Weight Loss Surgery - WLS Chat.....Week of July 7th

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07-07-2003, 08:11 AM
Good Morning all. Had an enjoyable week visiting family last week, but it is good to be back to my normal routine.

I'm off for my walk, back later.

07-07-2003, 11:26 AM
:wave: Gotta tell the whole world!
I'm finally in ONEderland!

07-07-2003, 11:34 AM

07-07-2003, 01:19 PM
:dancer: :dancer: for Ruthie!! ONEderland......how wonderful!!

Off to the second :rolleyes: grocery store.....back later.

07-07-2003, 02:10 PM
WoooHOOOOOOOOOO ONEderlandddddd!!!! :cb:

I am waiting for the day I hit the TWOsomes! :D (which should be soon)

peach pit
07-07-2003, 05:57 PM
:bravo: :hat: :dance: WAY TO GO RUTH!!!!!!!!
that 's terrific!!!

Hey Leens!!!! Hey Lori!!!! and Hey hey Debkay!!!...glad your trip went well.

All the boys were out today. yeeeehawwww. Dh and the big kid are at football camp and the little guy started his summer program. Ran errands with mom, bought hair dye and other girlie type things!!!

Barb, Ruthie got the date right...August 11th!!

gotta scoot!


07-08-2003, 03:22 PM
Hi! Sorry its been so long!

John and I have been very busy doing yard work. All the things he has not been able to do the last few years! He has lost around 70 lbs. but the really unbelievable part is 14 inches lost from his waist!

We had a long discussion last night about a co-worker of his who just returned from weight-loss surgery. She had a heck of a time finding someone willing to do her surgery due to a bunch of complications she had from birth, i.e. cerebral palsy and a facial deformity.

BUT here is the kicker! She is 3 weeks out and is already eating Personal Pan Pizza's! She is totally reverted back to all of her old ways. Eating things she knows will make her sick, just waiting a half hour, then eating them again?!

I am floored by this. She called us on the phone after John's surgery and she just wanted this so bad! She was VERY scared to go through the surgery, but knew that this was her one hope for a "normal" size and healthy future.

She has also refused to wear the girdle to protect her incision?! She stated that it was uncomfortable. She does not like the protein shakes so she will not drink or eat any of the shakes or bars and she does not like the taste of chewable vitamins so again she is refusing to take them. Plus she said they upset her stomach (like the Pizza didn’t?!).

John has tried to talk to her, but he said that she just rolled her eyes at him and said, “I’m losing weight my way”!

My question is, how can you help someone like this? I do not want to judge her or make her feel bad, but my gosh! John could not even eat “real” food at this point and here she is downing Greasy Pizza?! She told John she was eating Chicken Pop Pies less than a week after surgery?! This is just dangerous, being sick on that newly healed stomach. I am actually really worried for her. Any suggestions?


07-08-2003, 03:49 PM
luna... i'm sitting here eating my lunch and reading your post [lunch = lamb chop and a lovely spinach and leaf lettuce salad with chick peas, shredded carrots and cheese [a little], and low fat blue cheese dressing] and it's very sad.

but first. i really do wish you'd post more often... i miss reading about you and john!!!!

as for this woman... she needs professional help. psychologist. psychiatrist. eating disorder specialist. there's little you can do for her, beyond being supportive of change and non-supportive of pizza! she needs to figure out why she went through all this preparation and surgery and now is doing everything possible to sabotage it. and she;s really going to extremes here.

this surgery gives us a chance to be healthy, but we have to do the work as well. and frankly, it's not that much different from anyone else following a way of eating!

as for the vitamins, she doesn't have to take chewables. one a days are tiny. and as for upsetting her stomach, well, you pegged that as an excuse. she's setting herself up to be a statistic very very quickly: a wheelchair-bound victim who blames the surgery for her woes rather than her own lack of interest in taking care of herself.

i wish i could be more helpful. but john can be a shining example. and i'm sure that she could attend a support group if she really wanted to.

keep us posted on all fronts....

