100 lb. Club - Newbie looking for support
05-03-2013, 07:57 PM
Hi everyone my name is Monique. I am here to get support and give support with weightloss. I am roughly 100 pounds over weight and have been for years. I work have 3 kids and a husband. My problem is that I do not have a sense of self worth. I am very negative about myself. My husband is very unsupportive, he a very un-emotional person. He quite thin as well. My girls on the other hand are packing on the weight to and it worries me. They only have done what I taught them and eat how I taught them. I usually never stick to dieting much after a week. I get depressed or sad easily and go right back to my old ways. I want to change I don't know how to be not depressed, eat out of emotion. I honestly don't know how to stop that. I have a lot of stress in my life and it affects me. ANY WAYS 1 THING AT A TIME RIGHT?
Anyways I hope I can gain support here I am up for this challenge of a life time. pheww I am gunna need it :carrot:
05-03-2013, 08:35 PM
Welcome Monique! You're in the right place to get and give support. We'll be here to cheer on your successes and give hugs when you stumble. I'm sorry that your husband isn't giving you the support you would like, but good for you to try and get healthier for yourself and your children. Involving them in your new eating and exercise habits may give you the support you need at home.
I completely understand about giving up after only a short time, I've been on track since the middle of January and this is the longest I've ever been this conscious about my eating and exercise in years. What helped me is having a pretty definite plan. I use myfitnesspal to track my calories, schedule my workouts and try to visit 3fc everyday.
You can do this! We're here for you. Good luck!
05-03-2013, 09:10 PM
Thank you so very much look at you go eh. That weightloss for you is tremendous congrats! I can only inspire to what you've done in such a short time. lol tonight I had a chicken burger but tomorrow im starting .. first thing gym membership. and go from there ..so what the drill around here is there certain things I need to do to get this going adding timelines and ect.. let me know
05-03-2013, 09:25 PM
Hey there! Welcome to the forum. This is my favorite forum and my "home" forum. It's great support wise. If you like to read, I'd suggest checking out Full-Filled and Beck Diet Solution books. I don't think I can ever lose weight unless I LOVE myself first. Everytime I start a diet out of personal hate of myself, I give up. But when I love myself as I am now, I can last longer because I'm just showing my body that I do love it. This is one of the things that the Full-Filled book does touch on. None of these books really recommend an eating plan which I love. I can use it with any way of eating.
Also, those other times you've dieted, what have you done? Learn from those to figure out what didn't work for you and try something different. You can do this. You just have to make it work for your body. I switch my ways of eating multiple times to keep things fresh and just to keep trucking.
05-03-2013, 09:28 PM
Hi Monique and welcome! :welcome:
You are right, one change at a time! Joining 3FC was the best thing you could have done to get this all started! :)
3FC changed my life, I couldn't have lost my weight (and continue to lose) without the amazing support from the men and women on this forum. Find a few threads and make yourself at home. There is so much to learn and I find it a great stress relief to know that I'm not alone in this battle and that we can lean on each other for the rough times and celebrate the good times here.
I hope we see you post often. I hope you love it here as much as I do!
05-03-2013, 09:44 PM
Okay I have had some really good times in the past on forums and I seem to really do well with forums .. This one seems like a large one so there is a lot going on eh.. Yah your right loving your self first is key and that is my problem. I don't think im worth the work the effort its so easy to hate yourself I think... Because loving oneself requires work and dedication.. I dunno what hasn't worked for me in the past but I do know that exercise is good for me my body really reacts well to exercise.. I question to any of you when you all started out the first days is there any advice on how to get good momento.. what did you do what things did you say to your self haha I need something.. im looking forward to the gym I just don't got any work out gear
05-03-2013, 09:55 PM
I struggled with self worth for many years thanks to some personal issues.. but something I did even though it sounds silly is put motivational sayings ALL OVER my walls. They have those wall art stickers that are easy to put on and take off that have motivational sayings.. I put sticky notes on the mirror, in the car, in my wallet, on my phone background..EVERYWHERE..so I was surrounded by positivity. That slowly helped me become more positive and feel more worth it.
I think people quit so easily because they get overwhelmed. They try changing everything at once and then freak out because they have changed everything they are used to.. take it in baby steps.. it is a lifestyle change rather than a diet. I replaced things like chips, cookies, unhealthy snacks in my house with fruit. My kids absolutely LOVE fruit... and then cut back to 1 soda a day instead of like a two liter.
I started incorporating working out into my life once I got used to changing my diet and making healthy choices.
I also find that checking into 3fc daily keeps me on track. When I don't check in I tend to stray from my healthy track.
Welcome and good luck!!!
05-03-2013, 10:34 PM
Sinderelly is absolutely right about making gradual changes. I'm only about 4 weeks in at this point and I've been making adjustments as I go. I'll admit that when I started this I took pretty much every single item of processed food I have to the food pantry, but other than that I've been working down on how many calories I consume, I'm slowly easing into exercise, and I'm figuring out what works and what doesn't as I go along.
Loving yourself is the most important thing...you have to think you are worth the effort and I have no doubt that you are. It's a shame that your husband isn't on board - mine isn't overly supportive either but that's because he's lost his buffet buddy, not because he doesn't think this is worth the effort for me. I don't have any kids, but I think about my nieces and nephews and the example I set for them when I belittle myself in front of them or let them practice bad eating habits - letting my five year old niece have shells n' cheese at 10 o'clock at night probably isn't the best idea.
This is a fantastic forum and it's definitely given me the motivation to achieve the goals I've set, I hope it does for you too. Welcome and best of luck to you!
05-04-2013, 08:26 AM
Hi you guys, well its morning and i am at work lol i made some healthy choices this morning lol....Oatmeal and a bannana while sitting amongst my co workers eating fried eggs bacon and the whole works ...Its painfull for me sometimes ... Working on changing the mindset of a emotional overeater and food addict... One day at a time is very much right ... I think my problem has been that over the years i have rushed everything put to much on my platter NO pun intended haha .. Like i said last night i want to get my gym membership today. This is my goal at the very least making a trip to the gym 1 a week ... If not more... I wanna love myself and have a good relationship with my body ... I deserve it ... My kids deserve it too ...Oh time will tell .. Thanks you guys for all your kind words i know with this place im gunna draw real solid support from it .. looking forward to it ..So is there a group i should join or what i wanna start making freinds abnd having someone to check in on with ? what to do ladies and gents
05-04-2013, 12:25 PM
Welcome and good luck on your journey! You can do this!
05-04-2013, 09:54 PM
I dunno what hasn't worked for me in the past but I do know that exercise is good for me my body really reacts well to exercise.. I question to any of you when you all started out the first days is there any advice on how to get good momento.. what did you do what things did you say to your self haha I need something.. im looking forward to the gym I just don't got any work out gear
Well you mentioned that you never keep track for more than a week. So if you are following a strict diet of 1200 calories, cereal diet, etc, the reason one might give up is because they are hungry/not full filled. The lesson here would be: eat more. See what I'm saying?
What I've done is I start with small changes, no more pop, wearing a pedometer, eating less seconds or incorporating more vegs.
05-04-2013, 10:41 PM
Thanks Daimere I will give that a try the last time I counted calories I was consuming roughly 1500 a day im thinking of taking it up to 1800 with the exercise eventually I will notice a change.. what difficult for me is the amount of veggies and fruit and protein I tend to bind up I do drink water yet it doesn't help .. I guess this is trial and error.. day 1 down feels like forever I gotta stop thinking about it every second it consumes me ... I took pictures today .. hopefully at 1 month from now ill have progress ...wait I will have progress..
05-05-2013, 06:01 AM
hat difficult for me is the amount of veggies and fruit and protein I tend to bind up
Depends on what type of fruit and veggies. Some will stop you up more than others. Evidently bananas will. I've never had that issue. Edamame has really good fiber stats plus heart healthy fats. I've been eating them from the pod at work as a snack cause I can pop them in my mouth. No need for utensils!
05-05-2013, 08:11 AM
I tend to bind up I do drink water yet it doesn't help .. I guess this is trial and error..
I've been having the same problems, I've been trying to eat more fiber or at least taking fiber supplements. I totally get how miserable that feeling is. And yes, this is very much trial and error if you are creating your own plan. I got a little overzealous last week and I have a feeling I will be paying for it next week...but I just have to remind myself that this isn't a race and the most important thing is for me to be healthy.
05-05-2013, 08:46 AM
Daimere okay ill give that a try ...
Punkrocksong..I know what you mean about it not being a race .. I tend to obsess about weightloss and food and the whole shebang.. it has to get easier with time replaces old bad behavior with new good behavior..
I guess what it really is is taking these days one day at a time and not overthingking about it .. I didn't get to 230lbs in a month and I sure aint gunna get it off in 1 ..
05-05-2013, 09:11 AM
I've been reading tonight that virgin coconut oil incorporated into a healthy diet can help relieve constipation and evidently has superfood properties. I don't know about it yet. :p I'm still in the research phase. And some other things to boost fiber: chia seeds/salba or/and ground flax seeds. So if you like smoothies, you could throw a bit of it into the smoothie and instant fiber boost! I add a touch of chia seeds to most my meals. More fiber = hopefully moving waste!
05-05-2013, 09:43 AM
Hey good call ill definatly look into those options as I go along. Do you have the scoop on the 100% green coffee bean pills ive just recently started taking them. there all natural no added ingrediants.
05-05-2013, 10:29 AM
Hi Monique, new here too. Seems like a great place to hang out. I think it is about loving yourself, but in a way, sometimes if I start pushing the actions, the love comes after. So when I eat well, and move, I feel better physiologically, and then I find that I feel better about myself too. Chicken and the egg and all that :) Anyway, best wishes on your journey, I'll be here too!
05-05-2013, 10:37 AM
Hi Annemarie nice to meet you.. Yah loving thy self.. hard concept I always like to think of this you outside body and im talking about appearance weight truly is a reflection of what is going on in the inside .. not everyone but most average persons.. I have to start loving myself .. and heres the worst one I never have .. I have been negative miserable depressed for my entire life I have always had doubts, many many insecurities.. the list goes on.. I wanna know what it feels like to feel free of it ..I don't wanna be a prisoner anymore I wanna live.. hey if you don't mind lets be weighloss buddies if you don't got one :) actually WE ALL are weighloss buddies ..but you know what I mean :)