100 lb. Club - How do you know that THIS IS IT - the final time?




Frances123
06-14-2014, 08:58 AM
I've had major eating issues since childhood. I've lost - and regained - the same 100 pounds three times in my life. Last January 2013, I decided that enough was enough. I was starting to have more ramifications from my weight (heartburn, plantar fasciitis, etc.), and I was just miserable. So...

1) I went to therapy to deal with the reasons why I kept overeating.
2) I started working out regularly and increased the difficulty of my workouts as I lost.
3) I very slowly (this is still a work in progress) improved my nutrition by going from all sugar/carbs to vegetables, fruits, and very little sugar/carbs.
4) As I went down in size, I got rid of every single item of clothing that was too big.

I'm down almost 75 pounds now, with 25 - 35 to go. I *feel* like THIS IS IT and that I'm going to keep going, hit goal, and maintain successfully forever. I try not to think about the statistics of regain, and my own past history. I feel like I've done everything I can to set myself up for success. I try to ignore my fear about regain and just focus on the positive. I still have a tiny bit of doubt, though.

Just wondering...how do you know that THIS IS IT for you, the final time you're losing weight? A certain incentive or feeling? Health reasons that won't let you slide back? Etc., etc. Those of you who've lost and maintained, how did you know?


Michou
06-14-2014, 09:10 AM
I dont know if it is it, but this make me realise that I must stay focus.

I had lost a lot of weight and regained half of it, I had this feeling that it was it and I relaxed a little at first and then I said a little more, then it is only 1 pound, then 2, then 30.

So is it now having lost back 20 with 10 more to go, I hope, but what I jnderstood is that in order to maintain I will have to keep doing what I am doing now and not fool myself in thinking that it is only 1 pound.

The biggest incentive is the energy I have now compared to 2 months ago and also looking in the mirror and seejng a younger version of myself.

Skinnygirldreams
06-14-2014, 09:18 AM
It sounds like you are DOIN' IT! Way to go. I haven't lost/maintained yet, but it really sounds like you are setting yourself up for success. I think that for me when all my weight finally comes off, I'm going to be able to keep it off because I'll have a routine. I plan on sticking to that routine even once I hit maintinence and that will keep me going. Good luck to you in the final stretch!!


Gingerjv
06-14-2014, 10:13 AM
Hello! Good luck to you! I still in the progress of losing weight, but i think when time comes you will know when to stop! It is something your organism will show you

Paulitens
06-14-2014, 11:05 AM
I struggled with my weight my whole life but I never managed to lose weight; I would quit my diets after a few days because I just didn't have the will power or the focus to continue. I honestly have no idea what changed in me this time, where all this self control and outlook on making this a lifestyle (so it can be sustainable... otherwise if I think of it as a diet I'll bounce back when I meet my goal and stop "dieting") are coming from. This is a new "me" I have never seen before, and I like it. It took 33 darn years. LOL

ubergirl
06-14-2014, 12:22 PM
I've had major eating issues since childhood. I've lost - and regained - the same 100 pounds three times in my life. Last January 2013, I decided that enough was enough. I was starting to have more ramifications from my weight (heartburn, plantar fasciitis, etc.), and I was just miserable. So...

1) I went to therapy to deal with the reasons why I kept overeating.
2) I started working out regularly and increased the difficulty of my workouts as I lost.
3) I very slowly (this is still a work in progress) improved my nutrition by going from all sugar/carbs to vegetables, fruits, and very little sugar/carbs.
4) As I went down in size, I got rid of every single item of clothing that was too big.

I'm down almost 75 pounds now, with 25 - 35 to go. I *feel* like THIS IS IT and that I'm going to keep going, hit goal, and maintain successfully forever. I try not to think about the statistics of regain, and my own past history. I feel like I've done everything I can to set myself up for success. I try to ignore my fear about regain and just focus on the positive. I still have a tiny bit of doubt, though.

Just wondering...how do you know that THIS IS IT for you, the final time you're losing weight? A certain incentive or feeling? Health reasons that won't let you slide back? Etc., etc. Those of you who've lost and maintained, how did you know?

I'm so glad you posted this today as I woke up feeling worried and asking myself the EXACT same question.

In 2009, I had a big click because I had a super huge motivator in my life, and also because I found 3FC where the support really helped. I lost 110 lbs.

So, now, I'm plagued with doubt. How do I know it will work this time? (I'm three weeks in so far.) Is is worth it?

I know that last time, it never occurred to me that I would gain back the weight until I actually did. I was so much happier in my new lifestyle. I had dropped from a 24-16 to a 12-14 and I was also really fit-- running 4 miles on the treadmill 4 or 5 days a week. It was great! I loved it. And it didn't seem that hard. I really felt as if I had gotten the hang of it. It was the most important thing in my life.

So why the regain?

The short answer is that my maintenance happened to coincide with one of the most stressful periods in my life for a variety of reasons. Also, I moved two months into maintenance, meaning that I lost every single support that had gotten me through the 110 lb loss.

But, I am still asking myself the same question: do I need to do something fundamentally different this time? If so, what is it.

Did you find therapy helpful?

I've also been considering putting myself into a medically supervised weight loss program.

For me, I think the single most crucial factor is support. When I started to struggle I was living in a new city where I no longer had my IRL support group, and I found that when I was really struggling, my online support at 3FC just wasn't enough.

FeraFilia
06-14-2014, 02:07 PM
I think this is it for me because if I don't do this now, if I don't lose another 70-80 pounds (at the very least).. My husband and I will start losing our chance to have kids. I'll be 31 in a few months. We don't have any children yet. I know getting pregnant at 300 pounds is possible, but I know it's very unhealthy and difficult. If I don't make this happen, I disappoint *so* many people, including myself. Failure just isn't really an option this time.

kaplods
06-14-2014, 03:47 PM
There are no guarantees. It's only the "last time" if I refuse to follow the habits and rationalizations I used in the past.

I'm losing slower than I ever have in the past (partially due to aging metabolism, but mostly due to lack of motivation).

But even with lack of motivation (and the resulting frequent bad choices), I haven't had the uncontrolled backsliding that always led me to regain all the weight (plus some) before "starting over."

I don't fear regain anymore - not because it couldn't happen again, but because I know I can control WHETHER it happens again.

1. Refusing to catastrophize stalls and gains. Choosing to make peace with the scale, regardless of the data received from it. Celebrating losses and nongains equally and refusing to let gains discourage, because all gains are temporary unless I give up all my successful strategies. I tell myself, " there is no starting over, just backsliding, wallowing and moving on - so which are you going to choose, Colleen?"

2. Following an effective food and activity plan as best I can (moderately low carb, portion controlled seems to work best). If I have and follow no plan, or a terrible one, I will gain. I can stall (or to put a more positive spin on it, MAINTAIN) on an a faulty or imperfectly followed plan, and I will lose successfuly on a better or more closely followed plan.

3. Avoiding crash and starvation dieting, which tends to (for me, anyway) trigger almost bulimic, behavior. I can avoid the binge/starve cycle if I don't try to cut calories too far (and I can recognize "too far" by the reemergence of bingeing)

If I abandon my strategies and attitudes, I WILL gain. Only that knowledge and continuing to act on that knowledge will make this "the last time."

Streudel
06-14-2014, 03:51 PM
I think this is it for me because I have finally accepted that I have to do this for the rest of my life. Just like it took accepting that I could never smoke another cigarette if I wanted to stay smoke free.

I used to think that there were exceptions for stress, illness, death in the family, celebrations, etc. There are not. If I decide to use an excuse to return to old habits, that excuse will not protect me from weight gain any more than telling myself that it was JUST ONE cigarette kept me from going back to my 2 pack a day habit EVERY SINGLE TIME .

I've been smoke free for 10 years now, and I truly don't miss it at all. Not even when my life is stressful. Which as a single mom is pretty much all of the time. :lol: I know I'll come to a point where I don't miss abusing food when I'm stressed out too.

berryblondeboys
06-14-2014, 05:16 PM
Well, if you would have asked me in 2012 if this was IT, I would have emphatically said, "Yes!" However, the entire year of 2013 was a struggle. First it was just gain and lose 15-20 of the 110 pounds lost, but eventually I just totally lost all motivation and just worked on trying to get through the next day. I hadn't given up, but I lost all control. The whole idea of food doesn't feel as good has as being fit, thin and healthy left me. Food tasted glorious. And I was so depressed...

So, I just detailed this in my blog yesterday. I can know what is good for me right here and now. I know how to eat, how to move, how to keep my head about me, but it takes a lot of control and concentration. I can't know if this is what I will need for the future. I just hope that I have set up more ways to help me so that when things get difficult, I can stop the damage before gaining a ton back.

ubergirl
06-14-2014, 06:23 PM
I hadn't given up, but I lost all control. The whole idea of food doesn't feel as good has as being fit, thin and healthy left me. Food tasted glorious. And I was so depressed...

This is exactly what happened to me.

What is more puzzling than anything is that the state of mind that allows us to click and and lose well seems to arrive unexpectedly, like a gift.

But in my experiences, that state of mind can also flee unexpectedly, leaving you unable to summon the exact same thoughts and feelings that used to work.

I do not believe that regain is inevitable. A number of my "losing sisters" from back in 2009 and 2010 kept the weight off.

I think the trick is, as Melissa said, to realize that what is going on in our lives and our mental states can change DRAMATICALLY and when that happens, sometimes the interest in weight loss and maintenance can recede.

It's as if you have a four bedroom house in your mind, and one of those bedrooms belongs to weight loss and maintenance. It's not the ONLY thing on your mind, but it's one of the major things. Another bedroom is taken up by work, and one by family, and maybe one by money, and it's a full house.

So, what happens when an unexpected visitor shows up and demands a room in your house? (in my case, it was twins-- one was a child's serious illness and the other was a parent's serious illness) That visitor moves into one of the bedrooms, and guess what happens to weight loss and maintenance? Maybe it gets an air mattress on the back porch, or maybe it just gets exiled for a while.

I know that might seem like a weird analogy, but I feel like that's how it works for me, and maybe for others.

My point being that there may not actually be a "this is it" for anyone, but if we have super good strategies in place for dealing with that moment when suddenly managing our weight seems unimportant THEN maybe we'll be in a good position to maintain for the long haul.

apo9
06-14-2014, 06:55 PM
I am like Streudel...I have decided that just like smoking chronic overeating is no longer part of my life.I also quit smoking many years ago and do not miss it.
I have decided to follow the 3 s diet...no seconds,no sugars,no snacks and have maintained a personal low of 136 lb.I have not been 136 for over 40 years and am not any hungrier than I was when I was constantly eating.
Now when I have hunger pangs I look at the clock and if it is at 11am I tell myself to wait till 12 and I will eat lunch.I may occasionally have a protein drink at 3pm to hold me off till 5 or 6pm for dinner.
I have sometimes even stopped eating in the middle of a meal because I have had enough(and save it for the next meal).
I have never been like this before.
My daily calorie count is between 1400 and 1800 per day.
I can now save things for the next day without feeling that I have to devour it now before it disappears.
I dont know how to express it but things are different and I feel I have more control over food.

Katy Did
06-14-2014, 07:03 PM
Ever since I joined 3fc in March 2012, I have thought repeatedly that THIS IS IT (FINALLY). My lifestyle has consistently improved over the last 2 years - I haven't lost much weight, but I have very slowly been making better choices about food and exercise (not always consistently and regularly, depending on the season - but I think that there is general improvement and more self awareness).

In the last few weeks, I have felt very recommitted to losing weight and getting healthier and have had a strong feeling of THIS IS REALLY IT FOR REAL NO JOKING. I can't say for certain that this is really it forever but it's IT for now, so I'm gladly embracing the motivation and dedication while I have it.

berryblondeboys
06-14-2014, 08:04 PM
This is exactly what happened to me.

What is more puzzling than anything is that the state of mind that allows us to click and and lose well seems to arrive unexpectedly, like a gift.

But in my experiences, that state of mind can also flee unexpectedly, leaving you unable to summon the exact same thoughts and feelings that used to work.

I do not believe that regain is inevitable. A number of my "losing sisters" from back in 2009 and 2010 kept the weight off.

I think the trick is, as Melissa said, to realize that what is going on in our lives and our mental states can change DRAMATICALLY and when that happens, sometimes the interest in weight loss and maintenance can recede.

It's as if you have a four bedroom house in your mind, and one of those bedrooms belongs to weight loss and maintenance. It's not the ONLY thing on your mind, but it's one of the major things. Another bedroom is taken up by work, and one by family, and maybe one by money, and it's a full house.

So, what happens when an unexpected visitor shows up and demands a room in your house? (in my case, it was twins-- one was a child's serious illness and the other was a parent's serious illness) That visitor moves into one of the bedrooms, and guess what happens to weight loss and maintenance? Maybe it gets an air mattress on the back porch, or maybe it just gets exiled for a while.

I know that might seem like a weird analogy, but I feel like that's how it works for me, and maybe for others.

My point being that there may not actually be a "this is it" for anyone, but if we have super good strategies in place for dealing with that moment when suddenly managing our weight seems unimportant THEN maybe we'll be in a good position to maintain for the long haul.

This is excellent.

Frances123
06-14-2014, 08:29 PM
Ubergirl - I *did* find therapy helpful! I went for about 4 months, mainly because I had a pretty good idea of what it was in the past that was 'eating' me (my parents both abandoned me when I was in elementary school and I grew up in a very chaotic home). I agree with what you said about the support, too, and how chaos can unexpectedly enter our lives and throw our eating plans for a loop. One of the things I love about my life now is that if I feel stress, I want to exercise, not overeat. I still binge, but it's only a few times a year now, and not NEARLY as bad as it used to be. I still struggle with my love of food, though. I love to bake, and I love to eat. I love how eating sweets makes me feel. When I'm down, there's nothing like ice cream and brownies, you know? But I do feel like I have better coping mechanisms now, and the best support ever with my husband.

I love everyone else's points, too...I think it's so helpful to identify WHY this HAS to be it this time. Frankly, how it was at 265 pounds is still painfully fresh in my mind. I can't ever, ever go back to that dark place again. I have pictures and journals in case I need a reminder.

FatAbbi
06-15-2014, 01:00 AM
Same here.

Therapy
Have thrown out all my clothes once they don't fit.

activeadventurer
06-15-2014, 08:45 AM
I guess I never have the feeling this is the final time. I feel that I have a lifelong affliction that I have to be vigilant about every single day. That does not mean I sit around and obsess about it but have an awareness in my mind that any day could be the beginning of a downhill slide. I am definitely a one day at a time kind of person. I set goals but am aware that anything could happen.

Imnowonderwoman
06-16-2014, 06:48 AM
The last time I lost 100lbs it's was definitely a "this is it" time. I knew I would never be this big again...but years later here I am. With most of that weight back on. I think in retrospect I got too comfortable and thought I could take a "break" when I started a new job. But that was three years ago.

This time around I want that certainty but I have doubts. I'm terrifies I will end up like my 65 year old aunt who just had kidney failure and a heart attack, not to mention she's a diabetic and she can't walk from the kitchen to the living room without sounding like she ran a marathon. I'm 32 and I swore I'd be thin by 30. This will be my third journey in 10 years. I guess it's safe to say I've failed myself and I'm scared to be confident incase I let myself down again.