07-08-2003, 07:04 PM
Just had to share this news with all of you.
I found out today that in our new insurance year (oct), our insurance will start covering the surgery! Since I've already had the initial "move" on every thing, I think that I would be able to
to a LAP just to get restapled...I'm so hopeful on this...knowing now what I didn't know twenty two years ago, I can succeed this time...Keep you fingers and toes crossed that this will be a go.
I will keep you posted on the progress...


07-08-2003, 07:26 PM
Diane, Jiff said it all, not much you can do for this woman. I hope she seeks help and is able to get herself on the right track.

BOB, good news for you! Hope you can get the approval and get a revision (at least I think that is what they are called.) Have you found a surgeon yet?

Hey hey hey peachie! :D Are you ready? Does it seem real to you yet that soon you will be a post-op?

Wanted to share......while visiting our relatives in northern VA, the day we arrived, a 40th birthday party was going on for my cousin. All the relatives were there and my Grandma (who saw me in December) didn't recognize me. She looked right through me and I had to bend down and say "Grandma, it's me!" And she is not senile!! I guess I look a little different than I did in December, but I didn't think that much. I must say......warning brag alert :D......I did look cute in my little black skirt!! :dancer: :lol:

07-09-2003, 02:42 PM
No surgeon yet, I'm waiting to see who will be doing them at my hospital. There is one guy who used to do them when he was
in med school, but that's a long time ago...he's always told me that if he ever did anything thorasic on me that he would throw in the restaple for free!
Keep you fingers crossed.

07-09-2003, 02:46 PM
bob... i can't begin to tell you how excited and happy i am for you!!!!! this is really wonderful news...

and now, one of your posts mentioned that you know a lot of stuff you didn't know 20 years ago... care to share???

and debkay.. you skinny little goddess!!!! you must have looked fabulous!

will try to post more later.

07-09-2003, 06:36 PM
Hi Everyone,

Luna It sounds like that woman has troubles that go way beyond weight. I wonder if she had to go through a psychiatric evaluation before surgery. Either she said what they wanted to hear or was fooling herself. It certainly makes me take a hard look at myself as I consider this.

Ruth Way to go! You must feel positively lithe!

Guess what? Kaiser finally sent me the new, improved(?) WLS info packet and questionnaire. I'm worried that they won't accept me as a candidate because I'm not sure if I have enough weight-related complications. I'm certainly fat enough, but might be too healthy. I'm going to try my hardest though and my PCP said she would help me too. If anyone has any great suggestions to make them accept me, please post and let me know. They do warn in the booklet that the process can take up to two years. The other thing that bothered me is that they only do open surgery. No lap whatsoever - by general surgeons, not gastric specialists. Would that stop any of you from persuing this? I'm still learning so much about all this and thought that laproscopic sounded like the way to go, but that's based on my limited reading.

My life has been a freakin' soap opera lately and I'm glad it's finally settling down. Like sands through the hourglass, these are the days of my life:
*Someone ran over my dog on June 29. She's okay now, but it was scary because only the kids were home and the driver didn't even stop. We were coming back from South Dakota and were hoping the kids could deal with everything.
*June 30, my knee went ballistic and I couldn't walk for a couple of days. It still hurts - poor me!
*On July 2 my son turned 18.
*On July 3 one of the pitchers on the softball team I coach got hit in the eye by a ball and had to go to the emergency room for a concussion and possible fracture.
*On July 4 the newly 18 year old son was in an accident that totalled the car we just bought him. Thank God he and his girlfriend are both okay, but they had a fun-filled ride to the hospital via ambulance. They had to use the jaws of life to get him out. He was just an innocent driver and the accident wasn't his fault. He's going back to the doctor because he's in a lot of pain where the seatbelt was. He has bruises and blisters where the seat belt gave him a rope-like burn.

I need a break and anyone who read this long post probably does too!

Thanks for letting me vent,

peach pit
07-09-2003, 08:48 PM
Chickster, you should come to new jersey
cause your life is too topsy and turvy
we got surgeons who lap
and baseball is crap
and then you would be svelte and curvy

07-09-2003, 10:17 PM
Quick update ... I have passed -100 lbs!!! I am currently 219 and now .. I am trying ever so passionately to make it to ONEderland. That is my next goal.

