Depression and Weight Issues - Fellow eating disorder people?




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BlueHorse17
03-23-2014, 08:36 PM
Over the years, the motivation of weight loss has turned into a drive once I reached close to my maintenance level. The past three months I have found myself in a mixture of binds. Some of the cases have been me only eating one meal every day for about 2 months, and then the past week I ended up binging about three times. Yes, I did beat myself up over it. I am happy with the clothing size I can finally fit into, after being obese my entire life, but I've noticed despite the smaller clothes, my eating habits are totally off-balance. It's like I have forgot how to eat small meals throughout the day, and I'm not sure anyone when I am hungry or just bored. There are also periods where I think that if I keep eating I will gain all the weight back. When I eat I stick mostly to 1,500 calories a day with exercise, and I have a pretty bad habit of measuring every little thing whether carrots, meat, tomatoes, cucumbers... It's tiresome and I wish that I could just eat visually-portioned meals without having to worry about gaining the weight back! (In case you are wondering, yes I am in the process of seeing a therapist.)

The past three days I did a pretty big binge. First day I ate around 3,500 calories, second day around 7,500 calories, and third day around 7,500 calories. I ate about a block of cheese, 12 eggs, 2 tubs of yogurt, 13 protein bars, 8oz of pork, a whole dish of bean dip, a loaf of bread, etc. None of it was sugary food, but I know a binge is still considered a binge. I did double exercise each day out of guilt, and my stomach is paying for it right now. I've been bloated and my body is swollen all over from water retention. One the plus side, during those couple of days my mood was better than it's been in months and I felt like I had a lot of energy. For now, I've been drinking a lot of water to try and flush out my system...

I'm mainly posting here to hear stories from other people, and if they were similar, how they got themselves to eat back on track and schedule.


seagirl
03-24-2014, 08:36 AM
It can sometimes be that it is our head that needs to get back on track, not our eating habits. The binging is a message that something isn't right. Have you thought about returning (or going) to therapy? Binging isn't just breaking a diet, it's a symptom of a much bigger problem - trying to numb pain, using food to deal with emotions, etc.

CindySunshine
03-24-2014, 09:24 AM
I don't know, dieting absolutely makes perfectly normal people binge. I have absolutely stopped binging since I have started intuitive eating and quit restricting myself. Food for thought anyway.


BlueHorse17
03-25-2014, 02:38 AM
Today I ate a little piece of chocolate which satisfied me. I think the binge really might have been from the fact that I have pretty much only been eating vegetables (as well as the same foods) for a few months. And I have scheduled an appointment with a therapist starting next week so this will be a process and we'll see where it goes. Good thing is that I'm trying to catch it ahead of time, I suppose.

christine123
03-25-2014, 03:01 AM
Today I ate a little piece of chocolate which satisfied me. I think the binge really might have been from the fact that I have pretty much only been eating vegetables (as well as the same foods) for a few months. And I have scheduled an appointment with a therapist starting next week so this will be a process and we'll see where it goes. Good thing is that I'm trying to catch it ahead of time, I suppose.

For me, I learned that bingeing or just overeating even, has been directly related to my moods and things going on internally. As I am working that out, I am more successful in managing the binges. For me, I have to allow myself to eat some junk food and not make any food off limits or the deprivation will have me bingeing until I am sick... An entire large pizza, a couple loaves of French bread with cheese, cinnamon bread, and an entire family size box of cereal with whole milk in one sitting. I am not sure how many calories... well over 7000, I imagine.

I have learned that I have a mood disorder and as it has been getting treated, my urge to binge has lessened. There are hard days still, but it's better. Hopefully the therapist will help you get to the source.

BlueHorse17
03-26-2014, 01:43 AM
Thank you and I love your signature Christine! I think I learned from my binge - I felt completely sick and since then haven't been eating all that much in one setting. Hopefully I'll reflect back on that in the future.

projectjudi
04-16-2014, 09:20 AM
Unfortunately I never seem to learn anything from my binges. I get so depressed and Hate myself. The important thing for me is to get back on track the next day.
There is a group on 3fatchicks called Chicks In Control. They deal with lots of binge eating and have an excellent list of books to read.
Hope this helps.
Hugs
Judi

Annie Mia
04-17-2014, 01:19 AM
I'm going through bulimic "recovery", so I totally get the whole, WTF is my body doing?! thing.
What I learned through my process so far, is that I have to be able to handle eating more than I want on occasion, because my body knows what's best for me.

I guess, just try to take everything in moderation, and find a balance of foods that suit you. Sometimes certain diet lifestyles just don't work, and tailoring food to meet your criteria healthily is a good step toward inner tranquility.
Don't chain yourself to just a certain group of "pure" or "evil" foods- because that's just that inner ED voice talking.

And if you need to go off the beaten path once in a while, then that's just another way of discontinuing the monotony of everyday life. Your body is kind of like a changing ecosystem, and if you binge one day...then you binged. It's just like a heavy rain season, but the environment knows how to get back to its normal setting.
Self loathing or restricting the next day will only continue the stress.

It's just so damn hard getting out of the hunger=>overeating=>shame=>hunger cycle... but you can do it!

Good luck, and I hope everything goes well with the therapist! :)

BrandyEyecandy
04-17-2014, 05:12 AM
Try Overeater Anonymous They Help Me Alottttttttttttttt

seabiscuit
04-18-2014, 12:14 AM
I used to binge, but I don't like I used to, I still overeat though. I am using a workbook called The Binge Eating and Compulsive Overeating Workbook. I like it, I find it very good. I find therapy helps too.

meandu
04-18-2014, 03:51 PM
I eat to fill the boredom in my life and also because I am depressed. Although I am learning how to control this issue it is still an ongoing process.