That being said I am more careful this time about being slack. I try not to be to cockey about it. I need to be vigilant and consistent so that I don't give up. I need to keep going. No one will do this for me and I can't take "breaks" because this is a life journey not just a weight loss journey. There is no finish line just goals and accomplishments along the way. I have to make this a perminant change or my kids will be visiting me in the hospital one day thinking they are loosing me too soon.

time2lose
06-16-2014, 10:55 AM
Such an interesting thread that really touches home for me. Reading the posts, I kept nodding my head in agreement. It is comforting seeing others that have the same thoughts and struggles that I have/had. I was going to quote all of your wonderful posts that pertain to me, but that would make this way too long! :)

I really hope that this is it but can not be sure. In the 90's, I lost 100+ pounds and regain all plus more very quickly. Then a few years ago I lost 100+ pounds and regained half before I put the brakes on by asking for help.

My current weight loss effort is focused on maintaining more than losing. I am developing strategies that I hope will keep me from gaining again.

* I believe that accepting the possibility of regain helps keep me focused on not starting down the wrong path. Fear is a powerful motivator. Example: In college drug use was rampant around me. It was the 70s, during the love child era but I know that it has probably been the same ever since. I was tempted to indulge just a little but the firm belief that one hit on a joint would make me a complete drug addict kept me from touching it.

* I have accepted that I can never go back to eating the way I used to eat. That there are some foods that I can never have again on a daily basis, maybe even on an occasional basis.

* Daily weighing or at least weekly weighing. Avoiding the scales is usually one of the first signs that I am slipping.

* I remember often the problems that my huge amount of excess weight caused. Going back to that would really diminish my life style.

* I am trying to find a realistic goal weight that I can maintain. My goal weight may (probably will) be as high as many people's starting weight. However, my life is so much better at 180 than it was at 280 - 300. I will be better off maintaining 180 than going down to a perfect 135 and struggling.

* As part of finding that goal weight, I have started having maintenance breaks to be sure that I can realistically maintain my current weight. I think that all future weight loss will be done in 5 to 10 pound segments with months of maintenance between. Speed is not a concern at this point.

* I have a plan for if/when that regain starts. I will ask for help before I regain half the weight, even if I am not sure now what type of help that will need to be. I will see a doctor that specializes in weight loss, a therapist, OA, or whatever type help seems appropriate at the time. Even though it would be a last approach, I would even turn to a surgeon.

* I would not be true to myself if I do not include my spiritual aspect of this. I pray everyday for help from God.

Frances123
06-16-2014, 12:44 PM
Love your post, time2lose!

ubergirl
06-16-2014, 12:49 PM
Cheryl, what a thoughtful, wonderful, and inspiring post.

You have highlighted so many individual issues that stood in my own way that I think it's worth commenting on some of the points individually.

* I am trying to find a realistic goal weight that I can maintain. My goal weight may (probably will) be as high as many people's starting weight. However, my life is so much better at 180 than it was at 280 - 300. I will be better off maintaining 180 than going down to a perfect 135 and struggling.

I can't stress enough how good an idea this is! One of the things that really threw me for a loop personally was that I never reached my "goal" weight. I was shooting for normal BMI, and didn't see any reason I couldn't get there-- since I knew that was my weight in college. But at age 50, after 20 years of being morbidly obese, I could not get there. At 30 lbs over my goal I was fit enough to run four miles, my body fat percentage measured as within the normal range, and I was out of plus size clothes. I'd give anything to be there again, and I wished I had mentally said to myself-- this is it, your job is to stay here, rather than still fantasizing about getting smaller.

* As part of finding that goal weight, I have started having maintenance breaks to be sure that I can realistically maintain my current weight. I think that all future weight loss will be done in 5 to 10 pound segments with months of maintenance between. Speed is not a concern at this point.


