Support Groups - Rears in Gear for the New Year - August

Yooooo hooooo, chickies....

:s:

Are you ready?

Good morning all you wonderful ladies. Here's to a great month for all of us. Happy, I see you have an inner Viruqua as well. That little spoiled three year old that wants what she wants NOW. I battle her a lot. I think that is the battle between how we have trained ourselves to be and do, and what we know in our minds is the right thing to do. all part of developing new habits.

I have a ton of cleaning, work, horses, gym, and yoga to do today. I hope you all have a great day, and I will check in later.

HEre's to August.

Ok chicks.

August is a new beginning for me in so many areas of my life. I reached some important realizations very recently (that you Jolly for letting me ramble on in my e-mails to you).

One, over analyzing gets me stuck in the mire. Two, I do not want to be "normal" I want to be BETTER. Three, my goals and dreams can be integrated, they do not have to be separate issues fighting for my attention.

At some point, I just have to say to myself "do you want this? are you willing to do what it's going to take? yes, or no?" If the answer is yes, then do it. If the answer is no... oh well. It's not going to happen.

If I want to be better, more powerful, stronger, leaner, meaner, tougher, add your preferred adjective here, then I need to understand I must push harder, expect more, and perform to a higher level. That's a fact. The resentment I feel, the chip on my shoulder, has no place in my life if I want this for myself. There is no one to be angry with anymore, this is not being forced on me by anyone. These are MY dreams, MY goals, MY desires. Do I want it, or not?

In February, I will be (assuming my tax return is what I think it will be) getting on a plane to Arizona to attend my orientation training for the AANHCP (American Association of Natural Hoofcare Practitioners). I met one of my mentors on Friday, and she's a very cool chick. I cannot accept that I will get on that plane 50 pounds overweight and out of shape. Also, if I'm going to be running my own business, I need to get organized about money and taxes. So then... my dreams all have become one focused arrow pointing to my passion of working with horses for a living. I knew somehow that would happen, I just wasn't sure how. Now I know.

Yesterday I did my 3 mile walk/run on the treadmill. Between the heat and lack of exercise for the last three months, it nearly killed me. But I did it, and I'll do it again tomorrow. Today, I did my 20 minute pilates routine. I thought I was going to throw a brick through the TV (again). I remember THAT feeling. It kicked my butt. OTOH, I love the way my stomach feels after just ONE session.

I will not spend time on "why did I let myself go for three months!?" I will look forward over the next seven months and observe the changes, focus on the goals, and realize this is the rest of my life I'm talking about, not just a short term thing. The spirit is willing, let the flesh be strong!

Good morning everyone. Raven, thanks for starting up the new thread. It's the 2nd here already and I'm contemplating whether I go to work or not. I'm in a bad way, actually. Too many problems at work. I'm feeling used and then ignored, like a faithful servant who is summoned, then dismissed and never , ever allowed to really be one of the family. I'm surely not the only one who feels this way as this has always been the atmosphere in our company. It is Japanese-run and the foreigners are treated little better than slaves. Recently, however, I'm feeling it more than ever as the company is in dire straits and there seems to be a growing feeling of animosity coming from the Japanese and especially those in charge. The foreigners are demoralized and rightfully so and I'm just giving up hope.

It doesn't help that this seems to be reflected in all aspects of my life, my inability to lose weight or progress in my riding. Yesterday I was very close to tears during my lesson. I try so hard and yet don't seem to make progress. I know that if I don't break from this attitude it will only get worse. But how to break from it when I have absolutely no glimmer of success anywhere. This is really really bad and I'm sorry to dump it on you but I'm slipping into a state of paralysis.

Really need to shake myself out of this.

Raven -- reading your post I think you're similar in that you over-analyze things, feelings and attitudes and yes, if we just keep mulling them we're probably just going to get more of the same. I tried to do the positive thinking approach but it just didn't work. I felt like an idiot saying things are ok to myself when they sure as **** aren't, saying they're going to get better when I haven't seen them get better in years. I think, as you say, the trick may be in just deciding on a plan and sticking to it. This is so hard and because I've let things slide so far little baby steps are almost invisible. They give me no feeling of satisfaction and all the things I don't want to be doing but have to be just to pay the bills give me next to no time to work on myself and these baby steps. But we've got to and what better time than with the beginning of a new month.

I'm glad to hear you're planning to go to see more about this hoof-care education. But Raven, why are you worrying about being 50 lbs overweight at this point? Getting on that plane and getting going in this new endeavor will probably be just what you need for the weight to start coming off seemingly effortlessly. Don't put the cart before the horse. But I know how you feel. Yesterday I spent a ton of money on magazines and books, money I don't have. But I said to myself, I need this, I need the inspiration. I need to give myself something to aim for and to pull myself away from the muck of a mindset I've been wallowing in. So I bought magazines and plan to make a collage of pictures that embody the look I want, and I don't mean that in just the external, cosmetic sense. I mean, for example, a picture that to me symbolizes what I want even in abstract terms, such as a quiet woods for serenity or a smiling child for a curiosity about new things, a blue sky and white clouds for a feeling of calm and hope. Japanese magazines depress me with all their pictures of women with whom I can't, don't want to, relate to. So I splurged on foreign magazines.

Well, I must get moving here so I can at least be ready to go to work if I so decided.

Check on you all later.

Hey all. Pretty good day here. Hopped on the scale to see how it looked after the family party yesterday. Did a bit more cardio to compensate. Did not do my yoga tape, but did walk down to the local festival going on.

Raven I am so happy for you. The steps you are making. Taking that jump into a new avocation. You are an inspiration. And congrats on getting back to working out. My aerobics instructor had us do some Pilates leg moves Friday - I thought I would die. She said she did them while watching tv. I figure that would be the fastest way to get me to stop watching tv.

Red, I am sorry you are having such a rough time of it right now. There are two things that help me through bad times. 1) remind myself that everything I do is a choice. It helps for me to take the stigma of "good" or "bad" out of myeating. It is just a choice. some choices are better than others. Some choices may make it take longer to get to my goal. But it is just a choice. If I can think about what I am doing a little bit more, it seems to help keep me from sliding into mindless eating, or couch sitting. 2) Have a back up plan. Trying to make major changes in your lifestyle and habits while the world is crashing in around you doesn't work. You have to decide what is ok, while you sort out the top priorities, so you don't backslide or feel bad about yourself, but aren't adding more stress to your world. Like I said - just things that work for me.

Have a great evening (or day) all, and talk more tomorrow. Welcome back Derry.

Can't believe I just typed this enourmously long post and then my computer went nuts and I lost it...... wonder if it's this web site or me?
At any rate, I weighed myself this morning and I stayed exactly the same while away. :D I guess that is a good thing considering how "bad" I was during the week. I think what saved me from a huge gain was making a promise to myself to spend at least 40 minutes exercising while I was gone. :cool:
So, Red, and anyone else who took my challenge for the week? Any losses? Am I donating money to the food pantry or not?
Raven, way to go with those goals! I you set acheivable "sub" goals along your path, I think it will help out. If you say you will lose 50 pounds by February, that is quite overwhelming. Maybe you can divide that into weekly or monthly smaller goals to keep on target? Also, set up rewards (not food!) for when you realize those goals. I still OWE myself a 10 pound reward of a new dress, but I think I am going to change it to pants. Didn't have time to shop while I was on vacation. My budget is a bit low right now, but I can maybe buy them at a thrift shop or on sale?
Red, I feel so badly about your job situation. Sounds like you've been really having rough times. But, as the old saying goes.....when the going get's tough, the tough get going. Maybe you should look for another job? Is that possible for you to do? Maybe putting on a happy face and setting your mind to a positive stance might help combat these things as well. :?: I know how defeating having a rough job situation can be due to Lancelot's job thing with his boss "Whacky", wasn't that what we called him? Lancelot spent time every day on his laptop and was on the cell phone while we were on vacation, but I ignored it and didn't make matters worse by making remarks about his lack of freedom, etc.
Upon return home, yesterday, he spent time on line seeking out other jobs and sent his resume in of a few of them. I'm hopeful.
So, before my computer goes nuts again, I'm going to finish this post!
Going grocery shopping this morning with the intent of buying very healthy items to have on hand this week!
Take care and have a good Monday (or Tuesday???) to all!
Linda
Oh yes, don't know if this link will work, but here are a few family photos I took this past week. None of me, though, I was the photographer! My kids, family, summer camp, boats, Lancelot sailing and cat watching the squirrel on the birdfeeder are there. You guys might like to see what summer in the mountains on a lake in NH looks like!
http://www.ofoto.com/BrowsePhotos.jsp?Ucollid=228834747103&Uphotoid=928834747103&Uc=b1dqjnvj.2x4iaswv&Uy=4oiymm&Ux=0&collid=228834747103&page=1&sort_order=0

~A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.~
- Herm Albright

Just read this on another thread and copied it for Red, especially. I quite liked it!
Linda, off now for real!

Good morning all. Derry, congrats on staying the same. It is great that you were able to go, have a good time, not feel like you had to sacrifice anything, and not gain weight. Way to go!

I lost 5 pounds this week. Woo hoo.

I hope everyone has a good week. Here's to us :)

Good morning, chickies!

Well, in spite of the fact that I'm feeling a little puny ... (my tummy is upset, yuck) I did my standard 2 miles on the treadmill. Again, it took me longer than it would have 3 months ago, but that is understandable. Tomorrow morning it will be pilates again.

My eating is fairly good, could be better, but that will take care of itself.

Derry - Good work on keeping the weight the same during the vacation! Yes, I do set mini goals for myself. But I also know I have a long term goal, and it helps me to see a long term path. I aim for 7 pounds a month. As far as rewards? My reward is my weight loss. I've never been able to get anything out of spending money on myself because I lost weight - that's never been an incentive. My reward really is the goal achieved. That feeling beats anything else I've ever tried.

Jolly - :lol3: I love the idea of using pilates as a reason to not watch TV. It is still about the most effective program I have found for working the core muscles.

Red - I wish I could reach through the monitor and give you a big hug. I know what it's like to be stuck. To feel unappreciated, taken advantage of in a work situation. I know there aren't any easy answers, too. And sometimes it just poisons everything else in your life. It becomes very difficult to sort out what you really feel bad about, and what you feel bad about because it's bleedover from the work situation. And I think that's why I had to step back for these last several months. I needed to figure out exactly what direction I was headed in... if any. It's very difficult to focus on losing weight, eating right, working out - if what you are REALLY concerned about is something else altogether. Resentment about being stuck in a deadend job that is frustrating for you can cause resentment in so many other areas. As far as why I'm worrying about being 50 pounds overweight when I (hopefully) start my certification program in February... For so many reasons, it is simply not acceptable to me. I know what to do, I know how to do this, and using waiting to start my new path is simply allowing myself to use another excuse, allowing myself to rationalize 7 more months away. Every once in a while, you just know the time is right to strike. Right now, I know I can do this. In 3 months, or 5, or 7, I might stumble and fall again. I've learned to take advantage of motivation when it crawls into my life. ;)

A saying I saw today.. "A goal is just a dream with a deadline." It made me smile when I read that... though I will say that for me it isn't so much a "deadline" as it is an ETA. ;) So I have dreams, and I'm making them goals, and I'll get there as soon as I can. That works for me. :D

Hello All.

Jolly: OH MY GOSH! FIVE POUNDS??

Hello All.

Jolly: OH MY GOSH! FIVE POUNDS?? Way to go, girl. I'm so proud of you and need to get my butt back to being focused. Just one of those things.

Raven: I'm so happy you are pursuing your dream. I am so excited for you!

Derry: Welcome back. Great job on staying the same.

Happy: Howdy! Here's to getting back in the swing of things.

Okay, ladies, although I've done well these past two months, it's no where near where I want to be. I've been slacking where the eating has been concerned, so that stops today. I'm tired of working out so much just to undo what I did wrong with food choices.

Surgery is next week for me. I want to have 35 pounds gone by then, which is only two more pounds. I weighed this morning at home and am up three pounds from the weekend, which isn't bad considering I'm usually up twice that much. Gosh, I'd be a heck of a lot skinnier had I not been messing up a lot.

So, my goals for this month are:

1. Lose 35 WW pounds by Wednesday, August 11th. (Surgery date) I am going to weighin at WW on Tuesday so I can have an official weight before the surgery.
2. Stick to the food plan exactly. I won't have the luxury of exercise for a couple of weeks, so I need to be extra careful with food.
3. Exercise as I can. I know it's going to be tough getting back into the swing of things once I have surgery, so I must not push myself too much.
4. Be down 40 pounds by the end of the month on WW scales. That will put me at needing to be down 7 pounds this month, and I think I can do that.

I'd love to write more, but don't really have time this morning. Be good this month and I'll check in as time permits until next Tuesday.

Happy August.

Chach

Hello ladies :coffee:

I didn't realize it had been so long since I had been here! Things are crazy, trying to fit in last minute trips and preparing for school to start Wednesday.

We went to Six Flags Kentucky Kingdom last week and had a ball. My brother had his son for a week so we took a mini vacation.

Shopping for school is finished except for supplies, waiting for a list, my brother is now divorced and came out of it pretty good, she tried to screw him but it didn't work :lol: Gary put in his notice on his second job, I'm so glad, maybe things will be a little more normal around here.

Didn't read all of the posts that I missed so I'm assuming all of you have done well on weight loss? I haven't done worth :censored: This week I have had more than one cookie and twinkie fest. I feel like a stuffed Christmas turkey. Fat, bloated, no self control. I get up everyday thinking today is going to be that day that I make all the way through without cheating. Yeah right, I haven't seen the day yet. I have no idea why I'm having such a hard time getting control over myself. I guess I will kep working on myself and go from there.

We are having a luau later this month. I can't wait. I have wanted to have one for the past few years but have not got around to it. We have beachcomber hats, grass skirts, luau decorations, the whole nine yards. I just can't wait! It will be so much fun.

Hope everyone here is doing well and being very sucessful. Have a wonderful day girls, talk to you later

Hey all. Just a quick check in. Looks like we have all found our motivation for the month. Hurray for us. Welcome back, Hippee. Glad to hear from you again. Hope things are going better for your brother and his son.

I have to finish stuff up for TOPS tomorrow. will post more tomorrow. Congrats on the workout, Raven. Slow and steady. YOu can do it. :wave:

Quickie check in - my stomach isn't upset today, which is a relief. Now my throat is sore. *sigh* Last night I decided to give myself this morning off to get in more sleep and let my abs heal because they are still sore from the pilates on *Sunday!* Tomorrow will be treadmill again, then pilates on Thu, etc. I'm starting on the Couch Potato to 5K, so we'll see how it goes.

My food isn't great because of the money *again* so it's what I can afford/scrounge up in the house. Thursday is payday, so I'll be doing my grocery shopping for the healthy stuff. I'm not eating really badly, though, just not as well as I could be.

Water hasn't been great because the thought of drinking water with an upset stomach was not appetizing at all. Hopefully today I'll be able to get back to that. Stupid virus, go away!

Chachee - Surgery is next week.. wow! Time flies.... Hang in there, girl!

Jolly - Sounds like you're back in the groove and doing fine.. good for you!

Hippy - Welcome back!!

Good morning all. I picked up some information on my gym's dietician services. I figure, right now I am losing weight with making small changes in diet, and exercising like crazy. Eventually though, this will slow down. I will have to really look at diet to get the last pounds off. So, I will have the information so I can get the help I need when I need it.

Have a great day all.

Morning girls!

Jolly, sounds like you are on a roll!

Raven, sorry to hear you have been sick. Hope you are feeling 100% soon. I have missed your motivation!

Chach, time for the surgery? Hooray for you!

Today I feel positive. I feel like I can make some wise choices instead of whinning about being fat. I had stopped drinking water all together because I have been so full of food there was just no room for water. This morning I made just a half pot of coffe instead of a whole one so I could have a few cups and move on to water. Small step but atleast I took one. It hasn't been helping matters by sleeping in but with school starting tomorrow I will be up at 5 again and hopefully that will help me get back on track.

Here's to a successful day!

Jolly, wow - 5 pounds, such excellence! :smug: I should be following you around and doing what you do and eating what you eat!!! Can you share what made you such a success this week?
Raven, well I didn't stay the same as you congratulated me for, sadly, but it was a teeny gain, only .2 when I weighed in at ww this morning. Not too bad, and I absolutely WILL lose that this coming week! I am so motivated to be back on track and stay there.
I don't know if mini rewards are for everyone, but I think I may like mini punishments too! I was thinking of challenging you all to an interesting thing. If you GAIN, why not donate $1.00 (or the equivalent in your currency) for every .2 gained to some charity? So, this week, as I have gained .2, I should donate $1.00 to a homeless shelter/food pantry/soup kitchen in a city near me. I don't have to physically SEND them that small an amount of money all the time, but I can set aside a jar in my kitchen and deposit the funds in there every time I have a gain. Hopefully, there won't be much in there, and maybe I will celebrate reaching my goal by donating a dollar for every pound I lose in the end? Might be something to think about. After all, feeding those unfortunate souls who NEED the food we might even throw out is something really good. Anyone want to join in this challenge? Anyone have any better or different ideas?
Chach, I am glad you are doing so well. I hope your surgery goes well. I forget what kind of surgery you are having, but I think it was breast reduction or something like that???? I hope it goes well and you achieve what you want to!
Don't know you yet, Hippy, but sounds like you've had a fun and wild summer and need some of that "kick butt" stuff that this thread is named for. What do you need???? I love Twinkies too, but know they are a "trigger" food for me and have to stay away!
Raven, hope you feel better. I can't stay with my "program" when I am not feeling well. Take care and you will then be better!
Red, not many posts from you, still don't know if I "beat" you this week or not. What the heck, I'll start my donation jar with a contribution of what it would cost for my favorite food (chocolate cake!) as I said I would. I feel like I should do that, anyway, as I gained.
Red, I was SO thinking of you last night. Lancelot came home and his electronic stalker "Wacky" was off the wall, pouncing on Lancelot now that he is back from vacation. Interestingly enough, Wacky was in VT on vacation, himself, but that didn't stop him from sending tons of e-mails and calling Lancelot tons of times during the day. This guy is a compulsive, obsessive nutcase that just can't go on a vacation himself without working all the time. He is probably the one who needs a vacation the most. L came home all disgusted and discouraged, exactly as you have been. He spent the entire evening online looking at job sites. Hope something comes up soon. I thought he might even walk in a resign today, things are so bad.
Time for me to tighten the belt, financially. But, I still need to be able to tighten my belt as far as another notch or two goes in my weight loss journey. How can I save money and eat right? How can I still afford my ww meetings, which are truly what keeps me going - though this web site also helps me so much as well. This is so hard, but I am so worried that we might face unemployment and have to cut costs on so many things. I just NEED my ww meetings so much, and so does my daughter. But, I kind of came to a decision overnight that I will begin to look for a part time job, I guess, for when the kids start school. I can work, but haven't wanted to as I have been a stay at home mom for a long time, and love it.
By the way, Jamie was so successful, she lost another 1.6 pounds and she is now down 5.6 and got her 5 pound ribbon today! She worked harder than I did over vacation, she deserves this! By the way, I have a "reward" set up for her at 10 pounds as well, I will pay for her to have her nails done, something she wants!
Linda

Good morning :D

First day of school here. I hate getting a new school year started. The routine changes so much over summer break and it's hard to get back into school mode.

Jolly, I hadn't caught up on previous posts. I wasn't aware that you have lost 5 pounds :o Sorry for overlooking your success. Here's to you :bravo:

Hi there Linda. I do need some kick butt attitude from the women around here. I asked Raven awhile ago to move to Kentucky and be my personal butt kicker :lol: I know that twinkies and a whole list of other foods are trigger foods for me and I know I shouldn't eat them but that doesn't mean that I don't. I have a very hard time losing weight because I have to give up all sugar and eat the South Beach Diet way to see any results. I am not a veggie eater and when I try to eat lots of veggies that I do like I get burnt out. When I try a plan that does allow potatoes, pasta and so on I'm never pleased because I want more. It's a never ending battle for me.

It's very hot and humid here today. We are having a cold front come through later and tomorrow it will be only 78. The cool down for a few days with no humidity will be welcomed by all.

:wave: to Raven, Happy, Chachee and Red.

Have a great day girls!

Good morning all. I have to laugh at myself today, in hopes of using humor to get over this slump.

