Weight Loss Support - I really want to KILL myself!




View Full Version : I really want to KILL myself!


BettieGordon
05-03-2013, 09:59 PM
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Skettihead03
05-03-2013, 10:10 PM
Hi Bettie, and welcome to 3fc. First of all, try to calm down. I know it seems hopeless at the beginning, I'm sure all or most of us have been there. It's very possible to lose weight, you just need to stay dedicated.

First things first, the portion issue. It is better to eat large portions of healthy food and feel full and satiated than to eat smaller poor choices throughout the day. And, when you eat the right foods, and drink plenty of water you tend to feel more full than when not. Before, I could easily eat a cheesesteak sub and 6 mozarella sticks, glass after glass of coke and still want a huge piece of cake or whatever for dessert.

Now, I can eat 4 oz of chicken, 1/2 a cup of steamed broccoli and have a glass or two of water at dinner and feel stuffed. I also found that I'm not starving the next morning like I would be when I ate junk. Most of that is because your body does not get the nutrients it needs from sodium and sugar packed fatty foods with no nutritional benefits.

I think you should use the fact that you have pre diabetes and you are unhappy with your appearance to motivate and fuel you. Little changes in the beginning make all the difference and will help you stay on track and not quit. Once it gets easier, you can increase. Like to start off, try cutting back on all drinks besides water and increase your water. Try counting calories or increase fruits and veggies and decrease sugary snacks. Try some light exercising, and when all these things get a little bit easier and you're used to them, increase your exercise and adjust your diet to be even healthier.

And lastly (sorry for the novel, lol!) if you are serious about being depressed or having suicidal tendencies ("I really want to KILL myself!") you should probably see someone to talk to. I know you have seen a psychiatrist but I would suggest seeing a new one if you really have those thoughts. Most importantly, YOU CAN DO THIS! and we will all be here to support you. Good luck!

luckymommy
05-03-2013, 11:02 PM
I want to offer you some hugs! I know you're going through some very difficult times, but you are so young and have your whole future ahead of you! I know there are times when it's hard to imagine things getting better, but if you try to replace the negative thoughts in your head with positive ones, then little by little, things will improve.

First, I agree with Skettihead03, drink only water. No soda, juice and not even any diet drinks (they can make you even hungrier). I know you said that money is tight so maybe you can buy some frozen fruits/veggies? Those have just as many vitamins as fresh and often they even have more because they're frozen when they're still at their peak.

Try to increase your physical activity because that will help with not only getting healthier, but also with your mood. Keep a journal and write your thoughts down...that has been shown to be just as helpful as therapy...although you should still see someone if you can afford it. Before you go to bed, come up with 3 things you are grateful for every night and write them down. Doing that for a month will really improve your mood, according to a study I read.

Portion control is sooo hard. Try to plan every meal and snack and only have a small portion (not too small, of course). If you start craving food and you know that you're not truly hungry, see if you can drink some hot tea. Maybe take a walk or turn on some songs you like on youtube and dance around.

Little changes can add up to a lot. Check here often! There's a support group here for people who struggle with depression. You can have online friends. As you start to feel better about yourself, you will probably make some friends because people will gravitate toward your positive energy!

I highly recommend you watch The Secret on youtube. It's all about positive energy and how it makes your life so much better and how you can achieve it.

I really hope you feel better very soon!


freelancemomma
05-04-2013, 08:13 PM
To put your situation in perspective: I didn't have a boyfriend until I was 21, and even then it was because I forced myself to go out with the guy. Observe yourself, see what works and what doesn't, and take it one meal at a time. You'll be fine. You're already fine. Change one small habit at a time and focus on the awesome life you're about to have. Your English is flawless, by the way.

Freelance

NemesisClaws
05-04-2013, 08:59 PM
Hun, I'm in my 30's, and haven't had a serious boyfriend yet. Been out on a date or two, but I'm more focused on trying to get my career going than I am with getting a family started. It's all about choices in life, and what you want to do. So don't get stressed out over feeling like you're way behind the curve, because you're not. :)

I recommend getting an exercise dvd and working out to it. I just bought some HipHop AB's dvd's that focuses on dancing, and I'm hoping it'll get me motivated enough to stick with it.

