YOU: On a Diet - and other Oprah inspired diets - Dr. Phil, Let's Start From The Beginning (again!) Chapter 4 - Key 1 Right Thinking

Link to Chapter 3 Discussion

http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?p=509499#post509499

Let 'er rip! ;)

dip

I have so much to say about this chapter, I could quote nearly every line. So as not to bore you, I will try to make my reply as concise as possible.

I have an Internal Weight Locus of Control. It goes along with being a "child of an alcoholic," co-dependent, feeling responsible for EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE, being a perfectionist...which leads to "all or nothing" thinking, and have a huge fear of failure. I internalize everything, dwell on my mistakes and imperfections, and have a negative internal dialogue.

When I was a kid, I was tall and thin. I was a "girly girl." I was NOT athletic. I had a touch of scoliosis, and my right leg was/is about an inch longer than the left. Because of this I was rather clumsy, tripping on my own feet, and walked with a slight limp. Otherwise, I looked "normal," but it was clear to the other kids and my gym teachers that I wasn't very talented physically. I was the last picked for any team. I was taunted by the neighborhood tomboy. Hide and seek and Tag were daily games that I lost. I NEVER REALLY TRUSTED MY BODY to do what I needed it to do. I would be running the bases and trip making an idiot of myself. Or I would get really injured. I can't count how many times I've sprained an ankle because I landed on it the wrong way or dislocated a kneecap for the same reason. I was known as a klutz. I did take dance lessons and did very well, but the gymnastics that accompanied it seemed impossible. Even back then, if I didn't succeed at something right off the bat, I would quit. It was too embarrassing to fail over and over again. I never learned how to dive even though I was (and still am) a strong swimmer. I tried, and had trouble. I couldn't stand the kids watching me, waiting for me to fail yet again. I couldn't handle another public failure, so I quit trying to learn how to dive. I could ice skate, but roller skating was harder for me. Basically, whatever I did well right away, I continued. Otherwise, I would quit. Luckily, I was smart and got good grades. I was a good actress and singer, so I performed in every school show from grade school right up through high school. Those "drama" and "artsy" kids were more accepting of me and appreciated my sense of humor and talent.

As an adult, I do well with low-impact aerobics, probably because I did well with dancing as a child. But other physical activities intimidate me to this day. I have a really warped vision of my body. I put myself down with negative self talk when I see other women who are athletic. I feel like a failure, so I just avoid all sports activities including being a spectator.

Another problem I have is that I've failed at weight loss attempts so many times that I don't trust myself to stick with it. In the past if I would cheat, I would throw in the towel and binge. That half-day binge would turn into a couple of days, then the weekend (I'll begin again on Monday.)

When I was 12, I began puberty and my body began to "develop." I had full-blown breasts, my period, and some weight gain for the first time in my life. All my friends were petite late-bloomers. My mother and sister were on Weight Watchers at the time. I remember saying that I should go on WW as well. They laughed at me and told me I would never be able to do it. I was so mad that I did the diet (it was a lot harder back then!) and lost the weight. I proved them wrong, but I never forgot how awful I felt when they said that I couldn't do it. As a junior high and high school student, I was very tall, slim, and had a C cup bra. I look back at pictures, and damn, I looked really good. But, all my petite size 3 friends made me feel like an amazon. I thought I was fat. Talk about warped body image. It is amazing to me that I never became anorexic or bullimic.

So now, at 39, 70 lbs. overweight, I look back and can see where all of the negative self talk began. I have a lot of work to do to undo all of it.

I pray you ladies can help me. I really want to be slim again.

Summer

Oh, Summer, thank you for your honest and touching message! I wish I could give you a hug! :grouphug:

I'm an adult child of alcoholics too, so I bet I know a lot of what you feel and tell yourself. Even though I feel like I've "dealt with" most of the crap that goes with being an ACOA I know my internal dialogue is a direct result of being brought up in a chaotic, dysfunctional, alcoholic household.

I have read and re-read this key, and feel really good about the work I've done so far on it, but this is going to be a long journey for me. (For my original post on Key #1, please click here.) (http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?p=463174#post463174)


I pray you ladies can help me. I really want to be slim again.
We are all in this together to help one another--I have no doubt we will get there!