I had my TOPS meeting last night. Now, I KNOW that there are differences between the scale at the meeting and the scale at the gym. I know this. But, I weighed in and only had a 3/4 pound loss. YEs, I know, a loss is a loss. But still! Before the meeting, I had told myself that if I lost more than 3 pounds at meeting, I could have whatever I wanted for SUPPER (not forever, jsut the one meal), and if I won a contest, could use that to go out to eat. Well, I did not lose 3 pounds (which is probably good since I am already going out to eat twice this week), so I just went to get the chicken I had planned for a chef salad, and some more sugar free fudgicles. But then, Viruqua struck! I decided I DESERVED more. That i had had a good week, darn it. I exercised every day. I had not binged. I had not had any candy. I was going to get my favorite chips and dip, darn it, because I deserved it!!!:stress: Well, I put it in my cart. Then got the rest of what I needed. Then I looked at the calories in that chips and dip. So, fine, I would have my favorite pretzels. Looked at the calories in that. Put all back, and got some light pringles. I had some of them with my salad, and I was so overstuffed. I couldn't believe it. I used to eat a chef salad, a whole baguette, plus dessert, and not be as stuffed as I felt last night.

I steal feel bad. I feel all "fatandugly" today. Which is totally stupid. I had a loss. I am going down. I will, with good planning, be in the 30's next week. I can do this. Throwing an Oompah Loompah sized temper tantrum will not help this. But that is how I feel. Frumpy. Even though, I am wearing my plum colored outfit, and my hair is looking good, thanks to expensive product.

So, send some kicks, positives, anything. I NEED HELP!!!

Hello lovely ladies!

MIA yesterday, as work is hella busy. Why is it that things always happen right before you are set to have some time off?

Anyway, I missed catching up on posts, so here I go....

Jolly: Girl, please don't beat yourself up. I'm not going to kick you in the butt also. Remember how huge of a loss you had earlier this week, and you have to give your body some time to adjust. Plateaus happen and there is nothing you can do about it. It's a tough lesson that I am learning very fast. I've kinda plateaued this last month and a half. Funny thing is that I know I'm doing everything right, I just need to give my body some time to catch up. It will, eventually, so I'm not so worried about it. I feel better, look better and live better now than I did last year at this point, so good for me.

Raven: Yep, one week from today I will be in surgery. I can't believe it's really happening. Just so darned excited about the entire thing. Try to do well, in spite of the finances being tight. I know how that goes.

Hippy: Good to see you again. Welcome back. Your luau sounds like fun. I know the stuffed feeling and it's something you will overcome. Just takes some time to get back on track.

Derry: I'm glad to hear your daughter is doing so well. Must make you so proud of her, huh? I remember when she was first thinking about attending WW meetings with you. As far as the donation thing goes, I did something like that about two years ago. I put $1 in my basket for each pound lost, then if I gained, then I had to double what I put in there. So, if I gained 2 pounds in a week, I'd put in $4. It ended up being a good chunk of change--right around $100 and I used that to buy yarn to knit scarves to donate to the abused women and children's shelter up here. I think I donated right around 80 scarves. It was nice.

Okay, weigh in for me tonight. Hoping to get over this slump I'm in. My mom isn't going to attend with me, I don't think. It's her choice, so that is fine with me. A little disappointing, but it's okay. I'll just have to check in here once I'm all healed and let you all know how it went.

Talk to you all later.

Chach

Jolly, congrats on the great weigh in for the week! Also to you Chachee - 60 pounds so far, you have done really fabulous. Good luck with the surgery next week, will be thinking of you and sending some prayers that everything goes well for you. You will be feeling light as a feather no doubt!

Jolly, I think we all have "fatNugly" days - it's especially bad when you think you're looking pretty good and then you catch a glimpse in a window or something and it takes all the wind out of your sales. That happened to me this weekend. I went shopping for an interview suit and just walking in the store I approached a support column that had a mirror on it. I'm such an expert at avoiding my reflection. But as I approached the mirror - this feeling of profound sadness overwhelmed me - from the top of my head to the tips of my toes. And i said to myself that I need to bottle that for motivation rather than letting it make me feel even uglier and bigger. Keep up the good work on your food and exercise, hold your head high and know you are a goddess in a purple outfit with fabulous hair, and nothing less. Keep reminding yourself of the changes like you did with the portions on your meal the other night - keep the good things in the forefront of your mind because the bad side will be looking for any excuse to cave in as you well know. I keep saying to myself that I am past the worst point of my life and will never go there again. Every day - slow but surely is a few steps in the other direction. And there are many things to lure me back the wrong way but I won't listen to them.

I've been eating decently and riding my bike every day. I'm going to count my successful days and not measure by the scale. I can tell I'm eating better as I am also not as achy as I was before - I think I have a bigger problem with sugar than just extra calories. Just like you Hippy, I do better with a low carb/ diabetes type diet. But unlike you, I really like veggies alot thank goodness because I can see how that would complicate your diet if you didn't. I think they've gone way overboard on the carb food items. I still stand by my diet plan of natural foods and avoid the processed stuff.

Linda, good luck with the belt tightening program. My company got bought out and my job is going away the end of next month as they close our office. We too are reviewing the "how can we trim expenses" thing. I know the WW meetings are very motivational - especially if you have a good leader but what do you like best about them? Perhaps we can help. TOPS, tho not specific diet plan focused is also cheaper than WW. But I think the best part of the meetings is having a good group that motivates you. I've had some good leaders and some real duds. Anyway, I hope your husband finds a decent replacement job soon.

Raven, I hope you are feeling better and back on the upswing again. That's great that you have found something horse related that you can turn into a reality for yourself. You go girl!

Red :grouphug: can I ask without offending why it is that you stay in Japan? As you say the culture is different, you compare yourself to people whose body structure is far different than yours, whose values are very different and on top of it you are treated as the orphan stepchild on the work arena? I'm sure you are very proficient in the language but is there nothing else you can do instead? Just seems like everywhere you turn something is bringing you down in your environment. Not conducive to success, is it? Kind of how I imagine I'd feel if I was to move to sunny southern California, land of plastic people. Or even a dot com or advertising job out here where the office was filled with 20 somethings and their low rise skirts, pierced belly buttons and thong underwear. I think I'd be feeling lower than pond scum after 2 months. Just curious, like I said, didn't mean to offend.

Guess I've taken up enough time for tonight. Send some good vibes my way if you will please - I have an interview tomorrow. It's about an hour's drive, I sure hope I don't get lost, I am nervous about being "judged" and not feeling my best in the looks department. I wish some rich very old person would adopt me ;) :D 'nigh all...

Hey people. I'm here, just been out of it. Will be posting soon. Just wanted to say sorry Derry for not reporting on the Dare. I was down only 200 grams! Heh, it's better than nothing. So I guess you could say I beat you but. . .

Like I said, will be writing soon. Hang in there jolly, no ugly days, just misperceptions. heh, happy, no sadness at reflections, will you, girl?! Smile when you see that wonderful person, always!!

Ok, people, let's see if I can wade through all the posts, but quickly. Got a date with the gym.

*****

Chachee -- you must be psyched with the surgery coming off, well, I don't know, psyched yet anxious, no? I sure would be. Well, I certainly hope all goes well. Good luck with your weight goal. In any case, the time after surgery will be rough, with exercise reduced I suppose. But you can still walk, right? Yes, and a happy August to you too. My birthday is Sunday (the 8th). Planning to goof off work, get more horse in and no doubt a fair amount of beer. I celebrate birthdays no matter how old I get. Everyone else here is hush hush about them. But I love 'em. Heck, it means you're alive, right?!

hippy -- there you are! yes, we've missed you. sounds like you've been busy. cookie and twinkie fests, oh no!! I could show you up for sure with the amounts I can shovel in. I just keep the stuff out of the house, it's bad enough when I get on a binge and make multiple runs to the convenience stores. But I refuse to allow myself bags of stuff or more than single portions of ice cream. I know there is no stopping me once started. Can you say, steam train running down the track!?! Heh, luau sounds fun. Is this another thing I'm out of the loop about? Are luaus a fad in the States now or something.

Well, hang in there, hip, and I hope you get yourself under control soon. Tell me, what are you thinking when you're out of control? Maybe us shrinks can help you out.

Ok, see the next post. Small steps are good steps too. Good for you for taking action on the water. It helps to get it in. I've learned that very often when I was just too hot or too thirsty that I would eat instead. Now I drink water constantly and try to cool off instead of eating ice cream or drinking juice. I also notice that the good foods really curb the eating. So, instead of saying, no sweets etc, I've been saying, first the apple, first the brown rice, first the veggies and THEN you can have the other. I find that more often than not I don't want the other or it will not result in a binge. If I just look at the calories and say, better a candy bar than a bowl of rice AND a candy bar, it's very hard to stop at JUST a candy bar.

****

Ok, sorry, I must get a move on it. It's already after 3:30. Raven, Derry, jolly, thanks for all your support. I will be writing to you tonight when I get back from the gym. You're the best!

Good morning :coffee:

Red, you are so funny! I don't know if a luau is the thing in the states but we just thought it would be fun. I guess for me it has alot to do with missing the ocean and beach and so on when we come back from vacation. I love it on the beach and to be honest I would pack up and move to the coast in a heartbeat if that were possible. Okay, you asked what I'm thinking when I'm out of control? Well, here I go, hope you are ready :lol: It starts by me thinking about being tired of forceing myself to eat healthy stuff that I really don't like. How I am tired of not eating what I like and watching people around me eat anything they want. How I have to give up all sugars and go low carb to see results, back to eating stuff I don't really like. How I want to be thin but feel like I'm suffocating in fat because I can't seem to find anything that works for me that I can stick to. How I'm sooooo tired of buying fat clothes, sooooo tired of looking in the mirror and seeing a fat person. Looking at pictures of myself and SEEING myself for what I am. Why I can't eat 1 cookie or 1 slice of pizza and not eat anymore. Why I let myself get out of control, why I don't jump in and take control of myself. WOW! Didn't know you were dealing with a dieting psycho did you :lol: I often wonder when I'm having a junk food fest why I'm sitting there eating that crap when Sometimes I get to the point of tears because I feel a strong desire to be thin. Does any of this make sense to you? Anyway, those are my thoughts. What's your diagnosis doc?

Alrighty then! I feel better getting all of that off my chest so off to happier things!

Chach, 60 pounds? YOU ROCK!!!!!! I'm still thinking about WW but am not sure that I can control portions. I have heard so many people say it helps to control yourself because you want to show a loss at the meetings. I can see that being true.

Raven, Jolly, Happy, Linda, hope all of you are well. Have a good day ladies!

Good morning all. Thanks for all the support. I really appreciate having you guys here to talk to. And things really did get better after venting. I got together with a girlfriend I haven't seen in awhile, and she said she almost didn't recognize me - with the smile, the clothes, the hair, and the makeup! What a great compliment. We went out for Mexican food. I did use quite a few calories on wine and a margeritta, but actually was able to sit there with food in front of me (chips and salsa), and had a couple, but didn't have my hand continually in the bucket. And brought a lot of it home for supper tonight. We had a great time. Of course, I stayed out past my bedtime, and ended up doing a much shorter workout this morning than intended, and am now enjoying a "second breakfast" of a bagel. I will make up for these sins. So thanks again for the support and being here.

Hippee, my thoughts are with you. I know what you are talking about, and how easy it is to slip into binge mode, when you feel like this all sucks. It is all about perception, and how you choose to see things. But it takes a lot of time to make that perception change permenant. Hang in there.

Everyone, have a wonderful day. :wave:

Hey chickies... busy as all get out at work, very little time to post. I was going to sit down and spend a few minutes here last night from home, but crap happens, yaknow?

I ended up being at the stables very late because my sweet horsie decided to have many blonde moments, and one of them ended up getting his face slashed open. Vet call, he's on another one, doesn't get to the barn till midnight and stitches up said horsie. Six pretty stitches on his face to make him look normal again. Got home around 1, ate a hotdog, couldn't care LESS about food, woke up at around 6 or so no time to work out, barely time to get to work - was late anyway. And I'm *tired* :tired: today. Just very, very grateful that my boy's cut was cosmetic, and didn't tear into anything important. He's fine, we're fine... now I need a nap. I'll try to catch up later... but it might be this weekend before I really get a chance. Work is keeping me really hopping, and I am enjoying the heck out of having a trainer at this barn I can actually learn from.

Jolly .. please... send me one of those margueritas?? Please?

Hi Ladies,

This will probably be my last post, unless something else happens. Work has turned chaotic with them finally realizing I'm going to be gone for two weeks, plus limited with what I can do once I return.

I've got to call the doctor, as the cold has settled in my lungs, where I am weak due to asthma, and it's burning. Time to call in the antibiotics. Get it taken care of pronto!

I was down 0.8 of the 1 pound gain I showed last week, so it's good. I plan on going next Tuesday night to get my weight recorded before sugery.

I'm excited and a bit nervous, but not all that bad. Just so happy it's finally going to happen.

I wish everyone the best of luck the next week or so while I'm out of commission. Be good to not only everyone else, but to yourselves. You all are amazing, and don't let something like the little scale dictate who you are as a person. Use it as a measuring tool, not a controlling tool!

Happy Un-boob job to me!

Chach

Good luck Chachee with surgery and healing and all that goes along with it. Will keep you in my prayers for a speedy recovery... :angel:

Hi guys! Yeah, I could get on the computer now! My kids have monopolized my computer lately and I'm "odd man out"!
Chach, I was thinking about how much progress Jamie has made when you reminded me of how I was trying to get her to go to ww and to the doctor. It's made such a huge difference in her. She is looking great, thanks for remembering!
Hippy, just curious as you sound like such a carb lover as to why you would choose So. Beach as your diet of choice? Maybe another program that does allow carbs would make you happier and more successful? I love my pasta, potatoes and the like, can't live without them, especially breads! Low carb breads seem like a "shadow" of the real thing and don't make me feel full. I can watch my sugar and the really "bad" carbs, though. Maybe a change in program would give you more results in the end, with the more happiness in terms of what you are eating? When I feel deprived, I am totally unhappy.
Jolly, I think you are being way too hard on yourself. You lost weight, congratulations!!!! You ended up making a better food choice, celebrate that victory, don't get down on yourself. Passing up the chips, dip and pretzels sounds to me like you are totally working at it! Tell me what kind of outfit that purple outfit is and what you did with your hair recently. If you mentioned it before, I've forgotten. Have no brain cells left..... I totally need a new outfit! Been thinking about coloring my hair as well.... it's good to think about changing yourself. Remember my make over ideas? I still need to work on that!
Happy2bme, sorry to read about YOUR job situation. I can look into TOPS, you are right. I haven't seen a thing about a meeting local to me, so far, though. I was thinking (in one of my tossing and turning and not sleeping moments) that I could really get my "rear in gear" and get back to goal weight and then maybe solve two problems - I could actually WORK for WW, making money and NOT having to pay to be at the meetings, etc. Wonder if that will help with my motivational issues? I think i have something like 14 or 15 pounds left to go until I hit goal weight again.... I totally COULD do it.
Also, Jamie is doing so well that perhaps she'll hit goal too and then not have to pay. I was so proud of her yesterday, she resisited a Hersey Bar that was 6 points! Way to go! She went to the place where her band rehearses and they have candy for sale. She ALWAYS has candy there and this is the first week she hasn't. She had a diet coke instead and came home very proud of her new resolve! She'll probably hit goal before I do!
Happy made some sense, Red, in terms of suggesting you "move on" and get yourself out of that environment that only seems to make you feel badly about yourself. No offense intended from me either, just caring people trying to help you with brainstorming, etc. I think you are quite valuable to the Japanese as some kind of translator, right? But, I wonder if you could translate here in the states from English to Japanese in some capacity? Gosh, so many US companies do business in Japan, they are probably looking for someone with your marvelous skills!
Hi to everyone else!
Chach, best wishes with your surgery. I hope you get that cold cleared up, though, as they might not wish to put you under.....we'll be thinking of your and have TONS of wonderful success stories, right guys???
By the way, made ww chili last night, 2 points for a one cup serving, a taco with it was 3 points - great filling meal for only 5 points!!!!
Linda

Good morning. Friday here. Usually this is more like a Monday to me because I have shifts at the newspaper but I plan to take a couple days off (despite it meaning no pay) for my birthday. Sorry I didn't get to write last night. Had a great workout at the gym, then came home and made a big salad and that was it as it was already late. It felt so good to really get down to a good, hard workout. That was the first time in a week and though I went the day before I just did some light weights, no cardio and left. Today I'm already feeling it (could be from the day before as well) and it feels good. Also had a good workout from riding yesterday.

I was good with the foods yesterday, no bingeing, no sugar. I realized just what a lot of muscle I have and what a lot of exercise I do, and somehow yesterday something clicked and I said, OK, keep doing this. It's you. When I'm at the gym and meeting people like me who work out hard and love it I feel motivated and happily doing what I do. But get me away from the gym and I lose sight of that. So, I'm going to just try to keep a hold of that idea of myself.

Not really making sense here I think, too much coffee. OK, over to you all. . .

Oh, just remembered, I was awakened with a jolt last night/this morning just before 3:30 a.m. Earthquake. I'm a very light sleeper and tremors have me leaping to my feet (sleep on a futon) and to the door always, not really knowing where I'd go anywhere but thinking I should get some shoes on. Of course, if the big one hits there'll probably be no building. Like the Kobe quake it just went, bang! no warning and killed most people in their sleep. Oh, well, no sense thinking about it. Any of you in quake zones? Last night's was only a 3 on the scale of 1 to 6 the Japanese have. That's nothing. I've felt 5s before. Depending on if they're kind of a horizontal shaking or an up and down movement it makes a big difference. The vertical ones are really scary.

****

hippy -- oh, a luau sounds like fun and what a great attitude of yours to make something you love because you miss it instead of just sitting around missing it. Oh, man, you're no diet psycho. This is so normal amongst people who can shovel it in (excuse my blunt language. I speak from experience!) I don't do it much anymore but I used to and I sure COULD do it again. It's a personality thing, concentrated, efficient. Just think of what these traits mean in another context. We're intense types and remember eating is essential for survival. Back when your ancestors were sitting around in caves and someone came across a dead wooly mammoth that needed to be eaten NOW, do you think your ancestors were the ones who said, "oh, gosh, I'm full from those berries I had earlier. Can't eat another bite or I'll just burst!" or do you think they were the ones who just got down to business, packing it in like there was no tomorrow because heck, there would have been no tomorrow if they didn't have the fat stores to get through to the next wooly mammoth a month down the road.

So, what I'm saying is, I figure we overeating types are just suffering the consequences of a changing world -- wooly mammoths at our feet 24 hours a day! You're going to have to accept the fact that you are an ultra-efficient machine, everything about you, your mind, your body. So, accept it with pride and then deal with it in a way that is going to make yourself proud of yourself.

I used to live in India, out in the sticks and I was fat then. It was nothing unusual to see people who were starving, and I was looked at with awe. People would comment on my rolls with the utmost admiration. I'm not kidding. They knew the importance of having those fat stores, at least in their environment, their situation.

So first of all, accept that you're never going to be like the others who can eat and eat and not gain weight. But they have no choice. You DO!

And as far as the control goes, that's just another aspect of it. Like I said, I KNOW without a shadow of a doubt that I simply cannot control myself once I get a taste for something if there's more of it sitting in front of me. So I don't allow it in front of me. If I really want to eat something I buy just a bit or give the rest away, immediately, before I have time to think that I want to eat it all by myself!

I hear you with the tears and the being sick of being fat. I was there. I was so there, all through my teens and it was horrible and I hated myself. When I came to Japan I went to a bodybuilding gym by accident, it was in the neighborhood and I met people who took the emotion out of what they saw in the mirror. They saw their bodies as a canvas to work on, a lump of clay waiting to be molded and something clicked. The fat, muscle or lack of it had nothing to do with the person. It just WAS and it was something to manipulate. But each person is different. I can look at a weight and pack on the muscle. These guys here would work out and work out and get nothing. They were so jealous of me. That was probably a big thing that helped. For the first time, my ability to eat, to put on muscle (if I worked out) was seen as a strength instead of a weakness. It's also my outlet now. If I don't work out I would have to eat about 80 percent less than I do to maintain this weight.