Here is the kicker ... I went shopping for a bathing suit and bought a size 16 ... OMGAWD. It actually fits and looks decent. This is the first time in a long time that I went to one of my sister's pool parties and played in the pool. I even played a rousing game of POOL volleyball ... where the women kicked ***!

I am having a wonderful life ... doing all of the things I used to do and more! I have started dating again ... and men are coming out of the woodwork ? ? ? When did this happen ?

Thanks all for your support!

07-10-2003, 01:23 AM
chickadee dee.... open vs lap... i'd do either. but by a general surgeon who's not asbs-certified??????? i'd really think twice about it. no. that's not true. i'd immediately call those kaiserites and raise bloody ****... and write a letter to the state's commissioner of insurance complaining that kaiser's policy do not meet industry and medical standards of care for bariatric surgery.

and then,. i'd come to joisy. i can't put the invitation as eloquently as peachie did, but i can sure agree!!!!

07-10-2003, 07:51 AM
Hey I am doing a drive by posting this morning! I wanted to tell everyone Hi :wave:

I am on my way to the hospital to have my thyroid scanned! They are pretty sure I have HYperthroid. But I am just one of the people that do not lose weight with it. Go figure:?:

I hope every one is doing ok! I have to run.

Oh for those that wanted to see pictures of me I have some up on obesity help! I cant remember if i have posted this before (I have the worst case of CRS)!


Have a great day!!!


07-10-2003, 08:35 AM
Leanna :dancer: :dancer: happy dance for you!! And dating to boot!

chickadee......yep, I would do open or lap, but again our Jiff is correct........a general surgeon........I don't think so!!

and chickadee........I know about kids and car accidents, sorry your child had one, but glad he is okay. My son had an accident yesterday, he is also okay, thank goodness!! A lady pulled out of a Ford Dealership, crossed over FOUR lanes of traffic and hit him, pushing him into oncoming traffic (thank God it was clear) he went up and over a curb and did extensive damage to his (new to him Honda Accord) I'm sure this will turn into a nightmare......hubby will contact her insurance company today to see what they want to do.

peachie your such a poet!!!

Jiff, aren't you a member of a support group strictly for post-ops? How is it run? Do you like it? Hazel and I and a couple other's are thinking about starting a support group for post-ops, our WINGS around Atlanta support group is great, but we need a little more for post-ops. Any hints??

Hope you all have a wonderful day

07-10-2003, 02:40 PM
You KNOW it's been a good week when:

1. Your rent rebate check comes in the mail. :D

2. You lose an inch off your hips (of all places!) and didn't even expect it :cp:

3. Not only do your cat brats let you sleep in for a change, the house is actually INTACT when you do get up! :lol:

4. You get a call from db that his parents want to meet you (I don't know if that is good or not, though). :fr:

5. Today is a balmy 72 degrees and I was able to both weed the flower garden and get in a walk. Tigger has not dragged back any dead birds....YET.

Oy vey...it is now July 10, 39 days and counting to the big consultation appointment in Pittsburgh. Supringly, I am not nervous at all. I guess doing research on WLS and being here on the boards helped a great deal in getting prepared. My goal at the moment is to break 300 even by the time my consultation appointment day rolls around; heck, that shouldn't be too difficult.....I've kicked most of my bad habits as it is :D

07-10-2003, 04:21 PM
Hi Ladies,

Its so nice to see such a cheery thread. I'm so incrediably happy for all of you.

Lori and Peach GOOD LUCK !!!

Leanna, CONGRATS on your weight loss, thats so wonderful. I can't wait to hit onederland again. I maintained there for such a long time and its where I wanna be again. But I've got a long way to go, and this time I know I'll make.

Hazel, Chick, Jiffy, BOB, Diane, Deb Hugs to all of you !!


