Depression and Weight Issues - Anyone deal with occassional, unexplainable short episodes of crippling depression?




GlamourGirl827
07-02-2014, 03:45 PM
I am wondering if anyone else suffers from this.

Most of the time, I'm fine. "Normal" feeling. Energetic, happy...I get upset if there's a reason, but nothing out of the ordinary.

But about 2-3 times a year, maybe a bit more I get sudden depression. It just comes out of no where and I feel like I'm buried under 10 feet of darkness. Its awful. I cant figure out what causes it or how to make it stop.

At the shortest, it might last a week. I had a very bad episode that lasted about 6-7 months several years ago.

The worst thing is when I get into these funks, I eat eat eat eat to the point of sickness over eating, an I put on weight so fast, like crazy fast, because of how much I eat daily. I also stop exercising. Stop wanting to go out, stop doing anything that I should be doing (like go all day and don't do the dishes, simple chores.) I skip taking the kids to functions, and stop showering and getting dressed. I have no desire to do anything, I just sit on the computer all day, reading message boards and watching junk tv. I am mostly blah, but I'm irritable if I'm not left alone, just generally grumpy. I have like a zero tolerance for stress and simple decision making. I'm tired, and can barely get out of bed, I'm so tired, drowsy during the day. This is especially hard because when I'm not depressed I get up at 5am to run. So I've been peeling myself out of bed around 7a for the kids. I also have no desire to run anyway. But I really miss my mornings. :( I've been setting my alarm and I'm literally sleeping through it! Like I don't even remember it going off! I'm beyond tired.

I'm sure that the staying in, very poor nutrition and lack of exercise only magnify this, but I have taken noticed that those things don't precede the depression, that the depression comes first.

I am terrified of these episodes. Big part because of weight, this is always when I regain my weight, its awful. I don't know how long it will last. Its just like one day I wake up and feel like myself again.

Anyway it started Friday, I felt it and I was just trying to ignore it. But here it is.

What the **** is going on??? :?:

I edited it to say, I'm not sad. Its weird. I really like my life. I'm "happy" and grateful. I know I'm happy but its like there's this wall keeping me from feeling it.


tubolard
07-02-2014, 07:23 PM
I think I can empathize with what you feel. I do that but I seem to cycle more rapidly with more depressive episodes then happy ones. I feel the wall as well. It just feels like there is something in the way, I can;t seem to move past it when it happens to me.
I also eat to the point of being sick just to try to force down the feelings I think. I don't really have any advice just wanted to let you know you are not alone.

Seana
07-02-2014, 09:23 PM
Yes. Although fortunately for me they don't last as long. I have no advice. But I, too, can empathize.


hannahbeanies
07-03-2014, 06:08 AM
I have been there with you. Mine has a name- I got diagnosed many moons ago with major depressive disorder. It basically is a type of depression that isn't a one time thing- it goes in cycles. I can very much empathize with you. It is like, I am two different people. My personality is almost completely different when I am in a downswing. I wish there was something I could recommend that would make it all better, but unfortunately the only thing that has worked for me is medication, but I know for a lot of people that isn't an option or they understandably don't want to put that stuff in their bodies.

I know that it is life crippling and I am so very sorry you go through it. Know that you are definitely not alone. :hug:

NaughtyNibbler
07-03-2014, 11:20 AM
For me, keeping busy with something and getting exercise will help me get out of the depression. I'm a big believer in, "acting as if, and the feelings will follow". I may not want to plant some flowers, go for a walk or organize something at home. I may have a hard time getting started, but if I do get started, I generally get a benefit.

I take a very low dose of Celexa for Seasonal Depression. I generally take a break from it during the Spring and early Summer.

I can relate to out of control eating. It can be a slippery slope, One day you are in control and on a good path, and then on a stressful day you indulge in the foods you want to stay away from. It is so easy to slide back into mindless eating. It can feel like someone threw a switch and the control you had the day before is gone.

For me, it becomes a challenge to re-establish the good habit again. What worked for me recently, was posting daily on a thread and getting support. After approx. a week, I got my control back and I was glad I made the effort.

Naughty

GlamourGirl827
07-03-2014, 11:44 AM
Thank you all. Today I feel a bit better. I am trying to be kind to myself rather than the usual dialog of "whats wrong with you? snap out of it! Stop being such a miserable blob!" I feel like the cloud is lifting so I'm hoping in a few days I feel like me again.

I have been there done that with meds and its not for me. I don't believe I need them. For me, I don't like to run and get meds for ever bump in the rode, and a few days of depression is only a bump for me. If something like this persisted for a month or more I might reconsider meds. Its not like I'm suicidal. I just feel blahhhhhh. I can logically tell myself that this will pass and I try to ride it out without to much weight gain. That seems to be my main focus, that I'm gaining. I think that makes me feel worse so its a cycle.

NaughtyNibbler
07-03-2014, 12:15 PM
Glad the cloud is starting to lift! Sunshine is around the corner!

raining 74
07-03-2014, 04:37 PM
No advice, just know you aren't alone. I feel for you. (((HUGS)))

hannahbeanies
07-03-2014, 04:47 PM
I am glad you are feeling better! Being kind to yourself is very important. And I completely understand that medication is not for you. Perhaps you could do some physical activity that stimulates serotonin. Exercise is key for me. Writing and journaling helps me a lot when I get into a downswing.