So, my bottom line advice is to learn to see yourself not as some out-of-control psycho but as a body with a mission, survival. And that's what fuels your mega-eateing. The body doesn't think, it just IS and it's trying its darndest to protect you. Take it aside, rock it/you in your arms and say, honey, you're going to be ok. And THEN, throw away the key to the cookie cupboard!

jolly -- I'd say as well, you've got some major saves there. You're doing so well. Stop looking at the things you call "sins" so much. Look at the big picture. It looks good to me.

Raven -- glad the horse is OK. How did he cut his face open. And what do you mean by "blonde" moments? Is your horse a palamino? Well, hope you find some downtime today. I'm sending you energy.

Chachee -- good luck with the surgery. Isn't that just like things, people not waking up to the fact that you'll not be there until the last moment and then panicking and making things tough on you too. Hope to hear from you soon with a good report!

happy, derry -- no offense taken with the suggestions that I should move my rear outta here! I've thought of it often. The truth of it is that there are a lot of things I like about here, but the things I don't like are the ones that have to do with things like body type and such, which is something that comes up here. Japan is an extremely homogenous society. It's one way and not many other ways. So, if you're not one of the vast majority, you feel it. The U.S. is the opposite. But there are a lot of things I like about here that the U.S. doesn't have I guess. Really, when it comes down to it, I just have to change my way of looking at things. There will always be something I can choose to dislike, feel differently about than the people I'm around. I've lived in a lot of countries and some very different cultures, but I've found that the values that matter are really the same all over. As far as my work goes, that's just a few people who have made a company. I've allowed it to become too big a part of my world. And that is definitely something I can do something about.

Well, I didn't get time to talk to you individually more. But I just want to say thanks for your support Derry and happy. It means a lot.

Gotta run now. Ciao!

Hey all, real quick post. Happy, how did the job interview go? Derry, the hair cut is short and sassy - a very modified shaggy bob sort of thing, with lighter blonde highlights. The outfit is a maroon/plum pants with a striped tank top. Actually looks pretty good.

I went to Merle NOrman tonight and got a makeover. Really brightened up my makeup - no more camoflauge for me. Pinks. Again with the pinks. I bought the lipstick and gloss there, just because it is so much brighter than I am used to that I knew if I tried to match it elsewhere, I either would be way off or chicken out. I matched the rest with Maybelline. Expensive day, but I am happy. Now will see how i do tomorrow.

I let myself get too hungry, and my sandwich spoiled, and went to Old Country Buffet for lunch. I didn't eat as much as I would have, but still way more than I needed. The ONLY good thing (other than eating less than I HAVE in the past) is that I am listeneing to my body now, and not having any dinner. I am off to do part of my grocery shopping, then to bed.

Have a great one all.

He everyone!
Red, keep on track at the gym, sounds like it's keeping you "centered"! Though I get sore from my work outs, I call it a "good sore" feeling. It makes you feel powerful!
We don't live in a quake zone but have occasional earthquakes here in New Hampshire. We had one a few years ago that was 4.5 and I thought there was an explosion nearby or something. Didn't know it was an earthquake until hearing about it later. There was a vibration, sort of, and I happened to be on line and the computer monitor rocked a bit, and there was an accompanying rumble sound that made me think of an explosion.
I woud hate to live in CA near some of the major faults. As lovely as the climate is out there, I don't think I could live with the feeling that "the big one" might come any day or any time. However, that is not unlike the fear we all have of terrorism nowadays, one could go anywhere and something could happen I guess? I have a hard time dealing with the concept of people hating so much that they want to kill nameless people just becuase of where they live, not knowing who they are or what they believe. Talk abut emotional eating, I swear most of my re-gained weight was after 9/11, I just couldn't deal. Love that mammoth remark, Red, you are SO right. I often feel that we are all trying to be so civilized, us humans, but we still have very primal feelings. For example, I started grinding my teeth after 9/11 in my sleep, having never done that before. I did it so hard that I actually broke a tooth! I told my dentist that I thought I was responding to some primal instinct to sharpen my teeth for "war" and I think he thought I was absolutely bonkers!
Jolly, I think the luau (sp?) is a great thing as well. We can MAKE anything we want happen if we set our minds to it. If you miss the ocean and want to create an experience or environment to please yourself, you go girl! You are really doing so well, don't let a setback get you down!
I am hoping today will be a better day for my 16 year old son. He's on antidepressants and had a very bad night last night. I almost dragged him to the emergency room as I was so worried. I keep wanting to hover over him like I did when my kids were infants and had a cold or something, but he is almost all grown up and he ordered me to leave him alone last night.
Today, I face facts that he is still as depressed as he was last night, I will get him to some kind of treatment today. Wish me luck!
Linda

Morning gals :D

It's a beautiful morning here.

First off, Linda, I hope your son is okay. You must be worried to death. I hope all goes well. You asked why I chose SB since I like carbs. That is the only plan I have ever found that I am able to lose weight. I see results, have energy and feel wonderful when I follow it. I don't crave sweets and so on but I do suffer major burn out.

Red, you have some very valid points. Thank you so much for your input. We had a quake here last summer. We live along a fault line but it was the first one that we ever really felt. It sounded like something exploded and the shaking started. It was a 5 on the rictor scale and I don't want to feel one any stronger :lol:

Raven, Jolly, Happy, good morning to allof you!

Off to the bank and grocery and so on. Have a wonderful day!

Good morning all. Derry, good luck with your son. I hope all goes well, and he starts feeling better.

I had a good workout this morning. Then, had a NSV afterwards. I was very hungry after working out. I had some apples in my bag. No lunch, as I am meeting up with a friend. I stopped at the store by habit. Was looking for some cheese, or something very healthy. The "healthy" started slipping. i realized what I was doing, and that, I would probably feel fine if I had an apple and some liquids. LEft the store without buying anything except a paper. It was a good feeling. In control. And I was right, I feel fine with just the apple.

I had an interesting talk with a friend of mine last night. She said that the coolest thing for her has been the fact that I am actually taking care of myself. Not like I was one of the great unwashed before, but I am not hiding behind my fat and trying to camoflauge. I am trying to do the best I can for myself in every way, and to really celebrate myself.

Have a wonderful day all.

Hey ladies...


Chach - I hope and pray everything goes well for you! I'll be anxiously awaiting your update! With bells on and everything.

Jolly – It makes me smile to read your posts. I love the way you’re changing your perspectives and working to make things happen. And your posts help me.. today I was heading out to go get taco bell for lunch. Again. I had read your posts before I left, and on my way, I thought about it, and realized I really didn’t *want* taco bell. I was going to eat it because I was tired, and feeling down, and I realized that eating there would only compound the problem, not help resolve it. So I went to the grocery store and got Healthy Choice lunches, and my fruit, and yogurt for my snack. And felt much more at ease about it than if I’d eaten junk. Financially AND physically!

Red – You seem to be feeling better than you were the other day, I’m glad to see that. I don’t meet many women who are built like I am, so it’s very interesting to read your mental noodlings. I may not be able to reply to them all the time, but they are fascinating to me. I’m trying to remember how old I was when I truly accepted that I was never going to be “small.” Not just not overweight, but slender, delicate… petite? It’s something I am glad I finally accepted because it’s helping me to try to get my daughter to accept herself too. She inherited the big bones and massive muscles from both sides of her family, and it’s difficult for her. Add being 30 pounds or so overweight on top of that, and you have a recipe for a self esteem meltdown. I’m working hard to encourage her to see the positives, the beauty, the strength in her, rather than the so-called “negatives.” Thank you for posting the stuff you do, because you remind me I’m not alone.

Derry – If you don’t mind my asking… why is your son on antidepressants? I really hope he can find his way out of his unhappiness.

I’m sorry if I’m missing people.. running short of time, as usual.

For me, this week has been some victories and some failings. After Arashi’s accident, I was so tired the next day and day after I fell down on the exercise and the food. Today, I didn’t get up early enough to exercise, but I did reel myself back in on the food issue. And TGIF, that will give me time to get my sleep back in line. I also bought myself some of the good vitamins, which I’ve been out of for a while. They make a difference for me, I know.

Red – You asked about how Arashi hurt himself. I was training him in the round pen, and it was his first time. Some horses move off fine, but some don’t, and he’s not a mover. It was taking a lot of pressure to get him to move off, and that made him anxious enough to try to bull his way out of the round pen. He was sticking his nose through the bars and whatnot, and he found the only #*$!@% weld that was sharp enough to cut. When he pulled his face back, it acted as a knife and sliced his face open. Messy. We all went over the round pen *AGAIN* to see if we missed anything else. I sure hope that was it. He’s not a palomino, he’s a cremello… which is palomino times two. Did you see the picture I posted of him and me? I’ll toss it up here again so you can admire the pony. ;)

Tomorrow I’ll get on that treadmill again. I’m feeling good, just tired.

Hey all. Raven, I am glad my ramblings help. Way to go on the save at lunch. You can do it.

I have a couple more NSVs to report. I went out to lunch with a friend. We went to this Italian buffet. I had a large salad, and slice of garlic bread. I went back up once more, and got another large salad, and two slices of pizza. I ate part of the salad, and a couple bites out of each slice, and realized I was full. I covered the rest up, and stopped eating. It felt really good to realize I was full, before I had licked several plates clean and was in a carb induced coma. Then, I decided to give myself what I hoped would be an esteem boost. I stopped at Target, and tried on pants. I was able to fit into a size 18. Not so well that I would want to wear them publicly, but I was able to get them zipped without a struggle. Hurray. I came home, and tried on a pair of 18 jeans I had lurking in the closet. I got them up easily, and buttoned, but couldn't get them zipped. But hey, a few more pounds and who knows?

Have a great weekend all.

Good morning everyone. It's getting late here and I want to get to the gym but I do want to get something out to you all. Sure enough, the posts were building up but I didn't realize it because I wasn't getting email notifications. This happens because when I go into work I check in there but because I'm not logged on it doesn't register that I've visited and so thinks the last notice hasn't been seen yet. Ok, do you really need to know all this. This babbling is the result of a mega caffeine influx coupled with being a fast typer. Motor mouth meet motor fingers.

Weight was down this morning! Hurrah, hurrah. I've switched to weighing the very first thing in the morning so can't really compare to the recent weights. But the previous day I'd done the same and it was down from that so I guess I'm down a touch. Legs are pumped though because I did a real heavy workout last night. I was squatting 220 lbs at 10 reps. It's starting to feel easy. Before I needed to get a really good spotter just to keep me focused but last night I practically did it alone. However, I did have an audience of a few guys who are very appreciative of strong women so that was a major boost. And I was on a Starbucks jolt and was so angry from a lousy day at work that I was throwing all my frustration into the weights. It's a great thing, that. I really wish I had a squat rack at the office! I get an adrenalin rush from getting so ticked at the goings on but I have nowhere to put it and so just usually shoot off my mouth. Not looking good for holding onto the job.

Foodwise, I had a few no-nos but, seeing as I couldn't find a beer buddy it was a lot less than if I'd hit the pubs and I walked 50 mins. home after working out. I brought my lunch in to work, brown rice and vegetable curry and kept the snacking down to . . .well, less than normal.

Ok, over to you. . .

********

Raven -- I'm really sorry I keep asking about Arashi. I know you've told me he's a cremello many times and I keep forgetting. It's not a color I remember on my own and then when you say it, I go, "Oh yeah, she's told me that before!" That was a very close call I'd say with the accident. He could have easily injured his eye. No wonder you're exhausted. Scares like that take a lot out of you. Good luck getting onto the treadmill again soon and glad to hear you're feeling better.

Also glad to hear that my posts do somebody some good other than me and getting things off my chest. Yes, accepting who we are, first perhaps LEARNING who we are is crucial. And often it's probably a case of ugly-duck syndrome. If we're around people like us or people who, though different, can like us for who we are, then it's a major boost, a fuel instead of a drain. And not just the body image. It's sad how more often than not people block others because of jealousy or fear of being different or being seen with someone who is different than the norm even when that "norm" is just some little clique of friends or co-workers.

Raven, I am feeling better and I really thank you for your concern. The other day when you wrote that you wanted to reach through the monitor and give me a hug I got all teary eyed. I'm getting teary eyed again remembering that now. I'm feeling better because I've been going to the gym and taking advantage of the guys there who admire my strength (taking advantage of men, huh?!?!) and trying my hardest to not let the people at work who are blatantly rejecting my abilities and desire to do something more challenging get to me too much. That is hard and even last night after a good workout I came home and cried at the frustration I had felt at work all day. I mean, after all, it was that frustration that partially fueled my workout.

But this morning I feel better because I'm trying to wrap my mind around the fact (and keep it wrapped!) that there are people who support me and people who, not only don't support me, but would harm me. I have always had a problem with this concept because I just cannot understand the vindictive personality. I was always the dog, faithful, ready to please, who looked at someone who struck her with hurtful shock and utter sadness. Slowly I built up the anger but kept it inside, turning it on myself. It's only now (and I'll be 45 tomorrow) that I've started to try to dissipate that anger and if I do anything with it, turn it in to love of myself and a conviction to protect myself WHILE not striking back. You, Raven, sound very similar, and if your daughter has someone like you on her side then she is way, way ahead of the game.

****

Heh, I must get out the door now if I'm going to get to the gym and be able to do anything meaningful. I will be back to talk to you all later. Derry, hippy, jolly, happy, lurkers of like mind, I wish you all a great weekend. I'll be back. Ciao belli!

Raven, just saw the picture of Arashi. I can see the color very well here. Thanks!

Happy Birthday Red
:hb: :balloons: :cheers: toasting you with a protein smoothie and low carb cake. Hi fat balloons tho :rofl: Here's to a fabulous year for you starting with today!

Glad to hear you are smiling at the scale too. I agree that life stinks, take your aggression out on the weights. Use that oof-duh to push that bar even farther. No matter what, someone is not going to like what you do. Don't give people permission to treat you like a doormat and don't give them permission to allow you to feel inadequate about yourself. After all, I like you and my opinion is the only one that matters, right? ;) - ha ha, made you smile :D Seriously, the way I look at it, we all have something to contribute in this world - be it good or bad. Be honest, be true to yourself - that's what matters.

Interview went well yesterday, thanks for asking. I think I had a good fit with personality and experience. It's a bit farther than I'd like to have to drive - especially with our winters but you can't be picky any more. We'll see if I get selected for a second interview. I also have another interview on the 23rd.

Jolly, you are doing fantastic with the mindset changes. Keep up the good work. Your new haircut sounds really cute too.

Raven, I'm sorry to hear about your poor pony. As you said, leave it to fate to find that one single sharp spot. Hope he heals quickly and that it doesn't distract you from getting back in the swing of things again.

3 times I've been in California - Los Angeles and San Franscisco when an earthquake hit - nothing big by the native standards but enough to unnerve me. I did miss the one we had here a few weeks ago - I was up at the time but didn't notice it - perhaps because it was a loud bang and the kids down the street have been blowing fireworks for the last 2 months. They are still shooting them off occasionally :rolleyes: I guess we live right over one of the biggest fault lines in the country - it's just not as active as the west coast. I hear that in New Zealand and Japan there are pretty commonplace. I guess you adjust to it as we do with tornadoes here. Actually it's those 30 foot wall of water tsunami's I'd be terrified of :yikes:

Hippy, I am right there with you on South Beach - it works better, I feel better and I don't know why I can't stick with it. I am a carb addict too I guess. *** sigh ***

Linda I hope you find some help some way for your son. That must be both scary and hard for you at the same time. They say that teens have so much more on their minds than we did growing up. I totally understand your fears after 9/11 - I felt the same - can't ever look at things with the same eyes again.

Chachee, sending you the good vibes for the upcoming week.

Can you believe we're one week down in August already? Summer is almost over :cry: I swear the time just zooms by... At least we're having another delightful weather weekend to enjoy. Hope you do too!

Good morning all. Red - Happy Birthday! I hope you do something nice for yourself today. Happy, I am glad the interview went well, and I hope something wonderful works out soon. Is it computer stuff that you might be allowed to work from home some days out of the week?? Just a thought. Everyone else, a wonderful good morning too you.

I have a busy day. Gym, golf, barn, movie. Stopping at a farmer's market this morning in hopes of finding some good stuff. Have a great day, everyone, and check in later.

Good morning!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR RED, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!! My gift to you is you not having to hear me sing that :lol: BAAAAAAD singer :lol:

Jolly, won't be long and you will be prancing around in those size 18's. Good for you!

Raven, I just reread some posts because I missed the one about your horse having to have stitches. Glad to hear he is okay and I'm sorry for not commenting about it sooner. I know how muchyou love him!

Happy, I have no idea why that plan is so hard because it does truely take away my cravings. Sometimes I think it's due to my own bullheadedness. Have you ever checked into The Zone plan? I haven't but I heard someone say it's along the lines of SB but a little more linient on when you can have fruit and other things. I thought about buying the book but I need another dieting book like I need a hole in the head :lol:

Me and and friend of mine are going shopping today for some luau decorations. We plan to have lunch and I plan to have no chips and salsa and will have a taco salad but won't eat the shell. Better run, wishing all a great day!

I thought about buying the book but I need another dieting book like I need a hole in the head :lol:

Boy, isn't that the truth! :rofl: I dragged my feet about buying South Beach for a long time - finally used up a gift certificate for that. And I just recently broke down and got Dr. Phil's FIRST book - I'm probably the last on the planet. I swear from now on, if I'm interested in something, I'll check it out at the library. Of course I have Bob Green, Body for Life, Dr. Phil, Atkins, South Beach, WW - and I'm still a tub - what does that tell you? That I'm not willing to stop eating the stuff I like! :rollpin: I'm not a huge soda drinker, I don't touch the candy and cookies and cakes hardly at all. BUT I do like the bread and pasta and pizza and I've become addicted to Edy's Grand Light 50/50 flavor ice cream. Just that particular flavor though.

I think it will help a bit going back to a regular type of job. Working from home is fabulous but there are down sides too. I will definitely be moving around more - a lot more. And I will plan my meals better because I'll be taking lunches and if I don't plan breakfast, I won't get any. I'm sure my days of being able to work from home are over with. It's probably back to management again and all the fun stuff that goes along with that :rolleyes:

Looks like it's going to be another gorgeous weekend weather wise. Hope you all enjoy yourselves, I will after I get the junk (cleaning, cooking, laundry) out of the way.

Well, just typed this LONG response and my computer went nuts and I lost it all... don't you just hate when things like that happen!
Now, I am almost out of time.
Let's just say, for now, that things are going a bit better with my son.
Raven, I don't mind you asking, at all, why he is on antidepressants. He's been depressed for a long time, mostly since we moved in December. He's having a hard time adjusting and misses his old friends and hasn't made many new ones. His band broke up, and he loved them and the music. It's been hard. Then, a girl.... we all have "been there" with the teen romance stuff, etc. He confided that he's had thoughts of suicide and I got him help. He's seeing the doctor on Monday and I think we'll start therapy for him, or he may even go into a mental health facility for a period of time. We need to help him.
Have so much of your posts to read and respond to, but not time.... will get on track with this tomorrow.
Linda :(

Everybody, thank you SO much for the birthday wishes!! It was so sweet of you and really made my day.

Hope you're all having a good weekend. See you soon! Thanks again!!

Well my good news for the week is that I'm down 2 pounds. It's not a lot, could have been more. But I need to not just blow it off, I need to claim that victory so I don't quit trying. It wasn't the easiest week, but I made steps in the right direction. This week hopefully I'll make more.

Red - Ok, this time I was the one in tears. Yes, you and I seem to have a great deal in common. I think several of us do. The anger, the trust issues, having been hurt, self punishing, the whole bit. I really appreciate your comments about me helping my daughter more than you know. I often look back in my life and wish I'd had just ONE person who had pulled me aside and said "Look... it doesn't MATTER what everyone else thinks, it doesn't matter if you're overweight, it doesn't matter if you're not a size 4, none of that matters. What matters is how YOU feel about you, and that you pursue what touches your heart." And so now, I'm pursuing that. Mostly because of the things I've learned about myself in the last couple years by being here at 3FC. Talking to people like you and Jolly and Happy and Hippy and Linda and Chach and Lucky and all the chicks over on the journal side, too. This has been a safe haven. A place where people understand. I can just be me here. What I didn't know was that I could have just been being me all along, but I'm learning. And chickie.. I'm so sorry I missed the birthday party!! Happy Birthday!!! I know things with work aren't so great right now, but I really hope you were able to have a wonderful day, because you deserve it.

