'll find the strength to do what you must so those children will have a grandma to love for many years to come.

11-09-2004, 08:46 AM
THANK YOU EVERYONE!!!!! From the bottom of my heart. All of what you said is so true. It is just a mind set. I need to sit down and get my mind in order. I need to do that to complete this long and hard task. I do my grocery shopping on Sundays, so next week I will be getting (or replacing) my food with better choices. I already buy, whole wheat pasta. I need to change my bread. Will be figuring out what needs to be changed first, the important first change or which will be the easiest change. You all have given me hope and the information that I needed. I don't need to follow anything (diet) to do this. I just need you!!!!!!!! I will be back.
Here goes:
SW: 268.5
CW: 268.5
mini GW: 245
Final GW:145
Man, that hurt to write that, But, it is what I needed to do.

11-09-2004, 11:32 AM
:coffee: Chipper, you sound like your around my age. My son is 28 and I cook for him before he goes to work. He loves processed food. Nuggets,corn dogs,bacon,that kind of stuff. Will not eat anything green.It's been hard in the past to cook for him and still stay on a diet but for some reason this time it's been easier.I count cals everyday and keep a diet diary. I am doing very well at between 800 and 1000 per day.If I manage to stay well under my amount I get a reward of some kind of goody at the end of the day.I too have health issues,muscular distrophy, which has caused problems with my mobility but leg braces have drasticly improved that. I lose on average 3lbs a week and have lost 40 all together so far.Coming here has been really good for me and I hope it'll do the same for you. Wecome. :wave: :cb: :cheer:

11-09-2004, 02:07 PM
chipper.. i tried to post 3 times this morning, and lost each and every one.

here's what i've been trying to say to you: i'm concerned about that line 'complete this long and hard task.' which task is it? there are many possibilities... like, lose the weight, or lose it and keep it off, or build a healthier lifestyle, make YOU the center of your life so that you can be around for your loved ones... and others [we could make a list!!!!!!]

soooooo... which task? [and remember, i'm a BIG FAN of dividing things up into achievable goals!!!!]

11-09-2004, 04:38 PM
Welcome Chipper!!

It sounds like you have already gotten some GREAT advice here!!!! Just wanted to say welcome!! :D

11-09-2004, 05:22 PM
Welcome Chipper. You've already taken a few baby steps by establishing a starting point, finding a support system, and setting a plan to get healthier eats.
I think sheila said it best

I'm going to be blunt and say that it sounds like part of you wants to lose weight, and the other part doesn't want to have to deal with what it's going to take.

This was me in the beginning and part of it still is when I find I don't want to do what it takes to lose the weight. But I have to remind myself that me and me alone is the only person who can be responsible for me losing weight.

Not losing weight is not an option for me anymore. I know I have to lose the weight if I want to be around with the kiddos in a few years. I want to be able to get down in the floor and play with them or go outside and play ball, run, etc.

I also have a big hang up about No-No foods so I too have no foods that are off limits. I am aware of foods that can cause me to pig out so I do not keep them in the house. That way if it is something I really, really want, I will have to drive to get it.

11-09-2004, 07:11 PM
Ok, Jiffypop, help me make a list. I love making lists. I was thinking of losing the weight as my task. But, after reading your post several times, it has sunk in to be a "healther lifestyle" as my task. Other wise this weight will be coming right back on. To begin my list: This will begin happening on Monday the 15th. I have this thing about starting things on Mondays.
1) Exercise at least 3x's a week.
2) Start eating a good breakfast.
3) Cut back on smoking to fully quit.
I have read that it takes at least 21 days to begin a new habit,(sometimes longer). I will do these 3 things for 3 weeks and then will add another 2 changes.
The smoking, I have smoked for about 30 years. This is will be my hardest change. Dr. told me that is what she really wants me to work on. She suggusted that I take away 2 to 3 cigarettes a week and slowly cut down to none. I had tried this for awhile and it worked real well, but, then stress of finding out I have asthma and allergy to dust. The dust made me do allot of home changes, like curtains that can be washed weekly, no carpet, special sheets and pillow covers, list goes on and on. I also have HB, High trigrercylites(sp). Which no matter what I do may never change. I am the youngest of 6 and we all have it along with parents. Dr. said I was doomed from the start. Even the always thin ones in the family are on meds for them. Great family history. Is this what you were talking about?
Great advice Jiffypop and everyone. Thanks so much.
I feel so much better now. Time to go make my lists of changes and put them in order of importance. I have another hour of peace time before son gets home.