And if you're really serious about suicide, please don't do that! Talk with your family, friends, or someone trained who can help you. No matter how bad things might seem right now, it's never the answer.

wolfgirl69
05-05-2013, 09:42 AM
I am 17 going on 18 never had a serious relationship never been on a date -just now making friends. You know why? Therapy. It helps a lot. My therapist says you need to learn to love, care, befriend, support, and manage yourself first. And it seems from my perspective you need help with that. She says I can't do all that and it had left me a wreck (wreck is my word) because of my rough neglectful first year of life. My previous childrens psychologist (When I was 12) said that would happen. I just want you know you have to love, support, care, and befriend yourself first.

Therapy could also help you with your eating problem. It seems your eating from my perspective to fill a void in your life. They can help.

You don't have to take my advice or even read this. It's just a suggestion.

zoesmom
05-05-2013, 09:56 AM
I am 17 going on 18 never had a serious relationship never been on a date -just now making friends. You know why? Therapy. It helps a lot. My therapist says you need to learn to love, care, befriend, support, and manage yourself first. And it seems from my perspective you need help with that. She says I can't do all that and it had left me a wreck (wreck is my word) because of my rough neglectful first year of life. My previous childrens psychologist (When I was 12) said that would happen. I just want you know you have to love, support, care, and befriend yourself first.

Therapy could also help you with your eating problem. It seems your eating from my perspective to fill a void in your life. They can help.

You don't have to take my advice or even read this. It's just a suggestion.

^^^^^THIS

I was on massive medications for a cocktail of mental issues most of my life. My doctor finally referred me to a therapist, Chris. I HATED my therapist. She would challenge me to do stuff...the nerve! I mean, if it was just me that I was worried about, then the world could just go on. But when someone else counted on me? I grumbled and mumbled and did it.

First, Chris made me go to a concert. Sounds fun, right? OH MY FREAKING GOD I COULD HAVE KILLED HER! I never knew so many people could go to a concert. I never knew just HOW terrified of people I really was. I was in a panic attack within seconds of seeing the TRAFFIC for the concert, much less the people there. Good thing my mom went with me, or I likely would have turned around I was so terrified.

But, once it was over? I felt like a million bucks! I mean, I went to a venue with 50 thousand people! AWESOME!

She did stuff like that...she would challenge me to go to sporting events, she would challenge me to go to nice restaurants by myself (GULP!), she would challenge me to do volunteer work (how I landed a pretty sweet job, actually), she challenged me to join a gym, join a meet up group, and the list goes on.

And slowly, bit by bit, I started decreasing my meds. I stopped being so depressed. I stopped fretting over everything. I suddenly was gaining friends. I suddenly...had a life. I suddenly had a amazing guy, who later became my husband and the father of my wonderful kid. Don't get me wrong, life isn't perfect. I still am on a nice little collection of mental medications, but life is easier. I can genuinely say I am happy. Five years later, I now only take 4 medications now instead of 7. But the doses are lower. And, simply put, I love life. Life is just too short to hate it. Chris taught me that. Too sad I lived 20 years thinking it was too long.

At this point, if you are depressed, don't worry about your weight. Seriously. That comes with time. You have to get right mentally to get right physically. You can do this. Have faith. And your psych isn't doing anything but pumping you full of drugs. That's what they do. You need a counselor. I never knew there was a difference until I met Chris, but there is. And my psych was a poor substitute to a happy me.

You can do this. I know you can. :hug: Many of us have been there. Many of us have come out of it. You can too.

wolfgirl69
05-05-2013, 10:08 AM
^^^^^THIS

I was on massive medications for a cocktail of mental issues most of my life. My doctor finally referred me to a therapist, Chris. I HATED my therapist. She would challenge me to do stuff...the nerve! I mean, if it was just me that I was worried about, then the world could just go on. But when someone else counted on me? I grumbled and mumbled and did it.

