South Beach Diet - Shower like a woman.... a chuckle for the day.

little chick
09-16-2004, 10:28 AM
Sorry Beach I now we are susposed to use the thread but I could not find it. :o

How to Shower Like a Woman

1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper
lights and darks.
2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband
the way, cover up any exposed areas.
3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to
4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long
wide loofah, and pumice stone.
5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added
6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with
natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.
8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes
9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
10. Rinse conditioner off hair.
11. Shave armpits and legs.
12. Turn off shower.
13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with
14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
in super absorbent towel.
15. Check entire body for blemishes, tweeze hairs.
16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

How to Shower Like a Man
1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave
a pile.
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake
at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your
and scratch your ***.
4. Get in the shower.
5. Wash your face.
6. Wash your armpits.
7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they
in the shower.
9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the
11. Shampoo your hair.
12. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
13. Pee.
14. Rinse off and get out of shower.
15. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain
hanging out of tub the whole time.
16. Admire wiener size in mirror again.
17. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
18. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife,

off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.
19. Throw wet towel on bed.

09-16-2004, 10:48 AM


09-16-2004, 04:20 PM
That is soooo funny! I am sitting here at work & have tears in my eyes from reading this - thanks, I needed a laugh.

09-16-2004, 04:47 PM
What a freakin hoot!!!

09-16-2004, 06:43 PM
:rofl: :lol3:

09-16-2004, 06:57 PM
What Ellis said.............................................. ..................... :lol: