Weight Loss Support - Tips for dining at friends'?

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04-14-2013, 05:37 PM
Hey there ladies,

What do you do whrn you're invited to dine at friends', and have therefore no control over the food served? This happened to me yesterday and they were kinda late servingn thus i couldn't help mysemf but eat the appetizers, which were ALL fattening: chips, cheese, nuts, with salsa :-(.

Then it was bbq: ate sausages, potatoes and sauce :-(

Then it was dessert: mini chocolate brownies:-(.

Didn't have any wine, but the only na option was industrial apple juice, packed with sugar:-(((.

I don't know how much i gained because it takes my body 2days to process, but i'll telle you tommorrow.

My whole saturday hed been perfect u ntil that dinner!!

04-14-2013, 05:39 PM
Small portions is about the best I could do. Especially if there is any self-serve.

And not eating the stuff you can avoid e.g. the appetizers!!!!!!

04-14-2013, 05:48 PM
Ah Brussels - definitely on my bucket list! I almost made a solo trip there last spring but other things got in the way. Maybe next year....

Oh, sorry - got distracted! Anyway, that's a tough one, Lumia.

Not sure what kind of plan you're on, so I don't know how much the food took you off-plan. If you're counting calories and you know you have something like this coming up, you can try to budget as much as possible so that you have extra calories for the day and/or week and can work it into your count.

But if you are on a more restrictive diet it might be more problematic. I agree with IanG that you can try to just take very small portions. Also try to remember to eat very, very slowly - not always easy to do in social situations. But concentrate on the food you are eating and savor it, each and every bite. You won't eat as much if you slow down.

04-14-2013, 05:58 PM
I always offer to bring items that I enjoy and can fill up on. In your case- I probably would have brought a big beautiful salad and some wine or another beverage you were comfortable drinking.

I went to a superbowl party and brought an awesome veggie tray:
I also brought some fruit to put into sparkling water.

Also- I try not to arrive at parties or dinners hungry, so then I can choose to eat only items that I find to be spectacularly delicious.

ETA: Or if you want to be hardcore, you can bring some protein drinks with you. I use the ones from Metabolic Research Center. They are delicious. 15 grams of protein each. Only 70 calories.
So again- you don't have to be hungry and can make selective choices of what you really want to be consuming.

04-14-2013, 06:01 PM
Lunar makes a great point. I don't think anybody would be offended if you brought something like that to a party.

I was just confronted with that issue yesterday. I do low carb, so I had a burger without a bun and some strawberries for dessert. I would have had some cheese if there was some, but not too much of it.

04-14-2013, 06:12 PM
Bringing something you can eat is the best thing you can do. Not going there hungry is another great advice.

If you're going to a BBQ, there is always the lovely '"meat+vegetable" option. No bread, no potatoes. And apetizers are just, well, not necessary I think ;)

There are, however, situations when I can not avoid eating something not very good for my diet. Or I can avoid it, but the costs are, to me, too high. E.g. my husband's grandmother loves to invite us over for dinner and dessert. She cooks things that are packed with fat or sugar. And she won't have us bring anything. If I don't eat, she will be unhappy. And as much as my diet is important to me, keeping a 85 years old great-grand mother of my babies happy is more important.

So, what I do - I plan ahead. If I am going to have a dessert there, I won't eat too much carbs before we go. I just make place for the calories in my daily plan. And I don't worry if I go over my plan a little. It's just one day, and we go there once or twice a month... I can easily make up for it the next day.

One of the wonderful things "dieting" (I hate the word, but you know what I mean, our new healthy life style) has taught me is to enjoy a little portion of wonderful meals. I chose very carefully what I want to eat. And then I have it. And a small portion of a top quality chocolate makes me much more happy than gobbling up two big chocolate bars as I used to do. So dont' worry to enjoy little sometihng here and there!

04-14-2013, 06:15 PM
I think these are all great suggestions!!

I'm a little neurotic about my diet as some 3FC members already know.;) What works for me is planning a bag of my diet approved foods and bringing them with me. The host always gets a heads up that I have to do this so I'm not wasting his/her time or their extra food. I have only done this a couple of times as I hate to look like an outcast or answer many questions but I don't go off my plan for anyone. :) I mentally can't handle the changes or the guilt, plus I haven't had high fat foods in so long it could be a really bad idea to start at someone else's house. And---I always bring something everyone (including me) can enjoy like Lunar's tray above, except mine never looks that pretty!

04-14-2013, 06:45 PM
These are all great suggestions everyone! I've been thinking about this a lot this week. I'm only 2 weeks into Medifast which is VERY restrictive. I typically spend a Saturday evening or two per month with my best friend and her family. She is a phenomenal cook.

I have purposely not told my friend about my meal restrictions because I know she'd change her menu to accommodate me, and the last thing I want is for others to be impacted by my nutritional choices.

That being said, most all of what my friend prepares has been modified to be light and low fat - so I just have to stay away from the starches and fruits. I did cancel on her this weekend because I was feeling anxious about it :(. Two weeks in I wasn't feeling strong enough to turn down pasta or bread if offered :ink:

04-14-2013, 06:49 PM
I'm a little neurotic about my diet as some 3FC members already know.;)

I love this! If I weren't obsessive about my plan (seriously, I have a dozen charts and graphs), I wouldn't be successful! I'm happy to share in your neurosis!:dizzy:

04-14-2013, 06:53 PM
I love this! If I weren't obsessive about my plan (seriously, I have a dozen charts and graphs), I wouldn't be successful! I'm happy to share in your neurosis!:dizzy:

Only a dozen?? :D JK!!

No one else will care as much about my weightloss as I do so I have to do what is right for me. Like your friend, people will try to accommodate but I need to do things my way for a while and I'm ok with that. :)

And I cancel too when I get anxious...not a lot but I do. :(

Happy to have you share in my neurosis too!! :hug:

04-14-2013, 07:17 PM
If its not every weekend, then I just induldge and chalk it up to "real life situations". I'm talking about once a month or less. If its more frequently, then I just either eat before hand or bring snacks with me. ... or sit as far away from the food as possible and try to keep a conversation going with someone.

Arctic Mama
04-14-2013, 07:49 PM
If there is something there I can eat I do. Otherwise, unless it is situationally appropriate to pack my own food, I just smile and chat while abstaining from eating.

04-15-2013, 09:35 AM
I just do smaller portions. And try to pick the most "healthiest" even if the options aren't the greatest. Smaller portions usually work the best for me. I also try not to show up "starving" because then I'm opted to eat more because of how everything looks so appetizing.

04-15-2013, 09:50 AM
Also- I try not to arrive at parties or dinners hungry, so then I can choose to eat only items that I find to be spectacularly delicious.

I think this is the way to go. "Saving up" for big events by cutting even more calories beforehand never works well for me. I'm too hungry by the time the big event arrives, which pulls the plug on my willpower.


04-15-2013, 09:51 AM
I try to eat ahead of time and eat smaller portions. I make sure to throw whatever veggies are around onto my plate.

04-15-2013, 10:05 AM
I try to bring wonderful, luscious, healthy food -- enough to share with everyone. It seems like so many people are moving to a more healthy palate, so lots of my stuff gets chosen by others. All the better!

04-15-2013, 10:08 AM
I eat before hand. I try not to draw attention to myself and like Article Mama I spend time socializing.

I would never want to put a Hostess out trying to accommodate my dietary needs...and probably I would not really be able to eat it anyway.

I have been on the other side and realize that it can be difficult if not impossible to a accommodate all guests dietary needs .
I am more about spending time with the people then eating with them at this point and time.