Weight Loss Support - One moment you realized you were fat?

07-12-2013, 10:10 PM
What's one moment that made you realize you needed to lose weight?

It's dumb, but one that will always stick with me was my grandfather's wife telling me if I constantly suck in my stomach I will look better, and the muscles will tighten so I won't look so pot-bellied.
I think I was 8. Needless to say it messed with my head.

As an adult it was seeing the scale almost make it to 300. I was always between 120-150, got off some meds, then BAM. I had no idea how bad it was until I saw the scale that day.

07-12-2013, 10:33 PM
It's sick, but I think I remember every point:

1. when I was six, my teacher told me to stand behind a line so we could start dodgeball. I stood behind it, and a nasty older girl told me "she meant your gut too!". Don't be too mad at her: I found out later that that nasty girl was actually getting severely abused at home. When she was 17 she had a baby and it was immediately taken away from her. She's been in and out of jail a few times.

2. Speaking with my friends about general weight gain. A typically skinny-from -birth girl said "The second your fat hangs over your jeans, you should realize you're obese". I had always had lovehandles, and at that point I had a muffin top. That girl put on about 60lbs in college.

3. My neighbour was talking on the phone around me, and she was describing me to her son in hopes of setting us up. she said "Now she's a big girl, but she's absolutely beautiful. Yeah.. No no, she's big. Oh okay, I was just thinking.." She and her son ended up on heroin.

and from myself: I often have a double chin in pictures, or if my belly starts to "sag", or I get a crease underneith it. When my thighs touch again (I don't have mall legs, just huge hips, so my legs are EXTRA big)

07-12-2013, 11:34 PM
Flea, I love the humorous way you describe how the karma bus took care of the people who made derogatory comments about your size. Thanks for the chuckle.


07-13-2013, 12:03 AM
Oh God there are many...

Once I was rejected from donating blood because my pulse was too high.

Once I didn't fit on a theme park ride.

My biggest fear traveling internationally was the airline losing my luggage- it's hard enough to buy plus size clothes around here!

Needing the "large" blood pressure cuff

Having to switch go-carts with a friend because the seatbelt was too short on mine

Having to order the largest size the designer made of my wedding dress (and THANK GOD they went just that high- street size 22, wedding dress size 26!)

Telling my husband I didn't want to go on the helicopter ride in Hawaii- what I didn't say was that it's because we'd have to pay extra for me being overweight (he is normal size)

Not being able to rent wetsuits when traveling

Not buying a certain car only because my butt didn't fit in the seat very well!

07-13-2013, 01:26 AM
I was always an overweight kid so there wasn't really a moment from when I was really young that made me realize damn I'm fat. And even though I had 'dieted' pre-High School one of the bigger aha moments was starting grade 9 and having to get school uniforms. My kilt was a size 22. :(

07-13-2013, 01:30 AM
I just woke up one day and was sick and tired of being fat...

07-13-2013, 02:08 AM
i've been fat all my life... so, yeah, i guess i know from the scale and what people (parents included) say and ask me to lose weight since i was in high school... :(

07-13-2013, 02:46 AM
Hmmm, I've had a lot of moments but the one that stands out the most is when a lady at my daughters soccer practice offered me her seat because of my "condition". She thought I was pregnant.

Arctic Mama
07-13-2013, 02:54 AM
I've been heavy for years, but it really hit me in two spots:

When I looked at my wedding photos, and discovered I hated them all (despite the excellent photographer) because I was bloated in every one.

When I bought new clothes only to realize that, even in the correct size, nothing looked good on me. The tops were 3X and I think the jeans were very tight size 22, maybe size 24.

Even thought I'd been heavier than average for years, those moments brought home that I'd gone from acceptably overweight to truly obese.

07-13-2013, 08:33 AM
I was about 5 and a 6 year old girl said to me "you're fat!".

