Chicks in Control - Staying out of grocery stores?




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ubergirl
06-18-2014, 03:38 PM
I have a question for you all.

I made an observation today that really surprised me. I noticed that it REALLY helps me a lot to stay out of the grocery store.

One of the big danger zones for me is when I have to "run to the store to pick something up." At the store, this is when I buy stuff like bags of candy, a box of cookies, etc. Also, if I go to the drug store to pick up a prescription, get some beauty product, etc. that's also an automatic invitation for me to troll the candy aisle.

So, about a month ago, I got really busy working on a project (I work from home) and I pretty much stopped going to the store while other family members picked it up for me. I still do all the cooking. Also, my daughter got her driver license and she's been running to the drugstore to pick up her RXs etc. so I haven't had to do it.

So, I haven't binged a single time, and I really haven't been tempted.

Then, yesterday, I ran to the store to pick up milk and I went into the bakery section to get something for my little one. It didn't trigger a binge, but it did make me remember how many times I was in the bakery section looking for something to binge on.

That's when I realized that maybe food stores aren't the place for me. I wouldn't ask an alcoholic to run to the store to pick up a case of beer for me, so maybe I should plan to avoid food shopping in stores. Because of where I live, I can actually order groceries from Amazon and I've done it on occasion when I'm busy.

Wondering how everyone else feels about that. As a mom, it never really occurred to me that I should delegate grocery shopping to someone else or have my groceries delivered, but now I'm thinking it might be better for me.

Does anyone else have any thoughts about this or experiences to share?


IanG
06-18-2014, 03:51 PM
I think you are on to a good strategy. I buy a lot of my food online and it gives me little room to slip up. My only problem doing that is that I hoard a lot of the non-perishable food I do eat e.g. canned fish, honey, canned hummus. If I see something going for an unusually low price I stock up on the stuff which is both expensive and a little weird (having lots of food around the place). I am trying to be more disciplined now to eat down some of my stocks which should help save some money.

Desiderata
06-18-2014, 04:01 PM
Great insight, kudos for observing it! Outsourcing your grocery shopping (to family, or to a delivery service) might be a great experiment to try. Does "if it's not on the list, it doesn't get purchased" work for you at all? Either way, I'd say give deliberate outsourcing a trial and see how it goes for you.


lucindaarrowspark
06-18-2014, 04:04 PM
OMG!!! Yes I feel twangs of guilt for not PURCHASING whole wheat breads! Even though whole wheat bread is the instigator of all my binge eating episodes.
I have to pass the whole wheat bread aisle and forgive myself for not buying the delicious nutritious bread. I am a food addict and carbohydrates are my drug of choice.

ChubbyMum
06-18-2014, 10:50 PM
I avoid the grocery shop as much as possible because it's a real strain on my willpower. I do our weekly shopping online and have it delivered and anything extra I go quickly (quite often I chew sugar free gum in there) and if I feel weak I buy a diet soda as a 'treat'.

maddierep
06-19-2014, 04:54 AM
exactly. Weirdly i love grocery stores. In fact even when travelling, i sometimes like hanging out in swanky grocery places (i must confess i love whole foods, but then i really like safeway and asda as well)

So this love that dare not be named also means putting me in the path of temptation (the sainsbury's soft baked chocolate chip cookies are pure evil), even what would otherwise be a health option (i'm looking at you bread - amirite Lucinda?) becomes a trigger.

So i avoid the stores as much as possible, and it's helped manage the binging

Michou
06-19-2014, 06:48 AM
avoiding a trigger works to a certain extend, but comes a time where you need to face reality and build a strategy to not be influence by the trigger.

I personnaly love sitting in a restaurant, definite trigger for eating what makes me gain weight, I could avoid these social events and isolate myself but I could also learn to resist and make better choice and keep my social life.

Grocery shopping is the same you have as many good opportunities to make good choices than bad ones. I have learned to read labels before I put it in the basket, funny how reading that 30 gr is 400 calories change my mind frame. I view those calories as wasted exercise time and all that muscle pain, sweat and being pooped should not go down the drain for a croissant that will give me pleasure for a minute. One hour of exercise than gives me a better health vs a minute if buttery taste in my mouth. So I go to the fruit section and grab a ripe luscious juicy peach that I will enjoy guilt free.