Jo :wave:
------
205.2/197.2/135

The quality of my life is entirely in my hands.

Jo, I will accept that hug and send one right back at ya!

Thanks, Summer

So now, at 39, 70 lbs. overweight, I look back and can see where all of the negative self talk began. I have a lot of work to do to undo all of it.

Summer, that's half the battle right there. Hugs for both of you for "naming it to claim it. And "you cannot change what you do not acknowledge." Doing this in a public forum is hard, I know, but I personally think it's important to put it out there.

Although I have no idea what it possibly can be like to be a ACOA, I did attend Al-Anon last year because a family member's drinking was out of control. There I was, 50 years old thinking I heard and seen just about everything. My problem was miniscule in comparison to some of those folks who themselves were ACOA. The experience changed me, no doubt about it.

The first time I read Key 1, I highlighted in yellow. This time I am highlighting in pink, and again, missed alot. I thought the first time around, I already had this key down, and in a way I did. But going through this again, I'm seeing into myself a little deeper, as well as recognizing things in other people, giving me a broader understanding and empathy. It's also made me take a closer look at the 'excuses' I fed myself for almost 30 years for my obesity.

I hope to have more later, maybe in a few days. This is a chapter that requires much thought and rationalization.

More Hugs,

dip

Summer,
Hello! I'm new here but I just wanted you to know that I woke up exhausted from a night of crying about my weight and comparing myself to my tiny size 4 sister. I was on the vergo of throwing in the towl and found this website and saw your signature and it really made me feel better and made me want to keep on going-- I have copied it down and put it over my computer. Exactly what I needed to read and exactly when I needed to read it. Just wanted to let you know! :) Thanks!
Brandi from Georgia

i am so glad i found this thread. i was a 3fc user a year ago, but so much concentration on my wt problem made me MORE FRANTIC and more obsessed w/ food. i recently came off phentermine, a rx diet drug, and i put all that lost wt on, plus!! i started dr. p's book two weeks ago. what a huge change he has made in my life! i read the book twice, and it is hilited, tabbed w/ file folder labels, and marked with post its. i am near my heaviest, and i no longer have access to rx diet drugs, so i was really overwhelmed by the scale's 179 reading. I am only able to cope because Dr P is so RIGHT ON with his analysis, and then he follows up with action plans that really work. i will post later to specifically address ch 4/key 1....just wanted to say thanx!

I am so glad that I bought this book. If nothing else, it is starting to make me really take a closer look into my own life. After reading this chapter, I am starting to understand just how far back my feelings of negativity go.

My parents both have children from previous marriages, and growing up, my mom's two kids resented me and my fathers two left home when i was young. By the time I hit ten years old I was already feeling like everyone that i loved didnt want to be around me. I always knew that when I hit puberty that I started to gain weight, but now I am understanding why. I turned to food to fill that void. As I went through my teen years, I ended up with a guy that i thought was wonderful, but in reality, he was there putting me down in so many ways, making myself feel worthless.

A friend of mine, now my husband, finally convinced me that this was not a healthy relationship and I ended it. My future husband and I got together shortly after that, but we were only together a short while.

I ended up learning how to be independent for the very first time at age 26. That summer, when my he and I broke up, I was finally able to put my life together again. We got back together and my friend became my husband this past July.

He loves me for me, and tells me all the time that I dont need to lose weight. But I need to do this for me. I need to put the past where it belongs and I need to learn to stop blaming myself for the feelings of others.

My sisters dont know what they are missing by not having me in their life. I think I am a good person, and its about time I did something to make me feel better.

I have promised myself to exercise at least 3 times a week and to change my eating habits. So far, its only been a week, but I have lost 2 lbs, so i am encouraged. I cant wait to see what the rest of the book has in store.

WOW! Isn't Dr. Phil the BEST?!

Dip, thank you.

Brandi, I'm glad I could help. Stick around, Dip is awesome!

Kim, well if I ever wanted to try diet pills, you've convinced me that it would be a huge mistake. I'm glad you have found us and Dr. Phil.

