Weight Loss Support - NEWBIE - Encouragement needed!

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11-01-2004, 12:10 PM
Hi, all -

First, let me say what a great resource this site is. It is giving me a lot of encouragement to get on the ball and make the changes that I need to make.

Today is my first day posting. I am a 33 year old teacher with over 100 pounds to lose -not sure how much as I haven't stepped on a scale in several months, and last I checked I was 289 pounds.

I'm seeing a lot of changes in my body that are scaring me. My knees hurt. I have to physically pull myself onto the public bus rather than simply stepping up. I can't fit into an airplane seat like I used to. I get tired easier. I used to love bike riding, walking, and weightlifting, but now I find myself going home after work and finding activities that are physically undemanding (talking on the phone, coffee with friends, etc).

Worst of all, I find myself dreading public events, and I used to be a social butterfly. My brother is getting married in three weeks and I don't want to go. I just lied to an ex-boyfriend to get out of a visit so he won't see how much I've gained in the past few years.

I'm starting to see how my weight will keep me from doing the things that I want to do in my life. All I want to do is travel, and I have already been to some amazing places. However, I don't see how I can go horseback riding on a Costa Rican beach if I can barely pull myself onto a bus, much less a horse! The last time I went to France (three years ago) I noticed that I couldn't fit into the outdoor cafe seats comfortably. Instead of doing something about it, my solution was just not to go back to France!

I'm a college instructor, and I often feel that I should be spending my time taking care of my students rather than taking care of myself. To heck with that - today I'm going back to the gym, where I will step on the sale and get the honest truth about what I have let happen to myself. I will keep you guys posted, and keep up the great work in dispensing advice and encouragement.

11-01-2004, 02:11 PM
Welcome Mighty ru,

Could I suggest that you start small. Try going to fitday.com and counting your fat and calories tomorrow,(its free). Don't change a thing, just count. You will probably be surprised at how many fat and calories you are consuming. Starting the next day cut your fat and calories a little. I am using fitday.com every day. I consume approx 1500 calories per day and approx 50 grams of fat per day. This is working for me because there is nothing I can't eat I just have to count everything. Start exercising sensibly and add to it a little at a time.

Good luck.

11-02-2004, 06:36 PM
Hi mighty, and welcome!

Your comment "...and I often feel that I should be spending my time taking care of my students rather than taking care of myself" rings a HUGE bell with me! I know you know this, but if you don't take care of yourself, you're in no shape to help take care of anyone else. It's the old airplane safety thing..."Put on your own oxygen mask first before assisting those around you".

I've really found myself in crisis mode over the past few weeks and when I took the time to think about why, I realize it was all about me not taking care of myself. My kids come first. My job second. My BF third. I'm not sure I even made the top ten! I was so busy worrying about everyone else that I wasn't eating right, I haven't exercised in way too long, I haven't gotten enough sleep, etc. Now I'm tired, I'm crabby, my clothes don't fit, and there are days I'd rather not get out of bed. In the midst of my pity party on Sunday I was able to recognize the root of the problem. The solution? Take care of me!

Sound easy, right? Simple! But I know myself well enough to know it's neither so I sat down with a journal and made myself a few promises: I will go to bed at 10 pm. I will drink less coffee and more water. I will exercise at least 15 minutes 3X a week. Nothing earth shattering here but I need to take baby steps to get started. If I try to run, I'll get overwhelmed and end up where I started. My goal is no longer to lose XX number of pounds, but to fit into my current clothes comfortably. Once I have that under control, who knows what I'll have the energy (and confidence) to take on?????

You're facing a big challenge - start small and build your way to great things!

11-02-2004, 08:20 PM
Hi Mighty and welcome to the forum!
I've recently discovered this great group of ladies here just in the past week. I'm certain you will love it and find a lot of info and support here! There's so many threads here...it's rather over whelming at first but visit as many as you'd like and post...you'll find the ones that you like the best and will continure to visit them often if not every day. (it's very addicting! :smug: ) Good luck and if you ever need someone to talk to I've been keeping a journal, you can come see me!

11-02-2004, 10:58 PM
Welcome, Mighty RU!

You've stumbled on a WONDERFUL place! Look around at the different posts and find a group or two that you seem to click with and jump right in. Everyone is very welcoming and supportive. They'll answer any questions you have and just be there to cheer you on.

Your story sounds very similar to mine. I'll be 33 next month and have over 100 pounds to lose, and I'll tell you I started back on my weight loss journey thanks to one very tight airplane seat! I almost had to ask for a seatbelt extender. I was mortified as I had not considered myself heavy enough for one of those. But the belts don't lie, do they?

You can absolutely do this, and you deserve to be happy and healthy. We'll all help you however we can, but the key is to make a reasonable plan to change your lifestyle and then stick to it. Good luck to you and I look forward to seeing you around the posts! :flow1:

11-02-2004, 11:28 PM
Hi girls, I wanna join your thread too. ;)

Skinny, you are right, this place is addictive! LOVE it here!

We can and WILL do this!!!

It is soo hard to lose the weight we need to lose without this kind of help. Thanks you guys!!

11-02-2004, 11:51 PM
Welcome to you too Carrie!!

11-03-2004, 10:31 PM
Hi Mighty RU-

I'm 52 and recently lost over 100 lbs. I too didn't really know what I weighed when I started, for me I knew that if I got on scales and found the real number that I'd get more discouraged - so I just figure from the weight I last remembered seeing on my scales. For me it was 258 and that was about 3 months before I woke up one day and decided that I was going to make some changes to regain my health.

