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03-03-2014, 10:24 AM
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#1
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Getting smaller everyday
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Louisville, Ky
Posts: 477
S/C/G: HW: 393/IP: 347/CW: 198/GW:175
Height: 5'6
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Do you ever get embarrassed by the weight that you've lost?
Weightloss is so psychologically frustrating. I get really embarrassed when people ask me just how much I've lost. It's not like I walked around with a veil on and they didn't know I was super fat but saying the number out loud to someone makes it more real I guess. Everyone is like "you should be so proud" and I am! I'm ecstatic at the success I've had thus far, but I'm upset with myself that I allowed myself to get that big in the first place. It's such a ying yang thing to go through.
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03-03-2014, 10:44 AM
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#2
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 157
S/C/G: 178/155/140
Height: 5'4"
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If it makes you uncomfortable, I don't think you should feel obligated to share a number with anyone. You could develop some kind of vague response or outright lie and say you've decided not to weigh yourself since you're looking for benefits in quality of life vs quantity of weightloss.
Frankly, it's no one else's business, especially if it makes you feel awkward.
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03-03-2014, 10:47 AM
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#3
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Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Illinois
Posts: 544
S/C/G: 190/137.5/140
Height: 5-4
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You could tell them the loss in BMI. Most people do not equate that well.
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03-03-2014, 10:55 AM
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#4
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maintaining since 9/2013
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: CA
Posts: 1,958
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You could thank them and say gently that you don't care to share that information--your comfort level is paramount! Setting limits is a good skill to strengthen, and this might be a way to practice. The compliments can be a mixed blessing. Overall the positive feedback is nice, but some days, it's just tiresome. As you continue to lose, you will hear more and more comments. I agree with poster above to work out some pre-made responses.
Congratulations on your stellar progress!
Last edited by mars735; 03-03-2014 at 10:56 AM.
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03-03-2014, 11:00 AM
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#5
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Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 8,219
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Go read the weekend chat, especially the comments from yesterday. There was a whole conversation about this. You'll definitely feel not as alone after reading it.
65x65 has some great info on how she has handled prying noses.
But, in essence, your weight is none of their business. Just as how much you weighed to start is none of their biz, neither is how much you weigh now or how much you have lost.
It could be as simple as saying, "I don't really want to talk specific numbers, it is too close to talking exact weight, which is a taboo subject. But thank you for the compliments, I really appreciate it."
Last edited by lisa32989; 03-03-2014 at 11:02 AM.
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03-03-2014, 11:24 AM
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#6
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IP start date 8/1/2013
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: New Orleans,La
Posts: 669
S/C/G: 195/138.6/130
Height: 4'10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lisa32989
Go read the weekend chat, especially the comments from yesterday. There was a whole conversation about this. You'll definitely feel not as alone after reading it.
65x65 has some great info on how she has handled prying noses.
But, in essence, your weight is none of their business. Just as how much you weighed to start is none of their biz, neither is how much you weigh now or how much you have lost.
It could be as simple as saying, "I don't really want to talk specific numbers, it is too close to talking exact weight, which is a taboo subject. But thank you for the compliments, I really appreciate it."
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Great advice Lisa, I struggle with the comments ppl make. Especially when they tell me I wasn't that big in the 1st place. It's like come on man! I was almost 200 lbs and In a size 18! I'm only 4'10 I was practically rolling around instead of walking! I'm headed over to catch up on the weekend chat!
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03-03-2014, 12:03 PM
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#7
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Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: upstate NY
Posts: 1,822
S/C/G: 214/211/150
Height: 5'5"
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I would just say "a lot" when I lost last time on IP. lol
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03-03-2014, 12:33 PM
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#8
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Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Gatineau, QC
Posts: 46
S/C/G: 236.5/224/160
Height: 5'
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nolasmurf
Great advice Lisa, I struggle with the comments ppl make. Especially when they tell me I wasn't that big in the 1st place. It's like come on man! I was almost 200 lbs and In a size 18! I'm only 4'10 I was practically rolling around instead of walking! I'm headed over to catch up on the weekend chat!
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I know what you mean! I often had the: "Why do this you look good this way... not sure if skinny is going to look good on you..." ?!?? (don't even know what they mean by that!! loll)
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03-03-2014, 01:16 PM
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#9
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Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Frederick Colorado (about 20 miles north of Denver)
Posts: 417
S/C/G: 265/see ticker/145
Height: 5'5"
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I don't get embarassed about how much weight I have lost. I have worked hard and am proud of my accomplishments.
However, I do get embarassed that I let my weight get so out of control in the first place.
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03-03-2014, 03:01 PM
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#10
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Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Southeastern CT
Posts: 314
S/C/G: 642 (IPstart 395.4)/226.2/160
Height: 5'7"
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Quote:
Originally Posted by watchoutforthatcar
Weightloss is so psychologically frustrating. I get really embarrassed when people ask me just how much I've lost. It's not like I walked around with a veil on and they didn't know I was super fat but saying the number out loud to someone makes it more real I guess. Everyone is like "you should be so proud" and I am! I'm ecstatic at the success I've had thus far, but I'm upset with myself that I allowed myself to get that big in the first place. It's such a ying yang thing to go through.
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Watchout,
As someone who has struggled with their weight for my entire life, I have times where I'm thrilled about my losses, and I want to shout it to the world (when I'm thinking about the future and how much progress I've made). There are other times when I am shamed and embarrassed about telling the truth when it comes to how much I've lost total (when I'm feeling negative or looking into the past in that "I can't believe that I was THAT big" kind of way.
In any event, what is right for me may not be right for you. I'm embracing my losses now and I have been telling people. It makes me feel good at the step that I'm in my journey to say "I'm doing great, I've lost *341.2*lbs" I should be proud of that...
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03-03-2014, 03:08 PM
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#11
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2004
Posts: 2,383
S/C/G: 274/?/175
Height: 5'8
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Congratulations on your great success. Just remember you are under no obligation to give details. I would just say something like "thanks so much for noticing/for the compliment. Yes, I've lost a lot! I'm working hard and it's paying off."
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03-03-2014, 05:13 PM
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#12
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Super Moderator
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Boston area
Posts: 12,143
S/C/G: 239/173/165
Height: 5'9"
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I used to say, "Could be 40 pounds." That seemed to satisfy. That it was 81 pounds was my private number.
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03-03-2014, 06:40 PM
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#13
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Renee~ Started IP Aug. 25
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Maryland, U.S.A.
Posts: 377
S/C/G: 186/136.4/125
Height: 5'4"
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I think of it like this: yes, I was embarrassed at a larger size, but it was more about my appearance, not at the number on the scale. However, I am super proud of the hard work I have put in on this plan to get where I am. I am proud of what I have learned and can share when asked. I am PROUD of my number- pounds and clothing size! Thus, I really do not mind talking about it when asked. (In fact, I am sure some of my peeps are sick of it! LOL)
I know I was obese, and I have to accept and OWN that fact in order to be able to work beyond it and keep it from EVER happening again. Shame cannot be helpful in this joirney we are all on. Accept what size you were, understand it, and control whatever it was that got you there. You cannot change the past; don't allow it to make you feel bad.
~Renee
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03-03-2014, 07:44 PM
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#14
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Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 1999
Location: Aylmer, Quebec
Posts: 884
S/C/G: 169/153.8/135
Height: 5'3"
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you ladies are all to polite - I'd tell them that I really didn't think it was any of their business!!!
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03-04-2014, 08:23 AM
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#15
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Me back on the list!
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 131
S/C/G: 220/177/135
Height: 5'5"
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I have found, too, that, even though I fit into smaller sizes, I'm still wearing the bigger sizes. In fact, I just went & changed because I felt the outfit was too tight. Some day, I will figure out how to get my brain out of my body's way!
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