Looking Good, Feeling Great - Bra size - so depressed




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chickadee2
06-11-2014, 03:51 PM
I was a 34B as a teenager, and a 36C in my 20s and 30s...had kids later in life - and in my 40s - my boobs just got so big - like the rest of me. Went from 130 pounds to pregnancy weight of 175ish - Then gained weight after the kids were born - they are 9 and 11 now. I just kept gaining weight. Highest number on the scale I ever saw was 237. I tried on bras and tried to experiment - 40DD seemed to fit right. I even went to Macys and had a "bra expert" measure me - she was a very sweet senior - and seemed to know her stuff.
So meanwhile - I finally started to lose the weight - after carrying it around with me for 10 years - I have lost 41 pounds - I am in "onederland" again for the first time in a decade - great.
I have lost inches. Great. Lost almost 10 in my stomach. Great. My bra size - band width is now a 38 instead of 40. Great. But - I went to a bra speciality store to get properly measured - and I am an H cup. An H!
She said since I was losing weight - that I could get by on the G cup - I do have one boob that is seriously bigger than the other - but she said most people go down in bra size every 20 pounds. I am so depressed over this - even though it's just a "number" -
I have long thought about breast reduction - but I hate the idea of "going under" - then when I read stories and hear about the drain and the pain - I don't know if I could stand it. I know I still have at least 55 pounds to go - to reach 145 - My dream would be 135 - but I will be happy with anything in the 140s.
I wonder what the heck the chances are - as I continue to lose weight - IF I continue to lose weight - if I will drop in cup size as well.
I hate my boobs! They are so heavy - and it's IMPOSSIBLE to find tops that fit me correctly because the boobs pull the shirts UP - so my stomach falls OUT - some of my shirts are too big on me now - but still having a problem shopping. Like for a one piece bathing suit - try finding one that fits a 38H - that has a 14/16 for the bottom of it! Anything online for a 38H chest has a much larger size than I am - like 22 or 24 and even higher sizes. I can wear 14s and 16s now - but my boobs - ugh - what a curse. My mom does not have big boobs - neither did any of my grandmothers or great-grandmothers - nobody knows where they came from. Sorry to vent - really depressed about them - I know I should focus on the 41 pounds - and keep my eye on my goal - and hope for the best - that they MIGHT go down in cup size. Sigh. Sorry! Thank you! I rarely post - but I should more often - I had looked forward to posting in the "GOAL" and MINIGOAL board - and once I hit onederland - I didn't even bother because I'm still so depressed over the size of these girls! Happy day everyone!


Novus
06-11-2014, 04:29 PM
About the swimsuits - separates instead of a one-piece. Buy a tankini that comes in bra sizes (and has lots of support and underwire) and a comfortable bottom in the appropriate size. (Check out herroom.com (http://www.herroom.com/) or Linda's (http://www.lindasonline.com/swimwear.html). They have some great stuff.)

About the girls - breast tissue is almost entirely fat so as you lose fat there is hope that the boobs will shrink. Just keep losing weight, be patient, and wait and see what happens. I know that's not as easy as it sounds. I hate my monster boobage as well.

Durian
06-11-2014, 04:45 PM
I understand. I would try not to stress about where you will be until you get there.

I don't want to be negative, but if I'm honest, even when I was 125 pounds, I was busty. It is just part of my body and will be until I have a reduction. Getting properly sized is always a shock. Don't let it consume you.


Claygirl1518
06-11-2014, 05:51 PM
I just went through the same thing. The lady who measured me said that the smaller your band size is, the bigger your cup size becomes. So, I used to wear a 40C, and now that ive lost weight I'm a 38DDD. Huge difference! Don't worry about your cup size, keeping track of your measurements is the best way to see your progress. We all know womens sizes are always screwed up and make us feel bad, don't let that get you down about the famtastic progress you have made!

Valkyrie1
06-11-2014, 06:49 PM
Go to the doctor and start the documentation process for breast reduction. Do you have back and neck pain? Have him chart it. Skin rashes under your breast? Have him document that.

I had a breast reduction over a year ago. It was covered by insurance. I went from a 38 or 40 DDD to a 36C. I am very pleased with it. It was not vey painful, and I had no drain. I do have one portion of scar that is thick and keloid, but other than that, I'm happy.

Nanu
06-12-2014, 05:08 AM
Hi Chickadee. I share your frustrations about shirts and finding clothes to fit :hug:

Whenever I complain to my friends they look horrified that I would want smaller boobs :D

Try not to focus on bra size or dress size. Shop sizing varies massively so just try to find clothes that fit you well. I've long given up on wearing shirts (unless they are very loose fitting) and look for clothes that will flatter my shape. V necks, wraps and fabrics with some stretch are all good. It can be tempting to try on and buy things that you like the look of, but if it doesn't do anything for your shape you have to forget about it and move on.

Since I've adopted this approach, I've feel like some dresses look better on me than they do on the model or mannequin! :D

Novus
06-12-2014, 05:27 AM
The lady who measured me said that the smaller your band size is, the bigger your cup size becomes.

Correct. Cup size is measured as the number of inches larger than band size. For example, D is 4 inches larger than band size. So, with a 34 inch band, a D cup is 38 inches, whereas with a 40 inch band, a D cup would be 44 inches.

For the OP, if you understand how bras are sized, you will see that your new H bra is not really different from your DD. DD is 5 inches larger than band size, so 40 + 5 = 45. H is 8 inches larger than band size so 38 + 8 = 46.

Also, if for the first fitting you were in a store that only sells up to a DD, which is true for many department stores, they would have called DD close enough and found a style that would give enough coverage to make it work in order to make their sale. You may in fact have been larger at your higher weight but wearing the wrong bra size.

Pattience
06-12-2014, 05:35 AM
Surely it is certain your boobs will shrink as you lose weight. Consider a breast reduction for a reward when you get to your ideal weight on the basis of now you know you really hate them when they are at their best rather than tackle the issue before you even know how manageable they are at a lower weight.

If you were slim when you were 36C i would expect to go back to that size when you get back to the same weight.

Do you are have any other reason for being depressed. I mean is depression an issue for you anyway or is it just the big boobs that are making you feel a miserable. If you really are depressed, then get help for that. When we are not depressed, we can cope much better with all sorts of other difficulties.

chickadee2
06-12-2014, 07:03 AM
Each one of you has given great advice! Thank you so much!!! Great tips all around, very much appreciate your time!

Olivia7906
06-12-2014, 07:25 AM
Oooooooh do I know about the big boob situation. I know EXACTLY how you feel. I wear a size 12 but my bra size is 36G. I can't wear practically any dresses that have the boob cups in them already. Trying to get a good fit in the chest area is my biggest challenge. I'm also hoping that in the 140's, I won't have such a challenge. Let's both cross our fingers :D

seagirl
06-12-2014, 07:43 AM
I am a 34H (and happy to wear an H because it is actually the right size!) and I have a breast reduction scheduled for September. There is a website called realself.com that has tons of reviews and pictures of the surgery (and other surgeries) with people leaving reviews of their recovery and progress. I have found it very helpful.

Your breasts won't necessarily get smaller as you lose weight. Hormone changes over the years can make them larger and stay that way. But in general surgeons like you to be at a stable weight before they operate so you don't lose volume after the surgery.

There is nothing to be lost by beginning to research surgeons, looking up your insurance coverage for the procedure and having a consultation.

Wannabeskinny
06-12-2014, 08:11 AM
I feel your pain, I wear a 38H and it's so difficult to try to fit these into anything. It doesn't help that I'm pear shaped and my shoulders are incredibly petite which emphasizes my bust even more. Buying clothes? Nearly impossible.

I know it sounds weird but it makes me feel the opposite of feminine! I've spoken about breast reduction before and my husband just looks at me like I have 3 heads. But seriously it's hard to feel sexy with large breasts. Plus all the unwanted attention is annoying.

Thanks seagirl for suggesting that site, it's helpful to see real pictures of before and after surgery. I'm thinking that one day I'll go in for a reduce and lift. Good luck on your surgery!

Munchy
06-12-2014, 09:25 AM
Oooooooh do I know about the big boob situation. I know EXACTLY how you feel. I wear a size 12 but my bra size is 36G. I can't wear practically any dresses that have the boob cups in them already. Trying to get a good fit in the chest area is my biggest challenge. I'm also hoping that in the 140's, I won't have such a challenge. Let's both cross our fingers :D

Yep! I wear a size 2/4 and a 32DDD. Target replaced my favorite cami for years with ones with shelf bras in them :mad:

Not to mention the $75 bras I buy from Norstrom :mad:

Wannabeskinny
06-12-2014, 09:32 AM
Yep! I wear a size 2/4 and a 32DDD. Target replaced my favorite cami for years with ones with shelf bras in them :mad:

Not to mention the $75 bras I buy from Norstrom :mad:

My mother always tells me I'm spending too much money on bras. Easy to say for B-C cup. If I buy a cheap bra it falls apart in month, completely loses its shape! I have to shell out for quality bras.

berryblondeboys
06-12-2014, 09:49 AM
Add me to the big boobs gals.

