100 lb. Club - How do I stop!




View Full Version : How do I stop!


howie6267
08-31-2004, 07:17 PM
I am driving myself crazy weighing all the time. Yesterday I was a pound down from last week. Today I am 3 pounds up Grrrrrr! I know I should not be doing that and I used to be really good at weighing only once a week. Every since they put the new scale in the back it is so easy to go back there and weigh in. I think when I get below 350 I will just start weighing in at my doctors office. That way I would only go once a week. Until then I need to stay away from the scale.


gatsby
08-31-2004, 07:48 PM
i take it they put a scale at the gym? is that what you mean? well i made a decision never to weigh myself if i've had anything to eat or drink so it's got to be frist thing in the morning or nothing. this is hard because i don't have a scale at home. hmmmm maybe that would be an incentive to get a boyfriend (with a scale) :lol:
anyways that what i do. but if you weigh yourself only once in a long while then it doesn't really matter if you've eaten. it seems like the battle for self-control is never ending sometimes but you're doing so great, keep it up!
gen

howie6267
08-31-2004, 07:53 PM
No the scale is at work back in the shiping area. I work second shift so I always weigh after I've ate. I think it will be ok if I switch to my doctors scales here in a few weeks.


nelie
08-31-2004, 09:08 PM
I'm a bad weigher, I weigh every time that I go to the gym ;) which ends up being at least 5 times a week. The weight fluctuations don't bother me so I don't think it is a problem. If the weight fluctuations bother you, just try to hold on and do it only once a week.

funniegrrl
08-31-2004, 09:26 PM
Look at it this way -- you KNOW the numbers are meaningless when you weigh every day. The body just fluctuates too much for those numbers to give you any useful data, even if you do weigh at the same time under the same conditions.

OK, so knowing that, why do you still get on the scale? Why would you do something despite the fact that your logical brain knows it's pointless at best and harmful (mentally/spiritually) at worst? Because it's a compulsion. People who are overweight -- especially those in our groups -- are prone to compulsive behaviors. In fact, most people who have any type of eating disorder, whether it is simply compulsive overeating, binging, bulimia, anorexia, etc., have some sort of obsessive-compulsive disorders or tendencies. If you (and I mean "all of us" not just you Howie) look at your life, you'll probably see other areas where you exhibit compulsive behavior. I play FreeCell over and over and over and over and .... Similarly, weighing yourself when you know the information isn't valid or helpful -- feeling an overwhelming desire to do it -- is a compulsion.

So, how do you control a compulsion? I'm not an expert ... but for me it's cold turkey. The way I control compulsive eating is to not take that first bite of a trigger food, to measure out how much of a food I'm going to eat and portioning it out ahead of time, etc. If I had a scale problem, I would stay off all scales period for ... a month? Six weeks? Give yourself specific rules about when and where you will weigh after that.

I wasn't compulsive about weighing daily or anything, but when I started my program I knew from previous experience that even a weekly weigh-in was a source for self-sabotage. I knew I needed to free myself from the idea that my success or failure was based on what the scale said. I did not want to face that first week of seeing the scale go up because it was my period, even though I would know the number wasn't "real." So, at my weekly weighin I got on backwards and did not see how much I weighed for SIX MONTHS. I did allow my counselor to give me an update every six weeks of how much I had lost up to that point. That was incredibly freeing.

If you do what you are supposed to do, the weight will come off. The scale is NOT your friend, it is a saboteur disguised as a friend. So, go cold turkey and forget it exists. Live your life, eat your food, do your exercise, and let the chips fall where they may. You'll be amazed at the difference it will make in how you approach your program.

howie6267
08-31-2004, 09:33 PM
Thanks so much funniegrrl. I know I need to do like you say and treat it like I do my eating habits. I don't think I can go a month at a time because I've tried it before and I screw up and say oh well this won't hurt me because I don't weigh for another 3 weeks. So I do need the weekly accountability. As for daily I need to and will put that to a stop.

lessofsarahtolove
08-31-2004, 10:58 PM
This is a really interesting thread, and it's got me thinking. Thank you, Howie, for bringing up this topic; and thank you, funniegirl, for sharing your experience and perspective -- very interesting stuff, and you make some valid points.

This whole experience of losing weight is just so interesting to me, and I love the thinking which accompanies the process almost as much as I love the losing! Howie, I'm glad that you recognized that the compulsive weighing isn't productive for you, and have the self-awareness to realize also that you need the structure and responsibility of a weekly weigh-in.

likemarigold
08-31-2004, 11:48 PM
this is an intersesting thread. i think you're exactly right about compulsions, funniegrrl. when i first started losing weight, i developed a number of what i have later identified (gotta love talk therapy) as replacement compulsions, and i think it's probably a similar thing for you, howie. it was simple: i stopped thinking about food all the time--well, let's say i stopped thinking about when i could next eat all the time--and so i needed other habits to replace it with.

at my best, i was checking 3fatchicks 300 times a day, and reading posts like it was goin' out of style. at my worst, i was imagining falling down my own basement stairs up to 50 times a day, unable to to stop the fantasy until it had ended with my inevitable crash at the foot of the steps.

