100 lb. Club - I want to stay fat because...




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CharityMarie
01-19-2014, 05:52 PM
I always found these types of threads very funny, painfully true, and motivational. So I hope nobody minds me making a new one here! (These are all meant to be sarcastic, hopefully everyone gets that! haha)


I want to stay fat because...

- It's like a hidden mystery going to a restaurant and wondering if I'll fit into the booths.

- Shopping in the plus section for clothes is wonderful. Having a 'plus' on something is good, right? An A+ in school was better than a regular A. So why can't that be true for clothes shopping!

- I like the danger and risk of not being able to fully see my legs when I'm shaving them.

- It's fun to see how many amusement park rides I have to get off of because I'm too big. I like getting a new high score each time I go.

- Having energy is overrated. It's way better to do absolutely nothing when you get off work because you're too tired than to go out and live life.

- I get to improve my poker face everytime I get a new ID at the dmv. It's fun to see how much lower I can say my weight is and get away with it.


MissMollyM
01-20-2014, 02:05 PM
LOL!!! Too funny!!! :)

lotsakids
01-20-2014, 05:45 PM
I want to stay fat because mentally mapping out every room to make sure I can get across without having to ask someone to move is so much fun.

I want to stay fat because it is my own cloaking device making me invisible to the world. Not gonna lie, kind of makes me a super hero...


Mulse
01-20-2014, 07:18 PM
...it's so much fun to wonder if the person sitting next to you on a plane will roll their eyes when they see you.

....wondering if you're going to need to ask for a seat belt extender.

Kat117
01-21-2014, 11:57 AM
I want to stay fat because I prefer to be the BFF to all my guy friends instead of a girlfriend. Who needs love anyway?

CharityMarie
01-22-2014, 01:38 AM
I want to stay fat so I can make my skinny female friends look better by standing next to me!

Kat117
01-22-2014, 10:47 AM
I want to stay fat because I love having sweat in between all my rolls, and when I try to pull up my Spanx and jump up and down, my boobs start applauding by themselves.

I want to stay fat because I love when I go to a new doctor and get to see their complete disbelief when I tell them that no, I am not diabetic, no I don't have high blood pressure and my cholesterol levels are better than theirs... I'm just FAT.

Oh - and I love being fat because I like wearing bras that are close to to the equivalent of a steel belted radial tire and seeing your feet is completely overrated.

WGnMO
01-22-2014, 12:00 PM
I want to stay fat because breaking a sweat by getting dried off from the shower, getting dressed, doing my hair & getting out the door to work really IS the ultimate workout. Who needs aerobics!?!

I want to stay fat because after getting to work (see above workout routine) I enjoy telling people that it's because I'm in my late 40's that I'm fanning and sweating! Hooray for menopause(or a close facsimile thereof)!

ubercast
01-24-2014, 09:13 AM
I want to stay fat because I like making skinny people feel better about themselves when they look at me!