However, I was born fat. 10 lbs and 3 oz babies were nearly unheard of in the 70's. I look at my baby picture and for some reason 90% of the pics are of me having a bottle or some type of toddler food. Mom said she had to give me baby cereal at 2 weeks because formula was not satisfying me. Oy!

I remember once when I was a little girl that Mom took me and my older sister shopping for new dresses. Then Mom cried because I was a size 6x, the fat girl's size.

07-13-2013, 09:19 AM
I remember having a lead part in the fourth grade play, and pretending I didn't know what dress size I wore when the teacher asked if I had anything suitable for a princess.

Any photo from junior high on.

Wearing a size 10 ring in high school! I'm still obese but currently wear a size 7, to give you an idea.

Only able to browse through the plus size sections in junior high and beyond . . . so much ugly fun in the 80's-90's. But not being able to buy much anyway and having to share most clothes with my mother.

My mom once freaking out after realizing we'd accidentally bought me a maternity shirt since it was cute and fit well (I was 12 years old). She ripped out the tag and warned me not to tell anyone.

Crying because the only suitable dress that I could fit into for my junior high graduation was the one I'd wore earlier that year to my brother's funeral.

Not fitting on a theme park ride.

Attempting to squeeze through a very small aisle of a store, when an innocent little kid loudly points out to her mother, "Mommy, that lady's fat!" When I looked over in their direction, the mother gave the kid a harsh shushing and was careful to direct her eyes away from me.

Realizing that not even the plus sized shop had jeans big enough to fit me.

07-13-2013, 09:35 AM
- When the inside thigh part of my jeans started to wear out because of all the rubbing together

- When I had to suck in my stomach so that the seat belt on an airplane would fit me... a little fatter and that one wouldn't have fit me at all.

- When I started seeing my double chin in every single photo, no matter how much I tried to hide it

07-13-2013, 11:11 AM
I too have been fat ALL my life. I remember my gym teacher making fun of me because I couldn't climb a rope or do the pommel horse, etc... All the kids laughed and I used to be sick on gym days. Unfortunately I guess my mom didn't realize just how bad it was for me and kept sending me. Oh well there are so many more times in school over the years.
Now in my 50's I no longer care what anyone thinks but myself. I am doing it this time for me.

Missy Krissy
07-13-2013, 12:19 PM
@Flea - Wow, I actually feel a little bad for those people!

For me it wasn't so much a single, distinct moment, but rather a series of events:

Seeing how big I had gotten when looking at current photographs, or searching for pants in a size 16, for example.

There was one time, before I got pregnant, when I was walking around my apartment without a shirt on. DH looked at me and asked if the cat had scratched me.

"Huh? What do you mean?"

"Right there" (as he pointed to my tummy).

*look down*

"Oh, no, those are just my stretch marks." :o

07-13-2013, 12:47 PM
- When I ripped the seam of my pants bending over, and couldn't find one single pair in my closet that still fit

- Playing with my 3 year old granddaughter, and she could out run me

- Realizing that maybe the reason my knees hurt so badly going up stairs is because of all the weight they had to support

Only Believe
07-13-2013, 01:13 PM
This time I realized it when my largest clothing started getting tight.
But there have been several in the past.
Like when my son was small and rode an elephant at the zoo. I was shocked to read on the sign that I was too fat to ride an elephant. (I think it said you had to be under 250 lbs) At that time it really bothered me not so much now though I'm still too fat to ride that elephant :( edited to say I would never want to ride one anyway
Or the time my mom was telling me how much weight someone had gained that she hadn't seen in a while. "Oh she was great big!!!" then looking me over said "about your size".
Oh there's more but no time for it all here LOL

Mama Whitty
07-13-2013, 01:37 PM
Wow! Makes you really think of what others are going through.

I have three moments.