07-10-2003, 04:28 PM
So Peach,

If I made my way to New Joisey,
(where the baseball fans are too noisy)
Could we both get the lap
and be done with this crap?
Then cruise around for cute boy-sies?

By the way, sweet and juicy one, you are the bomb (as my DD would say)!

Leanna and Loranden- It makes me happy just reading your posts. I'm so happy for both of you.

Deb - I'm sorry your son was in an accident too. The accidents are surprisingly similar. Insurance companies are so fun to work with. I look forward to my interactions with them - NOT!
I appreciate your comments and Jif's about the General surgeon. That's pretty much what I thought too. Thanks for the suggestions Jif. I hadn't thought of calling the insurance commissioner. I'm also concerned about the care after surgery. It doesn't seem to me that there is enough support. I may change insurance companies in December, but from what I read on obesity help, my other choice isn't that great either. I hope this isn't just a pipe dream.

Have a great day ladies. I really have to go and get some work done!


07-10-2003, 07:14 PM

What I mean by my statement.....

No support
No teaching
Thrown into the lion's den with a list of eats
How to avoid throwing up
water consumption

In other words, I didn't know anything...I didn't know to teach myself that this was a whole new way to eat...all I could think of was how to get around giving up everything that I loved before...
LIKE: Learning to eat pizza and drink beer without loosing it...this was the culprit to the start of my regain...
NO EXERCISE...I didn't have to..it melted off
No one told me to take my vitamins....
I could go on and on....

I know about portion control
What not to eat
SUPPORT is EVERYWHERE ....just use it!

I'm so looking forward to this and will find out the who what when and where next week at our benefit fair....
I'll keep you posted...


07-11-2003, 12:56 AM
bob... i sure wish we could bottle that last post of yours and hit john's coworker over the head with it!!!!! when you had the surgery originally, it was surely, as you described it, being thrown into the lion's den...

and deb... funny you should ask about post op support groups and how they're run. it seems as if it's a wide open field right now.. i was asked tonight to run it!!!!

talk about going from the frying pan into the fire!!!!! suggestions? hmmmm. i've been thinking a lot about this. the post op support groups, when everyone's all bunched together, tend to be all focused on the newbies, and throwing up, getting water, vitamins, protein in. that's all valuable, but it only helps them over the short term and helps almost no one after the first couple of months.

so, i was thinking about how to address their needs and the needs of farther-out post ops. this is where i was going [please please please jump in... we need to brainstorm this stuff!!!!!!!]:

we need to focus on identifying issues and deciding how to cope with them. things like basic food water vitamins. but also image changes. emotions. it doesn' t much matter what the issue is, but rather how we identify it and resolve it so that we can lose the weight and keep it off.

so instead of a moderator who tells his/her story, and then opens up to questions, i'm thinking of posing questions and getting answers... maybe writing on a flip chart or white board.

and maybe starting with: why did you decide on the surgery? and then move to what did you expect afterwards? how is it different? how can you cope? and then see what happens.

what do you think???? HELP!!!!!!!! I might have as long as 2 weeks to pull something together!!!!

07-11-2003, 08:18 AM
Jiff, is there any way you can pose those questions ahead of time to your participants? I've taught many a course where questions have been met with glazed over eyes. Those were for techie questions. When dealing with feelings, folks might need a wee bit of advance thinking time.

Just a suggestion from an old broad who has been there in front of a group who looked dead! (Mainly male executive types, however, who hated the thought of a skirt telling them stuff!)

07-11-2003, 11:19 AM
Jiff, how about discussing how to deal with people trying to feed you?

This is one of the things John has had to learn to deal with, even as he is losing weight, the ladies at work keep trying to push food on him! It is even sometimes hard for me. When I was done with my food I always offered him what was left.

I guess it could sort of be a "how to live" now that you can eat real food, how to make good choices at a restaurant, i.e. Just say NO to the bread basket! and other things like that.

Or the emotional issues of losing a large amount of weight? Just thinking of my own personal experiences with John here but my 8 year old daughter had a “talk” with her dad last week about not wanting a skinny dad! We have always discussed weight issues as being too large, too skinny and being a healthy weight. I had to reassure her that her dad was not getting too skinny! LOL! But he was trying to be a healthy weight so he would be with us for a long time.

