Overeaters Anonymous - Secret OverEating
This is my first post, to any type of blog.
I currently a senior in high school. I play sports, I have friends, and I know where I am going to school next year. However, I can't help but feel sad sometimes. I am clearly the biggest girl in my friend group. While i love my friend to death, I can't talk to them about how i feel. Every other day I will hear "ugh I am so fat to day." I just scoff and turn my head. They don't know
that sometimes when I drive home I stop at wendy's, get a burger and fries, throw away the evidence, then go home and eat another dinner.
I have often tried to limit my eating. I will go a day where I have a three balanced meals, but then next day stop at the grocery store for a pint of ice cream and a bag of cheetos. We have vending machines at school, and I wont go if anyone else is around. But when i do go, I get like 6 or 7 things, and immediately hide them in my bag to eat in private. I can't stop myself.
I need to start somewhere. I dont know where but I know I need to.
Sometimes I will feel really motivated and be like okay, I can do this. Other times I truly feel like trying to start would be pointless. I have had points where I make myself sick I have eaten so much.
I will be going to college soon and I can't help but stress out that my out of control eating will completely balloon.
12-09-2013, 07:10 PM
My heart goes out to you and I can relate to what you're going through...I have a similar issue, although not the same exact one. Ideally, you could try to talk to a professional, but that's not always an option. Try to make small changes. Start slow and build on your success. It can be something like just drinking water instead of soda/juice or avoiding artificial sweeteners. You can try to do that for a few weeks. Then, when you're ready, you can add exercise. Get a cheap pedometer and try to increase your steps with the ultimate goal of reaching 10,000 steps a day. Just make small changes you can live with. If you slip, just get right back on as soon as possible. I am rooting for you!
12-09-2013, 07:26 PM
I feel for you. TRY one thing at a time - - water instead of soda, no mayonnaise, no French Fries.. SOMETHING to make you feel you are making progress....that will lead to more things and more progress. I know you do sports, but maybe you could add to your exercise?
Be sure to drink water....that was a hard one for me, but it helps.
Good luck and let us know.
12-09-2013, 08:28 PM
I think a lot of eating is done in the sneak way because we are ashamed. You posted in the Overeaters Anonymous forum which is a 12 step area. You may want to post in the general Chicks in Control area.
Trust us -we know about the hiding, the silly chatter with the store clerk about the party you are planning but all the food is for you, the ordering food and pretending to consult a list of requests from the office when it is all for you, the perfecting of silent eating so folks do not know you are dissolving a cookie in your mouth, the clever disposal of wrappers, and on and on. Have courage, do not despair, seek change, post at 3FC :)
12-09-2013, 11:18 PM
Another thing I forgot to mention...plan a day of eating in advance. Stick to it like glue. Make a menu and follow through. I need a lot of structure in my eating. i wish I could go with the flow but I can't. In fact, I try to avoid eating out unless I know what the restaurant serves and can plan in advance. Salad with chicken or fish on top is usually a good choice (dressing on side so I can dip my fork in it).
I also think that exercise helps to release stress as well as endorphins.
Finally (I promise), sleep is crucial. If you don't sleep enough that can definitely lead to overeating.
12-10-2013, 11:16 AM
Hi there! Big hugs!!!! Secret eating is a big sign of trouble and a lot of us have dealt with it.
You said you eat three meals a day ... but as a snacker you may need more ... maybe even six. So three big meals and three healthy snacks. Try bringing an apple and an energy bar to school, one for the morning, one for lunch. When you feel the urge to go to the vending machine, eat one of your healthy snacks instead. See if that helps.
And don't go to the grocery store alone for now. I used to have to take my husband with me every time I went, because otherwise I would be sneaking crap into the basket, ha ha. Now when I go I reinforce my good choices by looking over what I am buying and feeling pride in how healthy it is.
Good luck! You can do this!!!!
12-10-2013, 11:39 AM
I am right where you are. Though I am a bit older then you. I used to stop every few days at a fast food place to get food and eat it then come home to eat dinner. Once I even went to a pizza joint and got a pizza for myself. Now I don't do those things at all I started slow.
Bringing my stopping at fast foods down to twice a week then once. And finally I stopped. I still overeat. but its a lot less then when I first started. And I've dropped 13lbs so far. Just from stopping all that extra eating.
I feel ya. I have always been the biggest one in my group of friends pretty much the biggest person in the room where ever I go. If you ever need to talk everyone here at 3FC will always be here. We are like a family here!
You got this. I did the fast food on the way home followed by a dinner as well. And the eating in secret.
Just start small. Eat less and use the scale to motivate you to make bigger changes. You are a tall girl, so you will carry weight better. Remember that.
So good luck! And stay strong.
12-10-2013, 12:19 PM
I definitely empathize. :hug: Two things that helped me with these behaviors - I stopped carrying any money at all. Zip, nada, nil. I also changed my route home from work to avoid going past fast food row. I packed sufficient foods for my day and I had no choice but to eat those foods.
I felt deprived and rebellious for a couple of weeks and then this became my new behavior. I lost 38 pounds in 6 months doing nothing but this.
You can do this! It's all about commitment. How much do you want it?
12-10-2013, 07:07 PM
I hear what you are saying because I have been there and done that. I am in OA and I find it very helpful. I am going to get a food plan/plan of eating to give me a guide for my eating but that only works if it's used. It sounds like your eating is emotional. Have you thought of talking with someone you can confide in about what you are going through or maybe counseling? Meeting with a nutritionist can be very helpful too. Try to be aware of what you are doing, it seems that you are and that is the first step. Now try to replace that overeating with healthy things such as going for a walk, reading, exercising, journaling, etc.