I do not beleive that avoiding situation is the long term solution because let s face it we need food to survive we either grow it or buy it.

Mrs Snark
06-19-2014, 08:13 AM
I have learned to shop after my biggest meal of the day. Shopping hungry is a bad, bad thing, because at that point I swear I can rationalize any purchase.

Wannabeskinny
06-19-2014, 08:46 AM
I've done the exact same thing but for very different reasons! I used to shop every single day at the grocery store. I had read a book once called "French Women Don't Get Fat" and had adopted the attitude of walking to the market every day to buy fresh food. It was something I enjoyed doing for a long long time. It kept me active, walking, and that meant I didn't have too much food lying around in the house spoiling. The system worked really really well for many years. (Also, I made sure not to go to the store on an empty stomach, that's the only reason I'd buy binge food.)

But then a few months ago I started Intuitive Eating which allowed me to eat as much as I wanted whenever I wanted etc. So I ate all the foods I hadn't allowed myself to eat while I was dieting. Once I got that out of my system I stopped obsessing food altogether. Now food does not play a prominent role in my life anymore and quite frankly I've gotten so bored and tired of shopping at the market every single day. Every morning I've got to cook breakfast for me, feed my toddler, go to the grocery store, cook lunch, cook dinner, feed my toddler again, get his snacks ready. OMG my life is nothing but cooking and washing dishes and going grocery shopping and because food is no longer the center of my pleasure this has gotten very tedious.

So I've cut back way back on food shopping. I only shop every few days now, and send my husband out to do a lot of the shopping so that I don't have to. He's taken on some cooking assignements as well and I eat a lot less food and cook a lot less. Anyway, I felt the need to eliminate some food activities such as cooking and shopping - I can't believe how much my life revolved around food before. I'm bored to death even remembering it.

Wannabehealthy
06-19-2014, 09:44 AM
I agree with Micheu, who said you should build up a strategy to not be influenced by the trigger. It's not easy, but it's worth it in the long run. Teach yourself that you CAN be in the bakery aisle without buying anything.

Also, maybe you shouldn't be buying that treat for your little ones. Start them on eating fruit for a treat. They should not grow up thinking that a treat has to be something sweet.

ubergirl
06-19-2014, 12:25 PM
avoiding a trigger works to a certain extend, but comes a time where you need to face reality and build a strategy to not be influence by the trigger.

I personnaly love sitting in a restaurant, definite trigger for eating what makes me gain weight, I could avoid these social events and isolate myself but I could also learn to resist and make better choice and keep my social life.

Grocery shopping is the same you have as many good opportunities to make good choices than bad ones. I have learned to read labels before I put it in the basket, funny how reading that 30 gr is 400 calories change my mind frame. I view those calories as wasted exercise time and all that muscle pain, sweat and being pooped should not go down the drain for a croissant that will give me pleasure for a minute. One hour of exercise than gives me a better health vs a minute if buttery taste in my mouth. So I go to the fruit section and grab a ripe luscious juicy peach that I will enjoy guilt free.

I do not beleive that avoiding situation is the long term solution because let s face it we need food to survive we either grow it or buy it.
____

I hear you, and while that is a good idea in theory, my reality seems somewhat different.

I have no trouble going to restaurants, and that is not a binge trigger for me. I never eat fast food because I think it's gross, so I don't have a problem with that.

I don't buy junk every time I go into the store. Most of the time, I just walk right past the stuff that I shouldn't be eating. In fact, I managed not to binge a single time for more than 2 years, between from 2009 to 2012.

I know what's healthy and what's not. I love fresh fruit and veggies. I love broiled fish. In fact, no one else in my family has a weight problem and I do all of the cooking. I buy and prepare healthy nutritious food for my family and myself-- but then I go and binge in secret on crap that I don't need. Often that food gets stashed in my purse or eaten in the car on the way home.

In fact, to take it a step further, I can keep binge food in the house if I know it's for the kids or for some special event and not touch it. But if I'm alone in the car and pop into the store when no one else is with me-- that seems to be a trigger.