11-09-2004, 11:29 PM
chipper... ANY of the posts i lost was clearer and more concise than the one i actually managed to post, so i'm grateful that i made ANY kind of sense.

ok. so you now have 3 'to dos' for next week. nice choices.. how do you plan to accomplish them? what form of exercise? do you have what you need to do this [comfy shoes, a floor mat, the video/dvd player is working, whatever it is...]?

and the good breakfast: what IS a good breakfast? for some of us, it's bacon and eggs and toast, for others it's kashi cereal or cottage cheese with fruit. or oatmeal with protein powder. soooo. what is it for you??? [for me, it's a deviled egg made with hot salsa and chili powder, and 2 slices LF cheese on a wasa cracker with some red pepper or tomato - but that's ME, not YOU - or anyone else for that matter]

smoking is a tough one - and doing it at the same time as working on your diet is even tougher. ya gotta be kind and gentle with yourself throughout the whole process.

how many cigarettes less are you planning to smoke? and what will you do instead of smoking? ya can't eat, ya know... against the rules [or is it?? i know we've had some people who have managed to do both... very impressive!!!!]

it's all part of the planning. and we'll work on the list as time goes on... you have to figure out what you want and what you need first...

who knows? you might decide you need barbells!!!!!! believe me, stranger things have happened!!

oh and about the asthma.. yes it's a royal pain. i was very angry about it for a couple of years and wouldn't take my meds. but it FINALLY sunk in that (1) it wasn't going away. (2) if i took the meds as i was supposed to, i wouldn't notice the asthma (3) i needed to carry a rescue inhaler EVERYWHERE [and now i can't find the 3 that are stashed in my pocketbooks and i haven't missed them!!!!]. so, as my doc told me DEAL WITH IT. it's very manageable and you don't have to suffer with this..

11-10-2004, 10:05 AM
Morning all. Doing well in the mind set today. Getting my ducks in a row. Doing my planning for the first day of the good life. My list is as follows:
1) My good breadfast: not to eat 4 pieces of toast smoothered in PB. Although I do now buy low fat. I will measure PB and buy whole wheat bread instead. To be more careful of my choices. To keep the dounts out.
2) Exercise: to either walk outside, or with WOTP tape, or curves.
3) Smoking: cut cigarettes by 3 a day for one week and then 3 more the next week. Since I do smoke allot, because of bordom, I went and bought a bunch of craft things to do instead. As long as my hands are busy. Not to smoke in my van, nor while getting dressed, nor when I get up during the night.
Jiffypop, question? Would it be easier to add to my change list every week or every other week? How long should I wait until I add another change? Like maybe one new change a week?
Thanks guys for the help. It is really getting me to think straight. I still have to work on getting it done. As stated by Sheila53. I want it, but, not sure if I want to do what needs to be done to abtain it. One hour at a time. I know as soon as I see some results the that will kick in.
Thanks again,

11-10-2004, 10:31 AM
good plan, chipper... soooo are you going down to 2 pieces of toast with 1 tbsp of PB on each?

as for the adding to your change list, don't do it until you've gotten into the groove with the changes. this is not torture, or a marathon, or a race. it's a journey that takes us to brand new places and we have to figure them out for ourselves.

so you might change the list once a month or once a week. it's all up to what feels comfortable for you.

some other things that many people around here do include non-food rewards for accomplishments - like every 10 pounds earns a book or a manicure or a CD or a special time with a friend or whatever.

soooo i hope you're reading everything you can find on this and other forums... there's SO MUCH wisdom from SO MANY PEOPLE and that's why this is such a wonderful place.

11-10-2004, 04:42 PM
Heya Chipper!! I quit smoking while changing my eating habits. I quit cold Turkey. I've tried the cutting down approach before and totally bombed at it. I was far to addicted to just cut back. I have faith that whichever approach you take you will do great. I quit in July of this year. I have been smoke free since then. I gained ten pounds but have finally lost them. I won't even say it was easy. It was hard as ****!! The rewards though far outweight the risks of continuing the bad habit. We all know that it is always harder to do the right thing as opposed to doing the wrong thing. In the end though you will be so proud of yourself for doing it. You are stronger than you give yourself credit for. You can do this!! Overcome one thing at a time and then you see that you can overcome about anything that is thrown at you.

You are very much on the right track. The small changes really make a huge difference. Once you really get into the routine of things it will all become normal for you to do. Welcome to the board! We are glad to have you here!

11-10-2004, 06:06 PM
Hey ya'll. Yep, Jiffypop that is the way I am going to do it. 2 toast and 1 tbsp on each, or 2 eggs and 2 toast w/ brumble & brown spread. Better choices. I am getting excited about starting. Like waiting for Christmas morning. I have set my goals and rewards. I am still drumming it into my head that this is not just to lose the weight, but to feel better about me and to improve what health problems I can, and that it is not going to be easy or fast. I don't want that oxygen tank in 20 years like the dr told me could happen if I don't at least start doing something to improve. Everything is getting worse with each new pound gained. Thanks again for the encougement. It's just great.

11-10-2004, 06:21 PM
chipper darlin.. i WAS on an oxygen tank and bedridden. but not now!!!!

you can do this. i promise you. day by day, hour by hour. keep coming back to this fabulous site for help and ideas and wisdom and support. there's always someone around.

sooooo as long as you're ready WHY WAIT FOR MONDAY????