Also an excellent idea. Take some time to enjoy the fact that your life is SO MUCH
BETTER at the lower weight, rather than always chasing after the goal of being lower.

* I have a plan for if/when that regain starts. I will ask for help before I regain half the weight, even if I am not sure now what type of help that will need to be. I will see a doctor theater specializes in weight loss, a therapist, OA, or whatever type help seems appropriate at the time. Even though it would be a last approach, I would even turn to a surgeon.

How I wish I had done this! When the going got rough, my online support group simply wasn't enough.

Novus
06-16-2014, 02:11 PM
For me being successful and knowing "this is it" was about figuring out what my body needs/wants for optimal health and how to achieve that in a way that is logical and manageable.

I lost a significant amount of weight in 2005/06 but I did it with a very restrictive diet and an enormous of exercise. Then...a few life changes....and none of that was sustainable anymore....and I totally lost focus and regained.

In 2010, I focused mostly on exercise. I could run a 5K but I was still fat.

So, I took the time (2 years!) to really figure out a plan that incorporated what I knew about my body and was totally doable forever. In January 2013, I put that plan into action....and it's working.

Last November, the plan was really put to the test. I severed the tendons in my finger and had to have surgery. I could barely cook or wash dishes so I was pretty much dependent on other people to prepare meals for me. I had to ask for what I needed and/or figure out how to eat what I was given. And I couldn't exercise (at the advice of pt) so I was a lazy blob for months.

Plus, it was the worst winter since the beginning of time so I was depressed in addition to being in pain and stressed out. So, yeah, awfulness. I gained during those 6 months but only about 15 pounds....in the past I could have easily put on at least double that amount. And as soon as things got sorted, I got back on plan.

So, in conclusion, I believe THIS IS IT because (a) it's doable (b) it's working and (c) it passed the "getting derailed" test.

Could I be wrong? Absolutely. But I'm being totally optimistic that I'm right. :)

LaurieDawn
06-16-2014, 03:30 PM
I find this thread interesting and inspirational. Thanks for posting it.

For me, the answer is that I don't know that this will be the last time. In fact, I'm guessing that it won't be the last time. I am hoping that I will lose a significant amount this time, and that the next time I struggle with regain, I will only backslide a little bit. I have kept 40 pounds off for about two years now. I consider that a victory, even if I have also gained 40 pounds back.

But really - what's the alternative? Accepting all of the challenging aspects of being overweight and not enjoying the intoxicating feeling of being on plan?

I know I love it when I am in control of my food and I'm exercising regularly. I just acquired two stepsons, in addition to my own children, and one of them loves to play football and soccer and basketball. I love those sports too. Both of them like to race back to the car or around the block and have water gun fights, etc. So, even if this isn't the "last time," I feel really good about making choices that will help me bond with my new stepsons in a non-threatening way and continue to do things with my children that I love.

It might not be the last time, but I am hoping to hang onto my present commitment as long as possible and squeeze every last drop of joy from these good habits. And that I will love it enough to make the sacrifice to go through the first few agonizing days/weeks of being on plan the next time it's necessary to start again.

ubergirl
06-16-2014, 03:59 PM
I find this thread interesting and inspirational. Thanks for posting it.

For me, the answer is that I don't know that this will be the last time. In fact, I'm guessing that it won't be the last time. I am hoping that I will lose a significant amount this time, and that the next time I struggle with regain, I will only backslide a little bit. I have kept 40 pounds off for about two years now. I consider that a victory, even if I have also gained 40 pounds back.

This is such a good point! One thing that I'm proud of is that I have NEVER once, since June 2009, gone back to my high weight, or gotten so completely out of shape that I couldn't exercise. I've never gone back to the original size 24 I was in. Between 1991 and 2009, there was only one story. UP. Now, I've managed, on average, to keep my weight about 40lbs lower than it was when I started out. (right now, I'm 14 lbs above that, but I'm working on it!) It's a process, not a destination.

