Weight Loss Support - Some Thoughts about Rude Behavior




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gailr42
05-18-2013, 10:48 AM
I just finished reading yet another thread about rude behavior towards overweight people.

Below is a rather long excerpt from a book by Paul Theroux. He says that people doing solitary, healthful activities seem to be targets for bullies. He says this is part of our American culture of violence and suspicion towards others who are doing something just a bit eccentric in the eyes of a bully.

Being female makes us more vulnerable to bullying by men, anyway. When a woman of size is proudly marching down the street, or jogging at the track or cycling around the neighborhood, she is doing something unusual and somewhat threatening to what many men see as the status quo. To put it another way, a group of young men cruising around eating fast food and possibly drinking beer are feeling the strength in numbers that it takes to turn them into a small, mean mob.

So, in some cases, I think rudeness towards a woman of size may not have to do so much with her size, but with her attitude and the activity in which she participates. If she were different in some other way, that difference would be the reason to harass her.

Anyway, read this. It's interesting.

http://books.google.com/books?id=SqQKBYbI4-8C&pg=PA65&lpg=PA65&dq=paul+theroux+the+moving+target&source=bl&ots=g5gDFi9cnQ&sig=WnSKf0yUBbarHwokz_KLeMZmEaY&hl=en&ei=9SSkS7vgA4X6NbmutcgI&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=1&ved=0CAYQ6AEwAA#v=onepage&q&f=false


Amarantha2
05-18-2013, 11:02 AM
Good perspective. I agree with him. But I also believe that people in general are just sometimes subject to rudeness & harassment by others &/or subject to urges to harass & bully others that they may or may not act upon. And I also think that has nothing to do with size, gender or anything else external. Meanness, like kindness, just is hard wired into the biology of being human.

It is important IMO not to internalize such episodes directed against us or ascribe them to prejudice against size or whatever (although sometimes prejudice is a motive) & it is important not to give in to our human urges to harass or be mean to others.

Missy Krissy
05-18-2013, 04:49 PM
Very interesting.

Years ago before I gained weight I used to ride my bike back and forth to work over a distance of about 10 miles (one way). I didn't get out of work until very late (1am) and would be on my way home right when the bars close (2am). Lots of @$$holes liked to shout at me from the windows of cars as they drove past. I'm pretty sure it had nothing to do with my weight, because at that time I was in the "normal" range.


gailr42
05-18-2013, 05:37 PM
What both of you said...

freelancemomma
05-19-2013, 09:51 AM
On the other hand... Two months ago I was on vacation in Texas. One morning, while I was out running, a man driving by rolled down his window and yelled out, "It's always the ones who don't need to work out that are doing it. That's a compliment, by the way." Totally made my day (and the days following it)!

Freelance

Missy Krissy
05-19-2013, 10:18 AM
@Freelance - Nice!