1) The first time for me was after I had my youngest. He was only 6 months old and I had to be a bridesmaid in my sisters wedding. Let's just say I am 1 of 5 girls and I look huge in all the pictures. Now that I think about I can't believe I didn't cut myself any slack for just having a baby. I was still nursing for goodness sakes.

2) I went out with a bunch of girlfriends to a burlesque show. I spent so much time getting ready. Had on a beige Banana Republic dress and Jimmy Choos. I thought I looked pretty good. Then my friend posted pictures on Facebook and tagged me. I looked like a stuffed sausage sitting down. I immediately untagged myself and changed the settings on my facebook. Now people have to get my approval before I am allowed to be tagged.

3) The last year I had to live with my sister. She came to stay with us in Houston. We have a carriage house, so she had her space. Anyways, she lost 30 pounds last year and I never felt so fat as I did then. I was at my heaviest which is 150. I still remember her saying that she deprived herself of eating lots of things to stay thin. I am not sure if that was directed at me, but all I could think about was never being able to do that.

ETA: There is nothing like laying out by your pool and having to see your sister looking hot in a bikini to ruin your self esteem. Ugh!

BTW, I do love my sister, it's pure jealousy on my part. In fact out of five, she is my favorite.

07-13-2013, 03:58 PM
Zut alors!

I've just read through all of these and it's so sad to see the way that we've all been treated. By ourselves and others. It's awful not fitting in to the "normal" area of life.

I've had about 10 million realisations throughout my life over how overweight I am.

When I was much younger, I went on a field trip and 4 of us were riding in my teacher's car. One of the girls yelled out "front seat!" and my teacher--right in front of me--pulled her aside and said "You had better let Jess sit in the front seat. I don't think she can fit in the back with the other two." That was the first time I saw that my weight wasn't a big secret that only I could see.

Lately, though, I've heard about my weight from my father (who looks about 11 months pregnant so give me a break), my mother; and my best friend and I often joke about how "we're the fat kids." It used to be a first-person declaration, but then it turned in to "we."

Not to mention, my own realisation that none of my clothes fit anymore. I refused to go up a size. REFUSED.

07-13-2013, 04:28 PM
I was fat my whole life so ther are many. A few that stick in my head :

1. My third grade teacher was doing opposites and used me and another girl for examples. I was "fat' and the other girl was "thin"...I still can not believe a teacher did that...

2. When my dad one time told me after he hugged me that he would love me no matter how big I got, and held out wide arms...then said even if I get as big as Aunt L (his very obese sister)...he has since made rude remarks about me being too skinny at time when I have gotten down near goal weight before getting pregnant.

3. When my "friends" (guys) from high school told me that I was a really nice friend, but not the kind of girl that guys date or take to prom, because I was fat. This was in response to me not going to prom because I couldnt get a date...a little perspective, I was a freaking size 14....yeah, but that was way too fat apparently...

And in response the the "too fat to ride an elephant story, a male friend of mine (not one of the a holes from high school) who makes lite of his weight issues, decided to lose some weight awhile back because he wanted to go sky diving, but there was a weight limit...I think it was also like 250 lbs (he's on the shorter side so over 250 lbs was a lot on his frame)...anyway he told me it was time when he realized he was "too fat to fall."...lol

Balanced Life
07-13-2013, 06:15 PM
I saw a pic of myself at 210 lbs and also was just squeezing in to a size 18... Now I am 145 and a size 6-8 but some days it is still hard to remember how far I have come. I have been overweight since I was a kid. I try to embrace eating healthy and exercising. At age 43 I am in the best shape of my life and ran a marathon in May so i guess it's all relative. I want to keep going 20 more lbs, but in honesty, I am learning to love myself as long as I am healthy.

07-13-2013, 07:30 PM
i just remember being kind of in denial about it. i'd always get made fun of, there'd always be comments from family members, but i tended to internalize and block it out pretty well. then one day i just kind of woke up and thought, "jesus, i'm fat. i am a fat person. i am one of those people."

i mean, since i've learned that big is beautiful too and i don't think of fat people as "those" people anymore, but there was a lot of self loathing wrapped up in all of those thoughts i was having about myself and others.

i still occasionally feel fat around others. the other day someone told me, "wow, you're so beautiful! you'd have been the ideal back in [such and such time]." then she said, "you know, because your skin is porcelain. you look like a porcelain doll." it just kinda felt odd because she was obviously talking about my curves and then felt uncomfortable about it afterward.

i like my body, but sometimes when i compare it to other peoples', i still feel huge.

Amy Remixed
07-19-2013, 01:25 AM
- When I was about 13, my friend Marina and I went for a swim in my pool. Afterwards we went into my room and sat on the bed. Our suits were still wet. When we got up, we left wet butt prints on my bed cover. Marina's butt print was tiny... mine was gigantic.

- When I was 25, I was involved in a car accident. The firemen strapped me to a board and had to lift me out. When it was time to lift one fireman yelled, "We need more men!"

- Recently I had a lunch time makeout session with a friend. We were in my car and he suggested we get into the back seat. I have a two door. When I tried to get into the back... I couldn't fit through. We had to move back up front.

07-19-2013, 11:50 AM
When I realized there was another chin that showed up to the party. Go away. You're not invited.

07-19-2013, 12:13 PM
I've always known I was chubby, but it really hit home when I was steadily gaining weight and was almost to 200 pounds. Also, mom told me that the stretch marks on my lower stomach look like someone tried to cut me open with a knife.

07-19-2013, 12:15 PM
I usto be thin and real active when I was younger.. in cheerleading wrestling than I got jumped by 5 girls in 8th grade and that's when I got put onto depression pills. and the doctor put me on phentermine to help regulate thing.. also birth control for regulating my periods. after a year I just stopped taking everything because I didn't need that and BAM I got bigger

I also remember my dad telling me if u get any bigger your going to look like a blimp

these last few years I noticed the double chin in pictures.. im more sluggish.. and no energy to do anything..

07-19-2013, 12:27 PM
My heart breaks for each of you ladies experiences. I have had many of them, from the "bathing suit butt" to the verbally abusive parent. Being overweight/obese from a young age, it's not just any single event for me, just a general way I was treated or ignored throughout my life. When I was in middle school I really started seeing the inequities between how my thin friends (and sisters) were treated and how I was treated. I hate that any child should have to suffer the things we did, it's so unfair, it just kills me. Each of you are beautiful and strong in unique ways, thank you for sharing your stories.

07-19-2013, 06:51 PM
It was one particular day shopping with my little sister and I ran into an old co-worker who said I was getting so big she didn't recognize me although she was the one who recognized me first! And then later my father making a comment about my size being big. My little sister defended me saying "Dad don't call her big! She's not fat."

WTF! People are so rude! It all happened in the same day within hours of each other. I just know that my mother wasn't pleased either with how I looked and everyone was just so disapproving and rude.

I concluded nobody loves you when you're fat.

07-19-2013, 07:09 PM
I'm a side sleeper, and my first wakeup moment was at 183lbs when I couldn't breathe properly on my side because my tummy was so heavy it pulled my diaphragm down.

The second time it was a trip to buy a new bathing suit (just recently, at about 160lbs) where I realized how much weight I've gained back.

07-19-2013, 08:28 PM
@Amy Remixed: your first two made me laugh!

My dad told me I was getting fat and should slim down some, when I was 11.
I couldn't fit in the safety restraint on a ride at the amusement park.
I think the last one was, I was too fat to go horseback riding while on vacation.