Bedford, isn't it amazing how much one's childhood really affects how we cope with life? I guess all of us who are using food as a drug have a lot of baggage to deal with. Let me tell you, my first time I read Dr. Phil, when I read the chapter on Healing Feelings, I came face to face with some really dark things in my past. I wept for hours. I ended up feeling a lot better. When I read it again, I wonder if I will discover more that needs to be healed. Either way, Dr. Phil has been just what the doctor ordered for me.

Robyn, where are you?!

Summer

Man this book is hitting home with me in sooo many ways!! Even beyond weight loss-- for instance I am now seeing that I have such a tendency to do a lot of "All or Nothing" thinking and I also do a lot of turning small defeats or disappointments into catastrophes. The best advice I have taken from this book regarding weight loss is the idea that I don't have to lose all of this weight Tomorrow, kwim? I always get on a kick and then when I don't see results right away I get disappointed and think it's not working but I feel an odd sense of peace this time. I also so a quote on Oprah.com that really hit the nail on the head: "Get great at the wait-- Perseverance separates the winners from the whiners." Amen to that! That's exactly how I feel-- I just need to stick it out day after day, follow my program and be patient.

I have currently been doing WW on my own and as of my weigh-in day (Sunday) I hadn't lost any weight (but I got on this morning and was down 2lbs!! :)) I am committing to doing at least 30 minutes of exercise everyday (either Tae Bo or a cardio machine at the Y), drinking at least 8 glasses of water daily, taking the slew of vitamins Dr. Phil talks about in his book, and last but not least doing something everyday to work on my appearance that is not weight related. That is really important to me because I get so caught up in thinking that it's all about my weight but I have an overall problem with my appearance, self-image and confidence that I can do things about by taking better care of my self and I don't have to wait until I'm a size 6 or 8 to do so, right?? :) So there it is folks, I've made this promise to myself and put it in a public forum! Thanks for letting me come here and ramble. Glad to be a part of this great group!

Georgia, reading your posting was like looking in a mirror. Wow.

Summer

Georgia/Brandi said, "The best advice I have taken from this book regarding weight loss is the idea that I don't have to lose all of this weight Tomorrow, kwim? I always get on a kick and then when I don't see results right away I get disappointed and think it's not working but I feel an odd sense of peace this time."

Bless your heart! Aren't we all so into the "instant gratification" thing on just about everything we do? Here's an analogy - The one thing as women that we want right away and have no control of is pregnancy and creating a life. When we find out we're pregnant, we want that baby in our arms here and now. But we have to wait 9 months. We have no choice in the matter. We commit to taking care of ourselves and being as healthy as we can for baby's sake, all along thinking and dreaming of little else but that baby.

So how about we all make a commitment to ourselves and each other, for the next 9 months to reshape our lives, our inner-selves, and our bodies? Let's dedicate our thoughts and imaginations to ourselves as a project in the works. Let's take time, even if 5 minutes each day, to clear our minds of everything but imagining what our lives and health can be like 9 months from now. And how we will create that new life by using the 7 keys honestly and diligently.

The reason I say that is because I never would have believed 9 months ago, that applying and enforcing new habits in my life like this would automatically become a way of life. It's true. Everything is so automatic now, that I can't imagine ever going back to the way I was, or thinking the things I did about myself. If you watch Dr. Phil's Show, at this point, the Challengers are saying the same thing too. It takes conscious effort, and at times it's hard, but persistence and patience will get you there, I promise.

For those of you who have children, remember back to your first, how you felt like "you've always been a mother" and how "how did I ever have a life before this baby." Try making yourself "the baby."

Hugs,
dip

That is certainly a new way of looking at it. I am the QUEEN of instant gratification! When I have to work at something over a long term before I get what I want, I always wish I could sleep through it and be woken up when it is over.

I will give your suggestion a try.

