Weight Loss Support - Really? I don't want it!!




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KYgirlinSC
02-18-2014, 07:18 AM
******RANT******
I am really trying to limit the amount of sweets that I am eating....I have learned the hard way that I can't have them in the house or I will eat them! It doesn't matter on portion control! Why in the h@!l is my dear husband pushing on getting them in the house? He doesn't eat them...I do! He does have faith in me not to eat them all....but like I said...I will eat them all! There fore...I can't have any in the house! I tried to have them in the house but only eat a small portion...but that turned into a nightly thing...I don't want that anymore!!
On top of that...at my work they always have bad stuff in the workplace--candy, cake, cookies and even donuts...so far...I have managed to stay away...but it's hard! :(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(


KatMarie
02-18-2014, 07:42 AM
I hear ya!! I don't think I will ever be able to have sweets in the house. It's not like it used to be, where I'd dream about sweets and crave them and obsess. But if they're in the house, they will end up in my belly lol. Hubby used to do that to me, too. He knows sweets used to make me happy, so in his mind he's just trying to make me happy. I had to have a sit down talk with him and tell him it was just stressing me out and making me extremely unhappy. I've changed...took him a bit to get used to it. Hang in there and keep the sweets out of the house!

Wannabeskinny
02-18-2014, 08:20 AM
You'll have to have a very straightforward conversation with your husband. But be very careful not to talk about your feelings because that's not what this is about. Men like straightforward conversations, they don't like to be accused of hurting our feelings or of having alterior motives haha.

So just say "honey, you don't eat sweets, and I don't eat sweets. Let's save some money and not buy any sweets. If they're there, I eat them and then I gain weight. So if you bring them in the house I'll have no choice but to spray them down with bleach and throw them in the garbage. Deal?"

About the sweets at work - make sure you have an apple and some almonds with you to reach for when someone's offering you a donut. And put your focus off of the sweets. Pay attention to the skinny girl (I know she's there) that doesn't seem phased at ALL by the donuts. See? She couldn't care less, she's cool as a cucumber and probably snacking on cucumbers lol. Be her.


LovesToTravel
02-18-2014, 08:52 AM
Oh gosh, I can related KYgirlinSC. Sweets are my big temptation too and sometimes my husband brings them into the house, which ticks me off because he's not a big sweets person to begin with so I end up drooling over them.

And the office? Ugh. Mine is the same, an endless parade of doughnuts, cupcakes, cookies, candy, etc. Over the past 6 months I've made it a habit to stop perusing the snack table and generally think of it as "food that's not mine." I bring my own low cal sweet treats instead.

Have you tried framing it to your husband as a way to support you? My husband got more on board with my efforts when I told him I could really use his support, then laid it out clearly what I wanted him to do or not to do. He still sometimes brings sweets home with the intention of treating me to something nice, but it's not nearly as frequent now and I can handle it better.

Sassyblonde
02-19-2014, 02:39 AM
It is frustrating when sometimes others bring food that is clearly not for them but for you. I have a coworker who knows that I love gummy bears (I had told her once that I ate a whole bag at one time ) so I have lost a fair amount of weight and out of the blue she brings me gummy bears saying I know how you love them. Then another bag for Christmas. I smiled and poured them right into the garbage both times. Now there is a huge tub of cookies in the break room someone dropped off although they look pretty tasteless so no worries there. I used to kind of snicker at that old adage "nothing tastes as good as being thin feels" probably because I was never this close to my goal. Now I truly believe that.

hhm6
02-19-2014, 02:51 AM
Ugh I have a cousin who ALWAYS brings over candy when the holiday clearance happens, she buys them to make treats but never uses them up and brings them over and I end up eating them! I also have a problem with throwing stuff away. I always think throwing away any food (even complete garbage) =throwing $$$ but in reality it's stuff I don't need to be eating!!

Wannabeskinny
02-19-2014, 08:21 AM
Ugh I have a cousin who ALWAYS brings over candy when the holiday clearance happens, she buys them to make treats but never uses them up and brings them over and I end up eating them! I also have a problem with throwing stuff away. I always think throwing away any food (even complete garbage) =throwing $$$ but in reality it's stuff I don't need to be eating!!

Omg my inlaws are like that. Last week they brought 2 dozen brownies that were each 5x5 inches big and 2 inches tall. I mean seriously?? My husband eats no sweets at all and they know that. I threw them all out. 2 dozen!!! Just for me! If that's not a "here you go, gain some more weight" nudge then I don't know what is. Or they'll give us like half a cake or something. It's absurd.

crispin
02-19-2014, 10:53 AM
You'll have to have a very straightforward conversation with your husband. But be very careful not to talk about your feelings because that's not what this is about. Men like straightforward conversations, they don't like to be accused of hurting our feelings or of having alterior motives haha.


I completely agree with this! I also think that people pushing junk food on us are, for the most part, doing it from a place of love. Yeah, some people are saboteurs, but I think most are doing it because they think we'll enjoy eating these foods and they want to make us happy.

I understand though how it can come across as a lack of support at best and controlling disrespect at worst, but I think a straightforward convo giving the other person the benefit of the doubt would solve it in most cases.

Back when I was losing, I would sometimes get those same dark feelings when people gave me junky foods I love. Now that I'm in maintenance, when people give me those same foods, those thoughts don't even enter my mind. I think they're just trying to be nice and they're doing it in a way that makes sense to them, even if it's not the best way for me.

Slashnl
02-19-2014, 11:59 AM
It is so hard when the food is right there in front of you! The food at the office is one thing I've been able to avoid. If you really think about it, when the food is uncovered and not individually wrapped, how many hands have touched it? I watched a coworker look through a bag of bagels, trying to find the right one. She touched them all! I'm not saying she is unclean, but who knows who she just shook hands with or what if she just sneezed or something? Yuck! That has helped me a lot with the office treats. You just never know who has been there before you!

TamTam
02-19-2014, 04:51 PM
I have some friends who are Food Pushers! One came by today and wanted to know if I wanted some fried fish from the grocery store (in the same parking lot as my business) and I told her No, thank you I have my lunch. And she kept on by telling me yea you want it and you know how good it is and I just stood my ground and said that I had my lunch and wanted my scale and blood sugar to continue to get better (now she also is a diabetic) and she eventually backed off and said well I won't force you and I said I am twice your size you can't force me! But it is hard when you live with a food pusher at least my friend comes and goes but she in not in my face everyday trying to get me to go off my eating plan.

Pattience
02-19-2014, 05:11 PM
It is also easier to avoid the cakes and crap at work if you are not hungry. So make sure you don't get hungry at work by having plenty of fruit to eat and a decent lunch.

And would it be so terrible to float the idea of having that stuff less often in the work place. You might find there are others who secretly wish for the same thing.

I trust by now you've said to your hubby what wannabe suggested because that sounded really good to me.

KYgirlinSC
02-19-2014, 06:03 PM
My Hubby is getting better! He knew I wanted something sweet last night...and said are you sure you want that? I know you are trying to cut back on sweets! :carrot::carrot::carrot::carrot: So I guess he is listening! YAY! As for work, the big issue is a lot of the stuff is candy, so wrapped individually. Today was a bad day...and man...I would love a piece of candy...BUT I did NOT have a piece...so I guess that I am doing good on it!:carrot::carrot::carrot::carrot:

TamTam
02-19-2014, 06:09 PM
My Hubby is getting better! He knew I wanted something sweet last night...and said are you sure you want that? I know you are trying to cut back on sweets! :carrot::carrot::carrot::carrot: So I guess he is listening! YAY! As for work, the big issue is a lot of the stuff is candy, so wrapped individually. Today was a bad day...and man...I would love a piece of candy...BUT I did NOT have a piece...so I guess that I am doing good on it!:carrot::carrot::carrot::carrot:

Good for you for staying away from the candy! :bravo:

Bellamack
02-19-2014, 06:51 PM
I hear ya!! I don't think I will ever be able to have sweets in the house. It's not like it used to be, where I'd dream about sweets and crave them and obsess. But if they're in the house, they will end up in my belly lol. Hubby used to do that to me, too. He knows sweets used to make me happy, so in his mind he's just trying to make me happy. I had to have a sit down talk with him and tell him it was just stressing me out and making me extremely unhappy. I've changed...took him a bit to get used to it. Hang in there and keep the sweets out of the house!

WOW, you have lost alot of weight, Congrats to you!

novangel
02-19-2014, 09:26 PM
Another reason I don't miss my old job; if the sky was blue they would all arrange to bring in an entire table of crap. I got so sick of it.