Linda - I'm so, so sorry that your son is having a hard time. Life sucks sometimes, and it's worse when you're a teen. I was watching my kids' self esteem get totally trashed by the school system, by a society that has forgotten to value independence and free thinking, by kids who's parents forgot to teach them that life is precious. I pulled them out of school, and now I'm struggling to home school them. It's not easy, but I've watched their self worth soar. They understand now that there really are no rules about what they can or cannot do, as long as it doesn't hurt anyone. There is nothing stopping them from accomplishing what they want. Whether they just want to noodle through life and do what pleases them, or whether they want to excel and be the absolute best at something - that is up to them. As long as THEY are whole with what path they choose, that is all that is truly important. I hope that counseling helps your son, I know how hard it is to see your child hurt.

Happy - Congrats on getting through the interview!! I am the world's worst interviewee, I truly believe that. I hope very much that something comes through for you soon. I know about the drive... I drive an hour one way to get to my job now. But, I needed the work, and honestly the people I work with are fantastic. And that they are supporting me in my dream of becoming a hoof specialist means SO much to me, because of course it means that eventually I'll have to quit working there, but all of them are so happy for me that I have a chance to follow a dream, to pursue a passion. I hope you find a job where the people you work with are good to you.

Hippy - Your luau sounds like it's going to be a blast! I share with you your wondering why it is so hard to get back onto a plan even when you know it works, isn't that hard to be on, and you don't deal with the cravings. I've been having that problem a lot lately myself. I just wish I could flip a switch and make this my LIFE instead of having to deal with the way it WAS and the way it SHOULD BE.

Jolly - Awesome NSV there, girl! I have GOT to get my rear going here and get back into my smaller jeans. I can still squish into them, but it's uncomfortable and I'm sure doesn't look that great.

Today's exercise - Round penning Arashi and Eve. That consists of running pretty much consistently for about 20 minutes at a time in about 2" plus of sand. Talk about a workout. I truly believe that is the ONLY reason I lost any weight at all this week was all the running I've been doing in the RP with Arashi. He's making progress, now I need to work on MY body language to differentiate between turn towards me or away from me. That will be with Eve today. Arashi is doing good just to keep moving, but we're getting better with that, too. I hope everyone's weekend is going well!

Good morning ladies :D

We had beautiful weather here over the weekend. I got out and enjoyed, ate fairly well and drank alot of water. Big improvement for me!

Raven, 2 pounds is 2 pounds! They all add up!!! I didn't know you home school your kids. I think the school systems in the whole U.S. Stinks. I believe the kids are put into categories depending where there parents work and what the tag says on their blue jeans. I have taught Jordan that the brand of your clothes doesn't make you who you are. I know people think they do. What I see is a bunch of spoiled kids that think they are better than others because they wear $60.00 jeans. I see adults that think they are better than you because their husbands work in the coal mine. Sometimes I would love to show some of those people Gary's paycheck and let them know he makes just as much money as their husbands. Anyway, that's neither here nor there. I had thought about home schooling Jordan but he wanted no part of it. Maybe because he is an only child school is better for him so he can be with other kids. I just think it's great that you take the time in your busy life to teach your kids at home.

Linda, hope things well with you son. How old is he? It's good that he was honest with you so you were able to get him some help. It's hard raising a teenager and for me it's just starting.

Good morning Jolly, Happy and Red.

I hear laundry calling! Talk to you gals later!

Good morning chickies,

Following along in Hippy's dust, I too have a quick check-in. The weekend was nice, got out and enjoyed some of it. We were actually up in your neck of the woods Jolly - went to some museums.

I will, I will, I will be back on track this week. 'nuff of this messing around. Not that I've been on a bender, I just need to plan the food better, portion control, regular, consistent exercise and water, water, water. :yes: :yes:

Time for a downward slide on the scales....


Here's to a good week :cheers: - glass #1 of many glasses of water today! Way to go Raven on the loss for the week :high:

Good morning. I had a very good, but busy weekend. I weighed in this morning, and had a one pound loss. I am kind of surprised, because yesterday I was overtired and overate. I really need a plan B for eating when I am overtired. I didn't go out and get extra stuff, just ate whatever was in the house that sounded good. That is really the area I am having the hardest time with - when I am tired. I am skipping the barn tonight so I can get a little extra sleep, and hope to be back on track tomorrow. Any suggestions are appreciated.

Have a great day all.

Jolly I wish I had some answers. Being too tired to care about what I'm fixing, or not having the time to spend looking at recipes and trying new ones is a problem I'm battling now. I think if it were just me, it wouldn't be that big of a deal. But when I'm faced with fixing healthy, appetizing, filling, quick, cheap meals for all 4 of us.. it just gets to be too much for me to cope with sometimes when I add in everything else I need to be doing. Personally sometimes I think food occupies WAY too much importance as far as selection, etc. We have too many choices, food has become something we not only look forward to for sustinence, but for pleasure. It's not just a social thing to sit down with the family for dinner, it's a sensory thing. It's a time when we can slow down and smell good things, taste good things, relax, enjoy. I think sometimes that whole sensory thing has gotten so wrapped up in EATING that I wonder if I'll ever be able to divorce myself from it. Why can't food just be like going to the bathroom. I mean.. we don't obsess about how often or when or whatever when it comes to that. Or like taking a shower. Sure it feels good, but then it's done and that's that. Just something we need to do to get through. But no, it's more like having sex or doing a drug - it's something we think about even when we're not hungry, it's something we're hit with 25 gazillion times a day. *sigh* I'm ranting. I'm sorry. I just get tired of having to think about this so much.

It's Monday. I'm cranky. And tired. :tired: Bleh.

So I don't LOSE this, I am typing this in another program and then will cut and paste into the 3FC reply section! :cool:
I was so annoyed to lose this really long thing I typed on Saturday. I worked very long and hard on what I had to say, then I flipped to see the photo that Raven posted (nice, by the way) and I totally lost everything. I was kind of typing while I was reading along so I could respond to something from everyone. I think we all tend to do that? AT any rate, I am not going to lose this post!!!!!
I had a great, but busy, day yesterday and didn't have time to get here and read. Naturally, the weather was part of why we had a great day. Here in NH it was probably the best day, so far, this summer. In spite of my son's issues, my husband and I went to a local town fair (same one referred to that my son went to later on here) and attended a car show. We have two antique cars and brought one of them along. It was fun! I think they had record attendance. No rain, no humidity, a perfect day - seemed like everyone from all around here was there!
The "fair" atmosphere that surrounded this gorgeous weekend, combined with the emotional stress I was feeling during the week (and still) about my son didn't help my eating this week. I really kind of blew it, but did get exercise walking around - so maybe my weigh in tomorrow will be ok? But, I am not hopeful, and considering that I was on vacation the week before and was kind of "bad", I might have a gain. But, I am solid with what I am doing and a few minor setbacks won't stop me. This is a life-long journey, so the overall success is what is important.
My son is going to the doctor this morning, but I am really glad to report that he seems so much better. He went out with a few friends, 16 of them in fact, for pizza last night. They were mostly kids from his old school before we moved. He went to the same local fair/celebration that was held in the neighboring town and bumped into several of them. Soon, they were all calling each other on cell phones and they all met, and caravanned together to the local pizza place. Wish I had a cell phone, and my friends did, when I was a teenager! They are so connected with each other nowadays. I am feeling good that he actually left the house, and that he met up with people and DID something for a change. He's been alone a great deal, hiding out in his room, and not seeing many other kids - not good for anyone. Maybe his meds are finally kicking in a bit as he went out? He has what is called "social anxiety" in addition to depression. If you can't bring yourself to socialize, then you get further and further depressed, it's kind of one of those viscious circle things, I guess?
That seemed to help him with his attitude, but he seems to have some very good days and some very bad says, it seems. We're going to the doctor and will be talking about those very bad days/nights for sure.
Raven, thanks for your understanding and kind words. My kids are so precious to me and there are times, with teens, that we parents seem to clash with them. I remember those days so well from when I was growing up. We need to stay close, understanding their needs and to try very hard to be there when they need us and know when to "let go", it's a very hard line to walk. I have to keep reminding myself, when my temper flares about things like not picking up after themselves, and other issues that I must retain my friendship with them, above all. So hard.
So glad some of you seem to be quite successful with your efforts to lose weight and keep on track. I'm going to do it this week as well!
We are going away, again, next week..... boy am I heading for trouble!
Linda

Hello all, no time to catch up here. Just wanted to check in. Am heading to the gym soon. Trying to rev up again after a very unusual afternoon nap. Boy, do I need them? This thread was getting a ways down there. Wanted to bump it up. Will try to write later.

Wishing you all the best. Hope you're accumulating NSVs and otherwise and will report in soon!

Ciao tutti!

Just a quickie... Virus infected my machine at work, so yesterday worked late getting it squared away as best I could. This morning more time cleaning off files from my machine and a co-worker's machine. Woo.

I must be doing something right, the scale is moving down slowly but surely. MUCH better than moving up, like it was.

Linda - I'm so glad your weekend was a good one, and that your son was able to spend time with his friends. It's amazing how we withdraw so much when we need people the most.

Red - If I nap, I'm useless. Course there are those who would argue I don't need a nap to achieve that status. ;)

Getting better at staying OP foodwise. Still not perfect... when I was here past 6 last night I had a meltdown and grabbed a snickers bar. Between the frustration of the virus, the hunger, and the tiredness... yeah well, it was a lost cause, I'm afraid. Spent some hours alone at the barn last night surrounded by my horses. No kids. I needed the quiet. I just went out to the pasture, fed them and listened to the wonderful munching sounds in the twilight and breathed in their smell and leaned against them. There is no better therapy, I swear it.

Hey all. I need some kicks in the rear. I am not making horrible choices. No pints of ice cream, pounds of cookies, etc. But, I am self medicating with food right now. I don't want to do that, even if it isn't with really really bad food. I just refuse to go back down that path. It is funny, too, as part of it is due to increased expectations of myself. I expect to eat healthier. so, one day of not so good eating, I felt bad, so ate some more. Then, 2 days of bad eating, and I feel worse, so here I am eating more today. At least I am still exercising well. And, I am not withdrawing from everyone. I am trying to fix it.

I will remind myself it is all about choices. All poor choices do is make my journey to good health take longer. It does not define who I am. I WILL have a good day.

Have a good one all.

Raven, your self therapy with the horses sounds really cool. I'm not a horse person, but there are times when I need peace and it sounds like you were able to do just that!
Jolly, I think you and I are in some limbo kind of thing together. I got weighed this morning and was down .2, big F'n deal....No NSVs, just .2, blah..... At least I am now back t what I was before going on vacation. I want some progress, yet yesterday I couldn't stop myself from eating Lancelot's bag (the big sized bag, not the candy bar sized bag guys!) of peanut butter M&Ms. Boy was I bad.
Today, I've been better, at least, but don't feel as if I'm in good shape. For some reason, I am not as committed as I should be these last few days. Next week, we go to Rhode Island for another vacation, but will only be gone Sunday through Wednesday. I'd better be careful!
Linda

Well I know for the non-horse types this won't mean much, but I had a huge self esteem boost today in training. I put Eve (our Thoroughbred) in the round pen and taught her the difference between outside and inside turns, as well as stop and come to me. She is SO smart!!! There was a big part of me that didn't think I could do it. When I did, and then we put on a demonstration for Nickie, I was flying. What a huge rush!!

Next, my pudgy little Arashi. :D Getting him to even move is a success. :p

Food has been very good today so far. Dinner is smoked turkey sandwiches with lots of veggies.

Linda - I've been fighting that for a long time. I lost 45 pounds, I was so into it, working out 6 times a week, really enjoying everything, then... I just slid. I don't even know for sure what happened. I'm slowly turning it around again and getting back into a healthier lifestyle, but for about 2-3 months I've been really struggling.

Jolly - All I know to tell you is that if you let the days turn into weeks, they will turn into months. Do you want that to happen? The only way to avoid that is to find that core of resolve and just grit your teeth and stay OP. But you already know that... just like I do. *hug*

Raven,

Congrats on the training success!
Speaking of successes, I had a horrible lesson on my birthday where I wasn't getting through to my stoic mare. Yesterday I decided to just start thinking as IF I was a good rider, an excellent rider in fact, and something clicked and clicked with her. I was sharp, right there with the leg and whip and just an overall much more wake-up-and-listen-NOW!! attitude got through. I think she is looking for that. When the male owner of the club rides her she suddenly turns into the most tuned-in dressage horse you could want (at the lower levels, at least). When others ride, she turns into a plug. I think I'm onto something there. It's all attitude and belief in what we're capable of.

OK, gotta run, just had to write when I saw your message. You said, not a big thing for non-horsey types, so I think, well, that means jolly and myself have got to hit the keys!! Good for you, Raven/

Huge congrats, Raven. You are learning to be a good trainer. You can do this. Have faith in yourself. Way to go to you too, Red, on your epiphany.

I almost did not go to my TOPS meeting last night. I have been in this spiral since Sunday. I have not been eating as well as I would like to (though really, not all THAT horribly), I feel bad about myself, I eat some more. Again, wasn't binging on large amounts of junk food, but was eating too much overall. And even little things add up. Even if I wasn't overeating, I knew I was self medicating with food. I want to stop doing that. so, I was feeling bad, and didn't want to go to my meeting. I made myself go. I knew that support and facing up to things is what I needed, so I went. And, had a loss. How? Who knows. But, that little victory was enough to help me put the last couple of days back in perspective, and move on today. Choices. Perspective. Hmmmmm.

Hope everyone else is having a great day. Talk soon :)

Red - thank you! And as Jolly said, congrats on your epiphany. It is the truth that if we approach our horses with a positive and clear picture of what we want, we generally get it. I think sometimes it's us that needs the training, not the horses. ;)

Jolly - Here's something I keep seeing in your posts (paraphrased)... "I'm eating badly! (Ok, not THAT badly...)" You know what? It's bad enough to make you feel crappy about it. Perspective? Rationalizing? Are you *really* making a choice when you eat badly? Or are you eating, then rationalizing it later that it wasn't really that bad, and it was a choice, and you'll accept the consequences. Well, of course you will, you don't have much of a choice once it's on your hips. ;) I just recognized that as something I do, too. The "it's better to ask for forgiveness than permission" routine. Sometimes I think we're getting too good at owning up to our slip-ups and getting too comfortable with them. Something for me to think about. And thank you so much for the support on the training issue. I continue to feel as though I'm a wannabe. Maybe one of these days I'll feel like I'm actually training.

I hope everyone has a great day!

On the fly here, but just wanted to comment. Jolly, I think Raven has a good point (and one for all of us). "Getting too good at owning up to our slipups," yes, I think this happens a lot with me. And yes, I'm eating a lot better than years ago, but is that my goal? ****, no! Is my eating now getting me to where I see myself a couple months down the road?! I don't think soooo..... If your choices as you like to say ARE getting you where you want to go, then fine. You did see a loss. If you want to see a bigger loss, if you want to hurry things up, or feel better about things, then maybe you need to crack the whip. If not, then relax and stop beating yourself up! It sounds like you've come very far recently so I tend to think it's the latter case. Not so with me, maybe not so with Raven. You decide.

Ok, gotta run. . . Sorry, everyone I've been not talking to. I'm reading. I will get to you. Very sorry! Please don't feel left out. I'm just in a hectic phase again. . .

Well, guys . .. Do I think that how I ate earlier this week was good? No. Is that how I want to eat? Again, no. Was I self medicating with food? Yes.

But, on the flip side, my "sins" were eating too large a portion size, and eating for the wrong reasons. But I was feeling like I had sat down to a whole pizza, half gallon of ice cream, pound of chips and dip, and a 2 pound bag of ice cream. Just for breakfast. And feeling that badly about what I ate, was making me feel worse, which led me to eat more for comfort.

That is why I said I need to keep perspective. "Cracking the whip" just makes me feel bad about myself, which is what leads me to overeat. If I can keep this in perspective, I do better and lose weight. To be succesful, I HAVE to take it out of the context of being a bad person with no self control who will never succeed always be fat and never be loved. I made a bad choice. Period. All it does is slow down my progress. And as far as rationalizing, again, my eating couldn't have been that bad, as I still had a one pound loss for the week. I was taking it out of perspective.

I know we are all different, and what we need is different. For me, I need to find that balance. Even more than a certain number on the scale, size off the rack, or even good physical health, I need self esteem. As I am finding the self esteem, the rest is falling into place. I want to develop healthy habits, so whatever weight I end up at, I stay at. I refuse to be one of the 96% that gains the weight back. Been there, done that, not gonna do it again.

Have a good day everyone.

Yep, I agree... this is all about balance, and finding what really works for us. I'm struggling to find out what works for ME. Not what's worked for anyone else. And I'm struggling to find out what works as a lifestyle, not as a diet. And I also agree that so much of it is based in self esteem. I thought a lot about what Red said about what difference did it make whether I got on that plane 50 pounds overweight or not? I suppose really, the only thing that was figuring into that was shame. My own shame at meeting new people, starting a new adventure, and still carrying around the old baggage, the old fat, the evidence of my old failings. But that shouldn't have anything to do with this, and I see that now. So now, my real goal is to establish what my caloric intake needs to be to just maintain my weight as it is. I have a fair idea of that, but I don't know it for sure. Then from there I can cut down on this or substitute something else for the higher calorie version or whatever to get the roughly 5 pounds a month or 1-2 pounds a week I would like to see me losing. I'm tired of agonizing about eating the wrong thing, I'm tired of obsessing about how many ounces of this or how many cups of that... I can't live that way for the rest of my life. I also am tired of pushing myself into activities that I will not continue for more than a few months. I have been setting the bar so high, repeatedly, that I would simply burn out trying to achieve it. I think it was the ideal, not really the realistic or even the truly desired. I gave lip service to the "I don't want to be perfect." But inside, that's all I thought about. I think I'm beginning to accept I really don't WANT perfect. I want ME. I want to eat in a way that keeps me happy and satisfied, but still achieves my slow weight loss goals. I want to exercise, but I'm so sick and tired of forcing myself to do things to impress other people or to prove a point. And yes, I'm very guilty of doing exactly that. It's taking some weird thought processes, but I think I'm starting to approach realistic instead of fantasy and idealistic.

Here's to balance. I like what you wrote, Raven. I, too, am starting to find that balance. I still have moments, like earlier this week, when I fall back on old patterns. But again, I am trying to change 33 years of behavior. It is not easy. All I can say, is reassure you that as I am working toward finding that balance - between accepting myself today while still wanting to change - that self esteem improves, which makes it easier to face the next challenge. Yes, I had a rough part of the week. But I forced myself to face it, and work through it, and I am stronger today. For facing it and not hiding.

Good luck, my friend. And never forget your worth.

Well, Raven, Jolly, Red, and everyone, sounds like we all need to find away to kick our butts into gear. I really know exactly what I ought to be doing, but actually doing it is another thing.
I was better yesterday and used one flex point by the end of the day, not too bad.
This morning, I worked out and have been doing some serious house cleaning as my brother in law is coming, unexpectedly, for dinner this evening. He has not seen this house and we moved here in Dec. I want it to look nice the first time he sees it. So hard to keep a house clean with teens in the house!
Raven, sounds like you made some serious accomplishments with your horse, congrats! Could I be a little silly and tell you all that I trained my cat to roll over like a dog. I think it's amusing, but the rest of the family thinks I am nuts!
I like what you said, Red, about it being an attitude and a belief with the horse that carries through. So, we must square our collective shoulders and have an attitude like that and believe that we are really successful with our weight loss efforts. We are the ones who will show the other's how it's done! Maybe the way we carry ourselves in everything we do will show others that we command respect? I like that!
Jolly, so glad you went to your meeting and ended up with a loss! Sounds like it was just the right thing to keep you going!
Sometimes they say at ww meetings that if you eat too little, the body thinks it's starving and won't allow the weight to come off, then if you spend a few days being "bad", the body then gets the message that the "famine" is past and will let go of a little more? I like to use that excuse, sometimes, when I am overeating a bit, at least!
Raven said, Sometimes I think we're getting too good at owning up to our slip-ups and getting too comfortable with them.
Maybe you are right. We confess our "sins" to each other and we all are VERY understanding to each other. Maybe we need to be LESS understanding? It's so hard to be less understanding, though, as no one knows better than people like us what it's like to really want something and throw caution to the wind, etc.
Red kind of said this same thing as well.
I need to take a serious look at what I want to accomplish and recognize that I misbehave and what the triggers are that make me do that.
Seems we eat out at least two or three times a week, that is NORMAL for our family. So, why does my mind say to me, each time we eat out, that it's a "special occasion" that allows me to have what I used to have, before ww? I need to control those urges, eat better ALL the time!
Jolly, I am right there with you when you say "I refuse to be one of the 96% that gains the weight back. Been there, done that, not gonna do it again". I could have said the exact same thing!
I want to stay thinner/healthier for the rest of my life. For me, if that means journaling each and every day of my life and always being this way, then I shall do this! You see, I realize that I can lose weight. It's taking longer this time, and it's harder, as I am older now and in "menopause". I can do this, however, if I stop all my efforts as I get to goal weight, then it's going to come right back on me again - and probably more.
Next time, my body will hold on to the weight even more when I try again to lose, and I would try again.
So, this time is the LAST time.
Never told you guys this, but a carload of teens drove by me one day when I was loading a few things into the car awhile ago and my "better side" was clearly in view vs. my face. One of the kids in the car said, loudly, "Look at the fatty" and they all laughed. I could have cried. I don't want anyone to ever ride by me again and say that. I want people who see me, even when I am 60 or 70, to say "she's in great shape, she must work out". Wouldn't that be great?
Well, off I go, we are starting in with a severe thunderstorm and not a good idea to be on line! :cool:
Linda

Geez Linda, if you're 150 pounds and they are making fatty remarks, remind me to stay far away from NH :rollpin: That's just plain ignorant. I'd have to make like Kathy Baker in the movie "Fried Green Tomatoes" and just mow them down - I'm older and better insured... By the way, where are you going in Rhode Island on vacation?

