Hi everyone, I am not new to this site, I have been here before looking for inspiration silently. I was at my highest of 260lbs + and I managed to lose some of it by going through the inspiring posts here on 3fc.
I weigh 212 lbs today and to be honest, I had gone down to the 190s 8 months ago. I got married in December 2014 and gained the pounds back into 2 teens.
My in laws are both doctors (my mil is a gynecologist and fil is a pediatrician) and they think I shouldn't gain anymore weight 'cause well they want grandchildren and they don't want me to have health issues. My husband agrees. I can bring out my ego and say it's none of their business they should just accept me for who I am but the truth is they have seen the worst of it all being doctors and I don't even want to go down that road where I put up a ego fight. Professionally, they are right!
I just feel like I am disappointing everyone around me and how much ever I want to be happy with myself, I am not. I end up sulking a lot and giving dh a lot of unnecessary drama. It just needs to stop!
I need to regain all the motivation I lost from being too happy to be married and get back into that beast mode where I did more for myself than I did for anyone else. (don't mean to sound selfish) Don't get me wrong, I go to the gym with my husband every evening and he motivates me like no one else. He is a fit, healthy, muscular man who weighs 152 lbs! He is my own personal trainer at the gym and helps me lift weights and stuff. (So imagine my embarrassment at the gym.. I'm this fat chubby thing huffing and puffing while working out with a buff man) He isn't embarrassed to be with me clearly, it's just all in my head.
I just feel sometimes, he doesn't get the emotional drama that comes with body/image issues. He never had them. I on the other hand have plenty and have had them for a long time, like since middle school. I would love to talk to him about my issues but it just feels more comforting to talk to people who are on the same page, like on this forum. Am I wrong?
So anyway, enough of talk. I am back here again, hoping to get back into the groove and finally see GOAL on the scale! Help me guys!!