Summer

I thought I didn't like the book, but your comments on it are so thought provoking and just downright challenging that I'm going to read it again.
I was thin until puberty also. I never really thought about it before, but my Mom started working and I got braces and zits and a gang of kids were beating me up after school every day and suddenly I'd gained a lot of weight. Also, I had my full height by the time I was twelve and probably just couldn't eat as much anymore. Another factor was that I started having seizures that year (just at night but I'd wake up with my memory wiped and I had to go on an anti-seizure medication, which I still take today. I don't have seizures anymore, but I don't think the meds exactly help with my weight problem). Still I only weighed about 140 through high school (I'm 5'5"). I always wanted to lose 10 pounds, but never stuck with a diet long enough to actually do so. I had ups and downs for years (worked at a dude ranch and got very thin, had several children which fluffed me back up) and my weight always seemed to come back to about 140. Then my third child developed leukemia and suddenly I was 200 pounds. Yikes. (BTW, he is fine now and has been in remission for 14 years but I seem to still be carrying the weight :o ).
I loved the idea of thinking of changing our bodies as one would think of having a pregnancy. To be pregnant with health or hope... very cool thought.
I've often wondered about the connection between having a genetic tendency toward alcoholism and overeating. Both of my Grandfathers were alcoholics. My folks drank very little, nor were they overweight, but my Mom had an anxiety disorder (can't help wondering if her father did too, and that's why he drank?) and my Dad was very obsessive/compulsive.
Anyway, I'm rambling.
Skjolden

Skjolden, I personally have found food to be an addiction, and use it to self-medicate in negative emotional situations. But I didn't realize that I was doing this until I read the book, and actually caught myself doing it. I caught myself because I was aware of it when I hadn't been consciously aware of it previously. Not only have I curbed doing it, but since relieving myself of the negative emotions by practicing Key #2, the negative emotions are few and far between now. I'll describe the experience in more detail when we get to Key 2.

It was ironic that BEFORE the book came out, I was practicing Keys 3-7 just from educating myself about nutrition and behaviors. But it was Keys 1 & 2 that kicked my butt and pulled it all together. I am 51 and I can't believe how good it feels to finally feel like I am in control of myself. And the control doesn't apply just to food, but other negative behaviors I've used for comfort such as shopping. As this journey progresses, I have a growing desire to clean up other behaviors as well as to live life to the fullest.

I believe from experience and observation that addictions do run in families. But some times it's not always apparent which are addicitons, and which are learned behavior. I did a "family tree" diagram starting with my mother's parents down to my nieces, nephews and cousins. Both of my mother's parents were alcoholics (as a kid I had no clue-back in those days it wasn't necessarily socially unacceptable) my mother and her sister were not, but their 3 younger brothers were serious alcoholics before age 20. And the same for their sons, and my aunt's sons, and my brother, and my 4 nephews. The girls in the family weren't effected as badly as the males, but were obese or had an another kind of eating disorder. It was an enlightening and interesting study, however, as Dr. Phil says, it is NOT external forces, such as genetics doing this to us, it is us doing it to ourselves, or ourselves allowing it to happen. See page 61, second paragraph where it starts with "Advice: . . . . ."

Yesterday, I picked up the book to reread the chapter, and stopped dead in my tracks because I noticed something I hadn't previously. The name of the chapter is Key One: Right Thinking - Unlock the Door to Self Control. I hadn't noticed Unlock the Door to Self Control before and I just sat back in my chair and had to think about that for awhile - Self Control. What a concept. My brain guides my hand.

dip

Skjolden, welcome. I'm glad you have come to join us.

My sister is a functioning alcoholic. (We are way beyond doing an intervention.) She has a more serious weight problem than me, but hers started several years before mine did. She had been pencil thin until her first pregnancy when she had to quit smoking. She gained a lot; started WW; got accidentally pregnant again almost immediately; gained more weight; had 2nd baby; got breast cancer; had mastectomy; continued to gain weight; went into remission; went back to WW; and became a lifetime member. There is a lot more, but basically, ever since the birth of her first child she has had a weight problem and a drinking problem.

Now, everyone has crises in their lives. The difference between people is how we deal with those crises. In my family, we anesthetize ourselves with either alcohol, food, or both. Thankfully, alcohol has never been a problem for me. I can take it or leave it. The same with smoking. But food, now that is my addiction of choice.