I must say I am getting more and more disgusted with the general state of the population. People seem to think that they have some God given right to their own happiness and doing their own thing to the point that it totally infringes upon or endangers those around them. When did we lose manners, the golden rule, personal responsibility and general laws of a civilized society? I told my husband the other day that maybe we should just liquidate everything we have and move to some tiny patch of land in a remote forsaken area of Idaho or Montana or Wyoming already.

And I have channelled that anger and frustration back to myself. As of Sunday night, I gave myself a few good boots. No more excuses, gentle hugs or kicks. Time to take some responsibility for my actions. There are things I want to do and things I have to do. The "wants" are generally alot more satisfying short term but over the long haul keep me in the very place I've been for too long. On the other hand, the "have tos" are not fun, are usually met with lots of groaning and invoke an immediate avoidance factor. But the bottom line is, everything is a choice and I can't really complain, nor will I allow myself to do it if I keep giving in to the wants and never doing the need tos. I'm never going to change if I keep reverting back to old habits.

It's like smoking, sure I still want to smoke after a clean 4 months but now I tell myself too bad, so sad, things are tough all over - just get over yourself Happy and DEAL WITH IT. You're NOT going to do this anymore. So now I suck fresh air into a clean straw when I can't get the urges out of my head and I'm comfortable with that... And I figure I can apply the same principles to the weight, food and exercise.

Thusfar this week it has worked. Yes I have had some ice cream but I chose to eat it even after I weighted the pros and cons of it. And that was that. I also rode my bike consistently so far - even did it twice today. I was huffing and puffing - I really need to strengthen my legs and it was that thought that got me out on the bike twice. I'm not doing 20 miles at a crack NOW but if I give in and say I'm tired after 10 minutes, I never will be able to ride for an hour at a time.

Derry you are right to focus hard now. I am older than you and I have been through getting older, menopause, hypothyroidism and can tell you with complete assurance that all those things DO make the weight loss efforts even more of a challenge. I really wish I had changed my life style back when I was in my early 30's. But can't change the past, can only control what I'm going to do in the very next minute. I also agree with you on the eating out bit. Most menus have some sort of diet friendly selections but rarely will I chose them. Actually I was out shopping this weekend and stopped for lunch. I was about to chose something that was really yummy but was in the midst of my boot myself lecture. I wound up with a bowl of clear soup and 1 single trip to the salad bar. And there was plenty of space on my plate around the salad items. Believe me, I don't do that very often. A little voice in my head said "if you can't chose wisely then maybe you shouldn't be eating in a restaurant". Way too often I give in to myself and it's this endless cycle of give in, guilt, eat, chastise, be good, be tempted, give in, and on and on. I finally accepted the fact that either I make a long term, concentrated effort to change or I accept myself as I am - avoiding mirrors, out of shape, out of breath, ashamed that I don't look anywhere near what I'd like to and just getting bigger every year. I learned to control one addiction, maybe I can do the same for another.

Sorry.. that is my ramble for the week. Now, don't you wish I had just shut up? :tape:

I do like your theme of balance and accountability. I'm in if you are. And congrats to the horsey highlights some of you have experienced this week. Righto, this greenhorn does not understand them but I do understand that they have made you guys excited in a good way and that's got to be something to cheer about. :bravo:

yes... I will be in bed by midnight - even if there is a great meteor shower outside. G'night all.

YOWZA!! Happy, you are on a ROLL!! Do I wish you had just shut up?!?! NO WAY!! Your post has the chills running up and down my spine. Jeez oh man, this is better than caffeine, which I was about to stoke up on to fuel my gym madness. Maybe I won't even need it!! Way to go, woman!!

Ok, just had to come in to say that. Out and back. Will talk later. Raven, Derry, loved your posts as well. Derry, megamorons, the kids in the car, and that's what they are, kids. At 150 you couldn't be all that much of a fatty. Like happy says, just ignorant types. But, heh, if it motivates you to get that rear in shape for someone who can truly appreciate it in all its forms, then cheers and get to work!!

Good morning all. Derry, it is amazing how people are. Weight seems to be the last acceptable thing to make fun of and predjudice against. I wish people would just learn. Happy, congrats on all the steps you are making in the right direction. Stopping smoking is huge, and you are right - if you can tackle that beast, you can tackle the weight, or anything else.

I have an appointment next week to step up my weight training. My friend will laugh at me. After dragging my feet, then being dragged kicking and screaming into doing weights, I can't say I love doing weights, but I love the results. The first routine I set up was 30 minutes of upper and lower body. It is good, helped get me in a routine, and has shown some results. But now that I am doing it, I really want to focus more. So one of the trainers is going to help me set up two workouts. one for upper and abs, and one for lower and butt. The other thing is that I am now noticing when clothes are not fitting right. I have this pair of pants I love, but realize how really too big they are. So, instead of holding on to them until they are rags, I am going to send them to Goodwill, and look for their smaller sibling.

Oh well. Off to work. I will talk to you all later.

Happy, the fatty remark was when I was heavier, probably about 165 or so. But, still, it hurt. It was one of the things that led me here and back to ww, though, so maybe it was a Godsend?
We are going, in RI, to a place called Weekapaug. My in laws have had a place in that community for years. My husband's grandparents we going down there before my father in law was even born. They rented in those days, then finally purchased a place of their own there, as they love it so. It's right on the ocean, just North of the CT border. Looks like hurricane Charley might be downgraded to a tropical storm and might be making a "visit" while we are there. I'm coming stocked with books to read, sewing, knitting and don't mind, just getting away is nice! We leave on Sunday and come back on Wednesday, not a long vacation as Wacky (the famous boss from ****) has deemed it appropriate that Lancelot not be allowed to take the rest of the week off. Typical.
Happy, I too have wondered what has happened to our society, it's a "me, me, me" thing with little regard for others. Though, those of us, here, don't seem that way. I totally agree with what you said. I turn on the tv and there is nothing but "trashy" things on the are "naughty" all the time. Why has our society gotten to the point where something has to be "naughty" to be entertaining? I'm not in that mindset at all, and wonder why this is happening?
Don't mind my religious views here, but it kind of goes along with removing the 10 commandments from that court building that was in the news. I don't think they were put there to enforce some else's religion onto others, I think they were put there as a reminder of the "laws" that humanity needs to follow. The 10 commandments, like the "golden rule" are important weather you believe in God or not. Seems like there are many subversive groups who are just bashing what is left of "goodness" in the world because they get all up in arms about their "rights". Yet, the rights of others who quietly and obediently go through each day are being "trod upon" day in and day out. Sorry if I was spouting off a bit, just a bit frustrated.
Happy, one thing that I have to share this morning is that I have been smoke free for about 17 1/2 years. There are STILL days, here and there, that I would like one, just so you know. It gets easier, better, and one day soon you will walk into a smoke filled room and find the odor detestable, then you will truly know you are done with it, forever!
Hi Red, Hi Raven, Hi Jolly, wonder how Chachee is? Hope she's ok, will probably be back to us soon with a full report? Did she ever mention what her mom said when she came to visit? Sassy, are you out there?
Linda

'Morning chickies.

Derry, my husband is from Westerly/Dunns Corners RI. He would walk to the beach from his house (about a mile away) and as a teenager he cleaned the beach at the jetty. So I am well familiar with the area - sure is pretty out there. We don't get over there much anymore but when we do, I make sure he takes me out to the rocks because I love to sit there and listen to the surf, especially at night. Enjoy your few days, brief as they might be. Hope the hurricane holds back just like Bonnie did. And I totally agree with everything you said about "spouting off" - when you get tired, you can step down off the soapbox and I'll take over. :lol:

Chachee, hope the surgery went well for you, sending you good thoughts.

Jolly, that's terrific that you are stepping up the weight training. Coupled with the cardio it will really help to reshape the body. I need to start back on the Pilates again - I am a terrible sloucher and that really makes you look huge. You're right about the ill fitting clothes too - big loose clothes only make us look bigger than big. I got 2 really great shirts on a fabulous close out sale but they are a bigger size than I need. They were such a bargain I couldn't resist and I really liked them, but now that I see them on, they are too big and really are quite unflattering. We tend to shy away from fitted clothes but really, that's what looks best on us.

I was going to go camping this weekend - all excited about it too but an extended family member had a death in the family and we will be attending the memorial service on Sunday. Kinda bummed about that because I so have been wanting to go camping but I think it's more important to support her instead. Just as well I suppose as I can get some things done around here. :(

Gotta run now, hope you all have a terrific weekend!

Hiya chickies...

Still fighting some sort of stomach bug - I was better yesterday, then not so great today. I wish it would just GO. My computer seems to be fighting some sort of bug, too. I keep sweeping with Ad-Aware and Symantic, yet still I get weird explorer hijacking behavior. It's making me buggy.

I spent about an hour yesterday rasping Eve's hooves. That has GOT to count as something. On a good note, my back is fine. My forearms, however, got REAL tired. I *think* I'm getting some idea of what I'm doing. I guess I'll know for sure when Cindy comes back in September and takes a look at them with her practiced eye.

Happy - I'm sorry about the death in the family, and that you didn't get to go camping.

Linda - I hope you have a nice vacation.

Jolly WTG on cleaning out the closet and splitting the weight routines. Now you're sounding like a serious lifter. ;) I always went with a three way split myself. Hope you get the results you're looking for.

I too am hoping Chach is doing ok .. I sent her an e-mail, haven't heard anything back yet, but I can kind of understand that.

It's finally Friday, this has been another brain frying week. I hope the weekend is quiet. I have several folks down in FL I'm a little worried about right now because of Charley. One gal is only 3 miles inland very close to the point of landfall. And last I heard they're saying this thing will be a Cat. 3 when it hits. She's refused to evacuate because she has no truck or trailer to take her horses with her, and she won't leave them. At the risk of sounding like I'm insane, I can understand where she's coming from. I'll just say a lot of prayers at this point, and hope that everyone down there comes through Charley safely.

TGIF,ladies. That is all I can say. TGIF. I am going to eat some dinner, watch the Olympics, and maybe do some cleaning. I need to rest. Here's to a great weekend for all of us, and safety from the storms.

Later.

"Pay attention to health issues and don't let yourself emotionally sabotage those things that are important to you."
I cut a pasted this from my morning Aquarius horoscope as it soooo seemed to "fit" for me this week. :shrug:
Yesterday, I cheated, I had doughnuts. I knew what I was doing, and still had them anyway. What's wrong with me? I am going away, I should be at my BEST with my ww plan, so if I indulge in a bit "extra" over the next few days I can "break even" with my weight. Yet, I was really out of line and feel almost "hung over" this morning. What was I thinking? Today had better be better.... no one to blame but me! :devil:
Happy, sounds like you and I might have one of those "small world" kind of connections, given that my in laws kind of "grew up" in the same area that your husband is from. I sent you a private message with their family last name. It would be such a thrill if they knew each other! My husband cleaned the beach at the jetty, too, when he was a teenager and he was a lifeguard there as well!
Hope you feel better, Raven. I hate stomach bugs. I always joke that I lose weight, but would rather not lose a thing that way!
Might post more later as I will be home alone this evening. Lancelot and my daughter are going to RI today. My son has to work tonight, so I won't go until tomorrow, with him. I never spend an evening alone, particularly on a Saturday night.
Linda

Good morning, everyone. A rainy one in Tokyo today, thus I'm finding some time to write. Rained out of riding. I really miss seeing my horse. Oh well, try to think of how to use this day otherwise. No lack of options there, that's for sure.

Recently, I have been really trying to look at my thinking and uncover all the underlying negativity that I know exists. On the surface I am the picture of optimism, keep at it, you can do it, don't worry, hang in there, all those are my phrases to myself and to others but on the INSIDE I've been realizing how I am the total opposite.

The reason I started thinking about this was that I just don't see progress. I seem stuck in a cycle of work hard/see progress (lose weight)/goof off, binge, sloth/backslide (gain weight)/get disgusted with myself/get back on the ball/ and over and over again it goes.

And it got me wondering, just what is going on here?!?!?!? I have the feeling I used to do better, used to actually be able to at least enjoy the progress for a matter or weeks. Now, it seems as if the first sign of progress is a signal to me to scramble madly to sabotage myself, as if I am intent on maintaining the status quo. WHY?!?! I honestly don't understand why I would do this. All the books say, in one way or the other, that there is an underlying reason for this, something we're putting in our own paths to block ourselves or some fear or payoff that is preventing us from getting to where we say we want to go. But, for the life of me, I truly don't see it.

I admit I can't see myself as the me I want to be either. Or when I try to I feel this sudden feeling of, why bother? And then I think, well, give it up, if you really don't feel like bothering, if the reasons don't hold so much for you, then just don't do it. And then I think, no, I really do want this and here again is the round and round.

Wow, what is happening? Anybody have any insights?

******

Derry -- you know, your last message sounds very similar. You eating the doughnuts, being fully aware of what you were doing and doing it anyhow, then asking, what's wrong with me? Maybe we can mull this together.

Raven -- hope you're feeling better. How's the stomach? I read that Charley caused a lot of damage in Florida. Sure hope your friend and her horses are OK. You don't sound crazy to me. Just because they're animals don't make them any less cherished than humans would be. I, on the other hand, simply cannot understand people who don't think this way. But then, I'm a vegetarian because of it and most people just don't have the love of animals I do I guess.

You know, Raven, I was reading an earlier message of yours and I really hear you on that shame part. Well, I don't think it's shame with me but it is a great affront to my pride to think that I am carrying around baggage from the past. And yes, I see my fat as that. I see it as the effect my experiences have had on me that I make the choices I do, that I don't feel the desire to get the body I want, or, that even though I have the desire, I don't do what's necessary to get there. And that pisses me off. I don't mind meeting people or anything because of it but I do just always feel that I've gone into things (life!) unprepared and that it's no fault but my own, that I could be so much more and yet don't make the effort. To me I seem to be making massive efforts to just live, pay the bills, get through the day, make the appointments that I've said I would make. And it seems I never get around to doing the things I say are so important or when I do I turn around and UNDO them.

Your talking about wanting to be perfect, and then thinking of accepting realistic, I don't know. Sometimes I think my goals are too high but then again, if others can do them, certainly I can. I think maybe my thinking they're too high is what is truly keeping me from them. That I allow myself to be so influenced from other people's ideas, their acceptance of mediocrity, that I then think of my dreams as unattainable, when there is no reason in the world I shouldn't be able to lose fat, have a strong, toned body on top of the other things I do in my life, ride, work, socialize.

When I talk to people who are tops in their fields, whatever that may be, and I talk to a lot because of my work, I hear their attitude. It's not one of, oh, this is so hard, this is such a struggle. They simply acknowledge that it does take discipline but look at me with a look that says, yeah, and so what?, isn't that obvious? I also see the way other people treat them, act around them. No one would dare try to stop them, to say, oh, why do you want to do that? It's obvious at this point why they want to do it, because it must feel great to be where they are. The ones who complain about their own lacks around these disciplined types are looked on with, though not disdain, a very palpable disinterest. Their whinings are simply blocked out, an annoyance.

Well, I'm just trying to look at things here because I hear you saying over and over you want this and that and then not getting it, and then saying making you're wanting too much, and then deciding, no, after all, you DO want it, and it sounds so much like me.

I find too that I am surrounded by an awful lot of people who are very happy with not really doing anything. They complain a lot but are very, very ready with an excuse and more often than not it's age. People much younger than me say they're getting old and write off their habits to that. It seems to be an acceptance of their own unhappiness.

Even yesterday at work, a young guy was upset because his health check indicated his liver wasn't in the best shape. Now, this is a young guy who drinks a lot, as do many of the people here. It seems a simple equation, too much drinking is bad for the liver, right? duh?!!? Instead of him just saying, ok, no big thing, off the booze for a while, he sat there all day worrying, saying he was shocked, that he'd thought he was the picture of health, that he should get it checked further etc. etc. The idea of not drinking or cutting down just did not sit well with him. It's like he was looking for everything to do BUT that. Weird.

happy -- yes, sorry to hear of the death in your family. That is so good of you to be there for support at this time. How are you doing with your kick butt attitude? Have you kept it up?

Jolly -- what's up with you? how are the weights? I love them. And, don't the Olympics just inspire you? I love watching them too. Of course, I'm forced to watch a lot more judo, volleyball and swimming than I'd like to because Japan is strong in those sports so the coverage is focused on them but I do like gymnastics and the marathon so that is nice as you see a lot of those too. Sure wish they'd show a more varied view of things though and not just focus on the one county's athletes. I think this happens all over though. I guess there's not much way around that.

Hello all. Just a quick post in a crazy weekend. Trying to get some more practise in for next week's golf outing. Riding, of course. Helping a friend out at a horse show tomorrow. Starting raquetball lessons this week. Renting "Hidalgo." Trying to decide if I should put in for a promotion or not. Hmmmmm. Lots of things to keep me up nights.

Happy, sorry to hear about the death in the family. Raven, hope you and your friends, etc are safe from the storm. Derry, have fun in Rhode Island. Red, I see both sides of your post. You are right, sometimes we block our own progress with cleverly hidden self doubts. But, there is also some truth in goals being too high. Yes, if someone else can do something, I should be able to - but not necessarily everything. We each have our own gifts and strengths. Just because some people can run a sub 4 minute mile, I ain't never gonna. you know what I mean. Again, there has to be that balance and perspective between what really is out of range, and what is self defeating. It is a hard one.

Take care everyone, and have a wonderful weekend.

Hi jolly, hope you get through your busy weekend. Horse shows. Love 'em.
I hear you on the too-high a goal, but I am still convinced that the only block to the vast majority of goals is a lack of desire. I mean, sure I'd like to ride in the Olympics, but I know I don't have the desire to do what would be necessary. But I think I could.

You could probably run a sub 4-minute mile if you really wanted to train for that, or you could get very close. I mean, sure, some things are simply not possible, but, remember, there's no need for extremes or thereotical discourse. All I'm talking about here is a very simple desire to get the body I want to have, which is had by many, many people, and I'm not talking growing 6 more inches or plastic surgery! :rofl: If I think I can, if I think of it as easy then I can do it! You know, often, I'm in the gym and my workout is over, and I think, that was really nothing hard at all. But I have myself so psyched up that it is SO much work, oh poor me, poor me, that I have started to believe it myself. I think this is learned behavior, in part from trying to protect oneself from people who would exploit you. I have learned to say I'm busy when I'm not because I want the time to myself etc. and I have learned to say I need more money when I could just as well be more careful somewhere.

I really think that I have been trying to convince myself that my goals were too high IN ORDER for me to sabotage them. Bizarre? Twisted? No doubt!!

I'm going to try to have more of a can-do! attitude, even if it's done by stealth!

I think that some do one, some do another. Yes, we could do anything "if we had the desire." But I think it's more than desire. We may have the desire, but not the will, the committment, the drive, the perseverence, the time, the money, etc. And there are so many people who set the bar too high for the reality of all those things.

