100 lb. Club - Here's a problem....
08-24-2004, 11:33 PM
I've been thinking about this all day and realize I absolutely cannot do it.
I have heard people say (not necessarily here) that you should envision yourself thin or at least thinner.
I can't do it.
I have been big for so long, the concept of being smaller completely escapes me. I just cannot grasp it nor wrap my mind around it. This scares me.
Because what if the day comes when the weight starts to fall away...will I still not be able to see myself as thinner? Will I look in the mirror and only see how far I have to go and not how far I've come?
There are lots of big losers on this board (that sounds terrible but you know what I mean! Weight losers!), so how did it effect you? Could you imagine yourself a smaller person and what did you see when you looked in the mirror?
08-24-2004, 11:39 PM
i think your fat is a security blanket to u in a way if that makes sense. I think you are afraid to lose that blanket cuz then what will you have. I think you have as well as others more issues then jsut your weight. (not trying to put u down trying to help) Maybe you cant see the skinny you because you want the fat you to stick around to be that security blanket. I dont mean u dont want to lsoe weight u could very well want to but i mean on a deeper level. I'm not a big lsoer only like 40 lbs but i kno all i think bout is how much more i have to lose (another 40) i dont htink bout how skinny i am now as compared to before i lsot the weight.
if i am of no help sorry iam only 20
08-24-2004, 11:57 PM
So maybe visulization isn't your strong point. Let it go, and just follow your plan. Body image is one of those tricky things. I was 265 lbs and thought I looked fine, not that I looked that much or for all that long. When I was smaller I could only see the flaws. Today about 90 lbs. down from my highest I am always fighting a battle with myself. Some days I say, "Wow, what a beautiful woman you are becoming" (I am 32 :lol: ) other days I say, "**** you, you ugly *****" Both things come out of my own fear and other issues.
So my advice to you is cross each day as it comes, and face yourself in the mirror as you get smaller.
Safe and healthy journey to you!
08-25-2004, 12:27 AM
LakeGirl, there may be other less loaded things that you cannot imagine yourself being either, like male, or blind, or Mrs. Donald Trump -- but still if you woke up as one of them your reality would change and your view of yourself and the world would be altered. We are all works in progress, and our perspectives -- while always reflecting our personal realities -- are fluid as well.
I wouldn't bog yourself down with unproductive or hindering thought right now....you need to think in terms of possibilities and positive certainties. For instance, if you eat right and exercise, you will have more energy. If you limit your portions, you will feel proud of yourself. If you meet your commitments to yourself, you will gain confidence. These are the possibilities -- these are the positive certainties. I don't see your current inability to envision yourself thin as a problem. I see it as another muscle to be developed. For a lot of us, this process involves work on the head as well as the body, and you'll do that also as you're progressing.
It's a journey, not a destination.....and your view along the way will change and evolve. Just start, and focus your thought on those things under your control, like what you're going to eat and how you're going to move your body. The rest will come. :goodvibes
08-25-2004, 12:56 AM
Lakegirl, maybe you should think about how it would make you FEEL instead of how it would make you (EDIT) look.
For example, "If I looked in the mirror and saw a thinner, healthier person, i would FEEL _____." Or, "If I pulled a size __ jeans over my hips and they buttoned, I would FEEL..." or, "If I could run two miles in less than twenty minutes, I would feel..."
You're not psychic. YOu can't just look in the mirror and say "hmmm, eight inches of the hips, six off the thighs... ah, i see it!" You know? I think that's very hard to do.
Fact is, it's daunting. This losing weight thing is daunting as all ****, to every single one of us. Sarah had an excellent suggestion- don't bog yourself down with those thoughts. Don't worry that you can't "see" yourself differently- that will come in time.
08-25-2004, 01:24 AM
:yes: :yes: :yes: :yes: Dana is so smart.
08-25-2004, 01:28 AM
aaaaw. That is a big compliment coming from Ms. Encyclopedia.
08-25-2004, 12:20 PM
hmmm. let's add another suggestion to this fabulous list... how about thinking that 'if i were thin, i'd be doing ... or eating ... or thinking .... '
and fill in the blanks.. so you'd be living as if you were thin.. this sort of stuff helps me since i don't have a real strong connection with my physical being. well, it's getting better, but i still have a long way to go. the one thing that's helped me establish ANY sort of connection is weight lifting. of all things.
I was sort of thinking the same thing as LakeGirl just yesterday. I was shopping at WalMart and walked by the lingerie section and saw these impossibly small underwear. I thought to myself that I would never be able to fit into something that small. I think the last time I wore underwear that size was when I was about 12! Mind you these were adult women underwear, very lacy and feminine. I can picture myself as being at a normal weight but I couldn't see myself wearing that tiny bit of underwear. Must have been for a size 2!