Dr. Phil has come the closest to being just what I need. He has made me face what I have chosen to deny for many years. I believe with his help and all my friends here, I will succeed to beat my addiction.

Summer

OK, so does anybody want to get more specific to naming and claiming the source for your negative thinking about yourself?

(Hand up) Mine was an emotionally and physically unavailable mother. It began very young. Circumstances were my father died when I was 14 months old, and I had 2 older siblings. My mother was 30, and right after his death, she had some physical ailments, specifically a bad back that caused her much pain. I remember her in bed alot. I was a sickly kid and taking care of me was an obvious PIA to her. I remember feeling early on that I didn't belong to that family. No matter what I did growing up, in school or sports, it never pleased her and she was consistently critical of even my best accomplishments. Because she worked, she was not available to attend school functions. I remember that only one time I got sick in school, like in 7th or 8th grade, and was vomitting. The office called her at work, and said I needed to go home. She couldn't or wouldn't leave work to pick me up so I had to walk home, vomitting along the way, to as always, the empty house. So by this stage of development, and entering puberty, I already had the foundation that I wasn't worth her time.

There were other specific instances that I may have relayed before, but you get the picture. I stayed chubby throughout grammar school, finding much comfort in food. I had 25 cents a day allowance that bought my favorite after school treat - a 16 oz Pepsi and Twinkies. In eighth grade, I discovered boys, so the summer between 8th grade and high school, I lost 50# by starving myself. But that was after mommy dearest had put me on every diet Rx available at the time, which turned me into a nervous wreck and emotional cripple. So throughout my teens I had an eating disorder, and rebelled making too many bad decisions and choices. I was the poster teen for addicitons, jumping from one to another trying to fill the empty hole in my heart and lack of self-worth and self-esteem. All through my childhood and teens, I had no supervision, no discipline other than "don't do anything that will embarrass me." If my own mother didn't care enough about me, why should I or anybody else, for that matter?

Things change, we learn as we grow, but I carried the anger of a rejected child with me. As an adult, I never handled criticism or rejection well, both of which put me on the defensive, making me feel I had to fight for my right to exist. I validated myself in many ways, but still held deep alot of anger.

So that was my source of unright thinking. How I changed it has much to do with the next Chapter and Key 2.

dip

Wow Dip. It is easy to see how you ended up with addictions. In this day and age, your childhood would have led to a DCF referral. It is called neglect. Parents aren't allowed to do that these days without a teacher or a doctor reporting them. I'm so sorry that you felt so unwanted. I had a friend who when she was 14, her parents divorced. Her father took off with a 19 year old leaving her mother emotionally paralyzed. My friend became anorexic, ending up in Yale New Haven Hospital strapped to the bed. She kept pulling out her I.V.'s because she just wanted to die or at the very least be noticed. Because her mother was still a basket case, she moved in with her childless and very nurturing aunt. She lived with her throughout the remainder of her teens until she graduated college and became my roommate at age 22. She has reconciled with both of her parents, has since married and had three children. Yes, psychologically things with her can be shaky. But, she is at a normal weight, and a happy successful adult.

You and my friend are examples of people who can overcome neglectful parents. Good for you!

I have nothing to contribute about myself since I poured out my soul at the beginning of this thread. I will save some for chapter 5.

Anytime you want to get us started, go right ahead.

Have a great weekend everyone!

Summer

Wow, Summer. Ya know, there were many things back in those days that were alot different. We were never considered neglected because we were well provided for. I went to private schools, was obviously well-fed, had beautiful clothes. We weren't the most well-off family on the block, but we had just about everything other kids had except a stay-at-home attentive and emotionally available mother. In the evenings she was too tired, and the weekends she did clean, relax and date. My older brother and sister, 8 and 9 years, were suppose to watch me after school, but were teenagers and abusive when I would tattle on them. I also carried that anger.

After what you said, thinking back, my teachers did like me alot, but I thought it was because I was an A student, well-behaved, and living in an adult household, I had a vocabulary beyond my years. I read alot too but that was for escape. Mommy dearest went to the required parent-teacher conferences, and being the intelligent and sophisticated type she was, no one ever suspected, I guess. I have no memories of any hugging, compliments, encouragement or nurturing. Knowing what I know now about such things, I can say that I was a hair close to not have bonded with her. I must have bonded some way, some how because I'm not a sociopath. As an adult, I was always envious of friends who had close relationships with their mothers. I felt cheated in that department.