First, Chris made me go to a concert. Sounds fun, right? OH MY FREAKING GOD I COULD HAVE KILLED HER! I never knew so many people could go to a concert. I never knew just HOW terrified of people I really was. I was in a panic attack within seconds of seeing the TRAFFIC for the concert, much less the people there. Good thing my mom went with me, or I likely would have turned around I was so terrified.

But, once it was over? I felt like a million bucks! I mean, I went to a venue with 50 thousand people! AWESOME!

She did stuff like that...she would challenge me to go to sporting events, she would challenge me to go to nice restaurants by myself (GULP!), she would challenge me to do volunteer work (how I landed a pretty sweet job, actually), she challenged me to join a gym, join a meet up group, and the list goes on.

And slowly, bit by bit, I started decreasing my meds. I stopped being so depressed. I stopped fretting over everything. I suddenly was gaining friends. I suddenly...had a life. I suddenly had a amazing guy, who later became my husband and the father of my wonderful kid. Don't get me wrong, life isn't perfect. I still am on a nice little collection of mental medications, but life is easier. I can genuinely say I am happy. Five years later, I now only take 4 medications now instead of 7. But the doses are lower. And, simply put, I love life. Life is just too short to hate it. Chris taught me that. Too sad I lived 20 years thinking it was too long.

At this point, if you are depressed, don't worry about your weight. Seriously. That comes with time. You have to get right mentally to get right physically. You can do this. Have faith. And your psych isn't doing anything but pumping you full of drugs. That's what they do. You need a counselor. I never knew there was a difference until I met Chris, but there is. And my psych was a poor substitute to a happy me.

You can do this. I know you can. :hug: Many of us have been there. Many of us have come out of it. You can too.

Yep therapy can throw challenges-but that's one of it's biggest helps. That's why I can't back out of that mall get together with my friend this month. I have to push through. It's always cool to hear another person helped with therapy. :D

forreal
05-05-2013, 06:02 PM
Hi everyone. I'm Bettie, a 18-year-old future flight attendant (still studying) that weights 209 massive pounds. I need serious help, just not from a psychiatrist. I've already been to one, who made me take an antidepressant for 2 entire years. Obviously it didn't help me. Also, I never had a boyfriend because, well, I don't even have friends! All I have in my life are my parents and my two puppies. I love to eat, I seriously LOVE to eat. I'm sure I'm addicted, or at least obsessed. I try to control myself with the kind of foods I eat, but I can't control my portions. I'm too poor to eat a healthy varied diet anyway, which means I'll stick to toasts with cream cheese and turkey ham, which is really bad for me since I have pre-diabetes. And for those who were wondering why my English is so bad, it's because I'm Romanian.
Please help me, I'm LOST. :cry:


So you're 18 years old; going to school for a good job; and have both your parents. You're a lucky girl. I will assume your parents love and support you because you didn't indicate otherwise.

You're addicted to food. Join the club. I love to eat too. If food is a passion, then spend some time cooking. Search for low-budget recipes you can try so you can enjoy cooking. Do you live alone or with your parents? Tell them if they supply the ingredients, you'll cook something special for them.

Get out. Take the dog for walks. Go to free concerts in the park. Get a
part-time job so you can have some extra money. Does your school have any clubs you can join?

And - as Luckymommy suggested - watch "The Secret" (full movie) on youtube -- it's very inspiring. (Thanks LM for suggesting it - I took the time to watch it before responding to this message. I'm going to make some changes!)

You've got to appreciate the things you do have. Be thankful for your parents; be thankful for your health. We have control of our lives - and it's up to us to make the best of it. Don't be someone who says "If only this or if only that... (I could go on and on... because I am so thankful for the things I do have. Yes, I'm in pain every minute of every day - but life is good. You won't find me crying in my beer - I'm going to drink it and enjoy it!
:carrot: