Weight Loss Support - That's a BIG lunch!




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Amy Remixed
07-30-2013, 06:56 PM
At lunch time I went to Trader Joe's and picked up an Asian Crunchy Slaw (~350 calories since I leave out the crispy noodles and over half the dressing) and a diet ginger ale. That was my lunch. I also picked up some veggies, a yogurt dip, baked snack peas, and a liter of milk to keep at the office for the rest of the week and beyond. The cashier (early 20s, skinny female) looked at my items in the basket and looked at me and exclaimed, "Wow! That's a BIG lunch!" I looked at her with a confused expression and said, "What?" She repeated herself. "That's a BIG lunch!" I said, "That's lunch plus items to keep in the office fridge for the week." I thought about questioning her about her comment but I didn't want to come across as the angry fat chick. I paid and left... with a furrowed brow.

What the heck was that? Poor bantering skills? A dig at my size?


Mori M
07-30-2013, 07:25 PM
I'm guessing "a dig at your size". It was none of her business what you brought and pretty shitty to assume you'd eat all of that in one sitting (even if you were to eat all of that for one meal, it's still none of her business).Fat shamers are always "brave" about giving in their 2 cents where it's not needed.

Desiderata
07-30-2013, 07:29 PM
I think TJ's cashiers are encouraged to be talkative. I have had some really odd and awkward conversations. :lol: Woe be the cashier who tries to banter with me on a bad health day -- all my energy at that point has gone to actually getting to the store, with little left to form coherent sentences. :p

I had one really weird conversation with a young-ish cashier recently who wanted to chat about how excited I must be to be engaged, when was the wedding, etc, while pointing at my wedding ring. ... I've been married for a few years. :lol: I was so confused. It was just a terribly awkward interaction. Actually, now that you have me thinking about it, I've had a TON of awkward/weird chit chat interactions with TJ's cashiers (but not elsewhere). I'll bet it wasn't personal!


newleaf123
07-30-2013, 07:36 PM
I vote for poor bantering skills. I hate this trend towards chit chat at the grocery store. One guy near the bulk bins commented on my green watch and then told me a whole story about a woman who used to always dress in red. Really, I couldn't care less, it went on way too long, and I just wanted to grab my coffee beans and go.

CIELOARGE
07-30-2013, 08:03 PM
I would had said something like "well, it really is none of your business" and give her the look...

gailr42
07-30-2013, 08:32 PM
I think it was probably intended as conversation (banter). The salad gave her the idea that it was all lunch and that's what came out of her mouth. To you and me, your items seem like a small grocery order, not one meal.

dstalksalot
07-30-2013, 08:59 PM
I am a chatty Cathy and love my chit chat with my local TJ cashiers.

I would assume they meant no harm in all situations. Try to not take it personally or ruin an otherwise good day. There is just no way to tell for sure what their intentions were.

nelie
07-30-2013, 09:15 PM
Yes, poor bantering skills. From what I've heard, TJs cashiers are supposed to comment on what you are buying or they get in trouble. I guess maybe she couldn't think what to say or was trying to joke around and did a poor job at it.

Tangible Soul
07-30-2013, 09:49 PM
I agree with the poor bantering skills. Society has this stigma about looks, weight and how we are "suppose" to be to be acceptable. Those of us larger beauties are in one way or another sadly judged by preconceived notions. I say take it with a grain of salt, have a great sense of humor and stay strong in your health goal.:)

Amy Remixed
07-31-2013, 12:41 AM
I'm all for chit chat at Trader Joe's if it's with one of their hot guys. ;) But for this woman to think I'm going to eat $15 worth of groceries for lunch?! Urg. I'll avoid her line next time.

newleaf123
07-31-2013, 09:13 AM
There was a great thread on this from awhile back, before you joined the site. It was so great that I searched it up for you. I just remember it as having a lot of funny comments on a very similar topic.

http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/general-chatter/266188-comments-being-made-my-food-grocery-store.html

Ruthxxx
07-31-2013, 09:22 AM
My Mother always said "Personal remarks are seldom in good taste." Maybe the cashiers should stick to comments about the weather. There was no need for you to explain your purchases.

Wannabeskinny
07-31-2013, 10:21 AM
Tactfulness should be met with tact. If someone told me that I'd say "I don't appreciate personal comments about my purchases" or something else direct like that. The worst thing you can do is walk away without saying anything and letting it make you feel bad. Why should a strange have the capacity to do that?

This reminds me of a time when I went out for sushi with a friend. She ordered 3 rolls for her meal and the waiter said "wow, that's a lot of food." My friend was mortified and speechless but I said "that's none of your business what we order." He apologized but if he hadn't I would have talked to the manager. I mean, they have 3 rolls as a special, it was on the menu lol!

nelie
07-31-2013, 10:38 AM
This reminds me of a time when I went out for sushi with a friend. She ordered 3 rolls for her meal and the waiter said "wow, that's a lot of food." My friend was mortified and speechless but I said "that's none of your business what we order." He apologized but if he hadn't I would have talked to the manager. I mean, they have 3 rolls as a special, it was on the menu lol!

Well I think restaurants are a bit different and they should let you know that you might be over ordering. There could've been a better way to say it but I've had various experiences where I was out with others and we were given a heads up about potentially over ordering and the restaurant was always right.

Pyrrhic
07-31-2013, 10:51 AM
If it's any consolation, the cashier at my grocery store keeps asking my husband if I'm pregnant yet because of the weird combination of food he buys and the fact we once bought a pregnancy test. :lol: I just laugh it off, but I know personally that don't mean any harm by it.

Katydid77
07-31-2013, 12:32 PM
I'm in the service industry myself (and have been for 20 years) and I've dealt with MORE than my share of guest comments/issues b/c some server or associate was trying to be banter or be friendly and it was done without tact or awkwardly.

MOST of the time, it really is just an honest mistake and the reason they felt free to say something that could be taken so wrong, is that they honestly weren't thinking anything along those lines. If she HAD of been thinking negative thoughts in relation to your weight, then she would have had the foresight not to say anything that could have been taken wrong and gotten her in trouble.

Having said that, it even catches me off guard at times too. We were in a restaurant a couple of days ago and the server absolutely got on my nerves so bad. He played that smart aleck thing and would only talk to me at the table and was mildly combative over every request.

I was so mad and annoyed I couldn't see straight and was ready to complain to management. When I was getting good and sick of it, someone at the table made a comment to try and settle my boyfriend down because 'the server kept flirting with his girlfriend'

I was totally shocked and disagreed. But, by the end of the evening I realized they were right. It was embarrassingly apparent when I cooled down a bit and realized it.

So, here the guy thought he was flirting with me and I was so mad I was ready to report him to management. LOL

Wannabeskinny
07-31-2013, 01:30 PM
Well I think restaurants are a bit different and they should let you know that you might be over ordering. There could've been a better way to say it but I've had various experiences where I was out with others and we were given a heads up about potentially over ordering and the restaurant was always right.

This would be true if we were ordering an appetizer and the server informed us that it was especially large and meant for more than 2 people. I went to chilis once and wanted to order this hot fudge volcanoes thing but the sever told me that was meant for sharing. That's fine. However this was a sushi restaurant and even had we never been there before rolls are pretty standard everywhere. And this was a lunch special, 3 rolls with soup and salad. And if the dish was meant for more than one person he should have said that, not "wow, that's a lot of food" which is just a comment, judgmental at best.

Arctic Mama
07-31-2013, 01:34 PM
Life's too short to sweat comments made by strangers. Just take everything in the best possible spirit, assume no motives, and move on with your day. You'll be the happiest for it.

Amy Remixed
07-31-2013, 02:45 PM
Thank you newleaf123 for providing the link to the previous topic. I read through some of the posts. Not all of them because it is lengthy. I figure the TJ cashier just has poor bantering skills.

TJ employees confuse me. There have been times when I can't tell if the male employees are being super nice or being flirty. :D

linJber
07-31-2013, 08:51 PM
I, too, vote for poor bantering skills. However, a comment like "What makes you think all this is my lunch?" might have served 2 purposes - you get to make a witty comeback, and - hopefully - the cashier learns that she / he made a stupid remark.

Lin

HungryHungryHippo
08-01-2013, 12:43 AM
Oooh--aren't those baked snack peas good?! I know what you mean, though--comments like that drive me crazy!

crispin
08-01-2013, 01:03 AM
I've worked in a coffee shop for a long time and before that worked several jobs in retail/food. My jobs really stressed making small talk with the customers. I know that for me, sometimes when I was working my brain would go numb from the tedious day, and my mouth would go on autopilot. I never said anything rude, but I'd sometimes hear myself and think "What the **** is coming out of my mouth? I've never even had these thoughts before yet here I am saying them??" Really banal things that I wasn't even truly thinking, just filling the air.

So imo, the cashier was just trying to grab at something to say for your order and grabbed something really dumb. She may never have even realized how it sounded. I don't think a TJ cashier would be the snarky type. :)

amandie
08-01-2013, 01:31 AM
Life's too short to sweat comments made by strangers. Just take everything in the best possible spirit, assume no motives, and move on with your day. You'll be the happiest for it.

This is really true. I need to try to remember that all the time. Definitely less stress! :)

IanG
08-02-2013, 03:37 PM
I get the big lunch comments all the time because my lunches are big. I go light for breakfast and skip dinner so when I get a salad...it's a big one!

PreciousMissy
08-02-2013, 05:15 PM
Yes, poor bantering skills. From what I've heard, TJs cashiers are supposed to comment on what you are buying or they get in trouble. I guess maybe she couldn't think what to say or was trying to joke around and did a poor job at it.

I am starting to think the same thing for Target employees :lol:

lin43
08-02-2013, 06:22 PM
I would assume they meant no harm in all situations. . . . There is just no way to tell for sure what their intentions were.

I agree. I have noticed that T.J.'s cashiers are chatty, and as others here have noted, they're probably told to be that way. Your particular cashier was just not that skilled at casual banter.

TooWicky
08-02-2013, 07:12 PM
I vote awkward customer service banter as well. Sometimes they try to jazz chit-chat up and vary it so they don't feel as though their job is on repeat, resulting some cringeworthy results.

I have worked in retail part time for years now. My two favorite personal guff-ups include the time when the phone rang and I answered the hand-held price scanner, like, as in put it all the way up to my ear. I have to say my line of customers all busted out laughing so it did lighten the mood at my own expense.

My #1 banter guff up of all time was the time I was helping a gentleman do an exchange on dress pants. I had the most unfortunate word mash up on record when I asked for clarification on whether he desired a short or long length. I asked him, "Do you like sh-longs?" We both froze and acted like it did not happen, lolol, just carrying on with the conversation. I was mortified. I am very professional at work in speech and manner so I hope he realized I died a little inside, amg!!!

crispin
08-03-2013, 08:04 PM
I asked him, "Do you like sh-longs?" We both froze and acted like it did not happen, lolol, just carrying on with the conversation. I was mortified. I am very professional at work in speech and manner so I hope he realized I died a little inside, amg!!!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: That's a classic!

Reminds me of one of my screw ups. I work in a coffee shop and was applying the whip cream to a man's drink. It was the holidays, so a huge crowd was gathered near me, waiting for their drinks.

As I put on the whip cream, the man said, "Mmmm."

In my head, I thought "mmm" would be a better sound to replace the "pfffffff" sound that the can makes when being used.

I didn't explain my line of reasoning though, so right after he said, "Mmm," I said, "That's the perfect sound for when it squirts out." :lol: The crowd all laughed and I probably blushed fire haha.