Also, maybe you shouldn't be buying that treat for your little ones. Start them on eating fruit for a treat. They should not grow up thinking that a treat has to be something sweet.

In fact, he wanted a plain bagel. No reason to assume that I've taught my kids that a treat means something sweet. Also, My mom restricted my food and constantly monitored what I ate, which is a known risk factor for developing eating disorders. I've always fed my children healthy food and not placed any kinds of restrictions on their eating and they are all normal weight and healthy and I'm happy to say that none of them, including my two teen girls, have weight or body image issues.

In short, I know everything there is to know about how to make healthy food choices. What I struggle with is what to do when the voice of reason flies out the window and I find myself elbow deep in a bag of candy.

Wannabeskinny
06-19-2014, 01:18 PM
I hear you, and while that is a good idea in theory, my reality seems somewhat different.

I have no trouble going to restaurants, and that is not a binge trigger for me. I never eat fast food because I think it's gross, so I don't have a problem with that.

I don't buy junk every time I go into the store. Most of the time, I just walk right past the stuff that I shouldn't be eating. In fact, I managed not to binge a single time for more than 2 years, between from 2009 to 2012.

I know what's healthy and what's not. I love fresh fruit and veggies. I love broiled fish. In fact, no one else in my family has a weight problem and I do all of the cooking. I buy and prepare healthy nutritious food for my family and myself-- but then I go and binge in secret on crap that I don't need. Often that food gets stashed in my purse or eaten in the car on the way home.

In fact, to take it a step further, I can keep binge food in the house if I know it's for the kids or for some special event and not touch it. But if I'm alone in the car and pop into the store when no one else is with me-- that seems to be a trigger.



In fact, he wanted a plain bagel. No reason to assume that I've taught my kids that a treat means something sweet. Also, My mom restricted my food and constantly monitored what I ate, which is a known risk factor for developing eating disorders. I've always fed my children healthy food and not placed any kinds of restrictions on their eating and they are all normal weight and healthy and I'm happy to say that none of them, including my two teen girls, have weight or body image issues.

In short, I know everything there is to know about how to make healthy food choices. What I struggle with is what to do when the voice of reason flies out the window and I find myself elbow deep in a bag of candy.

Another known cause of eatin disorders is your dieting and restricting. Secret binges and "knowing exactly how to eat nutritiously but bein unable to stick to it" are classic symptoms of an ED. The lure of forbidden food is uncontrollable. It controlled me for decades. You seem to understand this when it comes to your children and don't want to set them up for disordered eating but you're not applying the principle to yourself. I do IE and one of the initial steps is to legalize all food (as much as you want whenever you want it, for as long as tr phase lasts). It sounds very counterintuitive but going through it resulted in me becoming a very calm eater that has no need to do secret stashes and off the grid binges anymore. It's extreme but IMO the only way I could've cured my ED.

Arctic Mama
06-19-2014, 01:36 PM
Limiting exposure does help, though Michou nailed it that you can't rely only on avoidance. But it's smart to avoid triggering yourself if you know it's an issue.

My husband does the shopping - mostly because he passes the stores on the way home and me going means taking the more expensive to fuel vehicle and all the children. But I admit it's a relief to just give him a list and not worry more about it!

Gingerjv
06-19-2014, 01:51 PM
Going to the store is really a disaster for me) The biggest problem for me are sales! "buy 2 bottles of milk and get 1 free". And i buy these 3 bottles!!! But the problem is i was not going to buy milk at all!! It was not in my shopping list! But thanks to all that "sales" I buy those things i do not need(( And what then?? Then i need to eat/drink all of the food i bought! Terrible(( And the second problem is going to shop hungry;-) I already have made a promise do not go to the store when i am HUNGRY)) never ever go shopping hungry)) you will for sure buy lots of crapp!! Shopping online is a great idea actually. It saves time, money and protect you from buying the crapp;-)

ubergirl
06-19-2014, 02:09 PM
Well, in any case, maybe it's not staying out of the store that's helping, but maybe I'm staying out of the store because I'm not in a mindset that has been making me want to binge.

But I do hate food shopping and I'm quite delighted when I order my groceries and they show up on my doorstep, so for now I'm going to stick with it. I'll keep you posted.