I wore at top weight a 40G/H.

At 165 a 34F.

Yes, my boobs got a LITTLE smaller, but not much. But, you can get clothes that fit you and swimsuits that fit you. Just not at the mall.

Look online for swimsuits with your cup size - you will be amazed at what is out there.

And I feel you on the tops and bottoms starting to be a problem. When I got to my lowest weight, I had to wear a larger dress size for the boobs and they were too big in the hips.

But, don't jump on the boob job wagon until you've reached your goal weight and maintained it a bit. That way you can get them reduced and perked up if you want. Not work it to me, but it is for many.

Munchy
06-12-2014, 10:03 AM
One of my favorite summer dresses is actually a maternity dress in XS. It fits my body, but it's roomy in the bust.

2salads
06-29-2014, 05:53 PM
Oh I'm a big boober with the rash (deoderant helps here. I want a reduction but that is in the distant future after I've lost weight. Right now I am wear a sports bra most of the time. It doesn't give me lift but I absolutely HATE under wire bras. Anyone know of good soft cups with lots of support? I am a DD (probably should be an F)

Wannabeskinny
06-30-2014, 07:30 AM
Oh I'm a big boober with the rash (deoderant helps here. I want a reduction but that is in the distant future after I've lost weight. Right now I am wear a sports bra most of the time. It doesn't give me lift but I absolutely HATE under wire bras. Anyone know of good soft cups with lots of support? I am a DD (probably should be an F)

There is absolutely no such thing a a soft cup that can lift any size over D. I long to wear soft bras but the truth is the truth, I'd like to fit in a size 8jeans but I have to wear 16. You just accept it and it gets easier. Soft cups for us =droopy boobs. I did recently buy a soft cup bra at lane Bryant and it did hold up the girls nicely, but it stretched out of shape within a week. Now I wear it around the house for chores etc. no way am I wearing it out in public, the droop factor still reigns.

2salads
06-30-2014, 08:16 AM
There is absolutely no such thing a a soft cup that can lift any size over D. I long to wear soft bras but the truth is the truth, I'd like to fit in a size 8jeans but I have to wear 16. You just accept it and it gets easier. Soft cups for us =droopy boobs. I did recently buy a soft cup bra at lane Bryant and it did hold up the girls nicely, but it stretched out of shape within a week. Now I wear it around the house for chores etc. no way am I wearing it out in public, the droop factor still reigns.

I was afraid someone was going to say that. :(

regrvk
06-30-2014, 04:41 PM
Ladies -
Well I just had a reduction, literally 6 weeks ago. I was like all of you posting - all my life, too large for my clothes and as i got older i felt i looked more and more matronly. So i started a diet and scheduled my surgery. I started at 204 by the time i got to surgery i was down to 190. I am now down to 178 (ok 4 pounds came off surgically :-) )

I have to say i am very happy. I am 6 weeks post op. I went from a 42F to a 40D.

AndIi am more motivated now than ever to finish loosing weight.

A side benefit iIhave in the skin on my chest looks younger, before it was all crinkly where my cleavage was. But when they do the reduction all that gets tightened up. So people think I had neck surgery or a face lift, but it is my neckline - looks healthier, smoother.

I am not advocating surgery - it is not for everyone. I had been thinking about it for the last 15 years. I realize my breasts just kept getting bigger and i was thinking about as I get old (i am 56 now) - how physical will I be able to be? How spontaneous will I be when I am 65 about physical activity? So i went for it to make me more active as i get older.

It is major surgery but i recovered pretty quickly - i was driving after a week and a couple of days. I was sore and bruised for about 4 weeks. Definitely no lifting for 5 or 6 weeks...

Anyway that is my story....

Wannabeskinny
06-30-2014, 05:43 PM
Congratulations regvrk! How exciting for you. We all know this is not an easy decision to make but m so glad you made the choice do it. May I ask why you didn't go smaller? I'm a G-H and would want to go all the way down to a perfect C cup!!

regrvk
06-30-2014, 05:50 PM
Congratulations regvrk! How exciting for you. We all know this is not an easy decision to make but m so glad you made the choice do it. May I ask why you didn't go smaller? I'm a G-H and would want to go all the way down to a perfect C cup!!


Amazingly enough I feel like I look quite small! I wanted to stay proportional. They do not seem big at all, but i guess I am so used to big for so long.
I went from measuring 46 inches at widest spot to 41".

The bra sizers say I should be a 36D or 38D - but the band is way too tight on me. SO i like it looser (maybe because i just had surgery)

I had a friend who had the surgery 6 weeks before me - and she went smaller. I thought it didn't look proportional. I am 5'7

so it is personal i think.