Michou
06-16-2014, 05:24 PM
very nice thread we are all in the same boat and most regained for the same reasons. Last spring I was feeling like a total failure because of the weight I had regained, I put back half the pounds I had lost. I went to see the nutritionist I had seen the first time and she made me realise that it was not a fail, that I was still 30 pounds lighter than when I started. So she told me it will be easy :0) you have half of what you had to accomplish last time, so here I am today and it might not be the last time but I inow I can do it.

flower123
06-18-2014, 08:18 PM
I am really liking reading the posts on this thread. its like a miracle that I found this community. I cant imagine why no engine search led me here sooner.

I do not know that this is it. This is the final time. I knew it when I gave up smoking all those years ago. But with food its different. I do not know. I live in fear of slipping. I live in fear of food. Even when I am maintaining the intense desire for fattning foods is still there.

Anyway, the last major loss ( 100 lbs) was about 15 years ago. But there have been minor gains and losses since then. Perhaps there have been 35 lbs involved in the gain and loss since. Significant enough so i was overweight during that time. Felt that familiar shame. i cannot go back even there. And yet I know that threat is always looming.

I do not think fear is a good motivator in life. However, I do not have another one. It is the pure fear of gaining back yet again, the weight I have lost. That's what keeps me in check. But its exhausting. Walking on ( breaded deep fried) eggshells.

I have been very diligent. But a series of events this year caused me to waiver in my vigilance. Each event in the series causing me to become a bit more lax in the vigilance. Finally I find myself at the next step in a crossroad.

But for now, this is it. I am not going to go back to the old eating pattern. I stepped into it for several days. I am back on track ( I say half believing myself). Am I in the clear? No. Will I ever be out of danger of relapse? Probably not. It is vigilance and determination that are my ally. Still I do not know if these allies are strong enough. For today, I believe they are. But its a rough road. REALLY hard.

synger
06-19-2014, 01:54 PM
This isn't it. This is never it.

I have been obese my entire adult life, and I'll be 50 this year. I have been insulin resistant since High School, have PCOS, and am now pre-Diabetic. My metabolism is officially "broken."

Just like an alcoholic will always have a taste for alcohol, I will always have a craving to overeat. I have a lifetime of coping-using-food habits that are ingrained. I may sand and buff them, but even when they fade they'll still be there and will have some pull on me.

I have spent the past five years coming to terms with the idea that I will always have to watch what I eat if I don't want to progress from pre-D to full-blown Diabetes. Strangely, it's also helped a lot with me dealing with my attitude toward dieting.

I mean, we throw around terms like "way of eating" instead of "diet", but with our scale goals and our loose skin posts and our healthy-bucket-lists (what will I do when I lose X?) we still speak in terms of "now" (when I'm dieting) and "then" (when I'm no longer dieting). The more I read of maintainers, the more I realize that "then" will be very much like "now."

I will NEVER be able to eat the amount and types of food I once did without blood sugar issues and weight gain.

There is no "last time." This is life. Gaining, relosing, making choices every single day.

ubergirl
06-19-2014, 02:23 PM
There is no "last time." This is life. Gaining, relosing, making choices every single day.

Yes. What I've found is that "it's a lifestyle change" until it isn't. I completely get over bingeing until I start again. I find losing weight effortless until it becomes impossible.

I'm trying to learn to work within that reality.

LaurieDawn
06-20-2014, 10:38 AM
Yes. What I've found is that "it's a lifestyle change" until it isn't. I completely get over bingeing until I start again. I find losing weight effortless until it becomes impossible.

I'm trying to learn to work within that reality.

Both this and what Synger said. Yes. With "this time," which is in its infancy stage for me, I am feeling great and thinking some of the same old thoughts. "This feels so good." "This isn't hard." "I don't understand why I don't do this all the time." But I have enough experience to know that those thoughts are fleeting. So, I am going to love them while they last, not trust in them too much, and keep finding and working strategies that work for me right now.