07-19-2013, 08:44 PM
I knew I was fat and I knew I needed to lose weight, but I was very very depressed and didn't care so I kept eating. The only thing that slapped me into reality was when I started to have marriage problems. When I have really deep problems, that's when I can't eat. And I automatically used the first few days of not eating as the start of my diet. Of course it eventually took off into a full fledged "I am going to lose weight to look and feel great diet". I am still having marriage problems, but I look awesome and if I get a divorce, I am going to look fabulous not only for myself but my next boyfriend lol

07-20-2013, 12:26 PM
This time around it was when I couldn't tie my shoelaces on my gym shoes. It took so much work struggling to sit sideways and try to pull up each leg and then reach far enough to get the shoes on my feet and then hold that position while I tied them. It took me over half an hour to get my shoes on. I'm pretty sure I could have skipped the gym because that was quite the work out.

The other thing was having a health scare where the doctors started talking about a life expectancy of a few years. The shoes got me started. Getting the stuffing scared out of me due to all my bad choices has kept me going.

07-20-2013, 12:49 PM
When i was a teen and only slightly overweight my dad told me my thighs were too big and proceeded to show me how to do squats :p

Playing in a basketball game in 8th grade some on the other team decided to call me "bubbles" ... then some in the stands chimed in too. At first I didn't get it but then I realized they were referring to the cellulite in my thighs :p

I was sitting beside a tiny elderly lady ... a stranger ... she pinched my leg and said, "you're getting a little to fleshy aren't you, honey?" :p

Mission Fat to Fab
07-20-2013, 01:22 PM
I've always been fat, the fat kid, the fattest in class, the fattest in the gym. Even now, I hate going to new places because I feel so huge.
Last week was a best friend's birthday party at a beach club, and although most girls were walking around in bikinis, I felt so self-conscious about having to wear a one-piece swimsuit.
I almost didn't go, but I knew I'd really upset my friend, so I went as a surprise for her. When I got there I realised all that mattered was that I was there for my friend, and we had an amazing time.

07-20-2013, 01:32 PM
i used to be skinny then unfortunately i had a health problem (kidney stones) and these was not a 1 time surgery these happen 5 times so i would get chubby and chubbier and the girls on school would bully me, my mom give me healthy food and would lose weight but then i would had another kidney stone and so on so since elementary school i know i been fat, its a constant fight.

07-20-2013, 06:16 PM
when I was on holiday in Feurteventura my daughter, ex partner and I were going on a camel ride. as we were in the queue the assistant came up and said to me, 'oh its okay, we have strong camels'. I nearly died of embarresment.
on the same holiday, back in the uk and heading home, we were waiting for our train at the station when a little girl asked her dad/granddad whatever, where the ticket booth was, he replied 'over where that fat lady is standing.' this was double sucky, as I was now 'fat' and also a 'lady', I was about 25 yrs old and didn't want to be called either.

07-20-2013, 07:25 PM
I realized it when I was desperately trying not to buy clothes larger than a size 14 and the pictures. They all happened at the same time... I was so much larger than my friends...

But I didn't start losing weight immediately. I was still in a lot of denial!

07-21-2013, 04:58 PM
Reading all these has been an oddly therapeutic experience! Like many others here I was overweight all my life. These experiences when we're young shape our views of ourselves later which makes it so much harder to want to be healthy when we still see ourselves as fat and unlovable!

On the bus in 6th grade, I was having a thoughtful afternoon and someone asked what I was thinking about. " Lunch" was someone's answer before I could even open my mouth.

As a girl at the pool, " her leg's look like my mom's!"

Even after I had lost a lot of weight and felt better about myself than I had in years, normal almost, a foreign language teacher used me as an example for a word that means " chubby."

Weird thing is, I wouldn't trade these experiences for anything. It's made me who I am!

07-21-2013, 08:56 PM
I always knew I needed to lose weight, but never made a big deal out of it because I figured it was only 30 pounds or so, and I'd lose it some day.

That is until I ended up in the the ICU because an ovarian cyst had burst and was bleeding into my abdominal cavity and my body was going into shock. After surgery, I was promptly diagnosed with PCOS (my ovaries were riddled with cysts) and told to lose weight immediately to prevent this from happening again. I then started to take those 30 pounds or so, more seriously!

