Depression and Weight Issues - Alone. It's how I feel.




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MistressMikuru
04-09-2013, 10:45 AM
I'm worried. In a few days time I'll be moving across the country with my mom from a town that's about 7,000 people to a little under 2,000. I'm already really lonely and don't offten get chances to go out because I'm a mom of identical twins. How do I make friends and meet new people in a new town?


IanG
04-09-2013, 11:04 AM
Play dates. Or through work or college. Kids are a great excuse to make friends with other people with kids.

The only problem I have had is with churches. There are some segments of the US population that won't associate with people from other religions or even different churches. So the pleasantries don't turn into real friendships.

The US is very weird like that. Unique even.

MistressMikuru
04-09-2013, 11:26 AM
I'm not religious so church won't really help much...There is a college in the town that I plan on attending. I'm just so nervous at the idea of starting from scratch.


AlmostMe
04-09-2013, 02:11 PM
I'm not religious either, but I'd consider joining a relaxed church anyway. some of them have babycare facilities. I'd think an hour away from young twins would be worth it.

veggiedawg
04-09-2013, 02:21 PM
I agree with IanG--kids are a great excuse to meet other parents!

Find out where all the parks are in your area and go there regularly. You'll start to meet up with other mothers and find out where all the best spots in town are. I'm sure when they see your twins, people will be coming up to you!

Also, check out the library. They sometimes have little story times and then you can stay and chat.

MistressMikuru
04-09-2013, 05:40 PM
Thank you! It is a small town so I could walk to the library which would be good exercise. A lot of people already do approach me, It's crazy. I think I might feel out of place in a church but I'll give that a try too.

IAmTheGlue
04-09-2013, 06:10 PM
I live about 12 miles outside a small town, around 2500 people. One thing about smaller towns is that even just by visiting the same stores again & again, people kind of get to know you. Every place I go, people talk to me. I am a people person, so I talk a lot anyway, but seriously, people in our town are super friendly. They move at a slower pace, though. When we first moved from a city of about 75,000 to a town of around 5000, I felt like they were taking forever to check me out in the stores, because they were getting every single persons whole freaking life story. It drove me nuts, but now, I just chat up the cashiers and it feels like you have a friend everywhere.

Go scout out the parks. I bet your library will have a baby story hour or whatever they are called. That would be a great way to meet people you have common interests with.

Good luck! I hope the move is awesome once you get settled in.

EagleRiverDee
04-09-2013, 07:06 PM
Play dates. Or through work or college. Kids are a great excuse to make friends with other people with kids.

The only problem I have had is with churches. There are some segments of the US population that won't associate with people from other religions or even different churches. So the pleasantries don't turn into real friendships.

The US is very weird like that. Unique even.

That's regional, FYI. Typically on the west coast this is non-existent. I live in Alaska and although we have about as many Churches as we have bars (which is to say, a lot of them) people tend to be very non-judgmental about religion here.

My parents live in North Carolina, and there it is exactly as you describe.

Back to topic- have you thought of Meetup? You could join other parenting groups and also groups that have similar interests to you that you could get out and do stuff with. I love Meetup and am a member of two all-ladies groups, one co-ed outdoors group, and a dog lovers group.

MistressMikuru
04-10-2013, 11:57 AM
Is Meetup an online group or is it an actual real life group?

EagleRiverDee
04-10-2013, 12:08 PM
Is Meetup an online group or is it an actual real life group?

It's a website that posts real-life meetups in your area. So you sign up online, you check the schedule online, but you go to the actual meetups in person. There are meetup groups for pretty much every interest out there, although smaller population areas will probably have less variety.

Last year I went on several all-ladies backpacking overnighters this way. It's a great way to meet people that have similar interests to you. I also go hiking and bicycling by attending Meetups, and this year I signed up for a dog lovers group so I can get my dog out to socialize with other dogs while I socialize with other people. I have trouble making friends the "old fashioned" way since I don't go to bars, I don't attend church, and I'm not in school any longer. So Meetup works for me.

MistressMikuru
04-10-2013, 12:38 PM
I just checked and there was only one group >.>" one that I have no interest in. Thanks for the tip though! I think I'll try some of the bigger cities to see what's happening there too.

EagleRiverDee
04-10-2013, 01:29 PM
I just checked and there was only one group >.>" one that I have no interest in. Thanks for the tip though! I think I'll try some of the bigger cities to see what's happening there too.

If you've got bigger cities nearby, that would probably be a good idea. I know our nearby city gets a lot more activity than my town does.