for a person who had never experienced any symptoms of anxiety before, it was a pretty scary period in my life. but what i have realized is, the eating, although familiar, comfortable, and "normal" (in that everyone eats, although not everyone eats as much as i used to), was a manifestation of anxiety and compulsiveness too--i was just so used to it that i wasn't alarmed.

in the 4 months since i started losing, i've noticed that with time, my compulsions and obsessions have ceased. i forced myself to use the basement stairs three times a day, and am happy to report that i never think of them anymore. i can't even evoke those terribly vivid fantasies anymore if i try. in the meantime, i've cultivated a nice little compulsive need to keep a food diary, and am banking on the idea that in the end, my compulsions can start working for me, rather than against.

oh, and as for weighing--pick a scale and commit to it, howie, and make sure it's out of the way. i only weigh at my support group meetings, and at curves--but only at curves on weeks when i have to miss a meeting, and then only on the meeting day. scales fluctuate, bodies fluctuate, and we have lives to live. switch your compulsion to drinking water or some other healthy behavior, and train your mind to think all other scales are too unpredictable to touch.

howie6267
09-01-2004, 12:21 AM
Yes I think when this scale at work says I am under 350 the next week I will go to the doctors and weigh. At that point I will take what ever the doctors scale says and not check it against the one at work. That way I will be stuck with using the doctors scale and therefore only weigh once a week.

mezmerize
09-01-2004, 01:36 AM
Howie sounds like you have a good plan. Maybe it was your salt intake for that day or not enough water, or the cloths you were wearing weight more. Don't let it get to you. Your doing great!!
MEZ

renaanderick
09-01-2004, 01:51 AM
I weigh myself everyday, I have a problem. Every morning I weigh myself and sometimes throughout the day. I try not to weigh myself, but when I look at the scale it is like it is talking to me telling me to get on. I can't stop. I started my diet 7-11-04 weighing 187, I now weigh 175. I cannot stay off of the scale. I know how you all feel like the scale will magically say I lost 5 pounds overnight. LOL Hang in there on your diet!!!!

artist
09-01-2004, 04:43 AM
Hey Howie

Thanks for bringing this up - I have also got into a not very good habit of weighing every day.....as someone who had never owned a pair of scales until November last year, that is quite scary really.

So. I'lle do a deal with you. I will stop checking every day, if you will! I am going to try it for a week, starting today.....well, I'lle be honest, its easy today since I'm staying away in a hotel for work, and there's no scale here!!!! Freedom!

Happy scale-free week, Howie!

howie6267
09-01-2004, 01:58 PM
Your on. My official weigh in day is tomorrow though. After that though I will not step on until next Thursday. Thanks Claire.

artist
09-01-2004, 02:19 PM
My pleasure, Howie......hmmmm. I am going to find this tough....I think I had better hide that scale.....otherwise I am going to be tempted......hmmm...I will put it somewhere very high, since I'm only 5 foot 2 inches, and I would not wish to suffer the indignity of jumping to reach my own scale!

howie6267
09-01-2004, 02:52 PM
LOL on jumping. Mines not so easy it is only a short walk to the scale at work and the darn thing knows my name. howie... Howie... HOWIE come and weigh yourself.

barbygirl43
09-01-2004, 06:52 PM
LOL you are too funny...

that's the other reason why I'm only going to weigh every other week. For the past couple of weeks I stepped on the scale every morning to see how my weight would fluctuate and could feel myself becoming very friendly with my scale and want to step on it every time I was in the bathroom. I was actually going to send my scale home with my mom for 2 weeks to keep me from even being tempted to check it but I didn't and I'm going to go ahead and wait until Sept. 13 before I step on it.

IMO I think why we love to step on that scale is because it's exciting to see the numbers go down. And then when we don't see the loss we wanted or a gain, we step on it even more, willing the number to go down.I know that's been my experience.

Br00klyn
09-01-2004, 09:07 PM
Howie, thanks for bringing this up! I'm really bad about obsessing over the scale! I weigh myself every time I go to the gym (almost daily) and sometimes even twice! :eek:

However, I don't let the daily fluctuations get to me.. But, I have to stop.. Look at it this way.. You're weigh in day is like a TREAT! :lol: Just keep going for the week and know you'll have a reward at the end... seeing the scale go down. ;)

We should start a NON-SCALE Challenge.. hehehe! Or a "Weighers Anonymous Meeting".... Just a thought..

Gardenwife
09-01-2004, 09:27 PM
LOL on jumping. Mines not so easy it is only a short walk to the scale at work and the darn thing knows my name. howie... Howie... HOWIE come and weigh yourself.

There are so many worse things to have calling your name, Howie. Like me, for instance. "GET YOUR A$$ OFF THAT SCALE!"

I can relate, though...It's easy to casually step on my MIL's scale when I'm in our basement doing a load of laundry. Not gonna do it, wouldn't be prudent. I need to just weight at the doctor's office, too. Maybe we can have a weekly weigh-in and coffee day. :coffee:

howie6267
09-01-2004, 09:36 PM
That sounds like fun. A hot date with a beautiful woman. I can here it now do you and your wife still date? Why yes we do. I take her to the doctors office every week to weigh in and then we go for coffee. LOL That does sound like a plan though.

seashell
09-01-2004, 09:46 PM
Boy did your post strike a nerve with me. I tend to weight in the morning and in the evening. I know I shouldn't do this, but it keeps me motivated. The problem? My scale believes it's a commedian! If I put my weight forward, I gain 3 pounds. Too far back? Lose 2 pounds. Move the scale forward? Gain! Back? Lose! I have the floor marked so I know where to keep the darn thing. UGHHHHH! It's actually become a sort of sadistic entertainment toy for me. Maybe someday, I will get a scale that cost more than $19.00 at Walmart. Till then? I love losing 2 pounds in the 2 seconds it takes to adjust my weight on the scale.

And Howie, if it makes you feel better, my scale talks to me too! It says, "Hey, I love messing with this SCALAHOLIC'S head!

Gardenwife
09-01-2004, 10:44 PM
My MIL's scale weighs me differently depending on if I lean forward or back. My favorite diet scale tip comes from Rita Rudner:

I have a method of weighing myself in the morning. I hang off the shower curtain and gradually lower myself to the scale. When it gets to the right weight, I try to black out.

Katey78
09-02-2004, 11:17 AM
oh, I hate the scale too, but just can't stop weighing in every morning at the gym (my scales at home have been banished to stop myself weighing everytime I go to the bathroom).

I keep telling myself to just weigh myself once I week, but I can't stop myself, and as it costs 50p a time at the gym, my obession is costing me at least 3 a week!!

funniegrrl
09-02-2004, 02:33 PM
Don't take any change to the gym.

artist
09-02-2004, 06:31 PM
OK Howie, how you doing on avoiding that scale? I am happy to report that I have not gone near Mr Scale at all today......OK, so I haven't banished him to that very high place either.....but so far so good!

Tammy32
09-03-2004, 01:03 AM
Here is how you solve this problem.

1. Pick up scale
2. Walk over to nearest window
3. Say a few ill words to the dumb thing. Really tell it what you think.
4. Give it the big heave-ho right out the window.
5. Proceed to walk outside and just for an afterthought jump up and down on the remaining parts that are not totally destroyed.

This will do wonders for your stress level. This procedure will give you some really good closure too!! Hehehe..

Howie, you are doing so well. I really think that you can do anything you put your mind to and I think that if you decide not to weigh on that scale everyday you won't. You will have this licked in no time.

Edit:typos..like normal.

lessofsarahtolove
09-03-2004, 01:05 AM
:lol3: Tammy have I tokd you recently how great it is to have you back?? Truly, you are such an inspiration to me. I really mean that.

Tammy32
09-03-2004, 01:11 AM
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

lessofsarahtolove
09-03-2004, 01:18 AM
;)

howie6267
09-03-2004, 02:14 AM
Thanks Tammy, I think I will do fine this week. I have a deal with Claire to not weigh. So today was my weigh in and that it for a week.

artist
09-03-2004, 07:21 PM
Tammy - you have really made me laugh.....I'm very tempted to take your advice.....I think my neighbours might enjoy watching me jump up and down on the scale in the street! However, it was such a big deal for me to buy that scale in November last year, and I did fork out more than a few pounds for it, that I confess I'm not ready to destroy it yet....

Howie - the good news is I have avoided Mr Scale today, too. I have randomly selected Wednesday for weigh-in day, so I will aim not to go near the damn thing until then......(Actually, Wednesday is not so random.....its when I go and weigh in at the 'Fat Club' which I go to....and am increasingly hating going to....so it make sense to do my home weigh in the same day...)

So here's to a scale-free weekend.....

howie6267
09-03-2004, 11:53 PM
I did not weigh today also. And the weekend it easy because of not being at work. So I am good through Tuesday.

Annie-Rose
09-04-2004, 05:57 AM
Excellent.

Annie-Rose
09-04-2004, 06:00 AM
My sister in law has talking scales.
Why??????????
They don't even have a volume control :lol: so I never weigh myself there.

SwimGirl
09-04-2004, 10:02 AM
omg seashell! I have that SAME SCALE! I have two actually ( lost one, needed another, and so on), and they are about 20 pounds apart, so I call one my fat scale, and one my skinny scale. I used the "fat" scale to determine my WW points (more food? sounds good to me!), and I use the skinny scale when I feel discouraged. It's almost a game, to see how much I can get my scale to fluctuate. Yesterday, I got on the scale, fully dressed, and got a nice number, but since I normally weigh myself in just a bra and undies, I stripped down (TMI? :P ) , and it GAVE ME A HIGHER NUMBER. So I swore at it. Is it wrong that I have a relationship with my scale? In the past weeks I've talked to it more than my bf...

Ivanna B. Skinny
09-04-2004, 01:38 PM
:hyper: :rofl: :lol3: You all are so damn funny!!! :lol3: :rofl: :hyper:

artist
09-05-2004, 03:22 PM
OK Howie I am happy, pleased and proud to report that i have had a scale-free weekend. Thanks for getting me started on this one Howie - I think I am finding it easier to stay on track this way!