Not long before she died a few years ago, I did approach her about it all. Having my own child, I guess I wondered for many years how she could have been that way to me. In fact, she was more loving and affectionate with my son and favored him over the other grandchildren. When I talked to her about it, I was calm and actually acted like I didn't care what her answer was going to be. But I never expected the answer I got. She said to me, "You were such a strange child, I didn't know how to relate to you." I asked her why she thought I was a strange child? She said because I was so different from my brother and sister. My brother and sister had the benefit, for awhile anyway, of 2 parents and a normal family life. My luck of the draw was that I was born just befor my father got sick, and my mother shut down. What's ironic is that to this day, my brother and sister have pretty screwed up lives, while even though I have fought addicitions, I am functional and have a pretty good thing going in *real* life. Keys 1 and 2 were just what I needed to pull it all together, give it an identity, and get over it. The only regret I have is that it took this long, and I wish I knew this 20 years ago.

OK, onward and upward to Key 2.

dip

My goodness this thread hits home!

I'm the adult child of an alcoholic father. He died 12 years ago. My mother is the queen of co-dependents. I was born 10 months after they married and she told me he had told her not to worry about getting pregnant, he knew what to do. He was 29 and she was 17 when they married. Well, he was using the "withdrawal" method and I out ran him one night. She told me a few years ago that when she found out she was pregnant with me, she made the decision that she would have her next child when SHE wanted to. If I needed anything to confirm I was an inconvenience, this was it! I remember going out to play after my brother was born and being sexually molested regularly by a teenager in the neighborhood. I don't specifially remember being sent outside so I wouldn't disturb baby brother, but I suspect I was. We are 5 years apart in age. He has always been and is to this day her fair haired child. He can do no wrong. Thankfully, this doesn't affect my relationship with him. He and I are very close. He has no control over her behavior any more than I do. I've just this week come to realize how angry I am with her for the past. Unfortunately, this is not an issue that I can discuss with her. She would never be able to handle it emotionally so I have to find some other way to deal with the anger. Actually, maybe it's that I don't think I could handle her reaction. She is also the queen of tears and guilt and I simply don't want to have to deal with them. She has lost the vision in her left eye and most of it in her right eye. She went through **** being married to my dad so I really don't want to lay this at her doorstep.

I was always about 20 lbs overweight in school until I turned 16. I lost the 20 lbs and got lots and lots of attention from the boys. It's a wonder I was still a virgin when I married. I've started reading the book again and it's really hitting home with me this time.

Dip, books were my salvation. I read all of the time. I enjoyed reading but I also enjoyed the escape the books gave me from my life.

This is such a good thread and you are all so open with your sharing. I'm glad I'm here.

Marilyn

Dip, I've been thinking about what your wrote about having a baby.

"Here's an analogy - The one thing as women that we want right away and have no control of is pregnancy and creating a life. When we find out we're pregnant, we want that baby in our arms here and now. But we have to wait 9 months. We have no choice in the matter. We commit to taking care of ourselves and being as healthy as we can for baby's sake, all along thinking and dreaming of little else but that baby."

My imagination has been running wild with this. Okay, so we look at the next nine months' commitment. If we were really pregnant, we would take our vitamins, exercise, eat right. In a few months we would need new clothes (maternity if pregnant but smaller ones this time around). At the end of the nine months we would have "given birth" to a new person - US! This would happen around Thanksgiving time, the perfect time to be thankful for the blessing of a new, healthier body. I like the idea of doing this. When do we start?

Marilyn

Marilyn,

:love: Immediately :love:

The first thing I would do (and it won't hurt me to do this again myself) is create the no-fail environment, which happens to be the next key we'll be working on anyway. I suggest the Dr. Phil Food Guide - clean out your frig and cabinets, and then use the food guide to go grocery shopping. Or whichever plan you are going to follow. Prepare as much food in advance as possible so it's there and you're not tempted to eat otherwise. Begin creating new habits immediately so the new habits become real habits sooner.