I have recently come into a true passion in my life. I believe that passion is ONE of the things that allows people to excel greatly in a particular area in their life. I have come farther in training a horse and rasping their hooves in the last three months than I would have ever believed possible, simply because for me it is extremely fun. It's hard work, it's exhausting sometimes, it's physically and mentally demanding and challenging. But I don't complain, don't whine, at least not seriously. Sometimes in jest. :D Because I love it. See, THAT is something I feel totally compelled to excel in. I don't have anything to prove, I just want to learn, and keep learning, and then learn some more.

With my weight, I've had too much to prove, and I'm sick of it. Do I like lifting weights? Yes - sometimes. Am I willing to accept that I don't like it all the time and realize that there are people who will consider that wimping out? Sure, **** yeah. Finally, I am. Let them run a horse around a roundpen for an hour and a half breathing dust and nearly getting their head kicked off a few times, then as they're coughing up crap from their lungs, rasp a horse's hooves that's dancing all over the place and knocks them in the head so hard they see stars with a back hoof because it was trying to kick off a fly, but keep working till those hooves are beautiful and perfect and their arms hurt like a mother because they can't afford a hoof stand. *chuckle* That's my reality. That's my passion. That's my love. I've been struggling for two years to find a reason to even bother losing weight. I'm really truly understanding a few things... like one of the biggest problems I've had was eating for all the wrong reasons. Yes, I knew that for a long time... gave it lip service, still did it. That is one of my big pushes now. Stop eating for any reason but because I'm hungry and I need food. At least the vast majority of the time. Eat reasonable portions of whatever the heck I want. If I want junk - I'll eat junk, just in a small portion. Ok, so it's not the best nutritional approach. One thing at a time. I don't eat much junk anyway, so that's not that big of an issue, what really kills me is the "dessert after every meal" syndrome. I want to be ME. Not what I think I should be to meet anyone else's standards. I've been trying so hard to prove that I can lose weight, that I lost sight of actually losing weight. I've been trying so hard to prove that I can work out, I lost all enjoyment of it. I wasn't doing it for me, because I liked it, I was doing it to prove something to everyone else. And I'm not going to do that anymore.

There's one thing I've finally come to, and it started almost a year ago, and it's really beginning to blossom in my life. I LIKE me. I like who I am. I honestly like my body. It needs improvements, and I'll do that as I go. It will never be the "perfect" body I have so long fantasized about. Not because I'm incapable of achieving that, but because I do not care to put the work into it. At least not now. I will continue working on pilates, and I will continue to tweak my food and my lifestyle, because I really do want to lose another 40-45 pounds.

And I will. :)

A flyby here. Just wanted to report a NSV!! Hurrah. I was feeling lower than low today, pigging out on junk food, only eating healthy in the morning. Rained out of riding and with the gym closed I was doing a total sloth day. Then I said, NO! I will rescue the day. I dug out an old video and did it. It was a Cindy Crawford (the 2nd one) old but great. In fact, I don't remember doing that one too much. Anyone know it.

Then, even though it's late, I decided to **** with the calories. I need some nutrition and am about to have my second good meal of the day. OK, it was a day of megacalories but nonetheless I feel back on track. Gotta learn to get over these crash and burn kind of days and kick on.

Kicking on . . . .

Way to go on the NSV, Red, and for some amazing discoveries, Raven. I hope everyone is having a terrific weekend. Raven, have you heard from your Florida friend? Everyone else from that sideof the country ok??

Good morning, or evening! Whichever time zone you live in!
Only have a few moments as our power keeps going off, this "tropical storm" Charley has hit full force and it's amazing! Can see why Florida had so much damage!
I have to get ready to leave and get on the road, will be driving slowly and carefully all along the coast - which further proves that I am totally nuts! Will dirve in bad weather for a vacation, though! : )
Until Wednesday or Thursday,
Linda
Trying to "think thin"

Red - Congrats on the NSV!

Jolly - Thank you. You know I think you started something with me. You reminded me of all the things I went through last year, and brought back a lot of thoughts I needed to be thinking. About how this isn't just about losing weight, it's about changing my life. Because if I don't change my life, how CAN I lose weight and keep it off? It's about changing my perspectives. I finally was able to make contact with folks down there yesterday afternoon, and everyone and their families (four legged and two) made it through just fine. One woman's horse had some minor scrapes from flying debris, but it's all superficial. I can't tell you how relieved I was.

Linda - Ought to be an interesting drive!! I hope you have a great time.

Well, whatever I'm doing, it's working. I'm back into the 170's this morning, 178 to be precise. My shorts are starting not to restrict my breathing, and in a couple weeks I should be back where I was when I went off on my mental meanderings.

Nick and I have had a lot of talks lately about eating, obsessing about it and our weight, and recently had something come up with one of our horses which could potentially be someting extremely serious, and she has had her perceptions altered in a moment. She's an amazing kid. Both of my kids are amazing. And I know that together, the three of us and then Richard with us too, will weather whatever comes along. I'm so very blessed to have a family that might be a little broken, but still good.

Morning ladies,
Congrats on all the NSVs this week. :high: It's going to be a busy week for me, not much time to post. We're going away for the weekend - I have an out of town interview next Monday and we're going to take the weekend to scope the area out. Lots to look up and research so we can make the most of our trip. And I am in a mood to declutter around here - yes you can have too much laying around, even if it is neatly arranged. And I'm going to do the best I can this week with food and regular exercise of some sort every single day. That is my challenge for the week.

Linda, I too remember Chickadee's in town. :T I don't understand how those places didn't survive in place of the salty, greasy, bland stuff that passes for fried chicken today. Hope you had a safe trip down to your vacation.

Anyway, got to run for now. Hope you all have a terrific week full of doing the things that make life worth living instead of just trudging through the days.

Not much to report this morning. Good luck with your interview Happy. Where is it? Good luck with your decluttering. I have to make time to do that as well. Unfortunately, I get in those moods, and end up throwing out way too much stuff. Oops.

Here's to a great week everyone. I will be weighing in tomorrow morning. I am working out tonight and taking a racquetball lesson.

Hello Ladies from the Land of No boobs!!

Just kidding! Feeling good and thought I'd come check in with you all.

First, before the surgery I went and weighed in. Down another 1.6 to 219.6. 35.4 pounds lost now, got that 35 pound star! yay!

I know it's going to take a little amount of time to get back down, as I am on painkillers and not eating much. So, I'm kinda in starvation mode and eating what I can get my hands on right away.

Okay, the surgery went really well. It actually took only 76 minutes for the operation--he said it went a lot quicker than usual. We got a late start at noon, instead of 11, but it always works that way. He marked me up with a sharpie pen, like they do on those shows, then wheeled me into the operating room where Tim McGraw was blasting on the speakers. Didn't know my doc was a hick!!

Next thing I remember it was someone asking me if I wanted to wake up for awhile. I looked at the clock and it was 1:45. I felt great, other than being a little loopy, my hubby came in and they told him he could take me home as soon as I could get around. I guess I was a really good patient. So, hubby went to tell my mom and son to get on home, and he came back in with my clothes. We came home and I started to take my painkillers and my antiobiotics.

I had a reaction to the percocet they gave me. Had no idea it was a dirivitive of oxycodone. I was itching and hallucinating and so wired that I could not sleep. They changed the script to Vicoden and I am doing much better on it. I was wrapped in a compression ace bandange and they removed it on Friday. I'm not in a sports bra with padding to help the stitched heal.

It grosses me out to look down, because they are bruised and sewn all together, but good lord, what a difference. I have cleavage where it's suppossed to be, and they don't hang down anymore--like the pencil test, they would not be able to hold a pencil underneath. I would guess them to be a 36 full c. They are still swollen, but no way are they a DD.

I was really bruised on my sides and really sore, so when the doc called me at home that night, I asked him why. He said that even though he was able to pull the skin tight, it didn't look good enough to him. He said that he did lyposuction on my sides to remove the rest of the fat. What a wonderful doctor, huh? Once the swelling goes down, I am sure I won't have that fat hanging over the bra strap.

He removed a little over 2 pounds total and brought them back up to their perky stage. I have felt so good that I actually slept in my bed the second night I was home. Didn't need the recliner. My arms haven't hurt yet--unlike most women who have this surgery. I'm just more tender and a little sore. I don't believe I've actually had "pain" to speak of yet.

I go in tomorrow for removal of the stitches and for him to see how I am doing. I'm down to one painkiller a day, which is at night, so I am going to ask if I can go back on half days starting this Thursday. Shouldn't be a problem.

Thanks for all your thoughts and prayers. I know that, along with being a relatively good shape to start with, has really helped. Now I just gotta get rid of this tummy that I can actually see now. Everyone is amazed at how small I look, and so am I. A little over 19 pounds to go to reach my first goal.

I'll try to check in a little later this week.

Thanks for remembering me!!

Love ya!

Chach

Hurray for "Perky" I m glad the surgery went well, and you are recovering nicely. Hurray for you:cb::cb: Can't wait until you are back posting full time.

I did my first racquetball lesson. I LOVED it. Will just have to see how my ankles are feeling in the morning. If I have another scene from "Misery" . . . . .

Yay Chachee - sounds like you are doing remarkably well after surgery. That's wonderful news. I'm sure you'll be very pleased with the results and it will take some getting used to at first. Congrats on obtaining the 35 pound star too!

Jolly that's really cool that you are trying yet another sport to round out the program. I'm sure you'll get a :censored: cardio workout with the racketball. I'm too much of a klutz myself to even attempt that so you have my admiration. I hope your knees allow you to continue.

I was watching the Olympics tonight and saw the men's gymastic team take the gold - must be lots of celebrating in your country Red. Even though they had incredible upper body strength - just watch their arms on the high rings, they are still somewhat slight in stature. So I can understand what you've been saying all along Red about body size comparisons. However, you are what you are and I hope that you will never let that discourage you from your goals. It seems everywhere I turn now I am reading that accepting yourself for who you are is so crucial to getting yourself to where you want to be. I'm still working on that - alot.

I can't stay here long tonight - got to go to the office tomorrow for "outplacement counseling" which is a joke because they never answer the really hard questions that everyone wants to know about. But it's a chance to get out. And I have to get up extra early so no going to bed late. The interview next week is in Memphis Jolly - down the road a piece from here - better winters I'm sure. Total culture difference I'm even more sure of. But right now I'll leave no stone unturned.

Off to finish the dishes and pack up the trash for tomorrow. Have a good one everyone.

Chachee, welcome back! Glad to hear things went well. Like jolly, I hope to see you here regularly real soon! Take care.

Jolly, great going on the racquetball class. You are really doing great, so much exercise, new things. Keep it up kid. You're inspiring!

'Nother quickie 'cause I saw your post happy. Nice to see some action here. You know, I left home so early this morning that I didn't see the news to hear of the men's team winning here but I was at the stable and someone there told me. Now, the highlights of the gymnastics are on TV and I've got it on in the other room. But I've got to leave for work soon. Maybe I can tape it. This is taped stuff of course. There is just so little time to watch the coverage. My God, these floor exercises are really something, aren't they and the Americans were fantastic! Those twins, the Hamm brothers, they are utterly amazing. I haven't seen the Japanese yet. I did see something on the horse last night though and they looked good.

You know, the men, especially athletes are pretty good sized. It's really the women and the fact that they are super scared to put on any muscle, any fat whatsoever. You know, you do see some heavy girls these days and they usually look very sad and lonely. I want to hug them and tell them it's OK to be different. Sometimes I see some kids in the trains who are obviously on some sports team and they look healthy and unneurotic (girls I mean). It sure is refreshing. You know, I'm not letting it bother me anymore actually. I've been having such fun in the gym and the guys there are great. Well, I'll write more later. Thanks happy, for your support. You are so sweet. Here's a cyber hug. . . did you catch it?

Gotta run.

Hey all. Just a quick post. I made it to the gym this morning before early work, and lost 2 pounds this week. Hurray.

I need to cut back on pasta for awhile. I don't want to go no carb or low carb. I just realize that pasta is a trigger for me. I always eat way more than a portion - plus then extras of the others. So, until I can measure, I need to cut back.

Got to run. Later.

Heh all. I was just excited enough to boot up my computer to report an NSV! I was looking in the mirror after the morning shower and, sucking in my abs, I actually could see, no, not any muscle yet, but the skin and fat actually went in, like making an indent instead of just sitting there as if I had absolutely no muscles under it all. It was great. It must mean I've lost some fat (because the scale doesn't budge). Hurrah. Now this is motivation. And better than the fickle scale!

OK, I know I sound like a loon but that's what I wanted to report.

Jolly, congrulations on your 2 lb loss. You are really moving along now. I see you've updated your signature. I was wondering about that and thinking it surely needs to show all the losses you've been happy. Good for you!!

Ciao!

Red - Those body changes for me are a HUGE motivator! Congrats!!

Jolly - Impressive numbers, girl!!

Chachee - Welcome back!! Sort of. :D I'm really glad you're healing SO fast, and that is indeed awesome that the doc would do the additional sculpting to get the "perfect" look. You're right, I may have to go up there for my surgery... once I win the lottery, that is. Another try on Friday. *lol*

Happy - I hope the "counseling" gives you something positive. I have lived the stress you're in, and I just have to offer a *hug* because I know how hard it is.

Well... there are good ways to lose weight, and not so good ways. I'm in the middle of a not so good way. Not intentionally, either. I've been having hints of some stomach bug for a couple weeks, and last night it turned into the full blown worshipping of the porcelain goddess. It might be the stress of Ian flying to AK next week, coupled with the situation with my silly horse's legs, added onto the car tires, plus always the money that collapsed my resistance. I just hope now that it's developed into something relatively major, it goes away quickly. I'm supposed to be taking today off work to get Ian his State ID card, do some clothes shopping for him, and meeting the vet at the stables to check out Shadow's legs. I don't have time to be sick. *sigh*

Wow, Raven, sure hope you're feeling better! Really try thinking of yourself as healthy. I know it sounds like, "Oh, yeah, right, when I'm puking my guts out!" but I mean think of what it feels like to be healthy. Think as many nice thoughts as you can, even if it is winning the lottery, or how 'bout something a little more everyday, your horse giving you a nice movement, you getting a hoof rasped just right. . . sending you healing energy . . .

REal quick post before I head out to a conference. Red - congrats on the NSV. It is nice to look in the mirror and see positive changes.Hurray for you. Raven, I hope you feel better soon. I will be sending positive vet visit vibes your way. Don't forget to e me and let me know how things go.

I have a quick NSV to report. I had a late meeting last night, then met a friend for golf practise. Afterwards, it was late, I had been up since 3:30am, and I was hungry. I thought about driving through McDonalds on the way home, but didn't and made a quick (delicious) salad when I got home. Hurray.

Have a great day all.

Hi guys! I'm back and I am "BAD"! I truly need to be back here, that's for sure!
Chach, so glad you are back and done with all of the surgery stuff, seems like that issues has been kind of hanging over your head for awhile and it's good to have it behind you.
Glad you had a few NSVs, guys. I did a quickie read of most everyone's posts and sounds like you are all doing so well.
As for me, I'm really bad off. During this time away, I let a day go by without exercise (not what I had promised myself I would do at all) and pigged out. I don't want to get on the scale at all yet. Tomorrow is a WW meeting and I wonder if I should weigh in or use my lifetime benefits of not having to weigh in for a change? We'll see what my mood is.
Vacations are great, but I am glad I am done with this stuff for the summer and in 12 days my kids will go back to school. I can get very serious about my working out and eating, yet again, now that we are home.
I am kind of hanging my head in shame over the eating stuff..... lost control, lost contact with my important 3FC buddies, didn't juornal, didn't do a darn thing.
But, I am back and ready!
Linda

Well, Derry - welcome back, and here'st o a better week.

I have a short nSV to report. I was at a conference today for work. We had a buffet lunch. I did not have any of the cole slaw or potato salad - it just didn't look that good. I had a sandwich, some fresh veggies and dip, and a cup of soup. I grabbed a cookie out of habit. I ended up giving the cookie to my boss because I just didn't feel I needed it, and "dessert" was some more tomatoes and some fresh fruit. I was full, and did not feel deprived. After work, I went to the barn. With everything going on this week, I am really short on sleep. I am in no mood to cook tonight, so I allowed myself a frozen pizza to have for supper and lunch, but did not get any other junk food. Not to bad.

Have a good night all.

Hi everyone!
Jolly, thanks for the welcome back and congrats on your NSV! :dancer: I am always proud of myself when I make GOOD choices, which I did not do on my trip.
But, here are some photos for you guys to see:
http://www.ofoto.com/BrowsePhotos.jsp?showSlide=true&Uc=b1dqjnvj.9kljio5r&Uy=-4y4td8&Ux=1
There are some of ME there, I am on the left with my two kids and in the green jacket in a single photo, we were smiling after pigging out at this really great seafood place right on the water, whoops! I actually had lobster bisque and salad, at least I had lite dressing! Wonder how many points was in the bisque, is was SOOOO creamy and I could taste the sherry in it, quite the luxury for me!
You can see The Breakers which is one of the awesome Newport Mansions. I figure I earned an entire point by taking the tour around that huge place. I was wishing that I lived back in those days, but considering who I am vs. who the Vanderbuilts were (who built that place in 1885), I'd have probably have been the maid. Oh well. I was dreaming of long Victorian dresses and parties walking around that place, imagining I was like Cinderella pulling up in my coach to be greeted at the door by the charming bulter...... nice to have dreams, right? Of course, in those dreams I was 20 years younger and very THIN! Twenty years ago, I actually WAS thin! ;)
Today, though, it's back to reality and I will go get weighed in at 9:30 am..... have to face the music. I dared to get on the scale this morning and think I might have gained about 1 pound, hard to say. I will try to journal and get right back into my usual workout, etc. Vacation is over!
Linda in rainy NH

Wow, Derry. YOur trip sounds wonderful. I know my company owns one of the Pabst mansions. Even though it was built in the early 1900's - I fantasize about Scarlet O'Hara type ball gowns and suitors whenever I am there. It is incredible.

I upgraded my weight program today. Small changes - I think the trainer wants me to get used to it before making any more changes. Hey, whatever works. He did add in some inner and outer thigh machines that should just kill. Yeah.

Oh well. Off to work. Golf practise again tonight - the outing is tomorrow. Yikes. Have a great day all.

Back after a very nasty bout of stomach yucks. Tuesday night/Wednesday morning was spent throwing up. I started feeling almost human again around 6 or so last night.

Oh and of course I am on my period, too.

:rolleyes:

I did make it to the vet appointment for Shadow... he took lots of x-rays of that fetlock, we'll see what happens next. I should hear from him in a couple days regarding the results.

Ian has a scheduled flight out on Wednesday the 25th in the afternoon. I'm excited for him, but geez I'm going to miss the little bugger. He'll be gone about a month - give or take a week or so. It's a long drive, and I hope they take their time, do silly fun stuff, and just get to know each other again.

Hi Ladies,

I'm back at work, on half days. Still very busy and not a lot of computer time, so I don't have time to individually post.

I'm going to try these half days for today and Friday, hoping to get back to fully time next week. My mom is still here until the 31st, so I want to take advantage of that.

Feeling good, no pain pills taken for a few days now, so it's all healing up just nicely!!

Hope everyone is doing well.

Chach

Good evening everyone!
Well, I went to ww today and had my weigh in, gained .8 - not as bad as I thought it would be, but still a gain. I'll do better, for sure, next week!
It's really hard to get back to reality right away, Lancelot is having a horrid day at work (spoke to him midday) and I feel so badly that he puts up with this stuff for me and the kids. I am going out surfing the net as soon as I finish this update to help look for another job for him. There's got to be something!
Chach, you are really on a roll getting back to work so quickly. Do people at work know what you did, just curious? You never said what your mom said when she saw you, Chach, I'll bet she was amazed!
Raven, so sorry you are not well. Didn't you go through this last week or the week before? Or, was it someone else?
Well, it's off to look for jobs....
Linda

quick fly by as we are getting picked up at the airport in 9 hours :yikes: and I haven't been to bed yet. Always behind no matter how hard I try! My apologies for not posting. Hope you all have a good weekend, I'll be back Tuesday. Thanks for your good wishes with the interview.

Good morning all. I just have time for a quick post. I have my golf outing with work today. Yikes! Waht was I thinking.

Chachee, hope things are going well with work and healing. Happy, good luck with the interview. Derry, good luck with husband's job hunt. Raven, hope you are feeling better.