Frances123
06-21-2014, 08:44 AM
Pattience, I think you're so right about being able to recognize that you've started a re-gain and address the reasons why it's happening...and stop it in its tracks! I've never, ever maintained before...just clawed my way to a low weight using unhealthy practices, and I was unable to stay put. That's one reason why I'm much more confident this time. This is the first time I've done this slowly and in a healthy way. I feel much more informed this time as well, and I've never before had faith that I could really accomplish this - I do now.

I quit sweets for a while, but that's not a sustainable lifestyle for me. I've learned to just be very moderate with my intake and also be very choosy about what I eat. No more fast food brownies for me again, EVER. I will wait for QUALITY! I made a fabulous berry pie last week from scratch, crust too. I didn't have a slice, but maybe every other day, whenever I:

1) had a craving, AND
2) had exercised
3) felt in control
4) had the spare calories

...I had a spoonful or two of pie and counted 50 calories. I'm working on a "good 90% of the time" program and it's one that really fits into my lifestyle. If I see that I want to keep going back to a sweet, I send it to work with my husband. Out of sight, out of mind! If it starts to get out of control, I stop baking for a few weeks. Then I resume. I feel like I *will* be able to work this into my life, with these safeguards in place. I finally feel like I'm in a really good place with things, but recognize that I need to be ultra-vigilant...for life.

mam1958
06-21-2014, 10:12 AM
I love this thread. I too have been procrastinating to get going on my journey.

20 years ago I lost 119 pds. It was hard work but felt wonderful. I WANT that feeling back.

One thing I have read in a book is to watch how skinny people do it. One thing I have noticed is that they NEVER let a gain get past 5 pds.

They get right back on their program. My aunt lost 40 pds 50 yrs ago this is one of the first things she told me.

I never had the courage before to ask until recently.

Also she takes small amounts of food when eating and never take seconds on anything.

She does not eat any types of dressings (mayo., salad). Vinegar is her go to dressing or mustards.

I know this time I want it to be the last time. I am so miserable this way. I want to retire and enjoy it and not in a wheelchair. Or on oxygen.

Lastly a dear friend of mine did mention something not to scare me but as a fact. It really opened my eyes. You don't see very many overweight older people in their 70's, or 80's.

And I intend to live into my 90's.......

Frances123
06-21-2014, 10:23 AM
In the past, I wasn't able to be moderate. One thing that's really helped me is my workouts. I'm VERY committed to my current fitness and building upon it. I work out very hard, and eating healthier has made me realize that I need to "fuel the mule" as I call it. When I eat junk, I don't feel well. It affects my workouts, and that negatively affects my live as well. Now I'm not tempted to eat as much sugar, because it hamstrings everything else in my life! The realization that a small amount is okay, but anything bigger makes me feel awful and ruins my workouts, seems to be the motivation I need. The MAIN TIME I need to worry is during TOM. My sweet tooth is raging then and I have to be careful NOT to bake and try NOT to have anything sweet at all.

I know what you mean about the regain anytime, and the thin people not letting the weight get more than a 5 lb jump on you. This time around, I will have that plan in place. Can you believe I never did before? I've had about every stressful situation already happen (career change, marital change, death of a close family member, move to another state) over the past 6 years...I hope it has helped to prepare me for the future and how NOT to let those things trigger a food response!

mam1958, you're so right about getting right back on track! My husband is my biggest cheerleader and he helps me when I do get off track ("Don't wait until tomorrow. Do it right now!").

Neast
06-21-2014, 10:32 AM
I'm back again for the ninth time,maybe tenth. This is what did me in...., I am the highest weight I have ever been. We just came back from a Caribbean cruise. I was miserable, I couldnt fit in chairs, I was so exhausted I slept all day, I couldnt enjoy anything. This is it, things have to change, I am mentally exhausted and I NEED to be smaller for my health, mentally and physically.