07-21-2013, 10:21 PM
I wasn't overweight at all in high school, but I will always remember the day that my Mom asked me, very seriously, if I was pregnant. Ever since then I have been very aware, and self conscious, regarding my lower belly pooch.

The moment I realized I had gotten "fat" was when a bunch of little annoying things added up, and were topped off by me not being able t get off the couch easily. I had to scooch and -heft- myself up. Something just snapped in that moment.

07-21-2013, 11:51 PM
As many have already said there have been many times where I've been reminded of how overweight I've been throughout my whole life. I remember my best friend's mom talking about how I had "cute chubby fingers" when I was like 8. I also remember crying when I watched the video of my 13th birthday party because I could see how fat I looked. I was also turned down at the elephant ride a few people have mentioned.. I was so humiliated. I remember my dad making a few comments about my weight and criticizing me anytime I tried to eat a snack. I quit the softball league (after playing for 4 seasons) when I was 14 after I heard a comment from the side line about my running and how I was fat.. etc I can't remember being thin (since I've been chubby since I was like 7) so it's more like a huge list of all the times I've been reminded of my weight.

07-22-2013, 02:05 PM
I can't really play this game because I've never not known I was fat, even in the years when I wasn't fat. I hope to someday be able to chime in on the "when did you realize you were no longer fat" thread. If there's not one, I'll start it :D

07-22-2013, 03:54 PM
Boys were SO mean to mean in school, ESPECIALLY middle school. Looking back now, I really wasn't even THAT big. I was probably a size 10-12 in middle school, and Lord knows I'd love to be that size now!

I VIVIDLY remember a time in gym class where I was humiliated. We were playing basketball and I went up for a rebound and when I came back down one of the boys yelled "EARTHQUAKE!" I mean, that was 14 years ago and it's STILL to this day burned into my memory. Ugh. Also, in high school my friends and I took a trip to Myrtle Beach in the summer. I was probably around 150lbs or so and I felt confident enough to wear a two piece bathing suit. I remember we were out by the pool and I decided to walk over and dip my foot in to rinse off the sand. Some a-hole guy shouted down to me from his balcony "Hey, you're fat!" I mean, really? What the **** would possess someone to just say that?

So there's just a drop in the hat of all the things that have geared me towards getting healthy and thin!

07-30-2013, 11:53 PM
@ Stars! Sorry you're still having marital problems, but you're outlook is brilliant!

07-31-2013, 12:13 AM
I just recently had my "your fat" moment. I always knew I had gained weight since high school, but it's been my mentality that I was just "chubby" I was trying to find a dress for my dads wedding and so I was all "hey, your prob dress is subtle and stretchy, it could work!" we'll needless to say- I was mortified. I had to rip the dress to get it off. I signed up for IP the next day

07-31-2013, 12:48 AM
I've always been fat (or "fluffy") since I was a kid but my "ah ha" moment to start losing for good came last July. I had actually started ww in January of 2012. Lost about 15lbs and then fell off the wagon. Went to Harry Potter World, was crazy excitrd to have my picture taken in front of the castle only to hate myself for how they turned out. It took a couple of months longer to get my act together and have steadily been going for it since September. There's been weeks I've been lax on myself but I refuse to fall off the wagon again... and if I'd just stayed with it in January, I could be at goal now. Won't let that happen again.