Here's to a great weekend for all of us :)

Jolly, good luck with the golf outing - I take it that this is your first time golfing? Hope you get a foursome with people like yourself. Golfers are something else!

To the rest of you - have a great weekend, see you Tuesday.

Thanks Happy. NO, not my first time golfing. Just my first time in a long while. I am not very good. The folks I was with were a lot of fun though. Also poor golfers, so it was a blast. I may actually try again.

Have a great weekend.

Good luck, from me, on the gold thing too! I'm much more of a miniature golf person!
Just reporting in, I'm working hard right now to stay on program.
Have just joined a challenge to lose 10 pounds in a month on the ww general section of this web site. I wonder if I can truly do this?
But, for two days I have not gone over my points allowance for the day, no flex points used! I have drank water, worked out, journalled and done everything right for a change. We'll see if that nasty .8 that I put on this week comes off and then MORE, I hope!
I have "ordered" that my family will not go out to dinner this evening and that will help me as I just can't keep in control when I eat out, it seems. I don't mind cooking if I have a goal in mind!
Linda

:devil: In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth And populated the Earth with broccoli and cauliflower and spinach, and green, yellow and red vegetables of all kinds so that man and woman would live long and healthy lives.



Then Satan created Ben & Jerry's and Krispy Kreme donuts. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And man said, "Yeah." And woman said, "and another one with Sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds. And Satan smiled.



Then God created the healthful yogurt so that woman might keep the figure that man found so fair. Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane and combined them. And woman went from size 6 to size 14. So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." And Satan countered with Thousand Island Dressing, buttery croutons, and garlic toast on the side. And man and woman unfastened their belts following the repast.



God then said, "I have sent you heart-healthy vegetables, and olive oil in which to cook them. And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter. And man gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof. God created a light, fluffy white cake, named it "Angel Food Cake" and said, "It is good." Satan then created chocolate cake and named it "Devil's Food."



God then brought forth running shoes so that his children might lose those extra pounds. And Satan gave them cable TV with a remote control so man would not have to toil while changing the channels. And man and woman laughed and cried before the flickering blue tube, and gained more pounds. Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition. And Satan peeled off the healthful skin, sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them. And man gained pounds. God gave them lean beef so that man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created McDonald's and its 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then said, "Want fries with that?" And man replied, "Yeah! And super-size them." And Satan said, "It is good." And man went into cardiac arrest.



God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery. Then Satan created HMOs. It never ends.

Oh my gosh, Derry. I laughed so hard. Where did you come up with that? What a hoot! And probably more true than we care to admit. YOu made my morning.

Well, I am off to clean, the gym, lunch with mom, the barn, then who knows. I have to try and get a workout in tomorrow before we go to the Renaissance Faire. i just hope I see the good looking guys in kilts - not the misguided ones. Hey, for some of us, clothes just are our friends.

Have a great day all.

Good morning people. Oh well, it's still before dawn here but I'm up and have to be out soon. Coffee to kickstart. Not good but the only way these days. Sorry to have been MIA. Things have just been so hectic. I was really good for about three days, really kicked butt at the gym and watched the eating. I lost fat. The scale didn't budge but I could see I had less fat on me and it felt great. I was finally seeing results. Then yesterday it all came crashing down (it's the three-day cycle again). I ate junk and a lot of it and felt awful doing it, wondering why, oh why I do that. I was really tired, really wanted to just sleep but had to work. Actually, though, I could have taken a little nap at lunch break but was thinking, oh, what a waste of time and walked instead. I have to learn to schedule in true down-time.

Well, gotta run. It sounds like things are looking up with everyone. Will be in touch. Take care. :wave:

Hey all. Red, not everything is looking up. I don't know if it is hormones, being overtired, or what, but I am feeling kind of depressed again. I feel fat, bloaty, exhausted, everything seems like a struggle, and I don't want to do anything. I don't want to be doing the two step back thing again, so - I will send vibes your way, if you send some mine. Maybe I should try the nap idea . . . .

Hope everyone else is having a good weekend.

Jolly, it's been a bad day for me but I'm not going to call it a total loss. I just had a minor NSV and that was the fact that I stopped a binge, just halted it and said no more. Of course, this came at the far end of many a calorie but normally I'd have kept going till I went to sleep. Not this time, I even wrote it all down. I said, just stop it, right now, not tomorrow, not the day after, right now.

Jolly, sometimes we do feel fat, bloated, exhausted and like the world has got a personal vendetta out on us. I felt like that today and yesterday as well. Work problems sparked it off but it started to color everything, as usual. Then I said, self, this is what it's about. Look that fat feeling, bloated feeling, whatever, definitely not Happy Feeling smack in the face and say, "get you ugly A outta here!"

Come on, jolly, you can do it. I'm sending you the necessary energy. You CAN do this. You've BEEN doing this. Just keep it up! No more wingeing out of you! Kick to the rear!

Jolly, someone e-mailed me that thing about God and Satan.... I take no credit for it, but just had to share it! Writer unknown, but certainly a good thing to read! ;)
I certainly know what it's like for both you guys (Red and Jolly) with the feeling bloated, fat and depressed thing. Seems I go through times like that too. I have two or three fantastic days and then blow it. Why can't I keep on track?
We all need to keep sending good vibes and energy in each other's direction!
=^^= That is cat sign for energy today.... my cats always seem to be able to eat what they only need and never more, I marvel at that. They exercise and play alternately with their cat naps and stay at a good weight and are always seemingly in a good and affectionate mood.
So, today, I need to think like a cat!
=^^=
Linda

Hey all. I hope everyone is enjoying the last few bits of their weekend, or (Red) the start of a wonderful work week.

I appreciate all the vibes, and send them back to you. Though, Derry, after reading your last post, I have the strangest urge to lift my legs in funny positions and lick myself. *Cough cough* Oops, excuse the hairball. :rofl:

I had a wonderful time at the Renaissance Faire today. I did make it to the gym before hand for a workout. I did lots of walking at the Faire. I packed a lunch, and the only thing I had at the Faire was part of a Bloomin Onion, and a Chai tea. I wasn't trying to avoid anything, I just didn't feel like eating a lot. So, yesterday was a bad food day, but it was just one day. Back on track now.

Here's to a wonderful week.

Just a quick post... not sure what this week is going to be like. I *think* the stomach bug from **** is leaving my system, I feel pretty close to "normal" today. I'm not going to push it, though. This week is still going to be about getting enough rest and eating lightly and healthy, not to mention getting enough in the liquid department. I'm not going to push physical activity at all.

Ian leaves Wednesday afternoon, so if you don't hear much from me for the next several days... well, I'm busy and preoccupied with that, so please bear with me. Hope ya'll had a good weekend, and that Monday is going well so far. :)

Jolly, you are soooo funny! Loved the hairball reference! My thinking like a cat didn't help much yesterday, as I dug into the flex points again, but it still was a satisfying day as I got to spend some time in my sewing room. I am trying to create a music themed wall hanging quilt for two dear friend who will be married in a few weeks. Both are composers and musicians.... hope it comes out ok and I can get it done!
We also went to a car show/cruise night at an ice cream place and I had soft serve chocoate ice cream, that's where the flex points came into play. I am glad I went and soft serve is pretty save as it's made with 1% or 2% milk vs. cream, can't rember weather it's 1 or 2%, though.
Raven, glad you are feeling a bit better. Is Ian your son? Where is he going? College?
This morning, the day before weigh in, I am going to be "perfect" in terms of my ww program. I am so looking forward to my meeting tomorrow as I want to know all about their new program. Maybe it's just what I need to get moving along with my wieght loss journey?
My own scale dipped to 148 this morning, but it was with no clothes and not having breakfast yet, but I was enthused! Maybe tomorrow's WI will be a loss?
Linda

Good morning all. I am feeling pretty frustrated this morning. A work situation that I said I could help out with, that nobody bothered to call me about. I know I am more frustrated than I should be, but I really want to go get a big bag of chocolate. Eat first, scream later. I am munching on some low fat pringles, but if that keeps me from going screaming to the store for chocolate - so be it. I guess I should think more like a cat - be totally oblivious to the lower human life forms I am forced to share oxygen with.

Keep your fingers crossed for me, and have a great day.

Hi Ladies,

Back to work for me, trying to make it 3/4 of the day! Hopefully working back into full days by the end of the week.

Overdid it this weekend, so was over-tired, but am going to try and keep that under control with not thinking I can do more than I can. Just a hard habit to break--doing more than we think we can. Had to take pain pills this weekend, which is bad because I was off them earlier in the week. Mental note to self--give myself a break and take it easy.

To each of you individually, keep up the good hard fight and I hope to start individually posting once time allows it more.

Happy Monday.

Chach

Hi people. Sorry not to be posting much. I've had some real hairy days at work that had me believing I had no choice but to accept an unacceptable yet-another change in my schedule AND an increase in my work or quit. The whole way I was informed of this was a total insult as well, threats and intimidation. This is from an immediate boss whom I have never liked. He is quite incompetent. But I have links to a higher-up and that has kept me there in the hopes that the paper will return to the fun place it was years ago. But, Friday I really wanted to just do the take your job and shove it thing. I was sooo close to doing it too. And it felt great. However, I don't really want to leave the office. I really like newspaper work. That's the catch.

Anyhow, the superior who I talk to a lot is someone I have looked to for help for 15 years whenever such times came up. He came through for me again. It's not that he promised me the moon or anything, it's just he knows how to talk to me and make me feel like the valuable worker I know I am. Ah, heck, I'm just a sucker for him probably.

That and the fact that my inquiries for help on a work project for the paper that involves a government organization here were going unreplied to just had me feeling like I was being ignored on all fronts. But today, too, finally (after a good three weeks) a call came in from the top dog's secretary saying they needed more time to think things over. So, it's nothing really but it's better than the silence I had been getting. This is racing related and the big races will be starting up soon. It's all related, the racing, the newspaper work. And the big thing is I have to support the horse or find a place for her if I can't. This is what kept me from quitting and then my superior's support.

I should be elated and I do feel relief and some actual happy thoughts floating around now but I also have been eating because of this and just feel a little down about it all and the fact that I'm still kind of vulnerable to outside things instead of being the rock of determination that I wish I were. I have so much to do all the time. And the thing that suffers always is the eating, or the fact that I overeat. I mean, why!? Why do I bother to overeat if I'm so busy? I hear skinny people saying they have no time to eat all the time. I'm the opposite. No time means stick an excess of food, junk and what not in my face. When I can relax and have down time I NEVER overeat. It must be some sort of anxiety trigger that has a direct connecting to my hand and mouth.

That said, I had a glimmer of a feeling of improvement in my riding today and feel good about that. I keep thinking, I must think of how I want things to be, not about how they are. I've been doing this and maybe it's what has been turning things around. I mean, it's so hard but I just have to have faith I think. The eating, the work, the work and private projects, the riding, I have to keep thinking what I want. Boy, last week I was seeing the fat just melt off. Then, the attack at work happened and I just became all negative again. And in started going the food. The workouts slacked off. . . .Oh well, I'm getting ready to get to the gym now.

I gotta run. Just wanted to report in. Like Chachee, I hope to be up and posting individually again soon. But here's wishing you all the best! :wave:

Hey all. Just a quick morning post. Chachee, glad you are back with us. Red, we seem to be cycling together lately. So, here are some good work vibes for you. I also had a very stressful work day yesterday. Some things came up which really made me feel stabbed in the back and very insecure. I too was battling those urges to overeat. It is not easy. Stress definitely sends me back to old eating patterns. I am doing a lot of thinking and praying. So, here's to things improving on the work front, for both of us.

Everyone else, hope you jump in here soon. We miss you.

Just a quick fly-by ...

Jolly, Red - I'm so sorry things have been crappy for you guys at work. I know that feeling well, and it can totally rip apart the rest of your life. I watched my Dad go through that for so many years, and I promised myself I wouldn't do that to myself. I'm pretty cool with the job I have now, at least I feel appreciated by my immediate coworkers, if not the people who hand out the money. But it isn't really enough, and that's why I'm fighting to follow my dreams. Who knows what will happen, but at least I'm trying. I really hope things get better for both of you.

Chach - Glad to see you're doing better, but as usual, you pushed it too hard. Imagine that? ;) Stop it, and let your body heal, goofball. The world won't stop if you slow down for a few days.

Linda - I know that I always have to plan in for desserts or treats here and there. If I don't, I feel deprived and go off the deep end. Big ugly backlash with that and it's not worth it. My son is 12, and he's going up to Alaska to meet his dad, and they're both driving back to GA. I'm divorced, and his father has been promising for about 10 years to move to GA (very long story) to be with his kids, and now he's finally following through. It's Ian's big adventure. My anxiety is increasing as the time for him to fly gets closer, no big surprise there. At least it's non-stop. I won't be relaxed till I get the "everything's ok" call from up there, and I know he's hooked up with his dad in the airport. I've had kids fly alone before (my daughter) but it doesn't get any easier. Too many things.... ANYway *phoo*

Yeah. So ... :wave:

Hi Ladies,

Back for more today. Went home at 1:00 yesterday and just relaxed. I know, it's hard to believe, but I did. I cooked a nice dinner for all of us. I really should have been sleeping and taking a nap, but those dang Olympics keep me up and watching them. I know, it's sad, but I'm addicted to them!

Raven: Yep, I pushed, but not tooo extremely bad. (Sounds like an excuse, huh?). I am taking it easy now, hopefully having a date night with hubby before my mom leaves in a week. I think a movie and dinner. I'm so grateful to have her here, but also ready for her and her bad eating habits to go home for awhile.

Red: I understand what you said about people forgetting to eat. How is that possible? It just doesn't happen with me. I can forget a lot of things, but eating is definitely not one of them. Glad to see a glimmer of hope as far as the job is concerned.

Jolly: Sorry that happened to you at work. It's amazing to me that some people can only be happy by being mean to other people. I just don't understand it.

Hi to Linda, Happy, Hippy and Lucky. (And anyone else I forgot.)

I'm getting back into it....just takes a little bit of time.

Chach

Jolly, think like a cat! You can do it! The work situation would make my two felines totally oblivious. What would they do if they were frustrated or stressed, actually? They would probably want more affection, so maybe you need some hugs?
Red, I feel for you and know how Lancelot is going through something similar. One thing to be reminded of, though, is that this situation seems out of your control so you have to learn ways to deal, or move on careerwise. You CAN take pleasure in what you CAN control, which is what goes into your mouth! They cannot change that, don't let them! Do get MAD and in a vengeful way think that they can't get the better of you by being in control of your entire life, only those hours you are there. For the rest of the time, your life is yours and if you let them control your emotions during that time, then they win! So, take control girl take pleasure in your successes with riding, exercise and eating healthy! You can!
Raven, now I understand about your son and why you would be worrying! He'll be fine, I'm sure! That sure does sound like an adventure. I do hope having their dad closer is a good thing for your kids. Maybe you can share having the kids spend weekends with their dad and give yourself some well deserved free time for yourself! I don't envy divorced people at all, and am glad that my Lancelot and I are together, but I do envy that the divorced people I know seem to get more free time as their kids spend overnights with their X. So, maybe you will benefit somehow! My brother in law and his current wife "farm out" both of their kids to their X spouses and have "date weekends" now and then, I get jealous of that. When my kids were younger, in particular, I was joined at the hip!
So, my big news for the day is that I went to the meeting and found out about the new ww program, the Core Plan! Plus, I weighed in and lost 2.2 pounds! That was only in five days, as I weighed in last Thrusday, a really good weigh in for me!!!!! :cool: The new program is a big change. I am going to try it, but I am scared as pizza uses flex points, essentially! Also, at least for the first week, we were not told that we can earn extra points by exercising, but we were told to step up our activity level and try to earn 4 points a day - wow! I don't think I have TIME for that, but will see if I can run vs. walk on the treadmil or something, maybe?
You get 35 points a week and then can eat any foods you want and as much (within reason) as you want from a listing of core foods. I don't like that bread is not a core food, yet oatmeal, any non sugar added cereal (like grapenuts or shredded wheat) are on the list. REAL eggs are core foods, though! Yummy! Fruit is a core food as well, so I can eat more fruit - I would bypass fruit, often, due to the points and have veggies instead. What a luxury! Beans and other legumes are on the list, but baked beans count as points unless they are vegetarian baked beans, etc. Split pea soup is on the core list as well as lentil soup and clear broth vegetable soups.
All meats that are lean are on the list, but if you add sauces, marinates (with fat), breading, etc. it adds points. Fat free cheeses are on the list, but even low fat cheese uses points. I am totally thrilled that Canadian Bacon is on the list of core foods, I can have a scrambled egg, a small amount of plain grits (I like them but they were too high in points for me to want to spend my points on) and a few pieces of Canadina Bacon tomorrow morning. This is like a "kid in the candy store" for me to have a REAL egg, especially! Wow! I am worrying that I might gain as I feel like a prisoner who has been taken out of the shackles????
You do have more freedoms, but you have more restrictions in some ways too. I am going to do this for one week and evaluate. They say that if you've been on a plateau, you can break through with this. Some ww people are saying that you can switch back and fourth from one week to the next (but for a week at a time) from the Core vs. the Flexpoint program.
We'll see how things go! I'll be reporting in! My leader said she lost 8 pounds in three weeks, but then went back to flexpoints as she is a chocoholic and couldn't deal with only 35 flexpoints. The points system allows for more chocolate items! With this system, there is no counting other than keeping track of your flex points per week, no journals, etc.
The core program does allow the flexpoints and I figure I might end up using many of my 35 flex points on ww chocolate ice cream treats! I also found out that sugar free, fat free, chocolate pudding is on the core list - so that will be tonight's dessert and I won't be using any flexies!
By the way, all ice cream products are not on the core listing other than one ww soft serve sugar free ice cream that I've never seen in a store!
All of the ww frozen entrees are NOT on the core listing, I hope they come up with a way to evaluate those so that maybe not all the points need to be counted towards your 35 flexpoints a week. We'll see next week, apparently there will be more info given out for the next 8 weeks.
Hey, I was wondering if one could MAKE flour out of oatmeal in a blender for example and try to make some sort of bread with that if oatmeal is a core food? Interesting thought at least!
Linda

Hey all. Derry, your new ww program sounds interesting. I made it to TOPS last night, and was down 2 pounds on their scale. Not counting it for my "official" weight. I still use my Monday morning weigh in at the gym for that. I will be doing that next MOnday. Didn't make it this Monday, due to racquetball. I decided after this MOnday, to get my morning workout in regardless, and just go back to the gym later for the lesson. I just feel better when I workout in the mornings.

Speaking of, I didn't get to the gym this morning. I was just feeling tired, cranky (all reasons I SHOULD have worked out), and the book I was reading was so good. I packed my bag though, so I should be able to go tonight after I ride. I do have an NSV to report. I have been feeling very stressed this week. Fantasizing about chocolate. Brach's stars, large candy bars, gas station size bags of M&Ms. I have not given in and gotten any. And this morning, when the urge started I said fine, if that is what I really want, and think I need, fine. I sat and looked at all the candy by the checkout, and realized no, it was not what I wanted. So, no candy or junk.

Hope everyone has a good day.

Jolly, what a great NSV! Wow!
I'm feeling absolutely charged up today about this new ww core program. I am absolutely gleeful that I might break through this barrier and lose more weight!
This morning I made this gorgeous omlet and wasn't "cheating" and it was great! Wow!
Today, I feel like the pounds are just melting off me.... literally feel like dancing!
I hope the rest of you are having a great day like I am!
Linda

Hi Ladies,

Real quickly, I am back to full time, as of today. I'll see how it goes, but I really need to be conditioning myself back to full time. My mom leaves on Tuesday, so it's crunch time! The afternoon really isn't that bad, as I take such a late lunch I only have 2.5 hours left to work once I return.

Linda: I am going to weigh in next week, so I will be getting the new program info then. I read about it on a "leak" website about a month ago. Sounds interesting, but the only thing that scares me is the idea of "as much food as you want" concept from the core foods. I thought the big push was portion control. Maybe I didn't read all of it correctly. We shall see. Sounds like just the thing you need to help you over your plateau. Congrats on the loss.

Jolly: What can I say other than way to go on being OP. You are doing so well and have so many things going the right way. It's so great to hear about!

Raven: You need me to check up on Ian? Let me know, since he'll be in our neighborhood! How are you doing with all of this? Seems like you have talked about it for so long, it's hard to believe it's really here.

Hi to Red, Happy and Hippy. Hope things are going better with the job fronts for all of you.

Happy Wednesday.

Chach

Chach, good that you are well enough to be back full time. I'm impressed with how quickly this all seems to have gone! How do you feel about yourself when you look in the mirror now - are you happy? That is the most important part in all of this!
I know what you mean about being worried about as much food as you want, I am as well. Quite honestly, for these two days I am doing both plans together. I am making sure the points range of the core foods fits into my point allowance for the old plan, so you could say I am a bi-plan person???? I feel more in control doing it this way for now as I am worrying very much about losing control, going wild with the freedom and not being intelligent. I am so welcoming this change is what I thought I could eat and couldn't eat, though. I am approaching it differently now.
In fact, I was on So. Beach and Atkins for awhile and some of the core foods remind me of these, yet the focus is not on low carb, it's on a totally fresh and healthy diet. I just know I will want pizza, though and maybe some fast food now and then so that is when I might fail at the core plan and trade back to the other plan!
Linda

Hey all. I had another "interesting" day. Confrontation with one of my staff. I take that stuff too personally, and instead of pulling out the constructive stuff, feel like I am a complete failure. Things to work on, I know. But, I have gotten through it without going for the chocolate. I went to the gym tonight, as I didn't make it off the couch this morning. I couldn't get myself to do the whole aerobic I had planned, so did half, then did weights (which I hadn't planned). So I felt that evened out. Plus, I did not find an "excuse" to go to the store afterwards. I told myself i could binge on whatever I wanted, as long as it was already AT HOME. That leaves popcorn (with butter though) and sugar free pudding or fudgicles. So, that was a save, I think.

Anyway. Four days off now. Much needed, but will be busy. Have a good one all.

Hi everyone,
The out of town interview went pretty well, I will get more feedback tomorrow. We really liked the south, more than we thought we would and would consider moving down there. I also have a second interview tomorrow for a place that is local to me. Lots going on right now and I need to devote my time and attention elsewhere.

I probably won't get back here until Sunday or so but know that I am thinking of all of you. :grouphug:

jolly, good going with the work stress save. happy, glad to hear the interview went well.

everyone else, best of luck to you all. I'm still in the dredges. Will try to lift myself out of them and report in in the not too distant future!

Happy, hope the job thing goes well for you, I didn't realize you were planning a possible move! Best of luck with this!
Still using the new core plan and I think I might do quite well with it. I am eating out tomorrow, though, so that could be dangerous.
Linda

Hi Ladies

Back to work full time again. A little tiring, but feels good to be almost back to "normal", whatever that means.

Big busy weekend planned--the Fair, brunch, date night with hubby, shopping with mom before she leaves, etc. I'm going to take it easy, but will be busy.

Happy: I am sending you more good interview and work vibes. If you move "South", where would that be? Closer to Raven so I can visit both of you next year??

Red: Good luck lifting yourself out. Hey, that should count as a workout, shouldn't it??

Linda: We'll see how the new plan goes. I believe I will continue on Flex, but you never know. Nice to have two eating plans to switch between, which really works for some people.

Going to Quiznos for lunch today. I love their veggie sandwich. I eat their small one, and it's really good and only 7 points. Have some baked chips with it and some peppers on the side. Yummy filling lunch with lots of fiber, not too much fat or calories. I'm saving those up for the Elephant Ear I plan on eating at the Fair. My one indulgence. :)

Happy Thursday.

Chach

Hey all. Real quick post, before I rush out again. Happy, good luck with the interviews. Chachee, I think it is so cool you have date night with your husband. Red, I have joined you in the pits. All this week's stress caught up with me today, and I binged on just about everything. I feel awful now. Stressed, fat and broke. Sigh. Oh well. Tomorrow is another day.

Chach, date night sounds good to me as well. I think I need something like that. One thing we do is go out for a drive together on the weekends or on a nice evening. My father in law GAVE us an antique car and we take it out together, and it's always fun for the two of us and we have some special times together.
I am not feeling fat, Jolly, but I can relate to the broke and stressed right now. Just don't know where the funds are going to come from to pay all the bills right now. My husband got a raise a few months ago and I think we are worse off than we were ever before, I don't get it! Actually, I do get it. Prices are way up on everything, even ww and all the healthier choices of foods cost more! Why is it that the junk is cheaper?
Just got back from Freshman Orientation night at the high school with my daughter. She is a typical teen, I guess, and treated me like I was embarrassing her and cut me off short whenever I was trying to speak. On the way home, she lit into me and when we got home, I grounded her. She did come out and apologize, but now I am way too stressed to go to bed.
If I were the OLD me, I would be heading for the kitchen.... the new me did have a glass of milk to calm my nerves (skim milk!) and I am going to try to go to sleep soon.
Kids! If it's not one kid, it's the other.... oh well. I do love them, but do like some respect once in awhile. I really felt my daughter and I were making great strides in becoming more "friends" (as I would like) and that both of our efforts with ww were helping us to be more understanding, and closer to each other. I was really hoping she would be a bit "nicer" to me, but I guess not. Well, at least tonight she wasn't nice!
I must understand, though, that she IS, after all, 13 and being that age and starting high school and worrying about having kids like her, etc. is so stressful. Finding your way around a big school and having to deal with peer pressure, rules and teachers is hard. I was exhausted when we got home, as we had a long meeting in the auditorium and had to walk to all her classes, finding our way around, etc. It's a pretty big school and her class has 460 students in it, there will be more than 1500 kids in this school and it is at "full" capacity. They are talking split sessions and other innovative ways to deal right now. This high school was just expanded two or three years ago and they projected it would be good for several years and they are now astounded that it is totally full. Her Spanish class will have 31 students, yikes! I recalled many of my own school days and worries, so I guess I can't find total fault with her for being so MEAN to me, but I do not like to be treated like I have no brains and as if I am her enemy. She may not realize it, but there will never be such person in her life who would be totally on her side as I am, there will never be anyone who loves her more than me (and her dad too, of course). No one would fight harder FOR her and work harder to help her, probably, in her entire life. Everything parents do (if they are decent parents, at least) is with the ultimate goal of helping their kids. Yet, it's like she slapped me in the fact with it tonight....
Such hard times to be a teenager, but I hope my own kid can treat me with respect. We don't always have to agree, but I am not a moron.
Oh well, sorry for spouting off guys.... just a rough night.
Linda

Hey all. Today is a new day. I WILL make good food choices. I will not fall back on old eating habits. I will not medicate my stress disorder with food. I will take good care of myself. Yesterday is done.

I started my good choices by getting up at 4:20, on a day off, to get to the gym for an aerobics class before I go help out at the horse show. Am I good, or what? Sorry, just needed that pat on the back.

Derry, as a former teenage daughter, be patient through these years. I know, i never felt like my mom and I spoke the same language when I was growing up. "She just didn't understand me!" It actually wasn't until her and my father divorced, and I forced her into counseling with me, that we developed a good relationship. Each mother-daughter relationship is different, I know, but . . . . Hopefully she will "get it" much sooner than I did.

Have a good day all.

So Linda... did you tell HER all that, too? She's the one who needs to hear it. ;) Not that we're not hear to listen, mind you.

I am so out of it.

Tired doesn't even begin to touch it. I need this weekend SO bad, and if I hadn't taken so much time off in the last couple weeks, I'd call in sick today. Yep, return of the tummy yucks. Poor Nick had it attack her at the stables last night really unexpectedly, and it cut short her plans for riding Eve. At least this time doesn't seem as bad as the last time. I guess we'll see. I just wonder if it isn't something we're eating or something.

And there are other things going on which are just discouraging. I'm sorry if I haven't been posting much, just don't feel like typing it all out.

I hope this weekend gives me some time to recharge my batteries, and I hope everyone else has a really nice one, too.

Hello Ladies

Linda: Along with Jolly, let me chime in as reformed teenage girl. I think growing up you don’t want to admit you need your mom, and get easily embarrassed when she’s with you, but there is nothing like knowing she is there for you. I was bad with my mom, not as bad as a lot of girls were, but I look back now and wonder why I acted that way sometimes. I think there are things that just bug me about my mom, and they would with any person I was a friend with who acted that way. The thing is that when it’s your mom, then you think the other “cool” kids will look at you and think that is the way you will act. Granted, you probably did nothing wrong, it’s just the stress of a new school and the new kids and the entire new situation. Puberty is a bi*** and going through it in a new school with new situations and not really knowing how to act anyway is so tough. I feel for you and know I am here. I see both sides of it so clearly now and wish I hadn’t acted that way towards her back then. I am making up for it now, and truly enjoy her company. (She still bugs me sometimes, though! Heehee)

Jolly: Sorry to hear you had a bad day yesterday. Sounds like you are making up for it today. Great job on the exercise and getting your focus back. Have a wonderful weekend, as I know you will, and enjoy yourself and your horsie!!

Raven: I know you are stressing and probably will be for awhile. Remember my offer—I’m here if you need me to check up on him or anything. The flash floods we are having probably doesn’t help your stress level, huh? It’s pretty bad up here. Didn’t know if you knew that or not.

Alrighty, I got about half of my birthday and Christmas shopping done yesterday. Just need to do a bit of wrapping and some cards and wait for my next paycheck to finish it off. I know, don’t hate me because I’m super organized and anal about getting stuff out early. Raven can tell you that if you don’t get your shopping and shipping done by the time the PFD hits in October, it’s tough to get anything done!!

Date night tonight. I think we will see either Open Waters or Suspect Zero. Going to the Mall just to walk around and enjoy each other’s company! Amazing!

Happy Friday!

Chach

Goodness, just typed this long post and clicked on the wrong key on my keyboard and lost it all in one click - what the heck happened???? Hope I don't hit that key again by accident, yikes!
Thanks for your thoughts and support guys! I did have a talk with Jamie this morning and cleared the air a bit. Told her I didn't expect to be treated like dirt, but also told her I understand what it's like to be starting high school and that I know she is under a great deal of pressure, etc.
So, things went a little better with her today.
I'm a mess, though, as I went to a wake tonight for a dear friend who passed away this week, I can't believe this guy is gone. He was very special to me and died of a heart attack at 62, way too young. I felt really badly as he had Parkinson's and had been in a nursing home for over a year and I had NOT gotten in to see him at all. I must remind you all, and myself, that if you know a person that is in a place like that, don't expect them to last forever waiting for you to get around to visiting them - just get your butt in there! I'm sad I lost his friendship and really mad at myself for not being a better friend during his stay there. I should have been a better friend. I hope he knows that now.
So, now for some GOOD news, I have to get off the morbid track.....
I met an old friend for lunch today. It was great to see her, it's been 17 years! She and I met when we were both nine years old and now we are both 49, so it's been a 40 year friendship! We spent hours together catching up on old times. We have been e-mailing each other for a long time and know what's going on in each other's lives, at least, but have not been face to face and had a conversation since my 16 year old's baby shower! She just finished losing 30 pounds, using ww points, by the way! I just lost my 12 pounds and we both congratulated each other on that! So, being quite aware of our situations, we had NSVs! We ordered our meals in the place like perfect angels! I even had a baked potato with NO butter or margarine on it for the first time in my entire life, and you know what??? It tasted good with no butter, that was a good learning experience! I had grilled chicken, salad with ff dressing and we both asked our server to "hold the bisquits"! This is probably one of the first times I have ever asked for no bread basket and been able to resist! Cool!
Some good things, some bad things today. I dealt well with stress, mourning and a celebration lunch.... could it be I'm getting this ww program finally crammed through this "thick skull" of mine?
Linda

Hello all. Chachee, I admire your organizational skills. I wish I were better about buying gifts when I see then on sale, etc. part of it is having gift exchanges and not knowing who you will get. Ah well. Face it, I must be getting some reward out of the stress of Dec. 24th shopping. Derry, glad you talked to your daughter. Also, congrats on the NSVs with your friend - way to go. Sorry to hear about your other friend. It is a reminder to live each day, and to show your love to your friends. Raven, I hope you get the chance to recharge your batteries this weekend. We miss you.

Well, off to day two of the horse show. Squeezing a hair cut in there as well - going shorter. If I don't like it - it will grow. Have a good day all.

Thanks, Jolly! I was admiring Chachee's organization as well. I have a few major priorities for this coming paycheck (including hoping to finally pay off ALL credit card debt) and then by the next check, I am thinking seriously of starting my holiday shopping early. My husband's side of the family are really BIG spenders and one of the reasons we end up with credit card debt every year is Christmas. My family is not that way, however, "when in Rome" is truly what I must do with his family.... they won't change because I disaprove.
Today I am taking a morning "off" in a little while and my husband and I are going to hop in the car and go off on a yard sale adventure, which we enjoy. I'll be doing my workout later on. We are also contemplating a trip to Hampton Beach NH later on today, it's supposed to be about 100 degrees here today so it will be packed, like sardines, so we probably might re-think that choice and do something else. I was thinking about doing some of my exercise, though, in the water and walking on the beach - but with a mob scene, it might not be the peaceful scene I would anticipate.
Will be totally "on program" today, though, my mind is made up and I will see that scale move at my weigh in on Tuesday!
Go girls!!!!
Linda

Good morning all. Back at work after a crazy weekend. But, short week this week - sort of. I am doing a third shift Thursday night, so will have Friday off. Have next Monday off due to Labor day, and a 3 day week the week after that, as I am getting my dog spayed. I can live with that.

I went to the gym to work out this morning, then will have my lesson tonight. I had another loss. 2 pounds for the last two weeks. Can't complain. Hope I have a loss at TOPS tomorrow too, as I am up for loser of the month.

Hope everyone had a good weekend, and is doing well.

Hello Ladies,

Jolly, big congrats on your loss. How does your new haircut look? Did you have fun with your show this weekend?

Linda, glad you had a chance to talk to Jamie about the situation. Now she knows what is and isn't acceptable, even at her teenage stage. Sounds like you had a wonderful visit with your friend. Sorry to hear about your other friend. It's always tough when you have those "wish I could have" thoughts when a friend/family/loved one passes on. Gotta enjoy them when they are here, and it's tough sometimes with our busy lives.

I'd be happy to be your personal shoppers. Just love doing that thing. I always go home, add up how much I would have spent, had I bought everything regular price, and then add up how much I saved. The best one was about a year ago at Sears. I spent $115 and saved over $300. They are, by the way, having a huge Summer clearance blow out, so if you have a Sears by you, go check it out. All their clearance stuff is an additional 50% off. I got some cute sweat pants for $5.00

My mom leaves tomorrow and it's time. If my recovery had been worse, then I would be saying something else, but her horrible eating habits are starting to affect my eating habits and it's not a good thing. I'm ready for my house to be back to normal and back to being the only woman in it! I love her to death, but it's time for her to leave.

Okay, here's to a great week. I'm off Tuesday, Friday and next Monday, so if I'm a little MIA, that is why.

Happy Monday.

Chach

Hi people. I'm kind of still here. Feeling very powerless, dejected. :( Just wanted to say hi.

What's going on Red? Why or what has happened to zap your confidence and drive? Tell me who and I will squash them like a bug - and I'm at the right weight to do it too :sumo: :sumo: :sumo: :sumo: :sumo:

Sorry I've been away. It's been a very, very hectic week and will continue to be so for the next few I'm afraid. Upheaving your life requires a lot of time and effort. I am playing the waiting game along with a spin of the "you bet your career" wheel.

At least I got to the store this weekend and we finally have tasty, healthy things to eat instead of trying to make do with what was left in the refrigerator and cabinets.

Just the idea of possibly moving houses has convinced me that I really need to do some things around here, pronto, whether we leave or not. Why is there NEVER enough time?

Anyway... glad to hear you are up and about Chachee and recommitted to your goals. So why do you have to get all your Christmas shopping done by September? Does the USPS stop picking up mail in your part of town when the flakes start to fly? I will gladly take you up on your offer to personal shop, the hardest part is figuring out what to get people.

Raven, hope you are doing ok and feeling better. Since Machine's on the road trip does that mean the ex is FINALLY making good on coming down south? Hope all works out well.

Jolly, congrats on the continuing weight loss. You are doing great, don't lose momentum - keep counting the NSV's are you are racking them up consistently.

Linda, I was the queen of racking up the holiday debt. I would hide the bills come January. Slowly over time we have trimmed back except in a few special cases and we have all agreed to it and that's great. I wish I had time to think about things ahead of time and shop the sales as they hit. I wish you good luck in your mission tho. 100 degrees? We are cool, the leaves are changing already :cry: and it's warming up to the 80's as the week carries on. Sure has been a wierd summer.

One of the wonderful ladies in the office shared her bumper crop of fresh garden tomatoes with me. I am in heaven!!!!!!!! And they are low fat, low salt, low calorie too. Now THAT doesn't happen too often. :LOL:

I will try to be back a little more frequently but it's been crazy and will continue to be so for a bit. So bear with me my spotty appearances. I am still tracking and pulling for you all.

Vent your sorrows Red and here's some good vibes on the rebound... :wizard:

happy, you are the sweetest! It's work and I'm calling it probably the "end of the road" as my father put it (yup, was even on the phone with him to the States). It feels good but I've put my foot down, am handing them an ultimatum back for the one they've given me. I'm as stubborn as mule and this time they've just rubbed me too, too much the wrong way.

I am going to fight back to find my drive, happy. Thanks so much. Your post got me back kicking.

By the way, to help me through what may be a very tough time and to get me back losing fat and exercising I'm reviving a version of the 21-day challenge I used to do here on another forum. I'm starting a 10-day version back up on the support forum. Here's the address if anyone wants to join me. I'm going to be back posting soon here too. Thanks again!

http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=45913

HEy all. Happy, good luck with the job hunt, and hope things get resolved for you soon. I am envious of the tomatoes, though. I have been blowing my budget on fresh ones here. I love them. I really like the summer here though - I hate hot and humid.

Red, I am sending good vibes your way.

Take it easy all. Hope to hear from you soon.

Glad you guys are here, was kind of wondering if there was some dissappearing act plan for a few days.
Boy, lot's happening.
First, Chach, I know what it's like and I last with my mother about two days per visit and then I can't take it any longer, with my mother in law it's about three days, believe it or not we have more in common. All good things must come to an end!
Red, I wish I could do something for you? I am mentally sending you positive vibes right this second and a ton of my empowered strength.........can you feel it all the way to Japan. I'm into visualizion techniques and I shut my eyes and put my hands aside my temples and envisions a very fast RED BALLOOM zapping it's way across the sea and implanting itlself in your head. You are suddenly energized and feeling more positive! Yes, I am weird!
Happy, hope you can get your stuff done, the possiblity of moving always motivates me. We've moved far too many times, yet I am already anxious to get out of here, but for different reasons than in the past.
Jolly, good loss for you, tell me more about how a TOPS meeting works? I'm curious.
As for me, guys, I weighed in this morning and lost one pound. I am now down to 149.2, the first time I have seen the 140s in about five years! Wow! I have three more pounds to go until I reach my 10% goal that ww gave me and 13.2 more to go until I make goal and am back in "good graces" with them and no longer have to pay for meetings! Funny, I am at a half way point now, I have lost 13 pounds and have 13.2 left to make goal! Yet, I look in the mirror and think that maybe 13 more might be too much, am feeling really happy with the results so far.
Red, I want to check out your other thread, but this moment I must go.....
Linda

Heyall. I will need plenty of kicks in the rear this week to stay on course. This last week has been very stressful. I have been falling back on old eating patterns, and am now eating Rolaids as well. It showed up on the scale tonight at TOPS. I had a 3/4 pound gain. I need to stay focused. Decide what I can change, and learn to cope. Without stuffing food in my mouth. I did have a NSV though. I did not stop and get a candy bar on my way home from meeting. And I was wanting one. Decided a sugar free fudgicle would do just as well.

TOPS is a weight loss support group. We don't subscribe to any one eating plan. Just focus on healthy eating habits, exercise, etc. And a lot of moral support. Yearly dues are $20, with anywhere from $1-$4 a month to the local chapter. We do lots of contests too, which makes it fun. The only place where losers are winners.

OH well. Off to supper and bed. I am not feeling well (stress) and if I want to make my workout tomorrow, I need a good night's sleep.

Derry, Jolly, thanks so much for the vibes. I think I most definitely got some of the energy you sent because I am moving again and I feel the fight coming back strong!

You are the greatest! :love:

Sorry I've been so absent! Hopefully things will settle down after today, and I'll have time to actually work out in the mornings now!

Off to the new thread!

Here's the link to the new thread everyone.

http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=45978