Like you, I was having knee problems, I also had a plantar fascia foot injury, and my heart would just pound and I'd get out of breath getting out of bed and walking to the bathroom.... which by the way, the seat was beginning to be uncomfortably small cuz my rear was getting so big. (blush, blush)

I started with cutting back on fats and sweets, started pulling back the last time I'd eat at night. Started with 1 am being the latest for a couple weeks, then midnight with the goal of 9 PM being the last time I'd eat. I found I would get hungry for breakfast that way, and start my metabolism off early in the day with a good protein with breakfast. I never did count calories - still don't- I figured after 30 some odd years of yo-yo dieting, that for me counting calories wasn't the answer this time and I already knew healthy foods from the fattening ones.

I didn't exercise for about 3 months because I felt too unhealthy. When I did start I did just 5 minutes straight here at home walking thru the house. Then I did 5 minutes twice a day for a week or so and extended the time. When I got up to 15 min I would walk the aisles in the stores before shopping. I always wanted to be near a phone in case I had a heart attack or got hurt somehow.

I built myself up to an hour walk 3-4 times a week. I dipped into my personal savings to get a real nice treadmill with an adjustable cushioning deck for my feet and knees. It has a lot of other bells and whistles, bright lights and gizmos that hubby likes. He actually uses it more than me cuz I prefer walking out in the fresh air and sunshine. But when it's all cold and rainy in the winter I do use it more too.

I also got a pedometer - can find them from $3 for one that just counts steps up to $30 for the talking ones that gives calories used and other things. I used the pedometer to remind me that movement was important too, it's not just all about "exercise". I figure any movement is better than being a couch potato, so I wanted to be able to get an "atta girl" for it. I also felt like I had a little secret buddy with me all the time. Because I could hear a faint little click as it counts, it would remind me that my goals and dreams are important and I would not give up on myself. I sometimes got a little wry smile just knowing that the extra walking in store aisles was getting me closer to my goal. I still get a secret little bit of enthusiasm and joy when I wear my little pedometer. It's my little buddy.

Good luck on your journey back to health. This is a great site for encouragement or for venting, or for sharing positive steps. There's so much diversity of plans being used, and such supportive, caring people. I'm a newbie here, but feel very welcomed and among friends.


SW/259 CW/156 GW/ 144-148 (maintained for 6 months then.... ooops)

11-04-2004, 09:42 PM
Waving to you from south Louisiana. Welcome to the board. It's been awhile since I have visited here, but this is a really wonderful place where we all care about each other and try to encouarage each other. Just start by making small changes and setting small goals, you will do fine, check in here often we are all here for you. God Bless and good luck.

Jennifer 3FC
11-21-2004, 06:11 PM
Pyxie, I just wanted to say GOOD FOR YOU! That is great that you exercised for 5 minutes at a time in the beginning. Many people would think 'why bother', and you're here to tell them why! Thanks for sharing!!

11-26-2004, 05:49 PM
Hi Mighty RU...the ladies who responded here are all wonderful, losing weight, and on target. I am relatively new to this site, but find it addictive in a most positive sense. Aside from the tons of information, opinions, articles, etc. you get here, there is one very important thing: A buddy! Now, I have always been a lone star, always did things better on my own. Except for losing weight. I have found two super buddies, Barb and Rebecca, to whom I send angels' halos. They have become friends for life, even though we live thousands of miles apart. We keep each other focused on the real issues of weight loss, call a spade a spade, and cyber-hug each other for small successes. We write daily, including writing weekly and daily goals. I am baby-stepping, can you tell? And so far I have managed to lose 3 whole lbs. Duh? Yeah the hardest thing to do so far, which has jump-started my motivation. I am now interested in following a stricter diet, joining Curves, and really losing the 80-90 lbs that I need to lose to be healthy and slimmer. While motivation comes from within, and from actually doing something, buddies are the ones who keep it going with their encouragement and plain old girlie wisdom and support.

So...welcome again. If you are a loner like me, you will be surprised to find what a buddy can do for you in your quest to lose weight and get healthy. It is worth a try. If I could share my buddies with you, I would, but I ain't letting go of these two peaches just yet. Good Luck and Blessings to you. Cathy

11-26-2004, 06:20 PM
This message is for all the ladies trying hard to lose, and especially to DebbieJarrell, for telling us about Fitday.com. I did not know it existed, thinking that this (3FChx)site is the be all and end all of weight loss. It is, still! However, Fitday.com adds a little reality to check to your daily weight-loss plan. Try it...you will see. I just had a major eye-opener regarding why the heck I am not losing more than these eternal 3 lbs. It is because I do not know how to count calories, carbs, etc., and Fitday just did it for me...to the tune of, "You gotta eat less, girlfriend, if ya wanna lose da weight...da dee da la la." Interesting song, for those of us who need to see the facts and figures about the real weight loss busters: too many calories, too much fat, too many carbs on a daily, meal-by-meal basis. So, henceforth, I will be checking in with FatChicks AND Fitday.com (it is free!) everyday, for a pre-tally and post-tally of what the numbers add up to. I recommend it to all, especially to those of us who have the special knack of "thinking" we know it all. Get the facts, weight-losers, just the facts! Thanks again Debbie for this information. Cathy

11-26-2004, 09:13 PM

You're welcome. I am glad it is helping you as much as it has helped me.