07-31-2013, 01:42 AM
Well, I was a "big boned" kid all my life.... It's funny how we always blame things on genetics (yes it plays a small factor, but not to the extent of the excuses we use, haha)
I have ALWAYS been stared at by people, especially in clothing stores...
I've had my baby brother tell me I was fat
My Grandpa stares at me when I eat, and then proceeds to lecture me about not getting seconds, and asking if I had enough yet... (this has gone on since I was 7 years old at least, and he hasnt stopped)
I didn't fit on half the rides at the amusement park when I went the last two times
I think a big moment was when my aunt blamed me once when I was around 9 years old when my cousin and I climbed up on a bunk bed, and the flimsy mattress holder broke in half, and she told me I was "too big" to be on the bed with anyone
Another big factor is when numerous boys have told me "well, even if you aren't beautiful on the outside, you are beautiful on the inside, and one of the nicest people ever! (Huh, apparently appearances matter in this day and age, who would'a thunk? haha)
I remember thinking that I never wanted my thighs to be as big and as chunky as my Grandma's thighs, and I looked down one day (recently) and realized they were starting to look just like my grandmas....
I also had a big problem with emergency surgery this past January, I was hospitalized for 6 days, and they had some minor issues with the surgery due to my weight...
I've always dreaded having to be lifted up in fear someone will hurt themselves...
I've dreamed of getting big bear hugs were you get picked up and spun, and I've thought to myself, that will never be me... But I plan to change that!

Its so sad to see the abuse that people have endured from being chubby, and the hurt and anger it can cause.... In my job (I work at a college), I see the abuse even now, it's like the bullies never grow up, and the emotional problems it causes is so devastating...

07-31-2013, 12:38 PM
Well... I've been overweight almost all my life, especially when I began hitting puberty.
Anyways... I've had a few "a ha" moments myself...
#1 I had a great aunt who I adored. She was in a nursing home that my grandmother was the director of nursing for... I used to go everyday in the summer and sit with her and read her some of her poetry...just talk.
Anyways, when she was on her death bed in hospice, I came in the room, with nearly my whole family there, and she said "you'd be so pretty if you weren't so fat"... broke my heart, still to this day.
#2 In middle school, a boy called one of my guy friends "gay" which really upset him, so I asked him why he had to be so mean and to just be quiet. So he then told me "why do you have to be so fat, just shut your big fat mouth" ... that one hurt. And of course everyone around "oooooooohed"
#3 A few summers ago (I had actually lost quite a bit of weight). My fiance had told me that one of his friends, when drunk, gets really attracted to overweight girls (I called bs, I think it's just him showing his true colors). Anyways, we were all hanging out, he was drinking a lot, got drunk, and kept hugging me.... ugh I was so disgusted.
#4 In high school, I went on a youth group trip to West Virginia. We were tubing down a river, everyone was flipping each other off the tubes and into the water. A boy was just about to flip me, when my pastor sternly said to him "not this one, it's not safe." Meaning that, I wasn't physically strong enough to pull myself into my tube (which I was). I just wanted to die.

07-31-2013, 06:09 PM
My mother couldn't stop talking about how fat I was. She was petite and pretty and had 3 big, fat kids. She constantly expressed her disgust at how we looked (she was also alcoholic and bipolar). My father and his side of the family are all overweight.

When I was 9 years old, my mother put me on a liquid diet and diet pills. When that didn't work, she would scream at me and tell me that nobody wants a fat girl.

I honestly don't know how I survived that but it is probably why I started eating more.

08-01-2013, 03:32 AM
Age 8: A few friends and I wanted to make a human pyramid, and decided the people that weighed the most should be on the bottom. The other girls went first... 55lbs, 50lbs, 47lbs. I stepped on the scale last, and was 80lbs. Before that, I had no real concept of weight in general, let alone how my body compared to others. But in that moment I realized I was different from the other girls, and I was fat.

Age 10: A few girls from my class were standing on the jungle gym talking with some guys. One (skinny, pretty) girl, asked baitingly to the guy I was crushing on if he'd ever date me. He responded "She's too... she's too" and moved his hands apart, signalling wideness. The girl interrupted him and said to me obnoxiously "you're too good for him." I'd already knew I was fat, but I think this event really solidified the feelings of shame, inferiority, and lack of confidence as a result of it.

Both events are still crystal clear to me. Pretty sad.