I'm often asked "what diet are you on?" which drives me up a wall because I am not on a diet - I've changed my lifestyle and have relearned how to eat. You just gave me a comeback for those who might ask. I'll just say, "I'm creating a new little person." Won't that make people wonder! LOL.

Nine months, 36 weeks is really not that long, and what would it be like to approach the holidays not stressing about how much weight we're going to gain, or what we're going to eat or not eat. Because I started about this time last year, and by the holidays had already formed my new good habits, I lost 12# between Thanksgiving and New Year's, and no stressing about it. I think this is the best time to start because the promise of Spring, of everything being reborn and new life is just around the corner.

I loved your clothes analogy! I didn't think of that.

dip

Dip,

I started my 36 weeks Saturday. I thought Valentine's Day was a good day to start loving myself. I've lost 6 lbs since then. I know it's water weight, but it sure is encouraging. When I look in my closet, I'm so tired of the same clothes I've worn for about the last 6 years. I can't wait for the new ones!

My apartment is pretty much no-fail now. A couple of weeks ago, I went on a binge and ate everything I could get my hands on so I pretty well cleared out the things I don't need to have available. I gave up french fries and cokes on 2/10 and after one week, I'm still doing without them! These are two of my favorites and it will make a difference not having them. I actually walked Friday and I'm planning to do WATP when I get home this afternoon.

I love what you shared about being in the health groove before the holidays hit last year. Surely between now and then, I can make this a way of life.

Thank you so much for your encouraging posts. They are really helpful to me. You are a very wise person.

See you lighter!
Marilyn

293/287/260 (by May 16) BW/CW/First goal weight

Marilyn, I am so happy for you! "By george, I think she's got it! " A line from My Fair Lady, another transformation story. I haven't a clue what you look like, but from your enthusiasm and "right thinking," I have no doubt that by your 'due date,' you will be a wisp of what you are today.

My dear, I am not wise, but I just want to share and pass on how wonderful life can be when we just re-arrange, develop new healthy habits, and surround ourselves with support. We all can be My Fair Ladies by taking the time for ourselves, the focus on our goals and persist with Dr. Phil's 7 Keys.

See *YOU* lighter, indeed!

dip

Good morning, Dip!

I only made it through the warm-up in my WATP tape yesterday but at least I was moving for a little while. My knees give me problems. I brought my walking shoes to work today and plan to walk here before I go home. The floor my office is on has a hallway all around the perimeter of the floor and 8 trips around equals a mile. It's a perfect situation for walking.

I'm very pleased with myself right now. Not only have I given up FF and cokes, but I've cut way back on my nighttime eating. I'm also journaling. Not a lot, just a few words each day, but enough to look back on and see what I'm accomplishing. Finally, after 55 years, I'm doing it. This change is also making me feel better about myself. One of these days I hope to be an inspiration to someone like you are to me.

Have a wonderful day!

Marilyn

Hi Everyone,

I wonder if this book will help with compulsive overeating? I sometimes eat things I don't want to and don't resist at all.

I don't even know if it is compulsive overeating, but I think it is.

Tracy

Hi - I know I am late joining but am reading the book and really trying to change my life. I am 50 years old, had my first bout of overweight in college - quickly lost it, but gained it again at 35 when I was trying to raise 3 kids alone, go to school and work - I had every excuse in the book. I hit my top weight when my dh died in 1998. I since remarried, but the pounds still stay - I dislike the way I look, feel, etc but this chapter really opened my eyes. I have 5kids - but only 1 overweight. She is 28 and 250 - she really wanted to exercise so I began again for her and now we are trying to help each.

It was her decision that we read the book and then for this chapter call each other with our positive reinforcing statement each day - Hoping it helps.

Welcome, Deenie!

Hopefully your daughter can join us too. We have a wonderful and very supportive group here, and I have no doubt that together we can master the 7 keys.

Jump right in with your thoughts on the chapters you have read. We are here for you!

Jo :wave:
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I am mindful that progress, not perfection, is my goal each day.