Just my .02!


07-11-2003, 06:29 PM
I agree on the long term discussion....My Uncle actually told me after I lost 123lbs that I looked sick...and in my mind, that's all it took to TRY and gain some weight.....well....here I am....and I did figure out how to gain it back....AND BELIEVE ME....THAT'S SAD!!!
People have NO IDEA what they are in for...once all the weight is gone, some people have NOTHING left to focus on...just knowing that someone is out there struggling with the same things would help....

07-11-2003, 07:33 PM
I just wanted to stop in and say that my sisters surgery date got bumped up and she will now have surgery on sept. 3, 2003. She hasnt really excepted its finally here! Wish us luck!

07-11-2003, 08:33 PM
Julie good luck to your sister. Has she posted with us?? Sorry, I'm over 40 I can't remember anything :rolleyes:

Been in here a couple times today, reading the suggestions about support groups. just didn't post.

I like the idea of having the discussion topics known in advance, of course with room to discuss things that come up. Our support group has an email support group also, so that is one way to get the word out on discussion topics.

I don't know if any of ya'lls support groups do this, but I think one of the most important parts of our support group is the introdutions. We each tell, name, date of surgery (in my case 3 dates :lol:) insurance company, doctor's name and pounds lost. We try to move it along quickly, but it can get bogged down, as we have grown it takes longer and longer. Currently, some also throw out discussion topics at that time.

Hazel and I attended a new (to us) support group last night and there was a woman there, longer term post op (4 years.) Who.......WOULD NOT SHUT UP!!! The leader, not a wls patient, but very informed on wls, just let her go and from what I understand from other's there, it's very common for this to happen. I think we all want to talk, but some just can't shut up! She was the only negative of the meeting.

07-12-2003, 11:03 AM
No she hasnt posted but i did a little while ago asking for ideas on how to best support her before and after surgery. Her original surgery date was for the end of october and they bumped her up to the beginning of september. I cannot wait for her to start feeling better.

07-12-2003, 03:46 PM
Just thought I would drop in on this sunny Saturday and say HI :wave: !

OK, I am now officially over the "meet the parents" anxiety for sure as of today--I talked to Bri's mother earlier this afternoon on the phone. Turns out the family had an eventful morning out there when a couple of troublemakers started in on his little brother and Brian went off like a rocket. Much as this little squirt loves kids, mess with his kid brother and the wrath of God comes unleashed. Anyway, I didn't get all the details of what transpired, but it must of been dandy, because Zack came on the phone and said something that really cracked me up so hard I had tears down my cheeks: " "Dude! Ewan McGregor and Kurt Cobain's love child just kicked someone's :censored:!" (I would presume from that that "someone" won't be messing with Zack anymore :lol: ) Even their poor mother, bless her heart, about peed her pants!

Doris is a joy. I told her about Tigger and the dead bird and read her the cat commandments and practically had her on the floor laughing. Turns out they too have a cat and Mr Belvedere also has a habit of leaving dead "presents" on the front porch every morning. Guess that explains why Tigger liked Brian so much, and Tigger is not one to usually warm up to males--human nor animal.

Oh yes, and I just had the most delightful lunch--watermelon and cantelope salad with cottage cheese..ummmm. I love summer fruit :love:

07-12-2003, 10:07 PM
The one support group ole Alvn & I went to use a panel of post-op patients. There were four panel members and they were all four in differnt spots of their journey, from a newbie to one who had already recovered from the skin graphs and was tiny!! They gave topic for the night in advance (I think the one we went to was on self esteem and the changes you go through)
The moderator gave the audience time to WRITE out their questions, the she would choose the ones that seemed to partain to the subject most and ask the question to each of the panel members. It was very intresting to hear the different answers from the different spots. You might want to try something like that.

Repairman's Wife
07-16-2003, 03:41 PM
Oh Peach your such a POET! :) MB

10-08-2003, 01:32 AM